Hunting Demons: Remastered, Season Two
by PyroQueenOfFire
Summary: Lana Meckenzie met the Winchesters and felt an instant connection to them, and they felt it too. With the unearthed secrets, death and the need to be loved and desire to be trusted, can Lana and Dean stay soul mates? Dean/OC; a little Dean/OC/Sam; Sam/OC
1. In Our Time of Dying

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This is 'Season Two' and it's more angst than anything else, but there is romance and comedy galore in it too. Not to mention that this time around there is more Florence, Jen, Kevin and 3 special guests you'll meet in a bit. Sam gets his big love interest this 'season' as well and I think you'll all love her as much as I do.**

**I suggest tissues for this one.**

**Standard warnings apply: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

When I awoke, I was in a place of only bright white light and I swallowed because I was _really_ hoping this didn't mean that I was dead. It was as if I was in an entirely white room, and I was pretty certain that this was _not_ a good sign. Did this mean that I had bled out so much that I was now in some kind of after life?

"Hello?" I asked aloud.

"Hello." A voice answered.

I turned to see a very beautiful woman near me and she smiled at me and for some reason I felt calm. She didn't seem dangerous, or bitter or anything like that…she just seemed helpful and I was hoping that meant this was a good omen instead of a bad one. So I took a step towards her and cocked my head to the side a little, examining her and trying to find the right words to say.

"I'm sure you're confused. I am Alexian, and I'm your guide." She told me softly.

I definitely _was_ confused. "What do you mean, my guide? Am I—am I dead?"

Alexian shook her head. "Not yet, Alana. You were simply chosen."

"I don't understand." I told her, and then took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and then looked up at her as I sat up slowly.

Alexian nodded. "I know. Alana, you must embrace your destiny. When you finally freed your parents, you were told of Chelsea, and you didn't heed the warning. Chelsea shot you, and you still have yet to find your birth parents. They're a big deal in all of this, Alana—in a way, they're the _reason _that all of this is happening. You are dying right now, Alana, but you are being given one last chance."

"One last chance for what?" I asked her.

"One last chance to find yourself." She said simply. "You're being given a chance to make a choice."

I raised my eyebrows. "So…I'm still a little lost."

Alexian smiled and nodded at me, placing her hands on my shoulders and I couldn't help but follow her as she began to walk. She just seemed so genuine and I didn't really feel like she was trying to hurt me…I really did feel like she was trying to help me no matter how confused I was. If there was a way for me to continue to live, then I was going to need to take it.

"You are more powerful than you can even imagine and this new chance being given to you is being given to you to focus on finding yourself…on being truthful about yourself." Alexian explained as she smiled at me warmly. "Everything that you have done thus far has been done for a reason and you need to understand that. You have wanted nothing more than for Dean and Sam to be safe. More than anything, you wanted to protect Dean, and he wanted to protect you—you're his family. Even when things are as dangerous as they can be, you and Dean sacrifice _everything _for each other. You're one of the most loyal people I've seen in this world. Look at everything you sacrifice." She explained to me.

"And where does it get me?" I asked her slowly.

She smiled at me. "It could get you here."

I followed her to a place that was a future I'd only dreamt about and I found myself tearing up a little. It was a nice house that obviously had kids in it, and the sound of arguing but it was all oddly pleasing to me. I had this feeling in the back of my mind that we weren't going to be able to be this happy ever, but it seemed to me like this was as good a time to try and dwell on an actual future as any.

"Johnny, stop trying to paint your brother!" I heard my future self, cry.

"But Momma, Duncan said my painting was worse than his!" Johnny replied.

Johnny, the little boy that stood in front of me was no more than six, and Duncan wandered into the room and looked about four. The two of them looked very much like Dean, but they had my eyes which made me smile and rest my hand on my stomach reverently.

"Clean this up before your father gets home you two." My other me told them.

"Are you mad at us, Mommy?" Duncan asked as I set my hand on my obviously pregnant belly.

"No sweetheart, but you really shouldn't put the paint anywhere but the paper Daddy and I buy for you." I said, leaning over and stroking his hair, and I clearly saw a diamond ring on her left ring finger—how Dean could afford a diamond, I can't begin to tell you. "Go clean yourself up."

"Lanni, I'm home!" Dean called from the front door.

My other me's face lit up and she went to the door, kissing him softly. He rested his hand on her stomach and nuzzled her neck, making her smile, and making me smile. This Dean was actually visually excited about having kids, and he had two running around and one on the way.

"She's been kicking a lot lately." The other Lana told the other Dean pleasantly.

"Daddy!" Johnny cried, running to him and hugging him.

"There's my boy!" Dean said, picking him up and stroking his hair.

"He painted his brother today." The other Lana told Dean. "I should go help Duncan clean up."

"Let me do it, honey. You've done enough today." Dean said, kissing her softly and then taking Johnny to go and help Duncan to wash off the paint.

I smiled at them. "They seem so happy…I wish I could give Dean that. He wants a home so badly."

Alexian nodded at me. "Anything can happen. You just have to be willing to give things up, and you have to never let your dreams die. Believe in the future—believe in yourself."

"I think I can do that—I'd do anything to get here." I told her.

Alexian smiled. "Then grasp it—hold onto it with everything you have."

"I will." I said triumphantly, and then I found the light fading, and the darkness returning.

xx

When I woke up, I was feeling rather sore and I distinctly smelt hospital. As I tried to move, I realized that the soreness wasn't going to keep me here—I was going to get up and find the others. There was far too much at stake for me to just lie here in a hospital bed and not do anything. Last I remember besides my very vivid dream was getting hit by a car and then getting shot by Chelsea…obviously someone had come and gotten us to a hospital.

"Dean?" I asked out loud, wishing I could gather the strength to talk louder, but I knew it wasn't going to happen. "Who is in here? Shouldn't there be a nurse?"

As no one answered my question, I sat up, cringing the entire way, and then I looked down and saw that I had had some surgery for that bullet. I started to freak out because I was pretty sure I wasn't far along enough in my pregnancy for the baby to survive surgery and anesthetics. I was sore all over, bruised, definitely scraped up, and I'd been cut into…how was my baby?

"No wonder I'm sore." I whispered, standing up and holding onto my IV, walking out of the room with it on its wheely thingy.

It took me a little while to walk down the corridor, and when I got to the room I was looking for, I freaked out a little bit and walked into the room. Dean was in a coma, that much was obvious, and I sat next to him and I took his hand, kissing it softly. I had been pretty certain that Dean had gotten hit with the worst of it, and I needed him to be all right—I needed him to wake up…I needed to talk to a nurse.

"My birth mother, Florence, told me once that talking to people in comas works." I said and then I sighed and shook my head. "But that's probably not what you wanted me to say as the first thing I say to you."

I looked at him for a moment and wiped a tear away before I looked up and saw Sam coming in. He was silent for a good while looking over his brother, but then he looked at me. We made eye contact and I bit my lip, both of us pretty upset, and he knew something…he knew something and I was pretty sure it was a bad kind of something.

"For a moment I thought you were dead." He told me softly.

I nodded slowly. "I had to get out of that room."

"It's probably not good for you to be up and about." Sam said, honestly worried about me and the condition I was in.

"I need to be here with him." I explained to him, and then looked back at Dean. "I lost the baby, didn't I, Sammy."

Sam opened his mouth to say something but a doctor came in and told him that his father was awake, and I looked up and Sam looked back at me. I wanted an answer to my question but it could wait—John was awake and he needed to know how his sons were. Everything going around me was far much more important, and I needed to accept that.

"You want to give him my regards, please?" I asked Sam. "I have one more thing to say before I make my way in there."

"Say it and I'll carry you in there. You don't look like you're walking too well." He told me, swallowing a little.

I nodded and then looked at Dean. "No matter what, Sam and I are going to find a way to get you out of this. We're not going to leave you…I love you."

I leaned over and kissed his forehead and then Sam came over and picked me up, and as I dragged my IV along, he carried me to John's room and I smiled when he looked up and then Sam set me down for a moment. I was standing pretty well it was the moving that was hurting me all over.

"You're looking a little under the weather." John told me and I knew he cared.

Sam nodded at his father. "She had surgery earlier. Something shot her."

"What?" John asked, very concerned.

"Let's not get into it. I'm fine. We need to worry about Dean." I told him, waving off my own problems because right now what mattered was getting Dean out of his coma.

John gave me a look. "What shot you, Lana?"

"Chelsea, now moving onto Dean being in a coma." I said, not wanting to ruin John's hope of having grandkids and needing him to help me save Dean.

Instead of asking about Chelsea again, John looked at Sam and he nodded. After Sam explained everything to him, Sam gave me a look as he was going out to get his Dad some supplies, and I shrugged, cringing a little. John gave me a look as I rested my hand on my stomach and bit my lip so I wouldn't cry—I had to be strong about this…and maybe find that nurse to talk to.

"What?" I asked him as he looked at me.

"Go rest." John said softly. "In your own room."

"But I need to be with Dean." I protested.

John smiled at me. "If you kill yourself in the process of watching over him, when he wakes up he'll blame himself."

"Fine." I puffed out, sighing and then nodding. "I'll go take a nap or something."

"And we'll talk about Chelsea later." John nodded and smiled.

I nodded at him and felt a little defeated. "Fine."

I got up and walked to my room, laying in my hospital bed and lying down on my bed and looking at the ceiling. I reached over and pressed the button for the nurse, taking a deep breath because I really needed to know…was I still pregnant? What happened during the surgery?

"Everything I wanted to tell him I couldn't. Everything I wanted to show him I couldn't. Here I am, shot by Chelsea, possibly miscarried, and then the man I love slips into a coma. What am I supposed to do?" I asked myself and then looked up as the nurse came in. "Hi. I, uh…I was wondering about the surgery…about my baby."

The nurse nodded solemnly. "When you came in, you'd lost a lot of blood. We did everything that we could, but you were slipping away and it came down to you or the baby. Since the father of the baby was in a coma and your only other next of kin was Jennifer on your contact list and Sam, the decision was up to them…we tried to save you both."

"You did what you could." I managed to say, and ran my fingers along my stomach, tears coming out of my eyes.

I had been far too weak to save my baby, and everything the nurse was saying to me was being absorbed, but I was also broken. What if Dean died and I lost _both_ of them in one fell swoop? That demon was going to pay, and I was going to make damn sure of it, that was for certain.

I went to sleep for a little while, waking up to doctors running past my room and I stood up to go see what was going on, Sam running after them too. They went into Dean's room, and started shocking him with defribulators. I had to hide my eyes in Sam's chest, and he held me tightly as the two of us cried. He was slipping away and we couldn't help him…at least not as we were.

"Still no pulse. Clear!" A nurse said.

"No change." The doctor told her. "We'll have to switch to CPR."

Everything seemed so hectic and chaotic, but thankfully, his vitals returned to normal and he was all right, but something was up, I could feel it. There was a presence around Sam and I, and I was pretty certain that there was something bigger going on here. I looked around and then looked back at Dean's body lying there, knowing there was only one thing left for me to do.

"Are you okay?" Sam asked as he walked me to my room.

I shook my head. "No. I don't like to see him there…like that."

Sam nodded at me. "Me neither."

"Can you…can you hold me?" I asked him slowly.

Sam nodded, and wrapped his arms around me, holding me close to him. I felt so safe there in his warm embrace, and I was thankful to him—thankful _for_ him. He was my Sammy and I needed him right then…I also needed John, Dean and Jen…I needed them desperately right then because I was going to lose it.

xx

**Dean's POV**

Seeing Lana so upset like this was kind of breaking my heart. I had woken up in this state of being pretty much dead and I had no idea what was going on, but I knew when I saw what Lana was going through that I had to find a way to pull through this…I couldn't die. I had made her promise never to just up and leave me and regardless of what was going on with her, I was never going to just up and leave her either.

"It's going to be okay, Lan," Sam told Lana as he stroked her hair.

Lana shook her head, face buried in his chest. "You don't know that. This whole thing is like a nightmare…one giant nightmare. First your father is possessed by the demon that killed your mother and he knows me, then Dean almost gets killed and then we get into a car accident and then this. What if I lose him? I can't lost him and the baby all in one day…"

"Yeah, Lan, I know." Sam responded, stroking her hair. "We'll do everything that we can to make sure that Dean makes it through this.

There was a sadness that built up in my chest when I heard about the baby being gone and I wondered suddenly what Lana and I were going to do. I hadn't really been the most supportive about any of this, but I knew that she was going to need me and I was going to have to be there for her. She had wanted this baby—that much I knew—and now because of some accident, it was gone.

It hadn't even been a demon problem either…it was just a car accident and just like that, any future that we had thought was being carved out had been snuffed out. Now Lana was beside herself and I didn't even know what to do. How was I going to fix this?

"I don't know what I would do without you guys…you're my family." Lana told him, making me smile a little bit.

"We think you're our family too…the three of us love you." Sam explained to her and it was the truth—we loved her…me more than Sam and Dad.

Lana nodded into Sam. "And I love the three of you…know that."

xx

**Lana's POV**

With that said, I kissed him softly, and then I rested my forehead to his, enjoying the contact _and_ feeling a little bad and awkward about my lips on his. It wasn't a romantic gesture and we both knew that, but it still never should have happened, I was just distraught. Sam and I both knew I wasn't trying to do anything, but it had still been a mistake.

"Thank you, Sammy. For taking care of me…for helping me through this." I told him, nodding slowly and touching my stomach. "I can't…I can't believe that I lost it. I mean…I didn't even know what it was yet…it was just kind of a baby—_my_ baby. I…I don't want to tell your dad that I lost it, okay? Not yet…I can't do it."

Sam nodded, kissing me swiftly. "Sleep, Lan, and let's not make this thing here a habit."

"Girl Scout's Honor." I said, laying on the bed and closing my eyes to sleep, and then when I woke up the next time, it was to Sam going past my room to Dean's so I got up and followed him. "What are you doing?"

"I think it's time we tried to communicate with him." Sam told me.

I nodded at him because I agreed, and I leaned on the doorframe and began watching from the door as Sam talked to his brother. Mostly I was worried about my own plan, but now if we got to talk to Dean, I was going to be able to ask him to forgive me.

"Hey, um. I think maybe you're around, and if you are, don't make fun of me for this, but, um…but there's one way we can talk." Sam said, pulling out a weegie board.

"His spirit is mocking you." I told Sam with a smile and a laugh, and Sam smiled a little too, and then sat down on the floor and I watched him.

"Dean?" Sam asked. "Dean are you here?"

I watched as he sat there for a while, and then the piece moved and I smiled while Sam laughed with relief. Dean was around—or at least his spirit was—and that meant he was in more trouble than I had thought. At least he hadn't completely moved on though, because his body was still hanging on, so I had to act fast.

"Oh God, it's good to hear from you, man." Sam said aloud to Dean's 'spirit'. "Things haven't been the same without you."

"Damn straight." I muttered with a nod and then the piece began to move again.

Sam focused on the board. "Dean, what? H…U…Hunt? Are you hunting? Dean, it's in the hospital what you're hunting? What are you hunting? What is it?"

We watched as it moved. "The Reaper? Dean…is it after you?"

As the piece moved to the 'yes' on the board, Sam freaked out and wanted to find a way to save Dean so he went to his Dad, while I stayed in the room and sat next to his body. I knew I should probably be using the board to try and talk to him, but if he was in the room and could hear me, then this worked too.

"Now that I know you're around, I know you can hear me. So until Sam gets back, I want you to know something…I love you. I may have said it earlier, but I needed to say it again. This love I have for you isn't going away. I'm in love with you. In love with your pigishness, in love with your hardheadedness, in love with your kindness…I just…I can't lose you. In doing what I want to do next, you might get mad at me, but I need to do this…because I love you…and I can't live without you." I explained to him and then I noticed the weegie board moving and I laughed a little and shook my head. "Okay, so um…do you promise not to hurt me when this is all over?" I asked him.

The piece moved to 'no'.

"Sounds like you, Mr. Stubborn." I said with a sad smile and as I said that, the piece moved around the letters and I smiled. "I know you love me." I whispered and looked up in the general direction I expected him to be. "I love you too…forgive me."

xx

I set myself up in my room as Sam looked through their father's journal for things on Reapers, and then I lay down on my bed and I closed my eyes, but then opened them and reached for my cell phone, calling Jen. In all this time—even with the nurse explaining that she'd contacted her—I hadn't called her and she was my best friend. I hadn't let her know that I was awake, and that I was fine…that Dean was hanging on by a thread.

"Hello?" Jen asked hurriedly.

"Hey, Jen! I realized I hadn't called!" I told her.

"I was wondering where you went to! I've been worried sick! You haven't called in like three days!" She cried.

I nodded at her. "I know, I know. Look, don't freak out, but I need you to come to the hospital. Dean's in a coma and getting chased by a Reaper, and I'm…well I'm…I got out of surgery and now I'm recovering."

There was silence and then I heard a rather angry noise. "What the Hell, Lan? You should have called me far before this! I'm going to be there in a few hours!"

I just nodded and gave her the information before she hung up on me and then I left a note for Sam, because she would call back for directions, but I would be on a different plane of existence—I had to do this spell. Dean meant far too much to me, so I lay there and closed my eyes, chanting the spell under my breath. For a moment I felt disoriented, and then when I looked around I saw my body lying there and I nodded.

"Here goes nothing." I told myself, and then I walked down the hallways and heard a woman speaking.

"It's an honorable death. A warrior's death." She said and I stood in the hallway listening.

Dean scoffed at him. "I think I'll pass on the 72 virgins, thanks. I'm not that into prude chicks, anyways, thanks."

I smiled, knowing he was alive, and a bit at his little joke.

"That's funny. You're very cute." The woman told him with little emotion.

"There's no such thing as an honorable death. My corpse, is gonna rot in the ground, and my family is going to die. No. I'm not going with you. I don't care what you do." Dean said, and I felt myself wanting to go to him, but feeling compelled to listen a little more before I showed myself to him.

She nodded at him. "Well, like you said, there's always a choice. I can't make you come with me. But, you're not getting back in your body, and that's just facts. So yes, you can stay. You'll stay here for years—disembodied, scared. And over the decades, it'll probably drive you mad. Maybe you'll even get violent."

"What are you saying?" Dean asked her.

"Dean, how do you think angry spirits are born? They can't let go, and they can't move on. And you're about to become one—the same thing you hunt." She explained to him.

I walked into the room and looked at him, wanting to cry, and scream, and touch and smile, but I froze. This lady standing next to him must have been the Reaper, and I was worried because I didn't want Dean to die. There had to be _something_ that I could do—I couldn't just roll over and play dead while the man I was in love with died.

"I wasn't expecting you to do this." The Reaper told me.

I ignored her and went over to Dean, kissing him hard on the mouth and then pulling away. What if I really wasn't ever able to be with him again? What if no matter what I did, Dean died? What if I was left without the baby _and_ without Dean?

"I couldn't let you go without that." I said, trying to stop the tears that were coming now. "Not at all."

"Why are you here?" He asked. "You're not dying too, are you?"

I shook my head. "I put myself here because you need me, and I need you."

"Is that what you were talking about?" He asked me, stroking my hair and stepping closer to me.

"Yeah. I knew I could get to this plane. I've tried it before with my parents, but they never let me see them." I explained to him and then I wiped a tear away.

"So you know I'm dying?" Dean asked sadly.

I nodded to him, biting my lip to stop the crying. "Yeah."

Dean held me to him and I tried to be brave, tried to tell myself he needed me to be strong, but I just couldn't bring myself to be strong—I needed him. I'd already lost my beautiful baby and now I was going to lose him too? How was I going to get through this? I knew that it was selfish, and I shouldn't have been thinking about just myself but I had just lost a baby and I had no real time to mourn it yet…how could I mourn a baby _and_ the love of my life?

"You didn't even get to hear the baby's heartbeat." I told him sadly and then decided to make a joke instead of dwelling on the sadness. "You're dying and _still_ not pushing tongue."

Dean chuckled a little, and then we pulled away from each other and I looked at him for a second, and then turned to the woman. It was only fair that I talk to her since she was taking Dean away from me, and if Dean was really dying…I couldn't tell him about the baby being gone.

"Are you the Reaper?" I asked her.

"To Dean I'm Tessa, but yes." She answered me with a nod.

I nodded at her and smiled. "Do you deal with exchanges? Like could you take me in place of him?"

"No." Dean said firmly, shaking his head. "Don't even answer that. She's staying. Lanni…you're staying."

I turned to him. "They need you more than they need me—you can't die."

"Maybe it's time I talked with him. Neither of you should fear death." Tessa said in a soft voice.

I smiled at her sadly. "My parents used to say that, but I just—I always thought Dean and I would have some sort of future together."

Dean smiled and stroked my cheek, cupping my face. "Tessa, can I have a moment with Lana really quick?"

"Sure." She nodded at him, and with that she stepped out of the room, and then he looked at me.

"I was worried about you." He told me.

"You were worried about me? Honey you're the one in the coma." I said, wrapping my arms around his waist and looking up at him.

Dean swallowed. "You got shot."

"And got out of surgery fine." I told him, trying so hard not to lose it.

Dean kissed me softly. "Baby, losing the baby is no reason to sacrifice yourself for me. I'm in love with you too. If I have to go, I want you to know that…and I want you to be able to move on without me. I don't want you to sacrifice yourself for me."

I tried to smile. "That's noble, but Sammy and John _need_ you. You can't leave them now."

"I'm in love with your strength, your sassiness, your stubbornness…and the way you make me feel like I'm a good person. I love you so much it hurts." He said to me, trying to get me to understand that he couldn't let me die.

I was crying now. "Why tell me this, now? Dean, why can't you fight this?"

"Because I'm dying, Lanni. I'm dying and I needed you to know that I would do anything for you. I want to love and protect you always, but sometimes you have to move on." He told me, and he leaned down.

I kissed him, and felt him wrap his arms around me, holding me to him as the kiss deepened. He pushed his tongue into my mouth and I couldn't hold back the tears anymore, thinking about how I may never get to do this anymore. Then his hands roamed along my frame and as his hand traveled up my shirt, he rested his hand right below my breast and we pulled away a little.

"Not to ruin a romantic moment or anything, but you might as well…you won't get to do that again." I told him with a small laugh. "Think of it as something that I'll remember you by."

He chuckled and then kissed me a little more passionately than before, and he rested his hand on my breast, squeezing it softly and then we pulled our lips away. I pressed my forehead to his and closed my eyes, biting my lips and holding back the sobs. I didn't want to lose him…I couldn't lose him…

"I love you." I said softly, kissing him again.

"I love you too." He replied, and he was crying a little, which was breaking me.

I sat in a chair in the room and Dean sat on the hospital bed, looking at me, and then Tessa came in and sat down behind him, running her fingers through his hair as I held onto his hand. I kissed his hand softly as Tessa began to talk to him, and I realized that this was it…these were the last moments that I was going to get to spend with him.

"It's time to put the pain behind you." Tessa told him.

"And go where?" Dean asked her sadly.

She smiled at him. "Sorry. I can't give away the big punch line. Moment of truth. No changing your mind later. So, what's it going to be?"

Dean pondered it a moment and we made eye contact. He was my Dean, and this was our last moment together and all I needed to know about how he felt about me was in his eyes. We didn't need any words, and I knew I was never going to find another man like him as long as I lived. I nodded a little, smiling sadly at him, and then he looked at Tessa softly before the lights began to flicker.

"What are you doing that for?" Dean asked, and then I found myself flickering.

"This can't be good." I said, and found myself waking up in my hospital bed with a start and I looked around. "So did she take him?" I asked myself, trying to get up, but I had used a lot of strength to do that spell. "Get up, Lana! Seriously, now!"

I used what was left of my strength and got up, looking up as Jen came into the room, Kevin following her. I really didn't need this right now because I needed to get to Dean's room and get there now, but Jen had that look on her face and Kevin was always backing her up. So if I was to get out of here, I was going to have to go through Jen first and that _far_ easier said than done—I'd learned that early on in our friendship.

"Kevin…close the door." She told him rather forcefully and Kevin complied as she looked around the room and her eyes flashed with anger. "You did not!"

I swallowed. "I didn't what?"

"Kevin! She used a spell!" Jen cried.

Kevin sighed. "Now you've set her off."

"I what?" I asked him.

Jen looked furious. "You're in for it! Think about it! You just put yourself in danger doing that! Where were you?"

"Dean's dying, Jen." I replied, somewhat calmer than I had expected it to come out. "I needed to see him on his plane before he was taken by Death."

Jen looked phased, but still needed to rant. "Killing yourself is no way to say goodbye!"

"Sit down, Sweetheart." Kevin said softly.

"No! Stop, Kevin!" Jen told him and he sighed.

I took that moment to notice that Jen was looking incredibly happy and for a moment I thought she was even glowing. She couldn't be…pregnant, could she? No, no, of course not—that was something that she would have told me about had she been. She was just pissed at me because I was her best friend and she had been out of the loop…and was that a _wedding band_ on her finger?

"I can't believe this! Why didn't you call earlier? Why didn't Sam call?" Jen asked, but she looked a little sadder now. "I was worried sick! I had no idea what had happened with the demons! I was trying to figure out if I would know if you would die or not, and then you call and lay everything on me! What were you thinking? You weren't!"

I smiled at her sadly. "Jen…I'm sorry."

"You should be!" She cried, actually sobbing now. "I don't know what I would do without you! We've been each others' rock for years and years. I can't lose you."

I started to cry too, and she came over to me and embraced me, and then I cringed a bit and she pulled away. I was still in a lot of pain and I needed to use the last of my strength to hug her _and_ to make sure that Dean was all right now.

"Sorry." She said sincerely.

"Let's check on Dean. I was thrown out of the other plane by something, and all I really remember is finding him and the Reaper, talking to him a bit, and then…then I was here. I need to know if he's alive or not." I told her.

She nodded at me. "Kevin, help me to help her to him."

I smiled at how happy she was to see me and I took a deep breath as I cringed a bit at my wounds. There was just so much bruising and then the site where I had been shot and then cut into and I just…there was so much going on with me right now, but I just had to be with Dean. The three of us went to Dean's room as some doctor's were clearing out, and then I prepared for the worst, but saw Dean sitting up.

"What?" I asked aloud.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" Dean asked me.

I nodded at him and sat on the bed, stroking his hair. "That's not the point…how are _you_?"

"I'm fine." He said and then Sam asked him what happened. "I don't remember."

I nodded slowly—he didn't remember…none of it. That meant that he didn't remember any of the confessions to me either and while that meant that he and I could no longer be in that area of caring and sharing, it meant that I knew exactly how he felt even if he didn't say it. The look on my face made Sam and Dean ponder things, and then I sat in a chair and I looked up as they noticed Jen and Kevin for the first time.

"Oh! Hi you guys!" Sam told them.

"Hey, Sam. You need to watch Lana a bit more closely. I mean sure, you needed to be here for Dean, but she did a spell." Jen said and I rolled my eyes as she ratted me out.

Sam and Dean turned to me and Sam sighed. "In your weakened state?"

"Lanni…" Dean began, but I shook my head.

"There was a Reaper after you." I told him.

"What?" Dean asked.

I nodded at him. "Then I did the spell to get myself on the same plane as you."

"Lan, that was dangerous." Sam rubbed his temples. "You're not in any state to be going around doing spells."

"I needed to do it." I shrugged. "I got there when Dean was talking to the Reaper, and then…then the two of us talked a bit, and then I was thrown back into this plane. Something went down, but I don't know what."

I was about to say something else when the doctor came in and stood by his bed.

"I can't explain it. The Edema's vanished. The internal contusions are healed. Your vitals are good. You got to have some kind of angel watching over you." He told Dean.

"Thanks, Doc." Dean said.

The doctor nodded and then he looked over at me. "Shouldn't you be in bed, Ms. Tunston?"

I smiled a little. "Just checking on them."

"Hurry the visit up and get back in your bed." He told me. "You should be resting."

"Don't worry, we're on it." Jen said, and then the doctor nodded and left the room, Dean turning to Sam.

"So there was a Reaper after me?" He asked aloud and we all nodded. "Then how did I ditch it?"

Sam looked at me and when I shrugged so did he. "Beats me. You really don't remember anything?"

"No." Dean replied. "I just feel something in the pit of my stomach. Something's wrong."

Then there was a knock on the door and their father came in, looking at his boy with love in his eyes but Dean was right about one thing—something was wrong. Sam was going to fight with him, but John didn't want to…there was _definitely _something going on with him. He sent Sam to get him caffeine, and then the rest of us left the room because he wanted to talk to Dean alone.

I was really hoping that Sam had kept my secret and not told his father about anything, and I leaned on the doorframe of Dean's hospital room, not listening to what they were saying. I was giving them their privacy but at the same time I had come so close to losing Dean that I really just needed to be near him. This whole day had been trying, and we had all been through so much, and I really just needed something happy to happen.

When John came out of the room, he looked rather solemn, and I took his hand in mine and he smiled a sad smile. Something was up with him and I wanted to know what that something was…but was it my place to pry? I wasn't sure if I should or not, but at the same time…he meant so much to me and I wanted him to be happy too.

"Lana, I want you to know that I love you, okay?" John told me.

"What did you do, Dad?" I asked him without thinking about it, and he turned to me, smiling a sad smile.

He reached out and stroked my hair. "You called me 'Dad'."

I nodded and hugged him. "That's the way I love you—like my own father. You've honestly been the only one I've had in a really long time, and you love me like part of the family."

"I do—you're pretty much my daughter-in-law, you know?" He told me with a smile. "I love you, Lana. I want you to stay strong. I want you to do what you do best: follow your gut. Love them. Love yourself…find your mother."

"You're leaving aren't you?" I asked him, the tears coming. "I'm going to miss you."

He kissed my forehead. "I'm going to miss you too, Lana."

He kissed my forehead one more time and then he headed down the hall and I looked in on Dean, going back into his room as he looked up at me. Jen and Kevin showed back up as I got onto the bed with Dean and started to cry a little as he rested his hand on my stomach. He didn't remember anything so he didn't have any idea about the miscarriage and I didn't have the heart to tell him about it right then because for the first time he was stroking my stomach.

There was no way I could keep it from him, but I was too mentally, emotionally and physically exhausted to get into it. I laid my head on Dean's chest and listened to his heartbeat, kissing his shirted peck softly and hoping I would never be stuck in this life or death situation like this with him again. If it came down to it, I would give my life for him, and I would do that in a heartbeat.

"Are you sure you're all right, Lanni? You just seem so sad." Dean told me.

I looked up in his eyes and kissed him. "I can't talk about it right now, Baby. You sure _you're_ okay?"

He nodded at. "Yeah…I'll be fine—I promise I'm not leaving you any time soon."

I nodded and kissed him again, smiling a little when he stroked my hair, both of us pulling away when we heard Sam yelling for help. The two of us scrambled up and hurried out of the room, followed closely by Jen and Kevin to see John. The doctors were in his room with him trying hard to save his life with defribulators, and compressions, and I wasn't sure I could handle anymore loss…and I broke down when they stopped…

"Okay. Stop compressions. I'll call it. Time of death 10:41 a.m." The doctor said.

**Note: What a way to start of 'Season Two', right? More to come tomorrow, don't worry about it. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	2. Coping and Clowns

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Sorry for all of the sadness I've put you through! Here is the next chapter and there is still _some _sadness, sorry. I promise that next chapter will have more comedy, even with the slight sadness.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence, and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

After John passed, we ended up heading to Bobby's and he gave us all a place to stay—except Jen and Kevin who went back to Kansas. Turns out the day Kevin was kidnapped, he and Jen got married but when he went missing, she didn't tell anyone about it. Then he came back and she wasn't sure the two of them would actually stay together and then she found herself talking to Kevin about the possibility of having kids and settling down completely and they seemed…happy.

Honestly, I was fine with that—she had a lot to deal with—even though part of me still wished she had told me about it all. I had other things to be upset about though…John was dead, I'd lost my baby, and I still hadn't told Dean. How could I do that to him? Each time I went to tell him he said something about how he was glad he hadn't lost everything…in all reality he had lost half of the people he cared the most about.

I sat in a room at Bobby's and I hugged my knees to me, sitting in shock, my tears streaming down my face, but no one knew I was crying…no one was there. Even when people were around I tried to keep my sadness to myself, even though I was visibly the most broken out of Sam, Dean and I. How were the three of us going to make it through this? How were we going to manage?

"I miss you, John." I told the empty room. "I miss you so much."

I wiped my tears away when I heard the door open, and I quickly flipped up the laptop and pretended to be fine as Sam and Dean walked through the door. They weren't really paying attention to me because they were engaged in their own conversation, and so I blotted my eyes as discretely as possible. Besides, I was used to this since we were all sharing the same room.

"I just never thought about her like that." Sam was saying.

Dean shrugged a little. "Well now we know she had a lot going on."

"I meant I never saw her truly settling down. I mean she's married and thinking about kids and I think that's great but we met her, thinking she was just another hunter and hunters don't really get happy endings. I dunno… I guess it was just easier to accept with Lana." Sam told him, and I knew they were referring to Jen.

"That's only because she was so adamant about not being with me, and you assume every girl with me is easy." Dean said with a shake of his head.

Sam nodded his head. "Exactly—Lana is not easy."

"Not at all." I told them, starting an e-mail to Jen.

"You okay?" Dean asked, sitting down on the bed and handing me a latte.

I nodded at him slowly. "Yeah…I, uh…did you know that they're seriously thinking about trying for a baby right now? Jen and Kevin?"

I got off of the bed as Dean's hand started to move towards my stomach and Sam swallowed, knowing this was painful for me. Dean made a face and I tried to give him a smile as I crossed my arms over my chest. I was definitely having a hard time with all of this and I wanted Dean to know without me blurting because I couldn't take it anymore—I had to tell him with _some_ tact.

"Do you wanna talk about it?" Sam asked me after a pause.

I shook my head. "No. I just want to…I want to wake up from this nightmare."

They nodded, and then Dean got up and he and Sam grabbed some things because we were going to give John a hunter's funeral. It was going to be hard to watch as he burned, but it had to be done so he wouldn't come back as anything. Still…it seemed so cold and I had no idea if I was going to be able to get through it without breaking down again. John Winchester was really gone…he was really not coming back…

"I'm going to grab my jacket." I told them, and headed out of the room before either of them could ask me anything.

We stood there in the dark air watching John's body burn. No one wanted him to come back as a spirit or anything, and I couldn't take it all, just like I thought I couldn't. I stood in silence a little bit off by myself, not wanting to deal with the sadness that was coming off of Sam and Dean in waves. I didn't want to deal with this…not at all.

For the next couple days, Dean worked on his car, Sam walked around, and I just lounged around in silence. I hadn't spoken since we burned John…it wasn't worth it. There was no point in talking about any of it, and no point getting Sam down or bothering Dean while he tried to fix his baby because of the crash. Still, it was the day I was going to tell Dean about the baby.

I hadn't planned it, but I had been taking a shower and my fingers ran along my scar and I couldn't stand anymore—I sat down in the tub and hugged my knees to me. I decided to just run a bath instead, but only sat in the water, Dean coming into the bathroom after knocking on the door a few times. He was worried about me, and he became even more worried when he shut the door behind him and noticed me in the tub with tears streaming down my face. Yeah…it was an incredibly disconcerting position and it was apparently the way that this talk was just going to go.

"Lanni…" Dean told me, reaching out and stroking my wet hair. "Baby, please talk to me…please…"

I sniffled a little and closed my eyes. "I lost it, Dean."

I shook my head a little as he got into the tub fully clothed, and resituated us so that our torsos were touching, my legs draped over his and wrapped around him. He stroked my hair and kissed my forehead as I cried and held me protectively close, brushing his lips across mine. He didn't know what to say and neither did I, but I had to let it all out since we were here, and once I started, I couldn't stop it.

"When we got hit by the semi, I got out of the car and I tried to make sure that everyone was okay and went to dial 9-1-1 for an ambulance. Then Chelsea showed up and she shot me, and I passed out. My body was going through too much and I just…they contacted Jen and they talked to Sam and after a while it was me…or the baby." I told him, trying to contain the sobs. "I wasn't strong enough to withstand anything! I lost _our_ baby and it's all my fault!"

Dean shook his head. "No, Baby, it's not. Hey…Lanni…look at me."

"Dean, I—"

"—things like this happen, Lanni. You can't blame yourself for _any_ of it." Dean told me, nuzzling my nose with his until I looked him in the eye.

I swallowed and then I sighed a little. "I didn't want to say anything because you already have so much to deal with."

"Baby, you can't handle this all on your own…it was my baby too." Dean said, and rested his forehead against mine. "You need to keep me in the loop here, Lanni. I mean I'm still trying to wrap my head around you having powers and I just…I need you to be honest with me—I need you to tell me things. I need you…can you let me in, please?"

I nodded and returned the kiss he placed so pleasantly on my lips and then he took off his t-shirt and kissed me again. It was nice to just kiss him back, our skin touching and know that we weren't going to actually go at it in the tub. We just needed to be close to each other, and I was so grateful for him—so glad that he was alive and with me.

"I'm so sorry." I told him softly.

He shook his head. "I love you."

"I know."

"Good."

I nodded as some more tears came, kissing him again and wrapping my arms around him, both of us eventually getting untangled from each other and me finishing my shower. Then the two of us got dressed and spent the next couple of days doing our own thing, and still being as close to each other as possible at night, snuggled close, Dean keeping me protected in his arms. I slipped back into silence, and Sam really wanted to talk to Dean about what was going on, but Dean didn't want to talk about his father…not even to me…in fact besides telling me that he was sorry he hadn't told me how much he wanted the baby, he didn't talk about the baby either.

That particular day, I was lounging about in jeans and a tight red t-shirt, my hair pulled back into a pony-tail, my bangs kind of annoying me as I read, but I pretty much left them alone. Dean was under the car trying to fix things, and Sam came over and they started arguing about how they were handling everything differently, and then Sam told Dean he had an address of a woman who might be able to help.

"Well, ask Bobby if we can borrow one of his cars." Dean told him, trying not to fight with his brother while he was upset.

"You coming, Lan?" Sam asked me.

I looked over at them and nodded, standing up from my seated position on the ground, and dusting myself off, nodding slowly again to reassure them of my decision—and to reassure myself. Lately the three of us were just kind of dealing with John's death in our own ways, and no one really talked about babies in front of me, so we side-stepped that too. It would be good to go on a hunt and get everyone to try and get back into the swing of things.

"You sure you don't want to talk a—" Sam began, but I held up my hand and he dropped it, nodding at me.

When we asked Bobby, he gave us keys to a van, and I got into the backseat, buckling up and looking out the window. It was kind of hard to think about how life was going to be now, and I wished that I could feel better with just a thought, but I couldn't. We had to deal with a lot of death in a really concentrated amount of time, and I was fairly certain that once the hunt was over we'd all go back to being upset and grouchy with each other.

"Lan, you can talk to us if you want to." Sam said as he got into the passenger seat.

"She doesn't want to talk, Sammy." Dean told him calmly. "Let her be."

Ignoring him Sam said, "Lan, it might make you feel better if you talk about it."

I turned to look at him as he looked back at me, and he sighed, knowing my eyes said it all: I'm not talking about it, and that's final. Every time I opened my mouth to try and talk through my feelings I became a water fountain and we were trying to do something here. I just wanted to lose myself in something else, and as we pulled up to the Roadhouse, I smiled a little as Dean and the car weren't getting along real well.

"This is humiliating! I feel like a freakin' soccer mom!" He said, slamming the car door and then reached out to stroke my hair and tell me he was sorry—the joke was funny until his 'sorry' reminded me of children.

"It's the only car Bobby had running." Sam told him.

As the boys tried to figure out if anyone was around, I put my hands in my back pockets and I looked at the old saloon. It wasn't too inviting, but I followed them in and at first I noticed someone on a table, and then there was a blonde woman with a gun, but I couldn't find my voice.

"God I hope that's a rifle." Dean said as the woman put it to his back. "You know you really shouldn't put a rifle to someone's back, makes it real easy for them to do this."

With that, Dean whirled around and took the rifle from her, but she punched him in the face hard and he called for Sam, who was being led out by someone else with a gun, and told Dean he couldn't help him. We seemed pretty out-gunned by two women, and it made me smile a little as I walked over to Sam and Dean and took a breath, trying to look really not hostile at all.

"Sam? Dean? Winchester?" The lady holding the gun to Sam asked.

"Yeah," Dean said, holding his nose.

The lady smiled a little. "Son of a bitch."

"Mom, you know these guys?" The girl asked, glaring at me too.

"I think these are John Winchester's boys." She replied, and then she laughed. "Hey, I'm Ellen. That's my daughter Jo."

They lowered their weapons and Dean turned to Jo. "You're not gonna hit me again are ya?"

"You must be Lana, then—Dean's girl." Ellen said, looking me over.

I nodded slowly and Dean responded, "Yeah, my Lana."

Ellen's eyes lit up when she heard my name and I realized that she _too_ knew who I was and I was pretty certain I wasn't going to be happy about what she knew too. Why was it that everyone seemed to know me or know _about_ me, but I didn't know them? What was it about me that made everyone so interested in me?

"It's nice to finally put a face to the stories." Ellen told me and I sadly looked at her funny and the smile was wiped away. "Don't you speak? As I remember, John said you had quite the mouth."

"She hasn't spoken lately." Sam said with a small nod.

With a nod from Ellen, we followed her and she got Dean some ice for his nose, and then they started talking about the help she said she could give John on the message she left on his phone. When she figured out he hadn't sent them, she asked if he was all right, and the tears welled up. I walked away from them a bit and kept my back turned trying hard not to lose it…I really didn't want to lose it yet again.

"It was the Demon, we think. It just got him before he got it, I guess." Sam explained to her as calmly as he could.

"I'm so sorry." Ellen said after a pause and I crossed my arms and then wiped away some fallen tears, trying hard to stay collected.

Dean nodded at her. "It's okay. We're all right."

"Really, I know how close you and your Dad—" Ellen began.

"Look, lady, I'm fine." Dean told her firmly and it broke my heart because I knew he wasn't _trying_ to be rude—he just hurt so much over the loss of his father.

"Are you okay?" She asked, and I knew she was talking to me.

I turned to her and nodded, and then I left the saloon because I didn't want to talk about John. I wanted to help, but I didn't want to look like a complete and utter insensitive jerk. So I took a few moments to collect my thoughts, and then I walked in as Ash, the man who was sleeping on the table when we came in, walked away with some of John's research, and I knew that he was getting ready to track the demon down.

Dean walked over to me and put his hands on my shoulders. "Hey, Baby…are you sure you want to be here right now?"

I just nodded at him, smiling a little when he leaned in to kiss me because I hadn't been expecting it. He'd been so incredibly attentive lately, and I really just wanted to show him that I wasn't _entirely_ broken, but I _felt_ entirely broken so that was hard. Still, I kissed him back slow and sweet, pulling back and nuzzling his nose with mine, smiling at him and sending him off to his brother when he called him, noticing Jo's look in my direction.

It was obvious that she was kind of into Dean from the look that she gave me, but she also respected me for some reason. Besides, I had nothing to worry about because I knew Dean wasn't going to stray from me…I knew he was in love with me. He hadn't actually told me that he was in love with me the way he had when he was dying and we were with Tessa, but I knew it from how supportive he'd been being and the fact that he had told me that himself—he just didn't remember that.

So I just nodded a little and headed over to Sam and Dean, smiling a small smile genuinely when Dean reached out and rested his hand on my back as I stood next to him. He really did love me and care about me, and I suddenly felt incredibly selfish being so mopey and so unable to contain my pain when that was all Dean was doing—hiding his sadness. I really needed to make this up to him, so I started off by running my fingers through Dean's hair, massaging his scalp with my fingertips and stepping closer to him as he sat on the bar stool, him showing me the papers and I looked him in the eye and nodded—he knew I wanted to take the case.

"You do?" Dean asked me and I nodded again. "Okay then."

He was confused that I wanted to take the hunt when it had to do with children, but I just needed to get out and do something. It was going to be hard, and it was going to open up some pretty fresh wounds, but I needed to do this so we got into the car and started to drive in the dark as it rained. It wasn't until I actually read over the rest of the papers that I realized what had killed the little girl's parents—a clown…I was _not_ good with clowns and I let out a small shriek and Sam turned to me.

"What?" He asked me, but I just tried to wave it off and he nodded.

Dean made a face. "You have got to be kidding me. A killer clown?"

As I stared at the paper, Dean and Sam had a little spat about whether it was more normal to be afraid of flying or clowns, and then I handed the paper to Sam and texted a message to Jen, who was in Kansas again, with Kevin. She was going to be kept nice and safe by him—that was the plan—and I was glad that she was really safe. I wanted Jen to have an actual life and someday make me a Godmother and pop out healthy, adorable babies.

"You sure you're going to be okay, Lan?" Sam asked looking back at me. "I just worry when you're quiet."

He and Dean had just finished a conversation about how Sam was doing this case because John would have wanted them to do it, and I looked up at him, and shrugged. I wanted to talk and they were being supportive, so it was about time I stopped moping around and started to think about Sam and Dean. Just because I had been led astray about my future didn't mean I had a right to think I was the worse off here. They had just lost their _father_…why was I being so selfish about this?

"You can always tell us anything." Dean said, and I nodded.

"I hate clowns too." I told him after a long pause. "Terrified since I was 6."

Sam smiled a little. "So why did _you_ want to do this? It's children _and_ clowns."

"It's bad enough losing a child, but these children are losing their parents brutally, I just…I want to help them. I haven't helped anyone in what seems like a long, long time and I need to do this—for everyone." I said and then I swallowed. "Please don't make me…I can't talk without everything hurting."

"Lan, I'm sorry." Sam told me, reaching back and grasping my hand as Dean looked back in the rearview mirror and smiled sadly.

I just waved it off and wiped away a fallen tear. "It's okay I'm just going to nap."

xx

I woke up to Dean running his fingers along my arms and I smiled up at him, sitting up and resting my head on his shoulder. He stroked my cheek softly and kissed me, his lips lingering against mine even when the kiss ended. I kissed his hand and smiled again, resting my forehead against his.

"Why are you being so sweet?" I asked him.

He shrugged a little. "I can't be sweet?"

"Thank you." I told him, and kissed him swiftly before I got out of the car and looked at Sam. "More murders?"

"Yeah." Sam replied and then shuddered. "Good thing you got to sleep…clown walked by."

"Didn't need to know," I told him, hugging myself.

"We need to blend in." Dean said, and I followed his eyes to a 'help wanted' sign.

I shook my head. "Fuck no."

"It's for the kids, Lanni." Dean said with a little laugh. "I promise I won't let them make you dress up as a clown. No balloon animals either!"

"Very funny," I said rolling my eyes, then I looked at him, then the sign, then Sam, and then back to Dean, closed my eyes, and sighed. "Fine…for the kids."

Sam and Dean nodded and then I followed him into a tent where a man was throwing knives. I looked around and felt a little uneasy in the tent, but at the same time I was trying not to make something out of what could be nothing. So I smiled and let Dean take the reins on this one since he had more to cope with than I did, and a hunt would do him some good.

"Excuse me we're looking for Mr. Cooper. Have you seen him around?" Dean asked the man.

"What is that, some kind of joke?" The man asked angrily, taking off his sunglasses to show he was blind.

Dean swallowed and made a face. "Oh, God, I'm sorry."

"You think I wouldn't give my eyeteeth to see Mr. Cooper, or a sunset, or anything at all?" The man asked.

Dean turned to Sam and me. "Want to give me a little help here?"

"Not really." Sam said as I shook my head and Dean turned back to the man, slightly annoyed, smiling an annoyed smile.

"Hey Barry, is there a problem?" A little man asked.

"Yeah, this guy hates blind people." Barry said as the three of us turned to see the man that had just come in.

"No, I don't." Dean said laughing awkwardly, turning to Barry again.

The man looked upset. "Hey Buddy, what's your problem?"

"Nothing, it was just a little misunderstanding." Dean told him.

"Little? Son of a bitch." The man said, coming at Dean with something.

"No! No! No! Could someone tell me where Mr. Copper is? Please?" Dean asked in a desperate voice as Sam and I laughed.

They ended up helping us even after being upset with Dean, and we went to see Mr. Cooper and Dean looked a bit frazzled, and I put my hands in my back pockets. None of us were really happy about being here, but we were going to see this through and that was just the way that it was.

"You guys picked a Hell of a time to join up. Take a seat." Mr. Cooper told us.

Dean immediately went for the regular chair, leaving Sam or I the clown chair. Sam motioned to me but I shook my head—I would rather stand then sit in that thing. It was childish, sure, but clowns creeped me out and I sure as Hell wasn't going to _sit_ on one…fake or not.

"You want my chair, Little Lady?" Mr. Cooper asked me with that creepy old man smile.

I shook my head and plastered a smile on my face. "That's okay."

"She can sit here." Dean said, patting his knee.

At first I was going to get him back for what he was doing to Sam by sitting on Sam's lap, but that would push his body closer to the clown and that would be just plain cruel. So I sat on Dean's lap and set in to telling Mr. Cooper about how much we wanted to be there and how we just needed a new circus to be at. Unfortunately Mr. Cooper could see right through our lie about working in a circus before, and told us a little story about his father and how he used to run a freak show until he was shut down, and the people that toured with him rotted in hospitals and asylums.

"You guys should go to school. Get married. Have 2.5 kids." He told us after a little while. "Live regular."

"Sir…we don't want to go to school. We don't want regular. We want this." Sam told him, leaning forward a bit, making me shift.

I nodded and found the words just spilling out. "Besides, I can't have kids. This is something different. Something that makes us feel like we're doing something good. Normal is overrated."

Mr. Cooper nodded and gave us the job, and then we walked out of his office and I stood there in silence as Dean and Sam talked about school. Sam was having second thoughts about going back because he thought their Dad would have wanted him to stay with the job, and Dean was having issues because Sam spent half his life doing what John didn't want. Then he walked off in a huff and I grabbed Sam's hand, both of us quite aware that as much as Dean wanted to ask me about my little slip-up about the kids, he was more pissed about Sam and about John.

"He's dealing with it in his own way. Let him be for a bit." I whispered to Sam.

Sam turned to me and nodded. "I know. Lana? Are you _really_ okay? You looked so damn sad when you mentioned not being able to have kids anymore and the only reason I know you can't is because the nurse told me after they stabilized you after the surgery…have you told Dean?"

"How do I do that, Sammy?" I asked him honestly. "How do I tell him that I wanted that baby _so_ much, and that all I want is to have babies with him but I can't? I…I mean _I'm_ still in a bit of denial about it."

Sam nodded and kissed my forehead to let me know he was there for me. "Together we'll be fine, Lan."

xx

We were working as trash collectors in reddish suits, and I sighed as I called Jen. I really liked being in constant contact with her after everything, and since I was finally talking again, I knew she deserved to hear my voice. I'd been keeping contact via text and e-mail, and she certainly deserved _so_ much more than that.

"Finally, you're talking. What got you to do that?" Jen asked as she picked up the phone.

"We're doing a case about killer clowns." I told her as I made a face.

She laughed a little. "Oh I bet you're _loving_ that."

"Sam and I are not keen on it at all actually—both a little jumpy, but not finding anything." I explained and sighed. "Earlier I was getting some irky feelings, but I dunno if it's just me being paranoid or not, you know?"

"I can do some research if you want." She said and I knew she was looking for something to do since she wasn't really used to the whole 'settling down' prospect.

I shook my head though. "No, that's okay. I just wanted to check in. Hey…how is Kevin adjusting?"

There was a small pause and then Jen spoke up. "He's okay I think—me having powers like you is kind of…overwhelming to him. My mother and your biological one were both in a tight knit group of witches—they had powers and we got those powers. He's…he wishes I had told him sooner because our kids might have powers too. It's another hurdle to get over and maybe we should have discussed it before starting to try for kids."

"Yeah, I was pretty sure that was going to be the toughest thing for Dean to swallow…seeing as how I haven't come clean about my father and I never plan to." I told her and then heard the familiar beep in my ear. "Hey…Dean is calling on the other line. I'll call you back, okay?"

"Okay. Just help me out…being stuck here forever…so not fun." She said, exaggerating the sentence.

I smiled. "I know. Love you…bye, Jenny."

"Bye. Love you too." She told me.

"Hello?" I asked, switching over.

"Sam and I think we found a girl who saw a disappearing clown." Dean said when he knew I was on the other line.

I nodded at that. "So we should follow the family home."

"Meet you out front?" He asked me.

"As soon as they look like they're getting ready to leave, call me." I replied.

Dean agreed with me on that so we hung up with each other and I continued to do my new 'job' until Dean called me later. Then I met up with him and Sam up front and we tailed the family—I _definitely_ didn't want another child losing its parents. It was bad enough that there were clowns behind it all, but clowns hurting children's lives? That just wasn't going to fly with me.

"How long do you think we'll have to wait?" I asked them. "I need to check in with Jen."

Sam turned to me. "I don't know. Dean, I can't believe you told him that we were writing a novel about a story of a killer clown."

"I told him an urban legend about a killer clown." Dean corrected him. "Hey! Get this. I mentioned the thing about the Bunker Brothers in '81, and before Mr. Cooper worked for the Cooper Carnival, he worked for the Bunker Brothers."

"So you think whatever happened, he brought the spirit with him?" Sam asked him as I took that information in.

Dean shrugged. "Something like that."

We sat there in the car waiting for the clown to show up, and Dean drifted off to sleep, but Sam and I were on our guard. We were not going to be outsmarted or jumped by a clown—not a chance. Then we saw the lights go on and the little girl walking around, and so Sam shook Dean and he woke up with a start, looking at the house as the girl opened the door.

We went in and shot at the clown with rock salt, but nothing happened the way it would happen if the clown were a ghost, and the parents came and we got out of there, ditching the van and walking down the street. Luckily it was broad daylight, but the duffles were kinda heavy and Sam and Dean yelled about dealing with their father's death in a different way, and Dean hurt Sam's feelings.

"Don't get all Maudlin on me man." Sam said, as he was about to call Ellen.

Dean gave Sam a look. "What do you mean?"

"I mean this strong, silent thing, of yours, its crap!" Sam pointed out.

"Oh, God." Dean replied with an eye-roll.

"I'm over it! This isn't just anybody we're talking about! This is Dad! I know how you felt about the man." Sam protested, trying to get Dean to open up about it.

Dean gave Sam another look. "Back off, all right. Just because I'm not caring and sharing like you want me to—"

"—No, no, no—this isn't what this is about Dean. I don't care how you deal with this, man, but you have to deal with this, Dean." Sam said forcefully, and I sighed as I walked in silence behind them, and Dean's head cocked a little. "Listen, I'm your brother all right, and I just want to make sure that you're okay."

"Dude, I'm okay!" Dean shouted at him. "I'm okay! I swear the next person who asks me if I'm okay, I'm gonna start throwing punches. These are your issues, quit dumping them on me."

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked and they stopped after I did, facing each other as I searched for the words to say.

"I just think it's really funny, this sudden obedience to Dad. It's all like, 'What would Dad want me to do?' Sam, you spent your entire life slugging it out with the man! Hell, you picked a fight with him the last time that you saw him! And now he's dead, so now you want to make it right?" Dean was saying angrily as Sam's face changed to that of hurt. "Well I'm sorry, Sam, but you can't! It's too little, too late!"

"Why are you saying these things to me?" Sam asked in a sad voice as I closed my eyes to what Dean had just said.

Dean whirled on him. "Because I want you to be honest with yourself about this! I'm dealing with Dad's death! Are you?"

There was a long silence between all of us because we were all hurting and we couldn't seem to talk it out with each other without getting on each other's cases about it. Sam and Dean were both hurting, and both dealing in their own ways, and I couldn't get in the middle of it, but at the same time I really _hated_ seeing them fight, and as I began to walk up to them, Sam spoke up.

"I'm gonna call Ellen." Sam said, trying hard not to be hurt, but he was.

"Can we…just not fight here?" I asked them both.

Sam and Dean just walked along, and I knew Dean felt bad about what he said but he wasn't going to take it back. Tensions were high and emotions were swirling around all over the place making us all run our mouths and do things we probably never would have done before. I swallowed as Sam called Ellen, and then I put my hand on Dean's shoulder and he stopped to turn to me.

"How come you aren't dealing with it? Normally you're the one telling us we're hiding something." Dean said before I could say anything on the subject. "You're normally the one holding all of us together and right now I kind of miss that, Lanni—I miss it a lot because me and Sam yelling at each other is just…its…"

"I'm dealing with this the same way I dealt with my parent's death at first: thinking about the good memories, thinking about how much I loved him, and how much he loved me. Thinking about every wonderful thing he did, and then the thoughts about never seeing him again come in, and I have a silent cry." I admitted to him, putting my hands in my pockets. "I just—I can't talk about it all yet. I'm having enough trouble as it is trying to talk about losing the baby and it just…it's not that time for me. Dean, please don't—I don't want a hug. It will make the tears I'm keeping at bay right now, come out." I added as he opened his arms a little bit.

He nodded, and then Sam spoke up before Dean could say anything and we began to walk on again. We found out it had to be a Rakshasa—they took on a human form, fed on human flesh, could make themselves invisible, and could only enter houses if invited. That meant that it took the form of a clown so the children would let it in so it could kill the kid's parents…I was surprised that Sam and Dean were being civil after all of that.

"They sleep on a bed of dead insects?" I asked Sam as he explained some more.

Sam nodded to me. "And every 20 to 30 years they come out again."

"Did Ellen say what could kill it?" Dean asked him.

"Legend goes a dagger made of brass." Sam said.

Dean nodded and pondered it. "I think I know where we can get those."

"Cooper worked both carnivals." I added to them, trying to piece it all together, but not entirely certain that it was Cooper behind it all.

"That picture of his father…it looked just like him." Sam agreed with a small nod.

Dean looked at him. "You think it was him?"

"I dunno. Who knows how old he is?" Sam asked him with a shrug.

"Good point, but…let's not go kill random guys, okay?" I said with a small laugh.

Sam nodded in agreement. "Before we go stabbing things into Cooper, we better make damn sure it's him."

We agreed even after Dean made a remark about Sam being a stickler for details and decided splitting up was the best option. Dean would get the blade while Sam and I tried to figure out if Cooper had bed bugs.

xx

As Sam and I went into Cooper's 'room' that night, I looked around to see if it gave off any vibe, but it didn't. Then Sam went for the bed with a knife and I turned to him because I really didn't want to be there but I needed him to know I was in this hunt until the end. This was important—it was saving people and that was what we were about…we were hunters and we put everyone else above ourselves even when things were tough like they were now—_especially_ when things were tough.

"Honey, let's get this done quickly, please." I told him as I sensed someone near us, needing to pick a character to fall back on.

Then we heard a gun cock, and we turned to see Copper pointing a gun at us. "What are you doing?"

"We were just looking for—" I began.

"—you want to do those kinds of things you do them in your own place. Not mine." Cooper told us with a stern look on his face.

"That's not—" Sam began, but I took his hand.

"No, it's fine. We get it. Sorry. We get carried away sometimes. Let's go, Honey." I told Sam, dragging him along.

Sam just shut his mouth and we hurried out, both of us glad not to be in _too_ much trouble and honestly it was kind of funny. Copper that we were complete horn dogs, and it was actually a pretty damn good cover if I do say so myself. I mean Sam and I weren't like that in any way, but it had worked and it hadn't been the first nor last time it would.

Sam looked at me. "That was…weird."

"Not like we haven't been mistaken for a couple before." I told him with a small laugh. "Just not a couple that couldn't keep their hands to themselves…"

"Very true," Sam replied and laughed with me. "It at least kept us pretty under the radar."

I nodded with him in agreement and we went to look for Dean, which wasn't so hard when he came running. He wasn't necessarily coming for us, but he looked a little spooked so we knew that something was up and hurried over to him.

"Hey!" Sam said.

"Hey." Dean told him.

Sam looked at Dean hard. "Well Cooper thinks we're peeping toms, but it's not him."

"Yeah, I kind of gathered." Dean said, looking around him. "It's the blind guy, he's around here somewhere."

"You get the—" Sam began.

"—brass knives? No. It's just been one of those days." Dean replied angrily.

He wasn't angry with Sam, he was just angry in general because it really _had_ been one of those days. None of us were really on the top of our games, but it honestly made me feel a _little_ better because my feelings from before around him had been accurate…I just needed to be more focused on the hunt than on my damn feelings and save people.

"I have an idea." Sam said after a pause and as they began to take off for the Fun House I shook my head.

"No!" I called after them. "No! I hate Fun Houses more than clowns!"

"Lanni, come on! This is no time to freak out!" Dean said as I came towards them.

I gave him a look. "It's the perfect time to freak out! You're suggesting heading into a scary, cramped place to fight an invisible guy that could kill us!"

Dean kissed me and told me he'd protect me and when I went to say something cheeky about how kissing me wasn't going to make it better, he kissed me again…and I caved. I couldn't help it, and when we got into the Fun House, Sam and I were separated from Dean, but we found some brass organ pipes which would at least help in the long run.

"Those could work." I told Sam.

Sam began to tug on them as Dean found us, and then the invisible man showed up, but we couldn't see him as he threw knives at us…I guess cause he was, I dunno, _INVISIBLE_. Dean got an arm pinned to the wall, but the knives only went through his shirt, and as Sam tugged, I tried to figure out a way to sense him—he kept moving.

"He's moving too much, I can't pin point—Dean, above you. Pull the lever so the steam whirls around." I ordered him.

As he did that, the steam began to fill the room and then Dean saw the shadow as I finally pinpointed his location. In my emotional state of mind, it was really best not to use my powers, but I really needed to start embracing who I was. We were that much closer to taking him out and getting things back to—well as normal as they could be around here—and I whirled around as Dean's eyes widened.

"Sam! Sam, behind you!" Dean and I cried.

Sam turned around, and as he stabbed the Rakshasa with the brass pipe, Dean pulled the knife out of the wall, and the Rakshasa died as I smiled a bit. The steam began to clear as Dean put the lever back, and we looked at the remains.

"I hate Fun Houses." Dean said aloud.

"Go figure." I replied, and then we went to go and see Ellen.

It really was a job well done, but at the same time there were some unresolved issues hanging around us, and tension in the air. The three of us wanted our old, playful relationships back with each other, but that was going to take some time and I wasn't sure how we were going to fair in the end. Sam and Dean really needed to talk to each other, and I really needed to talk to them too.

When we got into the Roadhouse, Ellen was there to greet us and we sat at the bar, Dean resting his hand on mine and our fingers interlacing. Ellen just smiled at the two of us when she glanced at the hand holding and I blushed a little—she obviously knew about our relationship somehow. All I knew right then was that I needed to be with Dean, and I wasn't about to let him go.

"You boys did one Hell of a job. Your father would be proud." Ellen said, handing them beers. "And you…you did great too—you should feel proud of what you did."

She handed me a beer too as I nodded, but looking at it made me realize that I could have it…that I wasn't able to have kids. I bit my lip and Ellen glanced at me, Dean squeezing my hand and looking at me as I opened my mouth to say something and then shut it. He opened his mouth to say something as I stood up, but Ellen beat him to it.

"Lana, are you all right?" She asked me in a motherly voice.

I smiled at her sadly. "You're great, Ellen, and I appreciate the hospitality, but I just lost a baby a little over a week ago and I just…I can't."

"Lana, I didn't know, I'm sorry." Ellen told me as I motioned to the beer.

"It's okay, you didn't know." I said, glancing at Dean as he swallowed. "Baby, I need fresh air, so…"

Dean nodded at me and I kissed his hand, leaving as Jo showed up to sit down next to him, Sam talking to Ash. Ash was showing Sam that he was on top of things and letting him know that if any of the signs or omens showed up, he'd be on it—he'd know what was going on and he would contact us.

"You know I have a couple of beds if you guys want to stay. I'm assuming you two have your own beds and you share with Lana, and that works for me—the offer's open." Ellen Sam and Dean as I stood just outside the door of the Roadhouse.

"Thanks, but no. I have something I need to finish." Dean told her.

I wiped the tears away and took a couple of deep breaths as Dean and Sam came out of the Roadhouse, and then got into the car and we went back to Bobby's. Dean set right in on working on his car, and I sat outside near it, on the ground, doing what I did while I was here before—reading and thinking over things. I thought about what the three of us could possibly do now that he was gone, and I looked up as Sam came over and stood next to me as I sat there, Dean working away to work through his pain. Sam wanted to talk and he knew he was going to get his wish, but at the same time we both knew this wasn't going to be some sweet, brotherly moment.

Sam put his hands on his hips and took a deep breath. "You were right."

"About what?" Dean asked, getting up from fixing one tire and going around to the other side to fix another.

"About me and Dad." Sam said, and Dean stood up to look at him. "I'm sorry that the last time I was with him, I tired to pick a fight. I'm sorry that I spent most of my life angry at him. I mean, for all I know, he died thinking I hate him. So you're right: what I'm doing right now is too little…it's too late. I miss him, man…and I feel guilty as Hell…and I'm not all right…not at all…but neither are you that much I know." Sam told him as the tears welled up in my eyes and Sam nodded. "I'll let you get back to work."

Then Sam turned and walked away, going inside, and Dean stood there for a moment watching him go as I wiped away fallen tears. I hated to see the two of them so hurt like this and it got even more heartbreaking when Dean took the crobar he was holding and he began to hit his car repeatedly, breaking a window, and then beating the trunk. He was letting it all out, and though he was hurting the car, it was the only piece of his Dad he had left…the only piece of his Dad he could let his anger and pain out on.

When he was done, he stood there hurt and sad, and I went over and I hugged him because I really didn't know what else to do. He resisted briefly, but then he let me wrap my arms around him and I knew he wanted to cry, but he wasn't going to—he was stronger than me because the hugging was really getting to me. When we pulled away, he looked at me and I nodded a little.

"I love you." I told him sincerely, shrugging a little and smiling through my tears.

Then he kissed me and though I was caught off guard, he needed this, and I returned his kiss with a passion we hadn't shared in a long while, and when we pulled away, we were slightly breathless. Dean stroked my hair, and clenched his jaw a little, trying to relax but not being able to with all of the pain he couldn't seen to get off of his chest in words.

"Let's go to the room and try and work through the pain in a more pleasing, physical manner." I whispered to him.

"I can't let you do that, Lanni." Dean replied, running his thumb along my cheek as he cupped my face lovingly.

"Sure you can, Dean. I mean we both need this—it's an outlet." I explained.

Dean smiled a little, and then he shook his head. "Not the right time, but thank you for thinking of me…you and I need time…for all of it."

I nodded slowly, smiling as he stroked my cheek a little more and I kissed him again. He and I were so broken, and for him it was mostly over his father, and for me it was mostly over the baby. I didn't know how either of us were going to get through this, but I knew then more than ever that we needed each other—that together was the only way that we were going to survive any of this.

"Lanni, thank you _so _much for thinking of me." Dean said softly, a little lost in though.

"Always." I promised with a nod.

Dean swallowed. "Do you want to let anything out? Sam and I have."

"I was really fond of your dad." I told him, smiling slowly and then putting my hands in my pockets, and looking at the ground. "He was so watchful over me…so loving of me…so wonderful to me. He gave me advice about us, gave me advice about how to keep everything in check, talked about my parents like the wonderful people they were—told me a bit about my birth mom. He treated me like more than a pretty girl with freaky powers like most people treated me—he was my family, and now he's gone…and he's not coming back. You know I never got to thank him? Not for anything and…" I said, but I trailed off as the tears came out and I wiped them away before Dean held me to him and I began to cry.

"He knew you loved him." He whispered against my hair as he embraced me. "I know he knew you loved him."

"Thanks for that." I told him and then I got choked up. "God, I feel so bad because mostly I just…I wanted that baby so badly, Dean."

Dean pulled back and looked me in the eye. "Don't feel bad about mourning the baby more than my father, Lanni—you were closer to the baby and I understand that, all right? Dad knew that you were thankful and he knew how much you needed him. You and I were going to have a baby…a baby that I was really growing fond of."

"Dean, I—" I tried as he got tears in his eyes, but he cut me off.

"—Lanni this doesn't have to be the end of that dream for us, you know. You stayed, and you've been honest, and you've been letting me in and you're my family, all right? When I'm with you, I'm home and God you know how I hate getting chick flicky like this but it's true. Someday, I will give you that family and I've never said that to anyone." He admitted and I lost it.

He was looking at me questioningly as the tears just started to pour out and I ran my fingers along his cheeks, caressing them softly. I looked into his eyes and I bit my lip, trying to stop it from quivering so much as I tried to find the words to say. When he asked me what was wrong I knew there was no way that I could keep it from him any longer, and though it was breaking me, I had to let it out.

"Baby, we're never having kids." I told him, and swallowed the painful lump in my throat. "I mean for a while I believed we'd be fine, and we'd have a baby and we'd find the demon, and kill it, and do what we needed and then eventually, things would work themselves out. Then I saw Alexian, who gave me hope when I was dying after Chelsea shot me, and I thought maybe we could…but…the bullet…they had to remove a significant part of my uterus…I can't conceive, Dean. They said it's going to be damn near impossible."

Dean stroked my hair. "I…I don't know what to say, Lanni."

"You don't have to say anything. You were on board because you had to be. I mean I know you actually wanted it, and I attribute that to me, as vain as that sounds, but now you don't have to feel like you have to be a family man…because I can't give you kids anyway…I can't give them to myself." I told him, the tears streaming down my face as I sniffled a little, trying to take in a breath through my nose. "I wanted to have babies with you so bad, Dean. I didn't want to scare you and talk about that, but I just…I was so excited—I was _so_ happy to be having your baby, and now…now I won't ever be in that situation again. Someday, I want to settle down with you, but kids aren't in the cards for us. Not right now."

"I promise you that you'll always have me." Dean told me strongly.

He kissed me, both of us sad, but glad that we had talked it out and were letting each other in. All that mattered right then was that we were being honest with each other, and though the chick flick moments between us would eventually go back to being pretty non-existent, right now we were coping, and we were coping together. I knew then that no matter what happened, Dean and I would be able to get through anything…we were in love, and as dangerous as that could be in our profession, we couldn't handle being alone.

"I'm going to let you get back to your baby." I told him, smiling sadly and kissing him swiftly.

Dean nodded and wiped away some of my tears with his thumbs. "All right."

I smiled and kissed him one more time, heading to the door to go in and then turning around to face him. "Hey, Dean...you'll always have me too."

**Note: So this chapter has a little bit of happiness in it…but a lot of angst. I actually cried writing some of it—shows you how attached I am, lol. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	3. Gray Areas and Commitments

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay so this chapter is still kinda angsty, but has some comedy and romance.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

I woke up at Bobby's and tried hard to find a reason to get out of bed. No one was around, because Sam and Dean had gone out for food, and Bobby was out buying more parts for something or other. So I sat up and threw the covers off of me, looking down at my pajama pants and short sleeved button-up shirt, and got out of bed, getting a little more dressed since I was going to be walking around Bobby's place—that meant putting a bra on.

After I'd done that and grabbed a snack from my duffle, I looked out a window in the room and heard the door open. I turned around to see Dean coming in, and I smiled at him and he sat on the bed and motioned to it, so I sat down on his lap, and wrapped my arms around his neck, peering at him. He smiled at me as I ran my fingers through his hair, and I had a feeling it was going to be a playful morning—our chick flick moments were getting less and less and soon we'd be back to our cute, horny selves.

I leaned in a little but didn't kiss him. "Good morning."

"Morning—I thought I could make something up to you today." He told me with a smile.

"You mean like greet me with coffee?" I asked him excitedly.

Dean chuckled and kissed me softly. "Well greet you, yes. However, I didn't bring you coffee."

I faked a shocked look. "No coffee?"

"No coffee." Dean told me, and then leaned in and brushed his lips against my ear. "But Sam went off to try and keep Bobby on his errand for another good couple of hours…"

I smiled and shifted my weight on his lap which made him grunt a little pleasantly. "Well now why would they leave the two of us crazy kids alone? Especially when I think it's about time you took me for a test ride…"

Dean just smiled, and then he kissed me and we sat there on the bed kissing for a good long while. As the kiss grew between us, Dean's fingers began to play with the buttons on my shirt, and once my shirt was unbuttoned, I slid it off of me, and Dean's lips traveled down to my neck, and he sucked on my skin softly.

Sighing happily, I ran my fingers through Dean's hair and then I played with the bottom of his t-shirt, and slid his shirt off of him, smirking as he bit my skin lovingly and then pulled away. I kissed his neck softly, sucking on it as he ran his fingers along my back, and then laid me on the bed and climbed on top of me. After giving him a hickie, I pulled away from his neck and we both looked at each other and smiled.

"I believe I see the clasp in the front." Dean told me with a chuckle, running his knuckle along the swell of my breast, glancing at my bra.

I took a breath. "I believe that means I mean business."

"Have I ever told you how much fun you are?" Dean asked me, a grin on his face.

"No." I laughed and smiled. "But I will take fun over awkward any day, I promise you that."

Dean rolled his eyes and kissed me again with a smile on his face, me running my fingers along his cheeks, trying to draw him in closer. He smiled a little into the kiss, and when his tongue touched my lips, I parted them to allow his tongue to slip into my mouth. Moaning softly, I felt his hand travel down from my hair to my breast, and I jumped slightly, laughing.

"Dean…" I whispered.

He smirked at me and left his hand where it was whispering back, "Lanni…"

He kissed me, squeezing my breast softly, and I giggled a little, continuing to kiss him. We hadn't gotten to just be playful in a long while and I was pretty certain that if I screwed this up neither of us would get where we wanted, so I ran my hands down his naked torso, getting to his jeans and pausing. After a moment of stroking his abs, I had to suck in a little air between kisses as Dean squeezed again and then ran his thumb along the bra cup right across my nipple. To even the score, I dipped my fingers under his waistband and our breathing started to change.

"Why in the Heavens do you wear a belt?" I asked him suddenly, feeling the need to get him naked pretty much right then and there. "Don't get me wrong, I enjoy working for it, but I'm not so good with belts."

Dean chuckled and dragged his lips down my chest, raking his teeth along my breasts and I closed my eyes and tilted my head back into the pillows. Oh, if he wanted to take the reins then he could take the reins—this felt far too good. I was a little surprised when I felt his tongue and it made my whole body tingle and I knew I couldn't take it anymore—he was making me act like a cat in heat…damn him!

"Okay, pants off now." I said, stroking his hair and biting my lip as he chuckled and it rumbled against my chest. "Where the Hell do you learn your moves?"

"I think it's safe to say that—" Dean began but we both heard a noise and the door to the room opened.

We both turned to see Sam standing there and I blushed and for once actually wished Sam would just turn around and step back out. I wanted Dean to continue what he was doing, and though he was all for making my phone conversations awkward, Dean wasn't into doing things to me when his brother was standing right there. In order to alleviate the embarrassment, I let out a small laugh and then sat up when Dean did, covering my chest with a pillow and smiling awkwardly at Sam.

"I thought you said you'd keep Bobby busy." Dean told his brother with a sigh.

"I said I'd _try_—he really wanted to get back." Sam said with a shrug. "Thought I'd warn you two at least that we're back."

Dean and I got up and Sam just smirked and then walked out of the room while Dean and I grabbed our shirts. We both paused a moment, neither of us really wanting to put them on and the wheels turning in our heads. Unfortunately, neither of us could think of a way to continue where we had been headed before. If it had been Jen's house I just would have called out that Dean and I were going to have sex…but I didn't know Bobby that well so oh well for us, I guess…

"I guess you'll have to make it up to me later—today it's time to work on your baby some more." I told him. "And I was referring to your car since you can't work on me anymore."

Dean chuckled and nodded as he pulled his shirt on, and then my phone rang. "Who is it?"

"Who's the only person that really calls me?" I asked him, smirking a bit.

Dean smiled at me. "Jen. Pick it up."

I pulled my shirt on and then picked up the phone and rested it on my shoulder as I buttoned up my shirt. "Hey, honey!"

"I'm coming and Kevin doesn't know." Jen told me in a soft whisper. "Meet me at the airport so I can get to Bobby's?"

"Are you sure that you—" I sighed when she said my name in a chastising way and nodded. "Yeah, sure thing. Um…I'll see what car Bobby has up and running."

Dean looked at me. "When will she get here?"

I turned to him. "I don't know."

"A couple days." Jen said in yet another whisper, which meant she didn't want Kevin to hear her on the phone and he was close.

"A couple days." I told him.

"By then she'll be ready." Dean smiled, and then left the room as Sam came in.

I watched his ass as he left and frowned a little. "Call me before you get on the plane in a couple days, Jenny."

"I will, Lan. Bye for now. I hear him coming." She whispered, and then there was a click and I hung up.

I laughed a little at my best friend's odd behavior and then headed out to the living room area and sat with Sam on the couch. Dean had already headed out to the Impala to try and fix her up some more after his brutal beating on her a couple days before, and Bobby was undoubtedly studying something. I had actually grown quite close to Bobby during the time we'd been staying here, and I was thankful for him…he was also yet another person that knew my birth mother better than I did.

"You looked kind of annoyed with me earlier." Sam told me with a small laugh.

I smiled at him and snuggled against him. "I wasn't annoyed with _you_, Sammy, I was just really looking forward to having a little sex."

"So you're feeling okay about that then?" Sam asked me, running his fingers through my hair. "I know you weren't feeling so okay with it a couple days ago."

"Yeah…I'm getting a little better about it, I think." I admitted with a nod. "Thanks for looking out for me, Sammy."

Sam smiled at me and kissed my forehead, and then we watched some TV and hung out with each other all day, and then we got a hunt. Dean was actually really excited about that too, because he got his baby fixed sooner than he had anticipated. She looked so shiny and new, and a total machine, and I knew that Dean was in a _much_ better mood just having her there.

"Whoo! Listen to her purr! Have you ever heard anything so sweet?" Dean asked Sam as I IMed Jen in the backseat like the old days.

Sam laughed merrily. "You know if you two need a room, Dean, just tell me."

"Oh don't listen to him, Baby." Dean told the Impala. "He doesn't understand us."

"You're in a good mood." Sam said with another laugh.

"And why shouldn't I be? I have my car, and a case, Lanni and I are mostly patched up…things are looking up." Dean admitted as I smiled in the back.

When Sam mentioned that Red Ridge was about another 300 miles away, Dean said, "Good," and then he sped the car up. He was incredibly happy, and when we got where we needed to go, Sam and Dean wanted to talk to the Sheriff, and so they dressed up as reporters and I sat in the car and stuck a piece of gum in my mouth—I wasn't quite up for that just yet.

"You do some more research and we'll see what the Sheriff knows that might help." Dean told me, stroking my hair.

I smiled at how well he knew me. "Ask about a connection between the cows and the murders—it may be a Satanic ritual."

xx

"I think that _someone _wants a certain someone else to go with them to the morgue." I told Dean as I fixed his tie in the motel room when he and Sam got back.

Dean rolled his eyes. "Someone's trying to get all mushy on me."

"Oh, our chick flick ended? Boo-Hoo." I said, pouting my lip and smiling when he bit my pouting lip softly. "We could still be a thriller…"

"I'm only letting you come with us because that skirt hugs you the right way." Dean replied and laughed when I smacked his arm.

I rolled my eyes at him. "I do _not_ know why I love you so much."

Dean smiled and then we went to the morgue, Dean making up an excuse to get the guy to get out of the room. Then he and Sam argued a bit over who was going to open up the box with the head in it. I rolled my eyes as I laughed a little, and felt pretty good about the three of us actually trying to move on.

"Oh my God, I'll do it, you big babies." I told them, and took the box over to the table and Dean followed.

"Just in case you pass out." He said, but I knew by the look on his face he didn't want to be labeled as a wuss.

I nodded and took a breath. "So hopefully we get a backwards pentagram on the forehead, or we're back at square one."

"No pentagram." Dean said as I opened up the box and Sam came over. "See if there's anything down her throat, kind of like that moth in 'Silence of the Lambs'."

He and Sam argued over it a bit more and I sighed. "Boys, come on. This is ridiculous."

"Why don't you do it then?" Dean asked me, motioning to the severed head.

"Because there is _no_ way I'm doing that." I told him with an indignant scoff.

He sighed, and then Sam checked her throat. "Dean…get me a bucket."

"You find something?" Dean asked him as I gagged a little and made a face.

"No, I'm gonna puke." He said.

I nodded and looked over what he was doing, trying to keep the vomit at bay cause as many dead bodies as we saw, this was pretty fresh and digging around in it was gross. The only thing worse than dealing with the severed head, was dealing with sticking our hand into her mouth, I'll tell you that much right now. Then Dean and I both saw the same thing and Dean spoke up.

"Wait a minute, lift her lip up again." Dean ordered Sam.

Sam shot him an angry look. "You want me to puke, don't you?"

"No, something's there." I said, and then we found a vampire fang when Sam did what Dean told him to. "Oh my God—she wasn't an innocent girl…she was a vampire."

"That changes things." Sam pondered out loud.

Dean gave Sam a look. "You think?"

We got into the car and then we drove to a bar and went inside, and I was getting weird vibes from a guy inside. We made eye contact, and then I looked away and followed Sam and Dean up to the bar. If I was getting weird vibes, then it was best to stick with the two men that I actually trusted with my life and start to let my actions dictate my gut instincts.

"What can I get you?" The bartender asked them.

"Three beers, please." Dean replied after glancing at me to make sure that was all right and I just kid of nodded slowly.

Sam spoke up. "We're looking for some people."

"Sure…it's hard being lonely." The bartender said. "Though, she probably gives you a run for your money."

I looked at him with a glare and Sam and Dean looked at each other, wondering who was going to step in and how. At first I just expected Sam to because normally he stood up for me first, but Dean was my boyfriend. Why wasn't he getting all jealous and stepping in for my honor? Oh he was _definitely_ going to pay for pausing and actually _thinking_ about how to react! He should have just simply _reacted_!

"I think it would be best if you showed the lady some respect." Dean told the bartender, his eyes flashing a little.

I nodded. "I am _not_ a whore."

"Yeah, that's not what we meant." Sam said, and pulled out a fifty as the bartender looked me up and down and I crossed my arms over my chest in an attempt to hide myself from his gaze…it wasn't working.

The bartender took the fifty, and then Sam asked if there were some people who had moved in about six months ago—probably real party animals that slept during the day and partied at night. When we figured out where we were supposed to go, the 'Barker Farm', I chugged a little of the beer and then went out with the boys and made a rather upset face.

"I can't believe he said that! Exactly what about my attire would make anyone assume that I'm an easy trollop?" I asked them as we left and then turned to Dean. "And what the _Hell_ was with the hesitation to defend me?"

Dean smiled a little. "You know you don't always like it when I step in for you—sometimes you like taking care of it yourself and the guy was an ass. If he had tried to touch you, I would have knocked him on the floor and he didn't come right out and tell you to your face that you were anything really derogative—I mean you give _me_ a run for my money."

"Well this time I wanted you to be 'jealous boyfriend'." I said, though I smiled because sometimes I really _did _want to handle jerks on my own and I nodded slowly. "Now if you care to know…" I looked around and lowered my voice, coming closer to them, "…we're being followed."

"I know," Sam replied with a nod. "Let's go towards the alley."

We walked down in the alley and then hid until the man I had made eye contact with back at the bar had caught up with us, and we backed him against the wall. He had dark skin and his eyes were dangerous but he definitely wasn't a demon or vampire or anything. Still, I wasn't getting good vibes off of him, and I knew in the long run, trusting my instincts was the absolute best choice these days.

"I'm not a vampire." He said as I said the same thing about him.

I nodded at him. "If he was, I would have gotten that from him—he's just a creep."

"I believe her, but just to be on the safe side…" Dean told the man.

I smiled at him as he and Sam forced the man to show that he didn't have retractable teeth, and then we introduced ourselves and went to his car and saw his collection of knives. His name was Gordon Walker, and he knew a lot about the Winchesters, and about my cousin, Katelyn Newman, and me, and that creeped me out a bit—I didn't like knowing everyone knew me!

Still, he was a hunter and so we offered to help him with the hunt and he turned us down. He wouldn't tell us anything about the nest, and he wouldn't let us help him finish off the vampires because this was his hunt and we were encroaching on his territory. Dean was itching for a hunt right now, but I was trying to figure this guy out—he seemed off to me. I mean he wasn't anything supernatural, but I certainly didn't trust him and it was kind of annoying me.

"I'm sorry guys. I'm a 'go-it-alone' type of guy, and I'm not quite sure she could handle it." Gordon said with a smile in my direction.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! First I'm a whore, and now I can't handle vampires? You know what, I've killed more demons than you can even imagine. Hell, you know enough about me to know that I've killed more demons than most hunters, including the old school vamps." I told him and waved my hands in the air.

Gordon just smiled and got into his car, and I frowned, Dean speaking up. "He didn't mean anything by it."

"Are you kidding? It's like 'Pick on Lana Day'!" I shot at him. "I'll be in the car if you want or need me. You know? The poor helpless girl?"

And with that, I hurried over to the car and then got into it, knowing I was being childish, but really wanting to prove that I could handle myself. I was no longer as upset about Dean not standing up for me sooner either—I could have chewed that guy out all on my own. Now, out of nowhere, some hunter shows up who knows who I am and he actually had the _audacity_ to say I _couldn't handle vampires_?

That was just it! I was going to show _all _of them that I could do it, and I got out of the car as the boys came over and I straightened out my shirt. They both recognized the look on my face and smiled, nodding at me when I told them that Gordon was going to need our help. So we headed out to find him and when we got there, I helped Dean beat on the vampire before Dean seemed to have it under control.

I was feeling pretty proud of myself, and a little turned on when Dean got the vampire over near a giant chain saw, and started to cut his head off. At the same time, I was feeling a little worried like Sam was because of the look of bloodlust in Dean's eyes—he liked killing the vampire a little _too_ much. Still…Dean with blood splattered all over his face while he was out of breath? It doesn't take a genius to know that that mental image is seriously gasm-worthy.

"Well, I guess I'm going to have to buy you guys that drink." Gordon said panting because he had gotten beaten up. "And you…you are amazing, Alana—I take back what I said before."

I nodded at him because he had better. "Please, call me Lana. Besides, if you're going to buy us some drinks like you promised before you drove off leaving me feeling like crap, you should call me Lana."

So the four of us went out to our cars and I grabbed a couple of washcloths from my duffle and handed them to Dean, who chuckled. I rolled my eyes because he was feeling pretty damn good about himself, but I giggled when he reached out and grabbed my ass, pulling my body close to his as he wiped himself off with his free hand.

"My baby thinks I'm sexy all blood-splattered." Dean whispered, leaning his face in.

I nodded at him. "I do, but…you smell like dead person and that's not as sexy."

"Careful, Baby, I like it when you make fun of me." Dean replied, leaning in a little further.

"Stop being all hot and tempting!" I told him quickly and pushed on him. "I love it, and I'd like to take you in the backseat right now, but I should remind you that you just met a new hunter and you're being all PDA right now."

Dean shrugged. "I'm marking my territory."

"Oh, cause I _belong_ to you, huh?" I asked him, raising my eyebrows.

"No…but you _are_ my girlfriend, and you said before you wanted me to be all 'jealous boyfriend'." Dean reminded me and then snuck a kiss from me.

I smiled at him and swatted his ass as he turned away and then shrugged a little when Gordon looked our direction and assessed it all. He was obviously convinced that Dean and I were sleeping together, and I didn't mind him thinking that—it was definitely true. Besides, I could totally get used to the PDA because I liked other women knowing that Dean was in fact _my_ boyfriend, and not _their_ fun night.

I got into the car and we went to the bar, but Sam and I weren't having a very good time, actually. Dean and Gordon were having a little too much fun talking about the decapitation, and to be honest, I was kind of upset with the way Dean was acting. It was clearly obvious that Sam wasn't enjoying the conversation, but Dean was dealing with it his own way, and since Sam and I were finding the way he and Gordon were acting kind of rude, we went back to the motel by ourselves and sat down.

"You okay?" I asked Sam as he sighed.

Sam shrugged a little. "I don't know…I kind of hate what's going on around here, right now—did you _hear _them talking? They see hunts in black and white and that's not how they are! I mean look at you!"

"Yeah…Dean is being influenced by Gordon to view this as just any other hunt and I'm clearly…I mean I'm a supernatural being and he isn't hunting me." I agreed with a nod. "It's probably only because I put out, too."

Sam kissed my forehead. "Stop selling yourself short, Lan—we love you and _that's_ the only difference."

"I love you too, Sammy." I assured him.

He smiled at me and then sat on the couch to watch some TV and I quickly got into the shower and then when I was done washing my hair and everything, I got out and wrapped a towel around me and used another one to dry my hair. Sam wasn't in the room anymore, so I just assumed he had gone out to get something, so I got dressed and then I felt like something was wrong—like I was being watched.

"You fucking blood suckers, just come out." I told them.

I knew they were there, but it wasn't until Sam came in that we got ambushed and then knocked out. When I woke up, I was gagged, and so was Sam, and we were somewhere with vampires. A woman came to us and told us they drank from cattle—told us not to hunt them because they weren't like the others. Then she had her men take us back without a scratch, but we were blind folded so we wouldn't know exactly where they were.

When we were returned, Sam and I looked at each other and then we knew we had to make a decision. On the one hand they were vampires, but neither of us wanted to hunt them because they weren't hurting us and their story about feeding on cattle was actually checking out. So, the only thing left to do for Sam and I was to tell Dean that it was time for us to pack up and move on.

"We tell them." I told Sam with a shrug, crossing my arms over my chest. "We tell them, we pack up, we move on and find another hunt somewhere else."

Sam nodded in agreement. "We just tell Dean—I don't trust Gordon…and neither does Ellen."

"I don't trust him either, so now that _that's_ settled…we'll have to talk to him alone. Gordon…I don't know—I'm blaming him for this." I pointed to my hair and Sam smiled a little even though the circumstances were grave.

"You look fine." Sam assured me.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "I look like a mangy cat, but thanks for trying to make me feel better, Sammy."

Sam just went inside and came out with Dean and I took a deep breath. "We wanted to tell you that we just can't deny our feelings for each other anymore."

Dean gave me a look. "You wanna be serious?"

"Sure—Sammy and I don't think we should do this hunt." I told Dean plainly, shrugging at him.

"What?" Dean asked. "Where were you?"

I took a deep breath. "_In_ the nest."

"Where is it? How many did you kill?" Dean asked hurriedly, ready for action.

"None," Sam replied with a shrug.

"What?" Dean asked, and I turned to see Gordon listening to us, but I felt the tension between Sam and Dean and it was more important to me—especially since Dean had anger in his voice.

I made a face. "They're not like other vampires—they haven't been killing humans."

"Then how do they stay alive? Or undead?" Dean asked me matter-a-factly.

"The cattle mutilations—they haven't been feeding on human blood." Sam explained.

Dean was looking at Sam and I like we were crazy and honestly at first we had thought that we were crazy too. The thing was, Sam and I didn't see this hunt in black and white like Dean and Gordon did, and I was pretty certain that we were all really about to fight about all of this. I hated fighting with them, but there was really no way that I could avoid this one because Dean was being ridiculous.

"Is that what they told you?" Dean asked Sam and me, looking at us like we were stupid. "And you believed them?"

Sam sighed and nodded. "Look at us—there's not a scratch on us."

"Even so, we need to find them and waste them." Dean told us, shrugging at him.

Then he and Sam began to argue about Gordon and his judgment, and then Sam accused Dean of filling the hole from their Dad with Gordon who was a poor substitute after Dean got mad about Sam calling Ellen without telling him. Sam dragging Ellen into it and trying to get Dean to actually verbally open up to him about their father was not a good idea in the long run, and I gasped as Dean punched Sam in the face and I felt my anger boil up. I knew Dean felt like he had found someone to look up to and trust, but that was uncalled for and I wasn't sure I was liking Gordon's influence on Dean in the slightest.

"Dean?" I asked, as Sam was recovering.

"What?" He asked angrily, and I punched him hard in the face and his head jerked, and then he looked at me angrily.

Then as he and Sam argued some more, I went inside the motel and grabbed a towel to finish with my hair—the testosterone war was killing me, and my hand hurt. I knew I bruised my knuckles and I sighed, wishing that I hadn't left Gordon alone too long because Lord knew he was doing something that was going to make everything that much worse. I also felt bad about punching Dean in the face, but in the heat of the moment it seemed like the right thing to do…I was trying to jolt him back into reality. Note to self: punching Dean Winchester in the face _doesn't_ jolt him back into reality.

"He snaked the keys." I heard Dean say.

"Yeah…he's probably already headed out there." I told them, taking a breath. "He was listening to our conversation outside."

We hurried to the nest, and found Gordon torturing Lenore, the vampire who let Sam and I go, with her one poison—Dean Man's blood. We found out that he knew they were nice, and he just wanted to kill them—wanted to kill them because he hated them…because his sister had been turned, and he had had to kill her. He didn't believe in shades of gray as Sam and I did…only in the black and white of the hunt. Then he cut Sam with the knife and had him at bay, Dean cocking the gun and pointing it at him as I started to use a spell.

"Don't even try it, Alana." Gordon told me. "You think I can't counteract whatever it is you're about to do—I'm proving a point, here."

As he squeezed Sam's arm, he dripped blood into her mouth and though she hissed, she resisted it. Lenore resisted the temptation, which made Sam and I even more convinced we should all just leave because she was proving our point. So, Sam and I helped her outside, and I heard the fighting inside, knowing that Dean was pretty pissed that he had gotten played—he wasn't really okay with that.

I looked Lenore over. "You get Lenore out of here…I need to…I need to think."

"He won't hold you hitting him over you forever." Sam told me, supporting Lenore's weight.

"I need to practice these powers of mine." I replied, waving it off. "I'll be all right, I promise, Sammy."

Sam nodded at me and then he took the car and headed off with Lenore to keep her safe. I sat outside on the porch, and I pretended to practice with my powers, but I really sat and thought about things. There are gray areas—I had been looking at the Chelsea situation in black and white, but really…really Chelsea was mad at Jen and I for treating her like she didn't matter—and she did. We just had to show her that again…because it had been _our_ fault that she had gotten turned in the first place.

Chelsea was the reason I had lost my baby because if I hadn't gotten shot where she had shot me, the surgery wouldn't have happened. I was never going to be able to forgive her for making it so that I would never be able to have children, but Jen and I had gotten her killed…_I_ had gotten her killed. I had to figure out what Chelsea was up to, what she wanted, and how I was going to be able to take her out…I had made a promise and it was about time I kept it.

xx

Come sunrise, Sam came back and I looked up at him, smiling. "Hey, Sammy."

"You okay?" He asked me, sitting down next to me.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…just a lot of thinking."

Sam nodded to and then looked at the door. "You been in there?"

"No, I haven't—I figured Dean could use his space and torture Gordon all on his own." I replied. "Besides…I punched him in the face."

"Let's go, Lan." Sam told me, standing up and holding out his hand for mine.

I looked up into Sam's eyes and nodded, taking his hand and letting him pull me to my feet, both of us going in as Dean talked to Gordon. Sam assured Dean that Lenore and all the others got to safety and Dean nodded, not really looking my way and I understood that. When Sam asked if Dean was ready to go, he said "almost", and then he started to say "goodbye" to Gordon before he punched him so hard the chair fell backwards, and then he sniffed and cleared his throat.

"Okay, I'm good now, we can go." He said merrily.

Sam and I chuckled a little, and then followed him, and Dean wiped some blood off of his mouth and started getting a little antsy. He wanted to apologize, but he was Dean Winchester, and even though Sam was his brother, Dean really only seemed to apologize to me. Then again, I was technically his 'lover', so it was really the only reason he was so nice to me, and besides…I had punched my poor, hot man in my face.

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"Sam?" Dean asked his brother.

Sam turned to him. "Yeah?"

"Clock me one." Dean told him.

"What?" Sam asked skeptically, wondering if he heard right.

"Come on, I won't even hit you back, let's go." Dean said as Sam chuckled.

Sam shook his head and then answered Dean after a pause. "No."

"Let's go. You get a freebee…hit me, come on." Dean told him.

I smiled a little at Dean's way of apologizing to Sam for hitting him in the face, and Sam laughed too. Dean was just trying to make everything good between them, but Sam had already forgiven him because of how Dean was feeling about their father. In fact, since John died, Sam had been cutting Dean a lot more slack these days than I was and I felt a little bad about that.

"You look like you went 12 rounds with a block of cement, Dean. I'll take a rain check." Sam told him, walking away, and I followed him.

"I wish we never took this job. It jacked everything up." Dean said, walking to the car as well.

Sam looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"Think about all the hunts, Sam. What if we killed things that didn't deserve killing?" Dean asked him slowly. "I mean what if you and Lanni are right about these gray areas?"

I sighed and climbed into the backseat as Sam tried to convince Dean that since he didn't kill the vampire that was all that mattered—he saw the gray area. Then Sam mentioned me and how I was a gray area, and it just meant we had to be more objective…we had to make sure that we knew the whole story before swooping in and taking people out. They didn't even know just how _much_ of a gray area I was…would I ever tell them?

"'Cause you're a pain in my ass." Dean said, sounding slightly teary-eyed.

Sam chuckled. "I guess I might have to stick around to be a pain in the ass then."

"Thanks." Dean said after a pause as Sam opened up the passenger side door.

"Don't mention it." Sam told him, getting into the car.

After a long moment, Dean climbed in and we drove off, heading for a motel and getting ourselves a room. Dean and I hadn't actually talked to each other since I had punched him in the face and Sam could sense the tension on my end so he decided to go and grab something to eat and Dean sat on our motel bed. I took a deep breath and put my hands in my back pockets, standing in front of him and biting my lip as he looked up at me.

"Do you want to hit me?" I asked Dean softly.

"What?" Dean asked me with a chuckle.

I cocked my head to one side. "Do you want a freebee? I mean you deserve it—I hit your beautiful face."

Dean pulled me down on his lap and I smiled at him as he stroked my hair and then reached for his duffle. I was kind of confused as he started to rummage through it, and even _more_ confused when he pulled out a small jewelry box. My mouth gaped open a little when he opened it and pulled out a silver band with an engraving in it and held it up.

"Even though you punched me in the face, Lanni…Jen and I have been talking and she told me I needed to make sure that you knew how much you meant to me." Dean told me with a shrug.

I swallowed. "Dean…is that…a _promise_ _ring_?"

"This is really chick flicky for me, so can you just put it on or _not_ put it on?" Dean asked me slowly.

"You are _so_ romantic." I told him, grinning at him and holding out my hand for him to put the ring on my finger. "You better be putting that ring on my finger, Deano…because if you don't, I'm gonna have to hurt you—romance works with me, just so you know."

Dean laughed and slipped the ring onto my left ring finger, kissing me softly as I grinned at him. He actually loved me enough to commit—even if it wasn't actually a proposal—he loved me enough to care about how I felt. When I started to slip off my button-up top, we both sighed, Sam walking into the room and Dean flopping back on the bed. I had to laugh a little, even though I really just wanted to have sex with my under the radar, romantic boyfriend.

"Sorry, Baby…maybe later." I told Dean with a small pat on his abs.

**Note: Those of you that have read the other version know that this promise ring thing has a purpose and don't worry—they are far from becoming the mushy couple, they're just coping. Hope you guys liked it! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	4. No More Crutch For Us

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Third Person**

"Dean, seriously!" Lana told him in a harsh whisper as his fingers traveled up her leg. "Sam could walk in here any moment and I am _trying _to talk to Jen!"

Jen laughed loudly through the phone. "He's just upset you guys haven't had sex in a few weeks."

"Yes, Jen, I know that—Dean!" Lana chastised.

"Dean, stop being such a perv." Sam told him with a laugh, coming back into the motel room with coffee.

Dean sighed. "Thanks for ruining my fun, Sammy."

Sam rolled his eyes as Lana continued to talk to Jen on the phone even though she was feeling a little bad about letting Jen come and not telling Kevin. In fact Lana wasn't the only one feeling bad about it—Sam was pretty upset with her about it too. In the long run Lana knew that in putting herself in the middle and being thrilled about Jen coming, she was going to piss Kevin off, and though that was bad, Lana was willing to risk it.

The thing about Jen was that she had this fear of being controlled—of being made to take a back seat in her own life. Since she had married Kevin, she had been trying to get used to making joint decisions instead of just running off and making her own, which was good, but it was driving her crazy. Not to mention, she was starting to freak out a little bit at the prospect of having kids when she and Kevin hadn't even been married as long as she had hoped they would be _before_ children.

She had always had this idea in her head about love and school and then marriage and a career and _then _kids…she had just gotten caught up in everything. The problem right now was that she and Kevin had decided to start seizing the day instead of sitting down and following the plan that they had had laid out for themselves and Jen was starting to think that she needed to change that. Hence this hunt.

"Seriously? You're letting her come freshly from her honeymoon without Kevin knowing?" Sam asked Lana. "I haven't changed your mind yet?"

Lana shrugged and sat on the edge of the bed after hanging up with Jen. "She's my best friend, Sammy—I'm gonna let her come and visit."

"I mean, why not?" Dean asked aloud, grabbing a coffee and sipping it. "Jen's the one that wants to come and see us. I mean, why not let her?"

At that exact moment, Jen had been finishing up packing a duffle and looked up when Kevin came into the room. He smiled sadly at her because he wasn't stupid and he had a really good idea about what it was that was packed in that duffle of hers. So he leaned on the door frame and he looked directly at her because Jen had yet to ever lie to him—she never even lied to him to try and protect him.

"You off to see Lana?" Kevin asked her. "Some hunt or another?"

Jen sighed loudly. "I just need to have a little bit of space. I do my best thinking with Lan and I just need to be with her. Besides, she's still dealing with a miscarriage and we're trying for kids. She needs me by her side right now. I'm coming back."

"I know, you always come back—I just worry, babe," Kevin said with a nod. "Please be careful and remember that I worry."

"I'll be perfectly careful," Jen promised, getting up and kissing her husband gently, kissing his nose before pulling away. "You're my husband."

"Because, Dean, Kevin is her _husband_. He should know that she's coming to hang out with us—three people that hunt demons whenever we get the chance. She shouldn't be in this environment when she's trying to be a mother." Sam explained to them like he had to talk slow in order for them to understand.

Lana sighed and they all piled into the car to go to the airport. "Sam, it's going to be fine, Jen and I know how to protect ourselves—she and I are both witches. Besides, I know for a fact that she'll end up telling him before she comes because he knows when she's hiding things and she hates lying to him."

Dean nodded at that and Lana nodded slowly too, waiting for Sam and Dean to pick up on what it was that she had just said. Lana had just informed them that it wasn't just _her _who had powers—no, her best friend had powers too. Granted Jen was just a witch, she had no affiliation with demon blood like Lana did so her powers were nowhere near as extensive as hers, Lana just stayed away from everything demonic she could as far as her powers were concerned. It didn't set in until they parked the car in the airport parking lot and Dean turned to Lana with a look on his face and she just kept nodding, waiting for him to say it out loud.

"Wait, you mean you _both_ have powers?" Dean asked her.

Lana laughed a little. "Yeah, and whatever babies she has in the future probably will too—it is kind of a trait passed down through blood."

"Wow," Sam said and nodded slowly. "I still think this is a bad idea."

"I guess I don't have to worry about it now, but uh…_our _baby would have probably had powers too." Lana explained to Dean, nodding and then changing the subject because that kid would have…demon blood did that. "Let's go get Jen, shall we?"

The boys nodded and they went into the airport, hanging out around the luggage carousel while Lana impatiently tapped her foot as she waited for her doey eyed best friend. She didn't have long to wait for her either, and when they saw each other, they both immediately grinned and went to hug each other fondly. In fact they were probably making quite the spectacle of themselves because they started squealing and bouncing about like they normally did when they were together. Lana had missed Jennifer so much more than anyone knew, and the feeling was mutual.

"Jenny!" Lana cried, breathing in the scent of her hair as she held her close.

"Lanni!" Jen replied just as happily.

Lana laughed a little and then pulled back and looked her over, not catching a baby bump and being assured that Jen wasn't pregnant yet. Even if she had been, Lana would have been genuinely excited and loved her all the more for actually getting to be a mother—it didn't matter how Lana was feeling about babies right now because Jen's happiness and future always came first. Besides, while Jen was going to have a family, Lana was feeling pretty proud of her promise ring that she got to show off.

"How are you?" Sam asked Jen as he and Dean went over to them.

Jen smiled at him. "I'm okay, though I do wish I saw more of you guys. You guys sometimes go off the grid for a bit."

"It happens." Dean replied with a shrug.

"So what brings you here?" Sam asked Jen. "I don't want to hear any crap about visiting either—I know Lan a _lot_ better than that."

Jen laughed and looked at Lana. "Well you were right—should we tell them?"

"I was _really_ hoping we wouldn't have to." Lana admitted slowly.

Dean gave Lana a look as Jen laughed, both of them completely aware that their cover was blown and they were going to have to come clean. There was always the off chance that they could just cover it all up with some other lie, but then again…Sam and Dean were starting to be able to see right through Lana's lies. Besides, Jen hated lying and she and Lana were pretty particular about what they were going to do and right now they were going to play it as safe as possible.

"Fess up, Lanni—what's going on?" Dean asked Lana, his voice all hot and stern, which was incredibly annoying to Lana because it made her want to cave.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I was able to shrug—thank you, Jesus. "Nothing important—Jen and I just wanted to get together like the old times. Let's go to the Roadhouse."

"Why?" Dean asked skeptically.

"Because I want to meet Ellen—Lana tells me lots of things about her, but I want to meet her first hand." Jen told him with a grin.

The boys seemed skeptic, but they took us without any more questions—at least about wanting to go to the Roadhouse. It seemed that Jen was a lot harder to read than I was, but that was because they were forced to see me every day. So we chatted a little about her plane ride and then got her bags and got into the Impala, Jen and I in the backseat.

"So how's Kevin?" Sam asked, turning a little to talk to us.

"Kevin is as protective as ever. I appreciate it, don't get me wrong, but I needed some air." Jen explained. "The two of us have an understanding and as long as I come back to him unharmed, we won't have a problem."

I laughed loudly and shrugged when she hit my shoulder. "Seriously? The man is _too_ worried."

"Well he _was_ tortured by werewolves and found by vampires before he was returned to us." Jen said with a mild shrug. "Besides, he's always been protective of what happens to me, even before he knew about the hunting and the powers…just like Dean is of you."

"True, true." I told her. "But you can't blame it all on that—he was a nut _before_ he was taken from us against his will."

Jen shot me a look and when I pouted she rolled her eyes and the four of us sat there in silence until we got to the Roadhouse. When we walked in, Ellen looked up from cleaning a bar and smiled, coming over to us. I was actually happy to see her since our last meeting hadn't been so pleasant, and I welcomed the hug…I missed having a motherly figure around. My own was off gallivanting around and while I knew it was for my protection as much as her own, Ellen was nice to have around.

"Well hello, you three…and who might this be?" Ellen asked with a smile on her face as she pulled back from the hug to look Jen over.

Jen held her hand out. "Jennifer Delkan."

"We just call her 'Jen'." I told Ellen with a grin. "She's been my best friend since…well her mother knew my birth mother _and_ my adopted mother—we're womb buddies."

Ellen laughed and stroked my hair in a motherly fashion. "I've heard of you from John."

"From John? Really?" Jen asked, her face flushing a little. "That's a high compliment!"

"Well if he knew _my_ mothers, he knew _yours_, and besides…I told him all sorts of stories." I told Jen, a cheeky grin on my face. "You know me—I like to hear my own voice. This is Ellen, Jen. She's one of the nicest people I've met in a while."

Jen rolled her eyes at me again before she and Ellen started to talk a little bit and then we turned when we heard footsteps, me smiling at Jo and giving her a little wave. I had nothing against her, but I didn't know her well as of yet and I was pretty excited to have her and Jen meet. Jen was a fabulous judge of character and I was hoping to spend a little time here with Ellen and Jo, so it would be best we all get to know each other.

"Who's this?" Jo asked, a smile on her face.

I pointed in between her and Jen. "Jo, Jen. Jen, Jo. Jo is Ellen's daughter, and Jen is my best friend."

"Nice to meet you." Jo told her, she and Jen both shaking hands. "What brings you out here, Jen?"

"Visiting my friends and seeing what Lana's going through. Plus, the husband is a being a little _too _over-protective for my taste." Jen joked, and Jo smiled friendly at her.

I pushed my bangs out of my face as they dropped hands and Dean cleared his throat, Ellen's eyes lighting up. At first I was completely surprised by her reaction, but then remembered that my bangs were more on the left today, and my promise ring was on my left hand. She smiled at me and I held it out, she and Jo looking at it as Dean sighed behind me and Jen and Sam laughed a little.

"It's a promise ring." I informed her as she looked at it. "I think Deano's feeling a little bad about the funk I've been in since…well…yeah…"

Ellen glanced at him. "Well you're proving some of your father's stories wrong, Boy."

"I think I'll take that as a compliment." Dean told her. "Think we could get a couple beers?"

"And for those of us who can't consume alcohol—like Trying-to-Get-Preggers over here—who's up for a bit of poker?" I asked with a grin. "I'll take the beer as well though…I have nothing to lose due to alcohol consumption."

Jo laughed at me. "I'm in."

"I'm totally up for it." Jen said with a nod, and the boys shook their heads.

"You know what? I think we'll stay out of this." Sam informed us.

Dean nodded slowly. "But we'll have fun watching."

We all sat there either playing poker or pretending to be interested in the game and not the hostilities between all the females. It turned out when you sat all of us down to gamble, things got pretty ugly. Right now the tensions were the highest between Jo and Jen, mainly because I was good at Texas Hold 'Em…not five card stud like Jen…and Jen was winning.

"And the win goes to me." Jen said, practically throwing it in our faces.

I rolled my eyes and then nodded. "She's good at this."

"Really? Then let's up the stakes a bit." Jo replied, not at all about to be intimidated by Jen which made me smile a bit.

"You mean with money? Bring it on, Blondie." Jen told her with a smile on her face.

"I'm out of this." I said, holding my hands up in the air. "Call me a wuss if you must."

Jen turned to me and laughed. "Oh, I must, Lan."

"So be it, Jenny…do your thing." I told her.

"Now don't cheat." Jo warned her, looking at Dean and me mumbling over Jen's shoulder to each other.

Jen snapped at me and Dean, so we stopped talking to each other. "I don't cheat. That cost you, Blondie—now I'm going to play my hardest."

The boys and I sat back as the girls glared at one another, and Ellen handed us beers as we watched. It was going to be an intense game, and if Dean and I kept talking to each other and getting Sam involved, we were all going to get killed…by the as good as pregnant card shark…

xx

A couple hours later, Jen and Jo were actually pretty even with money—Jen was still winning by a good bit—and Ellen made them break it up. They shook hands and we all tried to find some common ground, Ellen eventually making Jo help her, so it was just me, Jen, Sam and Dean looking at each other. Jen and I both knew it was about time to get down to business, and so we looked at the boys and they sighed at us…like they knew what was coming. Actually, they were pretty sure about what was going on with us, but until we actually confessed, they had nothing on us and that was how it was going to stay.

"So…Lan…I think it's time we…had a girl talk." Jen told me, looking at me as the boys assessed our behavior with their eyes.

I nodded slowly and looked from Jen to the boys. "Give us some space, boys?"

Dean raised an eyebrow as Sam got up. "What are you two up to?"

"We just want to talk about boys and…babies…that kind of stuff." I told him, trying so hard not to swallow because Jen's babies or not—my _Godchildren_ or not—I didn't actually _want _to talk about babies.

"We'll give you guys some space." Sam said, smiling at me.

I smiled back. "Thank you."

As they left, I turned to see Jen giving me a stern look and I quickly stopped smiling—it was her business look. On the one hand I was really excited about getting to do something, but on the other hand I was really getting tired of all of this hunting. All hunting did was get my mind off of things for just a little while and eventually I needed to actually deal with my problems…and I didn't want Jen to get hurt.

"So what's with the ghost?" I asked Jen, trying not to think about my problems.

"I'd like to know what's with you and Sam." Jen said, looking at me and giving me a rather stern look.

I shrugged at her. "Well…nothing…there's been some flirting, but nothing. Sam just worries about me because I'm like his sister and I'm with his brother, who he thinks is in love with me and he's protecting him like a good little brother. Dean gave me a promise ring and I'm madly in love with him, I just…I can't get the courage up enough to tell him that I don't think I…so the ghost?"

I grabbed some of the pages that Jen and I had gotten on the man Robert Douglas, who was haunting his house and killing off family members one by one in rather gruesome ways. Mostly I wanted to talk to Jen about how I didn't want to do this anymore, but Jen and I were on a mission and that was that so it was time for business, not catching up. The two of us really badly wanted to get this hunt taken care of and show that we could still do it…even if we both knew it was dangerous.

"So this is a revenge gig?" I asked Jen.

She nodded and took the papers from me. "I did some more research and found out that he was so angry, he staged his entire murder. He got himself killed on purpose, refused to move on, and had ancient symbols planted everywhere. He can't be defeated unless we use our combined powers to banish him—force him to move on."

"Wow…that's one messed up man." I said, shaking my head.

"And we can stop him—just the two of us." Jen added, resting her hand on her stomach.

I nodded slowly. "All right, but please let's keep this to ourselves. I know that we can keep you safe, but Kevin, Sam and Dean won't be too happy about what we're doing and you know it. You really hate lying and I know that, but when Dean gets over protective, things can get a little frustrating."

Jen smiled and nodded. "I know. So what excuse can we use to get away?"

"How about…we need to buy some feminine products for me?" I asked her with a shrug.

Jen laughed loudly. "If it'll work."

"Trust me…it will." I assured her as I laughed a little myself.

The two of us went out of the room and snuck past the boys—thankfully I didn't have to even use my excuse for them. I actually had a feeling that Sam and Dean had been around me enough to know it wasn't my time of the month. Besides, I was off because of the miscarriage and that was a conversation _none _of us actually wanted to have because it still hurt far too much.

"If anything goes truly wrong, you run, and I'll set things up for you to come back safely." I told Jen firmly. "Someday I want you and Kevin to _actually_ have those babies."

She nodded, stroking my hair. "You know for a fact that I would never leave you behind, Lan."

"Damn-it, Jenny," I told her with a loud sigh. "Fine."

The two of us surprisingly made it up to the attic with no problems from the ghost, and I set up the candles rather quickly while Jen muttered ancient words under her breath, both of us beginning to sense the presence of the spirit. He tore at us, and bruised my skin, but Jen stayed pretty resistant—protective and expelling spells were her forte. It was just one more thing that we bonded over, and I was glad to have her safe.

"What are you doing?" The ghost asked harshly.

I joined Jen in muttering the ancient words, and soon there was a loud screaming and then a harsh, shrill sound, and then the ghost was gone, and Jen passed out.

xx

"I can't believe you did that!" Kevin screamed at me.

I was up to here with him. I knew he was mad and he had every right to be, but I wanted to be able to keep hearing for a while, thank you very much. The more he yelled at me, the louder he got, and the more I really wanted to just sit down and talk about this instead of just being yelled at and not getting a word in edge-wise. This was my fault, and deep down I was pretty certain that part of me knew this was going to happen and decided to be reckless…because I was bitter. How could I have put Jen in such danger? I was such a terrible friend.

"Kevin, I know you're mad, but—" I began.

"—there are no 'buts'!" Kevin cried. "She passed out!"

"And I'm fine. If we hadn't done this, no one would have been able to vanquish him. I am fine and it's hot you're protective, babe, but stop." Jen tried to explain to him.

"Good to see you up and about." I told her, going over to her, but Kevin stepped in between us.

"Look, Alana…I'm taking her with me. You're going to stop putting her in danger as of right here and right now. You know why Dean paid for me to come out here? Because he understands how I felt and he would have expected me to do the same for him if the roles were reversed and it was you that was in potential danger." Kevin explained to me forcefully. "You lost a _baby_ to this job, Lana, and I want you to remember that when you drag Jen into things like this."

Jen jumped in and I really wished that she hadn't. "Kevin, you're over-reacting. Lana is the Godmother of any kids we have in the future—know that going in. She could have used that spell of hers to stop the scratches and bruises, but she didn't—secretly she protected me. Kevin, this job comes with dangers—but you have to deal with it."

"Jenny, I can't lose you." Kevin protested, looking at her.

Jen kissed him and he smiled a little and I found myself almost completely unable to take it because that's what _I_ wanted. I just wanted to be pregnant—to have Dean's baby back in my stomach and Dean slowly coming around. I was just going to continue to get older, and I was going to become a bitter hunter because I was never going to get to have a family of my own and Jen and Kevin would…this was really messing with my head.

"You're not going to lose me." She assured him.

"We are going to go home though." Kevin ordered, smiling at her.

I smiled and went over to her, kissing her cheek swiftly. "I'll call."

Jen nodded. "I know."

After they left, Sam and Dean both gave me quite the earful about what I had done and how I shouldn't have been so reckless, and then Sam hugged me. I honestly hadn't been expecting it, and I really needed it. So I hugged him back, and then he went to grab us some dinner, leaving me with Dean, Dean of whom knew that Kevin had ratted him out by the look on his face.

"So…you would expect Kevin to rat Jen and I out if I ran off to hunt without you?" I asked him slowly, reaching out to take a hold of his belt and pulling him toward me. "It's kind of romantic even though it's you know…a little annoying that you went behind my back to the Big Bad Kevin Wolf."

Dean chuckled a little bit. "You call him that behind his back?"

"Since grade school." I admitted with a laugh. "Thank you for being protective, but if you're ever the reason that I get yelled at by Kevin again, it's no sex for a week."

"Like you can last that long," Dean said rolling his eyes.

I laughed and smiled. "Try me."

Instead, Dean kissed me lovingly and when Sam got back, we ate, got packed up and had a nice night of sleep, waking up and heading out the next morning because Sam felt we should move on. We ended up trying to do a hunt that didn't actually end up panning out and a week after the incident with Jen, Sam had other plans on his mind and Dean and I were a little iffy about the place he particularly wanted to go.

The thing was I wasn't sure if I could handle going with them to their mother's grave for more reasons than just the one. Not only did I know that she was friends with my birth mother as a teenager and up until she died, but it was a little hard to swallow already, all the death, but how could I deny letting Sam go and pay a visit to his mother? She gave birth to him and Dean, Sam never got to actually know her, and it only made sense that he would want to see her now that John was gone too.

"Come on Sam, I'm begging you—this is stupid." Dean protested, really not wanting to face any of his problems either.

Sam looked at his brother from the passenger seat. "Why?"

"Visiting Mom's grave? She doesn't even have a grave. There was no body left after the fire." Dean tried, desperate to get out of this.

"She has a headstone." Sam replied, nodding a little.

"Yeah, put up by an uncle—a man we've never even met." Dean told him. "So you wanna go give your respects to a slab of granite put up by a stranger?"

Sam sighed as I swallowed. "Dean, that's not the point."

"Then enlighten me, Sam." Dean told him.

"It's not about a body, or a casket, Dean…it's about her memory." I explained, understanding why Sam wanted to do this. "The least you could do is just cut Sammy some slack and let him do this."

"Mmmm," Dean muttered.

Sam smiled at me and then nodded at his brother. "And after Dad, it just—it just feels like the right thing to do."

"It's irrational is what it is." Dean said in an annoyed tone.

"Look, Man, no one asked you to come." Sam reminded him.

In fact it was the truth—Sam had mentioned what he wanted to do and Dean and I didn't really want to be alone because one of us would bring up the baby and my irrational behavior with Jen. Neither of us was facing anything, and we hadn't even really been speaking much which was kind of disconcerting—but he was being faithful. I had expected him to be, but at the same time, I was a little worried about how he was acting, and how I was acting…our relationship was a little rocky even though it wasn't exactly about our _relationship_.

"Why don't we swing by the Roadhouse instead? We haven't heard anything about the demon lately. We should be hunting that son of a bitch down." Dean suggested, hoping Sam would let us turn around.

"You're right—you should. Just drop me off, I'll hitch a ride, and meet you there tomorrow." Sam told him, not backing down.

"Right," Dean scoffed, and then he looked defeated. "Stuck with those people. Making awkward small talk until you show up. No thanks. Lanni would try and get them to play poker, and then her hustling them would end in a bar fight and we'd get kicked out anyway."

I smiled and laughed a little. "I guess we're off to the cemetery then since I'd rather not get my boyfriend's beautiful face broken by a big burly hunter with a 'Shelly' tattoo on his huge right bicep."

"What in the world?" Sam asked me as he laughed, Dean letting out a chuckle too.

I just shrugged and started to say it again, but the mood was already lightened and we headed straight for the cemetery. When we got there, Sam went off to his mother's gravestone, and I wandered around for a bit looking at all the other headstones while Dean looked around too. He was stopped by one that said, 'Loving Father', and I didn't want to disturb him.

To give him his space, I took a couple of steps in an opposite direction, but I stopped when I ran across a 'Loving Son' one…for a five year-old. I swallowed the lump rising in my throat and tried to tell myself that the kid had gotten to live a bit, but it hurt too much. Dean rested his hand on my shoulder and took a breath, but I shook my head so he wouldn't speak and looked up, pointing at a dead tree, me walking over to it first, Dean following me.

"Look at this circle of death around her grave." Dean told me. "And this flower—half of it is alive."

I nodded and looked at him. "Go talk to the groundskeeper."

"Already on it," he replied, and headed off as Sam came over.

"What's this about?" Sam asked me.

I pointed to the circle. "The perfect circle of death."

"Angela Mason. She was a student at the local college. Her funeral was three days ago." Dean told us as he came back over.

"And?" Sam asked him.

"And?" Dean repeated. "You saw her grave. Everything dead around it, in a perfect circle. You don't think that's a little weird?"

Sam nodded a little. "Maybe the grounds keeper went a little agro with the pesticide."

"No, I asked him. I asked him: no pesticide, no chemicals—nobody can explain it." Dean told him.

"Okay. So, what are you thinking?" Sam asked him, giving me a look because I was apparently being a bad influence on him and helping him to be distracted, but I thought it was a hunt too.

Dean shrugged at him. "I don't know…unholy ground, maybe."

"Un—" Sam started repeating, surprised, but he stopped.

"What? If something evil happened there, it could easily poison the ground." I protested.

Dean nodded, glad to have the back-up, but Sam looked secretly annoyed with both of us and our way of retreating lately. The two of us were trying so hard to keep our minds elsewhere, even if I really just wanted to go back to my home and try and do something with my life. With hunting, came creepy ghost children, and children having their parent's murdered—or being murdered themselves—I didn't _want_ to deal with it.

"Remember the farm outside of Cedar Rapids?" Dean asked Sam.

Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah."

"It could be the sign of a demonic presence…" Dean said to Sam, who seemed pretty skeptical at this point.

"Or Angela's spirit, if it's powerful enough." I added, and then Sam didn't answer and headed for the car.

Dean was annoyed with his brother. "Well, don't get too excited, you might pull something."

"It's just…stumbling onto a hunt…here…of all places?" Sam pointed out, also annoyed but handling it a lot better.

"So?" Dean asked him.

"So," Sam repeated, "are you sure this is about a hunt, not about something else?"

Dean gave Sam a look. "What else would it be about?"

"You know? Just forget it." Sam brushed it off, even though I knew part of him was upset that only _he_ had talked to his mother's gravestone.

"Believe what you want, Sam, but I let you drag my ass out here. The least we can do is check this out." Dean told him angrily.

Sam sighed and nodded. "Yeah, fine."

"The girl's dad works in town—he's a professor at the school." Dean explained to him.

"Yeah…fine." Sam agreed.

"Do you two always have to fight?" I asked as them, really wanting to move past this already

Dean shot me a look as the engine turned over. "We're not fighting."

Sam and I sighed and then got into the car and went to pay Angela's father, Dr. Mason, our condolences. He let us in after we used our real names, and Sam and I sat with him while Dean looked around. Sam and I were both pretty certain that Dean was _not_ going to make this a very easy visit, but he really wanted to get to the bottom of this and I did too.

"This is an unusual book." Dean said, showing the book he found to Dr. Mason.

Dr. Mason nodded at him. "It's Ancient Greek. I teach a course."

"So, a car accident, that's…that's horrible." Dean told him, and I tried really hard not to reach over and pinch him because it was kind of rude.

"Angie was only a mile away from home when…" Dr. Mason began, but he trailed off.

"It's got to be hard, losing someone like that." I said genuinely, smiling that Lana smile at him.

Dean nodded at that. "Sometimes it's like they're still around…almost like you can still sense their presence. You ever feel anything like that?"

"I do as a matter of fact." Dr. Mason admitted.

"That's perfectly normal, Dr. Mason." Sam told him, but I could tell by the tone in his voice and the look on his face that the words were meant for Dean. "Especially with what you're going through."

"You know, I still phone her…and the phone's ringing before I remember that, uh…family's everything, you know? Angie was the most important thing in my life and now I'm just lost without her." Dr. Mason explained.

Sam nodded and gave a soft smile. "I'm very sorry."

"If there's anything you need, just ask." I assured him, even though I knew there was nothing that I could do for him.

He had lost his little girl, and nothing could bring her back and somehow he was going to have to learn to live with that. On top of it, Sam and I were annoyed that Dean was showing absolutely no compassion, and after a couple more kind words to Dr. Mason, we went back to the motel. I was still pretty sure we had a case here, but at the same time, none of the pieces were truly falling into place.

"There's something here, we just haven't found it yet." Dean argued as Sam washed his face.

Sam reached for a towel. "Dean, so far you have a patch of dead grass and nothing."

"Something turned that grave into unholy ground." Dean told his brother angrily.

"There's no reason for it to be unholy ground. Angela Mason was a nice girl who died in a car crash. That isn't exactly vengeful spirit material. You heard her father." Sam explained, looking at his brother as he came out of the bathroom.

Dean scoffed. "Yeah, well maybe Daddy doesn't know everything there is to know about his little Angel."

I sighed loudly and the two of them looked at me as I sat on the end of one of the beds, really hating where this conversation was going. We were all pretty high strung and none of us were in good moods and this was going to tears us apart more than it was going to bring us together. I guess we should have known that eventually we could no longer hide all of our feelings behind random hunts.

Sam sighed too and looked at Dean as Dean flipped through John's journal. "You know what we never should have bothered that poor man."

"There's one point I agree on." I told Sam, and Dean shot me a look, but before I could say that I believed something was up, Sam spoke up again.

"We shouldn't even be here anymore." Sam admitted, resting his hands on his hips and looking at Dean.

"What are you saying, Sam? That we should just bail without even figuring out what's going on?" Dean asked, cocking his head and shaking it.

Sam chose his words carefully. "I think I know what's going on here…it's the only reason I've gone along with you this far.

"What are you talking about?" Dean asked him.

"Sam…" I warned.

"This is about Mom's grave." Sam said confidently.

Dean scoffed and looked down at the ground. "Got nothing to do with it."

"You wouldn't step within 100 yards of it." He said, as Dean looked a bit miffed. "Look, maybe you're imagining a hunt where there isn't one so you don't have to think about Mom…or Dad."

Dean looked up at Sam rather angrily, and I stood up just in case I would have to get in between the two of them. I had seen Dean hit Sam once before and I really didn't want anything in the room to get physical even though Sam was fighting back emotionally. Neither of them were seeing eye to eye, and I desperately wanted to be the mediator, but I didn't know what to do.

Sam sighed at Dean and nodded a little. "You wanna take another swing? Go ahead if it will make you feel better."

"I don't need this crap." Dean said, and then he moved and grabbed his phone and his keys, and Sam sighed.

"Dean, where are you going?" Sam asked him, both of us watching Dean head for the door.

"I'm going to get a drink. Alone." Dean said angrily, and then he opened the door and slammed it behind him.

I went for my jacket too. "I'm going to go and talk to him. There really might be something here, Sammy…even if he's desperately just looking for a hunt."

"I'm more willing to believe you than him right now, but I really don't think anything is here." Sam rubbed his temples. "She doesn't fit _any_ of the characteristics of an angry spirit, Lan, and you know it."

"We're just not digging deep enough." I replied.

Sam and I paused and I knew what he was going to say next. "That…or you're hiding something too."

I sighed and then I kissed his cheek softly, pulling on my jacket and going out to catch Dean before he turned on the car. I rapped my knuckles on his window and I knew he knew it was me out of the corner of his eye, so he paused, his eyes fixed on the steering wheel. After a moment though, he rolled the window down and I smiled a little, trying to be as calm as I could about it all.

"Can I come?" I asked him.

Dean looked at the steering wheel and then at me. "Why?"

"Cause I believe there's a hunt, and you know you like having me around, even when you're pissed." I told him, smiling even though I didn't really feel like smiling.

"Get in." He nodded.

As I got in the car, I put my hand on his and he sighed a little. "Look, we could go get a drink and then we can check out Angela's place. There's bound to be more clues there, but you look like you need a beer."

Dean looked at me and we locked eye contact, both of us aware that this was something we could count on—the understanding we had with each other. Still, we were both in this hunt for a different reason and neither of us wanted to discuss it…no matter how happy we felt even for a second just being together.

"Why do you do this?" He asked me.

I looked at him and smiled a little. "Why do I do what?"

"Why do you make me so weak?" He asked with a sad smile that came on his face and then disappeared.

I smiled a little. "It's my job. Let's go."

He nodded, and we stopped to get a couple beers at the local bar, which seemed to be crawling with people. At first, Dean and I just ordered a couple of beers and then we decided that it was time to go ahead and try and get our minds off of our pain before heading to Angela's—that's when I pointed out the pool table. I thought that it was important that we do something fun and then get back down to business and hide whatever feelings we wanted to hide.

"I don't really make you weak…do I?" I asked him slowly as I racked up the balls.

Dean shook his head as he drank a bit of his beer. "You make me feel stronger than ever…there's just moments when I feel like I'm caving. You're becoming one of my weak spots, Lanni…I can't lose you."

"Baby, only way you could lose me is if you sent me away," I assured him, kissing him tenderly. "You're stuck with me."

"Good," Dean responded with a nod, and then he broke with the cue ball.

It was a fun game—I totally kicked his ass—and after a little bit of public groping and making out, we headed to Angela's address and we went to her house to do the hunt. We looked around a bit, and then a girl showed up and she ran into the room she had come out of, and then threatened to call 911. That's what Dean and I got for going ahead and trying to do this without Sammy.

"I'm Angela's cousin!" Dean cried out to her.

"What?" The girl asked, and she was more willing to talk now.

Dean nodded and I smiled a little. "Yeah, her father sent me over to pick up her stuff. My name's Alan—Alan Stanwick."

"Her Dad never told me you were coming." She said, poking her head out of the room.

"Yeah, well…how else would I have the key to your place?" He asked, and then he chuckled and I was pretty happy that he could think on his feet like that.

She nodded slowly and then looked at me. "And you are?"

"His girlfriend—I just thought I'd lend a hand." I explained and smiled at her.

She nodded and then got dressed to come and talk to us, and started crying everywhere when we asked her about things—turns out her name was Lindsay and she was Angela's best friend. All she would tell us was how great Angela was, and cry some more. Dean kept handing her tissues, and then we heard about how Angela's boyfriend Matt had slit his own throat and had been seeing her everywhere before he died…that was the freaky part…and definitely up our alley of things.

"Were Angela and Matt a happy couple? I mean…was there any reason that Angela would be angry with him?" Dean asked her.

Lindsay shook her head. "What? No, of course not. Why do you ask?"

"Just asking," he answered before asking her where Matt lived.

With that, Dean and I thanked her, and gathered some of her things before we left, and went to Matt's place to look around before going back to the motel. When we walked in, I heard something about 'Casa Caliente IV' and I stopped walking as Dean went ahead of me as Sam looked up from having rapidly turned off the television. Dean gave him a look and Sam looked startled as I raised my eyebrows at him.

"What?" Sam asked us.

"Awkward." Dean told him before walking the rest of the way in the room to get more dressed down.

Sam nodded and then looked at Dean as I came further into the room too. "Where the Hell were you two?"

"Just working our imaginary case." Dean retorted and he was annoyed and I sighed again.

"Yeah? And?" Sam asked as I put my brave face on and flopped back on the bed.

Dean nodded at him. "Oh, well, you were right. I didn't find much. Yeah, except Angela's boyfriend died last night, slit his own throat but you know, that's normal. Uh, see, what else? Oh, he was seeing Angela everywhere before he died. But, you know, I'm sure that's just me transferring my own feelings."

"Okay, I get it. I'm sorry, maybe there is something going on." Sam said dismally.

"_Maybe_? Sam, I know how to do my job despite what you might think." Dean told him.

"We should check out the guy's apartment." Sam suggested.

I sat up. "We just came from there: a pile of dead plants, just like the cemetery."

"Hell, a dead goldfish, too." Dean added with a chuckle.

"So, unholy ground?" Sam asked us.

"Maybe. I'm still not getting that powerful angry-spirit vibe from Angela. I've been reading this, though." Dean added showing Sam a journal.

Sam gave Dean a look. "You stole the girl's diary?"

"Yeah, Sam…and if anything, the girl's a little _too_ nice." Dean explained, a mischievous smile on his face.

"I told him not to, but you can't stop this one from doing anything if his mind is set to it." I told Sam with a shrug. "Even so, Dean and I want to do some more digging and talk to more of her friends."

Sam sighed and nodded. "You get any names?"

"You kidding me? I have her 'bestest friend in the whole wide world'." Dean said, and threw the diary at Sam.

We took a little bit to go through Angela's diary, and then after a little while we decided to go and see Neal and pretend we were grief counselors. I smiled at Neal when he opened up the door, and I was pretty certain that we could get through this…I was pretty certain Neal would talk to us. Besides…my vibes were going haywire…this guy knew more than he was letting on…and it got more and more obvious as Sam put the act into effect.

"Grief can make people do crazy things." Sam told Neal.

Neal nodded, but didn't seem convinced. "Look, I'm sorry about what happened to him—I am—but if Matt killed himself, it wasn't 'cause of grief."

"No? Then why?" I asked him slowly.

"It was guilt. Angie's death was Matt's fault and he knew it." Neal replied without skipping a beat.

Sam raised his eyebrows. "How was Matt responsible?"

"She really loved that guy but the night of the accident, she walked in on him with another girl. She was really torn up…that's why she crashed the car." Neal added and then he thanked us for our concern and went back inside his house.

So we headed down the walkway to the car and leaned on it, and Dean pressed the angry spirit thing. I was getting a little sick and tired of Sam and Dean pushing each other's buttons, but I didn't want to deal with it, so I stepped in instead. It was best Dean argue with me than argue with Sam as far as I was concerned by now.

"So, if Angela got her revenge on Matt, you think it's over?" Sam asked Dean before I opened my mouth to speak.

"Well, there's one way to be sure." He replied, and then he got into the car and Sam and I followed suit.

I swallowed. "Dean…do we _have_ to burn the bones? I mean she's going to be a ripe, rotting body in a coffin…not _bones_."

"Since when are you afraid to get dirty, huh?" Dean asked, and we sat in silence as Dean drove us back to the motel.

That night, we went to the cemetery to burn the bones even though I was totally against it now, but when we actually got to the coffin and lifted the lid, we saw that Angela's body wasn't in there—nothing was. So much for the angry spirit theory. It was starting to look more and more like what was going on with Angela was more like raising her from the dead…it was more like zombie action—without the eating people's brains.

"What's with you taking both sides?" Dean asked, wrapping his arms around me like any other night.

I took a breath and snuggled my back into his chest. "Because I understand it from both points of view. Do you have a problem with that?"

"No, I just…I was hoping you'd take my side because there's a hunt there." Dean explained, and I knew that part of it was because I was his girlfriend too.

"I _am_ on your side…I'm just on Sam's too. I know that sucks, but come on, Dean, you and I are _both_ doing this for an ulterior motive. Damn-it, don't turn over!" I told him, hearing Sam sigh as Dean pulled his arms away and turned so his back was to me.

I sighed and whispered that I loved him, kissing the back of his head and slipping my arms around him instead. I was glad that he let me, and then the three of us fell into a silence and it felt oddly awkward to me. The three of us very rarely had awkward silences with each _other_, but I tried to push the thoughts from my mind as we fell asleep, knowing we had more to do in the morning.

xx

The next morning, we headed to Dr. Mason's house to ask him some more questions because we needed to figure out where Angela's body actually was. Either the death had been faked, or someone had risen her from the dead, and that was our kind of gig. Actually…that meant this was going to be a really _annoying_ and _disturbing_ kind of our kind of gig.

"Dean, take it easy, okay?" Sam asked him as Dean knocked on the door hard.

"You're Angie's friends." Dr. Mason said when he opened the door.

"Dr. Mason—" Sam began.

"—we need to talk…about Angela." Dean interrupted him, making me make a face.

Dr. Mason nodded. "Well, come in."

"You teach Ancient Greek. Tell me," Dean asked, holding out the paper he used to write the symbols we saw on the coffin lid down, "what are these?"

"I don't understand." Dr. Mason answered. "You said this had something to do with Angela?"

Dean looked rather annoyed. "It does. Please, just humor me."

"They're part of an ancient Greek divination ritual." Dr. Mason replied.

"Used for necromancy, right?" I asked calmly before Dean could open his big mouth.

Dr, Mason nodded at me. "That's right."

"See, before we came over here, we stopped by the library and did a little homework ourselves. Apparently, they use rituals like this one for communicating with the dead, even bringing corpses back to life…full-on zombie action." Dean said hostilely.

"Yeah, I mean, according to the legends. Now, what's all this about?" Dr. Mason asked us.

Dean stared Dr. Mason down. "I think you know."

"Dean." Sam said sternly.

"Look, I get it. Okay? There are people that I would give anything to see again, but what gives you the right?" Dean asked him, getting rather upset.

"Dean!" Sam intervened.

Dr. Mason really didn't know what we were talking about. "What are you talking about?"

"What is dead should stay dead!" Dean cried, and I knew this was personal.

"What?" Dr. Mason asked.

I grabbed Dean's arm. "Stop it!"

"What you brought back isn't even your daughter anymore! These things are vicious—they're violent! They're so nasty they rot the ground around them. I mean, come on! Haven't you seen 'Pet Cemetery'?" Dean asked him in a loud, angry voice.

"You're insane." Dr. Mason replied and he headed for his phone.

Dean apparently wasn't done and jerked his arm free from my grasp. "Where is she?"

"Get out of my house." He answered as he dialed a phone number.

"I know you're hiding her somewhere." Dean told him, snatching the phone from him. "Where is she?"

"Dean, stop! That's enough!" I told him harshly.

Sam stepped into the conversation. "Dean, look: beautiful, living plants. We're leaving."

"I'm calling the police." Dr. Mason warned us.

"Sir, we're sorry. We won't bother you again." Sam promised and I nodded in agreement before we left the house.

Once out of Dr. Mason's house, Sam and I whirled on Dean because his behavior had been _completely_ uncalled for. What the Hell had he been thinking going off like that with absolutely no proof to back himself up?

"What the Hell's the matter with you Dean?" Sam asked him.

"Back off." Dean replied angrily.

I shook my head and held my hand up to Sam. "That man is innocent! He didn't deserve that! Where the _Hell_ do you get off blaming him out of the blue with no proof? We just terrorized a poor man who lost his daughter for nothing! Nothing, Dean! What the Hell is wrong with you?"

"Okay, so she's not here—maybe he's keeping her somewhere else." Dean told us.

"Stop it! That's enough, okay? Enough!" Sam cried.

Dean was very upset with us. "Guys, I know what I'm doing."

"No, you don't…at all. Dean, I don't scare easy, but, man, you're scaring the crap out of me." Sam told his brother lovingly. "Hell you set Lan off and she's been nothing but a faithful girlfriend this whole time. She's _always_ on your side."

"Don't be overdramatic, Sam." Dean replied and then shook his head. "For your information she's on _everyone's_ side."

Sam wasn't done. "You're lucky this turned out to be a real case 'cause if it wasn't you would have found something else to kill."

"Sam, not now." I said, rubbing my temples.

"What?" Dean asked angrily.

Sam didn't take my warning to heart. "You're on edge, you're erratic—except for when you're hunting—'cause then you're downright scary. You're tail spinning, man, and you refuse to talk about it, and you won't let Lan and I help you."

"I can take care of myself, thanks." Dean replied bitterly.

"No, you can't! And you know what? You're the only one who thinks you should have to. You don't have to handle this on your own, Dean. No one can." Sam coaxed him and I reached out to rest my hand on his shoulder, but Dean was really tense and really upset.

"If you bring up Dad's death one more time, I swear…" Dean said, clenching his fist.

Sam sighed loudly. "Please, Dean, it's killing you. Please. We've already lost Dad. We've lost Mom. I've lost Jessica. You and Lan lost the baby…and now, am I gonna lose you, too?"

"We better get out of here before the cops come." Dean replied, changing the subject. "I hear you, okay? I'm being an ass and I'm sorry, but right now we got a freaking zombie running around. We need to figure out how to kill it…right?"

"Our lives are weird, man." Sam said softly.

"You're telling me. Come on." Dean told him, and we went to the motel.

There were so many things that I wanted to say, but honestly I wasn't very certain I could get them to come out without sounding as angry as I was. I understood that Dean was going through a tough time, but I was too…we both needed Sam to help us through this, but at least _I_ was admitting that. Dean and I were both being reckless and I didn't realize that until I had actually taken Jen on that hunt…Dean hadn't realized yet just how much help he needed, and was instead focusing on ways to get rid of Angela.

"We can't just waste her with a head shot?" Dean asked us.

"Dude, you've been watching way too many Romero flicks." Sam replied.

Dean sighed loudly. "You're telling me there's no lore on how to smoke them?"

"No, Dean, I'm telling you there's too much. I mean, there's a hundred different legends on the walking dead, but they all have different methods for killing them—some say setting them on fire." I replied, rubbing my temples.

"One said…where is it?" Sam said, flipping to a page in the journal. "Right here…feeding their hearts to wild dogs. That's my personal favorite, but who knows what's real and what's myth?"

Dean sighed too. "Is there anything they all have in common?"

"No, but a few said silver might work." I replied and leaned back in the chair I was in. "Silver's a start."

"Yeah, but now how are we gonna find Angela?" Sam asked us.

Dean gave Sam a look. "We got to figure out the person who brought her back."

"Any ideas?" Sam asked.

"I think it was Neal, but only because I got a vibe from him, I have no proof." I suggested and smiled when Dean agreed with me.

"Lana may not have anymore proof, but you got your journal, I got mine." Dean said, and then opened up a passage from Angela's diary and read it out loud. "'Neal's a real shoulder to cry on. He so understands what I'm going through with Matt.' There's more here where that came from—it's got unrequited ducky love written all over it."

Sam made a face. "Yeah, but that doesn't mean he brought her back from the dead."

"Except that isn't he Professor Mason's T.A.?" I asked Dean.

Dean nodded and gave me a smile. "And he has access to all the same books."

Sam agreed with us then, and once he was on board, we headed over to Neal's place and knocked on the front door. When he didn't answer, we went inside and started exploring the house, going down into his cellar and I stopped for a moment. It was pretty obvious that my vibes from this place were totally not off.

"She's been here…I can feel her presence." I explained to them, pushing my bangs out of my face.

Dean nodded at me. "That's good enough for me."

"You think Angela's gone after somebody?" Sam asked us.

"No, I think she went out to rent 'Beaches'." Dean told him sarcastically.

Sam glared at him. "Look, smartass, she might kill someone. We got to find her, Dean."

"Yeah…alright, she, uh…she clipped Matt because he was cheating, right?" Dean asked us, trying to put it together and my eyes lit up when I knew what he was getting at. "Well, it takes two to you know, to have hard-core sex. I don't know it just seemed that Angela's roommate was broken up over Matt's death. I mean, like _really_ broken up."

"Almost broken up enough to be the one that he cheated with…" I told them slowly. "We better get back over there, now."

We hurried over to Angela and Lindsay's place, just in time to see Angela about to stab Lindsay, and Dean shot Angela in the back. She turned towards him, got another silver bullet in her, and then escaped through the window. Dean started following her, but came back almost immediately.

"Damn, that dead chick can run!" Dean explained to us.

"We should get back to Neal then." I told them dismally and they agreed.

Sam spoke up on the way there. "So, the silver bullets, they did something, right?"

"Yeah, something, but not enough. What else you got?" Dean asked him.

Sam took a breath. "Um, okay, besides silver, we have 'nailing the undead back into their grave beds'. It's mentioned a few times—it's probably where the whole vampire-staking lore came from."

"If you remember correctly, on the ancient vamps, that works quite nicely." I told them with a nod. "So we should try that."

"Their grave beds? You're serious?" Dean asked us and when Sam and I nodded, he sighed. "How the Hell are we gonna get Angela back to the cemetery?"

I smiled a little. "That's where persuasion and good looks come in. Now before you ask, just don't. I have this part of it covered, so all _we_ gotta do is get back to Neal before Angela does, and put my plan into effect. If this works, Neal is safe, Angela goes back to being dead, and we get to leave town."

The boys decided to take my word for it and we headed to Neal's, him actually being there this time. He wasn't going to be happy about this if he was _truly_ in love with her, but this was the way it was going to have to be, so he was going to have to deal. Besides, if push came to shove, I'd just use my powers…and see if that worked.

"What are you doing here?" Neal asked us.

"You know I've heard of some people doing some pretty desperate things to get laid but you, you take the cake." Dean told him, shaking his head.

Neal made a face. "Who are you…really?"

"Ask Angela. We know you brought her back and don't even try to pull the 'crazy' card on us cause we're not falling for it this time—we're not stupid." I explained to him.

"Your girlfriend's past her expiration date and _we're_ crazy? When someone's gone, they should stay gone. You don't mess with that kind of stuff." Dean told him.

"Angela killed Matt, she tried to kill Lindsay." Sam added to try and convince him.

Neal shook his head slowly, putting on a face. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Hey, no more crap, Neal!" Dean ordered, seizing him by his shirt. "This blood is on your hands. Now me, and them can make this right, but you got to tell us where she is. Tell us!"

Neal was obviously scared of Dean, and he should have been. "My house. She's at my house."

"You sure about that?" Dean asked him after noticing the dead plants when I nudged him and moved my head in the direction of them.

"Listen," I said after looking at the cellar door, "it doesn't really matter where she is. There's only one way to stop her: we've got to perform another ritual over her grave to reverse the one that you did. We're going to need some black roots, some scar weed, some candles—it's very complicated but it will get the job done, and she'll be dead again in a couple of hours. I think you should come with us. I'm serious, Neal…leave with us, right now."

Neal shook his head. "No…no."

"Listen to me," Dean added in a low voice when I was done with the plan. "Get out of here as soon as you can, but most of all be cool. No sudden movements…don't make her mad. Let's go." He told us, and we took off for the cemetery.

When we got there, I set to getting the candles out of my bag and setting them up in a circle, lighting them for this made-up ritual. It wasn't a real one, but I had some magic on my side if things went _too_ wrong. All I wanted was to get this over with and actually go home…I just wanted to go back home. Speaking of home…

"So, you really think this will work?" Sam asked me as my phone rang.

I shrugged slowly. "I don't know actually, but it's the best one we've got."

"There's no actual ritual for it then?" Dean asked, reaching out and absent-mindedly stroking my hair.

I shook my head. "And if there is, I don't know the first thing about performing it." I was distracted suddenly when my phone rang. "Hey, Jenny!"

"Lan! Hey…um…this is going to sound so terrible but…would you consider giving up your new life for a little while to come and be with me? Kevin is taking longer hours and my parents have their own lives and…I miss you and the old days. I know it's selfish because Sam and Dean are your family and they just lost their father but—" Jen was saying.

"—I hear you, Jenny, I do. I'll be home as soon as we take care of this undead girl. I'll call you back, we hear something and Sam is going off to check on it and I need to be focused. I love you." I told her, and then hung up when she said 'goodbye' and I turned to Dean. "Amazing isn't it? The length people go to so they won't end up alone."

Dean nodded slowly. "You're telling me."

Before we could say anything else, we saw Sam running towards us, and then Angela caught up with him, pinning him to the ground, Sam's hand violently hitting the ground. She was about to wring his neck when Dean fired a full round of bullets at her, and she lost her balance, falling into her open coffin. Dean jumped in after her and literally nailed her in, me hurrying to Sam.

"What's dead should stay dead." Dean said as I checked Sam's hurt hand.

Sam assured me that he was all right and I smiled at him and kissed his cheek, stroking it softly and then looking over as Dean got out of her coffin. It seemed to work, so we reburied her and Sam turned to me, reaching out and tugging on my pony-tail. I scrunched up my nose making a playful face, and Sam chuckled a little before he spoke.

"That was a good plan, but did we have to use me as bait? I think she broke my hand." Sam told me, pouting a little.

Dean stepped in, obviously annoyed with the flirting. "When that part came up, I knew Lana couldn't be bait, so I figured you were more her type, you know? She had pretty crappy taste in guys."

It began to be morning, and Dean took one last look at his mother's headstone while we got ready to leave, dialing Jen's number. Sam looked over at her and sighed a little, wanting to talk to his brother, but Dean not wanting to deal with it. Still, Sam was going to ask him if that was what he wanted, and I wasn't going to stop him from doing that…just as long as I got my ass back to Kansas soon to be there for Jen.

"We could stay." Sam offered.

"No." Dean told him, and we got into the car and drove.

We were headed for Kansas, and as we drove along the open road, Dean pulled over and got out, and Sam and I followed him. It looked like Dean was on the verge of having a breakdown, and so I stood next to him as leaned on the hood of the car, Sam leaning on the car too, on his other side.

"Dean, what is it?" Sam asked softly as I took Dean's hand and he squeezed mine in response.

"I'm sorry." Dean replied.

I smiled sadly at him. "For what?"

"The way I've been acting...and for Dad. Well, he was your Dad, too, Sammy. It's my fault that he's gone." Dean explained.

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked him.

I nodded. "Dean, you can't blame yourself for what happened to your father."

"I know you two have been thinking it so don't give me that—I've been thinking it too. Doesn't take a genius to figure it out. Back at the hospital, I had a full recovery. It was a miracle…and five minutes later, Dad's dead and the Colt's gone." Dean pointed out.

"Dean…" I began slowly, running my thumb along his hand.

"You can't tell me there's not a connection there. I don't know how the demon was involved, I don't know how the whole thing went down exactly…but Dad's dead because of me, and that much I do know." Dean explained to us.

Sam shook his head. "We don't know that, not for sure."

"Sam…you, Lana and Dad…you're the most important people in my life, and now…I never should have come back, Sam. It wasn't natural and now look what's come of it. I was dead…and I should have stayed dead. You wanted to know how I was feeling. Well, that's it. So tell me…what could you possibly say to make that all right?" He added, crying.

I wiped away a tear and the three of us sat there in silence: this was a big step and in order to move further, Dean and I had to stop coddling each other. So after a few more minutes sitting in silence, we all piled back in the car and got back to Kansas, me heading straight for Jen's and leaving Sam and Dean in my house. She and I spent the night talking and then I headed back to the house, Dean a little antsy about going on another hunt but I didn't want to fight.

I waited for two whole days, and when Sam and Dean caught wind of another hunt and wanted to head out, I just sat there in the living room and Sam swallowed. He knew what was coming and I knew that Dean did too, but Dean wasn't going to let me stay without a fight and I loved him for that. It was just…it was just that he and I had to stop being each other's crutch.

"I'm not going." I told them, shaking my head and standing up, rubbing my thighs through my jeans.

Dean looked at me and our eyes met. "What are you talking about?"

"I'm just going to…" Sam trailed off.

"No, Sammy…" I tried, but trailed off when he headed out the front door. "Dean…"

Dean shook his head. "Why are you doing this?"

"Because I can't do this, Dean. You and I are on a downward spiral right now and we need help, and Jen and I both think its time that I put my life back together. I mean I almost got my best friend _killed_…while she was _trying to get pregnant_. I'm not over this, and I'm not getting through this right now…I lost a baby, and I lost your Dad, and you and I are wrecks and we're coddling each other…you shouldn't have stayed here with me. You should have taken off the second you knew about the hunt." I explained, tears in my eyes.

"Lanni, I don't _want_ to be out there without you." Dean explained to me, cupping my face with his hands. "Baby, I want to be here for you like you're here for me."

I swallowed. "Dean, you want to hunt…you want to hunt and you're amazing at it, and you're a hero, and I want you to keep hunting because that's what you want more than anything. You have your mother's and your father's deaths to avenge and I need a break from the supernatural…I need a chance to properly grieve and heal."

"Baby…"

"I think its time that we took some time apart." I told him, taking a step back and wiping my tears away. "I need some time to myself and you hunt…you're _good_ at it."

Dean nodded and kissed me swiftly. "You can't grieve with me?"

"Dean…you and Sam should go and hunt." I explained to him. "I'll still be here when you're done, and you're always welcome here."

Dean just nodded and went to the door, not aware of the crushing feeling in my chest as he closed the door behind him without so much as a glance in my direction…

**Note: Sorry about all of the angst, but it's kind of needed in the story right now. Next chapter has a lot of fun in it so I hope you're prepared for some comedy, romance and a twist Also, it'll be in different POVs, with just a smidge of sadness. Man, this is _30_ pages! I'm proud of it. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	5. We're Better Together

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Dean's POV**

"Are you sure you're all right, Dean? I mean you can miss her." Sam told me.

I sighed loudly. "Sam…don't even start."

"I know you're annoyed Dean, and I know it hurts to be away from her, but you gave her a promise ring, Dean…why'd you just leave?" Sam asked me. "You should have fought a little harder for her."

I sighed again because I was aware that he was trying to get me to realize I needed her and to go back and get her but I couldn't. Lana had made it clear to me that she needed space from me and I had to let her have that space. I loved her, and I was finally at peace with that even though I never really said it with those words out loud, but I'd done some things I wasn't proud of with her gone and now I couldn't even bring myself to talk to her—I kept handing Sam the phone and letting _him_ handle it when she called me.

"Sammy…" I told him, taking a breath.

Sam nodded from the passenger seat. "She'll forgive you for the waitress, Dean—I'm not sure she'll forgive me for letting you alone long enough to almost get laid when you're _still dating_ her…but she'll forgive you."

"I don't think she will." I said, shaking my head because I was quite aware that I was stupid and I didn't deserve Lana at all.

"You were drunk, you were lonely and I wasn't there to help stop it from happening just…can you talk to her next time she calls please?"

I swallowed and shook my head, really not sure that Lana and I were going to survive this. I wanted us to, and I was willing to fight for her, but she had told me to leave her alone so I was giving her, her space. What I wasn't ready for at all was for the feelings in my stomach about her space. What if in the space she realized that she wasn't ready to hunt…ever? What if she never wanted to be with me again?

That's when it hit me—I really _did_ love her. I was really worried about what this was doing to me and I knew that deep down I was broken in two. No other woman had ever made me feel like this and I wanted to be angry about that and try and rebuild my reputation, but I couldn't be. Lana was my girlfriend, and I loved her, and I had made a terrible mistake, and I needed her. Unfortunately, she wanted to be alone.

"What if she wants to stay alone?" I asked Sam, glancing at him.

Sam smiled at me. "She doesn't…just talk to her."

"Yeah…maybe." I replied, and I kept driving until we got to the motel, wishing Lana was there to make a joke…to pick our bed.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I _hated_ waking up without Dean next to me. Whenever I woke up in one of the motels, he was right next to me, holding me protectively. That or he was up and his side of the bed still faintly smelled like him and he was either getting coffee and showed right up, or he was chatting with Sam and had a smile to throw my way. Why had I sent him away from me? Just so that I could have time to grieve?

At first I had thought that I had done the right thing, but after a few days I really just missed him. The only thing I had of his left behind was a shirt, and it was losing his scent—damn t-shirt. I mean I knew his smell wasn't going to be left on it forever and I was making it worse by wearing it, but I needed to see him. I needed to see him, but he wasn't the first step of my journey back to him.

That was really the only thing that I was completely sure of, actually—that I needed to be back with Dean. I missed Sam too. He was my rock and I liked joking with him, and snuggling with him…I missed rustling his hair and even flirting with him. I knew I shouldn't miss flirting with him, but it was part of mine and Sam's relationship and in the end, I knew that Dean was my person.

"Anybody here?" I asked out loud as I walked into the Roadhouse, twisting the promise ring that Dean had given me. "It's me…Lana."

Ash came into the Roadhouse too from the side. "Hey, Lana—where is your boy entourage?"

"They're off on a hunt." I said with a laugh, unzipping my jacket. "Is Ellen here maybe?"

"Ellen is in the basement doing some inventory but she'll come up. Anything I can do you for?" Ash asked, winking at me.

Honestly I found it adorable, but I had a boyfriend and I wasn't about to jeopardize that with Ash. Besides, even though a little flirting couldn't do any harm, I was there to see Ellen for a reason and I really just wanted to get the talk out of the way. Still, he was being adorable, so I decided that until Ellen got there, I had nothing else to do, so why not at least be nice to him and let him down without bruising his ego?

"I would love it if you could help me with my problems, but what kind of girl would that make me, Ash?" I asked him, setting my hand on his shoulder. "Hey, Ellen."

Ellen smiled at me. "What brings you here, Lana?"

"I just kind of needed to talk to you, actually." I told her, smiling at Ash and then going over to Ellen and hugging her before sitting at the bar, her going around it and leaning on it as I did. "Do you have time to hear me rant a little?"

"I'm always here to help, Lana." Ellen assured me, resting her hand on mine as Ash and some other girl went towards the back room.

Jo came over and sat down next to me. "I don't mind helping you either."

"Thanks…both of you." I said sincerely, taking a breath and figuring out where to start.

xx

**Dean's POV**

"I don't know man, why don't we just chill out and think about this?" I asked Sam suddenly.

I knew that he had had one of his premonitions and that we needed to do this but at the same time…I wasn't so sure. I was kind of annoyed when Sam reached over and turned off my music too, and I kind of missed Lana. By now she'd have some kind of remark to make, and I wished that she was around to buffer the arguments too…weird because normally I hated when she took both sides.

"What is there to think about?" Sam asked me.

I shrugged at him. "Just don't know if going to the Roadhouse is the smartest idea."

"Dean, it's another premonition, I know it. This is _gonna_ happen, and Ash can tell us where. Plus it could have some connection to the demon. My visions always do." Sam protested.

"That's my point. There's going to be hunters there. I don't know if—if—if going in and announcing that you're some kind of supernatural freak with a demonic connection is the bet thing, okay?" I told him, really not wanting to get into this right now but knowing that I had to whether I wanted to or not.

Sam laughed a little. "So I'm a freak now?"

"You've always been a freak." I said, patting Sam on the knee.

Sam just rolled his eyes and laughed a little, me turning my music back on as we headed to the Roadhouse. We got out and walked in, Jo turning to us first and I knew that my breath caught in my throat when I recognized that backside—Lana. She turned around when Jo spoke up, and I swallowed. Why was she here? did I want to kiss her so badly? PDA was all right when I was really broken from Dad's death and the loss of the baby I had grown to actually want even though I also ignored that out loud and couldn't talk about…but not now.

"You just can't stay away, huh?" Jo asked us, a twinkle in her eye.

I chuckled at it. "Yeah, looks like. How you doing, Jo?"

"Where's Ash?" Sam asked suddenly, and I looked over at Lana as she stood up and came over to me, Ellen looking at us.

"In his back room," Jo informed him.

"Great." Sam said, taking off immediately, kissing Lana's cheek before heading back to go and get Ash's help.

"And I'm fine." Jo told him Sam's disappearing figure.

I smiled but, kept looking at Lana as she got closer and closer. "Sorry, he's—we're kind of on a bit of a timetable."

Lana smiled at me and took a hold of my jacket, looking up at me with those eyes of hers and I cursed myself for her effect on me. I was like putty in her hands and I hated myself for what I had done to her the other night…how could she forgive me for that? How could I forgive myself? God…I wanted to kiss Lana so bad when she cocked her head to one side like that…I was so screwed.

"I take it that PDA is frowned upon now that you're big and macho again?" Lana asked me, Jo retreating back to the bar counter.

I smiled at her. "You're wearing my shirt."

Lana just kept showing me over and over again that she was mine and that she wasn't going to stray and the second I was drunk and upset I almost slept with some random waitress, which to be fair was something I used to do all the time. Why was I being punished like this? I finally fall in love with a good woman, and she deserves so much more than me. She thought that she saw the good in me and that I was some big hero, but I was just some other jackass.

"Baby, I love you." She told me, leaning up.

I couldn't help myself, so I leaned down and kissed her, relaxing a little as her lips touched mine and I realized that I needed her. She was my girlfriend and she deserved better than me, but I needed and I wanted her. Why was I being so selfish? I had to tell her the truth…but then she'd be out of my life for good…and I couldn't live with her gone…I just couldn't.

"I should check on Sammy." I replied, pulling away and stroking her hair. "I've missed you."

She nodded and smiled sadly. "I missed you too…go talk to Ash."

xx

**Lana's POV**

I hadn't been expecting to see Dean and Sam, but seeing them made it that much harder for me. I wanted to know what was going on, but Ellen, Jo and I hadn't even had the talk I had hoped that we were going to have. There were things I needed to get off of my chest, but Sam was just so intent on finding Ash and I was so curious…so I hurried to the back room just as Dean called "Hey, Dr. Badass" through the door and Ash opened it, totally naked.

"Sam? Dean? Lana?" Ash asked, and then he sniffed the air. "Sam, Dean and Lana."

"Um, look Ash…we need your help." Sam told him, looking at him as the door covered what it needed to.

"Well Hell then, I guess I need my pants." He said, and then he closed the door on us as the three of us exchanged looks.

I slipped my hand into Dean's and smiled as he held it. "So…what do you guys need Ash for in particular?"

"We could just use his laptop." Sam replied with a shrug, Dean kissing my head and sidling closer to me.

I have to admit that I was loving this closeness since I had missed him so much, and even half wanted to drag him into Ash's back room and take him then and there but it wasn't the time. Besides, when Ash was dressed, he did some searches on his laptop, but there were no demonic signs or omens. Then Sam asked him to look for a house fire in 1983 that originated in a baby's nursery on the baby's six month birthday. Jo looked at us funny as Dean looked around nervously trying to figure out if anyone heard, and then I rested my hand on Sam's shoulder as he looked at Ash with anticipation and we all wished someone would talk so the silence would end.

"Okay now that is just weird, Man. Why the Hell would I be looking for that?" Ash asked.

Sam placed a beer on the table. "Because there's a PBR in it for ya."

"Give me fifteen minutes." Ash said quickly.

While Ash was doing that for Sam, Dean sat at the bar and I went to sit next to him while he looked at his beer. He smiled when I rested my hands on his and set his beer down as Jo turned on the Jukebox. "Can't Fight this Feeling" came on, and Dean looked up at her and then he drank his beer and then gave Jo a look.

"What?" She asked as she set some empty beer mugs down.

Dean made a face. "R.E.O. Speedwagon?"

"Damn right, R.E.O. Kevin Cronin sings it from the heart." Jo replied, coming over to him.

"He sings it from the hair." Dean and I replied.

"There's a difference." Dean told her, sipping his beer, winking at me cause we had had the same idea there.

"So…" Jo began, looking over to make sure her mother wasn't listening. "That profile you got Ash looking for…your mother died that way too, didn't she? A fire in Sam's nursery?"

Dean shifted uncomfortably. "Look Jo, it's kind of a family thing."

"I could help." Jo said.

"I'm sure you could." Dean told her as I looked at the two of them. "But we gotta handle this one ourselves."

Jo nodded and I noted a look in her eyes as Dean turned to look at me and realized I should probably look back at my boyfriend. So I smiled and looked at him, leaning in close and resting my hands on his leg. Mainly I wanted to be close to him, but at the same time I knew part of me was marking my territory even though from Dean's end he wasn't attracted in the slightest…he had me and I seemed to be enough for him.

"So did Sammy…you know?" I asked him, referring to his visions and nodding when Dean nodded, our noses grazing. "Okay…do you need help with it?"

Dean raised his eyebrows. "I thought that you thought hunting was our crutch."

"Yeah, but I've missed you too much." I admitted and he grinned.

I was beyond ecstatic when he smiled at that, kissing me swiftly, making me want more but knowing that was the PDA limit for him. He was just marking his territory and I had marked mine, and I was glad that he'd missed me so much. One hunt couldn't hurt, could it? I mean I needed to talk to Ellen, but that could wait…what if they needed me? Or was I just making things make sense in my head because I missed him so damn much?

"I would be _very _happy if you came with us…but I don't want you to feel like you're not moving on by hunting—you kinda made that clear before." Dean explained, stroking my hair a little.

I nodded slowly and was about to speak up when Sam said they had a lead and Dean stood up to go. Jo's gaze followed Dean's every movement and I reached out for his hand, smiling at him and nodding. For some reason Jo's little eye movements were making me feel a little protective of what was mine, so I had made up my mind—I was going with them. So I told Ellen I would talk to her later and got into the Impala with them, immediately talking to Sam.

"So what do you have?" I asked him.

Sam smiled a little and then told Dean and I about Andrew Gallagher, who was born in '83 like Sam. I was a year younger than Sam was—well more like several months—and I never really knew that before. Anyway, he explained that we needed to find him and I nodded and ended up napping a little in the backseat, just glad to be in their company again, feeling a little less 'disturbed' than normal.

When I woke up, we were where Andy had last worked, and the boys were going to go in, but I wanted to sit in the car. I asked them to bring me back some coffee, and Sam nodded, Dean smiling at me and then heading off with his brother. Besides, it gave me some time to fill Jen in on where I was, so I pulled my phone out and gave her a call.

"Hey, Lan." Jen told me when she answered. "I take it you got to the Roadhouse all right?"

I laughed a little. "Yeah, and I got hit on by Dr. Badass and hit on him back and then…Sam and Dean showed up and I came on their hunt with them—please Jen, don't hurt me."

"I can't very well hurt you from here!" Jen exclaimed and then she laughed. "I knew you couldn't stay away from him for long. Have you…did you at least open up to Ellen like you opened up to me? She'd understand better from a mother point of view, I think…I have no experiencing giving that kind of love yet and she's unbiased."

"No, I uh…I was going to talk to her about it but Sam and Dean showed up and I…I felt like Jo was encroaching so I'm staking my claim." I admitted and then sighed. "Is that completely juvenile of me?"

Jen laughed again. "I don't think so—he gave you a promise ring, didn't he?"

"Okay, okay—it's juvenile. I mean I know he's not into her because I seem to always have his attention these days, but still I mean…I practically kicked him out." I explained and then smiled as the silence I knew too well set in. "You have to go, huh?"

"Yeah, you always could tell. I'll call you back." Jen told me. "I love you, Lan. Bye."

I smiled. "Bye, Jen. Keep me posted on everything, okay? I love you too."

We both said our 'goodbye' and I hung up the phone, starting to get out of the car when Dean and Sam got back in. I smiled at them brightly when Sam handed me a latte and Dean turned to look at me before he stuck the key in the ignition. They had both missed me and I had missed them, and I felt pretty picked up…even though I still wanted to talk to Ellen about everything going on with me.

"He's in a van on orchard street with the picture of a barbarian queen on the side riding a polar bear." Dean explained to me.

I laughed loudly. "Sounds like the man has some style…you find out anything else?"

"Nothing much except that everyone just leaves him alone." Sam explained with a shrug.

I nodded slowly. "Weird."

I smiled a little though and sipped my latte, the three of us silent the rest of the way and then we parked and watched Andy's van. It was actually a pretty cool van, but it made me chortle with laughter because it was seriously out there. Dean was pretty impressed by it too, and I wanted to bond with him over it, but I also wanted to talk about things with him I didn't think I could talk to him about.

"I'm sorry—I'm starting to like this dude. That van is sweet." Dean told us.

I smiled a little and opened up the back door. "I'll be right back."

The boys nodded and I got out of the car and went to a store on the street and sighed. I went to use their bathroom, just looking in the mirror and then sipping my latte. I wasn't sure what to do—I just needed to clear my head. I wasn't feeling as messed up as I had before, and I had my space and I loved being with the boys again but…there were still some things I needed to talk out…I just didn't want to be pushy. Maybe I was over-thinking all of it.

"Come on, Lan…stop this." I told me reflection, and then I headed back out as Sam got out of the car.

Sam smiled at me and stopped me. "We're going to tail the older man from my vision, and Dean's going to tail Andy."

"All right—good luck, Baby." I told Dean, giving him a 'goodbye' kiss.

He smiled at me and told me and Sam to be careful before he drove off and I nodded and followed Sam with my latte. We were silent for a while, and then I took his hand and he looked at me and then smiled a little. It was now or never because honestly Sam would understand, but at the same time it was hard for him as well.

"Has Dean mentioned the baby at all, Sammy?" I asked Sam slowly.

Sam leaned his body closer to mine. "Lan, he's devastated. He was used to the idea of a baby and even though he never really talked about it, he really wanted it. He just doesn't want to talk about it with you because he knows how much the subject hurts you."

"He just has enough to deal with, you know?" I told Sam, shrugging a little. "I just don't want to burden him anymore."

"Lan, you can't get over this if you don't talk to _him_ about it. Talking to me and to Jen—it's just not the same." Sam said.

Right then we saw the elderly black man from Sam's vision answer his phone and Sam saw the bus go by. He looked at me and then dropped my hand, letting me know it wasn't me, and then hurried over to the gun shop and pulled the alarm. The man decided not to go into the gun shop, and got another cell phone call and then we saw Andy driving Dean's car.

"Andy's got the Impala." I told Sam.

Sam was on it, and called Dean, and looked miffed. "He let him take it."

"He what? He loves that thing." I replied.

Sam nodded and then we turned to see the man walk out into the street and get hit by a bus. I took Sam's hand as pain crossed his face, and then I waited with him until Dean got to us, and I ran my hand through Sam's hair as he talked about how he thought keeping him out of the gun shop would have saved him. He was feeling pretty responsible for it, but it wasn't his fault…I just didn't know how to make him see that.

"There was nothing you could do about it." I told him softly.

He just nodded, and then I looked past him as Dean looked at me and we made eye contact. I don't know what our exchanged looks were, but we all got up and then we went walking down the street, seeing the Impala as we came to a corner. Dean's whole face lit up at the sight of his precious car, and I smiled a little because it warmed my heart.

"Thank God!" Dean exclaimed, rather excited his baby was okay.

We crossed the street and I smiled at him. "Not a scratch."

"I'm sorry, Baby—I'll never leave you again." Dean said, touching the car and looking her over. "At least he left the keys in it."

"Yeah, real Samaritan this guy." Sam told us sarcastically.

Then he and Dean argued about whether or not Andy was guilty of the man walking in front of the bus or not, and then we went to track him down. We found his car, and broke into it, all of us kind of amazed at what was in it and how awesome it looked inside. There was a tiger painting, a disco ball, and lots of other things and I couldn't help but giggle a little because the guy was definitely eccentric and that was kind of cool.

"Oh, come on." Dean told Sam. "This is—this is magnificent. That's what this is. Not exactly a serial killer's lair though."

Sam looked at him and gave him a look. "Seriously, Man?"

"The red _is_ nice." I admitted softly.

"There's no clown paintings on the walls, or scissors stuck in victim's photos. I like the tiger." Dean said, rubbing his chin with his fingers.

"Hegel? Kant?" Sam asked, looking through the books in the van as I stepped away from them. "This is some pretty heavy reading, Man."

I giggled a little. "Don't forget the bong."

"Yeah. Moby Dick's Bong." Dean told Sam, smiling and picking it up.

xx

When we were done, Sam researched some and I sat in the back seat typing up an e-mail to Jen, and then texting her—strange, but we did it often. Then as Dean pulled a minimart sandwich out to eat it in the driver's seat, his phone rang. How it got into the backseat and out of his jeans pocket I had no idea, but I picked it up and frowned: who the Hell was Tiffany?

"Blech." Dean said, tossing back a wrapper that hit the side of the seat next to me. "You know, someday I'd like to just sit down and eat something I didn't have to microwave at a minimart."

Dean chewed vigorously as I sighed and put the wrapper in a bag and ate my Quaker Granola bar, ignoring the call and handing Dean his phone when he turned around. I sighed as Sam and Dean argued whether Andy was the culprit or not, and then Andy showed up at our car door. It was a little disconcerting, but at the same time I was willing to let it slide because Andy was mighty gorgeous.

"Why are you following me?" Andy asked as Dean looked nervous.

"Well see, we're lawyers and a relative of yours passed away—" Sam began.

"Tell the truth." Andy interrupted forcefully.

Sam decided to start again. "Like I said—"

"—we hunt demons." Dean blurted, and Sam and I looked at him.

"Dean." Sam said in a worried voice as I sighed.

"Demons?" Andy asked skeptically.

I swallowed a little. "Dean."

"Demons and spirits. Things your worst nightmare wouldn't even touch. Lana here is my girlfriend, and Sam here's my brother." Dean continued.

"Dean, shut-up!" Sam said, squirming now as Dean wouldn't shut up.

"I'm trying." Dean shot at Sam. "He's psychic—kinda like you. Well not really like you…" He said as Sam smiled awkwardly at Andy. "But see he thinks you're a murderer and he's afraid he might become one himself because you're all part of something that's terrible and I hope to Hell he's wrong, but I'm starting to get a little scared that he's right." Dean said, smiling awkwardly now. "And all Lana can do is flirt with him in plain eyesight when it kills me and she's all witchy so I guess she's not affected by you."

Andy nodded and got all commanding. "Okay, you know what? Just leave me alone."

"Okay." Dean said, and then he stopped smiling and cowered as Sam and I wheeled on him.

Sam got out of the car to talk to Andy and show him that his mind powers didn't work on him, and Sam motioned for Dean to stay put as he and I got out of the car. Sam asked why he killed the doctor as he began to have a painful vision, and I went over to him while Andy swore that he didn't kill the doctor. Sam started to fall over, so Dean and I helped him up—I was worried about Sam and his visions.

Sam started to talk about how a woman was going to kill herself, and Andy was confused as to how Sam knew she was _going_ to. I smiled at Andy and then Sam and I sent Dean off to check as we kept an eye on Andy and I kept an eye on Dean after a fire truck went past us. I could ask Dean about the phone call later when all of this cooled down and we finished this hunt.

"You need something?" I asked, looking Sam in the eye and resting my hand on his cheek.

Sam smiled a little and shook his head. "Nah, I'm good. Thanks though, Lan."

"So…you two in love or something?" Andy asked us.

I turned to him but Sam answered him first. "No…she's just my family—Dean's the one that's in love with her."

"I got that." Andy said with a nod, "it's why I asked. He's incredibly jealous but I think it's stemming from guilt."

Probably over Tiffany…

"You know, Andy…you really don't strike me as a murderer." I told him, stepping over to him and holding out my hand. "I'm Lana."

Andy smiled at me. "Andy."

I smiled at him and he and I started to talk a little until Dean called us to say the woman was dead, and Sam came to the conclusion that Dean was right—Andy was innocent. Andy and Sam began to talk and I leaned against the fence, and then Dean came back. He explained that he had talked to Ash and Ash had found out that Holly Beckett, the victim, had given birth when she was 18 back in 1983 on the same day that Andy was born. Andy said he could get us into the County Records to get the birth records, and used his power of coercion.

"These aren't the droids you're looking for." Andy mocked as the old man left.

"Awesome." Dean replied as I giggled and winked at Andy.

Sam searched through the files. "Andy, its true: Holly Beckett was your birth mother."

"Has anyone got a Vicodin?" Andy asked as I took the papers from Sam.

"Apparently Dr. Jennings was her doctor too. He oversaw the adoption. It all links you." I explained as I looked the papers over too. "But it gets better…you have a twin brother."

"I have an evil twin." Andy said, trying to take it all in.

I smiled a little at him. "I have Dean getting his picture faxed from the DMV now."

"What's my brother's name?" Andy asked.

Sam looked over at him. "Ansem Weems. He's got a local address."

"He lives _here_?" Andy asked.

When Dean handed us the picture, Andy was freaked—it was the same guy that worked with him when he had started his job a year ago. As we talked about it more in the car, Sam began to groan and I unbuckled my seatbelt and scooted closer to the front seats as Andy gave me a little more room, and I placed my hands on Sam's shoulders.

"Sammy, honey? Are you okay?" I asked him, rubbing his shoulders a bit to try and keep him nice and calm.

"Sam?" Dean asked and then he stopped the car and we got out to as Sam had another painful vision. "Hey! Hey!"

Sam swallowed and looked at us. "He's going after Tracy."

As Dean got into the trunk, Sam told Dean to stay with the car and Dean didn't object—he didn't want anyone messing with his mind anymore. When we got to the car that Ansem and Tracy were in, Sam threatened Ansem with a gun and then we realized he could do his mind control without words—he could use his mind. Andy had to use his power on Tracy to get her to stop when she hit Sam with a large stick and Sam fell to the ground and I turned to Ansem.

"You really think you're something else, don't you?" I asked him.

Ansem smiled at me. "You can join Tracy in a flying act."

"Your mind powers don't work on me." I told him, going to Sam to check him over.

"Why not?" Ansem asked, not amused with me anymore.

Andy came close to me as if he was protecting me. "She's special."

"Like us?" Ansem asked, a little more amused now.

Andy shook his head. "More special than us."

As Sam began to get up as Ansem talked about the demon and about how he was just killing the people that were between them, I had the feeling something bad was going to happen with Dean and I looked up as Ansem said, "I see you."

"What are you going to do?" I asked suddenly.

"Your boyfriend is about to blow his own head off with the sniper he has pointed at me." Ansem replied to me. "Bye-Bye."

Then Andy shot his brother and Tracy gulped as Sam stood up and I ran to where Dean had been and looked him over. It had scared me half to death when Ansem was going to have Dean shoot himself, and I really couldn't handle losing him. I knew then more than ever that there was no way I could live my life without Dean Winchester…I had to be there for him no matter what happened between us, so that meant no more running away and making excuses that it was for the best.

"You okay?" I asked him.

"I'm fine." He replied, smiling at me.

I looked at him and smiled back. "You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure." Dean assured me, stroking my hair and then chuckling when I kissed him.

"I'm glad." I told him, showering his face with kisses. "I am so, _so_ glad."

He smiled a little. "That means a lot."

I nodded and then we went to make sure everyone was all right since it was getting light out and the cops arrived, and Andy was getting better at his mind control. He came over to Sam, Dean and I and sighed. He was distraught and I couldn't blame him—he had loved Tracy very much and now she wasn't even giving him the time of day after he had accidentally used the mind control on her.

"She won't even look at me." Andy told us dismally.

"Yeah, she's pretty shaken up." Sam replied with a nod.

Andy shook his head because he knew that she was scared of him now. Sam told him that we had to leave, but left him his cell number so we could keep in touch. I even threw in a flirtatious joke and though Andy appreciated it and Sam thought it was funny, Dean's smile really wasn't one of any amusement whatsoever.

"What am I supposed to do now?" Andy asked as we walked away.

Dean cleared his throat. "You be good, Andy…or we'll be back."

Sam stopped us and began to talk about how he thought the demon was pushing us into things and I looked at him as Dean told him we didn't know what the demon wanted. This was starting to get a little more complicated, and it was pretty obvious that everything we _thought_ we had known had gone right out the window. Now there was more for us to have to look into and I wasn't sure where all of that information was going to take us. How were Sam, Dean and I going to get through this? They needed me now more than ever and it was about time that I sucked up my problems and tried to help Sam through his visions and his fear of the demons plans for him.

"Even so, you're right—everyone is capable of murder under the right circumstances. We have to keep our guard up." I told him dismally. "I mean we shouldn't worry about it until we get to it, but…it's definitely something to be aware of."

Sam nodded and then looked at Dean. "You know I heard you Dean—when Andy made you tell the truth. You are just as scared of this as I am."

"That was mind control!" Dean protested to us. "That—that—it's like being roofied man. It doesn't count." He said, pointing to Sam over the car. "No, no. I—I'm calling do-over."

"What are you, like 7?" Sam asked as I laughed.

"It doesn't matter. Look, we just gotta keep doing what we're doing. We gotta hunt the demon down and kill the son of a bitch." Dean said, and then his cell phone rang.

Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah, I guess."

Sam and I got into the car as Dean answered the phone and told Ellen we'd be right there. When we got to the Roadhouse, Ellen wanted to know if we wanted to tell her about the last case we had. I wanted to open myself up to her, but at the same time I knew that Dean was kind of wary of letting anyone else in and Ellen was good at reading me…

"Nope. Not really." Dean said, but she gave him a look as he sipped his beer. "No offense, but its kind of a family thing."

"Not anymore." Ellen said, showing us papers and hovering over us. "I got these from Ash. That Gallagher boy's house burned down on his 6-month birthday just like yours. You think it was the demon both times don't you?"

Sam nodded slowly. "We think so."

"Sam." Dean and I said.

"Why?" Ellen asked us.

"None of your business." Dean told her angrily.

"You mind your tongue with me, boy. This isn't just your war—this is war. Something big and bad is coming and its coming fast, and their side holds all the cards. Now at best, all we got is us. Together. No secrets or half-truths here." Ellen explained and Dean looked at her angrily as I sipped my beer.

I cleared my throat. "My mother is a witch—my birth mother. I'm not talking like, sell your soul to demons kind of witch either, I'm talking the real deal. My birth father is a whole different story, but the fact of the matter is that my mother thought that my little sister, Annie, and I were in danger and gave me to Bethany and Marcus, who raised me up until my 18th birthday, when they were burned alive. I'm immune to most things and the demon knows that I can't sense him like I could if I practiced, but I'm afraid of my powers…afraid of how many people with powers go dark side. He uses that to his advantage because I have no way of identifying him. If I was more versed in my powers than I would, but my mother's powers helped to destroy her—the fire was the demon's way of showing me that he was in control. I guess that's a need to know on me, and if that freaks you out too much and you want me to leave…I understand that."

"There are people out there, like Andy Gallagher, like me, and, um, we all have this special ability." Sam said as Ellen looked at me and took it all in.

"Ability?" Ellen asked.

Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah. A psychic ability. Me, I, have um, visions, premonitions. It's different for everyone."

Dean looked annoyed Sam and I had said anything, and he and Ellen looked at each other angrily. Part of Ellen's anger with Dean was definitely because she knew that Dean and I were in a little bit of a standstill, but he was also being rude right now, even though I knew that he was trying to protect his brother from hunters like Gordon who would see Sam and I as something to hunt. If Sam wanted to come clean with her about it and trust her though…I was completely and utterly on board with that because I for one trusted Ellen with my life already.

"The demon said he had plans for people like us." Sam continued.

Ellen looked confused. "What kind of plans?"

"We don't really know." Sam replied.

"These people…these psychics? Are they dangerous?" Ellen asked us.

"No." Dean said. "Not all of them."

Sam nodded slowly. "But some of them are—very dangerous."

"How many are we looking at?" Ellen asked.

"We've been able to track a clear pattern so far. Their houses have caught on fire on the kid's 6-month birthday." Dean said.

"That's not true." Sam and I replied.

I took a deep breath. "Ansem Weems…Sam and I looked at his files and there were no house fires."

"Nothing out of the ordinary." Sam added.

"Which breaks pattern, and if there are anymore out there like him, there would be nothing in the systems. No way to track them all down." Ellen replied as Jo came up from grabbing a case of beer her mother had made her go get.

"And so who knows how many of them are really out there?" Dean asked.

Ellen nodded and turned to Jo. "Jo, honey?"

"Yeah?" Jo replied.

"You better break out the whiskey instead." Ellen said, wiping a counter down.

Dean and Sam both took a breath and then they went to go and talk to Ash, Ellen looking at me as I chewed on my lip and stared at my mug of beer dismally. She reached out and rested her hand on mine and I looked up at her and I smiled sadly. Everything about her was just so motherly and it was hard not to just open up my mouth and spill everything to her because I felt like she would understand my pain…even if not first hand.

"He's never going to want to settle down." I told her suddenly, not stopping myself. "Someday, when the demon was dead and gone I wanted to settle down, get married and have some kids, but…I can't have any. I'm not just upset about the miscarriage, Ellen…I'm upset because after the accident I went into surgery and I lost the baby and I lost enough of my uterus to make it so that I can't carry a baby." I told her, tears coming out of my eyes as Jo sat down next to me. "I mean at first I was kind of terrified that I was having a baby, but then I was in love with the idea of becoming a mother and now I just…I'm trying. Sam and Dean need me and I need them so I can't hide from hunting anymore and talking about it all makes me feel like it isn't really my crutch anymore."

Ellen squeezed my hand reassuringly. "Lana you're going to be okay eventually, you just have to give it some time…and you need to talk to your boyfriend."

I nodded slowly and wiped the tears away, a little more worried about who the Hell Tiffany was…

**Note: I have changed this quite a lot and I'm still figuring out which story line to go with, so…I might ask you guys for ideas later. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	6. The Past Catches Up With You

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

I smiled a little, biting my finger as Dean looked at me and opened his eyes slowly. He chuckled and closed his eyes again, still a little too asleep to worry about the fact that I was watching him. On the one hand I really just wanted to spend time with him, but on the other hand, I wanted to know who Tiffany was—she'd called the day before and I was pretty sure that Dean had cheated on me.

On the one hand I couldn't blame him because I had practically kicked him out of my house telling him that I needed space, but on the other hand I had thought that I had actually meant something to him. Still, I had no proof yet and Sam wasn't spilling his guts to me, so there was nothing for me to do but wait. I mean I had a plan set in motion, but if she called again I was just going to get upset about it and demand some answers. What if he had another girlfriend? What if he was going to dump me soon?

"Are you awake?" I asked him softly.

Dean smiled. "Do I look awake to you?"

"I think _someone_ should wake up now." I mused, climbing on top of him and sitting on his torso.

"Yeah? I'm not so sure about that." Dean replied, opening his eyes and smiling at me. "You know I kind of really missed the man boxers."

I smiled and leaned down to kiss him, moving against him a little and then sighing when his phone went off. Dean shook his head as I pulled away, trying to bring me back in for a kiss, but I picked his phone up and looked at the cover. When I sat up and gave him a look he sighed a little and I showed him his phone.

"Maybe Tiffany can get you up." I said and dropped the phone on his chest growling a little when he grabbed my arms so I couldn't leave. "Dean, let go!"

Dean shook his head. "No, Lanni—you and I need to talk about this."

"I needed space to deal with the fact that I can't _ever_ give you children and you went out and banged some chick named Tiffany! Dean, how could you? I've been hurting and I've been keeping it to myself because you have things to work through and yet I never jumped into bed with someone else!" I yelled at himo.

"Lanni, I know I can't make it better, but can you please just hear me out?" Dean asked me, sitting up, our faces now close together.

I hated it when he breathed on me because I actually liked it…I liked it a lot and he knew that I liked it. Still, I was pissed at him, so when he glanced at my lips and actually seemed a little lustful, it upset me even more. He and I weren't even separated a week and he was in bed with someone else…what did that say about our relationship? What did that say about how he _truly_ felt about me?

"Fine…just let me go." I told him, my eyes boring into his.

"I didn't sleep with her."

"…you didn't?"

Dean let go of my hands and sighed as he shook his head. "I just almost did—we got handsy, but it I didn't sleep with her. I'm really sorry about what I did. Does it occur to you that maybe I'm completely ashamed of myself for it?"

"You know what, Dean? I can see you feeling bad about it…but that doesn't change how much this is hurting me. How long did you wait? A day? An hour?" I asked him angrily, getting off of him. "I am completely in love with you, and you knew that! I've always been there for you! Yeah, I told you I needed some space and I couldn't do that hunt but that's because I was in so much pain I had to deal with that in order to be there for you like I used to be!"

"Does it occur to you that pushing me away hurt me even more?" Dean asked me.

My mouth gaped open. "Are you…_defending_ what you did?"

"No! No, of course I'm not!" Dean protested.

"Well it sounds like you are!" I yelled biting my lip as Dean got off of the bed too.

He came over towards me but stopped and sighed when I held my hands up to stop him and shook my head. I was hurt—I was hurting everywhere—and I really wished that I could wrap my head around him trying to apologize, but I couldn't. On top of that, Tiffany tried calling again and she was just making the whole thing between us so much worse than it could have been.

"I seriously need to change my number." Dean said angrily, snatching up his phone and silencing it.

I shook my head. "Ellen was wrong."

"You talked to Ellen about this?" Dean asked me.

"I thought I was different, Dean! I mean I thought that I had actually found out who you really were, and now this! Do you even really love me?" I asked him, the tears coming back. "I mean you talk to Sam more than you talk to me anymore and the moment we hit a rough patch, you ran out to some random chick!"

Dean growled and at first I was surprised, but it was kind of more surprising that instead of being upset he was growling, I was upset he wasn't talking. He just ran his fingers through his hair, and then he stepped closer to me and I shot him a warning glance. There was no way in the world that he was going to get through this argument trying to reach out and touch me—he was in _so_ much trouble with me.

"How _dare_ you ask me if I love you?" Dean asked me angrily.

I scoffed. "How _dare_ I? I'm pretty sure people who are in love don't go around almost sleeping with other people when the going gets rough!"

"I am _sorry_ that I did that, Lanni! I was drunk, I was lonely, and I was stupid!" Dean tried, pleading with me now. "Don't you think I've been kicking myself over it? I would do _anything_ to take back hurting you!"

"Well you _can't_ take it back, Dean! All you can do is try to make it all better!" I exclaimed.

Dean ran his fingers through his hair. "Talk to me about the baby."

I opened my mouth to say something else, but honestly I didn't want to talk about the baby right then—I wanted to know about this girl he'd almost cheated on me with. On the other hand I _did_ want to talk to Dean about the baby and he knew that was part of why I was mad. I opened my mouth again to start having a conversation with him but his phone went off again…so I went out of the bedroom door and headed to the main area of the hotel room.

xx

**Sam's POV**

I swallowed when Lana came out of the bedroom and wiped her eyes, heading straight for the refrigerator. Normally I wouldn't try to get in the middle of it all, but Lana and Dean meant a lot to me, and so I headed into the bedroom and shut the door behind me. Dean was sitting on his bed and looked up at me, sighing loudly and shaking his head.

"Dean, you have to talk about this with her, whether she walks away or not—be persistent." I protested.

Dean gave me a look. "Sam, this isn't any of your business."

"Actually, it kind of is—the two of you are more than just my family—you're my company, Dean. I hunt with you two I travel with you two, and you guys arguing all the time is kind of disrupting everything. So if you won't talk to her about it right now, I think you should at least talk to _someone_ about it." I explained to him.

"I just…I messed up, Sammy." Dean told me.

I nodded and sat down on the bed next to him, waiting for him to say what it was he was going to say. He needed to come clean about things and since he and Lana were obviously not speaking to each other, it was time for me to step in. The two were stubborn, and they were hurt, and they just needed to come clean with each other.

"Why can't you just tell her that you want a family with her?" I asked slowly as Dean just shook his head at me.

He looked at his hands. "Because that's going to hurt her, Sammy. Do you even understand how badly she wants to have a family with me? I think I keep proving over and over again that I don't deserve her in the first place—she's not going to just forgive me given the order of events."

"The two of you are so damn stubborn!" I cried suddenly. "What is wrong with you? Relationships include having conversations you don't want to have! Please just…just _talk_ to each other!"

Dean took a breath and just sat there, making me sigh and leave the room, Lana looking at me from the couch. I sat down next to her and she looked directly at me, both of us making eye contact and I knew what was coming next.

"Thanks for trying, Sammy, but Dean and I just need to be upset with each other right now—especially me." Lana told me. "I know you have good reason to want us to talk to each other, but he almost cheated on me like the moment I told him to give me time and I need to come to terms with that before talking to him about other things."

"I know that he shouldn't have done what he did but you pushed him away and it broke him. Try to take some responsibility for what you two have gotten yourselves into and grow up." I said, reaching out and stroking her hair. "It hurts, but it's just going to keep hurting until you talk to each other—that's my two cents."

Lana nodded at me and when it was obvious to me that their fight was over for the day, I gave up for a little while. The two spent the rest of the day just kind of glancing at each other and then we all decided to head to the Roadhouse. It seemed like one of those days, and I was just willing to do anything to get the two to talk to each other again.

"Los Angeles, California." Dean said, shutting the trunk of the car when we got there.

I laughed a little. "What's in L.A.?"

"A young girl's been kidnapped by an evil cult." Dean replied as Lana tried to look uninterested in the conversation, but it was obvious that she was.

"Yeah? The girl got a name?" I asked him.

"Katie Holmes." Dean said, looking up as he fumbled with his keys.

Lana and I both laughed. "That's funny."

"And, for you, so bitchy." I added with a smile.

Lana actually looked like she was going to say something to him and hers and Dean's eyes met, but then we heard yelling coming from the Roadhouse. At first I was pretty upset because Lana and Dean were finally going to talk some things out and I needed their tension relieved, but then I decided we should check it out. Lana was the first taking off to go inside, and I sighed loudly.

"I'm going!" Jo cried from inside the saloon.

"Over my dead body!" Ellen yelled back.

"You're flipping out over nothing!" Jo replied.

Dean smirked. "Of course, on the other hand, cat fight."

"We probably shouldn't intrude." I told them, but I followed them anyway.

"I am your mother, I don't have to be reasonable!" Ellen told her daughter.

Jo looked utterly upset. "You can't keep me here!"

"Oh don't you bet on that sweetie!" Ellen replied with a small laugh.

"What are you gonna do? You gonna chain me up in the basement?" Jo asked as we came in.

"You know what, you've had worse ideas than that recently!" Ellen said angrily, violently moving chairs. "You don't want to stay you don't have to. Why—why don't you go back to school?"

Jo made a derisive noise in her throat. "I didn't belong there! I was a freak with a knife collection!"

"Yeah but getting yourself killed on some dusty back road—_that's_ where you belong?" Ellen asked angrily.

Jo stopped and looked behind her mother, who turned to look at us. Lana smiled awkwardly and Ellen shot us a look that was making me feel uncomfortable. Dean looked like was enjoying the argument and Lana seemed to think we'd imposed and was second-thinking barging in like this. Actually…I was kind of second-thinking barging in as well and when Ellen spoke, I knew we should head out.

"Guys, bad time." Ellen told us.

I nodded in her direction. "Yes, Ma'am."

"We rarely drink before 10:00 anyways." Dean said, starting to turn to leave.

"We'll let you guys be. Sorry for _intruding_." Lana stressed to Dean and I, but more to Dean than to me—she was definitely still working through her anger.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I was trying to do what Sam wanted, but I still needed a bit of space and Ellen and Jo fighting was striking a nerve. Dean and I had to argue things out, but right now we were intruding on someone else's time to work through issues and we shouldn't have been. So it was time for us to give Ellen and Jo space and for Dean and me to fix things…if not for our sake, than for Sam's.

"Wait! I want to know what _they_ think about this." Jo said, walking over to us as we began to head out of the saloon.

"I don't care what they think!" Ellen told her as a family walked in.

The man spoke up. "Are you guys open?"

"Yes!" Ellen shouted as Jo shouted, "No!"

The man chuckled nervously and then he turned to his wife a little and then back to all of us. He was obviously aware that he had entered at a bad time and he was feeling about as awkward as the boys and I were feeling. So he just nodded a little and smiled awkwardly, all of us knowing what was going to happen before it did.

"We'll just check out the Arby's down the road." He informed us, his wife and kids leaving with him.

Before anyone could continue anything, the phone rang and we all just stood our ground. At first Jo and Ellen just looked at it, but then Ellen gave in and went to answer it. Jo was pretty certain she had found her 'in' and smiled, me stepping closer to Dean and getting ready to handle this because Dean really didn't need to.

"Harvelle's. Yeah, Preacher," Ellen said as Jo whirled on us and started talking to me since I'd taken Dean's spot.

"Three weeks ago, a young girl disappears from a Philadelphia apartment." She said, handing the file to me, not letting the shift of focus bother her, Dean's eyes on me the whole time. "Take it. It won't bite."

"Your mother isn't going to be so happy about it, but…" I took a deep breath and then took the file from her, opening it up.

Jo nodded at me. "And this girl wasn't the first. In the past 80 years 6 women have vanished. All from the same apartment, all young blondes. It only happens every decade or two so the cops never eyeball the pattern. So either we'll dealing with a very old serial killer—"

"Who put this together? Ash?" Dean asked her, looking at it over my shoulder.

"I did it myself." Jo replied.

I smiled at her. "It's very well put together, Jo. I'm willing to convince the boys to do it if you want."

"I got to admit, we hit the road for a lot less." Sam admitted with a nod.

"Good. If you like the case so much, _you_ take it." Ellen said, having got off of the phone.

Jo whirled on her mother. "Mom!"

"Joanna Beth this family has lost enough." Ellen told her, and I put my hand up to my mouth and I rested my face on it and thought about it. "I won't lose you too. I just won't."

I smiled at them and then rested my hand on Jo's shoulder, her sighing and then watching as the boys and I left. We already had our duffles packed so we got right onto the road and I swallowed, leaning forward a little. Dean noticed the movement and shifted a little, his eyes hitting the rearview mirror and he nodded slowly when I placed my hand on his shoulder and Sam smiled.

The three of us stayed pretty silent though, up until we were finally in Philadelphia and we stopped to get some gas. Dean glanced at me as he got the pump, and I got out of the car and leaned on it, looking at him. He smiled a little and stuck the nozzle into the car, stepping up closer to me, and I let him.

"I'm not breaking up with you." I told him softly.

He smiled a little. "I don't deserve that…but I'm really glad you're not."

"When we get to the apartment complex…I'd really like to talk things out with you." I explained to him.

"I think that's a good idea." He replied, leaning in a little and then stopping. "May I?"

I smiled softly and then kissed him, letting him deepen it just a little, but then I pulled away and got back into the car. He finished up getting the gas and then we made it to the apartment complex, all of us sneaking our way upstairs. We just wanted to get in, get the job done, and then get out and move on.

"I feel kinda bad snaking Jo's case." Sam said as we got into the apartment.

"Well, maybe she put together a good file, but can you see her out here working one of these things?" Dean asked. "I don't think so. You getting anything?"

Sam shook his head. "No, not yet."

"Guys…here. Shit!" I said when I got to the door, reaching out and touching the gooey black substance, looking at it on my finger. "This is ectoplasm. I haven't dealt with a spirit _this_ pissed off since the one that Jen and I found when we were 18."

"Oh God, guys—it's the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man." Dean said in a faked scared voice.

Sam looked at him and wished he'd be serious. "Dean, I've only seen this stuff like twice."

"All right, let's find this badass before it snags anymore girls." Dean replied.

I nodded at him, sighing because I wanted to talk to him, but we had a case to do and the fact that we had found ectoplasm was definitely incentive to move our asses. So we headed out of the apartment to go and do some more research, but then we heard talking and hid. We definitely didn't want to get caught, and this was a little too close for comfort to be completely honest.

"Yeah, it's a great building. I fixed it up nice. All the apartments come furnished too." A man explained.

"It's so spacious. You know my friend told me that I absolutely had to come and check it out, and she was so right. You did a really good job with this place." Jo told the landlord.

We came out of hiding in the hallway and Sam said, "What are you doing here?"

"There you are, Honey." Jo said coming over to him and putting her arm around him as I raised an eyebrow. "This is my boyfriend, Sam and his brother Dean and his girlfriend, Lana."

"Nice to meet you." The landlord told him. "Quite a gal you got here."

I smiled at him. "Who wouldn't love her?"

"So did you already check out the apartment?" Jo asked Sam. "The one for rent." She added as there was silence, and she laughed a little.

Sam immediately went with the flow. "Yeah, I loved it."

"How'd you get in?" The Landlord asked, raising his eyebrows.

"It was open." Dean replied.

Jo cut right into the conversation. "Now, Ed, when did the last tenant move out?"

"Oh, about a month ago. Cut and Run too—stiffed me with the rent." Ed said, annoyed.

"Well, her loss, our gain." Jo said as Sam and I took the information in. "Cause if Sammy loves it, it's good enough for me."

"Oh, Sweetie." Sam, smiling another fake smile as Jo smiled big and hugged him to her.

When he nudged her she stopped smiling for a second and then she pulled out a large wad of bills. Ed looked at her in awe and took the money from her, telling us it was nice to have us for tenants. Then we headed to the apartment and put all of our stuff down, me laughing a little, Jo's eyes twinkling as she realized she was the one amusing me.

"I'll flip you for the sofa." Jo told Sam. "I mean I just assume these crazy kids are going to take the bed."

"Does your mother even know you're here?" Dean asked her, loading his gun with rock salt as I sat down at the table.

Jo shrugged at him. "I told her I was going to Vegas."

"You think she's going to buy that?" Dean asked her.

"I'm not an idiot. I got Ash to lay a credit card trail all the way to the casinos." Jo replied.

"You shouldn't lie to your mom—you shouldn't be here either." Dean said, finishing loading his gun as I went over to my bag and I pulled out a lollipop.

She looked at the three of us and we all gave her along the same look: go back home. It wasn't that I didn't enjoy her company, it was just that she was Ellen's daughter, and Ellen had been showing me so much hospitality. If I got Jo hurt or killed, I could kiss any potential mother/pseudo daughter relationship with Ellen 'goodbye'. I figured maybe it was my place to be a little less hostile since I knew her better, but before I could speak, she was countering Dean.

"Well I am, so untwist your boxers and deal with it." She told Dean.

Sam stepped in. "Where'd you get all that money from?"

"Working at the Roadhouse." Jo replied.

"Hunters don't tip that well." I told her.

"They aren't good at poker either." Jo said a smug look on her face. "They're definitely worse than Jennifer."

I laughed loudly and Jo and I high-fived and then I swallowed and pulled my now ringing cell phone out of my jeans pocket. I showed it to Jo and she shook her head at me, telling me not to pick it up for her mother. I had to though, and Jo shook her head vigorously as I answered it as sweetly as I could. I could lie to Ellen…right?

"Where is she?" Ellen asked me before I could even say 'hello'.

I smiled as best I could. "Hey, Ellen—where's who?"

"Jo told me that she was heading to Vegas but I don't believe that for a second. Is she with you?" Ellen asked me.

"No, she's not here." I said, and Dean shot me a look—he wanted me to turn her in.

Ellen sighed loudly. "Are you sure?"

"Yeah, Ellen…I'm sure." I lied, biting my lip and wishing I hadn't. "I'll let you know if she shows though, all right?"

"All right. Bye, Lana." Ellen told me.

"Bye." I replied, and hung up the phone, turning to Jo. "Don't _ever_ make me lie to your mother again!"

Jo laughed a little and told me she'd try, and then the three of us set to looking at layouts of the apartment and researching it. Jo kept flipping a little knife around in her hand as Dean paced and Sam read some papers, and I looked some things up on my laptop. We needed to be smart about this, and soon Jo and I were pretty certain we had exactly what we needed.

"This place was built in 1924. It was originally an apartment converted into apartments a few months ago." Jo explained to the boys.

Dean nodded at her. "Yeah? What was here before 1924?"

"Nothing. An empty field." Jo replied.

"So the most likely scenario—someone died bloody in the building, and now he's back and raising Hell." Sam told us.

I shook my head. "Jo and I already checked—in the past 82 years, no violent deaths, unless you count a janitor that slipped on a wet floor."

"Would you sit down, please?" Jo asked Dean, pointing the blade at him casually.

Dean took a seat next to her, across from Sam and I looked up at her from next to Sam across from her and wanted to say something, but kept my mouth shut. This was about the hunt—not about anything else so I was going to keep it that way. Besides, I trusted Dean, and I trusted Jo…even after everything Dean had put me through.

"Try not to stab him with that." I told Jo, her smiling at my joke.

Dean rolled his eyes. "So have you checked Police reports? County Records?"

"Obituaries, mortuary reports, and seven other sources—I know what I'm doing." Jo told him.

"The jury's still out on that one." Dean replied as Sam looked at them with amusement. "Would you put the knife down?"

"Dean, focus," I told him as Jo slowly began to put it down.

Sam nodded at us. "Okay! So, um, it's gotta be something else then. Maybe some kind of cursed object that brought a spirit with it."

"We gotta scan the whole building. Whatever we can get to, right?" Jo asked him.

I nodded at her. "Right—so, you and Dean can take the top floors."

"We'd move faster if we split up." Jo protested, giving me a look.

"Oh, this is not negotiable." Dean told her and then looked at me. "Something tells me you're up to something, Lanni."

I smiled at him. "That would be because I am—I don't so much think it's an object…just a feeling."

"Well, go with your gut." Dean said, and then kissed me when he and Jo started to follow Sam to the door. "We'll look around for an object just in case, and you do your thing."

I nodded at him and told them to be careful, looking over the research some more and trying to focus. There was just something off about it—I just felt like something happened on that field. If something bad or big enough happened on the field way back when, then a spirit could have been angry enough to keep killing things…it was a good theory…but I had no proof.

Still, I poured over all of the information until they came back, none of them having found anything. I told Dean we shouldn't take the bed and to let Jo have it since she wasn't used to this 'roughing it' thing and Dean sighed but agreed with me. Then he tried to see if I was any closer on my hunch, and I told him I was, but there was nothing conclusive and he sat down next to me, really close.

"You want to nab the bedroom really quick to talk?" Dean asked me. "Just to talk, I promise…we need a good talk."

I nodded slowly, aware that Jo and Sam were watching us. "Yeah…"

Dean took my hand and we headed into the bedroom, him shutting the door behind us and then looking at me. It was about time we talked about things, and I took a deep breath and decided I should start us off. Instead, Dean started talking and I realized that he cared enough to try and work through this with me.

"I know that I shouldn't be forgiven for what I did and almost did with that waitress." Dean told me.

"Tiffany." I said with a nod, shoving my hands in my pockets.

Dean raised his eye brows. "What?"

"The waitress? Her name is Tiffany and she's really annoying because she seems to think she's going to get more of you than an almost lay. I know that I'm supposed to just forgive you here because you two didn't have sex, but there was making out and groping and it pisses me off that she got to have her hands and her mouth all over you." I told him, throwing my hands up in the air and then nodding at him to continue.

Dean came over to me and kissed me, and I sighed a little and pushed him off. I wanted to kiss him—I wanted to be made up with him—but kissing wasn't talking and we needed to talk. We needed to talk, and we needed to argue and Dean nodded at me when I took a step back and listened to me.

"I was wrong to push you away, Dean, but I needed to have some time to adjust. I _wanted_ to be a mother, and I wanted to have kids with you and I won't ever have that!" I told him, taking a breath. "I know I have to get over it, and just be all right with just having you be my family because it's not the end of the world, but…I'm always going to be upset about it. I was getting better, but then Tiffany. I bet _she_ can have kids!"

Dean put his hands on my shoulders. "Damn-it, Lanni, I don't _care_ about Tiffany! I don't even really remember anything about her! All that matters here is _you_! I just don't want to be without _you_! I could care less about children!"

"Do you really mean that?" I asked him, stepping closer to him.

"Of course I do," Dean replied, stroking my hair and smiling a little. "I know you wanted to be a mother and I know I can't make that better for you, but I need you to stop pushing me away because able to have kids or not, I just want you, okay? I want _you_. Sam told me that I just needed to come clean with you and _tell_ you that I wanted a family. I just didn't want to hurt you since I know this is killing you."

It was a sweet gesture and I appreciated the sentiment but then his words sank in—he had just contradicted himself. He didn't care less about children but he wanted a family with me? How did that make sense? And why was he talking about the baby and about having a family with me with _Sam_? I only told Sam the basics, and I had been very good about talking to Dean first and _then_ talking to Sam. What else was Dean hiding?

"You want kids?" I asked him.

Dean raised his eyebrows. "What? I thought I just said—"

"—you said Sam told you to just tell me you wanted a family…that kind of suggests you want kids." I told him, taking a step back.

"Damn-it, Lana! Why do you keep finding things to be mad about?" Dean asked me angrily. "I just want things to go back to normal."

I sighed loudly. "Dean, we can't go backwards! Do you, or do you _not_ want to have a kid or two with me someday?"

Dean ran his hand down his face in frustration and I nodded because it was so obviously the answer I'd been dreading—he did. He hadn't wanted it at first, but me being pregnant had made him want it, and now he couldn't stop thinking about it…just like I couldn't. Why did this have to happen to _me_? This completely wasn't fair because now the idea of maybe someday being a dad was in his mind and I couldn't make that happen for him.

"Dean, I can't give you children." I told him sadly, shrugging a little and shaking my head.

Dean came to me and kissed me, which made part of me want to cry, but when his hands went to my waist and he hoisted me up, I gave in. I wanted to be close to him and even though I was heartbroken that I couldn't give him what he wanted, I wanted him. He loved me, and even though I couldn't have any kids for him when our hunting was over, I was glad that he still wanted to be with me.

"Like I said: I just want _you_, Lanni. Besides, there are other ways to have a baby and we don't have to think about it now—we can cross that bridge in the future when and if we're ready for it." Dean told me, lying me down on the bed and kissing me again.

I smiled a little against his lips. "You've thought about that?"

Dean nodded and stroked my hair, opening his mouth to say something but a knock interrupted us as my hands went to Dean's belt. It kind of annoyed me that I hadn't gotten to have sex at all lately, and though annoyed when Jo's voice came floating through the door, I knew it wasn't her fault. Dean told her we were going to come out and get ready to research a little and turn in, and then he kissed me, sweet and slow and I smiled at him.

"I'm glad we yelled." I told him sincerely.

Dean nodded and got off of me. "Me too, Lanni…me too."

xx

Jo and I didn't end up sleeping—we stayed up and even made a coffee run together, pouring over the research. Sam slept on the bed while Dean slept on the couch, and when it got a little later in the morning and Sam woke up, he went out to make another coffee run and Jo and I just went over things as she flipped her knife. I'd found out that the knife was her father's, and she had lost him to a hunt when she was little.

"I don't have any ideas." I said dismally, looking at Jo. "I think my theory is retarded."

Jo smiled at me. "I don't and better yet, Dean doesn't."

"Yeah, but Dean also knows he has things to make up to me so he's intentionally being the good boyfriend." I told her with a laugh. "Speaking of my handsome princess—I think he's waking up."

Jo laughed and we both looked over at the couch, Dean stirring and grunting a little. He looked over at us and squinted, closing his eyes and then opening them again, focusing on Jo and me peering at him.

"Morning, Princess." Jo told Dean.

"Where's Sam?" Dean groaned.

I smiled at him. "Went to get coffee."

"Ohh. My back." Dean said as he sat up. "How'd you sleep on that big, soft bed?"

"Jo and I actually didn't sleep at all." I informed him, Jo nodding. "We've just been going over everything."

Dean nodded slowly and then crossed over to his bag, Jo and I watching his every movement. He rummaged through it and pulled a knife out, coming over to the table and holding it out to Jo. She looked at him, confused and I shot him a look, knowing what was coming next and feeling bad that Jo was going to have to talk about it.

"What's this for?" Jo asked him.

"It'll work a Hell of a lot better than that little pig stick you keep twirling around." Dean replied and studied the knife she handed to him.

Jo took a breath and pointed to the initials on her knife. "William Anthony Harvelle."

Dean noticed that he had stepped on some pretty fragile territory and he nodded as I looked at Jo and smiled sadly. The two of us had bonded over our fallen fathers already, and now Dean was going to be let into the discussion. Not that I could really talk so much about my birth father, but more like Marcus because he had raised me through my teenage years sans my 19th year.

"I'm sorry, my mistake." Dean said after a pause, and they traded back knives.

"What do you—what do you remember about your Dad? What's the first thing that pops into your head?" Jo asked Dean, smiling at him as he shook his head. "Come on, tell me."

The look on her face made something inside of me move, and I looked down at my phone and played with the flippy top as Dean spoke up. She really just wanted to bond with all of us and be accepted and I was glad to be able to call her my friend. Besides, when Dean started his story I had to smile a little more because he'd already told me the same story and so I listened and poured over the information again.

"I was 6 or 7, and, uh, he took me shooting for the first time—bottles on the fence, that kind of thing. I bull's-eyed every one of them." He said smiling as he sat down. "And he would smile, like…I don't know."

"He must have been proud." Jo told him.

Dean chuckled a little. "What about your Dad?"

"I was still in pigtails when my Dad died, but, I remember him coming home from a hunt. He'd burst through that door like—like he was Steve McQueen or something—and he'd sweep me up into his arms, and I'd breathe in that old leather jacket of his…and my mom—who was sour and pissed from the moment he left—started smiling again." Jo said, smiling a little as she remembered it. "And we were…we were a family. You wanna know why I want to do the job? For him. It's my way of being close to him. Now tell me, what's wrong with that?"

"There's nothing wrong with that, Jo." I told her, reaching out and squeezing her hand, smiling when she smiled back at me. "Now want to hear some good new about this hunt you've found us?"

Jo beamed at me. "What good news?"

"You know how you told me I was just looking in the wrong place and _obviously_ something had to have happened on the grounds?" I asked her.

"Yeah…" She said, getting more and more excited, Dean chuckling at us.

I squealed a little. "Well this place was built next to a jail! People were hung over this very ground, and there's a list of 157 names we need to narrow down, but this is what we're dealing with!"

Jo beamed at me and we scooted closer together, pouring over the material as Sam burst in the door with the coffee. She and I started to go through the names as Sam handed the coffee to us all and then she would occasionally ask me if I got any vibes off of the names. It was pretty nice to have a girl friend like Jo around who like Jen, believed in me and what I could do since I was kind of a freak.

"That one!" I exclaimed as Jo pointed to a name. "Herman Webster Mudgett."

Sam waved his hands. "Wait a minute, wait a minute…wasn't that H. H. Holmes' real name?"

"You gotta be kidding me." Dean said, chuckling a little.

"Jen says she sent you an e-mail about it." Jo said, handing me my phone as it went off. "You know, I think you, me and Jen would make a really amazing team."

I smiled at her. "Agreed."

I opened up my laptop and brought up the e-mail, clicking on the attachment, Dean coming to read over my shoulder. He nodded at it as Sam read too, me pretty proud of myself for the teamwork that Jo and I were accomplishing.

"Yep. Holmes was executed at Moyamensing on May 7, 1896." Dean read aloud.

"H. H. Holmes himself." Sam replied, a little excited. "Come on. I mean, what are the odds?"

Jo looked at the three of us. "Who is this guy?"

"The term 'multi-murderer'—they coined it to describe Holmes." I explained to her. "He was America's first serial killer before anybody even knew what a serial killer was."

"Yeah, he confessed to 27 murders. Some put the toll to over a hundred." Sam added.

"And his flavor of choice—petite blondes." Dean said, the three of us looking at Jo. "He used, uh, chloroform to kill them…which is what I smelled in the hallway last night. At his place cops found human remains, bone fragments, and long locks of bloody blonde hair. Boy, he sure knew how to pick 'em."

Jo nodded slowly. "We just find the bones, salt them and burn them, right?"

"It's not that easy." Sam replied as I nodded.

"His body is buried in town, but it's encased in a couple tons of cement." I told her as I scrunched up my face. "Story goes he didn't want people to mutilate his corpse, cause you know, it's what he used to do."

Sam cleared his throat. "You know something? We might have an even bigger problem than that."

"How does it get bigger than that?" Jo asked, miffed.

"Holmes built an apartment building in Chicago—they called it the Murder Castle." Sam told her. "The whole place was a death factory. They had trap doors, acid vats, Quicklime pits—he built these secret chambers…inside the walls."

I nodded at him. "He'd lock his victims in, keep them alive for days. Some he'd suffocate, others he let starve to death."

"So Theresa could still be alive? Inside _these_ walls." Jo told us.

Sam and I nodded and Dean ran his hand down his face as the wheels turned in all of our heads. We needed to work and we needed to work even faster if we were truly going to get this done. Dean was the first to rise and he looked directly at Sam as Jo and I exchanged looks and then looked up at him.

"We need sledgehammers. Crobars. We gotta knock down these walls anywhere big enough to hide a girl." Dean told his brother.

I nodded at him. "There's something more, I know it—it just doesn't seem like the end."

"What more could there be?" Jo asked.

"You guys go on and get in those walls, and I'm going to do a spell." I explained to them.

Jo looked at me. "A what? Lana you told me you didn't do that…and if you are going to, can't you just cast out spirits?"

"Unlike common belief, Jo, we don't just hold séances and cast out spirits—it's about self defense—like karate. Well, at least those of us that don't use our powers just to kill people and to go to other planes. Our powers link us to the earth—that's what Jen and I were taught when we were really little and being exposed to our powers. I'm going to meditate a bit and find him, and you three check the walls." I explained, and then took her hand, her turning and looking at me as she stood. "You had better be careful Jo—I don't want to lose you to him, all right? That being said—if you two let anything happen to her, I am killing you."

Jo smiled at me and squeezed my hand reassuringly, Sam smiling at me and nodding, Dean leaning down and kissing me swiftly. I told them to be safe and keep each other close, and then when they left and shut the door behind them I sat on the floor and took candles out of my bag, putting them around in a circle and then pouring salt around me, because this could get dangerous. As I lit the candles and then sat cross-legged on the floor, I closed my eyes and began to chant Latin under my breath. I repeated the same phrase over and over, and then I felt something—there was a presence beneath me.

As I tried to pinpoint it, I heard Sam and Dean come in, and then my cell phone rang, which broke my concentration. Luckily, I had gotten what I needed, but I had really hoped to transport myself to where Theresa was so I knew her _exact _location. It would have to wait, however…Ellen was calling. I was pretty sure this wasn't going to be a very happy phone call, but I had to answer since I realized Sam and Dean had come back _without _Jo…shit!

"Hey, Ellen." I told her, knowing my fear seeped through.

Ellen was pissed. "You lied to me, Lana! I trusted you, and you lied! Ash told me everything—he's a genius, but he folds like a cheap suit! Put my daughter on the phone right now!"

"Ellen, I—" I began.

"—_now_,Lana!" Ellen repeated.

I took a deep breath as Sam and Dean looked at me. "The ghost got her, Ellen—but I swear to you that we're going to get her back!"

There was silence and then she was back. "I'll be on the first flight out there—see you soon."

I swallowed and nodded as she abruptly hung up the phone, and then closed the flippy top and looked at the boys. Dean and Sam were freaking out and went to pour over some maps, me standing up. It drew attention back to me and I took a deep breath, both of them focusing all attention on me. We had to save Jo, and we had to work fast before Holmes killed Jo and we had to explain to her mother that we had gotten her only daughter killed.

"Under the building—the old sewer system." I explained to them.

Dean nodded at that. "Let's go."

"You okay, Lan?" Sam asked as I started to head out with them and wobbled a little.

"A little woozy, but good. Let's go." I replied smiling at them reassuringly.

"You sure?" Sam asked. "Cause you can stay here."

I shook my head. "I know where the opening is—bring your EMF radar."

As we headed out, we walked around for a little bit before Sam's radar started picking things up. Without using the spell to directly pinpoint anything, we relied on the EMF radar, and found the place where the opening should be, dug it up, opened the hatch, and went down the little ladder part, crawling on our hands and knees in utterly filthy water, using our flashlights in the darkness.

When we got to the grate we needed, I shuddered convulsively and Sam reached out a hand to steady me. I could feel the strength of Holmes' presence, and I needed more than anything to just get this over with and do what Ellen had said I needed to do: learn to control my powers. Besides, I needed to save Jo and when I saw the ghost, I definitely got the adrenaline I needed to get more focused on the case at hand.

"Hey!" Dean cried, shooting at the ghost.

"No!" Holmes cried, disappearing, but we knew he wasn't gone.

I hurried over to Jo. "Are you all right?"

She nodded at me as Dean tossed Sam the crobar as Sam and I searched for the other girl who was alive. We found her, and Sam got her out and then we made sure Jo was really okay, and she wanted to get the Hell of here like I did, but Dean said she wasn't going to go just yet. I smacked his arm because I did _not_ like where this was going, but at the same time I knew we didn't have any other options.

"Remember when I said that you being bait was a bad plan? Well now it's kind of the only one we've got." Dean told her.

I reached out and took Jo's hand. "We've got your back, Jo—I won't let _anything _happen to you…_if _you want to do this."

"Lana, I can do this." Jo told me sincerely.

I nodded slowly and then we left Jo sitting on the ground with her back to the grate, where we were hiding, and she had her knife with her. The spirit appeared, and then we let bags of salt drop, and it formed a circle around him. He started screaming, and was really angry with us for trapping him, Jo standing up.

"Scream all you want, you Dick! But there's no way you're stepping over that salt!" Jo screamed at him.

I smiled at her and then we all got ready to fill in the place with cement, hoping to trap the ghost there forever. Jo, Sam and I stood at the hatch while Dean went to grab a cement truck and I smiled at Sam and Jo bonding. They were both dear to me, and I was really glad that they were both all right.

"So…is this job as glamorous as you thought it would be?" Sam asked Jo as we looked down the hatch.

"Well, except for all the pee-your-pants kind of terror, yeah." She admitted. "But that Theresa girl is gonna live a life because of us. Isn't that worth it?" Jo asked.

Sam nodded at her, smiling. "Yeah…yeah it is."

"Hey, what if somebody finds that sewer down there, or water washes the salt away?" Jo asked him suddenly.

"Both very fine points." Sam replied.

I smiled at him. "That's exactly why we're waiting here for Dean—he's grabbing a cement truck so that he can trap the ghost down there."

"You ripped off a cement truck?" Jo asked Dean as he and Sam got it ready to pour cement down the hole after Dean parked it.

"I'll give it back." Dean shrugged and we all smiled at each other. "Well that oughta keep him down there until Hell freezes over."

The four of us went to grab something to eat before Ellen called again and said she was at the airport. Dean drove us there and we all piled into the car, driving to the Roadhouse in the dark—it was an awkward ride. Ellen was mad at all of us, and I was pretty certain that no matter what we said, she was going to stay upset with us.

"Well, you—you really weren't kidding about flying out, were you?" Dean asked, trying to smile in the awkward silence.

I made a face. "Put a cork in it, Dean—not the time for jokes."

I sat in the middle of the back seat, Sam on my right and Jo on my left, and the three of us looked at each other as Ellen sat there silent in the passenger seat. Jo and Sam smiled at each other and I couldn't help but lean forward and try to work my magic on Ellen. I had lied to her and she was pretty certain that there was a _lot _I was going to have to do to win back her trust, but I was willing to do it.

"How about we listen to some music?" Dean asked, turning on the radio.

"You're cold as ice." The song began, but Ellen reached over and turned it off, and we all looked at each other again, listening to some more silence.

"This is gonna be a long car ride." Dean said and sighed when I spoke up.

I cleared my throat. "Ellen, can I—"

"—no." Ellen replied.

"Yeah, okay." I told her, and snuggled back into the seat, Sam and Jo both reaching out and taking my hands, Jo eying Sam's hand and then looking away quickly.

I frowned because her hearing Dean and I argue before—even if we _did_ make up—and now Sam holding my hand? That was seriously not a good thing and I wasn't stupid enough to think that this was going to end well. Still, we all sat there in silence until we got to the Roadhouse sometime in the middle of the next day and as Ellen dragged Jo into the Roadhouse, Sam and I followed.

"Ellen…this is my fault, okay?" I told her, sighing. "_I_ lied to you. I'm sorry that I did it, but Jo just worked so hard on this hunt and she did a great job."

Dean nodded. "I think her Dad would be proud."

Jo smiled at us, but Ellen got even angrier. "Don't you dare say that—not you." Ellen told him angrily as the smile was wiped off of Jo's face. "I need a moment with my daughter—alone."

The three of us nodded, and then went out of the saloon, leaning on the car and looking at each other. I felt terrible that Jo was going to get in trouble, and even though I knew it was kind of her fault for running off, I shouldn't have lied to her mother. On the other hand, I felt like Jo deserved to be able to do her own hunt when she had worked so hard on researching it—she had been a big help. Maybe…maybe this was just a sign that there was no way I should be bringing children into this world—maybe this was why I had miscarried: my terrible karma.

"That can't go well." I told the boys, looking towards the Roadhouse.

Dean reached out and wrapped his arm around my waist, pulling me to him. "What do you think is going on in there?"

"Probably a bit of a mother/daughter heart to heart." I told him, leaning into him.

"Ellen looked hurt as well as pissed." Sam added.

The three of us nodded and then we waited in silence until Jo came out, taking one look at Dean and then shaking her hurt, angry head a bit and walking off away from us. I hurried after her first, but the angry look had been shot at Dean. Still, I knew that part of this was my fault and I really wanted to help Jo out as much as I could.

"That bad, huh?" I asked herm trying to lighten the mood.

"Not right now." She said as Sam leaned on the car and Dean caught up to me.

Dean reached out to touch her shoulder. "What happened? Hey, talk to us."

"Get off me!" Jo cried throwing away his hand as he rested it on her should.

"Sorry. I'll see you around." Dean said, turning and walking back towards Sam as I stood there rooted in spot.

"Dean…" Jo began, and then Dean turned around and there was some silence. "It turns out my Dad had a partner on his last hunt. Funny, he usually worked alone—this guy too—but…but I guess my father figured he could trust him. A mistake. The guy screwed up, got my Dad killed."

I swallowed. "Jo…"

"What does this have to do with—" Dean asked.

"—it was your father, Dean." Jo said, cutting him off. "Your father was his partner and he was sent out on the hunt by your mother…Lana."

"What?" Dean asked as I shifted uncomfortably.

I swallowed and though at first I was completely surprised, it kind of made sense—John had hunted with my mother in the past. Still, I hated that John and my mother were part of some of Jo's most painful memories. She was fatherless, and it was my mother's and Dean's and Sam's father's fault…I felt terrible. Remember that thing that I said about karma? Yeah, let's go with that.

Jo took a breath. "Why do you think John never came back, never told you about us? 'Cause he couldn't look my mom in the eye after that, that's why."

"Jo—" Dean began.

"—just go. Just get out of here…please, just leave." She told him and looked at me sadly. "I'm sorry, I just can't."

I nodded at her and she turned to walk away, Dean looking at the ground and then looking up at me. We had some more things to talk about, and I had some things to come clean about. We were finally pretty much patched up, and my past was coming back to bite me in the ass. This was just perfect…

**Note: As you can see this chapter was _way_ different than the episode of it that aired on TV. Mainly that's because Lana is in the mix and she's the one that's actually close to Jo and to Ellen, so there were parts that had to be maneuvered around the characters. Besides, I had a lot of fun writing it the way that it is now and I love slowly unearthing Lana's past. Who wants to know all about that? We are sooooooo close to learning _all about _Lana's birth parents! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	7. Meeting Kate

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Alright, I'm about to introduce a really important character and I hope you guys will love her as much as I do—she's going to be a _big _part of the story and a big part of Sam's life. She's also quite the pistol. (See, originally I tried to make Lana the female Sam and Kate the female Dean so they complimented the boys, but they took on characters of their own, lol.)**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

"Wait a minute…_what_?" Dean asked me angrily as Sam sighed loudly and put his head in his hands.

I was fairly certain that the second I opened my mouth to explain things to them there was going to be a fight and I _really_ didn't want to fight right now. If there was one thing that I wanted to do right then, it was make-up with Dean for once and for all and try to put all of the bad stuff behind us. On top of it all though, _Sam_ was disappointed in me and I wasn't sure if I could handle that too.

"I wish that you had just told us the truth from the beginning! Why do you feel the need to hide so much from us?" Dean asked me, standing up and looking at me.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat. "I thought I was protecting the two of you."

"Well you're _not_! You're _hurting_ us!" Dean exclaimed, Sam shaking his head and sighing some more because he really didn't want to get involved in our fight right then—he and I would talk later, I knew it.

"Okay, I made a mistake, all right?" I yelled at him. "My _mother_ is the one that kind of gave birth to me, okay? It's not like you guys go around sharing a whole bunch of information with me about _your _parents! Yeah, I get that your father kind of told me about my mother being a hunter but…but it didn't seem important. Wow, my mother was a hunter that just happened to know your parents _before _John became a hunter—from what he told me, she was a big part of helping him to get as far as he did. She was a hunter and John trusted her! I'm sorry that she was involved with the death of Jo's father, but come on! Why are you mad at me besides the lying?"

Dean ran his hand down his face. "You _lied_ to us, Lanni! _Lied_!"

"I'm not arguing about this anymore!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up into the air. "I'm done! I'm going to bed!"

Dean growled but nodded at me, and I took a deep breath and went into the bathroom, deciding to take a shower. As I stripped down though, Dean came into the bathroom too and shut the door behind him, making me roll my eyes and get into the shower making a face at Dean when he came to join me in there. To be fair, I really wanted to be with him, but he was mad at me and he had every right to be and I didn't know how into angry sex I was right then because honestly, the two of us only seemed to fight, fight and then fight a whole lot more.

"If you want me to be in the mood—" I began, but nodded into the kiss that came to silence me—apparently I was _totally_ into angry sex right then. "Okay, I'm on board."

Dean nodded and hoisted me up, me wrapping my legs around his waist and moaning a little into his mouth at the friction between us when he pressed me up against the shower wall. He was still mad at me, but he knew that part of what I said had made sense, and the two of us were beyond done with being pissed at each other. We wanted things to go back to normal and for that to happen, we had to be pro-active, and I had to keep Sam and Dean _away_ from things involving my past.

"You need to be more truthful with me." Dean explained, pressing his body closer to mine and stroking my hair as I moaned. "It's been quite a while for us, hasn't it?"

I nodded at him slowly. "For _us_, yes…for _me_…not for _you_."

"You're going to upset me again." Dean stated, and I knew that, but I couldn't stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

"Well that's why they call it angry sex." I replied with a shrug.

Dean started to protest but I pressed lips to his, squeezing him with my legs to urge him to just shut-up. He heeded, kissing me lovingly suddenly, which made me pause, and it made Dean pull away, looking me in the eye with dozens of questions—one of which was most definitely 'why did we stop?'. I leaned my head back against the shower wall to get a better look at him and cocked my head to one side, smiling a little when he cupped my face with his hand, his thumb running gently along my wet cheek.

"You're suddenly all sweet." I told him, biting my lip.

He nodded slowly. "Honestly, as annoyed as I am that you lied, Sam and I have past too we haven't spilled to you since it's not putting you in any danger, and you don't know everything about your biological mother—you told us that and I believe you…besides…it's been a long time since you and I did this and it shouldn't be angry sex, it really shouldn't. Some other time when we've gotten back into our regular sex habits we'll do the hot, angry sex, okay?"

"I love you." I told him, kissing him softly and helping us to reach the next incredibly satisfying level.

xx

**Kate's POV**

Perhaps it was just me, but I was beginning to think that my life needed to have something else in it—something more than what it had in it now. I had a great life, don't get me wrong. I had two younger sisters that I absolutely adored, and then there was hunting, which I had grown to be quite the amazing little hunter at. In fact I was so good that people knew my name and even came to me for help when they got stuck, so that's saying something.

Kalli was doing pretty well on her own. She was 20 and dealing with college, but at the same time she was always ready to practically dive right into a hunt when I suggested it. I guessed that she would rather be doing that than papers and tests and that was fine with me because our parents practically bred us to be hunters. Even so…my mother was never really into the idea even though she loved my father more than anything and loved him just the way that he was.

After Kalli and I were born, my mother wanted my father not to hunt as often even though she wasn't opposed to Kalli and I learning the ways since she wanted us to be able to thoroughly protect ourselves. He agreed and then there was Kat, who is 16 now, and like Mom in the respect that she wants a normal life. She knows how to take care of herself, but if it was a choice of a life or hunting, she would choose a life—no questions asked…besides, she has her eyes on this boy she's always been into, Adam Milligan.

Needless to say, I wasn't needed.

See, there's —23 and the oldest, just a few months old than Lana and needing to stop feeling so incredibly cooped up. My job wasn't exactly what I wanted and honestly? Honestly, I loved the thrill that came with hunting. Guns, knives, fire, fake IDs—it was better than drugs, let me tell you. That's why I knew that no matter what happened, this was going to be my life…so I called up a good friend of mine: Lana.

"Wow, didn't expect to hear from you," Lana said with a laugh.

I smiled and shrugged my shoulders. "What can I say, Lana? I'm incredibly bored and I figure that you have a sweet deal right now, right? Traveling with two hunters and getting laid finally and all of that? I want to do something too."

"This wouldn't have anything to do with your bad break up with Coop, would it?" Lana asked me slowly.

Cooper Graham…may his name never be mentioned again.

"This has to do with me wanting to help," I responded.

Lana laughed and I knew what was coming next. "Alright. I'll let Sam and Dean know that you're on your way."

"Thanks, Cuz. See you soon."

We hung up and I got a duffle all packed, making sure my lucky gun and my lucky knife were packed away on my person and then I went to the airport. I could have driven, but two cars seemed like overkill and I wanted more than anything to just have something to do right now. I had my gun permit on me and so I headed out, enjoying my plane ride and seeing Lana and a really tall man next to her at the airport that I _really_ hoped wasn't Dean.

That would be just my luck though—get a lady boner for my cousin's boyfriend.

"Katie!" Lana called out, coming for me and hugging me as I hugged her tight. "It's so good to see you! This is Kate."

The tall man laughed an incredibly sexy laugh. "I got that. Redhead, you called her 'Katie'…"

"You catch on quick," I told him, smirking and holding out my hand for him to shake it. "I'm Kate Newman. I really hope you're not Dean."

"No, I'm his brother, Sam. Dean's out with the car." Sam chuckled, shaking my hand. "We've heard a lot about you—from Lana and from hunters at the Roadhouse. You're quite the hunter."

"I bet I could learn a thing or two from you, Handsome…"

xx

**Lana's POV**

The next case we had was amazingly bad—everything that could go wrong did go wrong and we really needed to figure a way out. Sam and I had been sitting in the motel, thinking about where Dean and Kate had gone to when we had been arrested and dragged in for questioning. Now we were sitting in the police station, waiting for another cop to come in and question us and I was resting my head on Sam's shoulder, his fingers running through my hair to comfort me as Kate eyed us.

The moment they had met, Kate had fixed her eyes and Sam and I would have been more worried about her feelings had I not been solely thinking about Dean and how much trouble we were all in. I didn't even know if Sam was aware of Kate's attraction to him though he couldn't be that stupid because she had been flirting with him the whole week and even though she had her own motel room, she wanted him…and bad.

We had all been doing a hunt and we separated into teams—me and Sam and then Kate and Dean because it would make us all focus better—and then we had gotten separated from Kate and Dean, who had been gone far too long looking into the deaths of some people: a vengeful spirit had killed them, we were positive about that…but you can't really tell cops that, now can you? Yeah, not really something to run around trying to tell the world, unfortunately.

"This is ridiculous." I told Sam and he nodded, looking at me as I crossed my arms over my chest.

He put his fingers under my chin and made me look at him. "Are you okay? You just seem more agitated than normal."

"I think I'll be fine." I admitted, even though I _was_ jittery and my leg was bouncing.

"You sure?" He asked, stroking my hair some more.

I nodded at him and smiled when we made eye contact. "Yeah, I just think that us not being out there, and the spirit still being there, is wrong. I hate when we get detoured like this, and then there's Dean—Dean's innocent."

Sam kissed my forehead and I smiled a little more, though I didn't feel as good about it when Kate cleared her throat and looked over at the door as the female cop walked back in. She had this look on her face like she knew something, and I really hated that that look was followed by glances in between me and Sam—obviously she thought the two of us were an item. Whatever…it wasn't like Sam and I hadn't been mistaken for a couple before—we could pull that off acting if we had to and as a hunter, Kate would understand more than anyone else would.

"Well that answers one question." She said aloud—score to me for reading people well.

I laughed a little. "Oh yeah? What question is that?"

"Obviously she thinks you two are screwing, which, they're not." Kate responded, smiling that cheeky smile that Dean sported sometimes—like hunter, like hunter.

"Thought you might be thirsty," the woman said, setting down three cups of coffee in a coffee holder and some files, ignoring Kate and playing her cards the way she thought she needed to.

"Ah, you're the good cop. So where's the bad cop?" Sam asked her.

She looked at Sam. "Oh, he's with your brother."

She looked pretty smug, and Sam and I were pretty unsure about that look and knew one of us had to speak up. Since I was the quickest on the draw when it came to speaking when I shouldn't, I smiled at her and opened my mouth. Yeah, I know it's already hard to believe, what with Kate in the mix now, but I was still bad at timing.

"And you're holding us why?" I asked her.

She motioned towards the door. "Well he's being held on suspicion of murder. You three? We'll see."

"Murder?" Sam and I asked at once.

"You sound genuinely surprised." She told us. "Or are you just that good of actors?"

Her fake smile was getting to me and I gave her an annoyed look as Sam spoke up. I liked that he had stepped in this time because I would have tried to wipe the look off of her face, but at the same time I was worried. I mean I knew that there was a chance that we'd get caught, but definitely not for murder…something else was going on here, and Kate, Sam and I were _not_ in the loop.

"Who is he supposed to have murdered?" Sam asked her.

She nodded at him. "We'll get around to that."

"You know why Dean and I didn't come back?" Kate asked us. "Cause they came around and arrested me from the car and then got Dean."

"Well you can't just hold us here without formal charges." Sam told her and I crossed my arms over my chest and sighed loudly, wanting out.

"Well actually we can for 48 hours, but you being a Pre-Law student would know that." She replied.

I looked up at her. "What the Hell?"

"I know all about you, Sam…you're 23 years old. No job. No address. Your mother died when you were a baby. Your father's whereabouts are unknown…and then there's the case of your brother, Dean, whose demise was, well, exaggerated. Feel free to jump in at any time." She said, but Sam and I just looked at her and shrugged a little. "Shy? Fine, I'll keep going. Your family moved around a lot when you were a kid. Despite that, you were a straight-A student—got into Stanford with a full ride." She said, and then it got quiet and she turned to us as Sam sat with his arms across his chest and I rested my hand on his shoulder, stroking his shoulder softly. "Then about a year ago, there was a fire in your apartment. One fatality, Jessica Moore, your girlfriend. After she died, you fell off the grid—left behind everything."

"I needed some time off…to deal." Sam replied softly.

She nodded and looked at Kate. "Then there's you and Lana, Kate."

"And what could you possibly know about me?" I asked her, knowing full well that she didn't have the information she _truly_ needed on me.

The woman looked at me. "For one, you and Kate here are cousins and she's really only a few months older than you but from what we've observed, you seem to be the motherly one. She doesn't have run ins with the law, but she's quite the traveler. Kate's got it all—a choice of any college she wants, money, parents, siblings—in fact you have a little sister living somewhere in Wisconsin."

That made me do a double take…I thought all these years that Annie was dead. It had never crossed my mind that my mother would split us up when she handed me over to Marcus and Bethany all those years ago. Annie was alive?

"Kate's 23 and you're 22. No job, but here you have an address in Lawrence, Kansas. You were good in school, but quit college. You were never in trouble with the law until these two came into the picture. Occasionally you use your credit card, so we have blips of you on the radar, but most times—most times we have no idea where you are or what you're doing. The only time you even had to _speak _to the authorities was when your adopted parents were killed in a fire while you were at school—there's no record of your birth father, but your birth mother is listed on your birth certificate." She explained and then motioned to Sam. "By the looks of it, and by the ring we confiscated upon your arrest, it looks to me like you have yourself a boyfriend and a very dysfunctional group to travel with…am I right with any of this? Feel free to chime in at any time and prove me wrong—I mean I could have my facts off."

I narrowed my eyes at her. "If you absolutely _must_ know, the ring was from Dean."

"Well, well, well. You just got close to both of them didn't you?" She asked me, hoping to get more out of me.

"The things we do for love." I shrugged as I rolled my eyes, the sarcasm dripping off of my voice.

"So after this fire with Jessica, you just decided to take some time off?" She asked, turning the attention back to Sam.

Sam nodded at her. "Yeah, so I'm taking a road trip with my brother, and then we met up with Lana along the way vacationing with Kare, and they joined us."

"And how's that going for you?" She asked him.

"Great." Sam said, nodding. "I mean…we saw the second largest ball of twine. Awesome."

She sighed and walked over to the table after Sam and I sat down, really wanting us to stop beating around the bush. For some reason she actually thought we were going to hand Dean over to her, but Dean wasn't killing people—an angry spirit was, and we couldn't prove it from in here. So really, all Kate, Sam and I could do was play along, but we didn't have to make it easy on the cops at all…why would we do _that_?

"We ran Dean's fingerprints through Iafis—got over a dozen possible hits." She replied, leaning towards us.

Sam scoffed at her. "'Possible' hits, which makes them worthless."

"But makes you wonder…what are we gonna find when we run your prints, Sam?" She asked him softly.

"Well, uh," Sam said, smiling and then pounding his fist into the table playfully, "be sure to let me know, all right? May I?"

She nodded at him when he motioned to the coffee and I had to admit that the smell of it was getting to me. Upon taste I realized that it was actually pretty bad, but it was coffee, and coffee always seemed to actually calm me down. Besides, if Kate, Sam and I were going to get through this, then there was no way in the world that we were going to do it without caffeine.

"Sam, you seem like a good kid, and you're going to make Lana a lot happier than Dean ever would—it's not your fault Dean's your brother." She explained to him.

I shot her a look. "Way to pick sides. Besides, once Kate lays a claim, she gets her man."

"Well said," Kate said with a chuckle and a wink sent Sam's way.

"We can't pick our family," she continued. "Right now detectives in St. Louis are exhuming a corpse, trying to figure out how your brother faked his own death after torturing all those young women. Dean's a bad guy…his life is over…yours doesn't have to be."

"You want me to turn against my own brother?" Sam asked her skeptically.

She shook her head. "No—we caught him cold, red-handed at the Karen Giles murder scene. We just need you three to fill in some missing pieces."

"Why would we do that?" I asked, Sam's eyes asking the same question.

"Because I can talk to the D.A., make a deal for you three. You can get on with your lives…Dean's as good as gone. Kate was in the car on her phone, we can't pin a thing on her besides being outside the house." She said, and silence followed until Sam decided to speak up.

"My Dad and Tony Giles were good friends." Sam began and I sighed and drank more coffee. "They were in the service together—we've known him since we were kids, you know? So we came as soon as we heard about his death."

xx

"_There you go." Sam said, handing Dean some coffee as he sat down with us._

_I smiled and looked at Sam. "Anthony Giles."_

"_Who's Anthony Giles?" Sam asked and I shrugged because I was simply trying to be a know-it-all—it had been **Dean** who had said the name._

"_The Baltimore lawyer—working late in his office. Check it out." Dean said, taking the lid off the coffee and drinking it as I sipped my latte._

"_His throat was slit, but the room was clean." Sam read. "Huh. No DNA, no prints."_

_Dean smiled at him. "Keep reading it gets better."_

"_Security cameras failed to capture footage of the assailant." Sam continued._

"_Either somebody tampered with the tapes…" Dean began._

"_Or we have a silent killer." Sam said as I nodded._

_Dean clicked his tongue in response. "My favorite kind. So what do you think, Scully? Check it out?"_

"_I'm not Scully—you're Scully." Sam said, tossing the paper at him._

"_No, I'm Mulder. You're a redheaded woman." Dean replied with a grin._

_As sexy as I thought it was that Dean was all into X-Files and he was picking on his adorable brother, I made a face when he looked at me. It was only a matter of time before he gave me a name, or he would simply leave me out of it as he did 50% of the time. I actually __**liked**_ _X-Files, so I wanted to be part of it._

"_Who am I?" I asked him. "Some alien?"_

_Dean shook his head. "Nah, you're Dogget."_

"_Great…I'm a man." I said, and then Sam and I smiled at each other before I frowned as Dean walked away. "Snap! And the fans hated me at first!"_

"_Which reference now?" Kate asked as she came out of the shop with a fantastic looking Danish and a cup of coffee._

_I smiled at her. "X-Files."_

"_I take it Dean stole Mulder? Hey, Dean…I'll arm wrestle you for it." Kate said with a smile on her face, Sam smiling at her._

xx

Sam scoffed at the cop. "So, it would have been kind of hard for Dean to kill Tony, considering we weren't even in town at the time."

"Okay. Tell me what happened next." She told him.

"Okay, that's when we went to see Karen." I explained to her, wanting this over with and Dean freed so we could take care of the spirit and move on.

Kate nodded her head in agreement. "She was barely holding it together. We wanted to be there for you, you know?"

xx

"_Insurance…I totally forgot about the insurance." Karen explained to us sadly._

"_We're very sorry to bother you right now, but the company has to do its own investigation. You understand?" Kate asked soothingly._

_Karen nodded at us. "Yeah…yeah."_

"_If you could just tell us anything you remember about the night your husband died." I told her with a soft smile, because I genuinely felt bad about her situation, but we had to do what we had to do here to save lives._

"_Tony and I were supposed to have dinner. He called to tell me that he was having computer troubles and he had to work late," she said sadly. "That was it."_

_Sam, Kate, Dean and I nodded at her, taking the information in and yet knowing it was time to pry a little more. We needed to know what kind of weird things had happened—if weird things **had** happened—we still had to figure that in. Really, I was kind of just wanting to finish this up, be with Dean since the two of us were fighting less lately, and check in on Jen…that meant finishing up this conversation so we could finish the hunt._

"_Do you have any idea what could have done this to him?" Sam asked her softly, still trying to show concern for her even though he was trying to sound professional too._

_Karen shook her head. "No. No. It's like I told the police. I—I have no idea."_

"_Did Tony mention anything unusual to you?" Dean asked. "The days before his death?"_

"_Unusual?" She repeated._

_Dean nodded at her. "Yeah, like strange?"_

"_Strange?" She repeated._

"_You know, Karen, weird. Weird noises, visions, anything like that?" Dean asked again, trying to keep his cool._

_Sam cleared his throat, and the next couple seconds were filled with looks to get Dean to calm down, and then looks of compassion towards Karen when she looked at us. Dean was jumping the gun a little and it was going to freak Karen out and we all knew it—Kate especially, who pinched him and smiled because he barely reacted due to talking to Karen. Still, I couldn't deny that I wanted this over too, and so I just smiled at her and nudged Kate, who nodded at me._

"_He had a nightmare before he died." Karen informed us._

_Sam cautiously asked, "Uh, what kind of a nightmare?"_

"_He said he woke up in the middle of the night one night and there was a woman standing at the foot of the bed. Then he blinked and she was gone." Karen explained, weirded out by the question, and I couldn't blame her._

"_Did he say what she looked like?" Dean asked._

"_What the Hell difference does it make what she looked like?" Karen asked distraught._

_Sam and I exchanged looks with Dean as he fumbled for the right thing to say—this was delicate territory. The wrong thing could have us sent out her door without so much as another word, and we really couldn't do that. At the same time, there was no way to avoid this question, so we really just had to get it over with and who better to be blunt than Dean Winchester himself? Kate at least had some tact…_

_Dean smiled at her awkwardly. "Its, uh, just that our company is very thorough."_

"_He said she was pale and had dark red eyes." Karen replied, a little nastily._

xx

"So I gave Karen a hug, and told her to call us if she needed anything." Sam explained to the woman interrogating us. "And that was it. End of story."

"Sam, I am trying to help you here, but you have got to be honest with me—all three of you." The woman told us. "Now we have an eyewitness, someone who saw two men and two women, fitting you, your brother's and these two's description, breaking into Giles' office." She said, standing up and getting testy.

I shook my head at her. "Karen called us later. Said there was some stuff she wanted out of Tony's office but the police weren't letting her in, so we went and got it for her."

"Like a picture of the two of them in Paris and some other stuff." Kate told her, nodding.

I nodded and looked the woman in the eye. "Look, it was wrong to enter a crime scene, we get that—"

"—but she gave us a key." Sam finished for me, which wasn't actually the truth at all…then again, neither was most of our story we were feeding her, but at least it was the same.

xx

_Sam, Kate Dean and I went into the office and looked around with our flashlights in the dark room. I really hated it when we had to check out the dark, scary places, but that was just part of the job, so I accepted it. Besides, the four of us were together, which meant that we were going to be protected, and that was the important part._

"_Hey," Sam said, shining his flashlight on a bloody part of the floor. "Anthony Giles' body was found right about here. 'Throat slit so deep, part of his spinal cord was visible.'"_

_I smiled at his ready-to-use knowledge, but cringed. "Gross."_

_Dean whistled at the bloody floor. "What do you think? Vengeful spirit? Underline vengeful."_

"_Yeah, maybe, I mean he **did** see that woman at the foot of his bed." Sam reminded us._

_I went over to the desk and picked up a piece of paper, handing it to Dean and smiling because I knew I was being damn helpful. Actually, ever since I had kind of convinced myself that there was nothing that could really harm me, I'd been focusing on hunts a lot more and I knew that as thankful as they were, they missed the old me. In all honesty…I missed the old me too, but I didn't really know how to get her back and now Kate was here to not only be a pain in the ass, but be the smartass that everyone thought was adorable and fun, so I could get back on my feet whenever it was that I was actually ready to get back on my feet._

"_Hey. Look at this." Dean said, handing it to Sam._

_Sam looked it over. "Dana Shulps. What is that, a name?"_

"_I dunno, but it's everywhere." Dean said, looking at several papers where it was written over and over. "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy."_

"_Shut-up." I told him playfully when he chuckled, smacking his arm._

_He smiled at me after faking a hurt look, and then I looked at the glass desk as Sam saw what I saw. He leaned his face towards it and breathed his hot breath on it, the word "Dana Shulps" appearing again. That was definitely not something we'd seen before on a case like this, so we were on the right track, surprisingly._

"_Your area of expertise, Kate?" I asked her._

_Kate shook her head. "But I still get the vibe that this is a spirit and she is so pissed off that I worry about who is next on her list of victims."_

"_I agree with you on that, Kate…and I'd say we've officially crossed over into weird." Sam said, looking up at Dean, Kate and me._

_I nodded at him. "I'll say. I can't get a clear vibe in here either—obviously I'm still trying since Kate got one."_

_Actually, my vibes and Kate's vibes were two different things, but I had yet to tell the boys anything about the fact that my father was a demon. I figured now wasn't the time either, so I just passed it off as me still coping and they bought it, which was really all that mattered._

"_Maybe Giles knew her." Dean offered with a shrug._

"_Maybe it's the name of our pale, red-eyed mystery girl." Sam suggested, nodding at his brother._

"_Well, let's see what we can see." Dean said, and we all set to looking through papers._

_After a long while Dean and I got fed up and Dean waved his arms angry, motioning throwing something down. I giggled at him and then shrugged when he shot me a look for laughing at his obvious failure, and then he looked at Sam and Kate. He softened a little when I took his hand in mine, but still had to be his hot little drama queen self._

"_There's not a mention of a Dana Shulps anywhere in here." He said exasperatedly. "Or any other kind of frigging Shulps." He added, leaning on the doorframe._

_Sam sighed loudly. "Great."_

"_I take it you have nothing?" I asked Sam._

"_That would be correct. No Dana Schulps has either lived or died in Baltimore in the last 50 years at least." Sam replied as Dean and I got more frustrated._

"_This is really frustrating," Kate said as she leaned over Sam's shoulder._

_I caught Sam swallowing a little bit, breathing in the scent of Kate's perfume without actually smelling her and Dean smirked. He knew that Kate wanted Sam—and bad—in fact he had even been trying to get them to spend time alone together hoping that Kate would jump him. The thing was, Kate was getting over some heartbreak and even though she wanted Sam, she was respecting his fragile feelings too and I appreciated her for that. Besides, she knew the time and place for such things._

_I ran my hands down my face. "We've hit dead ends before, but not like this."_

"_So what now?" Dean asked, reaching out and pulling my body to his as we watched Sam type away at the computer and Kate hit on Sam with her body language and keeping her body near his and yet making it so it would be rude to go for her._

"_Well, I think I'm pretty close to cracking Giles' password. Maybe there's something in his personal files." Sam replied with a shrug._

_Dean nodded slowly. "And by 'close' you mean…"_

"_30 minutes maybe?" Sam offered to us._

_I sighed loudly and then looked at Dean, who looked at his watch and sighed loudly too. We were **both** rather stumped and bored, and though there were plenty of things we could think of to pass the time together, we had work to do…and Sam could **not** be left alone with an obviously in the mood Kate, to work without us—or not work if Kate so chose to work her magic on Sam._

"_Awesome. I guess that means we just get to, uh, hang out. That's awesome." Dean said, and he and I headed other to sit across the desk from Sam and Kate, me sitting on Dean's lap and making a face when he started making clicking and popping noises and then a farting noise with his mouth._

_Sam threw his hands up in the air. "Dude, seriously!"_

"_All right, I'm gonna go talk to Karen again—see if she knows anything about this Dana Shulps, okay?" Dean asked, getting up with his flashlight when I got off of his lap and going past me._

"_Great." Sam said, and went back to typing._

_I looked at Dean after taking the chair he had sat in. "I'll stay here, thanks—rather not go talk to Karen anymore, sorry."_

"_That's fine, Baby." Dean replied and then looked at Sam before heading out the door. "Keep going, Sparky."_

"_I'll join you," Kate said suddenly, pulling on her coat and smirking when she caught Sam watching her out of the corner of her eye. "Seems more exciting then sitting around here waiting to crack a passcode."_

_Dean smiled and nodded. "The more the merrier."_

"_Have fun!" I called after them, laughing and then turning to Sam. "You want my cousin—don't even deny it, you've been watching her all day."_

"_It's the shirt," Sam said defensively, blushing. "It's distracting."_

"_And incredibly flattering for her rack."_

"_My brother has rubbed off on you way too much…"_

xx

"Then Dean went back to Karen's place, to check up on her. I mean, you know, she'd been pretty upset earlier." Sam explained to the cop.

"So why didn't you go with him?" The woman asked.

Sam shrugged at her. "I just went back to the motel with Lana."

"I was feeling tired and a bit put out, and wanted the company." I told her.

"A little R&R?" She asked, but she was implying sex and I was annoyed.

I uncrossed my arms and leaned over the table a little. "For the umpteenth time, Sam and I are _not_ together. Stop."

"Did you miss the part about Sam and I wanting in each other's pants?" Kate asked her, giving her a look like she thought the cop was incredibly stupid.

"How did you know we were there, by the way?" Sam asked her, changing the subject before I slapped a bitch.

"We found the motel matchbook on your brother when we arrested him." She said in a voice much more annoyed than mine. "Now let's quit fooling around. You four were together the whole time you were in Baltimore. Why separate now? Because your brother went to go murder Karen."

"He didn't kill anyone." Sam said calmly.

She hit the table with her fist hard. "I heard the 911 call! Karen was terrified! She said someone was in the house!"

When Sam and I just shook our heads and looked at her, she ended up leaving—she knew we weren't going to tell her anything she could use to frame Dean for killing Karen and Tony when he didn't. So Sam, Kate and I took the time to try and figure out the 'Dana Shulps' thing before he turned to me.

"They always seem to think we're a couple." Sam told me with a laugh.

I smiled at him. "They certainly do—and lately they jump to us getting down and dirty."

"You know…it kind of annoys Dean." Sam explained slowly, shrugging a little.

"Well, maybe if he didn't turn his flirt on most of the time, then he wouldn't have to worry about people thinking I wasn't his girl. Besides, they like to walk in on you and me in slightly compromising positions—at least of course at first glance." I added, laughing a little. "I mean you kissing my forehead isn't compromising. I think he was hoping that having Kate around would make it look like I was his, but oh well—back to this 'Dana Shulps' thing. It might be an anagram." I said as Kate said, "anagram" with me.

Before we could deal with it, our lawyer came in and handed us a paper that Sam opened up and showed to me. Dana Schulps had to do with Ashland—a street in Baltimore that we needed to check out, went meant escaping, and acting with this whole Hilts and McQueen thing—Hilts was McQueen's character in "The Great Escape". That way Dean would know what was up and where we were, and Kate, Sam and I could be out there to dust this ghost and deal with busting Dean as soon as the job was finished.

"I hope that was helpful." The lawyer told us. "Now if you don't mind, I'd like to discuss your case now."

"Sure thing, Matlock." Sam said, motioning him a chair.

"You two really are brothers, aren't you?" He asked Sam with a laugh and Kate beamed at Sam and his playful attitude. "Now, as you know, the D.A. might be interested in—"

"—we need you in there—with the other one." The female cop told us.

I looked at Kate and Sam when the lawyer left the three of us alone and smiled at them. "Now's our chance…let's go."

xx

Once Kate, Sam and I got to the first motel listed in the yellow pages, and put the name under Jim Rockford—it's how Dean and Sam found each other when they were separated—Kate, Sam and I were immediately trying hard to figure it all out. He was rushing through some things and I suddenly felt like I needed to talk to Sam—I needed to let him know just how appreciative of him that I was because every time something big happened, Sam was always there for me. I mean even when the cops had busted in to get us earlier, Sam had made sure no one hurt Kate or me before he gave himself over to their custody.

"I want to thank you." I told him from across the room.

Sam looked up. "For what?"

"For always being here for me…for looking out for me…for loving me like a little sister." I told him with a smile. "It really does mean a lot to me."

"It means a lot to me too," Kate admitted with a smile from right next to me. "It's really nice to know that she's safe."

Sam smiled and stood up. "Lan, you don't have to thank me for any of that—I'm going to be here to protect you and love you forever. You have nothing to worry about Kate…Lan's my family."

I smiled a little more. "I just…you don't have to, but you do. Even when I come clean about one more thing I've kept from you guys, you always forgive me first, no matter how mad you are about it. How do you do that? How do you stick by me without thinking that I'm losing it?"

"Lan, I love you." Sam said with a shrug, and as he said that he placed his fingers under my chin, lifting my face up so our eyes met, and then he smiled. "I'm going to protect you no matter what happens, Lan. You're smart, you're beautiful, and Dean has no idea what it is that he's missing when he steps out of line but he loves you too, and you're part of our family—Dean and I are going to keep you safe."

I nodded and kissed his cheek, going over to one of the motel beds and going into research mode…but not without watching Kate and Sam out of the corner of my eye…

xx

**Kate's POV**

"Just when I think I have you all figured out, you surprise me, Winchester," I said as I reached past Sam and grabbed a beer from the fridge.

The whole time I made eye contact with him and we were both smiling and for a moment I thought about what it was that I should have done. Normally I would just go in for the kill, but he and Lana had just had a pseudo sibling moment and I didn't want to suddenly get all randy after it. I had little sisters to look after and the fact that Lana was so loved and accepted and protected kind of just made me _respect_ Sam more…even if I still kind of wanted to jump his bones.

"There's a lot about me that you don't know," he responded.

I nodded at that and popped open the beer I'd grabbed. "Yeah…I can see that. I'd like to get to know you though."

"You've been pretty much proving that the whole week, Kate," Sam told her with a smile on his face. "I'm not the reason you've stayed, am I?"

That was exactly the sign that I needed.

I smirked and set the beer bottle down, rolling up onto my tippy toes and kissing Sam flush on the mouth. At first I thought that maybe I was being too forward too soon because it felt like maybe Sam was resisting, but soon his lips were moving against mine, and just as he slipped his arms around my waist to pull me closer, something clicked in our brains and we pulled apart. It was more Sam than it was me that realized what was happening, but I admit, it felt a little awkward with Lana right there watching us.

"Lana…" Sam said slowly.

Lana waved her hand and kept looking at her research. "Don't mind me, I don't mind. Just warn me before the clothes start coming off so that I can hide in the bathroom."

"Very funny," Sam said, turning to look at the door as there was a knock on it.

Sam moved to answer it and I just nodded because I figured now was as good a time as ever to change the subject. That kiss had just been too wonderful and my stomach was doing flip flops and this was bad…this was getting too close to someone that did something that could kill them on a daily basis. For some reason, those feelings, were telling me that this could become so good that I wouldn't want to lose it and being a hunter was about loss.

Sad but true.

Lana looked up when I looked over toward the door, the female cop standing there and Sam and I exchanged glances as she looked at us, and then showed us her wrists—sporting the same bruises that Tony and Karen had on their wrists. Lana was standing up just like that, heading over to her to get a better look and being kind and gentle like Lana always was with everyone.

"They showed up after you saw it?" Lana asked her, looking at her wrists after Sam did.

She nodded at us. "I—I dunno, I guess."

"All right." Sam told her, looking directly at her. "You're gonna have to tell me exactly what you saw."

"You know, I must be losing my mind. You're fugitives. I should be arresting you." She told us and Lana, Sam and I sighed.

I took a couple steps towards her. "You know what, you can arrest us later…after you live through this."

Sam nodded in agreement. "Right now, you gotta talk to me, okay? Okay. Okay, great. Now the spirit, what did it look like?"

"She was uh, she was really, really pale, and her throat was cut…and she had these really deep, dark red eyes. It appeared like she was trying to talk to me, but she couldn't. There was a lot—a lot of blood." She told us, sitting down.

"You know what? Here." Sam said as Lana handed him the pictures she had been looking over. "We've been researching every girl who has either died or gone missing from Ashland Street."

She looked at them and then looked at us. "How did you get those? Those are from crime scenes and booking photos."

"You've got your job, and we've got ours." Sam said, organizing the pile. "Here, we need you to look through these. Tell us if you recognize anyone."

She took them and I bit my lips because I wanted to focus on this hunt, but at the same time I kept thinking about Sam's soft lips. I came to be with my cousin and get away from boring family life and helping Kat with school essays and then suddenly I'm meeting Lana and her boy toy, Dean, then Dean gets arrested and held for suspected murder, and has to deal with the shapeshifter stuff coming back to haunt him—he'd told me the story—and all I wanted to do was kiss Sam again.

I wanted to kiss him so bad...feel those arms around me…

"This one." She told us, holding up the photo.

"Claire Becker? 28 years old." Sam explained to her. "Disappeared about eight or nine months ago."

She nodded at him. "But I don't even know her. Why would she be coming after me?"

"Well, before her death she was arrested twice for dealing heroine." I told her, looking over the information about her. "You ever work narcotics?"

She nodded at me. "Yeah, Pete and I did, before homicide."

"You ever bust her?" Sam asked, holding up her picture again.

"Not that I remember." She replied truthfully.

"Says she was last seen entering 2911 Ashland Street. Police searched the place, didn't find anything." Sam read off.

Lana sighed and nodded. "So we need to check it out ourselves and see if we can find the body."

"What?" She asked, somewhat appalled.

"Well we gotta salt and burn her bones. It's the only way to put the spirit to rest." Sam replied, grabbing his coat as Lana grabbed hers and I grabbed mine.

"Of course it is." She said, and the three of us headed over to Ashland Street.

Sam and I started looking around going up the stairs in the warehouse, and her staying below looking around with Lana. In the pit of my stomach I knew that Sam and I shouldn't be left alone because of what I had done before, and when I opened my mouth to say something, Sam shook his head. At least he was trying to be professional, which was something I had been prided on, so I should stop too.

"Right…hunt…" I said with a nod.

He nodded. "Right…hunt…"

We both looked at each other for a moment, our eyes resting on each other's lips and then we looked away. The two of us had a job to do and we really needed to make the horn go away right now because Lana was right—we wanted each other. It was frustrating too because I'd never wanted a man this bad in my life…so I needed to run when this was done and just forget about him, even if that was easier said than done.

"Guys!" Lana called to us.

Sam and I headed right for them, Lana explaining that Claire had been there trying to reach out to them.

xx

**Lana's POV**

It was pretty obvious that Sam and Kate had been distracted, but right now we had a job to do and I had a boyfriend to get back. I wasn't very happy that Dean was still rotting away in the jail practically for things he hadn't done and I wanted this to be set right as soon as possible because we were pretty much patched up. I wanted to get his name cleared, take him to a motel and ravish him.

The female cop pointed. "She was over there, by the window."

As she and Sam went over to the window I stopped for a moment and used my flashlight to look around, Kate helping me. The fact that Claire's ghost hadn't attacked the woman made me think a little harder about what was going on here…what if…

"Maybe she's not vengeful at all." I said aloud to Sam.

Sam helped the cop move the thing in front of the window, and then we found the letters—and learned why there were extra ones. We were in the Ashland Supplies Warehouse, and as the shadows of the letters hit the back wall—Dana Shulps—we went over and began to break into it, after using the EMF detector, and then Sam seeing something down in there. When we pulled the body out of the wall, we knew it was Claire, and we had to look her over.

"She led us to her body because she's not a vengeful spirit." I explained and nodded as the woman put her wrists up against Claire's. "Her wrists—they'd be bruised like yours."

Sam looked at the necklace on the corpse. "That necklace mean something to you?"

"I've seen it before—it's rare. It was custom made over on Carson Street." She fished something out of her shirt. "I have one just like it—Pete gave it to me."

Kate nodded at the trinket. "It all makes sense now."

"What does?" She asked me.

"Yeah…you see Claire isn't a vengeful spirit at all. She's a death omen." Sam explained as I nodded.

The woman looked miffed. "Excuse me?"

"Claire isn't killing anyone—she's trying to warn them." Sam added with a nod. "You see sometimes spirits don't want vengeance, they want justice. That's why she led us here—she wants us to know who the killer is."

There was a long pause as Sam and Kate looked at each other before we all looked at the woman as she tried to piece it together. It wasn't long before I couldn't stop the words coming out of my mouth since Sam was still waiting a little to pry.

"How much do you know about your partner, Detective?" I asked her.

She looked like she had just figured something out. "Oh my God…"

"What?" Sam asked, wanting to get the information out of her now.

"A year ago, some heroine went missing from lock-up—obviously a cop. We never found out who did it, but whoever did it would need someone to fence their product." She explained as Sam and I got knowing looks on our faces.

Sam nodded at her. "Somebody, like a drug dealer…somebody like Claire."

Knowing that, we hurried and got into her car, and she called the office. We needed to figure out where Pete was, and we needed to finish this before someone else died—before the cop met her demise. Also, I wanted to know what was up with Dean, and I didn't like the look spreading across her face.

"All right, thanks." She said, hanging up.

Sam glanced at her. "What is it?"

"Pete just left the precinct…with Dean." She replied.

"What?" Sam and I asked angrily.

She nodded at him. "He said the prisoner had to be transferred, and he just took him. Dispatch has been calling, but he won't answer the radio."

"Radio? So he took a county vehicle?" Sam asked and Kate smiled.

"Yeah." She told him with a nod.

I smiled at Sam and he smiled back. "Then it should have a LoJack."

"You just gotta get it turned on." Sam added, reaching out and touching Kate's hair. "Don't worry, Lan…we'll get to them."

"We better," I responded, turning to the cop. "Or I'm junk punching your partner…hard."

I was a little jealous for a moment that Sam had touched Kate's hair instead of mine because it was our brother/sister bond there, but they were…they were getting closer. He liked her vulgar jokes and the way she loved her family and honestly I could see it. I could see how they meshed together and I hoped that Kate would give it a chance instead of running like she did with everything—especially now, after Cooper.

Focusing, we turned on the LoJack, getting to the place where Pete had taken Dean. I hurried out, getting to them before Sam and the Detective did, and she pointed her gun at them as we all kept our distance. More than anything right that minute, I wanted for Dean to most definitely _not_ get shot.

"Pete! Put the gun down!" She shouted to him.

"Diana? How'd you find me?" Pete asked her, and Dean looked up relieved, and yet confused.

Diana swallowed. "I know about Claire."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Pete replied to her.

"Put the gun down!" She said more forcefully.

"No, I don't think so." He told her. "You're fast, but I'm pretty sure I'm faster."

I really didn't like that a slightly mentally insane man was pointing a gun at Dean _and_ upset, and I really hoped he would stop. I wanted Diana to get through to him, but at the same time, I thought that maybe I could help…if I tapped into my powers. Would that be in Dean's best interest? Would I be fast enough to get that gun out of Pete's hands?

"Why are you doing this?" Diana asked Pete.

He smiled and rolled his eyes a little. "I didn't do anything, Diana."

"It's a little late for that." She told him.

"It wasn't my fault," he explained to her. "Claire was going to turn me in, I had no choice."

She nodded at him. "And Tony? Karen?"

"Same thing. Tony scrubbed the money, then he got skittish and then he wanted to come clean. I was sure he told Karen everything. It was a mess I had to clean it up." He admitted to her. "I panicked."

Dean looked at Kate, Sam and I who wanted to do something, but Dean shook his head—one wrong move and Pete could pull the trigger and we wouldn't have anymore Dean. I couldn't live without Dean, so I just nodded but started to say a spell under my breath so the gun wouldn't fire. If the gun didn't fire, then Dean was safe, and that was the most important thing to me right then.

"How many more people are going to die over this, Pete?" Diana asked him.

"There's a way out." He said, and looked at Dean. "This Dean kid is a friggin' gift. We can pin the whole thing on him. No trial. No nothing…just one more, dead, scumbag."

"Hey," Dean told him, but put his cuffed hands up a little as Pete waved the gun more in his face.

"No one will question it. Please? I still love you." He said, and she began to lower her gun. "Thank you. Thank you."

He was about to shoot Dean when Diana quickly shot him in the leg and Dean rolled out of the way and she went over to Pete. I hurried over to Dean and held my hand up to disorient Pete a little, looking Dean in the eye to see how he was—scared, but all right. Thank God that he was alright because if anything had happened to him, I wouldn't be able to live with myself.

"Then why don't you buy me another necklace, you ass?" She asked, and he lunged at her from the ground, knocking her down and scrambling for his gun.

He got up and began to limp, pointing his gun at Sam as he went to help me help Dean, Kate getting in a protective stance. Sam stopped and put his hands up in the air, Dean getting in front of me when Pete pointed the gun towards me and I smiled a little—Dean always protected me, even if it meant trying to gamble his own life for mine and I would do the same for him…every time.

"Don't do it! Don't do it!" He told us all, waving the gun around.

I began to mutter another spell when I stopped, Claire showing herself to all of us, and then Diana shooting Pete in the heart. He fell to the ground, and then she uncuffed Dean and we stood there as it began to get light out, and then she came over to us. She looked really upset, but that was to be expected—her boyfriend turned out to be a really, _really_ big jerk and we were still technically fugitives.

"You doing all right?" Sam asked her.

"Not really." She replied honestly. "The Death Omen, Claire…what happens to her now?"

I looked at her. "It should be over…she should be at rest."

"So, uh, what now Officer?" Dean asked her.

"Pete _did_ confess to me. He screwed up your cases royally. I figure there's a good chance I can get your cases dismissed." She said to us.

We all smiled at her and I really genuinely liked her—even though she had annoyed me before. She understood what it was that we did and she was willing to help us to get to continue to do what we did best…help the innocent. So even though she had insinuated things that made me upset with her, it wasn't entirely her fault given the information that she had.

"You could take care of that for us?" Sam asked her happily.

"I hope so…but the St. Louis murder charges?" She shook her head. "That's another story. I—I can't help you…unless I just happened to turn my back and you four walked away. I could tell them that the suspects escaped."

Kate looked at her. "Wait, are you sure?"

"Yeah, she's sure, Kate." Dean told her, hopeful.

"No, it's just you could lose your job over something like that." Sam continued for Kate since they were on the same page, as Dean just smiled and shook his head, just caring about getting out of here.

"Look, I just want you guys out there doing what you guys do best. Trust me I'll sleep better at night." She replied with a smile. "Listen, you need to watch your back. They're going to be looking for the four of you right now. Get out of here. I gotta radio this in."

We began to walk when the one question I had been waiting for came up—Dean and his car…I loved him so much.

"Hey, uh, you wouldn't happen to know where my car is by any chance?" Dean asked her.

"It's at the Impound yard on Robertson. Why?" She asked and we gave her different looks. "Don't…even think about it."

Sam smiled at her. "It's okay. It's all right. Don't worry. We'll just uh, we'll improvise. We're pretty good at that."

"Yeah, I've noticed," she smiled and then she reached into her pocket and pulled out my promise ring. "I, uh…I thought you might like this back."

I smiled at her, and put the ring on my left ring finger. "Thank you."

She nodded and then we all waved at each other and the boys and I began to walk. We needed to get the Impala out of the impound and then get to the motel and get all of our stuff. After that we could move on, and I could figure out what was going on with Kate and Sam…see if she was going to run.

"Nice lady." Sam said, trying to make small talk.

Dean shrugged at him. "Yeah, for a cop. She look familiar to you?"

"No, why?" Sam asked him with a smile on his face.

"I don't know…nothing. Hey, you guys hungry?" Dean asked us.

"No, why?" Sam laughed as Kate went, "I could go for some grub."

"For some reason I could really go for some pea soup." Dean replied with a shrug.

I smiled at my man's appetite and pulled on his arm gently. He smiled and paused a moment, letting me roll up onto the balls of my feet and kiss him gently. It was tender and slow and I was so happy about it, moaning into him a little and laughing when Kate said something perverted that just made Sam laugh.

"I am never letting you run off by yourself again," I warned him.

Dean chuckled and kissed me again. "I think I know a way that I can make it up to you, Lanni…"

**Note: Anyone else notice that the chick who was protective of the boys with the tat on her behind in Chuck's premiere eppy was the SAME actress who played Karen in this one? When I saw her again in Season Four I was all, "It's Karen!" She was fun in both rolls. Anyway, in _this_ story, the next chapter is shorter, and it has lots of flirting and a special surprise in it! Hope you like it! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	8. A Bittersweet Surprise

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This chapter is kind of a filler, and yet it's very important so pay attention and you won't have as many questions (also keep in mind that when I originally wrote this chapter way back in 2006, I had already wanted there to be Hellhounds before SPN had given us any…then I got them so I've changed things a tiny bit).**

**There are also several POV shifts, I hope you all enjoy and a sex warning.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Lana's POV**

Dean and I were giggling a bit in the back of the Impala, both of us trying to cash in on quite a bit. We were finally looking like we were back on track and I wanted more than anything to just be one hundred percent patched up with him so that I could come clean about the demon thing. The two of us had gone out to get some things done and ended up in the back seat taking off each other's clothes, me on top.

"We should be parked somewhere else…" I told him, my cheeks flushing.

Dean chuckled and cupped my face. "That cute flushing thing you do when you're embarrassed? It's a giant turn on."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Shut up, you're just horny."

"Yeah, but it's your fault," Dean said as he got his pants off and brought my naked body flush against his. "It's always your fault…"

With that, he pressed his lips to mine and a passionate kiss developed between the two of, me feeling Dean rubbing himself a bit between my legs, which made me gasp and moan. The man knew exactly how to turn me on and honestly it was going to be the death of me someday because he was so damn hard to resist. I admit that I had purposefully dressed up for him and gotten all sexy in a very tasteful way, but this was just…

"You're a tease…" I said slowly.

So to punish him for that, I bit his jaw lovingly, Dean grunting in a pleased fashion and nodding at me to continue. I began to kiss and bite him jaw line, moving to his neck and his pecks as he writhed underneath me, making me feel powerful and sexy, which I didn't always feel. In fact, I'd been feeling a bit like a second choice with all the flirting lately and right now it felt nice to know that it was _me_ that was making Dean's body react like this…turning him on like this.

"God…" Dean gasped out when I bit just a little harder than I had before, tracing my tongue along the indentation. "I certainly didn't teach you that."

I smiled and shook my head. "That was all me."

"It better leave a mark."

"Baby, it's like a Lana Meckenzie brand."

He smiled, lust in his eyes as he pulled me in for a passionate kiss, hands going to my hips to lift me up a bit and bring me flush down on him. I cried out as I felt his flesh push into mine, both of us revved up and playful and in need of this kind of time together after everything that we had been through. Me losing the baby, us fighting, him almost getting shot for things he didn't do—needless to say that we really needed this.

No more words were needed, but we certainly were full of them bantering and letting our mouths and hands roam as we moved together on the backseat. Nothing felt better than having Dean's naked flesh running along mine and it warmed my heart when he paid such special attention to me and made me topple over first and then lost himself inside of me just moments after as I rode out the climax. He certainly could…wasn't like I was ever getting pregnant again.

"I love you…" I whispered, kissing him before he could do anything about it.

Most women would be really upset that their boyfriend never said 'I love you' back and while sometimes I was, I understood it. He had gone for so long keeping his feelings to himself and he had convinced himself such a long time ago that he wasn't allowed to get attached to people because it put them in danger and he couldn't lost them. Besides, I knew how he felt about me before John died and right now his walls were still up…but I knew that he loved me too and right now, knowing was enough.

"I don't know why," Dean said as I pulled back a little, both of us trying to catch our breaths.

I smiled and kissed his nose. "I don't know how I couldn't."

He nodded slowly and smiled a little, kissing me gently. "Shoulda brought a condom."

"Dunno why—not like we need one, what with part of my uterus missing, remember?" I asked, trying to laugh a little and turn it into a joke.

Dean saw what I was doing though, kissing me with a sad smile on his face and slowly slipping out of me, holding me to him. He and I were bonded and no one was ever going to be able to break that bond, no matter what they tried to do. Maybe it was dangerous and maybe we both wanted more than we were willing to admit, but as we lay there with our bodies pressed together, holding onto each other, we both felt at peace…I knew it.

"Remember when you asked me how my heart was?" Dean asked me suddenly, his fingers gently gliding through my hair as he held me on the backseat, both of us on our sides not breaking eye contact.

I smiled and nodded. "How can I forget? I was afraid I was going to send you into cardiac arrest."

Dean chuckled and kissed my nose affectionately. "When I said that it was fine, I didn't just mean that I wasn't having a heart attack."

It seemed that post sex when we were both feeling a little vulnerable was the only time we ever even got in the realm of 'sappy'.

"Baby, I know that," I told him, resting my hand on the nape of his neck and stroking his skin with my thumb. "Don't feel like you have to say anything to me, okay? I know how you feel about me and I'm flattered that you've let me get this close."

"But you shouldn't feel 'flattered', Lanni—you should feel loved." Dean said without skipping a beat, running his fingertips along my damp skin. "I suck at emotions."

I smiled and pressed my body closer to his. "You know what? I have enough emotions for the both of us."

xx

**Kate's POV**

The thing about trying to escape myself is that I was starting to get attached with Sam the next week that I spent with him, so I had made up my mind: after we visited Jen, I was heading back to Kalli, Kat and my parents. I wasn't ready to be this attached to a guy again, especially because the last guy that I had been attached to had been so incredibly terrible to me in the end and I might have tried to do something I would have regretted forever.

"_Perhaps you need to try a little harder…" I told Cooper that night, tears streaming down my face._

_I rarely ever cried—in fact there were only a small handful of people that had ever heard or seen me do that. Normally I had it together and I could go about things in a professional manner but not this time…not when there was so much at stake here. My heart was a much more fragile thing than I had ever thought it was and right now I wanted more than anything to just not have one._

"_I think you're taking this way out of context, Kitty," he said slowly, shrugging his shoulders. "Everything is fine."_

"_Everything is **not** fine!" I told him, raising my voice. "You were with her, putting your clothes back on! How dare you? Kat saw you!"_

_Cooper shrugged a little bit. "Kat sees a lot of things. God, Kitty, we're hunters. Why are you turning this into—"_

"—_into something more than that? Because you told me that you loved me." I reminded him, wiping the tears away and shaking my head. "Well, what can I expect from a man that lies for a living, right?"_

It hadn't been one of my shining moments and I hated that I had ever let feelings get in the way of my job, but Lana had pointed out to me that it was bound to happen someday. Feelings were just as much a part of the job as the con artist part and the needing to be good at researching and using weapons. Still…the one time that I had decided to lay it all out there instead of just being in it for a good time and he had cheated and then acted like I was making a big deal out of nothing—never again.

Not that Sam Winchester was the same.

_Nothing_ about Sam Winchester was the same.

In fact, Sam seemed like the only actually decent man that I had ever met in my life. He cared so much about the victims and their families and it almost seemed like he was hunting to avenge them and not just hunting to try and kill the bastards responsible. I understood that, and I respected it because I had always been the one that was in it to get a rush and kill something that needed to be stopped…but Sam was just more noble than that…

"You've been a bit…avoidy…" Sam said with a smile on his face.

I looked up from not actually reading my book and smiled back. "No, I've just been thinking a lot."

"You don't have to feel like you have to stay, Kate," Sam told me, sitting down on the side of the motel bed. "I enjoyed the kiss—Hell, I'd gladly kiss you again—but I would never make you do something you didn't want."

Great…he was also chivalrous in a world where chivalry was dead.

"Can we rain check on that?" I found myself asking him, too upset with the idea of letting him slip away even though I wasn't ready to be serious. "Jen has a problem she needs help with and we need to find the lovebirds."

"Of course," Sam responded, stroking my hair.

His touch sent shivers down my spine and I smiled a little more, getting up slowly and getting my coat on, pocketed my cell phone. Sam followed suit and then as we stood there by the door, I went for it. Not once had I been expecting to just jump the poor guy, but my lips were crashing into his and his were crashing into mine. Then we started taking off our coats and I decided to abandon all reason.

"We shouldn't when you're conflicted," Sam managed as I pulled him down onto the motel bed, definitely hesitating.

I sucked on his bottom lip a moment. "I'm not conflicted…I want this…"

Okay, maybe I was a bit conflicted, but that was also true—I wanted this. So I took off my shirt and I smiled as he kissed me, both of us taking off our clothes, slowly but surely. Jen had texted me with a problem and I needed to bring it to Lana and Dean's attention, but right now I had Sam's hands on me and when we paused again, I found myself started to care more about him than myself. Curse this.

"I…Kate, I haven't done this since Jess…" Sam said suddenly.

So _that_ had been why he had been hesitating? He was still being true to his dead ex-girlfriend and it was then that I _really_ began to feel like the worst person in the history of the world. He was this incredibly _good_ person and I was not. Sam Winchester had a heart and he had morals and here I was just acting on my carnal desires and I found myself stroking his hair as we lay there in the buff, kissing him tenderly and pulling back to look him in the eye.

"I don't deserve you, I really don't," I said gently, stroking his cheek. "How about we rain check this too until we're both ready?"

xx

**Sam's POV**

I had been trying to figure out what to say to Kate when she yet again offered me a rain check, when Lana and Dean opened up the motel room door to see Kate and I naked in bed together. It wasn't like we were having sex, but while Dean started to say, 'wait to go, Sammy!', Lana had her hand up covering her eyes and could obviously hear Kate and I rushing to be covered, sitting up in the bed. We hadn't been expecting them, and they hadn't been expecting to walk in on them.

"You should have put a sock on the door…we'll go back out." Dean told us.

Kate laughed. "No need. I was going to get up anyway."

"Really? No one's even sweating…" Dean said as Lana lowered her hand from her face to hit him in the arm. "What?"

"Go grab my book from the passenger seat," Lana told him, leaning up and kissing him gently. "Now."

Dean sighed and kissed her back. "Fine—but only because I want to."

Lana nodded and stayed looking at the door, motioning to Kate and I to change and hearing the rustle of clothes. We were thankful she had sent Dean out and yet Lana seemed to be rather contemplative and I had a feeling that I knew why she seemed confused: Kate. Was Kate going to stay then? Because like Lana, I had been under the impression that she was most definitely going to be leaving and not be a permanent part of the team…maybe we were rushing things, Kate and I.

"Sorry we interrupted," Lana told us slowly.

Kate laughed a little. "You can turn around Lan—we're clothed."

Lana turned around and smiled a little at me fixing the bed. "So…"

"We had actually just decided that it wasn't the right time. I'm going to go and see if Dean wants to grab us all some dinner with me—I know, I know. Facing his remarks he thinks are witty, right?" Kate said, kissing me and then going past Lana out the door.

That left Lana and I alone together and by the look on her face, she wanted to talk to me about what was going on. I was alright with that and I chuckled a little when she started off in a rush—that was so typical of her. She treated me like the big brother that she never had and she obviously had quite a lot to say.

"Is she staying?" Lana asked me. "Because I am all on board the Kate/Sam love train, but I'm worried about both of you. You haven't slept with anyone since Jessica and Kate has never really given her whole heart away—at least without it getting broken. I know that you want to settle down someday and have a family and a real life but…she's never really wanted that. The two of you could be really good together, but you have to be willing to try."

I smiled and pat the end of the bed as I sat down. "Come here, Lan."

"Only if you promise you're not asking me to sit on the end of the bed you just had sex in…"

"There was no sex."

We both laughed and she nodded, sitting down next to me and letting me take her hands in mine. She worried so much about Dean and I, and I was so lucky to have her in my life—Dean was lucky to have her in his life. This young woman would do anything for him…_anything_…and the fact that she cared so much about us warmed my heart.

"You're right…it's been a while since Jessica. I thought she was the one for me, you know?" I told her, shrugging my shoulders a little. "She was ripped away from me and it hurt and there's a hole in my heart that only she can fill, but Kate. Kate's one of a kind, Lan. We've been talking about hunting and family and college and I know that our priorities right now are different and that she's been hurt, but I also know that she makes me feel good. I promise my intentions are honorable."

Lana laughed and nodded. "Of course _yours_ are, but what about hers?" She smiled though, because she was mostly joking. "I just worry about both of you because you've got broken hearts and I don't want you two to break each other's."

"Right now we're just getting to know each other," I reminded her, kissing her head. "The moment I fall in love with her, she'll be the first to know."

"I had better be the second," she said, pulling back to look at me, 90% serious. "I love your brother and I know that you love your brother, but I want to be second."

"I'll tell you before Dean, I promise." I told her laughing.

She smiled and nodded. "Good…you do know that you said 'when', right?"

xx

**Dean's POV**

"So…you and Sammy, huh?" I asked Kate as we drove to a nearby diner.

She had come out wanting to get some dinner and Lana and I had certainly worked up an appetite while we were out before. Just remembering our little backseat tryst made me smile a giant smile that Kate thought was meant for teasing her with. Yeah, I wanted to know about the woman trying to get with my brother, but for a moment I had been distracted because of the pleasant swell of my heart that Lana gave me. Wait…that meant I was _way_ too close to her.

"This place reeks of sex," Kate told me.

I laughed a little and nodded. "Lana and I got…distracted…"

"Right…_distracted_…" Kate responded, laughing a little and opening up the glove box. "Unused condom too—she really can't have kids, can she?"

"No…she can't." I said and Kate noticed that tone in my voice.

Honestly, if you had asked me months ago if I wanted a kid, I would have told you that you were out of your friggin' mind. I mean, I still didn't really _want _a kid, but if I ever did, I would want them with Lana and I was willing to admit that, I just…I knew that I would end up like my father. I was a hunter and kids just weren't in the cards for me and that was alright…as long as I had Lana, my future was brighter already, regardless of how bloody my demise might be.

"You know, someday you two can try adop—"

"—I'd rather talk about you screwing my brother."

"I'm not screwing your brother."

Kate and I both looked at each other and then at the road, me nodding a bit and trying to get us back on track. I already kind of liked Kate and she was snarky like I figured all of the Meckenzie women were, but I didn't want to talk about it. I barely talked about it with Lana, I sure as Hell wasn't going to talk about it with her cousin that I had only know for two weeks.

"You were just naked wrestling?" I asked her.

Kate laughed and looked at me as we parked. "We were going to have sex, but I'm getting too attached and he's still worried he's disgracing Jess' memory. He's one of the best men that I've met and I'm not good enough for him. So…we're not sleeping together and we probably never will because I have to go back to my sisters."

"Lana told me you were a runner, but she also told me what happened with this Custer, guy."

"Cooper."

"This Cooper guy…men are scum. Hell, I know this cause I'm scum. If we ran every time someone better than us was interested though, we'd never learn." I explained to her, looking her way. "Look, I don't think you're a terrible person, Kate. My brother is into you and you're into him and I don't want you to run because you think he's larger than life. Give him a chance."

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Wait a minute…she told you that Jen needed something?" I asked Sam, grabbing out my phone and realizing I had three texts from Jen. "Wow…it must be serious because she's been texting me like crazy. Um, we need to get back to Lawrence—or at least I need to."

Sam laughed a little bit. "Like Dean'll ever let you go anywhere by yourself ever again."

"We'll see," I said with a smile on my face. "I'm going to call Jen, you just uh…send Dean into the bathroom when he gets in."

"You two are insatiable—don't think I don't know what you two did when you were out." Sam told me, shaking his head and grabbing his laptop. "You're hair looks good, but it's obviously disheveled for a reason."

"Just send your brother in so I can talk to him." I responded, rolling my eyes.

Sam nodded and I called Jen as I headed to the bathroom, Jen wanting me to come and see her and so since she didn't want to explain over the phone, I got into the shower and as I was finishing up, Dean came into the bathroom. He was being loud and he obviously thought that I had invited him in for some shower sex because he took his clothes off and got into the shower with me.

"Jen needs us?" Dean asked, kissing me under the running water. "You're also showering without me—big 'no-no'."

"I needed a shower," I said laughing. "Though I suppose," I said slowly, running my fingertips along his skin, "you needed one too."

Dean smiled and kissed me passionately. "After this, we go see Jen."

"Hey…we promised no loud shower sex," I reminded him, pulling away a little.

"Quiet, shower sex then…" he responded, hoisting my body up and pinning me to the shower wall.

"Right…us, quiet…"

"Humor me…"

xx

"No, it was loud…" Kate said as I tried to focus on my laptop, my cheeks flushed. "Sam and I heard you—you have a dirty mouth, Dean. I hope Lana washed it out with soap."

I sighed loudly as Sam and Dean laughed—for completely different reasons. "I told him we weren't supposed to."

"But you caved damn quick," Dean reminded me.

"God, I know," I said, hiding my face in my hands in the backseat.

We were headed to Kansas to help out Jen and Sam and Kate hadn't let Dean or I hear the end of it. Yeah, I knew that I had caved, but he was right there and I was still turned on from the back of the car and when he started to point out that there was still a slight indent from my bite and how much he liked it, I just kind of wanted it…bad. Ugh. So now we were supposed to be focused and I had to go and do a hunt.

"Now, how are Sam and I supposed to think about sex, you guys, if all we can do is hear you guys going at it?" Kate teased again.

Sam nodded, encouraging her. "Yeah, it seems to me like you guys are cock blocking us…I'm just saying."

"Biggest cock block of all?" Dean said as he looked at Sam and then Kate. "Kate leaving to go and look after her sisters for a bit."

"I know Katie has to go," Sam replied, looking back at Kate and smiling. "I'm glad she cares about her family so much."

"Thank you, Sammy," she told him with a smile on her face.

Just like that…they were at nicknames.

I smiled a bit to myself and then called Jen to let her know that we were near and when we got there, I was the first inside. It was Hellhounds. I don't mean like the normal ones either…I mean like the kind that got away and were running rogue. Most of my research was telling me that it was rare for a Hellhound to go round…even more rare for it to be _not_ invisible—but anything could happen.

"Silver—it's the only thing I can find that's mentioned in the majority of lores about them. Others talk about vampires killing them." I said with a sigh.

"Look, I'll go to the library around here, and then you three can check up on Kevin and then talk to Jen about what she has—that girl always has everything." Dean told us.

I nodded and kissed him gently as he dropped us off at Jen's. "I'm looking forward to having you all to myself tonight."

"I hope sooner rather than later," Dean said as he moaned slightly as I nipped at his bottom lips with my teeth. "You do not play fair, Woman."

"I learned from the best," I responded with a wink, kissing him tenderly before Kate, Sam and I headed to Jen.

"There you guys are," Kevin said when he answered the door. "Long time no see, Kate."

I smiled at him and watched him and Kate hug, Sam knowing already that we all had history together. So we congregated in the living room, Jen coming in with a giant grin on her face and I knew part of what she had wanted to tell me before she told me. She had a baby bump, just a small one on her midsection and it made me start to squeal: my little Jenny was pregnant.

"You're pregnant!" I exclaimed, hurrying to her.

Jen and I hugged and she laughed. "Yeah, and you'll never guess with what."

"Oh my God…" I said, pulling back a little and placing my hand on her stomach. "He put twins in there?"

"Why is this my fault?" Kevin asked laughing.

"Because you're the shooter, she's just the carrier," Kate responded, laughing when Sam laughed and Kevin rolled his eyes.

Sam smiled at Jen as she nodded about the twins thing. "How is it?"

xx

**Jen's POV**

Part of me had been incredibly worried about springing all of this on Lana, what with her miscarriage and not being able to have kids and everything, but I was excited. I wasn't excited about it being twins, but Kevin and I had wanted this and I wanted more than anything to share it with Lana. We shared everything together and I loved that even Sam seemed happy about it and it was nice to know that they still thought about the normal things in life…even if they were _also _here for a case.

"How is what? Having to pee every ten minutes? Having ankles swell and know that someday they'll be so large you can't define them from your feet? Knowing that my stomach is going to get so big that I can't look over it? It's great, I have to tell you." I teased, smiling at Sam.

Lana nodded and hugged me again. "Having the back pains, the morning sickness, and the food and sex cravings—it's a blast, Sammy."

Sam chuckled embarrassedly. "It was the wrong question to ask. How far along are you now?"

"11 weeks," I smiled and rested my hands on my stomach. "It's really surreal…knowing there's two little babies in here."

"But it feels amazing, doesn't it?" Lana asked me, smiling sadly know. "Wow…twins. Can I steal one?"

"I want both of them," Kevin told her, which made her laugh. "You're Godmother though."

Lana sent him a look. "Like I wouldn't be."

We all shared a laugh and then I decided to get down to business because Lana was upset and I didn't want her to be. I wanted her to share in my news—and she was and she was genuinely happy for me, she just wished she was _still _pregnant—but it was important that we get this hunt done. Besides, there was no one I trusted more than Lana to get things done and save people…no one but Kate and the boys.

"You going to find out what they are?" Lana asked me before I could change the subject.

I smiled at her. "I don't want to know what they are."

"Does Kevin?" Sam asked me, obviously wanting to know too.

Jen shook her head. "The whole idea is the element of surprise."

Lana nodded at me and I knew she was dwelling on the fact that she had never gotten to know whether she was having a boy or a girl so it was time to change the subject…

"Let's not talk about this anymore. How about we go ahead and we talk about this whole Hellhound thing?" I told them.

Lana nodded at me. "Right…you told me that its mauled two people already—how do you know it was specifically Hellhounds besides the obvious?"

"The obvious?" Sam asked.

"Jen's research," Kate responded, knowing me well.

"The people that it mauled were the people that thought that they had them under control. Now that the bind is broken, they're visible and everything…and they'll hunt again. All that anger at being controlled in the first place." I explained, shrugging my shoulders. "Kevin wanted to run off, but he doesn't have the experience and I can't—not in my new condition."

"I came up with silver." Lana told me, putting her hands on her hips, meaning business.

"I think our best option is to nail them through their body with a large silver rod, and then burn them." I agreed with her, smiling.

Lana smiled back. "All right, then it's time to trap the little buggers."

xx

**Kate's POV**

"Illegal use of hands! Illegal use of hands!" I cried, giggling as Sam's hand went up my shirt and the other one tickled my sides. "Sammy! We're supposed to be setting up a trap! Stop! Stop!"

Sam shushed me by placing his hand over my mouth and I stopped squirming, smiling a little. We were supposed to be setting a trap for the Hellhounds, but I had made an extremely suggestive statement and now he felt the need to punish me. It was kind of eating away at me that I was leaving after this hunt, but then I told myself that I could always come back and maybe time _away _from Sam would help me to clear my head a bit.

"What about the trap?" I whispered as his hand left my mouth, biting my lip when his fingertips ran along my bare skin as he pulled his other hand away from me to stop touching me.

Sam blushed a little and smiled. "I set it up, Katie—you shouldn't have said what you said though."

"I'll be right down with the album!" Kevin called, and walked right into the room and Sam and I looked up awkwardly.

"Hello," I told him with an awkward smile, Sam getting off of me.

"What the Hell are you doing?" Kevin demanded in a hushed voice, shutting the bedroom door behind him.

I laughed awkwardly and straightened my shirt. "We were setting up the trap?"

"In Jen's and my room with the door open?" Kevin asked me.

I looked at him, my mouth agape. "She _told_ you?"

"Told him what?" Sam asked, genuinely confused.

"About liking you once," Kevin replied before I could, "and I don't want you two to hurt her, so stay away from each other, okay? I am secure in the fact that she loves me, but I just…she had rebound feelings for you, Sam, and she could still get upset."

The way he said it was so sad and caring, and I felt bad for him—he knew that while he was gone, Jen had crushed on somebody else, and still was kind of attracted to him, but devoted to Kevin no matter what. Before anyone could say anything else, there was a growl outside, and so Sam hurriedly started to pour salt around us in a circle, and Kevin hurried to Jen. He was going to protect his wife no matter what, and I was suddenly feeling even _worse_ about myself and the decisions I was making right now…I was in _way_ over my head.

"All right, so now I need to do a little spell, and then we can actually go fight them." I told Sam.

"You and Lan…what if this spell thing is bad? What if it can get you killed?" Sam asked, resting his hand on my hip as I turned to him.

I smiled at him. "You don't have to worry about me, Sammy. Just…if I can mask us from them, then we have a better chance."

"But we don't _have_ to be invisible. We've all handled much worse." Sam replied and then took his hands away from me when he realized what he was doing and I smirked at him which made him point at me. "That won't make me do what you want."

"It won't?" I asked, and then sighed and stepped a little closer to him. "Really? My cuteness gets me nothing?"

Sam nodded at me. "Your cuteness gets you nothing."

I winked at him and then realized our bodies were touching and I was going to say another witty, flirty thing to him but we heard someone clear their throat. We stepped apart hurriedly and saw Jen, who honestly didn't look as upset as Kevin was making it seem like she would be. Rebound feelings or not, Jen looked happy that everyone else was happy and that was the icing on the cake—Sam looked _happy_ to her and I was taking off like a coward.

"It's time we let them in." She said as she nodded. "Be careful with each other, please? You've both been through a lot and I'd like it if you could both get through a lot more, so focus and then be good to each other."

"I think you're right." Sam said, and it was apparent that he knew the look too. "Let's let them in—you get safe, Jen."

Before we could say anything else, Jen left the room and a big snarling beast showed up at the window. I was a little startled, but I could hold my own and so I started to mutter a spell as I cocked my gun—I figured bullets could stun it—but I was stopped by a scream. Please, God, no…

"Sam!" Dean called after the piercing scream sounded.

I hurried out of the room and saw Dean standing over Jen, who was passed out and bloody, gashes in her abdomen, Lana trying to heal her. I had no words, even though Sam and Kevin both started talking about how we had to get her to the hospital, and I just prayed that they were all right…I just prayed that my actions hadn't distracted Jen enough for this to happen…while she was _pregnant_. Lana was never going to forgive me for this…

xx

**Lana's POV**

It had been a few hours since we had gotten Jen to the hospital, and Dean was holding my hand as Sam and Kate got me coffee and Kevin hadn't stopped pacing. We all wanted to see her—we all wanted to know what was going on with her and with the babies right now. I was freaking out and hadn't stopped the tears because I couldn't, and Kevin was crying too, but wouldn't let anyone near him because it was his _wife_ and his _children_ that were in trouble and he didn't want anyone to distract him from his prayers—he wanted them to be safe and so did I.

"Brings back memories…doesn't it?" Dean asked slowly.

I nodded as I wiped my eyes. "If she's having any of the same feelings I did, she's so scared. I wish I could be in there with her to hold her hand and let her know I was here. Why couldn't I heal her in time?"

"What are you talking about?" Dean asked.

I just shook my head as Sam and Kate came back with my coffee and sat on the other side of me, Kate kissing the top of my head. She and Sam really wanted things to go back to normal like I did, but it just seemed like I had to go and open up my big mouth. Now I couldn't even stop.

"This was my fault…" I told them.

Kate scoffed a little, shaking her head. "If anything, it was mine and Sam's. He and I keep flirting at the worst possible moments and while she was trying to make sure that _we _were going to stay focused, she lost focus and it could have cost her everything."

"But I couldn't heal her, Kate…because I never practice it, I failed her." I responded, tears in my eyes. "What if she loses the babies because I haven't embraced who I am?"

"I am so lost…" Dean told me.

My entire family knew that I was half demon—it was something that Florence had trusted her sisters with the knowledge of and Allison Newman was formerly Allison Meckenzie. She had made sure that her daughters understood that there was black and white and grey to everything and I had been so thankful to her. Now it looked like I was going to have to explain that to Dean…God, how I didn't want to.

"My biological father could heal," I tried to explain. "Don't ask me how, just know that my mother told me that and I got that ability. It scares me though, so like my powers, I only used them when I had to instead of practicing them."

"Your biological father that you just suddenly know information about?" Dean asked me, slowly taking his hand away.

I tried to reach over to take it back. "Dean…"

"No…it's fine." Dean replied, putting on a brave face.

"I need something to eat." Sam said abruptly, getting up so he didn't have to deal with me or his brother right then.

As he left, Dean looked over at Kevin and refused to look at me, and so I set the coffee down and sighed, resting my hand on my stomach. My miscarriage still haunted me, and I did _not_ want the same for Kevin and Jen…that would just be too horrible to bear. It wouldn't be right—Jen deserved so much more than that and I couldn't help but feel like I really needed my mother…I needed her to teach me how to embrace what I was so that I would never again feel this helpless.

Dean sighed and put his hand on mine, and I looked up at him, smiling sadly and then nodding at him. I knew he was hurting because he knew that I knew _something _more that I wasn't telling him, but he loved me. He was so mad that I still had secrets from him, but at the same time he knew that there were things that I didn't know about his parents and he knew that I was upset and wanted to be there for me…I appreciated that, even if I didn't deserve it.

"I still think about what it might have been like." Dean told me, obviously not wanting to talk about Sam.

I felt more tears come and I nodded, trying not to think about it. "You know, when I was shot, and I went through that trial…it really did give me hope that someday you and I would have a family, and then I found out that was what you wanted, and now I can't give you that. Now Jen's pregnant and she and I were going to raise our kids together but that's never going to happen and I just…I need her and the babies to be alright."

Dean nodded and put his forehead against mine, wiping the tears away with his thumbs before he kissed me. The kiss was so sweet and it was so tender, and I knew that there was no way that I could keep going on like this. Dean _needed_ to know, and _I_ needed to be the one to explain myself to him. It didn't really feel like the time or the place, but the conversation was presenting itself and I really couldn't afford to pass it up.

"Lanni, you've already given me that—_you _are my family." Dean explained to me.

I nodded at him. "Yeah, but, uh…Dean, I need to talk to you about something else, okay? Something important. I was _really _hurt about the waitress, which is why you and I have been kind of limping along even though we've been better, and mostly I've been hurting because I want to give you what you want…but that's not an excuse."

"Lanni…" Dean began, but trailed off when I shook my head.

I swallowed. "Dean, I love you—I _really _do—I just think that you deserve better than me and I—"

"Jennifer is going to be just fine." The doctor said suddenly.

Dean kissed me softly and then we pulled away and I wiped off my face as Kevin asked what we all wanted to know.

"And how are the twins?" He asked the doctor hurriedly.

The doctor nodded as well all went up to him, Sam included as he had just come back, and we waited anxiously for her reply. She didn't look like she was going to deliver us any bad news, but at the same time we were all just anxious and wanted her to spit it out already and tell us what we wanted to know.

"They're both safe and sound…she's very lucky—I thought for sure going in that I was going to have to deliver you the worst news, but…everyone's healthy." The doctor replied with a nod. "It's a miracle."

We were all so happy and relieved that we started to cry, Kevin and I most, actually hugging each other. Kate told me that obviously I had done something right trying to heal her, and that made me smile because it was what I wanted—Jen to be safe and sound and the babies to be alright. The doctor let us in to see her, and she gave us a weak smile, glad that we were there with her and I was the second one to her side…just guess who was first.

"We still have babies in here." Jen told Kevin, resting her hands on her stomach as he hurried over to her side. "They're small and I feel a bit weak, but they're all right."

"How are _you_?" Kevin asked her, kissing her head.

Jen shrugged weakly. "I'm pretty okay. My stomach hurts like nothing else, but I'm really fine."

I went over to her other side and I held her other hand. "Hey there! You're still going to be a mommy!"

"I am." She told me happily.

"Good, because Lana has been freaking out that she couldn't heal you," Kate said, smiling at her. "Maybe she didn't completely, but I think she was a big part in it."

"I know she was," Jen responded, kissing my hand and then looking up at Sam and Dean. "Do you have anything to say?"

Dean smiled a little. "I'm just glad you're all right, Jen."

"Thank you." She replied and then smiled at Sam. "Thank you guys all for being here for me, I'm not a baby though. So…what about the Hellhounds?"

"The four of us are going to take care of them." I assured her.

xx

"That stupid mutt bit me!" Dean said as I wrapped his arm up.

I nodded at him. "At least we have him cornered by salt for now. Where did Sam go?"

"He's calling Kevin to make sure that Jen is sure this silver and burning thing will work." Dean explained, looking around. "Kate went to get her spell book to hide the bodies."

I nodded, and then the two of us stepped out of the ring of salt and instantly heard growling. It was kind of a stupid thing to step out of the ring of salt when it was the only thing protecting us right then, but it felt like our only option. We had to lure the beast to us, and this was the only way that I could think of to do it.

"Get on in the ring, Lanni." Dean commanded, and I honestly thought it was kind of hot.

I shook my head though. "Like Hell I'm getting in the ring of salt while you go out there to get hurt again—fat chance."

"Lanni…I've been thinking about what Jen said, and I want you to keep yourself safe." He told me, stroking my hair.

"As much as I love that you care, you know me and I'm stubborn, and I'm going to help you." I told him, smiling at him cheekily.

As I said that, the Hellhound came at us and I shot a fireball at him, Dean glancing at me and though a little scared and miffed, he nodded because it was part of who I was. Since everything happened with Jen, I had decided to focus on tapping into the inner witch because I never wanted to be caught off guard and weak again…that and I had called my mother about my inner demon—literally. Now I could shoot fireballs almost just at will, but I still had to spend time focusing and that was what I needed to work on—I had to get faster at this.

The fire wasn't helping much though, so I stopped as Dean tried to shoot it full of silver, keeping close to him to keep him alive if he needed it. We had already stabbed and killed the first one, and this was the last one to deal with…it was just that every once in a while it twitched and we wanted them dead and gone—they were killing to kill, and nothing more…the only reason they stayed away from salt was because part of them was held in the spectral world.

"Where's the rod?" I asked, frantically, pulling Dean back into the salt circle.

"It's across the room." Dean told me, pointing at it.

I let out an annoyed noise. "Fuck!"

"It probably wasn't such a good idea to leave the rod over there." Dean told me, flashing _me_ a cheeky smile this time.

"Well maybe if you hadn't started yelling at me to get into the circle, I would have remembered it." I told him, with a shrug.

"I had to save your ass because you weren't fast enough." Dean replied.

I scoffed at him. "Yeah, and you got yourself hurt."

Dean glared as the Hellhound growled at us and I folded my arms across my chest because I wasn't backing down on that. The two of us were _both_ stubborn and he looked like he had an idea suddenly and I wasn't sure what to do about it. He eyes had flashed, and I kind of just wanted to stare at him and maybe kiss him and apologize again.

"You want to go and get the rod?" Dean asked me, giving me a look.

I did a double-take. "I thought you didn't want me to go out of the circle."

"Well I'm, not going to get myself foolishly hurt saving your ass again when you left the rod over there in the first place." Dean replied and smiled at me since it was riling me up and totally making me want him more.

"Stop arguing with me." I told him firmly.

He smirked at me. "Why?"

"Because! It's making me want you!" I admitted loudly.

Dean nodded and chuckled. "I know…I'm banking on some angry sex when this is over."

I rolled my eyes playfully as the growling of the Hellhound got louder, and so Dean and I decided that he was going to go ahead and distract the beast while I got the rod. So as Dean left the circle in one direction, I took off the other direction as the Hound followed him and grabbed the rod, lunging at the beast and driving it through his body.

"Fire, Lanni! Now!" Dean said, trying to hold the Hellhound off with his rifle.

I shot the dog with a fireball, and Dean jumped away from the beast and held onto me, having me leave the old house and we watched as the house began to burn. I hadn't mean to start a fire, but the Hellhounds were dead and that was all mattered, so we had to count ourselves lucky. Then I looked up at Dean and had to bite my lips to keep my hormones in check.

"You're bleeding." I told him, holding back the urge to jump him while he was all sweaty, dirty and bloody.

"I'll be fine," he said, and smirked at me, making me flush warm with want, but all I could do was bite my lip because after leaning in ever so slightly, he walked away from me to go and tell Sam and Kate that it was finished.

**Note: Oh the drama, the drama. Maybe we'll start of with angry sex next chapter, maybe we won't, lol. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	9. My Future is With You

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Oh look…more Hellhounds. That must mean that this chapter is long and important, lol. It is, so I hope you enjoy it, because a really big milestone is about to happen for Lana and Dean.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

"I freaking love this freaking food." I said happily.

"I can tell—you're packing it in." Dean told me, shooting me a look that said he loved me, but he also thought it was time to be playful too and I loved it.

I gave him a look. "You should know from experience that I do not gain weight from eating anything—the only time I gained any weight, I was pregnant."

"And then you gained it gracefully." Sam replied with a smile, sipping his coffee as we sat in the diner.

I smiled at him and ate my bite of pancake playfully. "That I most certainly did."

Part of me was still a little choked up every time the baby was mentioned, but at the same time I was trying to be playful again. I miss old me, the boys missed old me, and old me was playful, cheeky and stubborn—not to mention a smart mouth. So I was going back to my old habits no matter how hard that was proving to be sometimes and they would have to deal with that…besides, Kate wasn't here right now to do it, so some female had to.

Sam had been a little upset about it, but I knew that he was waiting for her to come back—it was written all over his face. He missed her—we all did—and she'd be back eventually, just right now she had to focus on her family and it was really sweet that he understood and cared about her so much already. I winked at him as I ate my pancake and then Dean cleared his throat.

"Please don't eat your pancake like that," Dean told me with a sigh, "_especially_ not when you're flirting with Sam."

I turned to him and frowned a little. "I'm not flirting with your brother…"

"It's just that you made me want you right there." He said, drinking his coffee too.

"Happens—I seem to have that effect on people." I told him, winking at him.

He smiled at me and rolled his eyes as he chuckled, all three of us looking up as our waiter came over to our table. I can't say that he wasn't attractive either—he had deep brown eyes and light brown hair, with some stuble and a killer grin. He had been incredibly sweet to us to, and he was most certainly getting a tip no matter what.

"This is on the house," the waiter said, and I smirked at him and he checked me out he walked away.

"See?" I said with a smile on my face, "but unlike you, I'm not going to bang him just because he was sweet to me—it's not my style, and thank God it's not yours anymore."

"That's the fifth thing on the house today." Dean said after shooting me a look for my response to him and then he pointed at the plate. "You gonna eat it?"

I shot him a look. "Dude…its pie."

He sighed loudly. "Fine."

"You sure you don't want to share?" Sam asked me, both of them looking at the pie rather hungrily.

I got a bite on my fork and slowly raised it to my mouth, taking a bite and smiling, closing my eyes and moaning a bit happily. It was damn good pie and I was _not_ sharing it. There was just something about it that made it practically perfect, and it was my gift from the really attractive waiter, so I was going to be nice and eat it.

"Stop…" Dean said slowly, running his foot along mine.

I opened my eyes. "This is better than sex."

"You did not just say that!" Dean told me, gasping a little like a girl.

"Oh, I think I did." I said with a nod. "I mean not that making love isn't fun, and the random banging sometimes when we're horny isn't fantastic—cause it is—it's just that this is _damn_ good apple pie! Now…let's get down to business."

Dean sighed loudly. "All right, fine."

"Well, so much for our low profile. You got a warrant in St. Louis." Sam said, looking up from his laptop, "and now you're officially in the Fed's database."

"Dude, I'm like Dillinger or something." He said, drinking his coffee.

"Dean, it's not funny." He said as I giggled and stopped as he looked at me.

I closed my mouth. "Sorry…not funny…"

I really couldn't help laughing at Dean because he was so adorable, but at the same time I knew that I needed to buckle down. We were talking about Dean being on the run, and it was important that we understood what we were going to have to do, and to figure out how to stay under the radar. Besides, perhaps that meant a few more motel room trysts for Dean and I in the future…I could dream.

"It makes the job harder—we've gotta be more careful now." Sam explained giving Dean and I looks.

"Well, what do they got on you?" Dean asked him. "What do they got on Lanni? Kate?"

Sam looked down at the laptop. "I'm sure they just haven't posted it yet."

"Wait, no accessory? Nothing?" Dean asked him.

"Shut-up," Sam told him.

Dean chuckled loudly. "You're jealous."

"No, I'm not." Sam protested.

"I'm a little jealous," I admitted with a shrug.

"Uh-huh," Dean replied, eating some food, and then chuckling a little more as Sam gave a look at his laptop. "All right, well what do you got on the case there, you innocent harmless young man, you?"

Sam closed his laptop and grabbed the papers. "Architect Sean Boyden plummeted to his death from the roof of his home—a condominium he designed."

"I think this could be closely related to what we did last time." I said with a simple shrug. "Called animal control, complained about a 'vicious, wild, black dog', the authorities couldn't find it, no one else saw it—in fact, the authorities are a little confused as to how a wild dog could get past the doorman, take the elevator up, and start roaming the halls of the cushiest joint in town…you know, unless it's our kind of gig with Hellhounds attached to it."

Dean chuckled at me. "Well look who's all cheeky—as far as I know, the Hellhounds are corporeal."

"No, honey—there are several types. Come on…have my feelings ever been wrong?" I asked him, raising a forkful of pie up to his mouth.

For a moment Dean and Sam just looked at me and I didn't get it until I realized what I was doing—I was trying to feed him. Who did I think I was? His girlfriend? Wait, I _was_ his girlfriend, but I think that I was jumping the gun a bit because Dean and I were serious, sure, but I was trying to _feed _him. I hadn't even been trying to do it on purpose, it just kind of happened because I was trying to be affectionate.

"On top of that being PDA…you didn't even offer me any," Sam teased, laughing as Dean glanced at the forkful of pie, me sliding the plate over and letting same eat a little of it. "Wow…this is fantastic."

I was about to pull the fork away from Dean's mouth when he ate it. "Sorry…I didn't realize what I was doing, nor did I realize it was going to be offensive to you or something."

"Not offensive—I just wasn't expecting it." Dean said, pausing as the flavor hit his tongue. "Damn…that is amazing pie."

"Told you," I responded, smiling as he stroked my hair. "Now, Jen said that Hellhounds are death omens and the only reason we got corporeal ones was because they turned on their masters."

Sam nodded with a smile on his face. "Yeah, there are spectral black dogs all over the world, but some say they're animal spirits, others say death omens—Hellhounds kind of fits if we could narrow the research down. They're mean, nasty—"

"—yeah, bet they could hump the crap out of your leg. Look at that one. Huh?" Dean chuckled, showing us the picture he'd been given in mine and Sam's stack of papers of research.

I laughed a little. "I must be as immature as you because I found that funny."

"I didn't." Sam admitted to us.

"What? They could." Dean said as Sam gave him a look.

xx

The three of us got dressed up in suits and as we went up to the door of the house, Dean brushed a stray strand of hair out of my face and I blushed a little. Then I pinned it back and he smiled, stepping a little closer, and I loved it more than I could admit out loud. I stepped up closer to him and took a hold on his jacket, smiling up at him.

"So we're from Architectural Digest?" I asked him, rocking up on my feet, our face close.

He nodded and stroked my hair. "Yeah…"

Sam knocked on the door and then the man let us in and we talked to him for a while, making sure that we had every fact straight. It wouldn't be very good if we just blew into town, thought we knew everything, and screwed up the hunt, so we were doing research to make sure that my Hellhound theory was actually correct.

"So, you and Sean Boyden were business partners for, almost ten years right?" Sam asked him.

"That's right." The man answered. "Now one more time this is for?"

"A tribute for Mr. Boyden—_Architectural Digest_." Dean replied, giving a smile as I wrote things down and the man chuckled. "Funny to you?"

The man shook his head. "No it—it's a tribute. Yeah. See, Sean always got the tributes. He kills himself, and leaves me and his family behind, but he gets another tribute."

I nodded at that and realized I was picking up a few things from him—he was jealous. It wasn't even an 'I would kill him' kind of jealous though…he just seemed to be passed over and slightly bitter about it. There was nothing ominous about him, and yet…there was definitely something more going on here than met the eye.

"Right," Sam replied slowly. "You have any idea why he'd do such a thing?"

The man shook his head. "No, I have no clue. I mean he lived a charmed life."

"How so?" I asked, looking up from my notepad.

"He was a flat-out genius." He answered quickly. "I mean I'm capable, but next to him?" He shook his head. "It wasn't always that way either."

"No?" Dean asked.

He looked at us. "You want to know the truth? There was a time where he couldn't even design a pup tent. Hell, 10 years ago he was working as a bartender at this place called Lloyd's—a complete dive."

"So what changed?" Sam asked.

"You got me, but overnight he gets this huge commission, and he starts designing—he starts designing the most ingenious buildings anyone has ever seen. It was like the level of Van Gogh and Mozart, it—" He trailed off.

"What?" Dean asked.

The man laughed a little as he shook his head sadly. "It's funny—true geniuses. They seem to die young, don't they? To have that kind of talent…why—why throw it away?"

"Thank you for you time." I told him, and smiled.

As we left, we went to the Animal Protection Agency and Sam and I sent Dean inside to get the information we needed about people calling in about black dogs. We wanted to know if there was more to this than just some spectral black dog—to a Hellhound—and I wanted to go straight to Lloyd's Bar, but we had to check records first. Honestly, we had to see how many people had been targeted and see if there was a pattern so we could save the next person before they were targeted.

"What did you find out?" I asked Dean when he came to the car and got into it.

Dean smirked. "Well, the secretary hit on me. Other than that, every complaint called in this week about anything, big, black or doglike. There are 19 calls in all, and uh, I don't know what this is."

"You mean Carly's MySpace address?" Sam asked when Dean handed Sam the yellow sticky note.

"Yeah, MySpace—what the Hell is that?" Dean asked as Sam chuckled again and I held back a laugh. "Seriously, is it like some sort of porn site? I mean…it's yours. You can use it if you want."

I rolled my eyes. "Wow that was a damn nice comeback."

Dean smiled at me and we decided to check out all the houses, and then when we had gotten to enough of them, I decided to just sit it out in the car. I was so certain that every answer we needed was at the bar, but we had checked the houses first for more clues and honestly it made sense but I wanted to check out the bar. So when the boys came back, they told us the connection was Lloyd's Bar—yay for my instincts—and I nodded as we drove out there.

"It's a crossroad." I told them as we got out of the car and walked towards the bar past yellow flowers, me leaning down and looking at it. "It's yarrow flowers…"

I trailed off as Sam nodded slowly, Dean looking at us confused. It wasn't that he didn't know what they were it was that he hadn't completely put it all together yet and Sam's wheels were still turning. For some reason I was feeling a little sick to my stomach, and I knew that wasn't a coincidence…I was part of this somehow and I needed to know _how _so I could feel at ease.

"They're used for summoning spells and how much of a 'coincidence' does it take to have the victims both getting successful overnight ten years ago hanging out at Lloyd's?" I asked them, heading over to the middle of the crossroads and then held my hand out over the dirt, muttering a spell and then smiling when the dirt began to move and I pulled a box out when it was uncovered. "Wow, my instincts are getting incredible."

"Practice makes perfect," Sam said gently.

Dean nodded and looked over my shoulder as I opened up the box, looking at the contents and swallowing. There were some bones, a vial of dirt and a photo and it was pretty obvious that we were _definitely _dealing with Hellhounds. The only thing now was that we couldn't save these people…at least _I_ didn't know how to save them from their own foolish decisions.

"I'd be willing to bet that's graveyard dirt." Sam pointed out.

I nodded at him. "And definitely a black cat bone."

"That's serious spell work—I mean that's deep, south voodoo stuff." Dean told us.

"This isn't a normal hunt, you guys. Crossroads are used not just to summon demons—they're used to make pacts with them." I explained, ignoring the looks thrown my way because they weren't stupid. "They sell their souls and then the Hellhounds come to collect it. I mean the corporeal ones that we came across were just rogue, which means a demon got sloppy in collection…these spectral ones are some serious shit."

Dean nodded at me. "Whatever this demon is, it's back and it's collecting…and wherever that doctor lady is running, she ain't running fast enough."

"So it's just like the Robert Johnson legend, right?" Sam asked is. "I mean 'selling your soul at the crossroads' kind of deal?"

"Except that wasn't a legend—you know his music." Dean replied as I nodded and Sam looked at us blankly.

I raised my eyebrows. "You don't know Robert Johnson songs?"

"Sam, there's occult references all over his lyrics. 'Crossroad Blues', 'The Devil and Me Blues', 'There's a Hellhound on my Trail'?" Dean sighed when Sam still looked at us blankly and smiled at me because I knew what he was talking about. "Story goes he died choking on his own blood. He was hallucinating, and, and muttering about big evil dogs."

"And now it's happening all over again." Sam said slowly.

I nodded at him and swallowed…I wasn't ready for this. "Yeah…"

Sam nodded and only Dean was noticing the worried look on my face because I was trying desperately to keep focused. I knew that eventually I'd have to come clean and explain all about my demon blood, but I was trying to figure out how I was connected to _this_—to _this_ crossroads. It was so hard for me to understand, and at the same time I knew that eventually out hunting I would come closer to my father—whoever he was.

"We gotta find out who else struck bargains around here." Sam told us suddenly.

"Right, so we gotta clean up these peoples' messes for them?" Dean asked him skeptically. "I mean they're not exactly squeaky-clean. No one put a gun up to their heads and forced them to play 'let's make a deal'."

Sam looked at him. "So what, we should just leave them to die?"

"Someone goes over Niagra in a barrel, you gonna jump in and save them?" Dean asked him.

"Dean…" Sam said.

Dean sighed loudly. "All right…fine."

"Rituals like this you gotta put your picture into the mix. So that guy probably summoned him. We can see if anyone in the bar knows him." I offered trying to stop what could potentially become another argument.

"If he's still alive," Dean said, walking past us to the bar.

"I'm worried about him." Sam told me.

I nodded and put my hands in my pockets. "I am too."

xx

"What's this guy's name again?" Sam asked as we went up the stairs of a building.

"George Darrow. Apparently quite the regular at Lloyd's." Dean replied and looked around the run-down place nodding slowly. "This house probably ain't the next up on 'MTV Cribbs' is it?"

Sam nodded at him. "Yeah, so whatever deal this guy made…"

"Wasn't for money," I replied and straightened out my clothes.

"Who knows? Maybe this place is full of babes with Princess Leia bikinis." Dean said, and I gave him a look that he didn't see since I was walking behind them, but Sam sighed. "I'm just saying—this guy's got one big epic bill due. I hope he at least asked for something fun."

When we got to the door, we found some black stuff under the crack and I bent down, touching it. I licked one of my other fingers and touched it again, bringing it up to my nose and smelling it. Yeah…definitely dealing with a man who knew what he was doing and what he was dealing with.

"Smells like pepper." I said and smiled awkwardly when the door opened suddenly and a black man popped his head out.

He looked at us. "Who the Hell are you?"

"George Darrow?" Dean asked him.

"I'm not buying anything." The man replied, and tried to shut the door.

"Whoa, whoa, looks like you went for the wrong shaker there." Dean told him. "Usually when you want to keep something evil out, you use salt."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He replied, though he knew we knew something now.

I nodded and showed him the picture. "We found this…have the Hellhounds showed yet? We really just…don't mean any harm. Can we have 5 minutes of your time please?"

I smiled the smile at him that I was so good at and he nodded slowly, letting us inside. There were lots of paintings around and I smiled a little, pretty certain that he had asked for some talent—he was _amazing_. His paintings were brilliant and I felt terrible that somehow I was connected to all of this…I felt terrible because I felt responsible. Was it possible that he had made a deal with _my father_…and that was why I felt so connected to all of this?

"So that stuff out there…Goofer Dust?" I asked him.

George smiled at me. "Well you definitely know something."

"Yeah…well _I_ do. I mean not that they don't—they know demons—it's the HooDoo they aren't familiar with. I'm Alana Rose Meckenzie." I explained and swallowed when he nodded at me…and it was with _knowing_. "You knew my mother…didn't you?"

"Florence Abigail Meckenzie…that was your mother?" George asked me.

I nodded at him. "That's my mother, yeah…how did you know her?"

Sam and Dean realized that they were no longer part of the conversation and took a couple of steps back to let me do what I needed to do. It was part of my past even though I didn't know him, and I smiled at George as he took a breath. He was going to tell me some things I didn't want to know, and yet at the same time, I probably did.

"Your mother came to me about two years into the sentence and she bought one of my paintings. She didn't have much, but she told me she was sorry, and that she knew who had come around." George explained and then he shrugged. "She mentioned her daughters, and that was really about it."

I nodded at him. "So you made the deal to get talent? Mr. Darrow, we think we might be able to help you."

"Listen, I get that you all want to help, but sometimes a person makes their bed and they just got to lie down in it. I'm the one that called the demon in the first place." George explained to us.

"Just because you called him doesn't mean that we can't help you out of this deal." I told him softly.

He looked at me. "I appreciate it, but I was weak. I mean who doesn't want to be great? Who don't want their life to _mean_ something? I just…I just never thought about the price."

"Was it worth it?" Dean asked him slowly.

"Hell no. Course, I asked for talent. I should've gone for fame." He chuckled a little. "I'm still broke…and lonely. Just got this pile of paintings don't nobody want."

I looked around at the paintings and smiled a little. "They really are fantastic—I can see why my mother bought one…what happened to the demon?"

"The demon didn't leave." George said, and I nodded. "I didn't count on that. After our deal was done, the damn thing stayed around for a week, just chatting, making more deals. I tried to warn folks, but, who's gonna listen to an old drunk."

"How many others were there?" Sam asked him suddenly.

"That architect and that doctor lady. I kept up with them—they got in the papers. At least they got famous." He said and sipped his alcohol.

"Who else, George? Come on, think." Dean stressed at him.

George nodded at him. "Oh, one more…uh, nice guy, too. Hudson—Evan, I think. I don't know what he asked for. Don't matter now—we done for."

"No. No, there's gotta be a way." Sam protested.

"You don't get it! I don't want a way!" George said, setting his beer down.

"Look, you don't—" Sam began.

"Look I called that thing! I brought this on myself!" George cried, standing up. "I brought it on them. I'm going to Hell one way or another. All I want is to finish my last painting. Day or two…I'm done. I'm just trying to hold them off until I'm done. Buy some time. Okay guys, time you went. Go help somebody that wants help."

I swallowed when Sam tried to protest and George told us to leave because he wanted to finish his last painting before he died. Dean wasn't protesting because Dean thought he had brought it upon himself—which he had—and I just didn't want to push him so I shook my head at Sam and held my hand up, George looking at me.

"I'm truly sorry it wasn't worth it, George." I told him and pushed on the boys, pushing them towards the door. "Um…can I have one?"

George looked at me. "Go ahead…just go."

He said it calmly, and so I took a small one of a woman, and I followed the boys out, smiling sadly at the painting. George had given up everything and his talent hadn't been realized by the world…and I was beginning to think about what he'd said about my mother. My mother had known the demon…my mother was part of this and I needed to find her and learn how and why. She needed to return my damn phone calls.

xx

It was dark when we drove up to Evan's house, and I sighed. "What if Evan doesn't want our help either? I feel like even though we've decided to help these people, we shouldn't force ourselves on them. They did this, and if they don't want us to clean up their messes for them, then we're not doing it—I say leave the guy alone if he asks, no pushing him, all right?"

"That's why we straight out let him know what's up, and that we're here to take the demon out for him." Dean agreed.

Sam sighed when we both looked at him to agree as well and then after Dean and I nodded, we went up to the door we knocked. It took a moment or two but soon we were answered, and I noticed the panic in his voice when he spoke, even though he was acting calm as a cucumber—he was definitely our guy.

"Yes?" He asked us.

Dean smiled at him. "Evan Hudson?"

"Yeah," the man replied.

"You ever been to a place called Lloyd's? It would have been about ten years ago." Dean said nonchalantly and I practically slapped my own forehead with my hand because it was _not_ tactful at all and Evan's charade was over—he was now terrified and slammed the door in our faces. "Come on, we're not demons!"

Sam gave his brother a look. "Any other bright ideas?"

Dean took a breath and kicked the door open, and then we heard another door close upstairs so we followed. He seemed terrified to die, so maybe if we explained why we were here, we could help him…that seemed to be what he would listen to. Dean was about to kick the other door in, but Sam stopped his foot as I got in between him and the door and I shook my head at him.

"Whoa," I said, and turned to the door after telling Sam and Dean to let me handle it. "Evan, we're not demons, we're here to get you out of your deal. I have a pretty good idea of how to stop it you just have to trust us."

Evan scoffed through the door, still terrified. "How do I know you're not lying?"

"Well you don't, but you're kinda running low on options there, Buddy Boy." Dean said smiling a little and I smacked him in the chest.

"Evan it's really simple: do you want to die?" I asked him.

There was a pause and I held my hand up to silence Dean as he went to say, 'of course he doesn't' and Dean shot me a look. He really didn't like that I was taking control and it wasn't that I was taking control—it was that I knew so much about this. It was that somehow I was connected to this and that was just one more secret that I was hiding from them and I didn't know how much longer I could keep this up, _especially _after this.

"No," Evan replied and opened up the door. "Can you really stop it?"

I swallowed and nodded. "Yeah, I know a way."

"What'd you ask for anyway, Ev, Huh? Never need Viagra. Bowl a perfect game, what?" Dean asked him and I turned to him, narrowing my eyes—he _wasn't_ helping and for some reason he was pissed…and I had a feeling it was because of John since Dean thought that John had made a deal for him to save his life.

"My wife," Evan responded without a beat.

Dean chuckled at that and got condescending. "Oh, get the girl. Right, that's worth a trip to Hell for."

"Dean, stop," I told him, trying not to let it get to me. "Just for the love of God, stop it."

"No, he's right: I made the deal. Nobody twisted my arm. That, uh, woman, or whatever she was, at the bar, said I could have anything I wanted. I thought she was nuts at first, but…I don't know. I was—I was desperate." Evan said slowly.

"Desperate?" Sam asked him.

Evan sighed and nodded. "Julie was dying."

"You did it to save her?" Dean asked slowly, feeling bad for what he had said but still upset about the whole mess.

"She had cancer. They stopped treatment. They were moving her into hospice. They kept saying, 'matter of days'." Evan explained. "So, yeah…I made the deal, and I'd do it again. I'd have died for her on the spot."

Dean nodded and took it all in. "You ever think about her in all this?"

"I did this _for_ her!" Evan replied in an angry tone.

"You sure about that? I think you did this for yourself…so you wouldn't have to live without her. Well guess what? She's going to have to live without you now, but what if she knew how much it cost? What if she knew it cost you your soul? How do you think she'd feel?" Dean asked, obviously hurt.

"Okay, that's enough. Evan, sit tight all right? We're going to figure this out." Sam assured him, and then we all left the room and Dean walked ahead of us. "You all right?"

Sam and I were both worried about Dean and we knew that this whole hunt was throwing him off emotionally, which rarely happened. John had made a deal to save Dean, and he had been living with it ever since Sam had found John collapsed on the floor of his room in the hospital. There was nothing that we could say to make that better, and so Sam and I just had to let Dean know that we were there—care and share with tact, I guess.

"Why wouldn't I be?" Dean asked him with a shrug. "Hey, I got an idea. You two throw George's stuff at the Hellhounds—keep Evan safe for as long as possible. I'm gonna go to the crossroads and summon the demon."

Sam looked miffed. "Summon—are you nuts?"

"As crazy as Dean's idea sounds—and as terribly bad as it seems to let him go out in his state right now—that's the only way. The demon made the deal, and the demon can take it back. However, someone needs to stay here and protect Evan from the Hellhounds until the demon can be persuaded to back off…_if_ the demon can be persuaded."

"How do you know all of this?" Sam asked me.

I smiled at him. "That is a story for another time—when we _have_ more time. For now, use the Goofer Dust against the Hellhounds and Dean and I will take care of the demon—we have to reason with it some how and I think I know a way."

"How much time will this take?" Sam asked me.

"I don't know, a while. It's not easy for those suckers to claw their way out of Hell and back into the sunshine." Dean told him.

I felt another fight coming on as Dean got involved again. "Sammy, I know it sounds dangerous and I know that it seems suicidal, but it's our only option and we have to take it, all right? I'll protect Dean, I promise."

Sam nodded at me but he was about to protest and I wasn't sure I could handle that right then. Dean and I needed to get a move on to save Evan from the fate he'd brought upon himself, and honestly I wanted so desperately for Sam _not_ to bring up John's name. We both knew that Dean was on edge because of this, and that he was in no position to be summoning demons.

"You know all about this, so maybe you should do this on your own." Sam told me.

Dean stepped close to his brother. "She is _not_ going out there alone."

"Dean, I'll be fine on my own—you and Sam can protect Evan." I agreed and then jumped a little when Dean got angry.

"What the Hell is going on here?" Dean asked us. "Suddenly you two think I can't do my job?"

"You know, you've been on edge every since we found that crossroads, Dean," Sam explained to him without skipping a beat, "and I think I know why."

"We don't have time for this," Dean said, brushing past us.

"Dad," Sam said simply, and Dean stopped. "You think maybe Dad made one of these deals, huh? Hell, I've been thinking it. I'm sure you've been thinking it too."

We all looked at each other and let it sink in—I didn't like all this regret and anger and need for revenge, so I knew I had to be the one to handle this, even though Dean wanted to. It was the nerve that had been struck with Sam's words, and I knew that no matter what, I had to get Dean through this…he needed me. Besides, even if Dean tagged along, Sam would be here to take care of Evan, and I knew he could handle it.

"It fits, doesn't it?" Dean asked Sam. "I'm alive, Dad's dead. Yellow-eyed demon was involved. What if he did? What if he struck a deal? His life for my soul?

"I think I hear it! It's outside!" Evan called from the room.

Dean pointed to the room Evan was in. "Just keep him alive, okay?"

"Dean!" Sam protested.

"Go!" Dean said, walking down the hallway.

I hurried after him and took him by the arm him sighing and stopping, turning to me and looking me in the eye. He shook his head because he knew what was coming next and he really didn't want to have it out right then, but part of me did. Part of me felt like we really needed to talk about this even though we didn't have the time, so it was time to get right down to business.

"I'm handling this, got it?" I asked him.

He shook his head at me. "No, you're not. This is dangerous and _I'm_ going to be the one to do this. End of discussion."

"Dean—" I protested.

"—No!" Dean yelled.

I swallowed and let go of him, following him to the Impala and then getting in the passenger seat. When we got there, we drew some Devil's Traps, and then Dean put his picture in the box and buried it in the crossroads. I was beyond pissed that he wasn't letting me handle this, but I simply went to a spot near the bar that Dean had told me to hide at, and waited for the demon to show…and I didn't have to wait for very long.

"So…what brings a guy like you to a place like this?" A beautiful woman in black asked him. "You called me?"

Dean looked her over. "I'm just glad it worked."

"First time?" She asked him with a smile.

"You could say that." Dean replied with a smile of his own.

"Oh, come on now, don't sell yourself short." The woman replied, walking over to him. "I know all about you, Dean Winchester."

I rolled my eyes as she flirted away with him and suddenly realized that if I could sense her, then she could sense me, and that could potentially be a problem. We needed to be able to get through this with no hitches—I'd promised Evan that we could save him and that's mostly why I felt like _I_ should be the one talking to the demon and _not_ Dean.

"So…you know who I am." Dean told her with a nod.

She shrugged at him. "I get the newsletter."

"Well don't keep me in suspense…what have you heard?" Dean asked, getting closer to her.

"I heard you were handsome, but…you're just edible. What can I do for you, Dean?" She asked him and then turned to look at me. "Is Lana going to be joining us?"

I took a breath and stepped out from my hiding place as Dean opened his mouth to protest that they were alone and he sighed. She smiled at me and I nodded, walking over to where Dean was and smiling at her. At least I was part of this now even though she wasn't really focusing on me.

"Maybe we should do this in Dean's car?" I suggested to her.

Dean nodded in agreement. "Nice and private…"

"Sounds good to me," She replied, and the three of us headed towards the Impala.

"So I was hoping we could strike a deal." Dean told her.

She nodded and smiled. "That's what I do."

"We want Evan Hudson released from his contract." I explained to her.

"So sorry, Darling—that is _not_ negotiable." She told us with a shake of her head.

Dean nodded at her. "I'll make it worth your while."

"Oh, really? What are you offering?" She asked.

"Me." Dean replied before I could say anything.

"Well, well, well. You'd sacrifice your life for someone else's. Like father, like son. You did know about your Dad's deal, right? His life for yours. Oh, I didn't make the deal myself but, boy, I wish I had." She told him.

I was starting to get a little sick and tired of everyone mentioning John and his deal and I knew it was going to cloud Dean's judgment here. I needed him to think clearly and focus on the task at hand—the job we were _trying _to complete. After this was all over, I was going to find my mother and deal with all of this right off the bat.

"After you., Dean told the demon, opening the car door.

She smiled at him. "Such a gentleman…"

I smiled hoping she would get into the car, but before she got into the car she looked down and saw the trap. There was a Devil's Trap and some salt, which made her incredibly angry and she looked at Dean, me flexing my fingers just in case I had to do a spell and save Dean's ass.

"A Devil's trap? You've got to be kidding me. You stupid, stupid…" She slammed the door. "I should rip you from limb to limb."

They began to back up towards the next trap and I smiled as Dean said, "Take your best shot."

She stopped moving. "No, I don't think I will. I'm not going to put you out of your misery."

"Yeah? Why not?" Dean asked her and I half realized that he _wanted_ out of his misery.

"Cause your misery's the whole point. It's too much fun to watch. Knowing how your Daddy died for you, how he sold his soul. I mean, that's got to hurt." She replied, walking up to him as he was pressed against this pillar of wood. "He's all you ever think about. You wake up and your first thought is, 'I can't do this anymore'. You're all lit up with pain. I mean you loved him so much, and it's all your fault." She chuckled at him. "You blew it, Dean. I could have given you what you need—Lana didn't even explain to you what I was capable of."

"What do I need?" Dean asked thankfully not taking the bait to be upset with me.

"Your father," she replied after a pause and I looked up at her—bitch had gone there. "I could have brought him back…your Loss. See ya, Dean. Have a nice, long life."

"Hold on," Dean told her as she began to walk away, and he got under the other trap, so I figured we were fine, especially when she smiled.

I was holding my ground pretty firmly, watching it go down and taking everything she was throwing at me, but the second that the deal started to go south I was ready to jump in and take control. It wasn't that I didn't trust Dean—I did with everything I had—but I also knew that things had been hard for him lately. Besides, this deal she was offering was incredibly enticing, and I couldn't blame him if he thought about it—but I'd kill him if he took it.

"You're lucky I've got a soft spot for lost puppies and long faces." She said, going back over to him. "I can't just leave you like this. Besides, you didn't come here to bargain for Evan. Not really."

"Can you bring him back? My dad?" Dean asked in a serious voice, and it almost sounded too serious.

I was about to take a couple of steps towards them, but she was so close to getting under the old wooden structure with him. We really needed her under the trap and maybe—just maybe—Dean was only saying these things as part of the plan. Still…something in his eyes was making me start to rethink all of this—maybe I needed to be pro-active.

"Of course I can…just as he was. Your dad would live a long, natural life, just like he was meant to. That's a promise." She said with a nod.

Dean took a deep breath. "What about me?"

"I could give you ten years, ten long, good years with him. That's a lifetime. The family can be together again. John, Dean, Sammy. The Winchester boys all reunited. You'll even have Lana by your side—maybe settle down and adopt a few kids since she can't give you any." She smiled and walked under the structure with him and I had to hide my joy of her being trapped, and also my pain of the things that she knew and how far she was willing to go. "Look, your dad is supposed to be alive. You're supposed to be dead. So, we'll just set things straight. Put things back in their natural order, and you get ten more years on top: that's a bonus."

"You think you could…" Dean said, walking out of the structure as I started to go over towards them. "Throw in a set of steak knives?"

"You know this smart-ass self defense mechanism of yours…" she began, but realized she couldn't follow him out of the structure.

Looking up she saw the other Devil's Trap, and then looked at him. "Dean…"

"You're really trapped now. That's gotta hurt." Dean told her.

"Let me out now." She said firmly.

I laughed and shook my head. "You're not getting out of here unless you call off your Hellhound and let Evan go. Then, we will let _you_ go."

"I can't break a binding contract." She explained as Dean circled her.

"And by 'can't' you mean 'don't want to'? Last chance. Evan and his wife get to live to a ripe old age. Going…going…" Dean said slowly.

She looked at him, freaking out a little. "Let's talk about this."

"Okay, gone," he said, pulling out a journal and opening it up.

"What are you doing?" She asked nervously.

Dean smirked at her. "You're going on a trip…way down South."

"Look, forget Evan. Think of your dad." She tried, desperate now.

Dean stopped for a moment and looked up at her before I looked at Dean and when we made eye contact, he began to speak in Latin. He could do this—he had the strength to handle her without me. She began to get exorcised, but stayed silent until the very end and I raised my eyebrows…had she actually broken?

"Wait!" She said and when Dean went under the wood with her, she kissed him, making me cringe all over.

Dean pulled away from her. "What the Hell was that for?"

"Sealing the deal," she told him.

"You know, usually I like to be warned before I'm violated with demon tongue," he replied and I shuddered.

"Evan Hudson is free." She told us. "He and his wife will live long lives."

I nodded at her. "And because your word is your bond, you can't break this? You made the deal and now Evan is free."

"Yes. You got what you wanted, now let me go." She said firmly and glared when Dean backed up out of the structure and held onto the cross necklace. "You're going to double-cross me? Funny how _I'm_ the trustworthy one. You know, you renege, send me to Hell, sooner or later I'm going to climb my way out and skinning Evan Hudson will be the _first_ thing I do." She said, leaning on the pillars.

I put my hand on Dean's. "Let her go."

Dean nodded at me and I smiled at him, letting the demon go and making sure that she could get out. It had been the deal and now Evan was safe and that was what we had been going for in the first place. Now we just had to get out of here and had to get out now.

"I gotta tell you, you would never pull that stunt if you knew," she said as she began to walk away.

Dean looked at her and I swallowed. "Knew what?"

"Where your Dad is—you should have made that deal. You see, people talk about Hell, but it's just a word…doesn't even come close to describing the real thing." She explained to him.

"Shut your mouth, Bitch." Dean told her in a hurt, angry voice.

"If you could see your poor Daddy…hear the sounds he makes 'cause he can't scream," she said and both she and Dean were surprised when I backhanded her face.

"How about I send you back there?" Dean replied, going over to her, but the demon stopped possessing the girl and she fell to the ground and then looked up at Dean as I knelt down beside her.

"What? How did I get here?" She asked, starting to cry.

I smiled at her softly. "It's okay…we'll get you back."

xx

As we drove away from the town, I sat in the backseat and looked at the boys as they talked to each other and the radio played. There were things to discuss and Sam wanted to know if the demon was actually telling the truth about John. If John had made a deal then John was definitely in Hell…the demon was telling the truth and I was pretty sure that Dean understood that.

"Demons lie all the time, right? Maybe she was lying." Sam said as I hugged myself.

Dean glanced at him skeptically. "Come on, is that really what you think? How could he do it?"

"He did it for you." Sam said slowly.

"Exactly. How am I supposed to live with that?" Dean asked Sam and I. "You know the thought of him…wherever he is right now…I mean he spent his whole life chasing that yellow-eyed son of a bitch, he should have gone down fighting. It was supposed to be his legacy, you know? Not bargaining with the damn thing. Not this."

Sam nodded at him. "How many people do you think Dad saved? Total?"

"That's not the point, Sam." Dean told him.

"Evan Hudson is safe because of what Dad taught us. That's his legacy Dean. Now we're still here, man. So we gotta keep going…for him." Sam explained and we were all silent until Sam spoke up again. "Hey, Dean?"

I didn't like the tone in his voice and I knew he was about to ask the question I had wanted to ask but left alone when we got the girl to where she needed to be. Dean had come close to making a deal and Sam and I _needed_ to know if he would have really gone through with it.

"Yeah?" Dean asked him.

Sam took a breath. "When you were trapping that thing you weren't…I mean it was all a trick, right? You never considered actually making that deal, right?"

When Dean didn't answer and then switched from the blues to the hardcore metal, Sam and I had the same feeling—it was of pain. Dean had thought that his problems might have been able to be solved by selling his soul to bring John back. We were silent until we got to the motel and then Sam decided to go straight to bed and Dean left the room to go and get something to drink.

"Go to him…it's the right thing to do." Sam told me, and I knew that we were on the same page.

It wasn't fair to any of us for us to try and cover up our true feelings just because life was hard at the moment. I went out of the door and saw Dean at the vending machine, shoving my hands in my pockets and looking at the ground before looking at his back to me and taking a breath.

"Why would you even have considered it?" I asked him suddenly and though it was tactless, I knew it had to be done.

"Because she brought up a nice proposition," he said, shrugging as he looked at me.

I nodded and swallowed. "But what were you thinking?"

"Lanni, it felt like the right thing to do at first." Dean protested, turning away from me to put some change into the machine.

"All right, how about we use _your_ logic. Did you ever think about me in all of this?" I asked, wishing I wasn't bringing this up right now, but knowing I needed to.

"That's a little selfish, don't you think?" Dean asked, trying to be funny, but he knew this was serious and he turned to me to let me know he was listening to what I had to say.

"Did you think that maybe without you, I would be a walking shell of something else?" I asked him. "You mean absolutely _everything_ to me. I know you miss your father, and I do too, but…I need _you_. Even if I had ten years with you, just those ten years and nothing more isn't enough for me. I know I've been distant because of this whole baby thing, but I can't live life without you and I can't believe that you don't know that by now." I said, nodding a little as he turned to face the vending machine once more. "I've been making an effort because I know that you keep saying you want me, and this space we've put between us to cope is wrong. I'm in love with you, you flaming idiot."

Dean turned to me as his soda bottle fell into the slot, and he smiled a little. "What?"

I sighed. "God, Dean."

I walked over to him and grabbed a handful of his shirt before I pulled him to me. I kissed him hard at first, but when he returned the kiss with absolutely no hesitation, the kiss softened, and he wrapped his arms around me. It was a big step from 'I love you' to 'I'm in love with you', but that was how I felt and Dean seemed pretty glad that I _did _feel that way about him. We had to reposition ourselves a little, but our lips never left each others and I couldn't help but smile a little as our lips stayed pressed together for a long while. I stroked his cheek and then when we pulled away finally he smiled and rested his forehead against mine.

"Where do we go from here?" Dean asked me, nuzzling my nose a little with his.

I opened my mouth to answer when my cell phone rang. "I'll get back to you on that."

Dean nodded and stroked my hair softly, kissing me again. "Rain check? Oh, God…now I sound like Kate."

**Note: I know, I know—I miss Kate too, lol. The next chapter is pretty intense, so stay tuned. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	10. Through Thick and Thin, I'm With You

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**I'm kinda in love with this one and I hope you guys like it too.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Dean's POV**

When I woke up in the middle of the night and propped my head up on my hand, smiling a little at Lana while she slept. She looked so calm, and there was a slight smile on her face so I was hoping that meant she was dreaming about something nice. I knew that this woman had me hook, line and sinker, and though part of me was really upset with her about that, part of me really wouldn't have it any other way. It was just that I still had this sinking feeling that I was going to get her killed someday and I _really_ didn't want to bring Lana any pain…no matter what.

I was still mad at her for the secrets she had kept, but I had my fair share of secrets I hadn't divulged to her yet, and so I knew I shouldn't be. She would have told me had the time been right—I definitely trusted the angel sleeping next to me. I reached out to stroke her hair and she stirred a little, but she didn't show any signs of opening up her eyes to wake up just yet, so I glanced over to see what Sam was doing. He was actually sleeping too, and when I looked back at Lana I couldn't resist…I leaned down and kissed her lips softly, and then got up and started to get dressed—I could always come back and win her over with something.

"The warmth all went away." Lana whispered to me as I pulled on my pants.

I turned to her and smiled at her pout. "It'll come back later."

"Yeah, but how _much_ later?" She asked, propping herself up on her elbows. "I was kinda hoping for you to be copping some feels and maybe trying to solicit early morning sex…"

"It's kind of the middle of the night, Lanni." I told her chuckling. "I figured I would go out and maybe get some beers."

Lana nodded at me thoughtfully and cocked her head to one side. "And bring them back?"

I rolled my eyes and nodded, zipping up my jeans and climbing onto the bed with her, hovering my face above hers, our noses touching. We stayed that way for a moment or two and then she ran her nose along mine, kissing me much too swiftly for me to kiss her back and it made me groan a little. The little tease had really learned some things from me I had hoped she wouldn't pick up and it was making me come undone.

"Absolutely, Baby," I said, leaning in to kiss her and groaning again when she pulled back after only a second of contact with our lips.

She nodded at me. "Let me get this straight: you woke up in the middle of the night, had a hankering for beers and now you're going to head out and get them and then bring them back?"

I nodded at her, raising my eyebrows a second at the playful tone in her voice, and then swallowing when she shrugged one of her tank straps off of her shoulder. She was doing this on purpose to get a rise out of me…and it was working and she knew it. I couldn't control my urges, and I shouldn't have been expected to—I was a man, and my beautiful girlfriend was showing off her flesh when I was feeling happy…in rather naughty places.

"Maybe satisfy some urges when you get back?" She asked me with a wink.

I kissed her. "Maybe we can just satisfy the urges now…"

"We can't do it _now_!" Lana protested, pushing on my chest as I showered her mouth with kisses and grunted in protest for what felt like the hundredth time. "Sam's sleeping!"

I sighed and nodded. "Fine…"

"Dean, I'm sorry!" She told me as I got up to get my jacket. "I would totally take you right now but your brother is right there and I am _not_ having sex with you while he's only like two feet away."

I chuckled a little at the look that would bring to Sam's face were it to actually happen and then nodded at her. She smiled when I sent her a reassuring smile, and then started to head out when her voice stopped me.

"Bring me back a coffee and I'm yours forever." Lana called out to me in a whisper.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I had really _not_ wanted to wake Sam up at all, and smiled at Dean when he raised his eyebrows at me playfully and adjusted his jacket. He was highly amused by me and definitely still horny—I was too, honestly—and I was glad that we were both able to be playful right now…we needed it.

"You weren't mine forever before?" Dean asked me.

I rolled my eyes and laughed softly. "I'll be yours forever and a _day_ then."

"That's more like it." Dean told me, and then just like that he was out the door.

I smiled and laid back on the bed, looking up at the ceiling and running my fingertips along my lips softly, thinking about it all. I _had_ been asleep for a good while, but I had felt Dean's lips brush against mine, and I was flattered he had been watching me sleep. That was the second time he'd kissed me while I had been sleeping and I was going to take it as an incredibly good sign…stalkerish as watching someone while they slept seemed, it was a little flattering.

"What in the world did I do to deserve him?" I asked myself softly.

I was pretty certain that I knew the answer to that—nothing. I was still hiding so much about myself and I didn't know how to get any of it off of my chest because it would devastate him. At the same time…what if Dean _couldn't_ really love me? What if he couldn't _actually_ be in love with me because he didn't actually _know_ me? Oh God…what if I was effectively ruining the best thing that had _ever_ happened to me?

Sitting up quickly, I ran my fingers through my hair and took a deep breath—I hadn't thought about it like that before. Sam and Dean Winchester had waltzed into my life when I had least expected it, and now I was smitten with them…they were my family. I was still _always_ going to love Jen and Kevin, but Dean was my soul mate…I believed that…so what if my keeping secrets was ruining that?

"I have to come clean about _all_ of it." I told myself with an affirmative nod. "It is more than time for me to tell them."

I looked over at Sam when I heard him stir a little and I got concerned—I hated it when Sam didn't sleep well. I figured that he was having another nightmare, so I got up and went over to his bed, leaning down and touching his shoulder. If I could help him through this then I was going to, because Sam had _always_ been there for me and I owed him so much more than he'd ever know.

"Sam?" I asked him, pushing on his shoulder softly. "Are you okay?"

I felt a strong hand hit me though, and I fell backwards as he fell off of the bed and Dean came in the room. I rubbed my painful head since I had hit the floor pretty hard, and Sam sat up breathing heavily and Dean looked confused and worried. Sam as having a rough time, and I was sitting on the floor knocked on my ass with a bump on my head and neither of us looked very happy.

"Sammy?" Dean asked him.

Sam looked directly over at me, aware of what he'd done. "Are you okay, Lan?"

I nodded slowly. "I just…_wow_ you hit hard when you're dreaming."

"I'm so sorry," Sam said reaching out to check my head as Dean set the beers and my coffee down.

"I'm fine, really." I told him, standing up. "What did you see?"

xx

"Continue on R224 West." The woman on the navigation on Sam's phone instructed.

Sam nodded at it and then looked at Dean. "There are only two towns in the U.S. named River Grove."

"How come you're so sure it's the one in Oregon?" Dean asked him again, his eyes leaving the road in front of him for only a moment.

"There was a picture." Sam answered him. "Crater Lake."

I nodded at him and stared at my empty coffee cup from the backseat. "Okay, what else did you see, Sammy?"

"I saw a dark room, some people, and a guy tied to a chair." Sam answered slowly with a shrug because he'd already told us the just of it.

To be honest Sam hadn't really told us much and Dean and I were still trying to get all of the specifics out of him. Basically all we knew was that Dean had killed one of the guys in Sam's vision, and we were headed to wherever he was to try and figure out what was going on. I had a feeling Sam was just worried because of what he thought his visions meant, but there was something darker going on and I had a feeling that my second to last secret was about to come out.

"And I ventilated him?" Dean asked Sam, making sure he had the story straight.

Sam nodded slowly. "Yeah…you thought there was something inside him."

"Like a demon? Was he possessed?" I asked Sam, trying to catch the looks on his face so I could get a better handle on what he was feeling.

"I don't know." Sam said irritably.

"All your weirdo visions are always tied to the yellow-eyed demon somehow. Was there any black smoke? Did we try to exorcise him?" Dean tried when he noted Sam's tone as I had done.

Sam shook his head at us. "No, nothing, you just plugged him—that's it."

"Well, I'm sure I had a good reason." Dean replied with a small nod.

"I sure hope so." Sam said softly.

"What does that mean? I'm not gonna waste an innocent man." Dean protested to his brother. "I wouldn't."

When Sam didn't answer I closed my eyes and I sighed loudly which caught both of their attentions. No matter how 'okay' we told each other that we were, we were still _far_ from being okay after everything we'd been through together. Sam was still worried about Dean's behavior—as was I—and Dean was sick and tired of being treated like he couldn't separate himself from the hunts and I understood that. Still, it was getting annoying to have each of them not understand what the other was _actually_ trying to say because they were both being too sensitive about all of it.

"If you guys start a pissing contest I'm jumping out of the car." I told them with a groan and then blew my bangs out of my face. "Let's just focus please on finding the guy that was tied to the chair in Sammy's vision and go from there—his visions are _not_ set in stone and now that we're warned, we can try to find a way _around_ whatever situation Sammy saw because we'll be on the look-out for other options. Now…can we at least get coffee before we get there? I'm exhausted and I'm cranky, and I kind of need a caffeine fix."

Dean nodded at me. "Yeah…we can stop at a drive through Starbucks, just for you."

I smiled at him and nodded, and after getting some coffee, we arrived in River Grove, and Sam recognized this black man sitting on a porch as a man from his vision. I pulled my hair back when I got out of the car, and then the three of us went over to question him so that we could get through this. Lord knew we needed a hunt to bring us back together in a _good_ way, and I was praying this was it because I was getting some _bad_ vibes from this town already and looked around.

"Can I help you?" The man asked us, looking at us strangely.

"Yeah…Billy Gibbons, Frank Beard, Alyssa Newman: U.S. Marshals." Sam told him, showing him his fake badge.

The man nodded. "What's this about?"

"We're looking for someone." I told him, looking at him and giving him a little smile.

"A young man—early 20s." Sam added with a nod. "He'd have a thin scar right below his hairline."

The man paused a moment. "What did he do?"

"Nothing." Sam replied quickly. "We're actually looking for someone else, but we think this young man can help us."

"Hey, he's not in any kind of trouble or anything." Dean explained. "Not yet. I think maybe you know who he is, Master Sergeant." He added, noting the tattoo on the man's arm. "My dad was in the corps. He was a corporal."

The man raised his eyebrows. "What company?"

"Echo-2-1." Dean answered immediately.

"So, can you help us?" I asked sweetly.

The man nodded slowly at us. "Duane Tanner's got a scar like that, but I know him. Good kid—keeps his nose clean."

"Oh, I'm sure he does. Um, do you know where he lives?" Dean asked politely.

"With his family, up Aspen way." The man answered.

"Thank you so much." I told him and we walked towards the car, Sam bumping into a post that has a word carved into it.

When I looked at it, I frowned, reaching out and tracing the carving as Dean said the word out loud: 'Croatoan'. Dean sounded confused about it which would normally have made me smile and call my adorable lug a goof, but this was serious. Something dark was going on here and I didn't like it…I didn't think that we should be here anymore, but I knew I wasn't going to convince the boys of that.

"Yeah, Roanoke…lost colony…ring a bell?" Sam asked Dean and then sighed. "Dean, did you pay any attention to history class?"

Dean scoffed at him. "Yeah—the shot heard around the world. How bills become laws…"

"That's not school…that's 'Schoolhouse Rock'." Sam replied.

"Whatever," Dean shrugged.

"Roanoke was one of the first English colonies in America, late fifteen hundreds." Sam told his brother with little patience.

"Oh, yeah, yeah, I do remember that. The only thing they left behind was a single word carved in a tree: 'Croatoan'." Dean contemplated.

I nodded at him and sighed. "Yeah, there were theories: Indian raid, disease…but nobody knows what _really_ happened. They were all just gone, wiped out overnight."

"With her, it's hot to be a know-it-all." Dean said as Sam sent him a look. "So…you don't think that's what's going on here?"

Sam shrugged at him. "Whatever I saw in my head, it sure wasn't good, but what do you think could do that?"

"Well, I mean, like I said, all your weirdo visions are always tied to the yellow-eyed demon somehow, so..." Dean tried, trailing off as he had made his point mostly.

"We should get help. Bobby, hum, Ellen, maybe." Sam suggested.

"Yeah, that's a good idea, and we can call Jen too." I said, but when I took out my phone I frowned. "I don't have a signal."

"I don't either." Sam agreed, and so we headed for a phone booth.

"The line's dead." Dean said, and hung up the phone. "I'll tell you one thing. If I was gonna massacre a town, that'd be my first step."

The idea of being cut off from the rest of the world in the creepy town giving off bad vibes was definitely not my idea of fun, but I did have _one_ idea. Dean was kind of rustling his hair and it was getting me a little hot and bothered when it shouldn't have been, and I knew we really had to find this guy in Sam's vision but I needed to make-out with Dean for just a moment or two first.

"So before we move on," I said, resting my hands on Dean's hips and kissing him, "can I see you in the car?"

Dean smirked at me. "Sam…wanna get us some food?"

Sam sighed at us and rolled his eyes. "Fine, but I'm only giving you two about fifteen minutes."

"It's all I need." I said, beaming at Sam.

"What?" Dean asked disappointed that we weren't going to do what he wanted.

I dragged him to the car and pushed him against it, kissing him softly, running my fingers along his stomach under his shirt. I ran my nails along it for a moment and Dean made a small moaning sound which made me smile and bite his bottom lip softly. He leaned in a little more and reached out to pull my face closer to his, running his tongue along my lips and then smirking a little.

"Screw Sam…let's get a motel room." Dean whispered, kissing me again.

I ran my lips along his and then bit his lower lip again. "You don't know how much I want that, but this is important. I just—I felt the need to jump you and this is the closest I'm going to get to it."

"Lanni…" Dean protested softly when I pouted, and I stopped him by pressing my lips to his because I couldn't think of anything else to do.

He slid his fingers deeper into my hair and kissed me passionately, sliding his tongue into my mouth and I moaned softly as he pulled me closer to him and my hips collided with his. We were definitely both hornier right then and that wasn't good because we really needed to come apart and help Sam with the hunt. Helping to save an innocent was _much_ more important than trying to take Dean in the backseat real fast…right? No, of course right…bad, Lana.

"Do you guys need another moment to exchange saliva?" Sam asked us.

I pulled away from Dean, sucking on his bottom lip a little, and shook my head slowly. Part of me was screaming at me to just blow Sam's question off and open up the back door and push Dean in, but the other part of me knew that I had to do the right thing, and so I took a feeble step back from Dean and tried to regain my composure even though I felt like a liquid puddle of goo…happy, horny goo.

"No…let's go find this guy." I said, and got into the backseat of the car.

Dean stayed paused, leaning against the car for a moment, and then he headed around to the Driver's side, the three of us silent when Dean grunted a little. Then we headed out onto the road and when we got to the Tanners', we knocked on the door and a young boy opened it and Dean stepped in to take control. I was starting to feel a little horny again too because I _loved_ it when Dean stepped up and took control…God I wanted him bad.

"We're looking for Duane Tanner." Dean explained to the teenaged boy…the attractive and _definitely_ jail bait for me, teenaged boy.

"I'm his brother, Jake," the teenager replied. "Duane is not here, he went on a fishing trip up by Roslyn Lake."

Sam nodded at him. "Are your parents home?"

"Yeah, they're inside." Jake replied with a nod.

As he said that, a man came to the door and I smirked at Jake as he smiled at me—so _what_ if he was kind of jail bait? I mean maybe he was actually 18 and legal! I was younger than Sam by a year so it wasn't like hitting on this kid would make me a pedophile or anything…he was hella attractive! Anyway, as Jake and I smiled at each other, Sam spoke up and I was truly grateful because my horny mind was dangerous.

"We're looking for your son, Duane." Sam told him.

Mr. Tanner looked at him. "Why? He's not in trouble, is he?"

"We just need to ask him a couple routine questions. That's all." Dean assured him.

"When is he due back from his trip?" Sam asked him.

"I'm not sure." Mr. Tanner said.

I raised my eyebrows because I getting a vibe from them, and it was _not_ a good one at all. I took a step towards them and smiled my smile, both Jake and Mr. Tanner focusing all attention on me like I'd made too sudden of a movement or something…and yet they were jumpy without physically being jumpy…something was _definitely_ wrong here.

"Well, maybe your wife knows." I offered him.

"No, I don't know. She's not here right now." Mr. Tanner explained.

I raised my eyebrows again. "Oh, well, Jake said she was, but he could have been mistaken. We have a number so you can get a hold of us when Duane gets back, all right?"

I made sure to hand the number to Jake and then when they closed the doors, I started to go around the house and the boys followed me. I took a deep breath when we made it to a window and I nodded when I saw a woman tied to a chair—my feelings were definitely _never_ wrong. Now I just needed to figure out what the Hell was going on here because this was getting a little too weird and deep for my taste.

"Its okay, Mom…it's not gonna hurt." Jake told his mother, who was gagged, tied to a chair and had a wound on her shoulder.

I pushed my sleeves up. "Guys…this is big—cover me."

Dean started to protest my gung ho actions, but when Jake rolled up his sleeve and his father cut his arm, the blood falling onto the woman's wound, I was already in through the window I'd broke. Mr. Tanner came at me with the knife so Dean shot him down, Jake throwing himself out of the window. Sam didn't have the heart to shoot a teenager and his pause allowed Jake to get far enough away that Sam couldn't have made the shot anyway…so Jake managed to escape…damn hot, deranged, jail bait, teen!

xx

We parked the car in front of River Grove's medical center and Sam took Mrs. Tanner in while Dean opened up the trunk to get Mr. Tanner's body out. It was sad that we had to kill the guy, but he'd left Dean with no choice and though part of me was flattered because Dean had shot him to save me, part of me thought I could have prevented it. Then again…Dean was pretty shoot first and ask questions later—definitely more than usual, and I couldn't blame him even though it worried the crap out of me.

"Nice to have a gig?" I asked Dean softly.

Dean sighed and shook his head. "Not this time."

He picked up the body that I had wrapped in a blanket, and I followed him in. I had to agree with him because this was definitely not the kind of case that was going to bring him, Sam and me closer together and that was the most annoying part of it to me. Something big and bad was going on and I didn't know how to handle it…or how Sam's vision was actually going to go down anymore…

"Is that…?" The Doctor started to ask.

Dean looked at her. "Mr. Tanner?"

"Was he attacked, too?" The Doctor asked.

"Uh, no, actually, he did the attacking, and then he got himself shot." Dean answered her curtly.

"Shot?" She asked him.

I nodded at her. "Yeah."

"And who are you?" She asked us.

"We're U.S. Marshals." I explained to her, showing her my badge. "He'd show you his but he's carrying a body and not in the position for me to just reach in and grab it out, so…"

She nodded and ushered us into the examination room, Mrs. Tanner completely beside herself because her own husband and her own son had attacked her. I would be pretty shaken up if I were her too…it was a traumatizing experience and yet…I had a feeling she wasn't going to make it out of this. There was a reason that Jake had bled on her…there was a _reason _that their goal was to mix their blood with hers and _not _to kill her…I just didn't know what it was yet.

"Beverly, do you have any idea why they would act this way? Any history of chemical dependency?" The asked her.

Mrs. Tanner shook her head. "No, of course not. I don't know why. One minute, they were my husband and my son, and the next they had the devil in them."

"We've got to talk." Dean told Sam and me, and so we followed him out of the room and into the corridor. "Those guys were whacked out of their gourds."

"What do you think? Multiple demons? Mass possession?" Sam asked us.

I shook my head. "I'm not thinking possession at all to be honest—they didn't feel like actual demons to me. They were whacked out, I agree there, but there's something else going on here because Mr. Tanner is _definitely_ dead and no black smoke came out of him…Jake bled on her…he _had_ to have a reason for that, right?"

"Whatever's going on, _something_ turned him into a monster. You know, if you would have taken out the other one, there would be one less to worry about." Dean told Sam and I blew my bangs out of my face and looked up at the ceiling—_seriously_?

Sam sighed at him. "I'm sorry, alright? I hesitated, Dean. It was a kid."

"No, it was an 'it'. It's not the best time for a bleeding heart, Sam." Dean told him.

I groaned and then looked at them. "Stop it, all right? Jake got away, deal with it, and stop pointing fingers at each other. There is something big going on here and I am _not_ condoning shooting at a teenaged kid, all right? Better he be out there and deranged in case there's potential for a cure, and not lying in here on a slab dead, all right? How's the patient?"

I had stopped to look at the Doctor as she came out to talk to us and the boys were kind of stunned by me. Normally I would just sigh and then tell them to knock it off _maybe_, but lately I had definitely grown some balls. Why? Because they _were_ my family, and no matter what was going on, I was going to keep the three of us together and they were just going to have to deal with that—they could thank me for it later.

"She's terrible—what the Hell happened out there?" She asked us.

Dean looked at her. "We don't know."

"Yeah? You just killed my next-door neighbor." She told him.

"We didn't have a choice." Dean replied slowly.

She nodded at him. "Maybe so, but we need the county sheriff—I need the coroner."

"The phones are down." Sam told her.

"I know—I tried. Tell me you've got a police radio in the car." She pleaded with us.

Sam nodded but frowned. "Yeah, we do, but it crapped out just like everything else."

"I don't understand what is happening." The Doctor said dismally.

The fact that things were getting weirder and weirder _and_ we were cut off from everyone else, totally made 'Slasher Movie' pop into my head. I felt like we were all going to start getting picked off one by one, and I was suddenly glad that I was surrounded by blondes because I wanted to live. Still, if it came down to it, I'd probably sacrifice myself for them…'probably' being the key word so I was definitely going to Hell…

"How far is it to the next town?" Dean asked her, the wheels turning in his head.

She turned to him. "It's about 40 miles down to Sidewinder."

"Alright, I'm gonna go down there and see if I can find some help. My partners will stick around and keep you guys safe." Dean said heading for the exit.

"Safe from what?" The Doctor asked.

"We'll get back to you on that." Dean told her, and then I hurried to him before he left and I reached out, grabbing his jacket.

"Hey…" I said softly.

Dean turned around. "Yeah?"

"Please be careful." I whispered lovingly.

He smiled and kissed me softly. "I will be…you too, all right?"

"Of course. I mean, when am I not careful?" I asked with a smile, kissing him again because I really felt like I had to.

Dean chuckled a little, and then I let go of him and waved a little as he took off in his car, going back inside. The doctor was examining a sample of Mr. Tanner's blood under a microscope and I was actually genuinely interested. It made me smile because Sam was interested in it too, and so I stepped up close to them and decided to be part of the conversation and try and do some detective work of my own.

"What?" Sam asked as the doctor made a noise while looking at the blood sample.

She made a face. "His lymphocyte percentage is pretty high. His body was fighting off a viral infection."

"Really? What kind of virus?" Sam asked as I looked at the sample.

"I can't say for sure." She answered.

"Do you think an infection could have made him act like that?" Sam asked.

"None of I've ever heard of. I mean some can cause dementia, but not that kind of violence. And besides, I've never heard of one that did this to the blood." She said.

I nodded and looked at her. "There's sulfur residue…if this is a disease…you don't think that it could be passed through the blood do you? When we found Jake and Mr. Tanner, they were standing over Mrs. Tanner…and they went through a lot of trouble to bleed on her wound…"

The Doctor nodded at me and hurried to talk to Mrs. Tanner about the theory as it all started to come together for me. This was definitely the work of a demon—possibly the Yellow-Eyed one—and I desperately needed to figure out how to stop this…but how did a stop a demon virus?

"Oh, my God. You don't think I've got this virus, do you?" Beverly asked in a scared voice.

The Doctor swallowed. "Beverly, I don't know what to think but with your permission, we'll take a blood sample."

Beverly slowly laid her hand on the doctor's but suddenly, she hit her and then she hit Sam, sending him against the wall. I used a spell to put a force field around her as she went at him with a scalpel in her hand, and after she hit the force field, she decided to come at me. Sam came towards her with a fire extinguisher so I let the force field down, Sam knocking her out and coming straight over to me, then going for the Doctor when I nodded and let him know I was good.

"Are you okay?" I asked the freaked out nurse.

She shook her head. "This is weird."

"I'm Lana." I told her, holding out my hand and trying to be friendly.

"I'm Pam." She replied, smiling a little.

I took a breath. "You seem a little on edge, Pam. Can I help you with anything?"

"I just—I really need to see if my boyfriend's okay." She said, and she was back in freak-out mode.

"Yeah, I wish I knew how my boyfriend was too." I told her with a knowing nod.

Pam looked at me like I was stupid as Sam neared us. "Yes, but mine could be in danger!"

"Hey, hey, hey, wait. Wait, please. Look, I know you're upset, alright? But it's safer if you stay here for now. Help is coming. There they are." He added as we heard the Impala.

"Sammy! Lanni! Open up!" Dean called to him.

Sam opened it and looked directly at Dean and not the man with him. "Did you guys get to a phone?"

"Roadblock," Dean replied and smiled a little when I held onto his jacket and looked him over worriedly for wounds.

"So you're all right?" I asked him and nodded when he kissed me and said he was fine, all of my attention now being able to be diverted to the big black man with Dean. "I'm Lana."

The man smiled at me when I extended my hand. "Sarge."

"Nice to meet you," I told him.

He nodded at that and I let go of Dean with my other hand, but still felt the need to be close to him at all times. If we were all going to get stuck here and die, then I wanted to be with the men that I loved most in the world and that was that. Besides, once upon a time I had told Dean I was never letting him go off by himself again, and I'd just broken that threat/promise…never again.

"Hey, Sarge, could you go on in there for a moment so that I can talk to my partners?" Dean asked.

Sarge nodded and left the boys and me alone, which was good because the three of us had some definite things to talk over and we all knew it. There was something big going on outside and Dean had definitely _not_ been gone long enough to have gotten into the next town so Sam and I needed to know what was happening beyond these walls. On top of that, Dean needed to know that we were dealing with a demonic virus.

"What's going on out there, Dean?" Sam asked him.

Dean shook his head. "Man, I don't know. I feel like Chuck Heston in 'The Omega Man'. Sarge is the only sane person I could find. What are we dealing with? Do you know?"

"Yeah, Doc thinks it's a virus." Sam said his hands on his hips.

Dean sighed at that. "Okay, great. What do you think?"

"I think she and Lana are right." Sam replied with a nod.

"Really?" Dean asked him. "Wait…Lanni?"

I smiled at him. "It's cute that you sound a little turned on by my possible knowledge of biological things. Little tidbit you didn't know about me: when I quit college, I was working on nursing. Anyway, I think the infected are trying to infect others with blood-to-blood contact. Oh, but it gets better—the virus leaves traces of sulfur in the blood."

"A demonic virus?" Dean asked a little fear in his voice.

"Yeah, more like demonic germ warfare—at least it explains why I've been having visions." Sam said with a sigh.

Dean nodded at him. "It's like a biblical plague."

"Yeah, you don't know how right you are, Dean. I've been pouring through Dad's journal—I found something about the Roanoke colony." Sam explained to him.

"And?" Dean asked impatiently.

"Dad always had a theory about 'Croatoan'. He thought it was a demon's name…sometimes known as Daeva or sometimes as Reshef …a demon of plague and pestilence." Sam explained to him.

Dean groaned loudly. "Well, that's terrific. Why here? Why now?"

"We have no idea, but Sam and I are worried about it. Who knows how far this thing can spread? We've got to get out of here, and we've got to warn people." I told him.

Sarge called us as Dean took that into account and nodded, so we went back inside and stood face to face with him. He confirmed our fears—Mrs. Tanner was definitely infected and this was definitely some kind of demonic plague. There had to be a reason behind this…there had to be a reason other than some kind of rather entertaining chaos for the demon to be involved in.

Plus—yet again, I might add—I felt connected and responsible.

"We've got to take care of this." Sarge said assertively. "We can't just leave her in there. My neighbors, they were strong. The longer we wait, the stronger she'll get."

As Sarge said this, Dean grabbed his gun and Pam made a face at them. She was really _not_ on board with any of this and I was trying really hard not to feel weak suddenly. I was Alana Meckenzie, and I was a hunter…so why the Hell was I starting to feel so helpless and so distraught? Innocent people were dying, sure, but I knew that this had to be done before more people were infected and yet I was still tensing up just because they were still people to me…even if they were now demonic beings. Maybe…maybe it was because _I _was demonic and this was scaring me.

It wasn't just Dean's aversion to anything demonic either. It was more importantly that maybe I could become like these people that were getting infected with this stupid demon virus. Perhaps once I finally got a hold of my mother and I tapped into my demon side I would become something that Dean would have to kill…I could never do that to him. Never…never, ever.

"You're gonna kill Beverly Tanner?" Pam asked them suddenly.

Sam looked at the Doctor. "Doctor, could there be any treatment? Some kind of cure for this?"

"Can you cure it?" Dean insisted, not wanting to shoot Mrs. Tanner either.

"For God's sake, I don't even know what 'it' is." She answered.

Sarge intervened as everyone looked around at each other. "I told you, it's a matter of time before she breaks through."

"Just leave her in there. You can't shoot her like an animal." Pam told us.

But Sam and Dean went towards the door even after she'd said that, and I took a seat on the floor. This wasn't the way I wanted to spend my time—I didn't want to shoot her. I didn't want to kill people that had this demon virus—there had to be a cure…there just had to be. I hurried to the microscope and looked at the sample, but I soon heard a gunshot…it was times like this that I just needed Jen.

I looked up as Dean came over to me and took a breath, stepping closer to me as I stood up and tried to face him. He opened his mouth to say something but then shut it again, and I just nodded and tried not to be so sad, but I hated jobs like this—the ones where I felt attached, conflicted and helpless. To top it off, I was missing Jen so much, and if this was the end, then I wanted to be in contact with her.

Just this morning on the way, Jen had told me that she thought that she had felt the babies move and I had smiled because it was surreal. I had at least felt my baby move before it had been taken away from me and now Jen was going through the motions and pretty sure she would know more than I would because she would actually get to experience it. Jen was getting to spend time with Kevin and prepare for a family, and she was probably worried sick that now Sam, Dean and me were _completely _cut off from her. She would know something was wrong, but she wouldn't know what, and she wouldn't know where to begin to make anything better…I wanted Jen.

"How do you do this?" I asked as he wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead. "I try to be as strong as you, but I just can't seem to do it."

Dean brushed his lips across my forehead in thought. "It's hard, but I know it has to be done."

"I wish I had your bravery." I responded, and then looked up into his eyes and smiled a little. "Did I tell you that Jen can feel the babies move?"

"Yeah, you were gushing about it earlier—you think it's girls, right?" Dean asked me, knowing I needed the mood lightened.

I nodded at him and pulled him closer to me as he wiped a couple of fallen tears off of my cheeks—he knew me so well. How there could _ever_ be a doubt in my mind as to where I belonged I would never know…I belonged with Dean. It was in everything he said to me…in the way that he spoke to me…in the way that he held me…comforted me…protected me…_loved_ me. I loved Dean Winchester with all of my heart.

"You need to get your weapons ready. If we have to kill more of them, we need to be ready for it." I told him slowly.

Dean nodded in agreement. "All right, but promise me you'll keep trying to find a cure."

I kissed him softly my lips brushing across his as I spoke next, our eyes locked. "I promise."

xx

A little while later, I was hitting dead end after dead end and it was driving me absolutely crazy because I couldn't find anything. We had no idea what we were dealing with or how to stop it, but one thing was for sure: this was big and it was bad and we needed to be ready to fight for our lives. We all looked up as we heard the sound of broken glass, but it was just Pam breaking some tubes containing blood in them…yeah cause _that_ was a good sign…I was starting to think that God hated me.

"Why are we staying here?" Pam asked us. "Can't we leave?"

Dean shook his head. "They're everywhere."

"She's right about one thing: we can't stay here. We've got to get out of here, get to the Roadhouse—somewhere—let people know what's coming." Sam explained.

"Yeah, that's a good point. 'Night of the Living Dead' didn't exactly end pretty." Dean told us and smiled at me when I got the reference and nodded in agreement, trying not to laugh too hard.

"I'm not sure we've got the choice," Sarge intervened. "Lots of folks up here are good with rifles. Even with all your hardware, we're easy targets. So, unless you've got some explosives…"

"We could make some." Sam retorted after seeing the chemical products on the shelf.

Suddenly, somebody knocked on the door and asked to be let in and I swallowed—another sign that could _not_ be good. Sarge recognized the voice as that of Duane Tanner and opened it to him, Dean starting to shift rather uncomfortably and I nodded slowly as Sam's eyes went wide—Sam recognized him which meant only one thing…

"That's the guy that I..." Dean asked Sam who nodded.

"Duane, where you been?" Sarge asked him.

"I was on a fishing trip up by Roslyn—I came back this afternoon. I saw Roger McGill being dragged out of his house by people we know. They started cutting him with knives. I ran. I've been hiding in the woods ever since. Has anybody seen my mom and dad?" Duane asked aloud.

"Awkward," Dean whispered to us.

"You're bleeding?" The Doctor asked noticing the cut on Duane's leg.

Dean went alert and looked at him. "Where did you get that?"

"I was running…I must have tripped." Duane answered him.

"Tie him up—there's rope in there." Dean told Sarge.

"Wait," Duane protested.

"Sit down!" Dean ordered Duane, taking aim at him.

I closed my eyes for a moment and tried to remind myself that we didn't know what was going on here and we had to be on the safe side. If Duane _was_ infected, the rest of us were in danger, but if he really _had_ just tripped and gotten scratched than we were fine. Still…I didn't like the vibes that I was getting off of him…he seemed vaguely familiar to me even though I knew I didn't _know_ him and it was definitely annoying me.

"Sorry, Duane…he's right. We've got to be careful." Sarge explained to him, and I could tell he was upset to have to do this to him.

Duane was confused. "Careful? About what?"

"Did they bleed on you?" Dean questioned him.

"No. What the Hell? No!" Duane cried, suddenly much more scared than he had been.

"Doc, any way to know for sure? Any test?" Sam asked her.

She looked at him. "I've studied Beverly's blood work backwards and forwards with Lana."

"My mom?" Duane asked as I opened my eyes and took a breath.

"It took three hours for the virus to incubate." The Doctor added. "Sulfur didn't appear in the blood until then, so, no…there'd be no way of knowing. Not until after Duane...turns."

I swallowed before I spoke up. "Unfortunately, I can't think of anything else to do about it…we're going to have to wait this out…keep him restrained."

"Dean, I've got to talk to you…_now_." Sam said, and I followed them out of the room as Sarge was about to tie up Duane. "This is my vision, Dean. It's happening."

"Yeah, I figured." Dean replied curtly.

"You can't kill him, alright? Not yet. We don't know if he's infected or not." Sam told him.

Dean gave Sam a look. "Oh, I think we're pretty damn sure. Guy shows up out of nowhere, got a cut on his leg. His whole family is infected."

"Alright then we should keep him tied up, and we should wait and see." I suggested, because I didn't want to kill Duane anymore than Sam did.

"For what? For him to hulk out, infect somebody else? No, thanks—can't take that chance. Hey look, guys, I'm not happy about this, ok? But it's a tough job, and you know that." Dean told us firmly.

I bit my lip and Sam and I exchanged looks as we took in what Dean said—we got it, we did, but this just didn't feel right. I mean I was having bad vibes about the guy, but not all of my bad vibes meant people had to die…just meant that people were involved. If Duane _wasn't_ infected—and there was _still_ a chance that he wasn't—there was still something dark about him and I needed to figure out what that was too.

"It's supposed to be tough, Dean. We're supposed to struggle with this, that's the whole point." I told him sadly with a sigh.

Dean turned to me. "What does that buy us?"

"A clear conscience, for one." Sam replied and he and Dean made eye contact.

"It's too late for that." Dean informed him.

"What the Hell has happened to you?" Sam asked him as I went to put my face in my hands.

Dean raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"You might kill an innocent man, and you don't even care. You don't act like yourself anymore, Dean. Hell, you know what? You're acting like one of those things out there." Sam told him and Dean threw him out of the way and left the room, locking the door behind him, Sam pounding on it as I felt the urge to cry again.

"Hey! Open the damn door. Dean! Don't do it, Dean! Don't!" Sam cried out to him.

I looked at Sam and I sighed, leaning against him for support as all of the information ran through my head. Demonic virus…whacked out civilians…blood to blood transfer…it was like starting a war…it was like the beginning of the end. Now Dean could potentially kill a man that wasn't infected at all, and it was going to be on his conscience if he went through with it.

"Maybe what you said got through to him." I told Sam hopefully.

Sam rested his head on mine. "Maybe it's what drove him to kill Duane in the first place."

I bit my lip and put one of my arms around Sam, him kissing the top of my head and then we both looked up when Dean came out. There had been no gunshot—he hadn't shot Duane and I was proud of him…Sam had gotten through to him. He didn't seem to want to talk about it though, he just had Sam and I help him with making explosives so we could survive a battle, and then I started to sense something…something was wrong.

"It's been over four hours. Duane's blood is still clean. I don't think he's infected…I'd like to untie him, if that's alright." She asked us.

"Sure…yeah," Sam answered, and she left with a nod. "You know I'm gonna ask you why."

Dean nodded at him as I looked at them. "Yeah, I know."

"So, why? Why didn't you do it?" Sam asked him as I smiled a little—good ol' Sammy.

"We need more alcohol." Dean answered changing the subject.

"Look…I don't trust Duane. He might not be infected, but I think he might be bad…" I began, knowing I should have said something before when Dean gave me that look—that look that was pretty much saying, 'how dare you not tell me that before?'.

I looked up as I heard a click, and frowned since the door had obviously been locked and it all clicked—that blood thing before had _definitely_ been a bad sign. Pan as clumsy enough to have cut herself with one of the broken tubes and never told anyone, and now she was on one side of the door with Sam, and Dean and I were on the other—like a bad zombie movie. I was suddenly feeling panicked and _very _scared, and all I wanted was my Sammy—why was this all happening to us _now_?

We heard the scuffle on the other side of the door and Dean went to kick it down, getting into the room and killing Pam. It was just a reflex for him too—she'd attacked Sam, and now she was paying with her blood. Hell even _I_ wasn't flinching at it…that in itself was a little disconcerting for me, but then again I knew that if I was faced with it as an option, I would kill for Sam and Dean in a heartbeat. Dean went to help Sam to stand, but Sarge got in his way and I glared at him—oh, Hell no!

"She bled on him. He's got the virus." Sarge warned us.

I looked at Sam painfully. "No…no…"

We all crowded around Sam as we got him to sit on the exam table, and Dean was riled up—this was his brother. Hell, _I_ was feeling riled up too because I could _not_ lose Sam! When I had asked for a hunt to bring the three of us closer together, I hadn't meant to bring us closer together because we knew it was the end! I hadn't even told them about my father, or about what I was looking for to kill Chelsea with…

"Doctor, check his wound again, would you?" Dean asked her and then got a little hostile when she paused. "Doctor!"

Sarge stepped in. "What does she need to examine him for? You saw what happened."

"Did her blood actually enter your wound?" The Doctor asked Sam.

"Come on, of course it did!" Sarge shouted at them.

"We don't know that for sure." Dean retorted with a nasty look thrown Sarge's way.

"We can't take a chance." Duane intervened and I swear Dean's eyes looked dangerous now as everyone started to talk to him about it all.

Sarge nodded in agreement with Duane. "You know what we have to do."

"Nobody is shooting my brother." Dean said strongly.

"He's not gonna be your brother much longer, you said it yourself." Duane told him.

Dean shook his head firmly. "Nobody's shooting anyone."

"You were gonna shoot me!" Duane reminded him.

"You shut your pie hole or I still might." Dean told him.

I waved my hands around. "All right, just everybody calm the fuck down!"

"Dean, they're right. I'm infected. Just give me the gun, and I'll do it myself." Sam told him slowly.

"Forget it," I answered and everyone looked at me again. "We're not letting that happen and I think you know me well enough to know what happens when I've set my mind to something. Besides, Kate would kick my ass. Now if you'd all just shut the fuck up so I could think and figure out how to get us _all_ out of this alive, I would be incredibly appreciative, all right?"

Dean smiled at me a little for being on his side, but at the same time I knew he wasn't really up to smiling. Everyone was against us because they didn't want Sam to turn and kill us all, and I knew we couldn't blame them, but at the same time there was no way in _Hell_ that we were killing Sam. We were _all_ going to get out of this and if I could possibly figure out some kind of 'witchy' way to get us out, then even better…maybe a demonic way, but only if I had to.

"She's right," Dean agreed with a nod.

Sam shook his head. "Lan, Dean, I'm not gonna become one of those things."

"Sam, we've still got some time." Dean told him.

"Time for what?" Sarge asked out loud. "Look, I understand he's your brother, and I'm sorry, I am, but I've got to take care of this."

"I'm gonna say this one time. You make a move on him, you'll be dead before you hit the ground. You understand me? Do I make myself clear?" Dean asked, scared and angry all at once.

"Dean!" Sam chastised.

I shook my head. "No, Sam…I agree with Dean this time. I swear to God if you're opening your mouth to shout at me Sarge, you're going to be in a whole new world of hurt in a minute." I told him and he shut his mouth, his eyes blazing into mine as I continued to speak. "All of you need to get the Hell out of here. If Sam is going to die here…then Dean and I are staying behind."

"Take my car." Dean added. "You've got the explosives. There's an arsenal in there. You two go with him. You got enough firepower to handle anything now."

"Dean, Lana…no. No, go _with_ them. This is your only chance…Lan you can't give up like this." Sam pleaded with me. "Dean…Dean you can't do this."

Dean smiled at him sadly. "You're not gonna get rid of me that easy."

"Me neither," I added, nodding to show him that I was _not_ leaving without him.

"Lana…go." Dean said suddenly.

I looked at him suddenly and I found my mouth going dry—had he _seriously_ just said that to me? There was _no way in Hell_ I was leaving him and Sam here to die! I was standing by them no matter what—it was like they didn't even know me. They were my boys, and if they were going to die here, then I was going to die here whether that was selfish of me or not.

"No," I told him, shaking my head firmly. "There's no way in Hell that I'm leaving."

Dean gave me a look. "I do _not_ want you here for this."

"I don't care." I told him slowly. "I am _not_ leaving you two."

"Leave!" Dean yelled, and the moment our eyes met, I could see the pain in them.

I was in love with him, and I knew he was in love with me and he was just trying to do what he thought was best for me, but this wasn't what I wanted. Of course I didn't want Sam to die, but I definitely didn't want to leave Sam and Dean to die…I _had_ to be with them in the end. I couldn't leave them now…I couldn't leave them _ever_.

"Don't tell me to leave again!" I told him firmly, taking a step towards him. "This is not your decision, this is _mine_! If you two are going to stay here and meet your fate, then so am I!"

Dean sighed loudly. "Damn-it Lana, what about Jen?"

"Jen can get along without me. She and Kevin have each other…she and Kevin are going to have babies in like 5 months. I told him with a shrug. "She has her family, and she can get along without me."

"You're being selfish!" Dean roared.

"So are you, you stupid bastard!" I exclaimed.

Dean whirled on me. "Lanni, I won't let you do this."

I hated that he thought that he could seriously order me out of here, and my eyes went from his to Sam's, and Sam's traveled from mine to looking at Dean. There was something else behind all of this…there was another reason for Dean to want to just up and quit like this. Didn't we have other options? We _had _to have other options!

"What's wrong, Dean? What's _really_ wrong?" Sam asked him.

Dean sighed and looked at me, gently taking me by the face and looking me in the eye. "I want you to _live_, Lanni. I want you to go out there all right, and go with them. I love you, and I want you to move on with your life if it comes down to me leaving—Baby, I can't be the reason that you get killed."

"Dean, I can't live without you." I told him, the tears coming as he poured his heart out to me in front of everyone. "Damn-it, you selfish Bastard, I love you. I'm not walking out those doors to try and live without you when I don't have to."

"As touching as that is, Lana, he's right." Sarge explained to me. "Come with us."

I kept my eyes on Dean's and shook my head, trying to ignore the pain that crossed Dean's beautiful hazel irises. It was hurting him that he couldn't force me to save myself, but at the same time I knew that he loved me…knew that this was who I was, and he still loved me even though I wasn't listening to him. He would still love me if I left with Sarge, Duane and the Doctor, but I wasn't going to do that…it would go against everything I was about and Dean knew I was standing by my decision just as he was standing by his.

"I'm staying with them." I told him.

"Okay, it's your funeral," Sarge said sadly and he nodded at me when Dean let go of me and I finally looked over at the three of them by the door.

The Doctor smiled at us softly. "I'm sorry…thanks for everything, Marshals."

"Oh, actually, we're not really marshals." Dean answered and he locked the door behind her. "I wish we had a deck of cards or a foosball table or something." He said once we were alone in the room.

"Dean, don't do this. Just get the Hell out of here, and take Lan with you." Sam told him.

Dean shook his head. "No way—you heard us, Sammy…you're stuck with us."

"Give me my gun and leave." Sam told him firmly.

"For the last time, Sam, no." I said, walking over to him and taking his hand. "We're staying with you and you have to get over that."

Sam sighed loudly. "This is the dumbest thing you've ever done—either of you."

"I don't know about that…remember that waitress in Tampa?" Dean asked him and grunted when I elbowed him softly.

"And for me, I mean, there was getting Chelsea turned." I added, kissing Sam's hand absent-mindedly.

"Dean, I'm sick. It's over for me…it doesn't have to be for you and Lan." Sam explained to us. "You guys can keep going…keep fighting…Hell you two can settle down if you want to and I wouldn't be around to stop you."

I looked at him. "Don't you _dare_ try to make yourself sound like a hindrance, Samuel Winchester."

Dean swallowed down the lump in his throat at the pain in my voice and then looked at Sam as Sam looked at me and made eye contact. I couldn't lose Sam like this…not like this…and I definitely couldn't lose him like this _and_ have to hear him make himself out to be a reason why Dean and I weren't settled. Dean didn't _want_ to be settled and I respected that…and I was vowing right then to _never_ let Sam be the third wheel again.

"I'm tired, Sam. I'm tired of this job...this life...this weight on my shoulders, Man, I'm tired of it." Dean explained to him.

I nodded at that. "It's gotten to be just that much more tiring as the days have gone on."

"So, what? So, you're just gonna give up? I mean, you're just gonna lay down and die? Lan, you have a whole other life to go to." Sam tried, turning to me again, "damn-it."

I smiled a sad smile. "Sammy, I've lived that life. Jenny is happy—she has Kevin, and she'll have babies, and without me her life is even _more _demon-free. You know what else? In _my_ moment of need, I found you two…and I can't live without you guys, and I don't want too. You really have to just accept that if this is the end…I want to be with the two of you…I want to go out _with_ the two of you."

"Look, Dean, I know this stuff with Dad had…" Sam began, knowing he wasn't going to talk me out of it now…but he still thought he could talk _Dean_ out of it.

Dean shook his head. "You're wrong. It's not about Dad. I mean, part of it is, sure…"

"Then, what is it about?" Sam asked him but there was a knock on the door and I reached out and opened it.

"You'd better come see this." The Doctor said.

Sam, Dean and I exchanged looks but followed her, and when we got outside, we found that the whole place was deserted and it seemed that everyone had disappeared. Duane, Sarge and the Doctor were in no immediate danger anymore, so we all stayed around for a few more hours and then the Doctor looked at Sam after looking at his blood samples. Her face was definitely miffed, but it was good news and I let out a sigh of relief right before she even _gave_ us the good news.

"Well, it's been five hours and your blood's still clean. I don't understand it, but I think you dodged a bullet." She explained to him.

Sam made a face. "But I was exposed. How could I not be infected?"

"I don't know, but you're just not. I mean, when you compare it with the Tanner samples…what the Hell?" She asked aloud.

"What?" Sam answered her.

"Their blood…there's no trace of the virus. No sulfur…nothing." She replied and I went to look over the samples too and she was right…it was like this had never even happened except for the dead and the completely deserted town.

So we all hung around for a while and then the next morning, Sarge and Duane were going to leave town and offered for the Doctor to go with them, but she wanted to warn Sidewinder and the authorities. It seemed like everything that had happened here had somehow been erased, but at the same time none of us were going to be able to erase this from our minds…and Duane still felt off to me…what if Sarge was in danger?

"What about him?" Dean asked the Doctor, pointing to Sam.

She smiled at him. "He's gonna be fine. No signs of infection."

"Hey, man, don't look at me. I've got no clue." Sam said as we went to the car and looked at each other, leaving the others behind…me still glancing over at Sarge and Duane until they drove off.

"I don't trust that Duane kid in the slightest…maybe Dean should have shot him." I said softly, hoping they hadn't heard me, but kind of hoping that they did.

"I swear, I'm gonna lose sleep over this one. I mean, why here? Why now? Where the Hell did everybody go? It's not like they just freaking melted." Dean told us and I nodded.

Sam nodded too and then swallowed. "Why was I immune?"

"Yeah, you know what? That's a good question. You know, I'm already starting to feel like this is the one that got away." Dean answered, and then we got into the car and left town and all I could think about was Sam and the virus.

I knew why _I_ would have been immune but _Sam_ was immune. Did it have something to do with him being psychic? What did him being psychic mean? I put my headphones in my ears as we headed out of town and thanked God that I hadn't had a chance to potentially become infected…my father was a demon, which made me half demon and because of that…I was immune to a whole damn lot.

**Note: So that was intense and kind of revealing for Lana without her saying anything out loud…you guys are smart. Before it's all completely revealed I'm sure you'll figure out what the darkest part of her past is. Side note: 27 pages! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	11. Finally on the Same Page

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This chapter kind of…it leads up to some foreshadowing, so pay attention.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

After getting some sleep at the motel, the boys offered a beer and a look at the lake, and I nodded. It was about time the three of us just kind of hung out and looked out at the lake, and I knew that something was going to ruin our moments together, but for now, we were all pretty all right. There was still talking about what had happened on our plates, and I knew Sam would want to discuss it…okay…I was looking less and less forward to this outing by the minute.

"It's beautiful out here, isn't it?" I asked them, leaning on the railing by the lake and sipping my beer.

Sam and Dean nodded slowly, standing next to me—Dean in the middle—and taking sips of their beer too. The Impala was close to us and when I looked back at the boys I knew our talk was about to begin and I still hadn't even called Jen. I needed to check in with her, Kevin and Kate, and I needed to come clean to Sam and Dean about _everything_…it seemed that everything was starting to get a little bit darker.

"So, last night…you want to tell me what the Hell you were talking about?" Sam asked Dean and me.

"What do you mean?" Dean replied, sipping his beer.

Sam wasn't impressed. "What do I mean? I mean, you said you were tired of the job and that it wasn't just because of Dad…and you gave up."

I opened my mouth to say something, but then shut it and slowly sipped my beer again when he had added the last part and looked directly at _me_. Dean and I _had_ pretty much given up and I needed to explain about my demonic ties…I needed to tell them about Chelsea and what I needed to do to kill her—which I still didn't know myself. Before I could start off though, Dean had already taken over the conversation…mostly.

Dean looked at him. "Forget it."

Sam shook his head. "No, I can't—no way."

"Oh man, I thought we were all gonna die. You can't hold that over me." Dean told him with a shrug.

"No, no, no, no. You can't pull that crap with me, man. You're talking—you both are." Sam said and I knew he wasn't backing down from this.

"And what if I don't?" Dean asked.

Sam looked at him. "Then I guess I'll just have to keep asking until you do."

"I don't know, man. I just think maybe we ought to...go to the Grand Canyon." Dean suggested and I turned to him.

"What?" Sam and I asked.

I knew that Dean was telling the truth when he was saying he was tired of hunting—Hell, I'd been there a time or two—but something _else_ was bringing this on. Dean wouldn't be saying these things if something wasn't bothering him and I suddenly felt a little upset…why hadn't he talked to _me_ about what was bothering him? Then again…my keeping secrets had probably proved to him that he didn't _have_ to tell me anything…and I couldn't fault him for keeping things to himself when I was still hoarding two _incredibly_ big secrets of my own.

"Yeah! You know all this driving back and forth across the country…do you know I've never been to the Grand Canyon? Or we could go to T.J. or Hollywood, see if we could bang Lindsay Lohan." Dean suggested and immediately he reached his hand out for mine.

"Gag me," I said as Dean rested his hand on mine to reassure me that he was just trying to get us to go on a vacation—thank God…there were _much_ better actresses to bang than Lindsay Lohan…like Kate Beckinsale or Emily Van de Camp—even _I_ would go for Emily Van de Camp.

"You're not making any sense." Sam pointed out.

"I just say we should take a break from all this. Why do we got to get stuck with all the responsibility, you know? Why can't we live life a little bit?" Dean asked with a shrug.

Sam was confused. "Why are you saying all this? No, no, no, no, no, Dean. You're my brother, alright? So, whatever weight you're carrying, let me help a little bit."

"I can't. I promised." Dean said softly.

"Who?" I asked him, squeezing his hand.

Dean took a breath. "Dad."

It was then that I was pretty certain that even though Dean had said that John hadn't told him anything before he died, Dean had lied. John had told Dean something and whatever he had told him was really weighing heavily on Dean. Now he couldn't take it anymore, and he was trying to hide behind other things so he wouldn't have to talk about it—but Dean really needed to talk about it and that was that.

"What are you talking about?" Sam asked him in a slightly scared voice.

Dean swallowed and squeezed my hand. "Right before Dad died...he told me something—something about you."

"What?" Sam asked him and continued when a pause followed and Dean said nothing. "Dean, what did he tell you?"

"He said that he…that he wanted me to watch out for you. Take care of you." Dean explained to him.

Sam smiled a little like he was relieved. "He's told you that a million times."

"Yeah, Baby—he told me to take of you two as well." I added with a smile, running my thumb along his hand.

"Nah, this time it was different." Dean told Sam and me, shaking his head. "He said that I had…that I had to save you."

Sam took a breath. "Save me from what?"

"He just said that I had to save you." Dean explained, slightly frazzled. "And if I couldn't I'd have to…"

"Have to what, Dean?" Sam asked as I squeezed Dean's hand because he was hurt and it visibly showed.

Dean looked like he was really having a lot of trouble trying to get the words out, and I swallowed because he looked so pained. What could John have _possibly_ had to say to Dean that would have him _this_ broken-hearted? Why did I suddenly feel like things were about to get _really_ ugly?

"I'd have to kill you." Dean said, and he started to get even sadder. "He said that I might have to kill you, Sammy."

"Kill me?" Sam asked, and we were all suddenly faced with almost crying. "What the Hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know." Dean admitted, as Sam got hysterical about it all and I couldn't blame him about that…at all.

"I mean he must have had some kind of reason for saying it, right? Did he know the demon's plans for me? Am I supposed to go Dark side? What else did he tell you, Dean?" He asked hostilely.

"Nothing, that's it—I swear." Dean replied and I took a breath.

This was just the thing that the three of us needed to add to our pile of drama—note my sarcasm. Everything definitely _was_ getting darker, and if we were going to get through this, then we had to do it together. There was just no other way to do this…we _had_ to have each other's backs, and there was just no other way to do it.

"How could you not have told me this?" Sam yelled at him.

Dean took a breath. "Because it was Dad, and he begged me not to."

"Who cares? Take some responsibility for yourself Dean! You had no right to keep this from me!" Sam screamed, getting in Dean's face.

I let go of Dean's hand and ran my fingers through my hair, blowing air out of my mouth and resting my hands on the railing. How could John have said something like that about Sam? How could he have said something like that and left Dean to hold it on his shoulders like that? What was John thinking?

"You think I wanted this?" Dean asked angrily. "Huh? I wish to God he'd never opened his mouth! Then I wouldn't have to walk around with this screaming in my head all day!"

"We just gotta figure this all out then. Figure out what the Hell it all means." Sam said, having walked away from us a little, and Dean looked out over the water with me.

"We do? I've been thinking about this. I think we should just lay low. You know? At least for a while…it'd be safer," Dean suggested, "and that way I could make sure that…"

"What? That I don't turn evil? That I don't turn into some kind of killer?" Sam asked.

I looked directly at Sam. "He never said that, Sammy."

"Geeze, if you're not careful, Dean, you _will_ have to waste me one day!" Sam cried and I knew he was hurting too.

"I never said that! Damn-it, Sam! This whole thing is spinning out of control! All right? You're immune to some weirdo demon virus, and I don't even know what the Hell anymore." Dean retorted loudly. "And you're pissed at me. I get it. That's fine, I deserve it, but we lay low until we figure out our next move, okay?"

"Forget it." Sam said, chugging some beer.

"Sam, please, man." Dean told him, touching his arm. "Hey! Please. Just give me some time. Give me some time to think, man. Please. Please."

Sam nodded, and we all went back to the motel and then Sam went straight to bed. I snuggled up with Dean and smiled as he stroked my hair as I listened to his heartbeat, resting my head on his chest. It was nice to lay there with him like that, but at the same time, I was kind of worried because there was something else on his mind and I wasn't sure what was going on completely yet.

"You could have told me that stuff." I whispered to him, running my fingers along his shirt. "I could have helped to take some of the load off."

Dean shook his head. "It wouldn't have been right to burden you with it before I had even thought of telling Sam."

I kissed his shirted chest and looked up at him, kissing his chest again and trying to let him know that I was there for him. Mostly I just wanted Dean to confide in me, but I couldn't expect that when I hadn't confided all of my secrets in him either. It was one of those moments when I just wanted to make everything better, but I didn't know how to.

"Hey…look at me." I said, and Dean slowly looked at me as I got up on my arm a bit. "Sammy isn't just going to go evil. I know that I haven't really been the 'poster child' for honesty, but you can tell me anything…and I can tell _you_ anything…I think that's what scares me. I mean on the one hand I know that you'll stand by me, but on the other hand I feel like the more you know about me, the more you're going to question everything and I know that's not fair to you, and I'm sorry."

Dean stroked my hair and then ran his fingers along my arms. "Lanni, you gotta talk things out with me, all right?"

"Yeah…I know…but you gotta do the same with me." I told him and then took a breath. "Your Dad said something about _me_…didn't he? It wasn't _just_ about Sam, was it?"

"No," Dean admitted and then closed his eyes. "He's worried about you…he's worried about you double-crossing Sam and I, but I don't know why."

I nodded at him. "Well I do."

I opened my mouth to finally come clean about my real father, but Dean kissed me and I had a feeling that this was going to be harder than I thought. Dean knew that I wanted to come clean about things, but after the fight with Sam, he wanted to shut down on feelings for a while. I really couldn't blame him, but bit my lip when he pulled back and looked at me with serious eyes.

"Promise me that you'll never just up and leave me, Lanni." He said as he ran his fingers through my hair and looked me in the eye.

I smiled at him and nodded. "I promise, Dean, that you're completely and utterly stuck with me no matter what."

"Good," Dean told me genuinely, cupping my face and stroking my cheek. "I'm kind of glad you're here."

"Just kind of?" I asked him back, kissing him softly. "I'm kind of glad you're here with me too, for the record."

I kissed him one more time, and then smiled when I rested my head on his chest again, and he held me close to him. We both fell asleep rather peacefully in each other's arms, and I woke up first the next morning, no Sam in sight. I smiled a little, hoping that this meant maybe he was at breakfast, and that gave Dean and me maybe an hour and a half….but only if we played our cards right.

"Dean…" I whispered, kissing him softly as he slept. "Wake up and play with me."

Dean turned over, facing away from me, and so I pressed my body up against his backside, and ran my hands along his body. He was awake, and yet not awake at the same time, and the last time we were both awake and in a motel room like this, we hadn't gotten to get anywhere. Still, Sam was gone, so it wasn't like we'd be trying to go at it with him only a couple of feet away from us—so this was a win this time.

"You know anything fun we can do in an hour by ourselves?" I asked in a whisper, kissing his back through his shirt and then nipping at him with my teeth playfully.

"By ourselves?" Dean asked, suddenly alert.

I laughed and nodded. "Completely and utterly alone…"

Dean turned over and I smiled as he did, laughing a little more because just the prospect of sex had his eyes all a-twinkle. I adored the man lying next to me, and we definitely needed to get a move on if we were going to get this done. That wasn't really romantic, but at the same time, I honestly didn't know how long Sam had been gone already, which would definitely affect when he came back.

"Morning," he told me, stroking my hair.

I smiled at him. "Morning…"

"So…" Dean began, trailing off and leaning in.

"I was thinking—" I began with a playful look on my face, but his lips were suddenly on mine and I decided to just stop talking for once—hard for me, but needing to be done.

I let Dean control this step, allowing him to climb on top of me and deepen the kiss as he stroked my hair, resting his body against mine. It was so much more caring and meaningful than the other times, and as he moved the material of my nightgown up my legs slowly, I made a happy surprised noise, and he left a trail of kisses down to my neck, sucking on it, and then his mouth traveled down to my sternum, and he sucked there too, making me moan slightly. I just wanted him to be close to me, and I was glad that I had had him…I was glad that no matter what happened, we seemed to find our way to each other and we were content there.

"I love you," I whispered to him.

Dean smiled, and kissed my lips softly to signal he felt the same way, and then the tip of my tongue touched his lips and he smiled and parted his lips for me and my tongue explored his mouth before retreating back to my own, but before it got all the way back, Dean ran the tip of his along mine and then his retreated back to his own mouth. We made out for another minute or two without our tongues, and pulled away breathless. I smiled and then Dean ran his hands along my back and slowly began to slide his hand up my nightgown bodice and kissed me softly again.

We sat up a little as I removed his shirt, and then he slowly laid me down on the bed, and climbed on top of me. He kissed me softly, and then kissed my neck again, and began to suck on the same spot that he had before. Then he slowly began to slide my nightgown up and off of me, and we made eye contact, him running his nose along mine before his hand was on the move again, only this time it slide down between my legs and I bit my lips instead of gasping when I felt his fingers.

"Someone's acting all tough about her want." Dean said in a pretty sing-song voice, a smirk on his face.

I rolled my eyes as best as I could. "Someone's thinking a little too highly of himself."

"I think you know you want this…" Dean retorted with a wink.

I just bit my lip, but I made a noise when his fingers increased in tempo and soon just gave in and made the noises that he wanted me to make, and he made some of his own. Sex was just one of the other things that bonded us together, and afterwards we just lay there kissing one another and stroking each other's bare, damp skin. I nuzzled my nose against him and kissed his peck. Looking up at him as he ran his fingers through my hair and held me close.

"What do you want to do today?" I asked him softly.

He kissed me lovingly. "Just lie here."

"That can be done." I told him, kissing him again.

I knew that we _couldn't_ just lie there forever, but it was nice to know that he just wanted to be close to me. There were still things we needed to talk about, but for a while we just held each other close and stroked each others skin, and each other's hair, no words needed. We just needed each other and we were content enough with each other that we could just lay there under the covers with each other even though we knew our moment had to end eventually. I nuzzled his skin and then looked up at him again when he took a breath, and I knew he was going to say what we had _both_ been thinking.

"Do you think we should get dressed before Sam gets back?" Dean asked me.

I sighed and rested my forehead against his. "I guess so."

Dean nodded and kissed me tenderly, the two of us getting up and after a quick shower together, we got dressed. We weren't really hungry yet, so we just lay back down on the bed and cuddled some more, Dean kissing the top of my head. I reached out and I held his hand up to my face, kissing his fingers and then shaking my head as he started to tickle me because he knew all of my spots.

We were alone, but at the same time, if Sam walked in, Dean didn't want him to walk in on anything mushy. I had simply wanted to show him that I loved him and that I was glad to be so close to him these days, but I understood him. Laughing, I pushed on his chest and shot him a look when he pinned my hands above my head to the bed by my wrists, leaning down and giving me a rather stern look.

"You need to keep the touching to yourself." He told me.

I laughed and shrugged as much as I could. "Sorry, I can't promise that."

"We don't have time for another go." He replied immediately. "You're killing me."

"I'm seriously turning you on right now _that_ much? I am _so_ not reading you right at the moment." I laughed, and deliberately moved under him, pushing my hips up against him. "Oh, I'm sorry, is that _touching_?"

Dean tightened his grip on my wrists and grunted. "Woman, I'm _serious_."

"Sorry…it just felt…_good_." I said, doing it again and smirking as his handle on my wrists tightened just a little more. "Besides, you're kind of sexy when you're calling me, 'woman'…."

There was a little bit of lust in his eyes and he got off of me after a pause, and I pouted but he didn't look at me, he just sat up on the edge of the bed and I got up behind him and started to rub his shoulders. He was a little tense about it at first, but then I whispered that I was sorry, I was just horny, and he let me apologize by rubbing his shoulders and his back. Then when Sam didn't show up, we tried calling him, but we couldn't get a hold of him, and so we got in the car and started driving since we found a note from him that said he was taking off—and that was it. We sat in the car, and I took Dean's hand as he freaked out a little, his whole body tensed up and afraid.

"He's probably fine." I told him, squeezing his hand reassuringly. "He's just processing and he thinks he has to do that on his own for the moment."

Dean sighed as he nodded. "I promised, Lanni."

"And you'll keep your promise." I told him, kissing his hand and looking at him.

He smiled a little at me, and then his cell phone went off, and I looked at the cover and answered it since he was driving. It wasn't that he cared, but at the same time, I knew that if Ellen was going to talk to anyone about this, it was going to be me. She would have obliged Dean for his brother, but at the same time, she and I had an understanding and that was just the way that it was.

"Ellen, hey! Have you heard from Sam?" I asked her.

She took a breath. "He wanted to be on his own."

"Ellen, please—Sam and Dean had a bit of a fight and something bad could be going on and Dean promised he'd protect him—_I_ promised I would protect him." I pleaded with her.

"Well you know what, I think he's your family, and you have to protect your family." Ellen agreed with me. "He's in Indiana."

I smiled and wrote the name of the city down and the motel he was at, and then thanked her and hung up the phone, looking at Dean. He glanced at me, and then back at the road, apprehension in his eyes and it warmed and broke my heart all at the same time. Sam was truly his _everything_, and I thought that he was an amazing brother…an amazing person and I really wanted us to find Sam as soon as possible.

"He's in Indiana, so let's head here." I told him, handing him the piece of paper and then pulling out my own phone to call Jen after kissing his hand again. "I'll get directions from Jen."

He smiled at me, letting out a sigh of relief. "Or you could use a map."

"Good point—why interrupt them when I can look over a map?" I asked him.

He smiled at me and kissed my hand as well, us stopping for gas, and then for some food, driving until morning. We found the motel and we slowed down and looked through a window of a room with the curtains open. Thank God! Sam was there and he looked like he was safe and that was what mattered. I smiled and ran my fingers through Dean's hair as he looked at Sam with a smile on his face—he was so relieved that nothing bad had happened to Sam.

"Thank God, you're okay." Dean said aloud.

"You think we should go on in?" I asked him.

As Sam stepped away from the window, we saw a girl and Dean smirked. "You're better than okay. Sammy, you sly dog."

"It's probably not like that." I told him, elbowing him softly, and he smiled at me, glad I was there until there were gunshots that shattered the windows in the motel, and I frowned. "Gordon."

Dean gave me a look and I explained that I could sense him and got out of the car, Dean following me to where Gordon was with a sniper. Dean jumped at him and knocked him down to the ground, punching him in the face as I started to say an incantation. I had definitely been practicing, but at the same time I still needed to get better so I could just think and do something like I could do when I was a teenager.

"You do that to my brother, I'll kill you!" Dean cried, grabbing hold of his jacket hard.

"Dean, wait," Gordon said, but Dean continued to beat his face until Gordon hit him with the gun, and then held a can up to me as I went to shoot him with the fireball in my hand.

"Sweet dreams, Witch." Gordon said, and he sprayed something in my face, causing me to gag and fall over.

xx

When I woke up, I was tied to a chair, and I felt groggy, trying to get my bearings. I had no idea what was going on, but I remembered Gordon evading the fireball after knocking Dean out, and spraying me in the face...what the fuck did he spray me in the face with and how could I get untied when I couldn't feel my magic to kill him?

"What did you spray me with?" I asked him softly, freaking a little because I couldn't feel my magic…

"You sprayed her with something?" Dean asked angrily.

Gordon smiled at us. "I don't get what you see in each other, really. I mean don't you understand what she is, Dean?"

"What…did you spray me with?" I asked firmly again.

"It's a sort of…witch repellent. With a high enough dose, I could kill you, but the stuff I sprayed on will keep your powers down for a good few hours." Gordon explained with a shrug like it was nothing. "I've done my research."

I nodded at him, moving my hands against the ropes and trying to tap into my powers…why was this happening to me? My demon half should still have been helping me to have _some_ powers…I could feel a _little_ something…but what I wasn't sure of. I just needed to focus…just needed to focus…

"Besides, I needed you out, so there were some strong sleeping agents in it too." Gordon said with a smirk.

In fact I was trying to focus on my powers right then, not on Gordon, even when he was talking to Dean about what the plan was and giving us the address of where we were. I didn't feel so good and I wanted to kill him, looking at him with a look on my face that I reserved for truly terrible people…Gordon was a truly horrible person. Then Dean's phone rang and Gordon answered it and held it up to Dean's ear.

"Hello? Sam, we've been looking for you." Dean said, glancing at me. "I know. Yeah, I talked to Ellen. Lana and I just got here ourselves. It's a real funky town. You ditched us, Sammy. What, who?" Dean asked, looking up at Gordon. "I'm staying at 5637 Monroe Street. Why don't you meet me here?"

Gordon smiled when Dean nodded and took the phone back, hanging it up. "Now was that so hard?"

"Bite me," Dean told him angrily.

"Do you have a bucket?" I asked Gordon suddenly, trying to put a plan into motion.

Gordon raised an eyebrow as Dean did. "Why do you need one?"

"Morning sickness," I said sarcastically.

"Lanni…" Dean said, and we both knew that we were on the same lying page here to get me untied…even though there was a pang of hurt along with it.

"Harboring a Winchester?" Gordon asked, going over to his bag.

"I'd say more like…growing one. So…untie me so I can barf?" I asked him, looking up at him as innocently as I could.

Gordon laughed. "Nice try—not as convincing at lying with all that pain that crept into your eyes, Lana. Besides…demons talk…"

I swallowed because he was right—things that had to do with children still made my _eyes_ show pain and the demons were talking about it. I was so much better at masking it physically…but it all still hurt dully. Dean wanted kids…I wanted kids…and we couldn't have them together. The fact that Gordon could read my eyes was kind of painful…it was kind of eye-opening too because he _knew_ me…even if only a little bit.

"Gordy, I know that Sam, Lana and I ain't exactly you're favorite people, but don't you think that this is a little extreme?" Dean asked him.

Gordon scoffed at him. "What? You think this is revenge?"

"Well we did leave you tied up in your own mess for three days, which was awesome." Dean chuckled, and I gave him a look because though funny, yes…_not_ the time. "Sorry, I shouldn't laugh."

"Yeah, I was definitely thinking of whooping your ass for that." Gordon told him with a nod, "but this isn't about that. This isn't personal. I'm not…a killer, Dean. I'm a hunter…and your brother's fair game." He replied, cocking his gun.

"You have got to be kidding me." I told him, he and I making eye contact. "You can't just…kill Sam."

"But I can…and then I can come after you," he said, looking at me directly.

Gordon came over to us bringing a chair, and I frowned at him—he was acting like he had things to tell us. Like there were important things that we were missing that it was his job to point out to us. He was making me feel uncomfortable, but I was also feeling like I had a very _small_ sliver of a chance to use some magic…just needed a little more…

"What is this, like story time?" Dean asked him.

Gordon looked at the both of us. "See, I was doing an exorcism in Louisiana—teenage girl, same routine, some low level demon—but between all the jabbering and head spinning, damn thing muttered something about a coming war. Now I don't think it meant to, it just kind of slipped out, but it was too late. Peaked my interest—and you can really get a demon to talk if you got the right tools."

"And what happened to the girl it was possessing?" I asked him cautiously.

"She didn't make it," Gordon recalled.

Dean shook his head slowly. "Well you're a son of a bitch."

Gordon came over and hit him. "That's my momma you're talking about." Gordon told him as Dean made a face. "Anyway, this demon tells me they have soldiers to fight in this coming war. Humans fighting on Hell's side, can you believe that? I mean they're psychics so they're not exactly _pure_ humans, but still. What kind of worthless scumbag do you gotta be to turn against your own race? But do you know the biggest kick in the ass? This demon said I knew one of them: our very own Sammy Winchester."

He and Dean chuckled and I cracked a smile because even though that was true, there was no way in Hell that we were telling him that. What in the fucking Hell was going on around here and why to us? Then something hit me that Gordon had just said: '_pure_ humans'…psychics weren't pure humans? What exactly did that mean?

"Wow. This is a whole new level of moronic, even for you." Dean told him.

"Yeah? Come on, Dean. I know." Gordon told him, pulling a serious face. "About Sam's visions…I know everything."

"Really?" Dean asked him like he was stupid. "Because a _demon_ told you? Yeah, cause it wasn't lying."

Gordon looked at him. "Hey, Dean? I'm not some reckless yahoo. I did my homework, made damn sure it was true. Look, you've got your Roadhouse connections…I've got mine. It's how I found Sam in the first place."

Dean and I both exchanged looks over that, and then Gordon walked away from us and sat down. Suddenly everything was starting to make sense to me—Gordon honestly believed that _every_ psychic was dangerous and so he had a new obsession. Instead of hunting vampires because of his past, he was hunting psychics down because of what they could potentially do in the future…Gordon needed a hobby that had _nothing_ to do with hunting…simple as that.

"So is this what you've been…doing since then? Taking out psychics instead of vampires?" I asked him.

Gordon nodded at me. "I took out another one of these freaks about a month ago, here in town. He could deep fry a person just be touching them."

"He kill anyone?" Dean asked, trying to piece it all together.

"Besides Mr. Tinkles the cat? No…but he was working up to it. They're all going to be killers Dean. We gotta take them all out, and that means Sammy too." Gordon said, finishing loading and cocking his gun.

Dean scoffed at that. "You think Sam's stupid enough to walk through that front door?"

"No, I don't. Especially since I'm pretty sure you found a way to warn him." Gordon admitted and nodded and laughed at the looks on our faces. "Ha! You really think I'm that stupid."

"Well yeah, I know _I_ think you are." I admitted with a small shrug, keeping a smile at bay because I was feeling better…feeling a little more powerful…only a little more, but it could be enough.

"No, Sammy's going to scope the place first. See me covering the front door, so he's going to take the back…and when he does, he'll hit the trip wire. Then…boom." Gordon said with a hand movement.

Dean shook his head. "He's not going to fall for a frigging trip wire."

"Maybe you're right. That's why I'll have a second one. Hey look, I'm sorry. I wish I didn't have to do this, I really do, but for what it's worth, it'll be quick." Gordon explained to us. "Then we'll talk about Lana here."

"That's not worth anything." I told Gordon as he headed towards the trip wires to set them up. "What about me?"

"I gotta leave something for a finale," Gordon said with a smile on his face.

"If this has anything to do with me being a witch…" I told him slowly, "then you should have killed me already."

Gordon laughed and nodded, heading for the trip wires again, calling back to me. "All things in due time—I would rather like to watch you writhe in some more pain first."

I glanced over at Dean and he looked at me, our eyes meeting. Then he looked me over once, was convinced I was as good as I could be and then he opened his mouth to speak. I knew what he wanted to know, and I knew my answer was going to disappoint him more than it was going to give him hope.

"That stuff he sprayed you with—can you use your powers yet?" Dean asked me.

I shook my head. "They're too weak to free us. I can warn Sammy in his mind though."

Dean nodded at me slowly. "Do it."

We both stopped talking as we heard Gordon come back into the room and I knew there was little that we could do. So Dean and I were going to have to try and appeal to Gordon somehow…which was going to be hard because I was pretty certain he didn't exactly _have_ a heart…so how was this going to work? How was I going to get this all done?

"Come on, Man. I know Sam, better than anyone." Dean tried as Gordon brought a chair over. "He's got more of a conscious than I do. The guy feels guilty surfing the Internet for porn!"

"Maybe you're right," Gordon said with a shrug, "but one day he's going to be a monster and that's that."

"How? Huh? How does a guy like Sam become a monster?" Dean asked harshly.

Gordon shrugged. "Beats me, but he will."

"No! You don't know that!" Dean cried, and I could hear all of the pain in his voice and bit my lip.

"I'm surprised at you, Dean. Getting all emotional." Gordon said as Dean looked away and I glared at Gordon. "Lana I understand, but I thought _you_ were more professional than this. Look, let's say, you were cruising around in that car of yours, and uh, you had little Hitler riding shotgun, right? Back when he was some goofy, crappy, artist, but you knew what he was going to turn into someday. You'd take him out just like that, am I right?"

"That's not what Sam is," Dean and I said at once.

"Yes it is." Gordon replied, resting his hand on Dean. "You just don't see it yet. Dean, it's his destiny. Look, I'm sympathetic. He's your brother, you love the guy. This has gotta hurt like Hell for you, but here's the thing," He said, gagging him, "it would wreck me. But your Dad, if it really came right down to it, he would have had the stones to do the right thing here, but you're telling me you're not the man he is?"

"Go to Hell, Gordy." I told him firmly and he looked at me. "You don't get to talk to him like that…keep your opinions to yourself."

"Do I have to use the spray on you again?" Gordon asked me.

I sighed and looked at Dean, shaking my head slowly. "No…just gag away."

Gordon came over and gagged me as well, and then I sat there and looked at Dean who was freaking out. We were both unable to verbally communicate with Sam, but I had a plan—I always had a plan. Even if the plan was _really_ stupid and it got my best friend turned…I _always_ had a plan.

"_Calm down_." I told Dean in his mind. "_I'll warn Sam_."

Dean nodded while Gordon wasn't looking, and I concentrated as I felt Sam near us. I really only had one shot…I didn't have enough juice in me. My demon half was really working hard to overpower what Gordon had done to me, but it was pretty obvious that I wasn't going to be able to do too much…not until it wore off…I needed more practice and I knew it.

"_Sam_…_be careful_." I said softly in his head.

Just as I said that in his head, I heard Sam say that he would be, and then we heard footsteps and a clicking sound. Sam was here, and he knew he had to be careful, and I felt drained…I felt _really_ drained. There was no way that I was going to be able to warn him about anything else, but just that warning would keep him more alert…and I was _certain_ that it would keep him alive.

"You hear him?" Gordon asked us. "Here he comes."

There was an explosion, and Dean and I both tried to talk through our gags, but it didn't work. I knew that it was fruitless to even try, but Sam was out there and I was trying desperately to get to him…to sense him…but I was all tapped out and now _I_ was starting to panic even more too.

"Oh no, not yet. Wait and see." Gordon said slowly, looking towards where Sam would be coming to save us from.

There was another explosion and wood went flying everywhere, past Dean and I in our chairs. I felt some tears escape, and then Dean started to breathe harder into his gag as he felt sadness creep into him. We were both actually feeling pretty much like it was all over, and I worked at my restraints as Gordon looked at us and made a face like he was sorry…but he wasn't, and he was going to pay for this.

"Sorry, Dean," Gordon told him, and Dean started moving his chair.

I tried to focus on my powers, and though weak, I began to loosen my restraints when Dean and I turned to hear Sam cry, "Put the gun down now!" Sam came into the room after we heard a struggle, and untied us both, me grabbing him and hugging him tightly—I was _never_ going to be ready to let Sam go. There was a part of me that needed to have him with me forever…and that part of me scared me.

"Are you all right?" I asked, grabbing his face.

Sam nodded and then Dean grabbed his face as I let go, and looked him over. He didn't look too scratched up, but he had definitely suffered a beating. Gordon was responsible for this and I was going to show him that he did _not_ get to mess with me and live. He just didn't…

"Son of a bitch," Dean said, and started in the direction of where Gordon would be.

Sam grabbed a hold of Dean by his jacket. "Dean, no."

"I let him live once, I'm not making the same mistake twice," Dean told him as I headed towards Gordon and Sam grabbed my arm.

"Guys, trust me." Sam said calmly. "Gordy's taken care of. Come on."

Though Dean and I were slightly reluctant about it, we all left the house. We were headed out towards the Impala I assumed, when Gordon showed up again, and started shooting at us. The three of us took off running and I wished that my powers would just all come back so I could throw a fireball at him and take care of him once and for all.

"Come on! You call this taken care of?" Dean asked Sam.

We jumped behind a high piece of ground and I looked at Sam. "What are we doing?"

"Just trust me, all right?" Sam asked, and we saw cop cars pull up.

Gordon was surprised when the cops came for him, and they handcuffed him and then checked his car and found several weapons. He was out late at night shooting a firearm, and he had all sorts of strange shit in the back of his trunk—oh, he was totally boned for now, and that made me laugh a little. I reached out and stroked Sam's hair and he smiled at me before turning to look at Dean.

"Anonymous tip," Sam told him.

Dean smiled at him. "You're a fine upstanding citizen, Sam."

xx

When Gordon was taken away, we sat around at the car and Dean called Ellen while I pulled out the first aid kit and I wiped up Sam's face. I didn't want Dean to yell at Ellen because I knew she wouldn't give Sam up to anyone, but I was too focused on Sam. Sam had gotten hurt and Dean and I had been helpless to stop it.

"You okay?" I asked Sam slowly, blowing on his cut softly to dry the rubbing alcohol.

Sam shrugged a little. "I guess…you?"

"I'm going to be fine." I told him with a smile and made a fireball in my hand. "And look what I can do again. What I'm worried about is telling Kate…she'll hunt him down in prison and kill him for hurting you."

"One of the many services she offers?" Sam asked chuckling.

I nodded and shrugged. "Yeah…one of the many."

"Gordon Walker was hunting Sam! And he almost killed Sam, Lana and I because somebody over there couldn't keep their frigging mouth shut!" Dean yelled at her as Sam stroked my hair, the fireball going out. "Who else knows about Sam? You must've been talking to somebody! Gordon said he had Roadhouse connections, Ellen!"

When Dean got back into the car, I set my hand on his shoulder and he sighed a little, but kissed my hand. Then he pulled me close to him and kissed the top of my head, looking at Sam and nodding at him. He was glad that Sam was patched up and all right, and I knew he wasn't going to say it out loud.

"You two seem a little different." Sam said, a smile stretching across his face.

I shrugged at him. "Different, how?"

"It's almost like you finally realized that you're really in love." Sam told me and laughed when Dean rolled his eyes and I smiled.

"Or it was an empty motel room on a nice morning." Dean said, and I laughed a little and rolled my eyes this time.

"That sounded romantic." I replied, shaking my head.

Sam smiled though. "I'm just glad you two are completely patched up again—especially after everything lately…and I mean he's publicly showing his affection for you."

"It's just you, Sammy." Dean said with a shrug, kissing the top of my head and then getting into the driver's seat of the car.

I laughed a little because Dean really didn't feel like it was PDA in front of Sam, and I appreciated that, but also wished he'd be a little more PDA. I didn't want to make-out with him in public or anything, but I would like it if he got a little more visibly jealous when we were at bars like I did. Still…it was his little quirks that made me love him so much and besides…he trusted me enough to sometimes _not _feel threatened by the men that sent me drinks at bars…but would it hurt him every once in a while to at least _threaten _to rough one of them up?

"But I went missing and you two had sex?" Sam asked us, and while he made it sound serious at first, he was smiling a bit.

I laughed a little. "We just thought you were getting breakfast. When it took too long, we were all over finding you."

"Classy," Sam laughed.

"Hey, we found you, didn't we?" I countered.

Sam and I got into the car and after a little bit of talking, we were all pretty silent as we drove, Sam calling Ava every once in a while. She was the girl that had come to warn Sam about him dying that he had been with—turned out that she had the same power Sam did: visions. She had helped him to find some things out and was helping him to get closer to figure out what the Demon's plan for the psychics was, but she wasn't answering…and he kept trying. He was worried about her and so was I seeing as how Gordon couldn't be the _only_ one trying to hunt down and kill psychics.

"Hey Ava, it's Sam again. Um, call me when you get this. Just wanna make sure you got home okay. All right. Bye." Sam said and hung up the phone.

I sat up a little more in the back seat. "Is everything all right?"

"I sure hope so." Sam replied with a small nod.

"Well Gordon should be reaching for the soap for the next few years at least." Dean told us with a chuckle.

Sam nodded at that. "Yeah, if they pin Scott Kerry's murder on him, and if he doesn't bust out…"

"Dude, you ever take off like that again…" Dean began, but he trailed off, afraid of getting _too_ 'mushy'.

"What? You'll kill me?" Sam asked with a smile.

"That's so not funny." Dean said and gave Sam a look.

Honestly it was warming my heart to see them so cute together, even though they were both trying to be 'men'. They loved each other and they would do anything for each other and they knew that…they just hated having the tender moments. I on the other hand, was practically thriving on them—I _loved_ it when I got to see their care for each other slip through and show its true colors.

Sam chuckled. "All right, all right…so, where to next then?"

"One word: Amsterdam." Dean replied as Sam scoffed a little.

"Dean," Sam said firmly.

Dean sighed a bit. "Come on, Man. I hear the coffee shops don't even serve coffee."

"Where's the fun in that?" I asked him and winked because I knew he was making a joke.

Sam looked at him. "I'm not going to just ditch the job."

"Screw the job!" Dean told him. "Screw it, man. I'm sick of this job anyway. I mean we don't get paid. We don't get thanked. All we get is bad luck."

"Well come on Dude, you're a hunter." Sam tried and shrugged at him. "I mean it's what you were meant to do."

Dean shot Sam a look. "I wasn't meant to do anything. I don't believe in that destiny crap."

"You mean you don't believe in _my_ destiny?" Sam asked him slowly.

I looked over at Dean too as he shifted uncomfortably and I nodded—he really didn't want to believe that Sam would turn and neither did I. There _had_ to be more to all of this and we all knew it, but at the same time Sam wanted Dean to face it because _he_ was ready to. Honestly? I thought it was commendable that Sam was tired of running…so was I…we had to face whatever was coming, and we had to face all of it together.

"Well, whatever," Dean replied after a pause.

"Look, Dean, I've tried running before. I mean I ran all the way to California and look what happened. You can't run from this." Sam explained to him and then he swallowed. "And you can't protect me."

Dean didn't skip a beat. "I can try."

"Thanks for that." Sam told him softly.

"Aww! A brotherly moment!" I cooed, a grin spreading across my face.

"Don't make me come back there." Dean said as he looked into the rearview mirror.

"Look, Dean, I'm gonna keep hunting." Sam told him as I smiled at Dean, our eyes locking in the mirror. "I mean whatever's coming, I'm taking it head on, so if you really wanna watch my back, you're gonna have to stick around."

Dean smiled. "Bitch…"

"Jerk," Sam retorted.

Sam started to dial on his phone again and Dean glanced over at him as I started to text Jen something. Dean was pretty interested in why Sam kept trying to get a hold of Ava, and I just wanted to let Jen know that we would be home soon. After all, it was damn close to my favorite Holiday and I needed to be with Jen, and I wanted her to be warned because she had a husband and two babies on the way.

"You calling that Ava chick again? Are you sweet on her or something?" Dean asked Sam with a smirk on his face.

Sam raised his eyebrows in protest. "She's engaged, Dean."

"So? What's the point in saving the world if you can't get a little lookie once in a while, huh? What?" Dean asked as Sam looked worried. "It's not like you and Kate scratched the universal itch or anything…"

"It's just a feeling. How far is it to Pioria?" Sam asked him, ignoring his brother's vulgar comments.

Dean nodded at him and we went and looked around her house, finding a man dead on the bed. I went straight to the window since it was obvious that he had been murdered and I found the yellow, powdery substance that I had been looking for…and that wasn't good. All of this was some sort of plan and we needed to figure out if it was _the_ Demon, and _what_ the plan was that he had.

"Hey…sulfur," I pointed out to them.

"Demon's been here," Dean agreed as we looked at the windowsill.

Upon further investigation, Sam found Ava's engagement ring on the floor and picked it up looking really sad. "Ava."

**Note: The next chapter has some serious fluff, some angst, and some more of Lana's past. I hope you guys will like it! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	12. New Levels in Relationships

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay, here is the next chapter, and it's a 'filler' chapter, and it's fluffy/angsty, and I swear that Lana will tell them…you just gotta give her some more time. I was going to change things and have her tell them sooner rather than later, but I feel like she's at this place where Dean is still so anti-demon things that she doesn't want to lose him when she finally has him back. She'll do the right thing in a few more chapters.**

**This chapter also comes with a smut warning.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

I had three reasons for dragging Sam and Dean to Kansas the first week we were looking for Ava: Kansas is where everything seemed to have begun, Jen was getting more and more pregnant every day, and it was Christmastime. When we got to Kansas, Sam spent the first two days nonstop calling and talking to Ellen, and I spent time with Kevin and Jen _and_ helped with everything else. There was also the slight problem that I had run into once again when it came to the boys—a misunderstanding…they didn't _do_ Christmas.

How could a person _not_ do Christmas? I mean I understood that some people didn't celebrate it and that it was something that Sam and Dean hurt from since their Christmases were apparently never good but…it was the _one thing_ I felt accomplished with. I had no details about why they didn't do Christmas, but I just knew that if I wanted Christmas…I was most likely not celebrating it with the boys…and now I understood why the last Christmas neither of them had called me back when we had all separated.

"What are you saying?" I asked Jen suddenly, trying to wrap my mind around things.

Jen sighed and I knew she was trying to word it perfectly. "Look, Lan, I'm just saying that maybe you should try to look at this from a different angle. The only way you're going to find Ava is if—if you talk to the demon."

Kevin had made it practically a rule not to talk about demons in front of him while Jen was pregnant and not in front of her belly should they pick something up in the womb—his over protectiveness made me smile—but it wasn't like they wouldn't learn about it someday. So every time Jen went to talk about it, she'd look around, make sure he wasn't there, and then lower her voice to a whisper. Jen and I were eating some homemade cookies while Sam and Dean were out trying to find leads on Ava and still letting me be settled in for a little while…letting me hang out with Jen until Christmas was over…and possibly New Year's if I agreed to Dean's terms and 'special favors'…we'd see about that.

"I get that, Jen, but are you sure you're not just saying that because you're still mad about me letting myself almost die?" I asked her. "That somewhere deep inside you want me to go put myself in danger and fight to survive because you're twisted and then you'll regret saying it later?"

Jen sighed loudly. "It's more than that, Lan. It's that you were _willing_ to sacrifice yourself. What would have happened if Sam had turned and then in turn got you guys infected? What then? It was reckless and stupid. I know that you love them, and I know how much they mean to you and I get that and I love that, but you should have wanted to fight to live."

"I know, but…I just didn't know what to do without Dean. I love him more than anything, and I just wanted to be with him in the end…I couldn't just leave and let him and Sam _kill_ themselves, Jenny." I explained with a sigh, reaching out and resting my hand on her stomach, running my thumb along it through her shirt.

"I get that, Lan, but at the same time, I just wish you had thought about it before you went and offered yourself up to the demon practically just because of a boy." Jen explained with a shrug, resting her hands on mine. "I have nothing else to say on the subject, you know what you did."

I smiled at her. "I do love you, Jenny. And you two, yes I do. My little Goddaughters."

"There could be a boy in there!" Jen exclaimed, smacking my shoulder. "You'll give him a complex."

I laughed and looked up at Jen. "You just _want_ a boy so Kevin won't want to try for more kids when this is over."

Jen had only ever wanted to have the two kids—preferably one at a time and four years apart. That had always been her plan and then Kevin had gone and impregnated her with twins and now she was going to be done in one final swoop and she wanted a boy…because she and Kevin had always wanted to have a boy. I was still fairly certain that she was going to have girls and maybe that was just because I _wanted_ her to have adorable little girls that looked like her, but still.

Sometimes thinking about what those little girls would look like, made me a little reminiscent because I had hoped that mine and Dean's child would be a good combination of him and I. I also wanted my kids to bypass the whole 'powers' thing, but I knew that that would never happen so it honestly _was _just wishful thinking on my part. Man…I wished I could have had that baby. It made me want to see the gravestone I'd gotten for it—the one that Jen had helped me to put together.

"Hey, are you okay, Lan?" Jen asked as I looked at her stomach and my eyes started to glaze over a little with tears.

I looked up. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just—I really want my mother."

I handed tried to smile because I didn't want to bring her down or anything, but I was really upset and I didn't know what to do about it, so I stood up. Bringing down Jen's mood was the worst thing I could possibly do because I was so happy for her and what she had—children on the way, a husband, stability—I was jealous of her in so many ways. It made me start to think about where things were headed with me and Dean and I honestly didn't know…I didn't know if he thought about the future like I did…I didn't know if he would _ever_ consider marrying me…and I realized as I started to head out of the room that I actually _wanted_ to marry him.

"Lanni?" Jen asked and I turned a little to look at her.

"Yeah?" I asked her.

"I can tell them not to bother you." Jen told me with a nod, understanding of what it was I was about to go and do.

I gave a sad smile. "I'll have my phone off, but you can tell them I'm at the cemetery. Either one or both of them will try and come to see what I'm up to, and I honestly don't mind that—sooner or later they'll know, right?"

Jen nodded and I left the house, heading to my car and drove all the way to the cemetery, pausing when I parked and taking a deep breath. Jen and Kevin had been letting Sam, Dean and I stay in their guest rooms and I hadn't even been back to my house yet because there was some work being done on it…and I wasn't sure I could do this either. I took a deep breath though and headed to the grave marker, smiling at Bethany's and Marcus' graves and then my eyes settled on it: '**Casey Morgan Winchester: Beloved Child**'.

I had to take another deep breath to stop the tears from coming, and I put my hands in my pockets, looking at the grave marker softly. Jen had helped me to pick out the marble and the engraving and all of the little things, and I _knew _it had to go where my adopted parents had been buried…that had just felt right to me. Suddenly it dawned on me that I should have told Dean about it at least, but he never wanted to talk about it, and neither did anyone else…I didn't even like to talk about the miscarriage.

"Hey, Sweetheart," I said softly, dropping down to my knees.

I ran my fingers along the gray marble and tried hard not to cry—this was the child that could have been…the child that Chelsea had killed. If I hadn't been shot—if I hadn't have needed surgery—I would have been able to carry this baby to full term and be a mother…but I was never going to get that chance, and I was never going to get this baby back. My poor baby had never had a chance, and neither did my hopes of Dean and me becoming a family and building our own.

"I know that I haven't been by at all, but I'm still getting used to not having you around." I tried, my voice choked up. "I miss you so much. I have dreams about you sometimes, you know. Dreams where Daddy and I are excited to have you…dreams where there were no complications and we got to hold you…dreams where everything got to work out. I…I love you, I hope you know that. I would have given _anything_ to get to have you…and even though Daddy hates to talk about it…I know he would have to."

I couldn't say anything else no matter how hard I tried to. I started to choke out my words every time I opened my mouth and so I just ran my fingers along the marble and then kissed my fingers, touching them to the headstone. This was all I had to offer…I had been stupid enough to just come on a whim. Where were the flowers? Where were the talks about how _good_ all the other things were going?

"Visiting your parents?" Dean asked me.

I wiped my tears away and then I stood up and took his hand, shaking my head. "Nah, with my parents I can stand and cry all at the same time."

Dean nodded and then looked down at the headstone. "Casey Morgan…Winchester."

I nodded slowly as he started to tear up and then he turned to me and I knew what his eyes were asking. He wanted to know why I never told him, and why I had decided to name the baby what I had named it and yet he didn't say anything. Why couldn't he just say something? It hurt, and I _knew_ it hurt, but why couldn't we deal with it together? Why did he have to ignore _everything_?

"Yeah, so…Jen and Sam both hit dead ends and wanted to have us home for dinner." Dean said with a nod.

"Dean…you can talk about it." I told him softly.

He shook his head. "They need us."

"Dean—"

"—Lanni…please don't push me. I wasn't ready to visit with Mom's headstone, and I'm not ready to visit with Casey's."

Sometimes I just wanted to punch him and he knew it by the look in my eyes as I took my hand away from his and put it in my pocket. I understood that it was hard for him—I did—but at the same time I wished he would at least make it look like he cared. This was the grave of our child, the one that was taken away from us, and all he could do was think of his stomach—normally I would find him cute all hungry, but right now it was just simply ridiculous.

I walked away from him and heard him sigh, getting into my car and driving to Jen's, parking and heading inside. Dean came in shortly after and I smiled at Jen who had a meal made, and Kevin and Sam were actually talking to each other. It was a little strange, especially when Dean joined in, and so I went into the Kitchen and Jen looked up as I came in, smiling at me. It made me kind of happy to know that she was happy, but right then I was certainly _not_ happy.

"How did it go?" She asked me.

I shrugged and then made a face at Kaydence that made her smile a little. "He…he ignored it…everything. I know I shouldn't be upset but I'm _hurt_, Jenny…I'm _really_ hurt…"

Jen sighed and kissed my cheek. "Well, he hasn't dealt with his own mother yet either. I mean maybe I'm biased because I have kids inside of me now, but even though the woman gave him life and he knows her better, it was his flesh and blood that was taken from him. His child—his and _your _child—the child of the woman he loves with _all _of his heart—is six feet under…sorry."

I waved it off. "No, it's okay. I thought about all of that. The woman raised him and though he's the father of the baby I lost, if he can't cope with her death, I can't expect him to cope with this…so I shouldn't feel this bad, right?"

"It almost makes you want to feel sorry for him, doesn't it?" Jen asked me slowly.

I nodded at him. "He's had it hard."

Jen nodded in agreement and then I helped her with some of the serving bowls and plates and went out to put things on the table. The boys' eyes lit up as they saw us coming with the food, and I smiled at Kevin as he leaned up to kiss his wife. She had worked to make a huge dinner and he thought that she was just the bee's knees…and I was so proud of him…so glad that Jen and Kevin were happy.

"It smells wonderful, Sweetheart." Kevin told her, kissing her softly, all of us sitting down and starting to pass the food around.

Jen smiled at him. "Thank you. I worked hard to make it good."

"Where were you earlier?" Kevin asked me after he said grace.

"The cemetery," I told him, putting a piece of chicken in my mouth.

"Were you visiting your parents?" Sam asked me, glancing over.

I shook my head. "That wasn't why I went."

"She was visiting our kid's grave marker." Dean said and everyone was suddenly silent. "Could you pass the mashed potatoes, Kevin?"

Everyone looked at us for a moment, Kevin passing Dean the potatoes since he had gone from slightly depressive to wanting potatoes instantly. I couldn't blame him for being stoic—it was the way he coped with things, but at the same time, I didn't know quite how to deal with the fact that he seemed to just get over it, and I was stuck on it. How come Dean could move past this and I couldn't?

"The food is excellent." Sam told Jen, getting the focus off of me and Dean.

Jen smiled at him. "Nice to know it's appreciated."

"What kind of desert did you make?" I asked.

"I knew you'd want pie, so I whipped up an apple one—might not stand up to yours, but its good." Jen replied with a shrug.

I nodded, and we all had a nice dinner before Kevin and Jen got up to go and take a walk outside before bed, and then Sam went into the closest guest room, leaving Dean and I in the farthest one from everything—I swear it was planned. Either they wanted us to sex everything out, or they wanted to give us a place where we could argue without disturbing anyone. I kissed Sam's cheek swiftly and told him to sleep well and then I followed Dean into the guest room and took a deep, silent breath.

The two of us changed in silence, and then I was the first one in bed, lying on my side with my back to the middle of the bed. I lay there with my eyes closed for a good ten minutes before Dean finally got into the bed, and then slowly wrapped his arms around me and pulled my body close to him, glad I wasn't resisting at all. It felt nice to feel his chest heave against my back, and I loved his heartbeat…no matter how mad or how sad or how hurt…this was where I wanted to be.

"I'm sorry," He whispered to me, placing a kiss behind my ear softly.

I felt his right hand slide up my arm to my open palm, and our fingers entwined.

"It's all right," I said, kissing his hand and snuggling into him more as we pulled the covers up around us.

"No it's not." He replied, shaking his head. "I deal with grief more stoically."

I nodded slowly. "I know."

"It isn't fair to you," he said softly and his voice was shaking a little.

I squeezed his hand. "We deal with things differently, honey. I get it. Just because you don't look sad, doesn't mean you aren't torn up on the inside."

I turned over to face him as I heard his breathing change, and my heart broke at the pain written all over his face. I leaned in and kissed him, tracing his bottom lip with my tongue after a moment when he responded and ran his fingers through my hair, and he parted his lips for me. It felt so nice, his tongue swirling and pressing against mine, but then he pulled back and shook his head and we made eye contact.

"I don't deserve you, Lanni," he whispered.

I rolled my eyes and kissed him again, and then after pressing my forehead to his, I turned over, both of us lying in our original position. We lay there silent for a long while until we fell asleep and then in the middle of the night I woke up and turned over to find out that the bed was empty. I found a note on his pillow that read:

_I had to do something._

_Back in a bit._

Every nerve in my body was hoping he was at the cemetery, and so I dragged myself out of bed and grabbed a robe. Then I hurried to the cemetery and was surprised that he was actually there, standing next to the grave marker and running his hand down his face like he did when he was contemplative.

"I don't know what to say," he was saying to the headstone. "Your mother deserves so much more than all of this, you know? God, she loved you. I think all of this messed her up a little bit, and I wish I could fix it, but I can't, Man. She's broken…and to be honest…so am I. I honestly miss knowing you were in her stomach. I know your mother knows about the baby name book and the names I liked because she picked them…she even gave you my last name instead of hers…I think she wants more from me than I think I can give her no matter how much I love her." He added, starting to tear up again. "I've thought of asking her to think about retiring this job, but I think she feels the need to do this for you. To get back at the demon for sending us things that put us in danger—to find and kill Chelsea for doing this to her in the first place. I don't blame her…I won't ever forgive him for this, Casey—I swear to you…and I'll take care of your mother. I love her…I love you."

Dean nodded like he had said what it was that he had needed to say, and turned around to see me standing there. He stood his ground as I walked up to him and when I got to him we stood there for a moment, just looking at each other. Then he reached out his arms and he pulled me to him, me burying my face in his chest and nodding in understanding—he really didn't need to tell me anything else. I understood how he felt about it, and I understood that he loved me and that he had loved our baby and it just hurt him less not to confront it and I could deal with that…I was annoyed with myself for not being as understanding as he was.

"I could have come with you," I whispered to him softly.

He shook his head and kissed the top of mine. "No, Lanni, not this time. This was something I had to face on my own. Why didn't you tell me?"

I shrugged as I held onto him and he ran his fingers along my back, holding me to him and not letting me go. He rested his lips against my hair and took even breaths, kissing my head again and waiting for my answer. I opened my mouth to speak because he honestly deserved to know, and if he never forgave me for keeping it from him, then I could completely understand that—this was something we both should have been able to cope with together earlier.

"I was getting used to the idea of it all myself," I admitted to him slowly. "Plus…I didn't know how to bring it up in conversation. 'Oh yeah, I had our child buried in Kansas next to my adopted parents' graves'."

"I saw that," he nodded. "I'm glad he's near the two of them…and I wouldn't normally think like that because I'm a realist."

I nodded and pulled back, smiling up at him. "But doesn't it almost make things easier? To think that Grandma and Grandpa are taking care of him?"

Dean turned to face me and nodded, stroking my hair. "It does at that."

I smiled because I knew that he truly meant that, and I leaned up as he leaned down, kissing him gently. Then he pulled away and we grasped hands, and after one more glance at the grave marker, we headed out of the cemetery and headed back to Jen's and Kevin's house. For now this was the kind of closure we needed, and it was the only closure on it that we were really going to get…and I felt satisfied.

xx

"What are you doing?" I asked Dean, propped up on my hand under the covers, looking at him and raising my eyebrows.

He shrugged at me, focused. "I'm reading."

"I saw the book. So…what are you _doing_?" I asked him again. "Are there any pretty pictures in there?"

"I should get you for that," Dean told me as I grinned.

I rolled my eyes because he _knew_ that he thoroughly enjoyed my little joke about his reading—or lack thereof—and I had to smile at him. He was trying to lose himself in something and he didn't have a hunt to do that with, so he had randomly woken up and gotten himself one of _my_ books out of _my_ duffle. Now he was just lounging there and part of me was surprised there had been no solicit for an early morning romp…I actually would have liked that.

"You've been…different for the last two days." I said, trying not to bring up him talking to the gravestone much.

"I thought I would catch up on my reading," Dean shrugged.

I looked at the cover and laughed when I saw it was one of my 3 Harlequin books. "Dean…you do realize what kind of book that is, right?"

"It's about a guy trying to save this chick with red heels." Dean told me because he wanted to prove he wasn't retarded but it was obvious he'd just read the title and the back of the book.

"Dean," I said, pausing for dramatic effect, "that's a romance novel."

"It is not," Dean said, giving me a look.

I laughed and nodded. "I happen to have read '_**High-Heeled Alibi**_'…flip to page 188."

Dean sighed and did as he was told like he was going to prove me wrong, but as he read the more explicit scene, his eyes widened. Honestly the only three Harlequin books I had I had picked up at one of those library sales and I hadn't realized what they were. Then I read '_**Engaging Bodyguard**_' and realized that they were a series of romance novels, and the other two just didn't stand up to the first one I had read and I hadn't bought another one since then and probably would keep it that way. I just wasn't one to buy romance novels…but it wasn't like I didn't enjoy the ones that I now happened to have.

"Oh…you like this kind of stuff?" He asked and wiggled his eyebrows which made me laugh and snuggle back into the pillow on my side of the bed.

"The only one I truly _adore_ is '_**Engaging Bodyguard**_'." I admitted with a blush. "So perfect…he's a spy, she's the love he never allowed himself to have, they have to work together, she has to find herself…the characters kind of remind me of us actually. They meet, they're attracted, he seduces her and she wants it, and then she falls hard and he pushes her away, and it's a little more complicated then that, but the point is…I think they're perfect…and though she wants to be the seducer the next time around as he's falling in love and she almost gets herself killed saving him, _you're_ the seducer in _our_ relationship."

Dean laughed loudly. "Except lately—remember that car thing before Sam was infected? That whole thing with the demon virus?"

"Yeah…I remember," I told him with a nod.

"So…" he began, holding up the book, "…wanna try this?"

I realized he was serious and I leaned in a little. "I _would_ much rather seduce you…"

Dean set the book down and got further under the covers with me his face close to mine and nuzzled my nose with his softly. He was breathing on me, glancing at my lips and yet not letting himself to actually touch my lips with his. Then he locked gazes with me and I swallowed as he brushed his lips against mine as he spoke up this time.

"By all means," he whispered.

I suddenly remembered where we were when I glanced at the door. "Now? In Jen's guest room?"

"Why not?" Dean shrugged, eyeing my mouth again.

I got out of the bed in one swift movement and went to the door, opening it and then going out to the railing and looking down at Jen and Kevin standing there talking. They seemed like it was any other normal morning and they were discussing something definitely mundane, but it had to be done. So I opened up my mouth and made my decision right then and there because we were here and it was what I wanted.

"Dean and I are going to have sex, so sorry if you can hear us." I told them.

Jen and Kevin both looked up flabbergasted and then Jen burst out laughing as Kevin's eyes widened in protest. Kevin looked at his wife and then back up at me and decided then and there that Jen and I were both just incredibly crazy and I smiled a little and nodded at Jen. She was definitely on board with it, and I decided that I was just going to have to support my statement for Kevin and his sanity.

"Don't worry we'll do laundry right after," I assured them.

"Can you wait for like five minutes?" Jen asked me, wiping away a couple tears.

I shrugged playfully. "I don't know…I'm yearning for him."

Kevin sighed loudly when Jen laughed again. "Just be quiet about it…there's a plumber coming for the sink in ten."

I nodded and gave him a thumbs up. "Absolutely…"

With that I turned around and went back into the room, closing the door behind me with a smile. It was wiped off of my face though when I saw Dean standing a few feet away from me putting a button-up shirt on over his t-shirt, his jeans already on. Hadn't he just been the one that was wanting to try out some new things? Why in the world was he getting _dressed_?

"What are you doing?" I asked him suddenly.

He scoffed like I should know. "I'm getting dressed."

"Why?" I asked, taking a step towards him.

"You rejected me," he said matter-a-factly looking up at me. "You up and got up and dashed off."

I shook my head and smiled. "No, I didn't. I just told Kevin and Jen that we were going to have sex—I was warning them. Take that shirt off…come on."

Dean looked confused, but then he smirked at me and buttoned up the last two buttons deliberately and cocked his head to one side. This man was seriously going to be the death of me if he kept this up and he knew it, damn him! He took a step away from me and I put my hands on my hips, looking at him and smiling a little.

"Make me," Dean told me.

I walked over to him and rested my hands on his shirt, looking him in the eye. "You ever wonder how I deal with you?"

Dean smiled and I felt butterflies erupt in my stomach as he looked down at me and got that cheeky look on his face. He knew that he was about to get _exactly_ what he wanted and so did I, and it made him really cocky. I honestly loved it though…why? I have no idea, but it was just one of the things that I knew turned me on about him and I wouldn't have him any other way—cause then he just wouldn't be the man that I loved.

"Nah, I just wonder how you resist me." He chuckled.

I smirked and pulled on his shirt, the buttons popping off of it, and he looked at me with a new look on his face I hadn't seen before. I wasn't sure if he was just totally surprised, or if he was impressed, or upset, or all three. He just kind of gawked down at the button-up and at the couple of buttons that 'pinged' against surfaces and then he looked me in the eye and I just shrugged a little, the smile still on my face.

"That…was my favorite shirt," he said slowly and then he smirked a little and I knew he was perfectly all right with it.

I smiled more and kissed him, stopping his hands as he tried to drop the shirt off of his shoulders. He cocked his head to the side and I shook my head, biting his bottom lip and then pulling back a little, a firm hold on his now button-less button-up. I shrugged slowly and then cocked my head to the side too, watching his eyes on me.

"_I'm_ seducing _you_, remember?" I reminded him.

"You mean I can't do _anything_?" He asked me softly.

I shook my head. "Not unless I tell you to."

"Damn," he said, running his knuckles along my chest purposefully, a smile on his face.

"Stop…" I said softly, because he knew my pleasure spots and he knew it.

"Make me…" he whispered into my ear, his hot breath on my neck.

Pleasant shivers ran down my spine, and I kissed his neck, sucking on it softly and then biting down on it gently, which made him moan, so I knew I was doing something right. I started to push his button-up off of his shoulders and he ran his hands along my sides, and I allowed it for a moment. Then I pushed his button-up off onto the floor and went to lift up his t-shirt.

"It's not _so_ bad relinquishing _some_ control is it?" I asked him with a small laugh.

He chuckled. "I certainly don't mind watching you."

"Good," I replied with a shrug and he lifted his arms up so that I could pull his shirt off, smiling at him when I tossed it aside.

My hands went down to his jeans and I sighed a little when he ran his fingers along my scar on my stomach, and bit my lip. He was cheating, and he knew it, but he was choosing to continue the soft caressing and I hadn't stopped him yet…okay then that was my bad…

"You're a cheater," I said with a smile.

"Baby, you know I don't play by the rules…"

He smirked, and then his chest tightened slightly as I kissed it, relaxing when I made a slow trail of kisses down towards his pants, only to stop and go back up. I pushed him back onto the bed and crawled on top of him, allowing him to run his fingers along my bra straps. He opened his mouth to say something, but my mouth covered his, and in the same movement I pinned his hands to the bed and he chuckled a little into the kiss. I smiled at the feeling of his body rumbling against mine and then started to softly bite my way down his torso, getting off the rest of his clothes and then pausing at his navel. I glanced up at him and made eye contact with him, my tongue darted out and his eyes widened…it was like he knew what I was contemplating before I had even done it.

"Lanni…" He began, but I shook my head and placed a soft kiss to his straining member.

"Just enjoy it," I whispered, knowing that eventually our relationship would end up at this point—me having to move past my awkward fears and do what I was sure that he had thought in the back of his mind that he had been missing. "Besides…it's not that bad…"

Dean leaned his head back against the pillows. "Lanni…"

"You're going to ruin it if you keep talking," I replied with a small shrug, keeping his hands pinned to the bed.

As nervous as I had been about it, it honestly _wasn't_ that bad, no matter the thoughts running through my mind as everything started to escalate. There were sounds coming from Dean I had never heard him make before at that intensity as my mouth traced parts of him I'd never let my mouth touch before, and eventually he started trying to stop me. He didn't want to reach his release before I reached mine, but this time it was my game, and he was going have to deal with it, and when he was lying there, riding out the waves of his climax, I let his hands go and he immediately pulled me to him.

I smiled into the kiss, opening up my mouth and letting him taste himself on my tongue totally and utterly giving all control to him and letting him flip us over. He smiled at me and kissed my lips tenderly before his mouth trailed downwards and he tried to reciprocate what I had done and I was kind of surprised I hadn't let him talk me into this sooner. I had to silence every voice that told me that it only felt this amazing because Dean had done this before…a _lot_…and once I was feeling a little bit more in the moment and not trapped in my head, the experience was far more pleasurable.

"Baby, you're so beautiful." Dean whispered, kissing up my body to my lips as I trembled beneath him, both of us ready for just one more climax…just one more.

I slipped my fingers into his hair and smiled a little. "You are too."

"God, I love you." Dean breathed, and I simply kissed him back as he pushed his flesh into mine, me biting his lip as it happened, which chain reacted a moan from him.

At first I was caught off guard because he _never_ said those words, let alone first. I knew that he meant it and I knew that he did, but hearing him say it was just so perfect that I was suddenly so much more in the mood than I had been before. I wondered if everyone could hear us, actually…Dean and I certainly weren't censoring ourselves this morning because we had reach a new place in our relationship and I was cherishing it. I was cherishing _him_…and I always would.

We were used to this dance, and we moved against each other at the same pace, both of us only thinking about each other, and about how to make the other person feel good. It was all that mattered right there, and it was all that I could possibly have wanted, and when we both climaxed at the same time, it was like nothing else in the world mattered. We were just us, and this was just one more thing that we did together, and we did perfectly…and I couldn't ask for anything more than that, and I wouldn't want to.

"Wow," I breathed out, looking up at the ceiling as Dean rolled off of me onto his back and then I closed my eyes and just smiled.

Dean chuckled. "Did you learn that from your trashy romance novel?"

"If I say I did?" I asked him with a laugh.

"Then I say read more trashy romance novels," he replied and we both laughed together.

I turned and shook my head, snuggling up against his warm, wet, body and holding him as he held me. He was stroking my hair and kissing my wet temple, both of us trying to catch our breaths…trying to figure out what to say next. It was new for us, and yet it felt like this was just one of those other things for us…it was just one of the other things that kept us bonded together.

"For the record, I _didn't_ learn that from any of the novels…I just know your pleasure points and your turn-ons." I whispered to him. "You've been teaching me a lot, Dean—I'm like your own personal pleasure machine or something, seeing as how in sex, I'm 'trained' to know what _you_ want. Besides, I figured it was time for something new."

He nodded slowly. "It was a rather pleasurable new experience…are you all right?"

"I'm perfect…it wasn't as scary or awkward as I thought it was going to be." I replied and closed my eyes. "God, I'm exhausted."

"That was quite a run before eating anything today." Dean admitted, nodding slowly and keeping his fingers gliding through my hair.

I smiled and then tilted my head up smiling when he glanced down at me and our eyes met and I kissed him. It was soft and caring, and I knew that it was simply a marker for us—it was just to show that this is where we belonged and nothing was going to change it…ever. Well, at least that was how Dean was feeling…I _mostly_ felt that, but knew that eventually when I came clean about my father, Dean was going to be distant…but I wasn't going to let that ruin this moment…this moment was perfect.

"I love you," Dean told me softly, kissing me tenderly some more. "I know I never say it, but I do. You're not some pleasure machine, you're my home."

"I know, Baby," I smiled and nodded, kissing him back. "I love you too. I love who you are, I love how you deal with things…I love everything about you."

Dean opened his mouth to say something else, when there was a knock on the door and I groaned a little bit. I was tried, Dean was a little tired, and I was pretty sure that this was just a little heads up from Jen that she needed us to do something. That meant using energy we'd just used on each other that we didn't necessarily have anymore.

"You guys done with the sex yet?" Jen asked us through the door.

I laughed a little. "Yeah Jen, but if you come in, we'll still be under the covers."

"Whatever, just cover up the important parts…I'm giving you sixty seconds." She said impatiently, so I knew it was important.

I looked at Dean. "You wanna to put your pants on?"

Dean sighed and nodded, hurrying up out of bed and putting his pants on, me grabbing his discarded button-up shirt and covering myself with it. Then we both sat on the end of the bed, clad with the important parts covered as Jen walked in and smiled at us. She crossed her arms over her chest and then looked at me, not really giving Dean a second glance since he was topless and though attractive, she knew I'd give her Hell about it later if her eyes lingered on him.

"Sam says he found us a case." Jen explained to me.

I nodded at her slowly. "We'll be down in a good…give us an hour so we can shower."

"Absolutely!" Jen smiled and headed out of the room, closing the door behind her.

xx

I leaned on the doorframe as Dean unzipped his jeans and he looked at me, smiling a little and then just standing there. He wanted to know what it was that I was planning on doing, and I wasn't quite sure yet…I was still thinking about it.

"Joining me or watching me?" He asked me, hands now up in the air a little.

I shrugged and smiled. "A little of both."

"No shower sex scenes in those novels of yours?" He joked as he winked.

I laughed again. "Normally it's on floors, and it usually starts on kitchen cabinets."

"Wow…they sure know how to do it then," he joked, and he took my hands, resting them on his stomach. "Joining me or watching me?"

I smiled and kissed him. "Joining…"

"Good," he said, and rested my hands on the sides of the top of his jeans. "Seduce away."

I laughed loudly and he smiled at me, running his fingers along my hands as I took a step closer to him and kept my hands splayed there against his stomach. Feeling his muscles under my hands was honestly one of my favorite things about being this close to Dean, and he knew how much I loved to feel him up. So all in all, both of us were winning and after such a rewarding morning, this was still just as much fun.

I kissed his chest, our eyes still locked. "You like this too much."

I pressed my lips to his as his smirk grew and then I ran my fingers down his stomach to his belt loops, biting his chest a little. After a moment or two I pulled back and let go of his belt loops, pulling his borrowed shirt off of myself and looking up at him, closing my eyes and smiling when he slipped his fingers into my hair. I opened my mouth to say something but just let his fingertips run along my scalp before my eyes fluttered open and I found my voice.

"I think I'm done with this whole feminine power thing." I told him as I ran my fingers along his necklace.

"Are you?" He asked slyly.

I moved my hands back down to his pants and then slid them off and got into the shower as he closed his eyes. I shut the curtains and turned on the water smiling to myself, and adjusting the temperature, running my fingers through my hair. Then I heard a grunt and a sigh and I couldn't help but laugh just a little.

"Lanni…" Dean said, and I laughed a little more.

"Sorry, Deano, but I need a shower. Sam found a case and we need to do it." I told him with a shrug. "It'll give you something to do."

"'Deano'? What's with 'Deano', 'Lano'?" He asked climbing into the shower with me as the warm water ran down my body. "And for the record I had some_one_ to do, and that was going _really_ well."

I made a face. "'Lano'?"

"Now take that disgust," He said, tilting the show head so that the water was hitting him, "and you know what I think about 'Deano'."

I nodded and stepped closer to him, both of us smiling and taking our shower, and then getting out and getting dressed. As usual, Dean wore a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, and I wore jeans and a nice cute, feminine top, and then I pulled my hair back. We went downstairs and went over to the table, the others looking up at us. Sam handed Dean and I the papers he had been looking at, and I smirked a bit as Dean rested his hand on my hip farthest from him, pulling me to him.

Sam took a breath. "I think we're back to vampires."

"Seriously?" Dean asked as I flipped through the papers.

I sighed loudly and then my eyes found information and I gasped. "Oh my God, Jenny…Chelsea."

"What?" Jen asked, taking the papers from me quickly. "Damn—this really _is_ her M.O., isn't it?"

"Guys…Jen and I have to finish this thing with Chelsea." I said, her and I making eye contact and nodding at each other.

"You do _not_!" Kevin cried, shaking his head. "You are _pregnant_!"

The pain in his voice even hurt _me_, so I couldn't _imagine_ what it was doing to Jen right then. Kevin didn't want his wife and mother of his children to go and put herself in danger and I understood that…but at the same time Jen and I could take care of ourselves. Jen and I had to do this…this was _our_ fight, and the boys were just going to have to understand that.

"But Kevin…we _do_." Jen told him. "This—everything she does is our fault."

"She goes around killing people—that isn't your fault." Dean protested.

_Should we tell them, Lan?_ Jen asked in my mind.

Sam nodded in agreement with Dean. "You don't control her or any of the things that she does, so you shouldn't take responsibility for them."

_I think it's time_. I replied in hers.

Kevin sighed loudly. "You shouldn't take responsibility for what she is and what she does—Sam is right."

_Then let's do it_. Jen told me.

"But we _are_ the reason she's a vampire," I said softly, biting my lip. _And it's out_.

"What?" The boys all asked at once.

Jen and I looked at each other and we knew that it was finally time to explain about what was going on with us. We had never really come out and told _anyone _the whole story about the night that Chelsea was murdered…the night she was turned. I felt _far _more responsible for Chelsea turning than Jen did, but that was how I _should_ have felt and I knew it.

_Jen and I had been training Chelsea for a good few months because she knew what we did and she wanted to be part of it and we couldn't stop her. So, it was better that she was prepared and out with us, then just running off without us and getting herself killed. She wasn't magical like us, but she was proving to be particularly good at fighting, so we had been taking her on hunts and protecting her as best as we could—we after all didn't want her dead._

"_Chelsea, Jen is going to do a spell to secure the perimeter, I'm going to save the boy, and you're going to sneak in and grab the rune." I explained to her slowly._

"_Shouldn't **you** grab the rune, Lan?" Chelsea asked me. "You're the other one with powers in a place filled with vampires."_

_I knew that she had a point so I nodded and turned to Jen. "Jen, do you think there will be more people guarding the boy or the rune?"_

_Jen pondered that. "As important as they both are, probably the rune."_

"_Then I'll get the rune." I said at once with a nod._

_When all was agreed, the three of us set out towards the abandoned mill and looked up at it. It was large, and the rune was inside and we desperately needed it—it would unlock a mystery that we had been spending our whole **lives** trying to figure out. The boy would be in the barn near us, and guarded by a good three or four vampires and we needed to get this done **without** any casualties._

"_You sure you want to do this, Lan?" Jen asked me. "Letting Chels go in and all?"_

_I nodded at her. "She has it under control."_

_We both knew, however, that she didn't have it under control, and we exchanged worried glances. The thing about Chelsea was that sometimes she ran in without a care in the world and sooner or later that was going to get her taken out. Jen and I were always worried about protecting her and sometimes that got in the way of what we were doing, but she was stubborn…she was doing this with or without us…without us was **not** an option._

"_I can handle it, guys, stop acting like my mother." Chelsea said and we knew she was **beyond** annoyed with us._

"_I can't help it, Chels," Jen told her—she had always been the more protective one even though I was the smothering motherly one._

_I looked at her and shrugged. "We don't want your safety jeopardized. Do you have the holy water and the stakes…well…something to decapitate them with?"_

"_Lan…how many times do I have to prove myself?" Chelsea asked, more than a little aggravated._

"_Look, as much as I want to make sure no one is missing anything, we have limited time to actually get in and then get back out safely." Jen reminded us._

_Chelsea and I nodded at her, and then headed off to our locations while Jen hid herself outside. I went into the mill and at first seeing no vampires was a plus, but when I found the fake rune, I knew it was all a trap. I should have let Chelsea come in here like the original plan had been. Instead, it was Chelsea who was now in danger and Jen or I had to get to her…and get to her **now**._

**Chelsea, get out now**!_ I said in her head._

**Lan, something's wrong**._ Jen said in mine. _**The spell isn't working**.

_Jen and I hurried to the barn, and when we got there, no more than eight vampires cornered Chelsea. Jen began to use her fireballs, but I hadn't mastered that again yet, and so I brought up force fields and used my stake, and we took them out. The problem was the boy was nowhere to be found and the rune was gone, but at least we'd taken out eight vamps…that was at least a plus._

"_You good?" I asked Chelsea, looking her over._

_She nodded and shook me off her arm softly. "Yeah, hey…they knew we were coming. I don't know how, but they did. They left this note, and I'm going to go…alone."_

"_Chels, that's not a good idea. It's just another trap." Jen warned her._

"_I agree with Jen—we have to do this together." I said and repressed the urge to tell her that she was being completely stupid about all of this._

"_But don't you see? If I'm bait as the fourth, then we're on our way to figuring out what they're going to do." Chelsea explained, pleading with us even though we both knew she didn't truly **need** our permission because we would **never** use our powers **on** her. "They won't go after you two—you guys have powers."_

_Jen and I exchanged looks and then I turned to her first even though Jen's eyes pleaded with me. There was **no** way that she was going to let Chelsea go, but I knew Chelsea had a point and we were running out of options. She was going to have to be bait and that was just the way that it was going to have to be._

"_All right," I told Chelsea with a nod._

_So that night, Jen and I kept a watch on Chelsea…until she evaded us. One of Jen's special tactics is getting away from people without a trace—a tactic she taught Chelsea. So now she was not only bait, but she was most certainly out on her own where Jen and I could no longer protect her, which meant that she could die tonight…we were so screwed._

"_Thanks for teaching her that," I told Jen bitterly._

_Jen shot me a look. "Thanks for letting her use herself as bait."_

"_It's all right…we'll find her." I told her, though I wasn't so sure—the girl hadn't left us anything to go off of except our feelings._

_When we found Chelsea, we hurried down the dark alley and we gasped, her body collapsed there. I touched her cold body first, and Jen threw up in a part of the alley about half a foot from us, but not sobbing…she wasn't a crier. The sound of her retching made me want to retch, but the worst part was that Chelsea's eyes fluttered open—she was one of them._

"_Fuck," I said aloud as Jen began to cry—our best friend had after all **died**._

"_Lan…" Jen was saying, backing away._

_I reached out to Jen and starting moving my hand wildly. "Where's the stake, Jen?"_

"_Why would you need a stake?" Chelsea asked, her hand gripping my throat and then she lifted me up into the air. "Am I worth taking seriously now?"_

"_Jen…" I choked out, throwing holy water at Chelsea's chest._

_Chelsea let go of me, but Jen stayed there, frozen in place as Chelsea screamed a little bit. She was definitely a vampire now, and all I could think about was that as much as it was my fault, Chelsea had to go…we **had** to stake her. If only I could get through to Jen—she was just frozen in place because this was our best friend…and we had gotten her turned into a monster…_

"_JEN!" I cried finally._

_I grabbed the stake from her, but when I turned around, Chelsea was gone, and I whirled on Jen. I didn't want to get angry with her but at the same time, I really wanted to have had this dealt with. Now Chelsea was gone, undead, and we were going to have to somehow tell that to her parents…somehow bury her body…a body we would never have._

"_Jen, you let her get away!" I yelled at her._

"_She's—she's Chels, Lan." Jen protested strongly._

"_She's not Chels anymore." I told her, closing my eyes. "Not at all…"_

The boys looked at us as Jen and I looked at the table because it was everything we had needed to get off of our chests…well mostly. The two of us had been responsible for Chelsea and I had sent her out to her doom…and then Jen's love for Chelsea had made the staking process never happen. Then we both looked up and Jen was the first one to speak and I knew I had to let her.

"I—I hope now you understand now why we take this so seriously…well…personally." Jen said as Kevin gripped her hand. "Lan sent her into danger before she was ready, but when it came down to it, I couldn't stake her—couldn't let anyone stake her. Everyone she hurts or kills is on us."

Dean sat down and I leaned on the chair, wishing he was still holding me, but he wasn't. This was a lot for him to take in, and at the same time I knew it wasn't Chelsea becoming a vampire that was getting to him…it was Jen and I wanting to do this alone. Also…there were behaviors in the past that Sam was voicing out in questions while Dean took my lack of communication much more personal.

"But if you knew, why were you so surprised that she called?" Sam asked me.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…that would bring us to actually a couple of things. 1) I didn't think Chelsea would honestly try to talk to us again, especially me since I would have killed her. 2) That would bring us to our parents…like your Dad."

"Dad?" Dean asked, looking up at me finally.

Jen nodded at him. "Yeah…we're not as uninformed as you think."

Sam raised his eyebrows. "What does our Dad have to do with anything?"

"John knew about the rune…so did Jen's father and my mother…it's…I guess you could call it a family heirloom." I explained to them.

"He what?" Sam asked skeptically.

I nodded at them. "I had heard of your father before—he was mentioned once in my mother's diary. I didn't realize it was your father because she only ever mentioned him by his first name, but then Bethany and Marcus showed me his face, I met him, and he explained that he knew my mother…and I put it all together. When you guys met us at Chelsea's wake, that was…well…we knew the vampires were in on it all. We had been on the case for a while actually trying to get the rune back and then we killed the vampires and hit a dead end."

"And this—the only reason Chelsea is still alive is because she has the rune." Jen explained to them. "The rune is the answer to everything."

"What do you mean everything? Does it have to do with the demon?" Dean asked us hopefully.

I shrugged slowly. "I have no idea if it has to do with the demon. I just know that it has to do with Jen and me unlocking our powers. It's the key to our powers, and that's why Chelsea can't die—she's using it for power instead of answers…the key to killing her could potentially be there too…"

"Why didn't you tell us all of this?" Kevin asked, and Dean and Sam nodded.

"Well…it was hard." I told him slowly. "It all hurt."

"We—I don't think you understand how hard it is for us to cope with the fact that we did this to our best friend. This is _our_ battle—we didn't want you all to know, but…well…Lan and I decided a little bit ago to come clean." Jen explained to me.

I swallowed down the lump in my throat. "It would be wrong not to tell you when obviously the killings are starting up again and Jen and I need the rune now more than ever and it's finally close again—we finally have leads."

Kevin nodded slowly. "Well, I don't want you to go, but if this is a personal battle…then I'll allow it. You guys can take care of yourselves, and I know you'll go to all extremes to stay safe—that _you'll_ go to extremes to keep my wife alive, Lana."

Jen kissed him. "Even if I kick her for it, Lana would die for me. You know that by now, don't you, Kevin? Besides…I'd die for her too and we're not as stupid as we were before. We can handle this."

"Of course," Kevin assured her. "Can the boys at least be back up? I don't want my wife to miscarry."

"We're coming," Dean said, standing up and nodding.

I looked over at him and Jen bit her tongue—he was mine, and so convincing him and Sam that this was _our_ fight was _my_ job. It was for me to do and I was glad to do it even though I knew that Dean was going to be much more stubborn about this than Kevin. Kevin was still feeling shaky about it, but he knew how his wife worked, and he knew I'd sacrifice myself to let Jen live…so he had caved. That and if it came down to it, Jen and I would use our protective spells instead of going for the rune…self preservation it was.

I set my hand on Dean's. "No, Dean, this is _our_ fight."

"Lan…" Sam protested with a nod. "It's better if we come."

I shook my head. "It really isn't. We know Chelsea better than you do."

"Really boys, let us do this on our own—don't make me make Lan and I untraceable, because I will if it becomes necessary." Jen warned them when she realized that Dean's eyes were warning us that he was _not_ backing down.

Dean looked me in the eye. "Can I talk to you alone for a moment?"

"It's all right, Lan, I need to go change and grab the stake guns." Jen said, and she left the room as Kevin and Sam went into the kitchen to talk.

I looked at Dean, and for the first time since I had met him, I could see and feel the fear coming off of him. He was worried about me, and he was worried that I didn't have this under control, and I appreciated his care and concern, but I really couldn't take him or Sam with us. There were things I had to deal with on my own and when I reached up to stroke his cheek, he nodded slowly and tried to swallow down his pain.

"I swear, you get yourself killed and I'm gonna—" He began, but I pressed my lips to his.

"You worry too much," I told him pulling him close to me. "Jen and I are going to be fine…I promise you that."

xx

Jen and I had found some evidence on where Chelsea was hiding and we were pretty sure it was only this easy because she was expecting us. It was off in farm territory, but we walked for the purpose of being inconspicuous and because even if it was a trap, having a car was _not_ going to help us. Chelsea had picked an old abandoned farmhouse, and we knew from a glow upstairs that the rune was on her—that she was luring us here intentionally and we needed to know why…

"That was a little presumptuous," Jen told me, "bringing it like she would win the fight."

"Chelsea always thought that she had everything in the palm of her hands." I reminded her with a small laugh.

Jen nodded slowly. "Well…let's go."

"We'll be fine." I told her because she looked worried.

"If you say so," Jen said smiling a little and I matched it.

We both took a deep breath and then we headed towards the abandoned farmhouse and we paused at the door, but opened it up, sneaking inside. When we got into the house, we got in fine without any hassle, but then a vampire spotted us and Jen and I booked it into another room. The best thing to do at this point was to hide—it was all that we could do and we knew it.

"Remember when I said we were going to be fine? I was wrong." I told Jen as we hid under a table while the twenty or so vampires tried to find us.

Jen smiled a little. "Yeah, but it's a good thing I used that spell when you sensed the boys following us—it worked on the vampires too."

"All right," I told her with a sigh, "I think the best thing would be a good dose of fireballs…the problem is we don't want to burn the place down before we get our hands on the rune."

"Then we need a diversion," Jen said with an affirmative nod.

I sighed and nodded in agreement. "Yeah…so I'll be bait."

"Lan…I think I should be bait." Jen told me slowly. "My powers are stronger than yours because I stay practiced, and you know for a fact that Chelsea is where the rune is, so you're more likely to get hurt—I can take the vampires, Lan, and you know it. I'm practically as good at taking out vampires as I am with researching."

I took a deep breath. "I know you are but at the same time I don't want you to wind up hurt in any way—I don't want you to miscarry. I want you to put up a force field and stay behind it. Once they know I'm at the rune, they'll forget about you and come for me…let's hope that's how it will go."

"Exactly," Jen nodded at me. "So go."

"All right," I agreed, and then Jen went charging out from under the table even though I had told her not to, but I had to get to Chelsea. "You get yourself killed and I'm resurrecting you and killing you myself, Jennifer!"

When I got to the upstairs room, my eyes rested on an old, glowing tablet and I knew that this is where I needed to be. I smiled but when I reached out to touch it, Chelsea's hand shot out and she threw me across the room. I should have been expecting it since I was expecting her to be in the room, but I so close to the rune and I needed it—it held the key to _everything_.

I hit the wall hard and coughed. "Nice to see you again too, Chels."

"Come for your precious rune?" She asked me with a grin on her face.

I smiled and stood up. "Yeah, and with new powers."

"Yeah, I know you embraced your inner witch," Chelsea replied with a laugh, "but you can't stand up to the power I have now, Lan. You'll have to get over that, all right?"

I flicked my wrist and Chelsea flew up against the opposite wall, surprised, but not surprised enough. I tried to get the rune to fly towards me, but it was pretty damned impervious to magic and that thought made me feel pretty doomed. Knowing this now, I went for the rune, but felt a fist fly up into my jaw, the other vampires coming into the room, Jen following them and taking them out with grace.

"You think you can defeat all of us?" Chelsea asked, grabbing the rune and jumping out of the window.

I shot a fireball at a nearby vampire. "Jen…plan 'B'."

Jen nodded, and we shot fireballs at the vampires, hurrying out of the house and then turning around and looking at the house as it went up in flames. Then we hurried away from it in the way we thought Chelsea had gone, and the house exploded, the shock sending us both face first into the dirt. Then we both felt it—Chelsea's presence in the opposite direction.

Jen and I turned over and looked in the direction of Chelsea, and we all stared at each other across the flames since the house was no more than burning rubble now. She gave us a knowing smile, and held up the rune, and then with the blink of an eye, she was gone again. That was it…one wrong move and everything was gone again just like that…she was proving to us that she had gotten stronger and we could no longer deny that she was now a formidable foe.

"What did we learn from this?" I asked Jen slowly.

Jen lay down in the grass and I followed suit. She looked up at the sky and I ran my fingers through my hair, tasting the blood in my mouth and wishing we had come out better than we have. We were back at the beginning…except that we knew that now Chelsea was more powerful…and she was having fun testing us and teasing us. I needed to embrace the demon part of me and Jen and I needed to admit that we needed help on this stupid hunt.

"We learned that Chelsea thinks she has the upper hand," Jen explained to me.

I turned to her, completely surprised. "You called her 'Chelsea' instead of 'Chels'."

"You have blood on your mouth," she told me, looking at me too, and I knew she was choosing to ignore the fact that her not calling Chelsea by our nickname for her, was showing that things had changed for her too.

xx

I was relaxing on the couch when we got back to the house, and Jen and Kevin had gone out for dinner while Sam went back to looking for Ava, and I tried to figure out how to respond to a text from Kate. Dean had been occupying his time doing lots of little random things, and had even gotten out some Christmas boxes, which was really helpful whether he had realized that or not. The remote was in my hand and I was flipping through various channels while propped up on my elbow.

"Lanni?" Dean asked me.

I looked up and curled up more as he sat on the couch near my feet, looking at me like he had something to say. When we had gotten back, Jen and I had explained to the boys about how everything had gone, and then slipped into silence for a bit. Then Kevin had gotten her to promise she'd go to dinner with him and I had promised to look after the house and to never run off with Jen on a wild goose chase again.

I swallowed. "Yeah?"

"I'm sorry Chelsea got away again." He said softly.

I nodded at him. "Me too…"

He glanced at me and then took a breath. "Hey…are you okay? Because you've been strange since you got back."

"Yes, but, I can't believe how strong she's getting." I admitted to him slowly.

I sat up and turned off the television, sitting Indian style and Dean matched my position and reached out to touch my lip, and I cringed slightly. It was still rather painful—it had been cut worse than I had realized at first and though healing, it was still kind of tender. Dean frowned at my flinch and reached out to stroke my hair, looking me over and then resting his eyes back on mine.

"Did Chelsea do this to you?" He asked me.

I shrugged. "She's done it before."

"That's not the point," he told me with a sigh.

I took his hand and kissed it. "I'm fine…really."

He gave me a look. "Are you sure?"

"I'm sure." I assured him.

When I answered that, he pulled me onto his lap and softly pressed his lips to mine, holding me to him before he laid me down on the couch and then cuddled up with me, his head on my stomach. He ran his fingers along the material of my t-shirt in circular motions, and then I turned the television back on and we watched 'Stranger Than Fiction', and then 'American Dreamz' until Jen and Kevin came back.

"Right where I left you," Jen said laughing.

I shrugged and nodded. "We didn't burn the house down either."

Kevin smiled at that. "Perfect."

"How was dinner?" Dean asked them, making small talk since he actually genuinely like them and cared about whether or not their night was good.

"It was fantastic," Jen told us and then she smiled at him. "You know, while you're looking for Ava, you guys should get out by yourselves sometime."

Dean nodded at them. "Maybe…"

"You know, I'm kind of tired." I told her. "I think I'll head on up to bed. It's been a long day and a long night and I'm exhausted."

"Understandable. Hey…tomorrow do you want to go ahead and go by your house and check on things?" Jen asked me. "I mean we're still doing cookies at _your_ house, right?"

I smiled at her genuinely. "I would like that."

"Okay…goodnight." Jen told me merrily.

"Night, Jenny." I replied, kissing her cheek as she kissed mine.

I went upstairs and got dressed into pajama pants and a tank top, fixing my hair and making sure it was pulled back, and then I looked over at Dean's bag. It was just sitting there untouched, and so I opened it and pulled out the baby name book. He kept it under everything else, but I knew that he had one because I had found it a couple of months ago. He had a page bookmarked with a piece of paper with names on it he liked…and I had picked between his top unisex names and named Casey that way.

I got under the covers and looked at it, flipping through and finding names that I liked even though part of me was wondering why I was putting myself through this. It was only reminding me that this was something I'd never get to do…I couldn't _have _children…I couldn't _give _Dean children…he and I were going to be stuck just the way we were forever. I mean there were other ways to have children in my position, but I couldn't see Dean even _thinking _about that…I mean it wasn't like he _wanted _to settle down…right? Of course right.

When I heard footsteps coming towards the room, I hid the book under my pillow and snuggled farther under the covers. I certainly didn't want Dean to find me looking through baby books after everything we'd been through the last few days, and I smiled up at him as he came in and then watched him as he got dressed, smiling when he got under the covers with me and held me to him. He kissed my temple and nuzzled my face with his nose, smiling at me and then taking a deep breath, sobering a bit.

"You want a baby, don't you?" Dean asked me softly.

I turned my head and made eye contact with him. "How did you know?"

"There's a lump under your pillow…and I can see the book pages." He added pointing at the book.

I sighed and took the book out and then set it on the bedside table. "I'm always going to want a baby, but I…I want ours back."

"Lanni…" He said, and trailed off, taking a breath and then nodded like he was making a decision, "there are other ways to have a baby."

I blinked at him, sitting up and then turning to look down at him, completely unaware of what my exact feeling was right then. What was he saying? What did he mean? Where was he going with this? Why couldn't I get my words to work? Once he'd mentioned it after the Tiffany incident, but I thought he was just saying it to say it.

"I mean there's adoption…there are surrogates…" he told me slowly.

I smiled at him and kissed him softly. "Don't…I'm surprised and flattered that you've thought about procreating with me…but let's focus on killing the demon before we think about kids."

"I thought you wanted this…a more settled down me." Dean told me, sitting up and shrugging. "I mean I'm tried of this job, Lanni…and if I was going to stop for anyone…it would be you."

I kissed him softly, pouring myself into him because that was by far the cutest thing that he had ever said to me—the _sweetest _most _romantic _thing he had ever said to me. I wanted him just the way that he was and if that meant that he and I weren't having kids, then we weren't having kids. He wanted me, I wanted him, and eventually when the demon was defeated we'd come back to this…there was no use dwelling on it anymore…Dean was perfect. He was perfect for me just the way that he was and I was done feeling bad about things…I was done living in the past and being filled with regret…he was my perfect match.

"What are you doing?" Dean chuckled as my hands slipped down his body.

I shrugged a little. "I'm physically proving to you how much I love you, Dean Winchester. Now shut the yap and kiss me."

Dean chuckled again, but kissed me in response.

xx

Christmas Eve was amazingly better than I thought it was going to be. Sam and Dean weren't really into the Christmas spirit, but they weren't ruining it for me. In fact, Sam offered to help Jen and me with cookies while Dean helped Kevin to put the ornaments on the tree…or handed Kevin the ornaments so _he_ could put them on the tree. Jen got kind of annoyed as the night wore on because Sam and I kept eating the cookie dough and she was so OCD about it.

Then the boys and I stayed at my house and I loved that they didn't question me on what I believed—even though there were a few jokes from Dean. He honestly wouldn't have been him had he _not_ made a joke, and I was all right with that…it was my holiday and I was going to enjoy it. The best part about Christmas was waking up Christmas morning and knowing that I was going to get to spend the day with Jen…and of course Kevin, Sam and Dean.

"Merry Christmas," I said as I opened my eyes that morning, glancing over at the clock. "Up, up, up!"

Dean groaned and turned to look at the clock. "Not at 6 o'clock in the morning, Lanni."

"Then you and Sam can hang out _all_ by yourselves." I told him and got out of the bed, hurrying to get dressed. "Because it is Christmas and Jen and I have a whole morning planned before her parents show up to do Christmas with their son-in-law, and in-laws. So…up and at 'em, or make breakfast for yourself."

"Make breakfast for _myself_?" Dean asked me, turning to look at me. "Seriously?"

I shrugged and changed my bra, my jeans and panties already changed and Dean grunted a little which made me laugh. It was Christmas, and his present had nothing to do with my flesh, so he could grunt all he wanted, but he had two options and _only_ two options. There was only _one_ time on Christmas that I got to spend with friends and 'family' and that was Christmas morning, so when I pulled my shirt on and gave him a look, he sighed and nodded at me, making me beam.

"Fine…fine…I'm getting up and coming with you," Dean told me.

I clapped my hands excitedly and then I hurried downstairs and started to gather up the presents for Jen, Kevin and Jen's parents. Sam came downstairs before Dean did and kissed the top of my head, telling me 'Merry Christmas' and making sure I'd noticed that the cookies were gone, the milk had been drunk, and the stockings had things in them. I took a deep breath and I looked him in the eye, Dean coming down the stairs as I started to speak to Sam.

"You didn't…you guys didn't _do_ any of that…did you?" I asked him.

Sam shook his head as Dean said, "Why would we ruin this for you?"

"And that is what I like to hear. Now grab your coats, put your shoes and socks on and get moving!" I exclaimed, bustling around and making sure everything was together.

"She was born to be a mother," Sam told Dean and I knew he thought it was quiet enough that I couldn't hear him, but I could and I just smiled a little as I got things together.

"Someday I'll make her one then," Dean said and then cleared his throat.

What a confession…

Sam and Dean chuckled at my crazy and then we headed straight for Jen's, her opening up the door in a Christmas outfit, hugging us all, Kevin holding smiling at us. Kevin was _also_ big on Christmas, and he was glad that he was married to someone that was as into it as him if not more so…then there was me, the crazy friend that was almost religious about Christmas time. So we all got our coats off and slipped off our shoes, then helped the boys to get all of the presents assembled since we would get to them _after_ breakfast.

"Okay, it's time for food," I said and Jen smiled. "What should we make, Jenny?"

Kate laughed and I turned to see her. "Waffles."

"Anything! Just feed me!" Dean said and Sam rolled his eyes as I laughed, then stared at Kate and I ran over to hug her.

"You should be with your parents!" I told her, punching her in the arm. "Yeah, but Kat is spending time with her new boyfriend—not that boy she really wants to be with, mind you—and Mom and Dad are fighting, so after Christmas Eve dinner, I flew out on a plane to surprise you guys."

"Best…Christmas…_ever_." I told her beaming.

"Am I getting fed?" Dean asked again, his stomach growling.

"Well you hear my Caveman…he needs food." I told her.

Jen nodded and smiled at me, both of us heading into the kitchen and making a huge Christmas breakfast while Kate and Sam walked around outside together. Christmas at Jen's was always a pot luck, so she never had to do much cooking, so breakfast was a perfect tradition and everyone seemed so happy about it once they were all fed. Then we worked on the present exchange and Jen nudged me in the ribs with her elbow, making me look over at Kate and Sam all close to each other and all smiley.

"So is this Christmas tolerable?" I asked Sam and Dean.

Sam smiled at me and then looked at Kate. "Most definitely…"

"Good, I'm glad," I told them with a smile, "because you guys have to tough the rest of the day out with me and Kate, just so you know."

"I think we _might_ be able to handle that," Dean told me and laughed when I rolled my eyes at him. "Come here, Lanni."

I looked up at Dean with raised eyebrows when he stood and held his hand out to me, but I took it and followed him out of the room, smiling at him and wondering what was up when he handed me a small wrapped package with a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup on top and I laughed. It was definitely my favorite chocolate candy beside 100 Grand, and I was kind of surprised that he had gotten me a Christmas present…since he had said he didn't _do_ Christmas.

"But…I thought Christmas wasn't your thing," I told him softly.

He smiled at me and tucked some hair behind my ear. "Yeah, but it's _your_ thing…and besides you got me that new duffle with the new shirt and that damn expensive watch and I can't _not_ give you something after that."

"Wow, I love you." I said, setting the Reese's on the cabinet and then opening up the package, my eyes widening when I opened up the jewelry box. "Dean…how in the world did you even _afford_ this?"

"It's going to take all of the romance out of it, but honestly? I hustled some pool and then bought you the bracelet. Also, I plan on adding a charm to it each Christmas since Christmas is your favorite holiday." He explained and then sighed when I kissed him. "God, you're going to make this mushy."

I giggled. "I can't help it—you went all romantic on me and I'm gonna have to tease."

"So _this_ is what this love stuff gets me?" Dean asked me, smiling because he loved it even though he 'couldn't' show it.

"Baby…you bought me jewelry so I kinda have to start being all clingy and needy, don't I?" I asked him playfully. "I'm not really that girl…"

He smirked at me. "Okay, _only_ in the bedroom…that could work, right?"

"Merry Christmas, Dean," I told him, kissing him softly after rolling my eyes and laughing at his response.

"Merry Christmas, Lanni," He replied, and when he kissed me, I knew that no matter what, this was _exactly_ where I belonged…right in his arms.

**Note: Yeah, it was fluffy with a twinge of sadness…it's to offset all the angst next chapter. Now, what the eff is up with the rune? THAT…is a question that will be answered later, I promise. It is a BIG deal, and it has a major role to play. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	13. Meet My Sister

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Before we left a few mornings later to go ahead and take a lead on Ava, Dean and I had gotten dressed and were in quite happy moods until we went down to the kitchen and heard yelling. Thankfully it wasn't _our_ yelling, but at the same time it ripped me apart to hear _Jen_ and _Kevin_ fighting with each other and I sighed, motioning to Dean to stop moving and stay hidden.

"No, Kevin! I refuse!" Jen cried, and she was _definitely_ upset.

Kevin sighed loudly. "But Jen, I don't see why we can't have another baby after these! I just think it would be nice to have three or four!"

I made a face like I had been hit in the gut and Dean raised an eyebrow at me. Yeah, this fight was going to last for a while and it was definitely not our place to be here. Jen and Kevin were going to have to figure this one out on their own…and Jen was going to win the argument so Kevin was going to have to be a good loser about it.

"What?" Dean whispered.

"She only wants two," I whispered back. "That and she didn't want twins to being with—she's always had this vision of a daughter and a son and them being at least four years apart…she's already done."

Dean nodded at me. "Oh…well when we get there—and someday we will—how many do you want?"

"If we didn't have to go right now, I would _ravish _you…and for the record, that's debatable." I said with a smile on my face.

"Kevin, these kids aren't even born yet! You're not going to want more after them, just watch! I am _not_ a baby producing machine!" Jen said, and Dean and I heard some banging around of pots and pans.

"I think they might like some playmates," Kevin protested.

"Yeah, maybe when they're in kindergarten we can have this conversation again." Jen told him. "You wanted eggs?"

Kevin sighed loudly once again. "Jenny…"

"One more word about kids and you're making these damn eggs yourself," Jen warned and I went into the kitchen, Dean following me.

I was pretty sure Jen needed to have a relief in the conversation so Dean and I walked into the kitchen and Kevin sighed when he saw us. He knew as well as I did that they had definitely been yelling loud enough for everyone to hear them, and he was embarrassed about it and yet upset. I had known Kevin for long enough to know when he was annoyed that he had been interrupted—silly boy had wanted to keep fighting with Jen while she was cooking his food? Bad idea…

"Good morning," I said cheerfully, a smile plastered on my face, Dean standing behind me, hands on his hips.

"Don't pretend that you didn't hear that," Jen shot at me, but she smiled at us as Dean wrapped his arms around me from behind as I leaned on the counter. "You know, I think you're shaping up into a man, Dean."

Dean laughed at that. "Oh, so I wasn't a man before?"

"You know, the last time you were here…" Kevin began, but stopped because he wasn't going to talk to Jen about Sam and Kate even though Jen knew.

"She was what?" Dean asked him. "Helping Kate get with Sam?"

"Dean!" Kevin hissed but Jen waved it off.

Jen shrugged and glanced at the skillet. "I knew, Kevin. Don't worry about it. Wait…you knew and you didn't tell me?"

Kevin blushed and shrugged. "Well…I just…I didn't want to hurt you."

"So I was the last one to know?" Jen asked and threw her hands up into the air. "Like always!"

"Actually, _I_ was the last one to know about Kate and Sam the last time we were here." Dean admitted, pulling me closer to him possessively and yet gently.

I knew it shouldn't have made me as happy as it had, but Dean was jealous and he was trying to claim me as his. Honestly, that was what I wanted, and I was glad that he was feeling like he had to mark his territory—I didn't mind being marked by him in the slightest. He was my boyfriend, and he was possessive, and he was protective, and he was romantic, and he was cheeky…and all if it had an underlying care and love.

Jen looked at him. "When did you find out?"

"At the hospital," Dean told her. "I thought Kate was taking off, but she and Sammy were all looking at each other like they needed to bang and fast."

"Wow…can we not talk about this anymore?" I asked them all and then turned to see Sam come into the kitchen with Kate in tow.

"Guys, I'm ready. Thank you so much for your hospitality, Kevin." Sam told him and then looked at Jen. "And thank you for the home cooked meals, Jenny."

Dean nodded to her. "That was definitely a plus."

"You guys are always welcome." Jen said with a big smile on her face and then pointed at me. "Don't be strangers—I want to see this girl a _lot_. I want to see you too, Kate. Heading out with them?"

"Yeah," Kate said with a smile on her face. "We're going to do a hunt before I go back and deal with some things with Kalli…that girl gets herself into messes, I tell you."

I laughed and hugged Jen, Jen hugging me back and then hugging Kate, the four of us headed out to follow Sam's lead, which took us to Peoria, Illinois. During the drive I had been trying to tell Jen over IM that Kevin wanting more kids wasn't necessarily a bad thing—but she had every right to be annoyed since they didn't even have the first two yet. That was when she told me that she was certain we would find Ava. However, even with the missing persons report concerning Ava, we were at another dead end.

"Okay, thanks, Ellen," Sam said, and hung up the phone as I lay on the motel bed and looked up at the ceiling while Jen thought of a reply to the last thing I had sent her and Kate dried off her hair from her shower.

Dean came into the room. "What did she have to say?"

"She's got nothing. Me, I've been checking every database I can think of, federal, state, and local. No one's heard anything about Ava. She just…into thin air, you know? What about you?" Sam asked with hope in his voice.

"No, same as before, sorry, man." Dean answered.

Sam looked at me. "Do you have anything besides the lowdown on Jen and Kevin fighting?"

"Besides Jen refusing to have sex with Kevin until he decides not to have anymore kids just yet, I have nothing. I can't trace Ava anywhere, and believe me, I _have_ tried—I can't even sense her…I'm so sorry, Sammy." I told him lovingly.

"Yeah, Ellen did have one thing: a hotel in Cornwall, Connecticut. Two freak accidents in the past three weeks." Sam told us.

I looked up at him and raised my eyebrows because it sounded to me like this had to do with a hunt…not with Ava. Was Sammy honestly looking to do a hunt instead of working on getting Ava back? Why in the world would he do that when he had been so persistent with this? I mean I knew we were hitting dead end after dead end, but even so…Sammy never really went about finding the hunts when it came to him having emotional turmoil about something…

"Yeah, what's that have to do with Ava?" Dean asked, sitting on the bed next to me, making me move to allow the change in weight.

"It's a job. I mean a lady drowned in the bathtub. Then a few days ago, a guy falls down the stairs, head turns a complete 180, which isn't exactly normal, you know? Look, I don't know, Dean, it might be nothing, but I told Ellen we'd think about checking it out." Sam told him.

Dean raised his eyebrows. "You did?"

"Yeah…you seem surprised." Sam said with a look on his face.

"Yeah, it's just, you know…not the patented Sam Winchester way, is it?" Dean told him as I logged off and closed my laptop since Jen had logged off.

Sam looked at him. "What way is that?"

"Just figured after Ava, there'd be, uh, you know, more angst and droopy music and staring out the rainy windows. Yeah, I'll shut up now." Dean said as I laughed and Sam sent him a look.

"That would make a cute picture though, Sammy, you have to admit." I told him. "I mean you all broody and sitting by a window looking out at the rain, sappy songs on…that's hot."

Dean elbowed me in the ribs and Sam rolled his eyes a little, laughing and obviously flattered I thought he was hot broody. I knew I probably shouldn't have said it out loud with Dean right there, but I had figured that it was harmless because it wasn't like I was _leaving_ Dean for Sam. I was just pointing out that Sam was attractive in his own ways and he needed the reassurance since he was having a hard time lately.

"She's right…you all broody is a giant turn on," Kate said as she brushed her hair. "A hunt sounds good to me since we can't find this chick. Keep saving people."

"Look, I'm the one who told her to go back home. Now her fiancé's dead, and some demon has taken her off to God knows where, you know? We've been looking for a month now. We got nothing. So I'm not giving up on her, but I'm not gonna let other people die, either. We got to save as many people as we can." Sam explained to him.

Dean smirked at him. "Wow, that attitude is just _way_ too healthy for me. I'm officially uncomfortable now, thank you. Alright, call Ellen—tell her we'll take it."

"Did you come bearing gifts?" I asked Dean as Sam called Ellen my face lighting up as we played this little game.

Dean smiled at me. "Maybe…"

"Were they the coffee kind?" I asked him hopefully batting my eyelashes and sitting with my legs crossed, looking at him.

Dean shook his head. "No, but…they are of a good variety."

I raised an eyebrow. "For some reason, I just don't want to know."

I got off of the bed and Dean opened my laptop making me frown a little and at the same time laugh. Dean wasn't exactly the most technological person in the world, and he looked so cute confused that I couldn't be mad. At first I was honestly a little annoyed because this didn't seem like the 'surprise' he had for me, but at the same time, how can you be annoyed with someone as cute as Dean Winchester?

"What are you doing?" I asked him.

"I'm talking to Kevin." Dean said with a shrug. "How do you work this?"

I smiled and laughed. "You double click on his name and then you type to him if you're trying to talk to him on IM."

"I knew that, Sherlock," He said with a shrug like he knew what he was doing.

"Then why do you want to know?" I asked with a smirk.

Dean rolled his eyes. "What's this…right here?"

I knelt on the bed, leaning over to look, and then Dean grabbed me, and tickled me, pinning me to the bed as I laughed. He swooped in to kiss my neck, and I smiled at him when he pulled back and stroked my hair. I loved it when he was like this, and at the same time I knew that part of him as wondering why in the world he was being so adorable like this with a girl.

"You are something else, you know that?" I asked him softly.

Dean smiled and kissed me. "Yeah, I know."

"I don't know whether to be touched or offended by your PDA," Kate teased us.

"You two ready?" Sam asked with a laugh when he came back into the room.

I nodded and Dean got off of me, all of us grabbing our coats and our duffels and heading to the hotel where the deaths had been happening. It actually looked homey and I really looked forward to being in a hotel instead of a motel—especially an old one like this. At the same time…there was a presence here I hadn't felt in a _very_ long time and it was starting to make me a little paranoid.

"Dude, this is sweet. I never get to work jobs like this!" Dean exclaimed merrily.

I looked over at him. "Like what?"

"Old school haunted houses, you know? Fog, secret passageways, sissy British accents. Might even run into Fred and Daphne while we're inside. Mmm, Daphne…love her." Dean said his eyes a little lazy with want.

"Me too," I admitted with a laugh and a nod.

"I mean I guess I could get into that, but this is where you say that you love Fred." Dean told me. "That would make us even more compatible."

I turned to him. "Not that you and Fred don't have a _lot _in common, but see, I always wanted to dress up as Daphne for Halloween. Wear those shiny, purple go-go boots and everything."

Dean smirked and then winked at me. "Really?"

"Yeah, and it was Hella fun when I got to," I said playfully, turning around and following Sam and Kate up the steps.

Dean chuckled at that and then followed close behind us, Sam stopping me with his arm and then pointing. I looked at where his finger was pointing and noticed the pattern, and it looked familiar, making me look around once again. Something was going on here and I felt like I was connected to it…maybe part of it, but I didn't know why or how.

"I'm not so sure haunted is the problem." Sam said aloud.

Dean looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"You see this pattern here? That's a quincunx. It's a five-spot." Sam explained to him.

"Five-spot," Dean said as I looked up and then swallowed and slowly looked back up at the boys when I saw nothing.

"Yeah.," Sam answered.

I decided to focus on the hunt. "It's for hoodoo spell work, isn't it?"

"Right…yeah, you fill this thing with bloodweed and you've got a powerful charm to ward off enemies." Kate replied with a nod.

"Except I don't see any bloodweed. Don't you think this place is a little too white-meat for hoodoo?" Dean asked him.

"Maybe," I shrugged and then reached into my pocket and gasped. "Oh! I need to grab my phone out of the car."

"It's not in your pocket?" Dean asked.

I shook my head. "No, I must have left it on the seat after calling Jen. I'll be in, in a moment—don't worry."

I ran to the car and smiled when it was sitting there right on the backseat where I had left it, and I shoved it into my pocket and locked the car up. I swallowed though because the feeling of the familiar presence was _still_ there, and I turned to the hotel and looked up at a window, and I could have sworn that I had seen the face of a girl who reminded me of me. Shaking the thought away as the curtains closed quickly, I saw Kate coming over to me.

"I need to tell you something before we go into the hotel," Kate said with a heavy sigh.

Just the fact that she looked guilty made me look back up at the room where the curtains had shut and then I looked at Kate. She obviously knew what was going on here and I wanted more than anything to just hash it out with her right then and there, but Kate never did anything without a good reason for it, so right now we were good. Still…why did she sound guilty of all of the emotions?

"Your mother swore my family to secrecy and…I couldn't take it anymore. Sam got this hunt because I told Ellen to drop him the news about it to bring you here." Kate told me, shaking her head. "This is more than just a hunt."

"This is also my past?" I asked her.

Kate nodded and I chose to just nod too and then we went into the hotel just in time to see the woman who owned the place talking to Sam and Dean.

"Well, congratulations, you could be some of our final guests." The hotel manager said.

"Well, sounds vaguely ominous," Dean replied with a small smile.

"No, I'm sorry. I mean we're closing at the end of the month. Let me guess. You guys are here antiquing?" She asked them with a smile, trying to be hospitable after her little slip up before.

Dean smiled at her. "How'd you know?"

"You just look the type. So, a king-size bed?" The woman asked them.

"What? No. No, uh, no, no. We're…we're…two doubles. We're just brothers and we have companions coming." Sam added in a flustered voice as I laughed.

"Yeah," Dean assured her.

I looked at Kate, who was smiling. "You've been upgraded to sharing Sam's bed with him, Katie."

"Well, he _has_ seen me naked…" she told me, winking.

For some reason it was honestly _hilarious_ to me that people assumed that Sam and Dean were into each other romantically. Actually, I could honestly see it, but at the same time that was kind of awkward…it wouldn't just be _homosexuality_ for them…it would be _incest_. So…awkward…but for me, _hilarious_.

"Oh. Oh, I'm so sorry." The woman told them.

"What did you mean that we looked the type?" Dean asked, much more interested in knowing that, than being mistaken of being with his brother.

Sam stepped in though. "You know, um, speaking of antiques, you've uh…you've got a really interesting urn on the front porch. Where did you get that?"

"You know, I've no idea. It's been there forever. Here you go, Mr. Mahogoff. You'll be staying in room 237. Sherwin, could you show these gentlemen to their rooms?" The woman asked them.

"Let me guess…antiquers?" The old man asked.

Kate and I laughed a little more and went up over near the boys as Sherman started to lead them to their room. I went up to the woman at the front desk and gave her a big welcoming smile and she smiled back. Kate shared the enthusiastic smiles and then we looked at each other and then back to the woman.

"Welcome," the woman told us.

I smiled and pointed after the boys. "Good morning. I'm Lana, this is my cousin Kate—and we're with them."

"Oh!" The woman exclaimed and she blushed a little. "I'm Susan. I hope they don't take what I said to heart."

I waved it off and laughed. "It's happened to them before."

"Well I guess you can go on up then." Susan said with a nod.

"Thanks," I told her, and we hurried up after the boys, passing Sherwin on the way to the room and smiling at him. "I hope they didn't cheap out on you."

Sherwin smiled at me. "Not at all, Miss."

"Good," I said, and opened the door, going into the room and then sighing as the boys seemed to do their own thing. "So this is _super_ exciting. Who wants to go somewhere?"

The boys looked up at me, glad Kate and I were there and safe, and at the same time kind of annoyed that I was implying that they were being boring. Honestly, I was trying to shake off whatever was going on with me, and for that, I would need to keep myself occupied. To do that, I could _not_ do research—I could still be easily distracted by research and I knew it a little _too_ well.

"I thought we were on a case." Sam told me.

"Yes, but you two are…Dean is sharpening a knife and you're checking e-mail. That's pretty normal." I said with a shrug. "Maybe Kate and I will take in some sites and do some research at the same time."

"You seem…strange, Lanni." Dean told me, setting the knife down and coming up to me.

"Why would I seem strange?" I asked him.

He rested his hands on my hips and I smiled a little. "You're just acting flustered—at least more than normal."

I sighed loudly and wrapped my arms around his neck because I was kind of tired of keeping things from him. At the same time, I really wasn't sure how what I was going to say was going to sound coming out of my mouth. Still, if anyone was going to help me with this, it was Kate, Sam and Dean so there was really nothing to lose.

I took a deep breath. "Look…I saw something…something I can't explain."

"Welcome to the job, Lan." Sam said with a smile.

"Har, har, Sammy. I meant—never mind." I told him and rolled my eyes.

I kissed Dean swiftly and then I pulled away and Sam and I began to research with Kate while Dean looked around, and saw a dress displayed on the bedroom wall. It was kind of pretty, but it was also kind of awkward to have a random dress just hanging on the wall. Dean made a face and I smiled a little, feeling a little better, but still feeling like I needed to figure out who in the Hell that girl in the window was.

"What the…?" Dean asked, looking straight at the dress.

Sam looked up. "What?"

"That's normal. Why the Hell would anyone stay here? I'm amazed they kept in business this long." Dean said and I rolled my eyes.

"Alright, victim number one: Joan Edison, 43 years old, a realtor handling the sale of the hotel. And victim number two was Larry Williams, moving some stuff out to goodwill." Sam explained slowly.

Kate nodded at that. "Well there's a connection: both tied up in shutting the place down."

"Yeah, maybe someone doesn't want to leave, and they're using hoodoo to fight back." Sam suggested.

Dean nodded. "Who do you think our witch doctor is? That Susan lady?"

"Doesn't seem likely, I mean she's the one selling." Kate reminded him.

Dean nodded and I took a deep breath and I knew that there had to be something else going on here. I mean obviously _someone_ was behind the hoodoo, and there were definitely some weird vibes in this place, but I was distracted…why did that girl look _so_ familiar to me? Why did I feel like I'd sensed her before? Who _was_ she? Kate was going to get punched later…

"So, what, then, Sherwin?" Dean asked him.

I shook my head. "I really doubt it was Sherwin—the guy doesn't give off any negative vibes to me."

"Me neither—he's harmless." Kate chimed in, watching me.

"Of course, the most troubling question is, why do these people assume we're gay?" Dean asked Sam and gave me a look when I giggled and shrugged.

"Oh, you are kind of butch. Probably think you're over compensating." Sam told him.

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, a grin on my face. "I can _totally_ see that!"

Dean pointed at me. "You are _not_ funny right now."

"Oh, yes I am. Besides, Susan knows Kate and I are here so I'm sure that she thinks you're both getting laid…unless she thinks that Kate and I are lesbians." I told Dean with a playful shrug.

"That could be fun to play off…" Kate teased, both of us high-fiving and laughing as the boys looked at us rather surprised.

xx

I had wanted to check out the building, but I wasn't sure where to look so I was just at that place where I had to pick something and hope it worked out in the end. I mean maybe there was just some random guest that just lurking around, but she had looked so familiar…yes, I was focusing on the girl and not on the case. It was just _so_ strange and the presence felt _so_ familiar—like something lost…like something from my past.

Kate had told me that my past was here and maybe she was so familiar because she was Annie. That was a long shot because Annie was supposed to be in Wisconsin and then suddenly it all made sense to me—Mom had made Kate and the rest of the Newman family promise to keep Annie and me apart. That was why Kate had arranged this whole thing…to bring me back together with my sister, without breaking her promise directly.

"Lanni?" Dean asked me.

I shook my head and smiled. "Yeah?"

"You look out of it." He said, getting onto the bed and lying down next to me.

"It's nothing, just feelings." I explained to him, snuggling into him when he automatically wrapped his arms around me.

Dean nodded and kissed the top of my head. "We want to look around."

I nodded and kissed him swiftly, pressing myself up against him a little more than I should have. I knew we had a hunt to do, and I knew I needed to figure out if that girl was _really _Annie before I drove myself crazy, but he was right there being all affectionate and caring. When he deepened the kiss though and his fingers slipped down to the bottom of my shirt and started to go under it, I got off of the bed and smiled at him.

"Let's go," I told him, nodding when he groaned in protest. "I _swear_ I'll make it up to you later, all right, Baby?"

He sighed and nodded, getting up and taking my hand as I started to leave, turning me to face him and I looked him in the eyes. He looked really concerned and then he stroked my cheek, leaning down and kissed me again. There was so much care and love and want in it, and I just waited until he pulled back and looked at me again.

"You've been a little 'hit and run' with the kisses lately." Dean told me softly.

I smiled a little and kissed him again, wrapping my arms around him and pouring a little more of myself into him than I had been lately. He smiled into the kiss, pulling me closer, and then Kate knocked a book over as Sam cleared his throat at us and Dean and I pulled away laughing. We had a hunt to do and Kate and Sam were keeping us on our toes and we needed the extra help.

"Let's look around," I told him, and Dean kissed me again swiftly before we followed Sam and Kate out of the door and wandered around the halls for a bit.

"Hey, look at that: more hoodoo." Sam told us as he noticed a room.

"Look at that." Dean said, pointing out a vase with the same symbol on it as the urn Sam pointed out.

We went to knock on Susan's (the hotel owner) door so we could ask her some more about the hotel and about the deaths and I tried to focus. It was hard for me, but I was pulling it off and when Susan answered her door almost immediately, I was able to flash her a smile and make it convincing.

"Is everything okay with your room?" Susan asked us.

"Yeah, it's great," I told her, Dean trying to look inside the room which made her try and close the door some more, and I smacked Dean in the stomach softly.

"Well, I was just in the middle of packing, so…" Susan began.

Dean nodded and then something caught his eye. "Hey, are those antique dolls? 'Cause this one…this one here…he's got a major doll collection back home. Don't you? Huh?"

Sam gave Dean a look as I stepped on Dean's foot slightly and then Sam forced a smile as Kate tried to hold back laughter. He and I both knew this could be an 'in', but I understood Sam's frustration so I was about to make a decision Dean wasn't going to like but he was going to have to deal with it. He had brought this upon himself…

"Big time," Sam answered with a curt nod.

I smiled at Susan. "He's always buying me lots of them—best boyfriend ever, I tell you."

"You think he could come…we could come in and take a look?" Dean asked her, glancing at me since I had called Sam my boyfriend and taken him by the arm.

"I don't know." Susan told us slowly.

"Please? I mean, he loves them. He's not gonna tell you this, but he's always dressing them up in little tiny outfits. You'd make his day. She would. Huh? Huh?" Dean insisted with a big smile.

"It's true," Sam confirmed reluctantly.

Kate grinned at that. "Isn't that just the _cutest_ thing?"

Susan nodded a little. "Okay. Come on in."

"Alright, alright." Dean said happily, and we walked in. "Wow! This is a lot of dolls! They're nice, you know, they're not super creepy at all."

I coughed at that comment because they creeped me out a bit, but then I faked a smile as they looked at me. Dolls…okay, I had some when I was younger but I had one that talked once and it talked _without_ batteries…from that point on I was kind of weary of them. These dolls…these ones' eyes followed you wherever you went and I was feeling like I was suddenly being watched.

"This is creepy…" Kate whispered to me. "We should split and go with your gut instincts and let the boys handle this…"

"I suppose they are a little creepy, but they've been in the family forever—a lot of sentimental value." Susan explained to us.

Sam glanced over at the dollhouse in the room. "What is this? The hotel?"

"Yeah, that's right. Exact replica, custom-built." Susan answered with a smile on her face.

"His head got twisted around." Sam pointed out, showing the figurine with the twisted head. "What happened to it?"

Susan nodded slowly. "Tyler, probably."

"Mommy, Maggie's being mean." A girl around the age of ten said as she entered the room.

"Tyler, tell her I said to be nice, okay?" Susan told her.

I smiled at the little girl and how adorable she was and then I took the doll from Sam and showed it to her. Tyler looked pretty shy, and yet she looked so lonely…like she really needed to have someone to play with. I mean she was talking about a 'Maggie', but the girl just looked lost, and I wanted to help her.

"Hey, Tyler, I see you broke your doll. You want me to fix it?" I offered her. "Well…I could have Katie fix it."

Tyler shook her head. "I didn't break it, I found it like that."

"Oh. Well, maybe Maggie did it." Sam suggested with a smile and a small shrug.

"No, _neither_ of us did it. Grandma would get mad if we broke him." Tyler replied with a nod.

Susan smiled a little, stroking her daughter's hair. "Tyler, she wouldn't get mad."

Dean raised an eyebrow. "Grandma?"

"Grandma Rose. These were all her toys." Tyler told him.

"Oh, really? Where's Grandma Rose now?" I asked her.

Tyler looked at me. "Up in her room."

I nodded at that and realized that we now had a new lead—maybe Tyler's grandmother knew more about what was going on. Speaking of other people in the hotel…maybe that girl I had seen knew a little more about what was going on here too…I needed to figure it all out, and I needed to figure it out before my sanity slipped away from me.

"You know," Sam told them, "I'd…I'd…I'd really love to talk to Rose about her incredible doll…"

"No," Susan said quickly. "I mean I'm afraid that's impossible. My mother's been very sick, and she's not taking any visitors."

Kate nodded at her. "That's all right, we understand."

I pushed on the boys so that they would turn to leave the room, and then thanked Susan for her letting us look around. The boys and I headed out of the room and she closed the door on us, all of us looking at each other. At first Dean's eyes were giving me the, 'oh, we're talking later' look, but then I knew he'd already switched gears in his head.

"What do you think? Dolls, hoodoo, mysterious shut in grandma?" Dean asked us.

"Well, dolls are used in all kind of voodoo and hoodoo, like curses and binding spells and…" Kate trailed off.

Dean nodded in agreement. "Yeah, maybe we found our witch doctor. I'll go see what I can dig up on granny. You get online check old obits, freak accidents, that sort of things. See if she's whacked anybody before."

"Right," Sam told him.

"Don't go surfing porn, it's not the kind of whacking I mean." Dean smirked as I smacked him lightly but took his hand.

"I think I'll go with you, Baby," I told him.

He smiled at me. "As much as I'd like that, I think you should help Sam out—less temptation for me and besides…Sam's the best boyfriend ever."

"Hey, you were trying to make him look gay, and trust me—he's not." I said, and then grabbed onto his shirt. "But for the record…_you_ are the best boyfriend ever—for me."

"As much as I love you two while you're in love and all, who are you going to help?" Sam asked with a laugh.

I turned to him. "Kate and I have something to do, actually. You're both on your own."

Kate kissed Sam quickly and smiled. "Good luck…to both of you, I guess."

"I don't need luck," Dean responded, and then we split up after Dean kissed me tenderly. "I promise I won't die or get kidnapped."

I smiled and nodded. "Good."

With that, the boys went on their way and Kate and I slowly began to walk down the halls, me trying to figure out what to do next. The girl just felt so near and so I turned to Kate and I stopped, Kate looking annoyed that I stopped, but she knew me. She knew me so well and so she knew that this was really hard for me no matter what it was that I was trying to hide right now emotionally.

"I just—is it Annie?" I asked Kate slowly. "I haven't felt her in so long."

Kate pointed down the hallway. "Go find out what it's all about."

I wandered down the hallway a little bit and then I cocked my head to one side as I came to a room and the feelings felt stronger here—like I should open the door. I wanted to, and I reached out to touch the doorknob, but I pulled my hand back. I didn't know what to do because I knew there were answers behind the door, but what would I do when I got them? Why was I so scared to see what was behind this door?

I backed away, the feeling getting less and less prominent, and I looked out a window, seeing Dean talking to Susan on the steps as a man was carried away in a stretcher—a man who was also helping to shut the hotel down…I could feel it. I saw Dean coming up the stairs as I stared at the door I was so afraid to open, and I followed him inside our hotel room as he raised his eyebrow at me.

"You're stalling," Kate whispered to me, annoyed.

I nodded a little. "I know."

"There's been another one. Some guy just hung himself in his room." Dean said as he went to his duffle.

"Yeah, I saw." Sam answered.

I raised an eyebrow because he had obviously been drinking, and he was sprawled out in an armchair. The sight was really breaking my heart, but what was I supposed to do? He was feeling broken, and I knew that, but I couldn't fix that and he knew that…I couldn't fix his problems just like that no matter how badly I wanted to. Kate couldn't either, even though she sat down near him and gave him a soft smile.

"We got to figure this out and fast. What did you find out about Granny?" Dean asked us and I made a face because we hadn't really…gotten anywhere with that.

Sam made a face. "You're bossy."

"What?" Dean asked as he set things down.

"You're bossy. You're short." Sam added, and started laughing.

"Are you drunk?" Dean asked, looking at Sam.

"Yeah. So? Stupid." Sam replied and laughed some more.

xx

**Kate's POV**

Seeing Sam like this was breaking my heart because I had no idea what it was that I was supposed to be doing. He had been looking for Ava for a month and he was psychic and people wanted him dead because apparently he wasn't _entirely _human…but he was still _Sam_. He was still the sexy, hot, man that I had wanted to get to know better and now he was feeling like he was a failure and I understood that feeling better than anyone did—it came with the job and yet this was so different.

I ran my fingers through my hair as I laughed a little myself, knowing I shouldn't find it funny, but I did. I could have blamed it on the alcohol and right then I was, but at the same time I saw where Sam was coming from, and knew he didn't mean it. He was just drunk, and he was upset, and he was scared…I wanted _so_ much to make this better for him…how did I do that?

"Dude, what were you thinking? We're working a case." Dean told us. "You two should have helped out with him."

"We were taking care of something important," I reminded him, but to be fair…Sam was important as well.

Sam shifted in his chair. "That guy who hung himself…I couldn't save him."

"What are you talking about? You didn't know; you couldn't have done anything." Dean told him.

"That's an excuse, Dean. I should have _found_ a way to save him. I should have saved Ava, too." Sam told him slowly.

"Well, you can't save everyone, Sammy, even you said that." I stressed to him.

"No!" Sam told us, banging his fist on the table. "You don't understand, alright? The more people I save, the more I can change."

Dean looked caught off guard. "Change what?"

"My destiny, Dean," Sam replied and I swallowed.

Lana had been trying to keep me in the loop, and what John had said to Dean about Sam had really messed him up and now that he had gotten close to and lost Ava, Sam was really having a tough time. He had been hiding it pretty well, but I wished that I had been a little closer to him lately and helped him through the problems that he had been having. He was important to me and should have been able to have me when he needed me.

"Alright, time for bed. Come on, Sasquatch. Come on." Dean said, helping Sam to stand.

Sam opened his mouth. "I need you to watch out for me."

"Yeah, I always do," Dean replied softly.

"No. No, no, no." Sam said, struggling against him a little. "You have to watch out for me, alright? And if I ever turn into something that I'm not...you have to kill me."

"Sam..." Dean, Lana and I said together, our hearts breaking at the suggestion.

"Dean, Dad told you to do it. You have to." Sam replied, pleading.

Dean shook his head. "Yeah, well, Dad's an ass. He never should have said anything. I mean, you don't do that. You don't…you don't lay that kind of crap on your kids."

"No, he was right to say it. Who knows what I might become? Even now, everyone around me dies." Sam explained pain in his voice.

"Well, I'm not dying, okay? Kate and Lanni aren't dying, and neither are you. Come on, sit down." Dean told him, pushing Sam onto his bed.

"No, please, Dean, you're the only one who can do it. Promise me. Lan won't do it. You know she won't." Sam looked at me and then back to Dean. "Kate would never dream of it and so you're the only one who will do it, Dean."

Lana wiped a tear away, every part of me breaking too because I couldn't believe that all of this was really happening. How could Sam ask that of us? How could he possibly think that Lana or I would let Dean kill him if he turned? We didn't know what was going to happen and no matter what, I was keeping Sam with me—he meant too much to me.

"Don't ask that of me." Dean told Sam sadly.

"Dean, please. You have to promise me." Sam begged.

"Dean…" Lana began, not wanting him to do this no matter how drunk Sam was.

Dean swallowed. "I promise."

"Thanks. Thank you." Sam told him, taking Dean's face in his hands.

"Okay." Dean replied, getting out of Sam's embrace and helping him to lie down, me going over to snuggle Sam while he slept off his stupor.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I closed my eyes and tried hard not to cry, wishing that the pain swirling around in the room would just subside already. Mostly I just wanted to leave the room and hide away somewhere, not wanting to deal with what just happened, but Dean needed me. Besides…I was still definitely nervous about meeting Annie and I probably shouldn't be running around with no concrete purpose.

"You think that was smart?" I asked Dean as we left the room together, Dean needing to get some air too.

Dean sighed loudly. "I don't know…I _do_ know that I need a drink though."

I smiled a little. "There's a hotel bar—I won't be having any though. I'm cutting myself off until I figure out what it is that I need to figure out."

Dean nodded and I took his hand and we went to the bar, sitting down on the stools and Sherwin offered us a drink, but only Dean took one. I just sat there next to him and watched his every move, smiling to myself at how lucky I was. I mean he was just asking questions and working the case, but he was beautiful…he was just…beautiful.

"So, poor guy, huh, killing himself?" Dean asked Sherwin.

Sherwin nodded at him. "That kind of thing seems to be going around lately."

"Yeah…yeah, I heard about the other ones. It's almost like this hotel is cursed or something." Dean told him.

"Every hotel has its spilled blood. If people only knew what's going on in some of those rooms they've checked into." Sherwin admitted with a nod.

I turned from looking at Dean and smiled at Sherwin. "You know a lot about the place, don't you?"

"Down to the last nail," Sherwin said with a proud look on his face.

"I'd love to hear some stories." Dean told him.

Sherwin smiled some more. "Boy, you should never say that to an old man."

"No, really," I said genuinely. "We'd love to know."

Sherwin led Dean and I around the hotel, and the thing that caught my eye most was a wall on which were displayed some old pictures of the Thompson family. The whole hotel was old and it was well kept and it had history—it was beautiful. At the same time, there was a vibe here and it wasn't the girl I'd seen in the window…there was something dark here and I wanted to know what it was.

"This is little Miss Susan and her mother, Rose." Sherwin said as he showed us one of the pictures. "Happier days."

I glanced from the picture to Sherwin. "They're not happy now?"

"Well, would you be leaving the only home you ever knew?" Sherwin asked us.

"I don't know. I never really knew one." Dean admitted, and I took his hand, smiling a little when he squeezed it.

"Well, this is Rose's home. It's been in the family over a century. Used to be the family estate, and now she gets to live in some senior-living graveyard, and they tear this place down." Sherwin explained to us.

Dean nodded slowly. "That's too bad. I hear Rose isn't feeling well, either."

"No, she isn't." Sherwin agreed with a nod.

"What's wrong with her?" I asked slowly, honestly wanting to know what was going on around here and why.

"It's not my business to say." Sherwin answered, but he smiled at us.

Dean showed Sherwin a picture. "Who's this?"

Sherwin smiled at it. "That's Rose when she was a little girl."

"Who's that with her?" Dean asked as I pointed out a woman in the picture who was wearing a necklace that was in fact the hoodoo symbol we had seen on the urn outside.

"That's her nanny, Marie. She looked after Rose more than her own mother." Sherwin told us, and Dean thought about that.

All right so things were starting to be put together in my head—urn with the symbol, nanny with the symbol…obviously Rose knew hoodoo. So was she doing it? Was it really the _grandmother_ doing this? Right now it seemed like the only explanation…so we had to go and talk to her and that was the end of that.

"Thank you for the tour." I told Sherwin.

Sherwin smiled at Dean and I. "My pleasure."

"Dean…" I began as Sherwin left and Dean looked at me, taking my hand.

"Yeah?" He asked me.

I was having that feeling again and so I pulled him a little closer and he looked at me with a concern. I kissed him swiftly and he made a face because it was another of my 'hit and run' kisses, but I really wanted him to know that I was going to be all right. I just…I had to face my fears and I knew I could do it if he was with me.

I looked up into his eyes. "I need you to help me with something."

"Of course, Lanni—anything." He told me, stroking my hair.

"You remember when I told you I saw something?" I asked him slowly.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, I remember—I was actually listening to you."

I rolled my eyes and smacked his arm softly. "Very funny…I appreciate it. Look, I just—Kate said that she got Ellen to tell Sam about this case on purpose because she wanted me to know something my mother was hiding from me without breaking my mother's trust. The girl, I saw…I think she's Annie. I want to talk to her—calm my nerves."

"Well…okay." Dean told me with a slow nod.

I sighed, knowing he wanted more of an explanation. "Dean…I know what room she's in. I know that she's in there because I keep feeling her presence when we walk past the door. I know it has nothing to do with this hoodoo stuff, but I just—I can't open the door by myself. I'm too afraid to do it alone…will you go with me?"

Dean nodded, and I led him to the room and then I took a deep breath and Dean gave my hand a reassuring squeeze before he opened the door and we looked inside. It was homey enough, like someone had been here for a while, but the feeling wasn't that strong anymore—she wasn't here. Part of me was really glad about that, and the other part of me was disappointed…I needed her in order to have my answers.

"I—where is she? Her bag is still here." I said, going over to it and opening it up.

Dean made a face. "You sure you should be doing that?"

I just rolled my eyes and then I saw it—I picked up the picture and I gawked at it, looking up as the girl came to the door. She was beautiful, and she definitely looked more familiar up close. She was brunette, she had the most adorable round nose, and she was younger than me…and the presence was so strong with her standing there just a few feet away from me.

"Hi," she said calmly.

"Man…" Dean began, and he smiled a little, eyeing her. "I mean sorry we just barged in here like this, we got lost and—"

"Annie?" I asked when I found my voice.

Dean did a double-take and looked at me as the words came out of my mouth and the girl in front of me smiled. The tears were coming as she nodded slowly, and I didn't know if I could get my legs to move but I needed them to.

"This is really Annie? As in your little sister, Annie?" Dean asked me.

I nodded and he wiped the look off of his face and looked embarrassed to have checked her out. He picked up the picture of Annie, Mom, her Dad and I when we were younger when I dropped it on the bed. I found the will in my legs to move, and I slowly walked towards her, wiping a tear away as it fell. Yes, Annie and I were only half siblings, but Mom had pointed out time and time again that she was special too and still a witch.

"It's really you, isn't it, Lanni?" Annie asked me softly.

I nodded, tears in my eyes, and I hugged her, amazed that she was hugging me back and crying as well. I had spent all of these years thinking that Annie was dead—that _I_ had been the reason that my baby sister had been killed by a Shrtiga. Now here she was, completely and utterly in my arms, letting me stroke her hair and hold her to me—my little sister was very much alive and I was aching all over…but in a good way.

"I can't believe it's you," I sobbed, and then I pulled away a little, my hands still on her shoulders. "You're not, another vision are you?"

Annie laughed and shook her head. "Not at all—I found this hunt and Kate told me to go for it. Wow…you've grown."

"_I've_ grown? Look at you." I told her, hugging her again. "You're a woman."

Annie smiled when we pulled away, but kept grasping each other's hands. "I can't—I can't believe this is happening. When I saw you guys pull up, and I saw you, I couldn't believe it. All this time, I've been wondering when we would see each other again, and here you are. We're working on the same problem, I'm guessing. Kate's been dropping hints that you hunt."

"You find this case on your own?" Dean asked her, wanting to be part of the conversation but I couldn't take my eyes off of my sister.

"Yeah, but I don't really hunt much. I go to school and when I find wind of a case I want to do, I go for it. I…do you guys do this for a living?" Annie asked me.

"A 'living' would imply that we get paid and we do not," I said, laughing a little bit. "But uh, yeah…we kind of cruise around from town to town, vanquishing demons. The demon that we're looking for that was behind Dad's death and the death of Sam and Dean's parents, has eluded us for the time being, but we're helping people. How did you…?"

"I was on vacation actually. I finally moved out of my foster parents' house and…does it feel weird to know I'm alive and I know about you?" Annie asked me suddenly.

"Trust me, Annie, there are weirder things out there, believe me." I told her.

"I just—Mom didn't want me to tell you. After the Shtriga, she wanted me to be away. She thought that if she split us up we would both forget about our powers and not be hunted." Annie explained to me. "I, however, had to live with the knowledge of you being in pain and I guess…after being visited by Mr. Yellow-Eyed Demon, I realized that keeping us apart was just no longer important."

I looked at her, my eyes widening as I took that information in—that meant that Annie was like Sam, didn't it? Now I _really_ needed to know what it meant to be psychic because this was starting to get complicated and I was even _more_ involved in this. What the Hell was going on around here? Mom had been right…Annie _was_ special.

"Wow…you're a psychic." I said slowly.

She nodded at me. "Yes, but I'm not evil. The demon came to me in a dream and I told him to go to Hell."

"That's my girl," I told her, hugging her again and then pulling back. "God, I'm sorry—I'm totally smothering you with love right now, aren't I?"

"It's fine," Annie laughed. "After that these bad things started happening and so I moved out with a couple of friends, still close to Kate, Kalli, Kat and everyone, you know? I've been gradually trying to fit in and outrun the demon, and then this—now you're here."

I nodded at her. "Yeah, Annie…I'm here and I'm always going to be."

I held her to me as she came to hug me again, and I kissed the top of her head as she continued to hug me and talk. I just really couldn't believe that my little sister was back with me and that I was being given a second chance here. Things for me were _finally_ looking up, and I wasn't sure how exactly to deal with it all. I knew one thing though—I was finally getting something back for dealing with all of my bad vibes.

"I don't know exactly what is going on here, but it has to do with hoodoo. Some kind of spirit is here, and I don't know exactly what it is. I don't normally do this sort of stuff—the researching—but I can fight." Annie assured me.

I laughed at that. "You don't have to fight, Annie. It's all right."

"No, Lanni, I do. I have to help you guys. This is what you do." She told me.

I nodded as she pulled away. "I really didn't mean it like you couldn't, I just…do you want to stay in our room tonight? I'm sure that Kate, Sam and Dean don't mind."

"Of course not," Dean told me, and I realized that I still had yet to actually _introduce_ them to each other.

"Wait a minute…Sam and Dean? As in _Winchester_?" Annie asked, a smile spreading across her face. "From what I've heard about you from the two demons I've taken care of, you guys are amazing! Kate's here, huh? That bitch totally set this up."

Dean smiled at that. "Oh, it's nothing."

I rolled my eyes because of how flattered he sounded—it was like he realized that he had a fan. He just kind of grinned and then Annie looked back at me and he gave me a look…he wanted Annie to know who he was. I understood that, and at the same time I really just wanted to listen to Annie and see what had been happening with her. I could make it up to him later and he knew that, and he was going to have to accept my attention shift right now.

"Yeah, she set it up," I told her nodding. "I'm glad she did though. Besides, now you get to meet the two people I spend the most time with."

"And you…wow. You hang out with them?" Annie asked me.

I nodded at her. "Yeah—but don't be fooled…they're not all giggles and hotness _all_ the time. I met Sam and Dean at Chelsea's wake…"

"Chelsea's dead?" Annie asked me.

I nodded sadly—Chelsea, Jen and I grew up together, so it wasn't strange that Annie would inquire about them…or feel sad that Chelsea was dead. The thing was I wasn't going to let her mourn Chelsea for too long. She deserved to be mourned, but now she was a power hungry vampire, and Annie needed to know that in case Chelsea came after her too…and I wouldn't put that past her.

"Well yes…and no. She's…a vampire." I explained to Annie.

Annie's eyes widened. "Seriously?"

"Yeah," I told her softly.

"And how's Jenny?" Annie asked me.

I smiled at that. "She's actually married now—recently got pregnant with twins."

"Wow! That's pretty amazing." Annie told me with a smile.

"Yeah, Kevin just couldn't keep his hands off of her." I told her, and I yawned as she laughed, which made her laugh even more. "You want to get to the room?"

Annie nodded and held my hand. "Yeah…let's get you to bed, Missy."

xx

The next morning, I woke up early and went out to the couch and smiled softly. Annie had insisted on sleeping on it, and I smiled at her, brushing the hair out of her face and kissing the top of her head softly. I looked up as Dean came out, putting on his jacket, and he smiled at me a little, me straightening up and looking at him.

I put my hands in my back pockets. "Where are you going?"

"Out to get some breakfast," Dean replied slowly. "You want to come with me?"

"Of course I do." I told him with a smile on my face.

I grabbed my coat and Dean and I went out to go to a café, and we sat there, eating a bit until Dean looked at me. It was nice to be out with him and it was nice that he was glad to have me with him, but at the same time I knew he was kind of upset. I had spent the whole night talking to Annie and I still hadn't really given Dean a chance to get to know her—Sam had still been passed out and was actually probably experiencing a rather terrible hangover, but Kate was there for him and she could introduce him to Annie.

"So…how are you?" He asked me.

I shrugged but smile at him. "I'm—I'm amazingly okay."

"Really?" Dean asked and I knew he really wanted me to be okay.

"Yeah, I mean sure I ran into my long lost sister, and maybe you think this is some sort of scam by the demon, but she's—she's my sister, Dean. She's my little sister and she and Sam have something in common—they're psychic." I explained to him. "And…and I didn't get my little sister killed."

"You don't think…what if she turns like Sam might?" Dean asked me and I knew he hadn't wanted to ask it, but he thought it was important.

I didn't like where he was going with this and I sent him a look that said that. Mostly I understood where he was coming from because what John had told him was hanging over him, but she was my sister. I had thought that I had lost her once and I was _definitely_ not going to kill my sister…we still didn't even know what this 'turning' thing meant.

"Dean, if you're talking about killing my sister if she turns, you can take that comment and stick it—" I began.

"—Lanni, that's not what I meant." He told me, cutting me off. "I know better than that given I won't let anyone touch Sammy and I know you won't let anyone touch Annie."

I nodded slowly. "It better not be. Besides, someone who is attractive enough to get the Dean check-out shouldn't be talked about this way."

"Well you two have the same genes, and you know what I think about you," Dean said with a shrug. "Obviously you _both_ got the good genes."

"I'm going to take that as a twisted compliment…so…what did you mean?" I asked him.

Dean took a deep breath. "I meant that her coming out of nowhere—not that I don't trust her but—I mean she knows so much. Then again, she was with Kate, right?"

"Yeah, she, uh…Mom had been worried about us for a while. She's been in this whole thing pretty deep and after the Striga thing, Mom wanted us to be apart." I explained to him. "See, Annie and I are half siblings—different Dads. Annie's biological father was my father too for a long while until he was brutally murdered the month before I thought I'd gotten Annie killed. So, Mom had had enough and wanted us away from her to protect us. She let me think that Annie was dead so that we wouldn't be in the same place at the same time for anyone to strike."

"That seems heartless," Dean said slowly. "Letting you think it was your fault your sister was dead when she was living a good life."

I nodded slowly. "Maybe, but at least Annie's alive. Mom dropped her off with a family that lives just across town from Kate and her family, knowing that her sister would look after her own niece, you know? So she's been safe and protected and mostly out of the hunting game, but my Uncle Thomas—Kate's Dad that's married to my Mom's sister, Allison—wanted Annie to at least know how to defend herself and taught her things when she hung out with Kate's youngest sister, Kat since they're only a year apart. She's wanted to find me, but Mom said 'no' and she's the obedient one out of the two of us, that's for sure. Now she's here because Kate was tired of the secret being kept and wanted me to know and Annie to be able to see me."

It seemed like Mom had been going to great lengths to keep Annie and I apart and I wondered what that could all mean. Was she trying to keep Annie extra protected because she was a psychic and that could mean something bad? I mean I was half demon because of my dad and then Mom is finally happy with Annie's dad and he gets brutally murdered and then the Striga and Mom separated us…was this somehow _my_ fault and now all of these things were happening to me because of something bigger than all of us combined?

"Does she—in this heart to heart did you tell her anything?" Dean asked me hopefully.

I nodded again. "I told her lots of things, Dean. The only things I didn't mention were the relationship things. I told her about all of the demons we hunted, I opened up about Dad—your dad—and I—I told her she could travel with us if she wanted."

"Of course, we're not going to kick her to the curb, Lanni. You just found her, and you should be allowed to be with her." Dean told me.

I wanted to just grin at that and thank him and tell him he was the best, but there was pain in his voice. I hadn't told Annie about my involvement with the boys—about my relationship with Dean. It wasn't that I was ashamed of it—because I wasn't—I just hadn't wanted to lay _everything_ on her when she was just joining us and had so many things on her own plate as it was. Still…why hadn't I told her? Why wasn't I telling her how much Dean really meant to me?

"God, I owe you so much," I told him, leaning across the table.

Dean smirked and leaned in a little too. "Yes you do."

"I swear that I'm going to tell her everything, Baby, I just need time to ease her into everything, all right?" I asked him.

"Lanni, stop worrying about it, I understand—you'll tell her eventually." Dean told me.

I smiled at him. "I promise I will, but, hey, we should get back before Sam wakes up and freaks out that she's there, even though Kate's there too."

Dean nodded at me. "Very true…"

Dean and I hurried back to the hotel since he'd taken me to a diner for breakfast down the street, and when he reached for the knob, I took his hand. He looked at me, confused at first, but nodded a little into the kiss I placed to his lips, stepping closer to me and cradling me in his arms. I pushed my tongue into his mouth with ease, him slipping his fingers into my hair, and then he pulled back and kissed me swiftly, me nodding and the two of us walked into the room. I smiled at Annie as she ate a granola bar—we were alike in many ways—and then I sighed as I saw Sam leaning over the toilet bowl, Kate sitting on the bed with a magazine in her hand.

"How you feeling, Sammy? I guess mixing whiskey and jager wasn't such a gangbuster idea, was it? Hey, I bet you don't remember a thing from last night, do you?" Dean asked him.

"No, I can still taste the tequila." Sam answered, and Dean smiled, relieved that he had said that.

I laughed a little. "It's a good thing I didn't have any, otherwise we would have had a 'Tequila Makes Her Clothes Come Off' moment and that would have been bad."

"You know, there's a really good hangover remedy. It's a…it's a greasy pork sandwich served up in a dirty ashtray." Dean joked and smiled all cheeky-like as Annie chuckled at him, Kate giving him a thumbs up.

"Oh, I hate you." Sam told Dean, leaning over the toilet again.

"I know you do. Hey, turns out when Grandma Rose was a tyke, she had a Creole nanny who wore a hoodoo necklace." Dean explained, going up to the bathroom. "Ugh."

Sam ignored Dean's protest to the smell. "So you think she taught Rose hoodoo?"

"Yes, we do." Annie answered.

"Who was that?" Sam asked suddenly.

I smiled at that and sat down next to her, looking over at the bathroom door and then at Annie. I was surprised that he hadn't seen her since he had gotten up—then again it could have been that he only woke up to the churning in his stomach and needed to relieve himself of all of the alcohol he had ingested…and Kate, though very into Sam, would enjoy him coming out, seeing Annie and freaking a little bit.

"He hasn't seen you yet?" I asked Annie.

She shook her head. "He ran in there and has been there ever since. I—I felt weird just going up to him and asking him if he needed anything."

"Besides, I had it under control," Kate responded with a smile. "I was waiting until he came back out and then saw her."

Told you…

"Lan?" Sam asked me, wanting to know and everyone was letting _me_ explain it.

"Long story short for now—until I can explain it in length—Annie is out here, Sammy—Annie, my little sister." I told him. "Kate set it all up and now we're together and everything is good."

He was surprised but kept his cool. "Oh. I'm sorry you have to meet me this way."

"Trust me, it's all right. So…Rose and hoodoo?" Annie asked him.

"Alright, uh. I think it's time we talk to Rose, then." Sam told us, standing up.

Dean nodded at him. "Oh, you need to brush your teeth first."

"Yeah, no kissing until the acidic thing is taken care of," Kate teased with a wink thrown Sam's way.

I laughed because Sam had breathed on him and Dean was teasing but it was well deserved, and Sam gave him a look as he left the bathroom. Then I turned all of my attention back to Annie who was _definitely_ observing our behavior, trying to figure as much out about all of this as she could. She was aware that Sam, Dean and I were close, and though she wanted to ask what Dean and I had been doing and wanted to know where we had gone, she kept her mouth shut and Kate wasn't even teasing me and Dean about our whereabouts, so it was time for business.

"You sleep all right?" I asked Annie.

She nodded and smiled. "It was comfortable."

"Not as comfortable as a bed." I told her. "I should have let you have the bed."

"I got to catch up with you, Lanni—that was all I needed." She assured me, giving my closest hand to her a squeeze.

"No one thank me or anything," Kate said aloud.

I smiled at Kate. "Thank you, Katie, for finally letting me have my little sister back."

Kate made a mock annoyed face. "I'll take it."

I smiled and then after Sam brushed his teeth and got himself to look a little more presentable, I introduced him to Annie. We were all happy enough to have her along—even though I knew the boys were only acting okay with it for me—and I was really happy with them for doing this for me. Then when the introductions were out of the way, we all went to Susan's door, and I turned to Annie.

"We're kind of…we're going to pick a lock." I told her. "So…I hope it doesn't make you think that we're these wanton criminals or something."

"Please," Kate said, rolling her eyes. "The girl has hunted with _me_…"

Annie nodded and laughed, resting her hand on my shoulder. "Lanni, it's all right. I understand."

I nodded, and the two of us stood with Dean as look-outs while Sam picked the lock and Kate got ready to be a distraction as necessary. We honestly didn't need five people here, but that meant getting this done sooner rather than later. Annie and Kate even opted to stay behind while Sam, Dean and I went upstairs to see Rose and we found her, sitting in a wheelchair. Sam tried to talk to her, but she was unable to answer him. I was getting some vibes from her, but definitely not the vibes that I had been hoping for—Rose wasn't our girl.

"This woman's had a stroke." Sam said as I looked her over.

Dean sighed loudly. "But hoodoo is hands-on. You got to mix herbs and chant, build an altar and all that."

"So it can't be Rose. Heck, maybe it's not even hoodoo." Sam told him, giving up.

"You know, she could be faking," Dean suggested with a look thrown to Sam.

"Well, what do you want to do? Poke her with a stick?" Sam asked him and when Dean shrugged and got hit by me, Sam shook his head. "Dude, you're not gonna poke her with a stick."

"What the Hell? What are you doing in here?" Susan asked as she entered the room.

I turned to her and tried to pull my 'Lana smile'. "We just wanted to talk to Rose."

"Look at her she's scared out of her wits. I want you out of my hotel in 2 minutes or I'm calling the cops." Susan warned, and so the three of us left.

"You are the crappiest look-outs ever," I told Kate and Annie when we joined them.

Kate gave me a look. "What did you want me to do? Make a crow noise? Cause _that's_ not suspicious at all. Then again…we probably could have come up with something for her to help us with…"

"You think?" Annie asked her.

I was really worried about the fact that something was going on here but we kept hitting dead ends, and Annie looked troubled. She started to bite her nails which made me smile—I used to do that and then I took to chewing on my lip. We were _definitely_ related, and just that thought made me smile some more because I _really_ liked knowing that she was alive, and that she had grown up so well.

"That was strange," Annie said and chewed on her right pointer fingernail. "Something is still going on there…we have to stay around."

Sam smiled at her. "You are definitely Lan's little sister."

"Agreed," Dean said with a smile.

"So how _exactly_ did you guys meet?" Annie asked them, flattered that they had compared her to me.

Dean smirked and I sent him a look. "Well Sam and I were on this hunt, and we ended up at Chelsea's wake, looking to speak to her parents, when we ran into Lanni and in turn Jen. Your sister was wearing this amazing little black number—"

"—Dean!" I chastised, smacking his arm. "You are talking to my baby sister."

He just chuckled. "Yeah, anyway, she's been doing this for a while, and we helped her with a case, and helped her cope with Chelsea's…well death…and she just kind of became part of our messed up family."

"More like I forced my way in but you _loved_ it." I replied and then I shrugged. "The only thing I left out last night was that Jen and I got Chelsea turned. We still feel responsible for it—and we always should—and we need to figure out how to kill her before she gets too powerful."

"I'm sorry, Lana," Annie told me, taking my hand and giving it a squeeze. "I'll help you as much as I can."

I smiled at her and kissed her hand, pulling her into a hug and then letting her go when Dean got that look on his face. It was suddenly no longer kind of a playful moment and we were flirting with that line of 'care and share' and he didn't want to be dragged into it. At the same time, he and Sam were both _genuinely_ happy for me and it warmed my heart to know that they were both so supportive of me.

"So before we go and save the hotel…what's with you two?" Annie asked, pointing between me and Dean.

I turned to Dean and was about to say something out loud to her, but the wind rose and one of the seats of the swing set started moving near the hotel. The see-saw then the tourniquet also started moving by themselves, and so the four of us watched until the car started and almost ran Susan over, but Sam saved her. Kate, Annie, Dean and I joined them and went inside watching as Susan asked for a glass of whiskey.

"What the Hell happened out there?" Susan asked us.

Dean glanced at her. "You want the truth?"

"Of course," Susan told him like he should have known that.

"At first, we thought it was some sort of a hoodoo curse, but that out there, that was definitely a spirit." Dean explained, laying it all out there like she had said she wanted.

"Here," Sam said holding a glass out to her.

Susan stared at us. "You're insane."

"Yeah, it's been said." Kate replied with a nod.

"Look, I'm sorry, Susan." Sam told her honestly. "We don't exactly have time to ease you into this, but we need to know when your mother had the stroke."

Susan gave Sam a look. "What does that have to do with—"

"—just answer the question." Kate interrupted her.

Susan was still looking at us like we were crazy, but she just nodded a little and tried to remember. She was helping us even though she still wasn't sure that she believed us, and I knew it was hard for her, but I was glad she was trying here. We really needed to get to the bottom of this before anything else bad happened.

"Uh, about a month ago." Susan remembered and nodded in affirmation.

"Right before the killings began. You see?" Sam told Dean. "So what if Rose was working hoodoo, but not to hurt anyone, to protect them?"

I nodded at that. "She was using the five-spot urns to ward off the spirit. That means that the spirit is probably still connected to her somehow."

"She protected her family until she had a stroke and she couldn't anymore." Annie added with a nod.

"I don't believe this," Susan intervened.

"Listen, that car didn't try to run you down by itself, okay? I mean, I guess it did technically, but with a spirit—forget it." Dean said, rubbing his temples.

Kate looked at her. "Just believe what you want, alright? But the fact is, you and your family are in danger, alright? So you need to clear everybody out of here: your employees, um, your mother, your daughters, everyone."

"Uh, I only have one daughter." Susan told us.

"One?" Sam asked a little surprised.

I smiled and then shook my head. "I thought Tyler had a sister named Maggie."

"Maggie's imaginary." Susan told us, and the four of us knew then that we were dealing with Maggie's spirit.

Actually it was all starting to make complete and utter sense in my head. There were still some missing pieces but it was obvious that Maggie _wasn't_ imaginary, and that she was doing this. The question was _why_ was she doing this? Who was she, and what did she have against the people involved with selling the hotel?

"Where's Tyler?" Dean asked her.

Susan suddenly looked panicked and I couldn't blame her—her daughter was missing and we needed to know where she was so that she wasn't in any danger. We all went to go and find Tyler, starting at Susan's apartment where we found all of the dolls broken, and Tyler was no where to be seen. Kate was immediately in full on hunt mode now and she was the first to talk and I could see Sam looking at her with affection in his eyes.

"Susan, tell us what you know about Maggie." Kate told her.

Susan swallowed and pondered. "Not much. Uh, Tyler's been talking about her since Mom got sick."

"Okay, did you ever know anyone by that name?" I asked her.

"No," Susan replied slowly.

"Think, think." Dean tried quickly. "It could be somebody that could have lived here that might have passed away."

Susan's eyes suddenly changed. "My God…my mom…my mom had a sister named Margaret. She barely spoke about her."

"Did Margaret happen to die here when she was a kid?" Sam asked her.

"Yeah, she drowned in the pool." Susan replied slowly.

I nodded and headed for the pool. "We have to go now."

We hurried to the indoor pool door because Maggie's ghost would have wanted to bring Tyler here—she was feeling abandoned. Problem was, the door was locked and we couldn't get it open even though we were trying to. We called Tyler's name, and then saw Tyler look over at us, and then fall into the pool. Dean, Annie and I headed for the other entrance with Susan, while Sam and Kate continued to try and open the door.

I took a deep breath and made Susan, Dean and Annie take a step back, saying an incantation and then getting us inside. We got inside just in time to see Sam jump into the pool, me hurrying towards him along the edge, the others behind me. After a moment, Sam came towards us, Tyler in his arms, setting her down, unconscious. Suddenly the water came out of Tyler's lungs, and Sam looked down at her, smiling because he was so glad that she was all right—we all were.

"Can you see Maggie anywhere?" Sam asked her as she snuggled into her mother.

Tyler looked around and shook her head. "She's not here…she's gone."

xx

"I don't get it. Did Maggie just stop?" Dean asked us a little while later as Susan and Tyler got their things ready to head out.

Annie nodded slowly. "Seems like it."

"Where the Hell did she go?" Dean asked her.

Before any of us could answer, we heard Susan scream, going upstairs to find Rose dead. We called the coroners, and watched them take Rose's body away, joining Susan on the steps of the hotel. I looked up towards the room that Rose had once been in, and I smiled a little, nodding because I had an idea…I could sense them still.

"Paramedics said it was another stroke. Do you think...Margaret could have had something to do with it?" Susan asked us.

Dean looked at her. "We honestly don't know."

"But it's possible, yeah," Sam added with a nod. "Susan, I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. You've given me everything." Susan told him, and smiled brightly at Tyler as she came over to her. "Ready to go, kiddo?"

Tyler nodded up at her. "Yeah."

"Tyler, you're sure Maggie's not around anymore?" Kate asked her.

"I'm sure. I'd see her." Tyler told her.

Dean nodded slowly. "I guess whatever's going on must be over."

"You two take care of yourselves, alright?" Sam told them and Susan hugged him, which made me smile—Sam _needed_ to feel like a hero because he _was_ one.

Susan smiled when she pulled back. "Thank you."

"Yeah," Sam replied softly.

She nodded and then looked at Dean, Kate, Annie and I. "All five of you."

We all nodded at her and watched as she headed away with Tyler, Dean looking at Sam and I rolled my eyes—my man was about to be vulgar. Honestly I loved him that way, but at the same time this wasn't the time nor the place, but it was Dean…he picked his moments whether they were good or not.

"Think you could have hooked up some MILF action there, bud. Serious, I think she liked you." Dean said with a grin, and then Kate hit him. "Ow!"

"Is he always this vulgar?" Annie asked me as I wrapped an arm around her.

I laughed and nodded. "Unfortunately…don't worry though—you get used to it."

"Yeah, that's all she needs," Sam told Dean sarcastically.

"Well, you saved the mom, you saved the girl. Not a bad day. Of course, you know, I could have saved them myself, but I didn't want you to feel useless." Dean joked and then moved out of Kate's way. "I'm sorry, okay? Sam? Ravish, Kate. Ow!"

Sam chuckled because Kate had hit him again. "I like you more and more, you know that?"

"I'm a good catch," Kate said with a shrug and a wink at Sam, taking his hand.

I smiled as Annie looked the Impala over with awe as we neared it. "Are you feeling better, Sammy?"

"Yeah…but it doesn't change what we talked about last night, Dean." Sam said slowly and I swallowed—oh he _definitely_ remembered.

Dena shrugged at him, choosing to ignore it. "We talked about a lot of things last night."

"You know what I mean," Sam stressed, giving him a look.

"You were wasted," Dean protested, trying to get out of this.

"But you weren't...and you promised." Sam told him, getting inside the car as Annie and Kate followed into the backseat.

"Honey…we'll figure this out," I assured Dean, taking his hand for a brief moment before getting into the car after Annie and sitting next to her, and though I was worried when Dean didn't say anything, I knew he and I would talk more at the motel or wherever we ended up next when he got into the car too.

**Note: So, there's Annie and Kate is going to have a much bigger part in a little bit—something big is going to happen first though. You will learn more about Annie's and Lana's biological fathers soon, I promise. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	14. Dean Wants a Promise

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay so there was a LOT in the last two chapters.**

**This one is definitely shorter on new knowledge, but it's a long chapter.**

**It has a POV from Lana, Dean AND Annie too, so I hope you enjoy that.**

**There's still a lot to come, but bear with me.**

**=P**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Lana's POV**

I woke up a few mornings later to warm laughter and protective strong arms wrapped around me. I knew it had to be Annie's laughter, but I snuggled into Dean more and he stirred, kissing my back softly. Honestly I was _never_ going to tire of how amazing it felt to wake up to Dean…never. Especially when I knew how much he loved me, and how attentive he was to me.

"You still have to tell her," he whispered to me.

"How'd you even know I was awake?" I asked him, a smile on my face.

He chuckled. "I just know…but you need to tell her."

"I know. I was going to yesterday _and_ the day before that." I protested.

"Yeah, I know," Dean told me, "every time something else comes up."

"It's not like I don't want her to know." I told him, turning over and running my fingers along his lips.

Every time I went to tell Annie about what was going on between me and Dean, we'd get interrupted. Kate and Sam were actually discussing the idea of dating, not to mention the times Jen would call right when I was trying to get everything off of my chest. Then there were the times that we were interrupted and Annie decided that she wanted to run off and find something from her past since we were back in Kansas so she could bond with Jen, Kevin, Lance, and the people that Annie had left behind.

"I know," he said, holding me closer, stroking my hair. "You want to tell the world you have a man as wonderful as me."

I smiled and kissed him softly, loving this closeness and sweetness that was Dean in these rare moments. As he held onto me and kissed me, an aroma came into the room, and I smiled a bit, pulling away. Honestly I wanted to lie around kissing Dean forever and a day, but I was hungry and my stomach wanted food now that I could smell it. Dean grunted in protest, and I was protesting too, but the smell was making my stomach rumbly and I couldn't help that.

"You owe me, so this isn't fair, Lanni," Dean told me, stroking my hair and trying to pull me back to him.

"But…waffles…" I muttered, kissing him and yet still trying to get away.

He raised an eyebrow. "Waffles are more important than lying here and kissing me? You have some strange quirks, Meckenzie."

"Boo! You stopped calling me by my nickname, Winchester!" I told him, successfully pulling back from his mouth. "I _was_ thinking more that waffles give me energy but after that…"

"I think you need to kiss me and ignore your stomach, Lanni," Dean said softly, pulling me back to him.

I relaxed because he had called me 'Lanni' again, and I really wanted to be with him, but I couldn't help but laugh when Dean's stomach rumbled too. It was the morning and we both had a really bad habit of craving food no matter how much we wanted to continue this too. Dean shot me a look when I started to laugh, but he sighed and he nodded, getting off of the bed and holding his hand out to me.

"Let's go and get some waffles." Dean said dismally.

I laughed and nodded, taking his hand and letting him pull me up, kissing me softly and then letting me go. Then he looked me over as I brushed my hair a bit, running my fingers through it and heading for the door. He wasn't following though, so I turned to him and gave him a look—what in the world was he waiting for? Our stomachs were rumbling and it was kind of obvious that we were both _really_ hungry.

"What?" I asked him.

"You're wearing my clothes," he replied like I should have been aware of that.

I looked down at my clothes and shrugged, giving him a look—why did that matter? I was wearing one of my tighter t-shirts, over a bra since I never slept with people near me without one—strange habit I picked up years ago at slumber parties—and then a pair of Dean's boxers instead of mine. What was the big deal? I wore his boxers sometimes and he never made a big deal about it—he even found pride in me wearing his mostly even though it wasn't like I didn't have 'man' boxers of my own…

"Yeah?" I asked him, wanting him to elaborate.

Dean gave me a look. "Don't you think your sister will find it weird that you're wearing my clothes?"

"Oh!" I exclaimed and then I smiled and rolled my eyes. "Honestly, maybe _me_ wearing a pair of _your _boxers will break the ice and telling her you belong to me will be easier."

xx

**Annie's POV**

I smiled at Kate as she made the waffles, looking up as Lana came into the kitchen smiling. Honestly it felt nice to be around people that I knew, and I was glad to be in Lana's house—to be in a house that was familiar even though it wasn't the same one that had burnt down. This was Lana's home, and she had accepted me into it, and Kate wanted to make us all breakfast—probably because she was trying to impress Sam.

"You still like waffles, huh?" I asked Lana happily.

Lana nodded vigorously. "Yeah, and how are _all _my girls?"

"We're all terrific. Though, Kate is almost as vulgar as Dean…_almost_." I said, making a face at Kate and laughing as she nodded and winked at me.

Kate shrugged a bit. "I try."

I looked up at Lana and looked her over a little more, smirking just a tad because I recognized those boxers already—I'd seen them in Dean's duffle. I had a feeling that there was something going on between Lana and Dean, but at the same time no one _actually _told me that. I looked over towards the door as Lana went to help Kate, Sam coming into the kitchen as Dean sat at the kitchen table.

"Hey, Sammy!" Lana said merrily, kissing his cheek softly and smiling at him as he smiled at her back, their eyes locked.

Then there were times that I thought Lana was just being flirtatious and that was just how she was with Sam and Dean. Maybe she was merely close to them and that was it—maybe she wasn't in love with them. I just wished that someone would talk to me about something…even though I had just come into their lives and I _knew_ that Sam and Dean didn't trust me yet. Kate liked Sam though…that meant Lana would never go for him.

"You look happy and beautiful this morning," Sam told Lana, kissing the top of her head and wrapping his arm around her, "almost as beautiful as Kate."

Lana shot Kate a look. "Thanks a lot, Kate—you broke him."

Kate laughed and shrugged. "You can't blame the man for wanting to be on my good side. You get any sleep last night?"

"Yeah, I slept wonderfully actually." Lana admitted with a nod.

Dean cleared his throat. "Now that the 'good mornings' are out of the way, can I _please_ get some coffee over here?"

Lana, Sam and Kate all rolled their eyes as they laughed, and I couldn't help but take my time to look them all over. Even though I'd finally found my sister and I was glad to be around her, I felt rather out of place. My sister spent her time with the sweet, slightly paranoid, Sam Winchester, and the rugged, bad-ass, ladies' man, Dean Winchester, and had no romantic feelings for either of them? That was just ridiculous. There was some underlying relationship between all of them—they looked like they knew so much about each other.

"You think after breakfast I could go and see Dad's grave?" I asked aloud.

Lana stopped laughing at Kate's joke and turned to me. "Um…if you want to."

"It would be good for me, I think," I told her nodding. "Haven't visited it in ages."

"Then I guess after waffles we'll all get dressed and go and do just that," Lana announced with a small smile and nod.

I nodded and helped Kate to set the table as Sam kissed her and I nodded once again—yeah, Kate had complete dibs on Sam. So were Dean and Lana sleeping together? I knew I didn't have a right, but I wanted to be able to give him a talking to about my sister's feelings…see if his intentions were honorable and all that jazz. Dean actually sometimes seemed like he had a soft spot which wasn't like men like him…then again, I really knew nothing about Sam and about Dean.

"You going to look into the Ava thing some more, today?" Kate asked Sam, handing him a plate to help her.

Sam shrugged a little bit. "A little bit. I think on that front there's really nothing else to do, but I'm still worried."

Kate nodded and when everyone had sat down at the dining room table, I looked over at Lana, who had chosen to sit across from me and next to Dean. Their chairs seemed pretty close together, and though not mad, I wanted to know what was going on. I wanted to know how deep her sister was with these people, and I wanted to make sure that she was safe…that Sam and Dean would protect her with their lives.

"You want us to go with you guys after breakfast?" Dean asked Lana.

Lana turned to him. "That's okay, honey, we'll be fine with just the girls."

He smiled and nodded, and I knew there was something else behind that smile—love, care…mostly love. Were they together, or did they just pine after each other? What was going on between them? Why couldn't one of them just tell me?

"Annie, you haven't eaten any waffles," Lana said suddenly, a little bit of worry on her face like a momma bear.

I smiled, pulled out of my thoughts. "I was just distracted."

xx

**Lana's POV**

Right after breakfast Annie went into the downstairs guest room and got ready to go while Dean and I went upstairs to change. I was slightly worried about Annie seeing the grave of her niece or nephew when she didn't know about Dean and me yet, but at the same time, maybe it was time to talk to her about it. Maybe now was as good a time as ever to explain the Dean thing to her…to let her _all_ the way into my life again.

"You okay?" Dean asked me.

I nodded and looked at my reflection in the mirror. "Yeah, I just—going to the cemetery…"

"It's your chance to tell her," Dean told me, wrapping his arms around me after I pulled a clean shirt on.

"I know." I replied, leaning back into him. "I know."

He kissed my head. "So go and help your sister cope."

I turned around to look at him and smiled, peering into the deep eyes that peered back into mine. He was definitely a little hurt still, but he was trying not to let it show—in fact if I didn't know him so well, I wouldn't know now. The thing was though, that I knew Dean really well…and he knew me and that was what made us so compatible.

"I love you." I told him.

"I know you do," Dean said, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear.

I smiled, kissed him swiftly, and then went out of the room and went downstairs, smiling as Annie looked up at me and gave me a smile of her own. Then we saw Kate grab her coat and the three of us headed out the front door and walked down to the cemetery, pretty much in silence. When we got there, I stood in front of Casey's grave, and Annie knelt by her Dad's, Kate staying near both of us to give us both the support that we needed. This was something she thought she needed to do and I _completely_ understood her, and I smiled down at her fondly.

"Can you give me a minute?" Annie asked me suddenly.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…sure."

xx

**Annie's POV**

I watched as Lana slowly walked away, her eyes resting on the headstone she was covering with the name 'Casey Morgan Winchester' on it. I didn't know quite what to think about it…I mean I'd heard about Sam and Dean, but who was Casey? Their dad was John—I knew that much—and then she saw it: "Beloved Child". Could it be that Lana was closer to Sam and/or Dean than I thought previously?

"Hey, Dad," I said after a pause and a swallow. "I'm here. I'm back with Lanni. I—I guess I feel bad I haven't been here since the fire. I listened to what you said: I waited, and Lanni came to me. This doesn't mean that I have to—will the demon use me as a soldier? I wish so often that you were still here. How else am I going to get through this without you? What did you tell Lanni when you left? What—"

I stopped and sighed—I wasn't sure why I was still asking all these questions when I wasn't sure quite what I wanted to know anymore. Besides, I knew that he couldn't speak back, and so all of my questions were rather empty.

"I love you, Daddy…and I forgive you. I forgive you for separating everything." I told them with a nod.

Standing up, I gave one last look at the graves and then took another look at the smaller headstone near them. This was the perfect icebreaker for Lana and me, and yet there was still that nagging voice in the back of my head that told me that it wasn't my place to pry…that told me that she would tell me when she told me.

"I'll figure it out, Casey," I said aloud and then walked over to Lana who grasped my hand, and then Kate smiled.

"You want some junk food to eat while we watch a movie?" Lana asked me.

I smiled at her. "Sure."

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Annie?" I asked, knocking on the downstairs guestroom.

"Yeah?" She answered tiredly.

"I need to talk to you." I told her slowly.

We had come home and watched some movies, and then she had gone to bed and I was tired of hiding everything. I had wanted to just snuggle up with Dean, but he was keeping his space, and I still needed to talk to Annie about the headstone she'd seen. This was hard for me and I knew that Annie was feeling pretty left out, so I had to make this easier for her…I had to make her feel like she was still my sister, no matter how many years we'd lost together. Annie opened the door and motioned for me to come into her room, crawling back under the covers and then looked at me.

"What is it, Lanni?" Annie asked me.

I took a deep breath. "The headstone you saw today…I lost a baby."

"I figured," Annie said with a nod.

"I'm sorry I never told you. I just—I didn't know how to bring it up." I explained to her and sighed. "God, I _know_ that's not an excuse, but I just…there's so much to tell you and I didn't know if you were going on information overload already or not. I'm really sorry."

Annie nodded at me and patted the bed next to her, me sitting down on it and putting my arm around her. She leaned into me, her head on my shoulder, and I smiled at her—I wanted her to feel this comfortable with me _all_ the time. It was time to let every wall I had up, down, and I felt comfortable with her, so why had I waited this long?

"It's okay, you know." Annie told me. "I wouldn't know how to tell you if that had happened to me."

"Is there anything…are we all right?" I asked her.

Annie nodded at me. "Yes…but…Lanni…who was Casey's father?"

"Oh, Dean," I answered with a blush. "Dean and I are dating, and I'm in love with him. Sorry, I should have started with that. We conceived the baby, we were dealing with things, Chelsea shot me, and I lost the baby…Dean and I are still very much together, and—"

"—Chelsea's here." Sam said suddenly, coming into Annie's room.

Annie blushed and pulled the covers up around her even though she was clothed, and I smiled at her and stood up. I headed towards Sam, getting up off of Annie's bed, and I opened my mouth to say something to him when Annie cut in. Annie was going to be pro-active, and I was going to let her be just that.

"Sam, I kind of need to get dressed," Annie told him. "So, uh…you're gonna have to leave."

Sam nodded and blushed, and then Annie pulled a sweatshirt over her tank top and I started to laugh. She gave me a look and I just waved it off and then the two of us headed outside of the house. Chelsea was standing there, smiling at us, the moonlight hitting the red of her hair.

"So…the little Meckenzie is alive, huh?" Chelsea asked with a nod. "Too bad it won't be for long."

I opened my mouth to say something, but Annie narrowed her eyes at Chelsea and Chelsea went flying. I was freaking out a little, honestly feeling scared and I didn't know why, I just…where the Hell had she learned that? I mean _I_ didn't even know how to do that…maybe she was just more focused than me? Did it have to do with her being psychic at all? You'd think that a half demon could do that…then again, I was still totally not practiced.

"Annie…how the Hell did you do that?" I asked her.

Annie turned to me. "I'm psychic, Lanni…remember?"

I nodded slowly. "I remember."

"Wow…you have some punch in you." Chelsea said, getting up and wiping blood off of her mouth.

As worried as I was about what I had just seen, I knew I had to focus on Chelsea because she was a threat. Besides, I could get to Annie later—right then Chelsea was making her way towards us and I was worried about a little _too_ much. I wanted everything to be fine, but at the same time I knew that where Chelsea was concerned, _nothing_ was fine…and I still didn't know _how_ to kill her once and for all.

"Leave Annie alone, Chelsea. Your fight is with me." I told her, getting in between her and Chelsea.

"It's okay, Lanni…if Chelsea wants to fight me, she can," Annie said, sending Chelsea into another tree.

I firmly stood my ground, wishing that there was a way to get out of this _without_ Annie using her powers. It seemed to me that Annie using her powers was doing us more harm than good, and though she didn't understand that, I was starting too. Chelsea needed to go and she needed to go right then and there without any casualties…she needed to go and stay gone long enough for me to figure out how to kill her once and for all.

"You haven't seen the last of me," Chelsea said, and she disappeared into thin air practically which made me wonder…why did she go so easily?

"Now she's knows I'm alive," Annie told me, and I just nodded and took her hand when she reached out for mine, both of us heading inside and running into Sam.

Sam took a deep breath. "We have another case—we have to go."

xx

"Helena was our top buyer. She was like…family, you know?" The owner of the jewelry store told Sam and I.

Sam and I had come to talk to the owner while Kate and Dean talked to the girl who ran the jewelry counter. At first I was kind of pissed about that, but Kate had it all under control in case Dean got out of hand and hit on the girl back. She was _definitely_ eyeing my man, and I was _not_ going to take that lying down…except I kind of was.

"She said it herself, every year at the Christmas party. We were the only family she had." The man continued with a sad nod.

Sam nodded at him. "So there were never any signs?"

"No. I still can't believe it, even now. Helena came back to the store late that night after closing—cleaned out all the display cases, the safe—Edgar, our Nightwatchman—he caught her in the act. He didn't know what to do. He'd known her for years. He called me at home…" The man explained, trailing off.

"That's when she took his gun…" I chimed in slowly.

"She shot him in the face…I heard him die…" The man said suddenly, "over the phone."

I felt really bad for the man, but at the same time I was distracted by the woman over with Dean and Kate, hitting on him. Kate was cutting into part of their conversation and even put her hand on Dean's shoulder as he chuckled awkwardly…what was going on? I really needed to know what was going on and maybe reach over the counter and punch that smile off of that woman's face…

"Any idea what would have made her do it?" Sam asked him.

"What motive? It makes no sense." He replied, shaking his head. "Why steal all those diamonds, all that jewelry and then what? Just dump it somewhere? Just hide it and then go home…and kill herself?"

I looked at him. "What about the security camera footage?"

"I wouldn't know." The man admitted.

"So you never saw the footage yourself then?" Sam asked as Kate and Dean joined us.

The man shook his head. "The police—they took all the tapes first thing."

"Yeah, of course they did," Dean said, looking at a piece of paper in his hand and then looking at us.

"Thanks for your time." I told the owner, and he nodded.

We all went out to the car and Dean ripped up the piece of paper and dropped it onto the ground. I bent down to pick it up, sighing, but Dean stopped my hands and shook his head, sending me a look when I pouted at him.

"You're littering and I'm not going to tolerate it." I explained to him.

Dean pulled me close to him. "It's fine, just leave it."

"Was that…her _number_?" I asked him, gasping a little and then kissing him. "You ripped it up because you _love _me."

"Lanni, not in front of Sam and Kate…" Dean told me, groaning a little but returning the kisses I placed on his mouth.

Kate laughed loudly. "The girl was pretty much throwing herself at him…but he didn't stop the flirting."

"He wouldn't," I laughed, but kissed him again as Annie opened up the door in the backseat. "At the same time, annoyed as I am, I love that he ripped it up."

"Okay, enough PDA please…we have a case." Sam said and then laughed and shook his head when I kissed Dean one more time, only a little longer, and then pulled away and got into the backseat.

Dean looked pretty pleased with himself and got into the driver's seat, turning the engine over and heading out onto the road. We drove along for a couple minutes before we came to another bank that had been robbed in a similar fashion a while before, so we went to investigate it. Unfortunately, just like at the other place, the security tapes had been confiscated and we needed them to do our job.

"Freaking cops," Dean muttered, turning off the car.

Sam sent him a look. "They're just doing their job."

"No they're doing _our_ job. They just don't know it, so they suck at it." Dean replied with a sigh.

"I think you're being too hard on them." Annie told him. "They don't know what we know."

Dean shrugged and got out of the car. "Talk to me about this bank."

"Um, Milwaukee National Trust—hit about a month ago." Sam answered, getting out himself.

"Same M.O. as the jewelry store?" Dean asked.

Kate nodded at him. "Yeah. Inside job, longtime employee—the 'never in a million years' type."

"Dude robs the bank then goes home and supposedly commits suicide." Sam added with a nod.

"This guy Resnick, he was the security guard on duty?" Dean asked us.

I nodded at him. "Yeah, he was actually beaten unconscious by the teller who heisted the place. Kate calls staying in the car this time because she thinks Kalli might need her to bail on this one."

"Really? Again?" Annie asked her.

"It doesn't seem serious, but I like being with her when she's having issues." Kate said with a shrug. "I'd be back, Sammy."

"I know," he told her, smiling a bit.

I smiled at them and then we left Kate in the car to make her calls, Sam knocking on the door as the four of us stopped on the porch. I tugged on Dean's blazer and he turned to me, letting me make sure he was fixed as Sam called for Ronald Resnick. Dean pretended for a moment that he was annoyed, but he smiled at me and then leaned in for a kiss, me leaning up and meeting him the rest of the way, pulling away when Annie knocked. Then the porch light came on, and it was _incredibly_ bright and directly in our faces.

"Son of a—" Dean said and then Ronald showed himself to us and came to the glass door, peering at us expectantly.

Sam spoke up first. "FBI, Mr. Resnick."

"Let me see your badges," Ronald said.

The four of us opened up our fake badges and placed them on the glass door for him to see them. He looked over all of them and nodded—thankfully he believed us—and then he looked up at us. He was convinced, but at the same time he was weary of us, and I could honestly understand that.

"I already gave my statement to the police." Ronald told us.

"Yeah, listen, Ronald, um, just some things about your statement we want to get come clarification on." Dean explained to him.

Ronald looked surprised. "You read it?"

"Sure did." Dean said with a nod.

"Come to listen to what I gotta say?" Ronald asked us.

Annie smiled at him. "Well that's why we're here."

"Come on in," Ronald said, excited someone was listening to him.

"Interesting house…" I whispered to Dean.

Dean nodded and ran his hand down my back to my posterior. "Think they'd miss us for two moments?"

"Not the time, Dean," I whispered back with a smile, "but I'm sure we could steal the room for a bit when we get back."

"See, none of the cops ever called me back—not after I told them what was really going on. They all thought I was crazy." Ronald explained, showing us to a room. "First off, Juan Morales didn't rob the Milwaukee National Trust, okay. That I guarantee. Me and Juan were friends. He used to come back to the bank on my night shifts, and we'd play cards."

Sam nodded slowly. "So _you_ let him into the bank that night, after hours?"

"The thing I let into the bank…wasn't Juan. I mean it had his face, but it wasn't _his_ face." Ronald said as Annie and I exchanged glances slowly. "Every feature on his face was perfect, but _too_ perfect, you know? Like a doll maker made it—like I was talking to a big Juan doll."

"A Juan doll?" Sam asked skeptically.

I smiled at him because I had a feeling that Ronald had an idea of what he was talking about, but at the same time…I was worried. The guy was snooping and I was worried about what kind of trouble that would get him into if he continued it. Still, I listened for more of his story, because that _was_ why we were there.

Ronald looked up from his papers. "Look, something like this has happened before too. There was this jewelry store too, and I mean the cops and you guys. You—you just won't see it." Ronald said as Sam flipped through the folder. "Both crimes were pulled by the same thing."

"What's that, Mr. Resnick?" Sam asked him calmly.

"The Chinese have been working on it for a while, and the Russians before that. Part man, part machine. Like the Terminator—but the kind that can change itself." Ronald said, almost excitedly, which made me crack a smile. "Like into other people."

"Like the one from 'T2'." Dean put in with a smile.

"Exactly!" Ronald told Dean, and Sam sent him a look and me, so I wiped the smile off.

Even though Dean didn't always know what he was talking about when it came to research and things, he knew movies. My man was a movie buff and I thought it was adorable…considering I had been certain when he had gone to movies, he had a lady attached to him so why watch it?

"See, so not just a robot. More of a—a—a—a Man-Droid!" Ronald exclaimed and then he gave us an enthusiastic nod.

"A Man-Droid?" Sam asked again.

"Now what makes you so sure about this, Ronald?" Annie asked.

Ronald motioned for us to have a seat, and he pulled out a tape and put it into the VCR. "See, I made copies of all of the security tapes. I knew that once the cops got them, they'd be buried. Here. Now watch—watch—watch him—watch, watch! See! Look! There it is! He's got the laser eyes!"

When Ronald paused the tape to show us, I nodded because we all knew we were dealing with another shape shifter. We couldn't tell Ronald that though…could we? I mean he knew that something was up and he knew that something was wrong but he just _wasn't_ a hunter, he just wasn't, and I didn't want to be responsible for getting him killed.

"Cops said it was some sort of reflected light. Some sort of 'camera flare'." Ronald explained, using his fingers. "Okay? Ain't no damn camera flare! They say I'm a post trauma case. So what? The bank goes and fires me. It don't matter. The Man-Droid is still out there. If the law won't hunt this thing down, then I will."

I smiled at him softly. "That's pretty noble, there, Ronald. Tell us more about this…this Man-Droid."

He smiled a little too. "You see this thing, it—it—it—it kills the real person, makes it look like a suicide, then it sort of like, morphs into that person, cases the job for a while until the take is fat, and then finds its opening. Now these robberies, they're all grouped together. So I figure that the Man-Droid is hold up somewhere in the middle—maybe underground—I don't know. Maybe—maybe that's where it recharges its—its—M-Man-Droid batteries."

Dean, Annie and I figured that for a clueless man, this was pretty amazing, and we gave slight looks of approval. It was just that I knew how Sam felt, and so when I saw the look on his face, I knew that he wasn't really looking to give Ronald the kind of approval that Annie, Dean and I were willing to give him. Ronald deserved points for his intelligence, but there was definitely no way that I wanted him out there in the middle of hunt either, so I was siding with Sam's feelings…just hoping Sam wouldn't crush Ronald's too bad and maybe let _me_ deliver the blow.

"Okay," Sam said slowly.

"Sam…" Annie began, both of us knowing what that 'okay' sounded like, but he ignored her.

"I want you to listen very carefully, 'cause I'm about to tell you the God honest truth." Sam said, all of us standing up and Ronald getting excited, Dean thinking Sam was going to be truthful. "There's no such thing as Man-Droids. There's nothing evil or inhuman going on out there. It's just people." He said, and Ronald's face and all of ours really, got a little sadder. "Nothing else, you understand?"

"The laser eyes—" Ronald said desperately and sadly.

Sam shook his head and cut in. "Just a camera flare, Mr. Resnick. Now I know you don't want to hear this, but your friend, Juan robbed a bank and that's it."

"Get out of my house, now!" Ronald yelled at him.

"Yeah, sure, first things first." He told him, and Dean, Annie and I gave him looks as he confiscated the security tapes, and then we went back to the motel.

Annie grabbed one of the beds, since Kate was going to have to head out for a bit, and I sat in a chair in the kitchen/dining area and Dean grabbed a beer out of the fridge and then we all changed a bit and lounged around as Sam set us up to look over the tapes more thoroughly. After kissing Kate for a little bit and then letting her head to the airport, Sam just focused on the tapes and Dean sat down next to me and ran his fingers through my hair. I smiled and reached out to rest my hand on his knee as he took a swig of his beer, watching him with love in my eyes.

"Man, that's gotta be the kicker, straight-up. You told that poor son of a bitch to—what did you say, "'remand the tapes that he copied'? 'Classified evidence to an ongoing investigation'? That's messed up." Dean told Sam as Sam sat down to watch the tape again once he had things in place.

Annie was lying on one of the beds with her eyes closed, thinking about things—she tended to do that a lot. She wasn't the most talkative, but when it came to action, she was all over it better than any of us. I think she really just wanted to be accepted into our group, and I understood that—I understood that she wanted to feel like she belonged and though _I_ thought she did, I understood her need to _prove_ that.

"What are you, pissed at me or something?" Sam asked him.

Dean shook his head. "No, I just think it's a little creepy how good a fed you are. I mean come on, we could have at least thrown the guy a bone—he did some pretty good legwork here."

"Man-Droid?" Sam asked us.

I shrugged and smiled. "Except for the Man-Droid part."

"I liked him. He's not that different from us, Sammy—people think we're crazy." Dean told him with a shrug.

"Yeah, except he's not a hunter, Dean. He's just a guy who stumbled onto something real. If he were to go up against this thing, he'd get torn apart. Better to stay in the dark and stay alive." Sam said, getting a little testy.

Dean sighed and shrugged again. "Yeah, I guess."

"Sammy…chill out," I told him, running my fingers through his hair, "seriously."

Sam leaned back into my hand a little as I tried to calm him down since I was on his side _and_ on Dean's, and I smiled. It was nice for us to be able to just sit around comfortably and still be able to work on a hunt. Shapeshifters…I wasn't familiar with them because I hadn't been with the boys when they had taken the Shapeshifter out, but I knew that Dean took this personally.

"Shapeshifter…just like back in St. Louis." Sam explained, looking at the tape and acting a little more calm, "same retinal reaction to video."

"Eyes flare at the camera. I hate those freaking things." Dean said, starting to map out something.

Sam looked over at him. "You think I don't?"

"Yeah, well one didn't turn into you and frame you for murder." Dean explained, going back to his connection of robberies along the sewer system, and I went over to sit next to him, resting my hand on his leg.

"Well, look, if this shifter's anything like the one we killed in Missouri…" Sam began.

"Then Ronald's right." Annie said.

"Alright, they like to lair up underground—preferably sewers. All the robberies have been connected so far, right? Through the uh—sewer, main layout." Dean asked him.

I nodded and looked at Dean's information. "Yeah…"

"There's one more bank lined up on that same sewer main." Dean said, pointing at it.

xx

I woke up that morning and turned over, frowning a little because Dean wasn't there and waking up without him sucked. I got up and ran my fingers through my hair, kissing Sam's forehead as he slept, and heading out into the main area, kissing Annie's head too and then looking up at Dean. He was sipping his coffee and looking over the research some more, and I sat down next to him, putting my hands in my lap and eyeing him.

"Someone…wasn't in bed when I woke up." I told him slowly, tugging on his button-up and pouting a little. "Where's _my _coffee?"

Dean looked at me and smirked. "Eh, I figured you didn't need any."

"You are an evil, _evil_ man." I said, raising my eyebrows. "If I wasn't madly in love with you, I'd—thank you."

"I'm pretty sure denying you caffeine would be the last thing I'd ever do." Dean told me, watching as I took the Starbucks cup from him. "White Chocolate Mocha, extra shot, just like you like—they were out of Pumpkin Spice."

I sipped my coffee and then set the cup down and looked at him. "Wow…you really _do_ know me."

"God help me, but I do," Dean replied, reaching out to stroke my hair. "I've become some romantic or something and it's kind of your fault."

I grinned and then leaned in, running my nose along his, welcoming the kiss he pressed to my mouth. I pulled him close to me, slipping my fingers into his hair and opening up my mouth for his tongue. We ran our tongues along each other's for a moment and then Dean chuckled, which made me pull away a little, still running my fingertips along his scalp.

"What?" I asked him, smiling a little.

Dean shook his head a little. "For a girly coffee drink, those White Chocolate Mochas aren't too shabby.

I laughed and then nodded, kissing him again and making my way onto his lap, only to pull away again when Annie cleared her throat. We knew it was time to get down to business—and not the kind of business Dean and I were thinking about right then. Still, we knew when we had to buckle down, so I kissed him swiftly and then got off of his lap and turned to Annie as I grabbed my coffee.

"You sleep well, Annie?" I asked her.

Annie yawned, stretched, and then nodded. "I slept beautifully. Is Sam up yet? When do we leave?"

"We have to get dressed first, but we can go anytime we want, really." Dean explained, letting go of my hand.

"We might as well just go now," I said as I sipped my coffee and shrugged.

Annie nodded and so the three of us went to go and wake Sam up, then we all got dressed as camera maintenance people. Our plan was to go over to the City Bank of Milwaukee and check out the cameras, hoping to find the man or woman who was really the Shapeshifter. Then and _only_ then, would we make our move and go after the Shapeshifter before anyone else died, but it seemed kind of like over kill to me.

"Isn't four of us too much?" I asked Dean as I fixed my collar. "I mean you and Sam have it under control and maybe Annie and I could go like pretend to take out a loan or something."

Sam laughed and shrugged. "Or we could split up—you and me and then Annie and Dean. Annie and Dean could check the tapes, and you and I can just wait around for their signal."

"I second that motion," Annie said, and shrugged. "It could be more fun this way."

"Fine, whatever—let's just go." Dean replied with a shrug.

xx

**Annie's POV**

"Well, we haven't had any flags go up on our system yet." The security guard told us.

Dean shook his head. "No, no, no this is a glitch on the overall grid. Just want to make sure the branch monitors are kosher."

"Better to be safe than sorry, I guess." The guard answered.

"That's the plan." I said and smiled at him with a knob.

"Alrighty, here we are. You guys need anything else?" The man asked with a smile.

I shook my head. "No, no, we'll be in and out before you know it—just a routine check."

For some reason I was _really_ excited to be hanging out with Dean on a hunt, even _if_ I knew he wasn't as happy about it. I'd come to notice that Dean and Sam were more willing to trust me since Lana trusted me with her life, but at the same time, Dean was wary of Lana and Sam spending too much time together. It wasn't that he didn't trust them…it was just that they apparently had a past…a past I wish I knew more about so I could help Dean through things if he needed.

"Okie dokie," The guard told us, and then left Dean and me alone.

Dean smiled after he left. "I like him. He says, 'Okie dokie'."

"What if he's the shifter?" I asked him with a smile.

"Well, then we follow him home and put a silver bullet through his chest plate." Dean replied as we took seats to watch the monitors. "So…got popcorn?"

I smiled and then laughed and was glad that he smiled back at me—the 'in' with Dean Winchester was to appeal to his ego. We both looked at all of the cameras and I pointed out Sam and Lana walking in and though Dean acted like he was cool about it, he hated that Sam and Lana were holding hands. I actually wondered what was going on too…why had Sam offered for Lana to be with _him_ this time around…did he _like_ her? No, he was with Kate—this was just hunt business.

"Well, it looks like Mr. Okiedokie's…okie dokie." Dean said, looking at a different monitor.

I took a breath. "Maybe we jumped the gun on this, Dean. We don't even know it's here."

"Mm-hmm," Dean replied, and he sounded involved as I was speaking.

"Maybe we should just go back to the sewers and…and…" I trailed off as I looked at Dean zooming the camera in on Lana's behind as she bent over after being seated by one of the loan managers and I rolled my eyes. "Dean, as cute as I think it is that you're attracted to Lana _that _much we're supposed to be looking for eyes not asses."

Dean smirked. "I'm getting there."

"Oh yeah?" I asked him, raising my eyebrows.

"Yeah," Dean replied and then he pointed at a monitor. "Wait a minute. Hello freak."

I smiled at the monitor. "Got him…"

I got up to go and go to the door to try and give Sam and Lana the signal, but Dean reached out and grabbed my hand. I was confused, but turned to look at him and after brief eye contact, he pointed to the screen and I sighed loudly—Ronald was outside the bank and he had a gun.

"Hello, Ronald," Dean said aloud and sighed.

"Well things just got more complicated," I told him and sighed too, Dean dropping my hand.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I took a deep breath when Sam and I walked into the bank hand in hand and gave his hand a reassuring squeeze as we headed for one of the loan managers. Sam introduced us as Mr. and Mrs. Burke, and we were looking to get a loan for a house since we were newlyweds. I honestly didn't mind playing this part, and I knew I should feel bad about that, but I didn't—we were doing a job and it wasn't like Sam and I didn't care about each other—we did—so acting loving wasn't a stretch at all.

"Well I'm going to have to run some checks and then we'll have a better understanding of what's going on here." The manager explained, taking mine and Sam's fake IDs.

I nodded at him, standing up after dropping my purse, bending over to pick it up. "I'm _so_ clumsy, I'm sorry."

"Baby, people are looking," Sam told me softly, giving my behind a quick slap and smiling at me as I giggled.

"Hands, Baby, hands," I said and then sat down and flipped my hair. "I'm sorry he just can't keep his hands off of me."

The manager swallowed and then he told us he'd be right back, taking a deep breath and heading away from us. I turned to Sam and smiled at him, Sam smiling back and then picking an eyelash off of my face and holding it up to me on his finger. I pondered what I wanted and then made my wish, blowing the eyelash off and turning around when we heard Ronald come in and order everyone to get on the floor.

"Fabulous," I muttered and then Sam and I found Annie and Dean rushing in, near us.

Dean took a deep breath after glancing over at me and looked at Sam. "And you said we shouldn't bring guns."

"I didn't know this was gonna happen Dean." Sam protested. "I had no idea that Ronald was going to come barging in here and try to be a big hero, so how about we cut the sarcasm and actually _do_ something, shall we? We can't let him get hurt—did you find anything?"

"Yeah, the shapeshifter is here, and uh, why don't you let _me_ do all the talking. I don't think he likes you very much, Agent Johnson. Oh, and don't swat her ass again." Dean said, which made me smile a little as he looked at Ronald. "Hey Buddy. Why don't you just calm down. Calm down."

Ronald did a double-take at seeing Dean again and then pointed the gun at us. "What? You! Get on the floor! Now!"

"Okay, we're doing that. Just don't shoot anybody—especially us." Dean told him as we all got down on the floor.

"I knew it the moment you guys left. Who are you? Who are you working for, huh? The Men in Black?" Ronald asked and then something seemed to click for him. "You working for the Man-Droid?"

Sam sighed loudly. "We're not working for the Man-Droid!"

"You shut-up! I ain't talkin' to you! I don't like you!" Ronald cried angrily.

We all gave him looks and for once Sam _actually_ looked a little scared—and to top it off he looked scared of _Ronald_. I mean the guy was intimidating now, but he certainly hadn't been before. Now we had to find a way to get through this with no casualties…yeah because that was _exactly_ how things worked out for us when we were hunting.

"Fair enough," Sam said softly.

"You…get over there. Frisk them down. Make sure they ain't got no weapons." Ronald told a man on the floor. "Go!"

The man obeyed, and we were all clean—except Dean—Dean had a knife on him. It was like Dean to carry one wherever he went, but at the same time, I was kind of annoyed that he had brought a knife when we had all agreed on _no_ weapons. He felt naked without it, I understood that, but now we were in an even bigger mess than I had thought we were in before.

"And what do we have here?" Ronald asked as Annie, Sam and I gave Dean a look.

Dean looked at us. "I'm not just gonna walk in here naked."

"Give that here," Ronald said, and got rid of Dean's knife.

"No, no, no!" Dean called out to him. "We know you don't want to hurt anybody. But that's exactly what's gonna happen if you keep waving that canon around. Now why don't you let these people go?"

"No!" Ronald cried. "I already told you. If no one's gonna stop this thing, then I'm going to do it myself!"

I really did feel like Ronald was being noble here, but at the same time I had the worst feeling that this was going to get him killed and I hated to think about it like that. He was a good man, and he just wanted to be heard, and he had _every_ right to want that. Now, we just had to appeal to him, and I was pretty certain that I knew _exactly_ how to do that.

I looked up at him. "We believe you!"

"That's why we're here," Annie added, nodding at what I had blurted out.

"You don't believe me!" Ronald yelled at us. "No one believes me! Why should they?"

"Come here," Dean said after a long pause.

Ronald was surprised at the soft command. "What? No."

"You're the one holding the gun, Boss. You're the one calling the shots." Dean explained. "I just want to tell you something. Come here."

Ronald seemed to think that was a logical enough explanation, and so he slowly came towards us and looked at Dean to continue. Dean nodded slowly and I glanced around at everyone on the floor, wondering what Dean was going to say next _and_ trying to figure out a way to get us all out of here _without_ having to resort to magic.

"It's the bank manager," Dean whispered to him.

Ronald looked at him. "What?"

"Why do you think we got these get-ups, huh? We've been monitoring the cameras in the back. We saw the bank manager. We saw his eyes." Dean explained slowly.

"His laser eyes?" Ronald asked hopefully.

"Yes. No. No!" Dean replied, waving his arms. "Look, we're running out of time, all right! We gotta find him before he changes into someone else!"

I was glad that Dean was being truthful with him—it seemed like we _all_ should have done that to begin with—but at the same time I worried. At first it looked like Ronald believed everything he was saying, but at the same time, he knew that he couldn't' trust us. Could you even blame the guy? We had barged into his home, taken the security tapes he had gotten a hold of, and dashed every dream that he had had about Man-Droids. He had finally thought he was onto something and we had ruined it for him effortlessly…so why should he trust us at all?

"Like I'm gonna listen to you. You're a damn liar." Ronald told Dean, who started to get up with his hands in the air even with a look of protest from me. "I'll shoot you! Get down!"

"Take me. Okay? Take me with you. Take me as a hostage. But we gotta act fast, because the longer we just sit here, the more time he has to change." Dean explained, getting to his feet. "Look at me, Man. I believe you. You're not crazy. There really is something inside this bank."

"All right," Ronald said softly. "Y-You come with me. But everyone else gets in the vault! Come on! Move! Move, move! You lock up."

Everyone filed into the vault and I took a deep breath and stayed near the entrance of it as Ronald pointed the gun at Dean. He wanted Dean to stay with him and explain some more, and yet he wanted us all locked up too so that if one of us was this Shapeshifter/Man-Droid, we wouldn't be able to do any harm at all.

"Dean…" I said stepping up to the door of it.

Dean looked at Ronald as Ronald began to protest. "Just hold off a moment, please?"

"Fine…make it quick!" Ronald told him.

"Be careful. If you get yourself killed chasing this thing, I swear—" I told him, but smiled and returned the kiss he silenced me with.

I didn't care that everyone in the back could see us, and it made me feel even better when he pulled me closer and nipped at my bottom lip. He loved me, and he wanted me to know that he was going to be fine, but I was still upset and I didn't want to be separated from him. I just wanted Dean to be all right, and him kissing me to shut me up _wasn't_ telling me that he was going to be all right.

"Lanni—you worry too much. I'm going to be fine." Dean replied softly, and then kissed me one more time before he looked up at the rest of the people in the vault. "It's okay everyone, stay cool."

A pretty blonde woman watched Dean close the vault door. "Who is that man?"

"He's my brother." Sam explained to her.

"He is so brave…" She said with a dreamy smile on her face.

Sam rolled his eyes and I wished that I could muster up enough niceness to explain to her sweetly that he was mine but it wasn't worth it. I knew he was, and I needed to focus on getting us all out of the vault and at the same time getting us all out safely. Annie went around to make sure everyone was all right and I looked at Sam after glancing at the blonde…marking my territory was simply going to have to wait.

xx

**Dean's POV**

After shutting the vault, I looked over at Ronald and he motioned with the gun and I sighed—I really _did_ like the guy but now he was getting in my way. I needed silver and I needed it fast, and I need to figure out where the Shapeshifter had headed off to. If Ronald hadn't come running in, his gun blazing, this probably would have been a _much_ easier hunt.

"So…that girl…" Ronald told me, trailing off as I led him back out to the front desk, looking for silver.

I smiled and I knew he could see it. "Lanni?"

"You work with her?" Ronald asked me.

"Sam's my younger brother—the one you don't like. Annie is Lanni's younger sister, and Lanni…well she's mine." I told him reverently, wishing I hadn't said it like that even though I knew after this I'd never see Ronald again. "Lanni and Sam thought you would get hurt trying to hunt this thing down so Sam tried to make you believe you were crazy. I'm sorry about that, I am, but they had your best interests at heart, Ronald."

Ronald scoffed as I examined a letter opener. "He could have gone about it differently."

"He should have let Lanni sugar-coat it is what he should have done." I explained to Ronald with a small laugh and shake of my head. "If there's one thing that Lanni's amazing at, it's getting someone to do something and think it was _their_ idea in the first place. I mean Hell, I didn't even realize that was how things were until I was already in love with her and unable to change it…and I don't want to."

I looked at Ronald, the letter opener real silver, and then we went to the bank manager's office as he took in the information that I was feeding him. I hadn't even explained all of this to Lana yet, and still it felt good to get it all off of my chest. Being in love with Lana Meckenzie was both infuriating and intoxicating and I wasn't sure whether or not it was a good thing. I loved her, and I would do anything for her, but there was always a voice in the back of my head telling me that I was going to get her killed…that I was just hurting the one thing in this world that I cared the _most_ about…besides Sammy.

"You're going to let her go, right?" I asked Ronald.

He looked at me. "Once this is over everyone can go—I don't want to hurt anyone, I just want to find this thing."

"I just want her safe, Ron." I told him, breaking off eye contact with him when he nodded slowly to reassure me that no harm would come to her. "Son of a bitch…"

I looked over at the patch of skin on the ground and explained to Ronald that this was bad—that the Shapshifter had shed its skin and it could be anyone. We needed to go back to the vault and we needed to figure out who the Shapeshifter was now…we needed to make sure that there weren't any stragglers still left in the bank.

"Oh my God," Ronald said as we were headed back, "I'm not crazy. I thought that I was losing my mind but I was _right_—except for the whole Man-Droid part…thank you."

I nodded at him. "Well don't mention it."

He smiled and we started walking again until the lights all went off and I had to do a double take—oh this was _not_ good. The lights going out meant that the cops were here, and that meant that I was in deep shit. I was wanted, and the cops were surrounding the bank…how in the Hell were we going to get _out_ of here once this was over.

"Oh no…no, no, no, no, no…" I said, glancing around at the darkness.

Ronald looked around with the gun waved. "What? What is it?"

"They cut the power—it's probably their way of saying 'hi'." I explained, walking on.

"Who's way?" Ronald asked me.

I looked at him. "The cops."

"The cops?" Ronald asked, stopping in his tracks.

I turned to him and realized that I was going to have to explain _this_ to him as well and even though I wasn't jazzed about it, I needed him on his toes. This had all just gotten a _lot_ more serious, and if he was flipping out, he was a liability and I couldn't have that.

"Well you weren't exactly a smooth criminal about this, Ron! I mean you didn't even secure the security guard—he probably called them." I explained to him.

Ron looked flustered. "I mean, I didn't think—"

"—calm down, calm down, let's take a breath and think about this a minute here." I told him calmly. "All right, they probably got us surrounded, they cut the power to the cameras so there's no way to tell who the Shapeshifter is…it's not looking good, Ron."

I turned to keep walking and Ron followed me, freaking out and with his gun in hand. Then we heard a noise and Ron was suddenly alert, making me start to think things over a little more. Whatever we needed to do we needed to do it fast, and for that I needed Sam, Lana and Annie—they were the only ones who were going to help me finish this like it needed to be finished.

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Has your brother always been so, um…wonderful?" The blonde woman asked Sam.

Annie looked from her to me. "Wow…women want your man."

"Yeah, sadly I know this," I told her, rubbing my temples and glancing at the vault door.

"I mean staring down that gun…and the way he played right into that psycho crazy's head by telling him exactly what he wanted to hear? I mean he's like…a real hero or something." The blonde chuckled.

"Yeah…yeah…" Sam said, and he looked very much like he wanted her away from him and I couldn't blame him—she was annoying me and it was getting excruciatingly hot in the vault with all of us in there.

I turned when Dean opened up the vault door though, and I smiled at him, losing my smile when the blonde started flipping out, not noticing the gun in his hand now—Ronald had obviously decided to trust him. It was nice that Dean had a fan and his ego was being boosted, but did she have to be so Goddamn annoying while she was jumping for joy and screaming about how wonderful he was?

"Oh my God—he saved us! He saved us!" The blonde cried hysterically happy.

"Actually, I found a few more. Come on, guys." Dean said, letting a huge group of more people into the vault, the blonde looking like all her hopes had been dashed.

She gaped at him. "What are you doing?"

"Look, guys, Ronald and I need to talk to you." Dean said, looking at Sam, Annie and I, and we nodded, leaving the vault, leaving the hostages behind.

I looked at Ronald and then looked at Dean as Ronald went to go and hold down the fort, looking at Annie and then taking a breath. Dean stepped in close to me, but not romantically, and looked me over with his eyes to make sure I was fine and it warmed my heart. He wasn't going to say anything about it because it wasn't the time, but at the same time it was nice to know that he wanted me safe and alive.

"What's going on?" I asked him, getting down to business.

Dean took a deep breath. "It shed its skin again. We don't know where it went. It could be in the halls. It could be in the vault. To top it all off, the cops are here and they've cut off the power so they have to be surrounding us."

"Great. You know Dean you _are_ wanted by the police." Sam told him.

Dean rubbed his chin. "Yeah…"

"The shapeshifter thing where a Shapeshifter impersonated him?" Annie asked in a whisper, and I nodded.

"So even if we do find this damn thing, how the Hell are we going to get out of here?" Sam asked Dean, and we all wanted to know the answer to that.

"Yeah, one problem at a time," Dean explained to him. "Lanni and I are going to do a sweep of the whole place—see if we can find any stragglers. As much as I like that you care about her and you protect her, I don't need you slapping her ass anymore. Then when we get everyone together, we're going to play a little game called 'find the freak' so…here. I found another one of these things for you." Dean explained and then pointed at Annie. "Now you and Annie stay here. Make sure Ron doesn't hurt anybody…help him manage."

"Help him manage? Are you insane?" Sam asked loudly and Annie sent me a look.

Ronald looked over at Dean who smiled and looked at him and gave a reassuring hand gesture. The two of them had obviously bonded, and though Sam and Annie looked annoyed to be paired up together, they had to because Dean had told them to. Besides, Ron needed the help because he had _no_ idea what he was going and the four of us completely knew that.

"I have to stay with PMS Man?" Annie asked aloud.

I laughed a little. "Ronald likes us, don't worry about it. If all else fails, you can keep Sammy in line."

"Look, I know this isn't going the way we wanted it." Dean explained to them.

"Understatement!" Sam cried out.

"Yeah, all right, but if we let the cops in right now, Ronald gets arrested. We get arrested, and the shifter gets away, and we'll probably never find it again, okay?" Dean said and then Sam motioned to Ronald. "Ron! Get out of the light!"

Ron moved and Annie and I smiled a bit at him because as clueless as he was, he was adorable and that much couldn't be argued with. He was trying so hard to fit in with us and to do what we needed him to do, and he was following Dean's orders with absolutely no question. Having him kept in line was making the hunt seem that much less daunting, and that was definitely a good thing for me.

"I like him." Annie told me.

I nodded at her. "Me too."

"Seriously?" Sam asked as Dean chuckled.

"Ron had a bit of a bad plan—it was a bit of a crazy plan—but crazy is the game in town, okay?" Dean asked Sam.

"We can do it, Sammy. Don't freak." Annie said, and I smiled at her. "Take care of her, okay, Hot Shot? I know you love her and all that jazz, but seriously—I want her to come through this."

Dean nodded at her. "I promise, Annie."

I rolled my eyes and told her and Sam to be careful before I went off with Dean and he smiled at me as he turned on his flashlight. Then he chuckled and I looked at him, sweeping my flashlight over the walls and heading down the hall with him, going towards the offices.

"What's so funny?" I asked him.

Dean shook his head. "I just find it funny that in a crisis Annie still has time to threaten me just in case I get you killed or something."

"She told me you checked my ass out in the security cameras." I told him with a laugh.

"That was _much_ more fun before Sam reached over and hit it." Dean admitted and then he pointed up to the ceiling of the room we'd entered. "This part seem to sag more than the rest of it?"

I looked up. "Yeah, actually..."

"Hmmm…" Dean said with a nod.

I reached over and grabbed a coat rack, handing it to him and he lifted it, pushing on the ceiling and then it broke. It had been sagging because a dean man had happened to be shoved up there, and he fell onto the ground—the body of a man that was very much alive in the vault. That meant we had to go back to the vault and get the shifter to come out with us so that we could take care of it once and for all.

"Well…we found him." I told him with a sigh. "You know, I wish it had been a sack of gross, shed skin instead of a cold, dead body with blood all over."

Dean nodded at him in agreement. "Yeah…better go tell Sammy."

I sighed and nodded at that because Sam and Annie needed to know what was going on and who the Shapeshifter was. So the two of us went to go and tell Sam, but before we got there, I took Dean's hand and he stopped in his tracks. I knew he had a feeling things were about to get mushy and I knew it wasn't the time, but I couldn't help it.

"Hey…Dean?" I asked him slowly and softly.

He turned to me. "Yeah?"

"I know it's not the time…but I love you." I assured him, looking into his eyes.

He smiled at me and kissed me, pouring more into me through just one kiss than he had in a little while. I couldn't stop myself from wrapping my arms around his neck, kissing him lovingly and then I pulled back and I kissed him swiftly. We needed to do this hunt—that was our _main_ priority and he knew it too.

"It's always the time for that." He told me softly.

I smiled a little more and he turned to go find Sam, me following behind him and motioning for Annie and Sam when we got to them. Dean explained about the man in the vault and Sam took a deep breath, nodding, Annie heading to the vault first. She was _very_ pro-active, and yet she let Dean open _up_ the vault, and we looked at the man.

"Hey, can I talk to you for a second?" Dean asked him.

"You've got the gun man, whatever," He said, and knocked Dean down, Annie going for him, but he knocked her down as well, one of the hostages from before that was having heart troubles, looking rather pained.

"Hey stop him!" Ronald yelled, following him with the gun, and stepping into the light.

One of the lasers from a sniper shone through and hit Ronald's back, and Annie and I ran towards him, but stopped in the dark as Dean hid. He had moved because it had been an instinct to go after the man, but it had been a bad move and we weren't going to get to him in time no matter how hard we tried.

"Get down, Ron!" Annie cried, but the bullet had already hit him, and he fell down to the ground.

We saddled up next to Dean as Sam joined us, and Sam sighed and we looked at Ronald with sadness. He had been doing _so_ much for us and now he had gotten shot and we still needed to keep the hostages. We were going to have to have Ronald's death on our conscious, and on top of that we were going to have to take over the situation…we were going to have to become the bank robbers practically…oh that was just _awesome_.

"Here, you take care of the guard—I'm going after the shifter." Sam said, handing Dean the silver and taking off.

"I want to help him." Annie replied, and went off after him before I could say anything.

"Annie!" I whispered, but she was off. "Damn that girl."

Dean looked down at Ronald. "Sorry, Ron. You did a real good job tracking this thing, you really did."

He reached down and took Ronald's gun because we were going to need it, and then took a deep breath. We both felt bad about what had just happened, but I _also_ knew the look that was in his eyes and I didn't like it one bit. He was going to run off and do something reckless and I wasn't sure how to stop him from doing that…I couldn't.

"Dean, where the Hell are you going?" I asked, but he didn't hear me, and took the guard over to the bank's front doors to let him out.

I was glad that the man was getting the attention that he needed, but at the same time he should have let _me_ do it. By the time I got to his side, he was already shutting the door and locking it up, looking flustered. I glanced out to see that there were flashes outside and immediately I got it—cops and _news crews_.

"They saw you, didn't they?" I asked him slowly.

He took a deep breath and secured the chains. "We are so screwed."

"Your phone," I told him as we went down the stairs.

"Yeah?" He answered, and I knew it was Sam. "What? Oh God, it's like playing the shell game. It could be anybody again."

I groaned at that. "It shed its skin _again_?"

"You search every inch of this place, and Lanni and I will round everybody up." Dean explained to him and then hung up the phone and looked at me. "We are so screwed, Lanni…seriously."

I reached out and took his arms, rubbing them. "We're going to figure out a way out of this because we always do, Dean…is Annie all right?"

"She's with Sam—she's fine. He won't let anything happen to her." Dean assured me, and we went to the vault, shutting people in.

We wanted to let them go—we really did—but the Shapeshifter was still out there and we knew that this was where they were safe. If they stayed locked up we could narrow the clues down to figure out which one was the monster, and then we could take him out. That was all that mattered right now…we had to finish up this hunt and make sure that _no one else_ got killed off in the process.

"And I thought you were one of the good guys," the blonde told Dean.

Dean sighed and looked at her. "What's your name?"

"Why would you care?" She asked hostilely.

"My name's Dean," Dean told her, trying to somewhat bond with her.

"Shari," she replied after a pause.

Dean nodded at her and smiled softly. "Hi, Shari—everything's going to be all right. It's all going to be over soon, okay?"

She just nodded slowly, his voice very assuring, and then he shut the vault door and looked at me. We were kind of tired of this hunt but we had more work to do, and it didn't help that both the bank phone _and_ my cell phone went off at the same time. So Dean went to answer the bank phone, and I went to answer my cell phone, slipping around the corner so that neither of the calls conflicted with the other.

"Annie—are you all right?" I asked her. "How's Sammy."

Annie laughed a little. "We're both just fine, Lan, I just…I have a bad feeling about this."

"Welcome to my world," I said dismally and closed my eyes, rubbing my temples. "So no idea who the Shapeshifter is yet?"

"No, but I'm willing to bet you they're in the vault." Annie explained to me. "Sam and I are wrapping up our search here I just wanted to check in."

I smiled at her. "I'm thankful for that. Now I need to get back to Dean because he got a call from the cops I'm pretty sure."

"All right…be careful, Lan." Annie told me.

"I love you, Annie." I said, wanting her to know that just in case.

Annie laughed again. "I love you too, Sis. Way to be optimistic, by the way—we're going to be fine, and we're going to get out of this fine. Now go talk to Dean and Sam and I will see you both momentarily."

With that she hung up on me and I laughed a little—the girl had spunk, and she vaguely reminded me of Dean. She wasn't really into her emotions, she didn't believe in trying to set things straight just in case someone died, and she was focused on the hunt. I didn't want her to get hurt but I _did_ return to Dean, who looked like he was freaking out.

"Baby, are you okay?" I asked him.

Dean sighed and shook his head. "This Fed, he's a smart-ass like me, only stupid."

"A Fed? Damn-it," I told him with a sigh.

"And he _knows_, Lanni. He knows the three of us are in here—he doesn't know about Annie though, and he won't I promise you that." Dean assured me and then he reached out and took my hand. "I'm sorry about all of this."

I shrugged and kissed him. "Trust me, this isn't your fault."

I kissed him again because he was still freaking out about the Fed, and he ran his thumb over my cheek, pulling back. He looked me in the eye and stroked my hair, and I cocked my head to one side wondering what was up with him. I wasn't quite sure what the look was, but at the same time I wanted to know more than I wanted to finish this hunt.

"Just in case something goes wrong, I want you to promise me that you'll get out of here." Dean told me, pulling me closer to him and keeping his hand cupping my face. "No staying behind to go down with me crap, all right? You get out of here if anything goes wrong."

I opened my mouth to protest and to ask him where this was coming from, but we heard Sam and Annie and turned to them after a pause of looking into each other's eyes. He had been asking me to make such a serious promise, and I wasn't sure that I could have actually promised him that. Good thing the younger siblings showed up.

"Hey," Sam said with a sigh.

"Hey," Dean told him, pulling away from me and going over to him. "We've got a bit of a problem outside."

Sam chuckled. "We've got a problem in here."

"What do you mean?" I asked him.

"It's best we just _show_ you." Annie replied with a sigh.

Dean and I raised our eyebrows, and then we followed Sam and Annie to another dead body and I nodded slowly. Yeah, the Shapeshifter was _definitely_ in the vault, which meant that we were going to have to go there once again to get the Shapeshifter to come with us. Someone needed to stay with the body though, just in case so we could get this taken care of once and for all.

"The blonde that was in infatuated with Dean, here," Annie explained with a nod.

I nodded slowly too. "Shari…"

"Figures—first a Shapeshifter turns into me, and now one wants to get with me." Dean said dismally.

"Well at least we know who it is, now and she's less of a threat on Lana's territory." Annie told him with a shrug as Dean laughed.

"It's not her," I told them, kneeling down by the body. "I mean it's her, but…go get Shari."

Dean nodded and went to go get Shari, bringing her back with him, showing her the dead body of herself. When he showed it to her, she started to freak out and she was screaming, which just confirmed my suspicions—the shifter was the dead body. I could sense most demonic type things and shape shifters happened to be one of them.

"What is this, Community Theater or are you naturally this good?" Dean asked her harshly.

"This is the last time you become anything…ever." Sam said as he held onto her and made a fist, but she fainted.

"Guys! She isn't the Shifter!" I said, sighing loudly and pointing to the body. "It was faking. It wanted us to kill Shari so that we thought we got it and then it would escape when our backs were turned."

At that, the body got up and I tucked my hair behind my ears as Dean went to go at it, the Shifter not wanting to die. Well, what did? So it began to attack Dean, as he was closest, trying to strangle Dean, and the real Shari got up and starting screaming again. She was really getting on my nerves, and I understood that this was hard for her to comprehend…but did she _have_ to scream so Goddamn much?

"Calm down, Shari," I told her.

"Seriously, stop trying to kill our sense of hearing!" Annie yelled at her.

Dean tried to stab the shifter and failed, looking up at us. "Get her out of here, now!"

"We're on it!" I assured him, and then pointed to Sam. "Go with Sam and help him out—_now_, Annie."

"Lanni!" Dean told me angrily as Sam went off with Sam to get the real Shari to safety.

I shook my head. "Sorry, Dean…I am helping you fight."

The girl knocked him off though, and ran at me, thrusting up with her hand and hitting me in the jaw as I went to restrain her. I wanted her out of the room, and I wasn't really happy she'd hit Dean in his beautiful face. I went to wipe the blood off of my bottom lip since I had bit it when her hand made contact with my face, and she headed out into the hall, me right behind her and Dean behind me.

I went into a room I could sense her in, Dean opening his mouth to tell that he wanted me to let _him_ handle it and then she showed. I turned around right as I heard her go for Dean, and she kneed him in the groin and I cringed, sensing some more as Dean pulled on her arm and the skin came off. The Feds were here…they were here and Dean was right—we were all _so _screwed.

"Gross," Dean said making a face.

I punched the Shapeshifter after she went to kick Dean in the groin again, and then I grabbed her by the throat and Dean lunged at her, pushing the silver into her. Then just when we thought it was all over, one of the swat guys came in, flashing the flashlight in our faces and Dean and I swallowed. Even if we were getting arrested, Dean was going to talk to me about how I should have listened to him and gotten out when I could.

"Damn," I muttered.

"Don't worry, it's me." Sam told us.

Annie nodded and came out from behind him. "Yeah, it's just us."

"Thank you for giving us a heart attack," I told them, smacking them in the arms.

"We have to hurry. I have a uniform for you, Dean." Sam said and handed it out.

I nodded quickly. "Right…I can use a spell to make Annie and me invisible."

After nodding and the boys getting dressed to sneak out, we hurried out of the building and to the parking garage. We hurried to the Impala and once we got in, the boys took the masks off and I undid the spell, all of us taking deep breaths. This was major, and I was worried about what was going to happen next…and what that Fed was going to do next time we ran into him.

"We are so screwed." Dean said aloud.

**Note: Next chapter is kind of a 'filler', but it's important like all of the other 'filler' chapters, lol. =D Feedback is always appreciated!**


	15. Conflicts of Faith

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This chapter is pretty long but not _too _long. It starts out in Sam's POV, moves to Dean's, and then ends up in Lana's.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Sam's POV**

Since Dean had been seen, the next case was up to Lana, Annie and I. Annie was getting really into the whole researching thing, which made me smile quite a lot—she actually thought that it was kind of fun to look up all the different kinds of demons. Plus, she had no idea that in all of this, she was actually becoming part of our little dysfunctional family and Dean and I were starting to _actually _trust her.

"So who wants to go and talk to Gloria?" Annie asked us.

Lana sighed loudly. "Well Dean has to stay here because he was seen by the cops and the Feds know he's around somewhere."

"Trying to get a man out who might have been having a heart attack." Dean protested and shot us looks.

"Yeah, but you're wanted. That's why you have to stay." I explained as I shrugged.

Dean sighed loudly. "Fine—you three just go on ahead and leave me here by myself."

"If that's how you want it!" Annie exclaimed excited to be getting to go and talk to someone people thought was crazy.

I laughed a little at how excited Annie was, and then looked at Lana to see what she had to say since I cared about that. Lana was already one of us and what she said was pretty much what happened—she had the pants in our relationship and she knew it. In fact sometimes her knowing that got us all in trouble, but we couldn't love her any less no matter _what_ happened, even if we tried.

Lana smiled at Annie. "Sammy, you drive, and take Annie with you. I'm going to stay behind and entertain the Delinquent."

"You know I can take care of myself right?" Dean asked her, giving her a look. "I mean I can hang out here by myself and _not _burn the place to the ground, I promise."

"I was talking about getting in some 'us' time." Lana told him, glancing at him.

"Oh!" Dean replied and then wiggled his eyebrows. "Yeah…Annie? Sammy? You can go now. Hurry up and get to researching!"

I rolled my eyes and laughed, Annie laughing too and heading out the front door as I grabbed my jacket. She and I could handle the questioning all on our own, and the look on Lana's face meant business so I knew Dean was in good hands…literally. The two of them had playful down to an art, and I wanted to let them have their fun because I was becoming more and more convinced that the two of them were meant for each other…that they were going to last out together forever.

"All right, we're going—be good." I told them, even though I knew it was useless.

Dean gave me a look. "When am I not?"

"Don't make me answer that." I said as I gave him a look too, and then I was out the door and into the Impala with Annie.

It always felt a little weird with Annie, but it was only because of her age—Annie was 18 and she could still have a life if she wanted it—believe me, she wanted it. This was getting a bit wary for her even though she was enjoying being near Lana and I had a feeling that sooner or later she was going to opt to quit and go back to Wisconsin with the Newmans. In fact just thinking about the Newmans made me think about Kate…and I missed her.

Kate and I hadn't even known each other all that long, but I felt comfortable with her and it was nice to be flirted with. She also vouched for Annie, so even though she was young, she was welcome as long as she wanted to be here and right now, she and I went to the mental institution after dressing up as specialists, and then went into Gloria's room. We were supposed to talk to her and get as much details as possible about the murder she had committed and confessed to, and I was smelling something fishy around here. Still, that was the whole point of our job…

"Good morning. You're not the usual guy." Gloria said, looking up at me and smiling softly.

"No. No. I'm just filling in." I told her, shaking my head and then motioning to Annie. "I brought a student of mine with me too, I hope you don't mind."

She smiled at Annie. "Of course not."

"So how are you feeling today, Gloria?" I asked her softly.

"I've never felt better." Gloria answered.

I nodded and noted that on my notepad. "So, no disturbances lately?"

"You mean am I stark raving cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs?" She asked me.

I looked up at her and I took a breath, smiling at her and trying to let her know that I was on her side—whether I was or not. The whole art of this job was being able to convince people that you were who you were pretending to be, and getting them to confess things to you that they wouldn't normally admit out loud. It was an art that seasoned hunters had down, and as vain as it sounded, I was one of those hunters.

"I didn't say that," I told her with a smile.

She smiled back at me. "It's all right. I know what people must think."

"And what do _you_ think?" Annie asked.

"I think what I saw was real." Gloria answered calmly.

I nodded, and then Annie and I took seats across from her and I looked at her softly, all of us going silent for a moment or two. She just seemed so put together and so unlike a murderer—she wasn't fitting the M.O. at all. All I needed was _her_ side of the story, and then I could put together all of the information and potentially get this all figured out enough to get this done so we could move on quickly and Dean wouldn't have to be in the same place for too long.

"I'd like to know what you saw." Sam told her softly.

Gloria looked down and then up at me. "It was all over the news. I stabbed a man in the heart."

"Why would you do that?" I asked her.

"Because it was God's will." She answered firmly.

There was something about the _way_ that she said it that made me actually believe that she believed that. I wasn't sure if I thought it was _true_ or not, but my own conclusion would come with more information and for that, I needed to ask her more questions.

"Did God talk to you?" I asked her calmly.

Gloria smiled at me. "I get the sense God's a little busy for house calls. No, he—he sent someone."

"Someone?" Annie asked her, and she wasn't being as calm and nice about it as I was.

"An angel. It came to me in this…beautiful white light, and it filled me with this—feeling. It's—it's hard to describe." Gloria explained to us.

I nodded at her. "And this angel…?"

"Spoke God's word." Gloria finished for me.

"And this word was…to kill someone?" I asked her slowly, making sure that I was hearing her correctly about all of this.

"I know it sounds strange, but what I did was very important. I helped him smite an evil man. I was chosen…for redemption." She told me.

I nodded slowly. "The man you stabbed…did the angel give you his name?"

"No. He just told me to wait for the sign, and the very next day I saw it—right beside the man's doorway, and I knew." She told us.

"Why him?" I inquired, trying to piece it all together.

"I just know what the angel told me—that this man was guilty to his deepest foundations—and that was good enough for me." She told us, a smile still on her face.

I nodded at her and then glanced at Annie, who kind of looked bewildered about the whole thing. I wasn't sure where Annie stood on faith, but I knew that it was a big thing for Lana, so this case was going to be interesting to say the least. Gloria just didn't _sound_ or _look_ crazy, but she had thought an angel talked to her and had killed a man because she was told to…I needed to get back and talk to Dean and Lana.

xx

**Dean's POV**

Practically the second that Annie and Sam had left out of the motel room, Lana had pulled her shirt off and sat on my lap. I knew she wasn't into quickies, but at the same time, she wanted us to be able to get some fun in and I was more than happy to oblige her. I think that both of us were aware this time around that something was different…that there was so much more meaning behind the dance this time…and I didn't know what to do about it.

I ran my fingers through Lana's hair and looked at her as I propped my head up on my hand and thought about things. She was gazing at me and chewing on her fingernail, pushing her bangs out of her face and still staying fixed on me with her eyes. There were so many thoughts and emotions running through me and I didn't know what to do about them, but I knew that Lana was the _only_ one who had _ever_ done this to me…_ever_ made me _feel_ this way.

"How much more time do you think we have?" Lana asked me.

I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head. "No idea."

"You are such a goof." Lana told me laughing, and reached for my left hand, bringing it up to her face and looking at my watch. "I would say we have time to go _one_ more time."

"Oh really?" I asked her, and then couldn't help but pout at her when she sat up and started rummaging through her duffle.

She just nodded at me and then I heard some change jingling and I raised my eyebrows until she turned to me, the covers covering her naked flesh for now, and she showed me some quarters. My eyes left her insatiable grin and rested on the vibrating machine attached to the bed and I smiled. She just nodded and laughed a little when I pressed my lips to hers and shook my head a little.

"You're perfect." I told her, kissing her jaw line and biting her neck softly as my mouth continued to move along her soft skin.

She laughed and her throat rumbled against my mouth as her fingers slipped into my hair right after a soft 'clink' could be heard as she put a quarter in. Lana was so different from how she had been when we'd first met, and yet she was exactly the same. We'd all grown since our first encounter, and at the same time, it was almost as if we were standing still…at least that she was. Every time I looked at her, I just saw, 'Lana'…what would I ever do without her and why did she make me think this way?

_Sam and I had been researching the deaths since we had gotten into Kansas, and though I didn't really like being back here, there wasn't much that I could do about it. It was a hunt, Sam had found it, and we were going to see it through because we had been near the area. Besides, at a wake there was food, and food was **definitely** worth going **anywhere** for._

_I turned to Sam to say something when I felt a body collide into mine and I turned to see a brunette woman standing there in a killer black dress. She was very attractive—even though she looked like she had been crying…she must be family of the deceased. The dress was short, but not short enough to make her easy, and her eyes kind of sparkled…_

"_Sorry." She told us, reaching out and ringing the doorbell. "I should really learn to watch where I'm going."_

_I waved it off and smiled at her. "You look like you're in a hurry."_

_She nodded and blushed a little. "I'm late to my own best friend's wake. What side of the family are you on?"_

"_Oh…we're just friends from school." Sam cut in as I tried hard not to raise my eyebrows._

_If she was such good friends of the deceased, then why wouldn't she **know **what side of the family Sam and I were on? I mean yeah we **weren't **related to the deceased in anyway, but it was like a hole in her story…something was fishy here._

"_I don't think I remember Chelsea mentioning you—I don't remember seeing you either." She told us, looking us both over._

_Sam nodded at her slowly. "Right…because you went to the same school too."_

_She smirked and I swallowed. "Yeah, and I don't remember any good-looking men there. It was an all girls' school, guys. Do your research if you want to snoop around."_

_I reached over and smacked Sam in the arm for coming up with the school story in the first place, and he gave me a look as another girl opened the door. This one was blonde and she pulled the brunette to her and they shared a fond embrace as Sam and I composed ourselves. We were supposed to be hospitable, and our first impression had been shabby at best—we needed to step it up so we could do this and get out of here._

"_Who are you guys?" The blonde asked us as she pulled out of the hug._

_The brunette waved the question off. "Friends from school."_

_The blonde nodded and laughed a little, the brunette nodding and smiling which made Sam and I feel rather uncomfortable. There was a little secret between them and I had a feeling that they were onto us. Why did they have to be so smart? So aware? They were also **obviously **friends of the deceased…so my original assumption was definitely wrong._

"_Well how about you take your friends into the study and talk to them there, will you? I need to check on the refreshments table and then I need you to work on your duties." The blonde told the brunette, squeezing her hand and then taking off._

_The brunette turned to us. "Follow me."_

_She shook her head and laughed a little to herself, Sam and I exchanging looks before we followed her into the empty study. I watched as she went over to the door and shut it, locking it, which made me suddenly alert. What if she was the killer? Maybe she was locking us in here to kill us and move on…why the hot ones?_

_She smiled at us. "I'm Lana…all right cuties, what are your names so I can help you with your cover?"_

"_I'm Dean." I told her with a smirk. "And this is my younger brother, Sam."_

"_Well nice to meet you." She told us, smiling a little more. "Just to let you know, I did not go to the all girls' school, and I will pretend I know you, okay? Now why are you really here?" She watched us as Sam and I exchanged looks and then she just nodded before Sam and I could figure out what to say to her. "Something supernatural, eh? I agree. Jen and I have been researching. But what, I still haven't figured that out. God what I would do for a scotch!"_

"_Scotch sounds good." I told her with an impressed smirk. "I take it we've encroached on another hunter's territory then?"_

_Lana smiled and I realized that there was something about that smile right then and there—she was a good hunter. She could probably use that smile for just about anything and get whatever she wanted. If she practiced enough, she could probably even be better than Sam and I at all of this._

"_We're not going to find any scotch here, and no…not encroach." She said, answering the questions one after the other like they were nothing. "Jen and I, as much as we want to do this for revenge, could actually use another pair of eyes and ears. It's our fault Chelsea got ganked, and as weird as it sounds…I think we're dealing with vampires." Lana explained, lowering her voice and taking a couple of steps towards us. "She was drained of all of her blood, and her neck was snapped—I'm thinking a demon of some kind—or some kind of dark ritual, but my research hasn't really reached any conclusion yet."_

_I raised an eyebrow. "No wonder you need our help: someone needs to explain to you that vampires—"_

"—_have to be beheaded? I'm aware of that, thank you. What you're not aware of is that some of the really stupid ones that people write about in books actually exist. Perhaps not by name, but definitely by definition." Lana replied, cutting me off. "Who needs whose help now?"_

_I cleared my throat to give her the impression that she had won, but really I was trying to hide my amusement, and my attraction. She was sure of herself, she was beautiful, and she obviously knew what she was doing. Sam laughed at the two of us went at it verbally, and I just nodded a little and looked her in the eye—she had to pass another test._

"_What makes you think you can trust us with this?" I asked her._

_Lana made eye contact with me and smiled—damn that smile. "You were trying to be undercover, and you're not dressed for the occasion. Not to mention that you needed an alias, so you were obviously looking for something, and this being the fourth death…in any ritual, there would most likely be one more—pentagrams. We both need each other's help and I figure why not team up for the time being, right?"_

_We nodded and then Sam spoke up. "Could you show us your research?"_

"_After the wake, sure, Sam." Lana nodded at him. "As for right now, I need to run on off to do my best friend duties, but since Jen is coming over later to help me some more, I suppose our new eyes and ears should join."_

"_All right…after the wake then." Sam told her with a smile and for a second I was jealous—she seemed to like his smile a little **too **much._

I had definitely not been lying to Annie when I had said that she had been wearing a killer little black number—she had been. Everything about her was beautiful, and commanding, and she was always so sure of herself. At the same time, she wasn't the kind of hunter that Sam and I were…she had more of a conscience than _either_ of us could even _dream_ of having.

She'd pushed herself all the way in and I'd let my walls come down one by one and now I couldn't imagine not having her here. I was going to do something wrong, wasn't I? What if I pushed her away? I had a habit of screwing things up with the people I cared about and I was new to this. I wasn't used to having a woman this close to me…I wasn't used to feeling like I had to keep a woman safe…that I had to keep a woman with me.

"Oh…wow…" I managed to get out as the fact that the bed was vibrating suddenly caught my attention.

She moaned a little and nodded. "It's my turn, I think…"

She just trailed off, and I let her turn us over so that she was on top…I never said 'no' to letting Lana take control…

xx

**Lana's POV**

"I think we're sick perverts." I said with a laugh as the magic fingers worked their magic on our backs, both of us lying there with our eyes closed and grins on our faces, both of us _finally _dressed. "Sick, pleased, perverts."

Dean chuckled and nodded. "If we had time to go again, I'd offer."

"If Sam and Annie were here, they'd be disturbed." I laughed, focusing on the vibrations.

"Hey," Sam said, walking into the motel room and looking at us and then sighing as Annie laughed at the sight. "You have got to be kidding me."

Sam came over and hit Dean's foot as I closed my eyes, Dean smiling and opening his mouth a little. We were enjoying the vibrating bed _far _too much, but we couldn't help it—it was like a full body massage. Add in that 'yes' we were perverts, and that's just the way that it was.

"Hey man. You have got to try this. I mean, there really is magic in the magic fingers." Dean said with a smirk.

"Dean, you're enjoying that way too much." Sam explained as he made a face. "Actually, Lan, you are too and it's kind of making me uncomfortable."

Annie laughed some more. "That makes two of us, though I'm kind of entertained."

"What am I supposed to do, Sam? I mean you guys have me under lockdown. I'm bored out of my skull and Lanni and I couldn't go another round because you two were coming back soon and we knew it." Dean protested, both of us still lying there as the bed vibrated underneath us.

"Hey! You were the bank robber on the 11 o'clock news, not me. We can't risk you just walking into a government facility." Sam explained, going over to do more research, Annie following him as the machine stopped and stopped the bed with it.

Dean groaned. "Aw, damn-it! That was our last quarter. Hey! You got any quarters?"

"No." Sam replied from the bathroom as he was washing his hands.

Dean and I sighed and I sat up, planting my hand on the bed and glancing at Dean as he asked Sam and Annie and the 'crazy hooker' and then Annie motioned to me. I kissed Dean swiftly and then got off of the bed, and headed to the door. Annie followed me and we started walking along outside so that Sam and Dean could have some time together, and so that Annie and I could.

"It could have been an angel." Annie said with a nod.

I smiled and put my hands in my pockets. "Maybe…I believe in angels, I do, but I just don't think one would really tell someone to kill someone. Isn't there a commandment against murder?"

"Have you ever heard of Avenging Angels, Lanni?" Annie asked me.

"You're right, that's a good point." I told her with a nod. "Michael, Raphael…you think this could be an Avenging Angel?"

Annie shrugged slowly. "I've learned that anything is possible."

"It really is." I told her with a nod.

I'd learned in my time with Sam and Dean—and even in my time before them—that anything was possible. Demons, ghosts, witches, werewolves, angels even…all of it could happen and it was a just a matter of figuring things out. Then again, Annie was giving me this look and I had a feeling something else was coming.

"So how do you do it?" Annie asked me.

I looked at her. "How do I do what?"

"How do you live two lives at once? I mean Jen and Kevin have kids, and you want kids. You are in love with a hunter, Lanni. Hell, you _are _a hunter, Lanni. How do you find time for everything? Including your boyfriend's sick and twisted habits…" Annie added with a smile.

I laughed a little. "I just—I guess I don't look at it as living two lives at once, Annie. I mean yeah I got all attracted to Dean and then I fell in love with him, and now we're just attached to each other—even _with_ the almost cheating."

"Wait a minute—did that son of a bitch almost _cheat_ on you?" Annie asked angrily.

"Technically we both almost cheated on each other—he just almost cheated via almost sleeping with a waitress while all I did was kiss my ex-boyfriend." I explained to her.

Annie gave me a look. "Wait, wait…_you_ almost cheated too?"

"You sound in shock." I told her with a smile on my face.

"I just—I never would have thought you had a cheating bone in you. Dean—doesn't surprise me that he almost cheated." Annie explained with a shrug. "So who's this ex-boyfriend you kissed while dating Dean? You and Sam ever together?"

"Just Lance, my high school sweetheart…it's a long story." I responded, waving it off. "Dean's the only guy I've ever slept with—boys weren't really my focus ever because I was too focused on demons and finding out about our parents."

There wasn't much else to say about any of it and Annie nodded and then a look crossed her face and I knew what it was—she wanted to catch up with me. There were things about her and about her past that she wanted me to know, and I really wanted to know what she had to say too. She was my sister and I had missed out on so much of her life…and it wasn't fair.

"So what about you, Annie? Any boyfriends I should know about?" I asked her.

Annie smiled a little. "Actually, before I moved out I ended a relationship with this guy I liked all through High School. His name's Penn. We were high school sweethearts and then I—he didn't really take kindly to the demon and ghost things I had been through. Didn't like my dreams. Couldn't handle this stuff—so I cut him loose. I had to get out and find you. I had to—"

"—try and not love him anymore?" I asked slowly.

"Yeah," Annie nodded slowly. "It was hard…he was my guy, you know? I haven't been into men since then really…just into this…into finding you and Mom…maybe even Dad."

I nodded and kicked myself mentally for what I said next. "Well maybe you'll have a 'Cassie' thing—he'll realize how much you mean to him and he'll want you back…you never know."

"What do you mean?" Annie asked me. "'Cassie' thing?"

I ran my fingers through my hair and took a deep breath, trying to figure out how to put this all into words. I wasn't sure that I _wanted_ to tell her even, but I had brought it up and it fit in this situation. Sadly…it just fit here…God help me.

"The first time I found out that Dean could love—when I realized that I had to be with him—it was because of his interaction with his ex…Cassie Robinson." I explained.

Annie raised her eyebrows at me. "Wait…what?"

"Dean told Cassie about how he was a hunter and she didn't believe him and therefore dumped him. Then she had a problem, she called him in to help her with it, and I found out he had been in love with her…and her with him…she just couldn't support his job." I told her slowly with a shrug. "The whole situation made me realize that Dean could actually love…and that I actually _wanted_ his love…so maybe he'll call you Annie—maybe he'll apologize—maybe…I don't know, Annie."

Annie shrugged and smiled. "Maybe…I just…I don't think I have the strength to do both, you know? This job _and_ a normal life…that's hard."

I nodded and draped my arm around her as she rested hers around my waist and I bit my lip. After everything that we did adding families and settling down wasn't really in the cards, but I wanted it. Someday I wanted to leave all of this behind but would that mean leaving Dean? Dean didn't want the future I wanted…did he? Maybe we should talk about this…

"Your cell phone is ringing." Annie told me.

I nodded and answered it. "Hello?"

"Hey, Lan. Where are you and Annie? Dean and I want to go to Carl's place." Sam explained to me.

"Annie, how far are we from the house of the man Gloria murdered?" I asked her.

She smiled and pointed. "It's right up the street."

"Sammy, we'll see you there." I told him, hanging up. "Dean's coming too."

"Seriously?" Annie asked me. "Even though he's wanted."

I nodded at her. "Even though he's wanted. Sam probably didn't want to leave him by himself. Besides, Dean would have tried to run off anyway."

I smiled a little at that thought because it was so like Dean—he was so restless and so in need of something to do. Wanted or not, he needed to be in the action, and I couldn't blame him—I was pretty restless too. This was what he did for a living and while I wanted him to be safe, better with us than running off and getting himself into more trouble by himself.

"Well it's not like he has anymore quarters." Annie laughed loudly. "The two of you used all of your quarters like sick perverts."

I smiled and laughed too. "Yeah, he and I _are_ sick perverts…I really can't argue with that at all."

Annie smiled at me and the two of us continued towards Carl's house, and we went up on the porch. She was just as into this hunt as I was, even though I had very little background since I hadn't gone with them to talk to Gloria. I was just pretty much making sure that Dean stayed out of trouble, and at the same time I was there when they needed me…_if_ they needed me.

"Is this the sign?" Annie asked skeptically.

I nodded at the angel Christmas decoration. "I suppose it is."

"Alrighty then," Annie said slowly. "We have to pick the lock?"

"Maybe…you think what we're looking for is inside?" I asked her.

"Give me a moment." Annie told me, and closed her eyes. "Let's try around the house."

I nodded and followed her, feeling the same feelings she was and smiling a little—we were _definitely_ related. We went through the squeaky gate and saw a cellar door and nodded slowly. Annie went straight for it and I swallowed, pushing down the feelings and staying close to Annie.

"Deepest foundations," Annie recalled with a nod. "Gloria said to his deepest foundations…"

Annie and I opened the doors and then we closed them behind us, turning on our flashlights and standing there a moment. We were looking for something here and I was pretty certain it had to do with death…there were nothing but bad vibes here and I knew that meant something. Annie turned to me and she took a deep breath and I knew something was coming.

"You're not in tune with your powers so much, are you?" Annie asked me.

I shook my head slowly. "No…no, I tried to stay away from all the powers and everything…what's in here? There's bad vibes…there's death…"

"There's a body." Annie said, leaning down and picking up a fingernail and showing it to me. Where there is a fingernail…there's probably a body."

I opened my mouth to say something, but suddenly the cellar doors opened and Annie and I turned to them and screamed. It wasn't the _best_ way to go about greeting whoever it was, but it was just Sam and Dean so the situation was a little lighter than anticipated. So Annie and I started to catch our breaths when Dean and Sam jumped at us as well.

"Holy shit!" Dean exclaimed, clutching his chest. "What the Hell are you two doing in there?"

Annie looked at him. "Gloria said Carl was guilty to his deepest foundations."

"So we figured the cellar was the best bet." I finished for her.

"Fine, steal our job." Dean said as he made a face.

"Oh shut your mouth, Mr. Jealous-Pants." Annie told him. "You're getting as bad as PMS Man here."

"What?" Sam asked as Annie and I laughed.

I shook my head. "Look, just get in here and help us dig. Annie found a fingernail and it feels like death in here."

They nodded at us and then Dean handed Sam a shovel and I smiled a little. Sam was going to dig and he looked _great_ doing it—which I shouldn't have been thinking about, but I was. So he dug a bit and uncovered a skeleton, which made me cringe a little but it was what we thought we'd find, and that was what mattered.

"So much for the innocent church going librarian," Sam said aloud.

Dean nodded at that. "Well whatever it was that talked to Gloria knew what it was talking about, I'll give you that."

"You don't believe in angels?" Annie asked, catching his tone.

Dean shook his head. "Not at all."

"Of course you don't." I told him and I felt bad that I was angry, but I was…how could he _not_ believe in angels?

"Lanni…" Dean began, but I was already up the cellar steps, Annie right behind me.

Annie took a breath. "Hard when you believe so much and the man you want doesn't believe what you do."

"Yeah…it really is." I replied, walking towards the motel without stopping.

xx

That next morning we sat in the motel room for a bit, and then Annie's stomach growled and I smiled a little. I was really hungry too, but we were all a little wary of the talking—I was kind of jumpy and I was annoyed and I didn't know why. It was probably because I kept thinking about the future, and Dean wasn't acting like he was, which was starting to make me wonder where the relationship was going. I was such a girl.

"Sammy, you think we could go and get some food?" Annie asked him.

Sam nodded and smiled. "Absolutely…what do you two want?"

"Anything is fine, Sam, you know what I like." Dean told him.

"I could really go for a chicken sandwich, maybe a Caesar salad?" I said as I looked up at Sam and smile. "I'm having cravings."

Dean chuckled. "Join the club."

Annie took a deep breath and then she went to go grab her jacket, Sam following suit and nodding. They were trying to give Dean and me space to talk and I was happy with them for it, but at the same time, it wasn't needed. Yes, we were all hungry, but there was an ulterior motive and once they left the room, I looked at Dean and he looked at me, both of us making eye contact.

"What, Lanni?" Dean asked me.

I sighed and then took a breath. "Why don't you believe in angels?"

"Because I've never seen them, Lanni. I still love you even though you have faith and you and Sammy seem to believe in all this angel crap." Dean said and he shrugged. "I don't view _you_ any differently. I understand that we grew up differently, and we have a different way of viewing things—that's why we fit so well."

"At the same time, I guess I wonder how you can't believe in the good things when we see so many bad things everyday." I said, getting up from the chair in the kitchen area and going and sitting on his bed with him.

Dean sat up. "I know. I just—I have to see things to believe them."

I let the words sink in and I realized that I couldn't change this—I had to accept this. Dean and I thought about things differently and that was just the way that it was and I couldn't change it—and I didn't _want_ to change it. If Dean decided to change his beliefs then so be it, but his beliefs were what made him…_him_.

I nodded slowly and crawled on top of him. "I guess I can understand that."

"I'm glad." Dean smiled and stroked my hair. "You have any quarters?"

I laughed loudly. "No…Annie and I never got anymore and it's a damn shame too…we're going to have to figure out some other way to pass the time."

Dean pondered that. "You bring up a very good point. No quarters? That means no magic fingers…which means we're gonna have to improvise. How long do you think Sam and Annie will be gone?"

"Not long enough for us to do anything." I told him, getting off of him.

I wanted to stay around and be with him and he knew that, but Sam and Annie were grabbing food and coming back and I wasn't really into quickies. Besides, I was feeling strange because I knew Dean so well, and yet I didn't know him at all. It had been almost two years since we'd known each other, and as in love with him as I was, there was still mystery about him…and I kind of loved it…and kind of wondered about it.

"Dean?" I asked with my back to him.

Dean didn't skip a beat. "Yeah?"

"Do you ever think about what you'll do after the demon is dead?" I asked, turning to look at him.

"I thought about it once." Dean admitted as he sat up.

"What did you see?" I asked him slowly.

Dean smiled a little. "When Jen found out the twins were alright and I found out about you and knowing things about your father in the hospital, I started thinking: you really _are _my family, Lanni—I meant that. You're always here for me, no matter what…you love me. I don't know why, I don't know how, but you do, and so I sat there and I thought that when this was all over, I was going to have you…no matter what."

I had to let all of those words sink in too because he had just been _very _open with me and I didn't know what to say. I mean he, Dean Winchester, had thought about the _future_…and he had seen _me _in it…how did I react to that? He was thinking about the same things that I was thinking about…and yet he wasn't.

"Wow." I managed to get out.

"All I got for that was a 'wow'?" Dean asked playfully.

I smiled at him. "I just—I don't know what to say…I love you."

"I know you do, and I love you too." Dean admitted.

"I—I need to take a shower." I said slowly. "I need to think about some things."

Dean gave me a strange look. "Sure."

I went into the bathroom, and I shut the door behind me, taking off my clothes and getting into the shower, letting the warm water run down my body as I stood there—he saw me in his future…he wanted to be with me…and as much as I had always wanted to hear that, it caught me off guard. Why couldn't I have thought of something else to say to him? Why had I just brushed off that moment like that when that was undoubtedly hard for him and I had wanted to hear it?

When I got out of the shower, I wrapped the towel around me and went into the main room, putting clothes on and brushing then blow-drying and brushing my hair, listening to the police radio that Dean had turned on, and smirking as he looked at the bed's vibrator with longing until Sam and Annie came in with food. He and I really _were_ sick and twisted…and not in a good way…

"Did you bring quarters?" Dean asked hopefully.

Sam looked at the bed. "Dude," he said, tossing the food at Dean, "I'm not enabling your sick habit. You're like one of those lab rats that pushes the pleasure button instead of the food button until it dies."

"What are you talking about? I eat." Dean protested as Annie and I laughed.

"Lanni? I got something for you outside." Annie said and I nodded and left the bathroom, going out of the room with her.

I had a feeling Annie wanted to spend more alone time with me, so we headed for a walk with our food and I smiled at her. There was a hunt here, but I really liked that Annie wanted to be as close to me as I wanted to be to her. She was my sister…she was my sister and I loved her, and I didn't want her to run off and get hurt.

"The angel struck again." I told her.

Annie looked at me. "Really?"

"This guy named Zack Smith killed a man and then turned himself in, just like Gloria did. He was a local drunk too, which is interesting since Gloria was a prostitute." I explained, taking my chicken sandwich from her.

"It's all about redemption I guess." Annie said with a shrug. "I know Gloria said that already, but really—this angel knows what it's talking about. How'd you know something happened?"

I shrugged at her. "Dean was listening to the police radio since I decided to take a shower."

"Ah." Annie nodded slowly. "Well let's eat before we go do anything else."

"Hopefully we'll all rest a bit before we go snooping around another house." I told her.

Annie laughed at that. "Hopefully—you and Dean haven't really had a break, have you?"

I gasped at that. "Hey! We haven't had sex all day! Besides, Dean got the victim's address though, so he wants to come and it gives us something to do that we're _supposed_ to be doing…he just has to convince Sammy now."

"The man doesn't quit," Annie laughed merrily.

"Not at all," I agreed with a nod.

We ate and talked for a bit as we walked, ending up at a park and smiling at the kids playing. When some vacated the swings we took them over, and then after a little more time had passed and we were done eating, we went back to the motel. Dean looked up when we walked in and he beamed at us—obviously he got through to Sam.

"I get to go with you guys." Dean said, the grin never leaving his face.

I smiled too. "Well then let's go."

The four of us piled into the Impala and then we had to jump over a fence and use a pocket knife to unlock a window, climb into the house using the window, and then shut it. We looked around and Sam sat at the computer, hacking into it like the super computer hacker he was. It was always nice to know we could get through this no matter what, and it was fun to see the look on Annie's face when she learned more about us.

"Wow. You guys have some interesting talents." Annie said with a nod.

I laughed and smiled. "Yeah, they certainly do."

"You find anything?" Sam asked as Dean, Annie and I looked around the house and came back to him.

"Well Frank liked his catalog shopping, that's about all we got." Dean told him. "You?"

Sam shook his head. "Not much here."

"There's not much anywhere." I replied dismally.

"Except he's got this one unlocked file on his computer that…hold on. Not anymore." Sam said having happily hacked in and then his whole demeanor changed. "God."

"What?" Dean asked him.

The look on Sam's face was kind of worrying me and I watched as Annie hurried over to look over his shoulder. I wanted to know, but the look on Sam's face was a look I had seen before, and I knew that I didn't want to know. So I just waited with Dean to let Sam tell us what was going on instead of me asking him.

"He's got e-mails—dozens of them to this lady named Jennifer." Sam explained.

"Oh, I don't want to hear this." Dean and I said together.

Annie nodded at that. "Looks like they met in a chat room."

"These e-mails are pretty personal, guys. Says here they were going to meet—today in fact." Sam told us.

"Huh. I guess if you're going to stab someone—good timing. I don't know, Man, this is weird." Dean said walking to the other side of the desk Sam was sitting at. "I mean sure, some spirits are out for vengeance, but this one's almost like a do-gooder, like a—an um—"

"Avenging angel?" Annie and Sam asked together and Dean gave them a look and walked over to a bulletin board.

Sam sighed at Dean. "Well how else do you explain it, Dean? Three guys, not connected to each other, all stabbed through the heart. At least two of them were world-class pervs and I bet if you looked deep enough at the other guy—"

"—hey." Dean said cutting him off.

"What?" Sam asked, slightly annoyed he was interrupted.

"You said Carl was a church-goer right?" Dean asked him.

I glanced between Sam and Dean because Sam was annoyed and Dean was just as annoyed, just hiding it better. Dean didn't want to believe in angels, and Sam couldn't understand why Dean _couldn't_. All I knew right then, was that the two of them were ready to fight it out, and I didn't want to be in the middle of it.

"Yeah," Sam said, still annoyed.

Dean nodded at him. "What was the name of his church?"

"Uh—Our Lady of the Angels?" Sam said, remembering.

"Of course that would be the name. Looks like Frank went to the same church." Dean explained to him.

Annie nodded authoritatively. "Well, let's go check out this church, then."

"We'll get more answers there." I said nodding in agreement.

So the four of us headed over to the church, all of us looking for answers so we could be done with this and stop having to talk about faith. While Sam and Dean talked to the reverend, Annie and I talked things out. This was pretty big, and Annie and I knew what _we_ thought it was…but it wasn't an easy thing to prove.

"Just to cover all of our bases, what if it isn't an angel?" I asked Annie.

Annie nodded slowly. "That's a good point…then maybe it's a spirit like Dean thinks."

"On the one hand, I want it to be an angel but on the other hand, I want it to be a spirit. I guess—it just…" I tried and then I took a deep breath and just trailed off as I shrugged.

"'Thou shalt not kill'?" Annie asked me.

I nodded at her and found my voice. "Exactly—if it were really an angel, it wouldn't ask them to kill someone else. The people who sin will be judged themselves at the gates…then again its avenging angels right? I mean they could have orders but wouldn't they do the deed themselves?"

"I get what you mean." Annie told me, nodding at me and then just nodding.

"You don't think that maybe there is something in the church that might be the cause, do you?" I asked her.

Annie shrugged at me. "We should cover all of our bases."

"Then let's look around outside." I told her softly.

Annie nodded in agreement, and we looked around out back and kept pretty silent because we didn't know what to say anymore. It was pretty much the two of us trying to make sense of everything and figure out what was going on, but talking about everything was getting tiring. When we found nothing, we went out front and met up with Sam and Dean talking to the pastor—we saw a memorial, and we looked at the boys.

"Dead priest—murdered in fact." Dean told us to catch us up.

"Were his last rites administered?" I asked them.

Sam shook his head. "No."

"Maybe he's who we're looking for then." Annie said a she shoved her hands in her pockets.

I nodded slowly. "Maybe…"

Annie and Dean went inside first to go and see Father Gregory's grave, and I looked at Sam, taking his hand. He was still my rock and I knew that he felt about this the way that I did and I knew I could count on him. It wasn't that I couldn't count on Dean because I could—it was just that I couldn't talk to Dean about faith because it wasn't something that he had…it wasn't something he understood.

"Sammy, you look a bit shaken." I told him.

"Dean um…I told him I pray everyday and I dunno how he's taking it." Sam explained with a soft nod.

I nodded at him. "That's okay, Sammy. He's just—this faith thing is new to him."

"I know. How are _you_ taking that?" Sam asked me, making me look at him. "I mean I know how much faith _you_ have, Lan."

I shrugged and put on a brave smile. "As well as I can."

"You don't think that maybe this makes everything with him harder?" Sam asked me.

He hadn't meant it in any way in particular, he was just trying to make sure that I was all right and he knew which questions to ask—which things to make me think about. I glanced at the ground and then looked back up at Sam and I knew exactly what the next words out of my mouth were going to be.

I shook my head. "I don't think that at all—I think that he has a good reason for it all."

Sam nodded slowly. "Let's go, Lan."

We followed the other two into the church, Sam and I dropping our hands and smiling at each other. The two of us knew what we were doing and could handle ourselves without the Winchester men, and it was kind of nice to find things for ourselves. Then when we had joined them, Sam and Dean hung back while Annie and I hurried down to where the priests were buried and we nodded at each other.

"Wormwood," Annie said aloud.

I swallowed. "It's associated with spirits that aren't at rest."

"Then we know what we're dealing with, but Sam will need more convincing I think. Where is Sam?" Dean asked as he joined us.

"Still out there I think." I replied, and he nodded and went to look for him.

Annie turned to me. "While Dean goes and talks to Sam, you think maybe we should go ahead and get the supplies for a séance?"

"Yeah…that's probably best." I told her with a nod.

Annie and I left the church while Sam and Dean talked about how even though Sam had seen an angel, Dean didn't think that was what it was. That's why he had been behind—he had been visited by an angel and Dean was still convinced it was a spirit. Annie and I needed a break from them and we were on our way to the store when Jen called, and she sounded really freaked out.

"Jen, honey, what's wrong?" I asked her.

Jen took a deep breath. "Kevin…he's been kidnapped…_again_. I need you—now."

"Annie, Kevin has been kidnapped." I explained to her.

"The boys can finish things. We need to get to Jen." Annie told me. "I'm going with you."

"Jen, we're on our way." I told her, as I smiled at Annie, and then I hung up with Jen and I called Dean and told him he and Sam had to finish the case and meet us in Kansas.

**Note: Okay so there is another chapter that will be up tonight hopefully so you guys can see what else I have in store for you. I hope you guys are still enjoying this story! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	16. Lana Wants to be What?

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**So this chapter is kind of a filler but it's REALLY important and leads up to next chapter's cliffhanger and there are some new characters.**

**Only two of them actually come back later.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Annie and I were worried the entire time while we were on the plane—if Kevin was kidnapped then that meant that Jen was all alone and pregnant at the moment. On top of that, if he was kidnapped, then who was behind it? Who would do that? Was Jen going to be all right until we got there?

"I think Chelsea did it." Annie said as I asked myself questions in my head.

I turned to her. "Really?"

"Yes," Annie nodded, "and this time we're going to take her out."

"I think that's a good idea." I told her. "It's just that…we don't know _how_ to kill her and you know it, Annie…we've talked about this."

She nodded and the two of us talked for a little while before the plane landed and we had to get a taxi. Even in the taxi we were both really fidgety, and when we finally got to Jen's, we practically ran up to the door and ran inside. We were worried and we needed to make sure that Jen was all right—that everyone was all right.

"Jen?" I called out.

_I'll be there in a moment, loud one…quiet, Lan._ She said in my mind.

_Sorry_. I replied in hers and then I turned to Annie as I blushed just a little bit. "She's as disturbed as ever by my loudness but she's here."

_Make yourselves at home_. Jen told me.

"She wants us to make ourselves at home." I said, and Annie nodded.

"Yeah she told me that too." Annie smiled at me.

Annie and I sat on the couch and as she turned on the television low, I shoved my hand into my pocket and I pulled out my cell. I looked at my phone, hoping the boys would have called by now, but no one had…they must be hunting. I wanted to know what was going on and whether it was a spirit or an angel…I really wanted to know.

"Worried?" Annie asked me.

I shrugged. "Maybe a little."

"I have a lead—well—it's pretty much exactly the same thing that happened last time." Jen said as she came into the living room.

"What do you mean?" Annie asked her.

Jen sighed loudly. "Well, last time we dealt with Chelsea, as in last time she kidnapped someone, she left a note—I got a note about an hour ago telling us where to meet her."

"Us? You're not going anywhere." I told her.

"Lan, don't start with me. My husband is the one who was kidnapped." Jen told me angrily.

I took a deep breath and channeled my 'inner Sam'. "But you have the babies in your stomach to worry about. You can't just go gallivanting off and putting yourself in danger."

"You mean the way _you_ did?" Jen asked me, putting her hands on her hips.

I frowned at her. "And look at what happened, Jen…I miscarried."

It hurt me that she would bring that up—I _knew_ that hunting is what made me lose my baby…that _Chelsea_ was the reason why I could no longer have children…still this wasn't right. Jen was a _mother_ now practically, and I didn't want her to get into any trouble and she knew that…and yet she was _still_ insisting on this. Annie and I could do this on our own—why was she doing this? I couldn't let Jen die…I couldn't let her lose her children or her ability to have children…I just couldn't.

"But you're fine, Lan. I know that you lost Casey, and I know that hurt you, and I'm sorry, but you came out of it fine, and so will I." Jen told me firmly. "You forget I'm stronger than you—my powers are more honed."

I bit my lip. "We wait until the boys come so we have back up."

"We need to do this sooner rather than later." Jen informed me.

"I think that pregnant women should learn not to hunt." Annie said as I nodded.

Jen looked at her. "Why?"

"Because in the long run, all you do is lose your family." I explained to her.

If Jen wasn't going to listen to reason, then we were going to go ahead and do this in the most practical way possible. I trusted Sam and Dean with my life, and I knew that no matter what happened, they would protect Jen like she was part of the family, and she already was. Kevin needed to be all right…because if he wasn't, hunting for me ended here…Jen was going to need me without him and I wasn't about to abandon her—never.

Jen nodded slowly. "Right—I'll be right back then."

"Jen…we can't do this tonight." Annie told her. "Not if you have to go too."

Jen turned to her. "Why not?"

Annie took a deep breath. "Because the boys are driving here."

"It's going to take them a couple days." I added slowly. "Are you sure you don't want Annie and I to just take care of this?"

Jen sighed loudly. "Fine…we have to come up with a strategy anyway…you two hungry?"

I took a deep breath as Annie nodded and I kind of decided to just give in because what could I do? Jen was determined to save her husband, who was the father of her children and I got that as much as I was against it. I understood her from both sides and I was actually hungry so I just decided that we were going to go with mine and Annie's plan and if food came with that, then so be it.

"Actually, yes." I told her.

Annie raised her eyebrows at me. "You've sure eaten a lot today."

"I guess I'm just _really_ hungry." I shrugged.

"You've been really hungry for the past few days." Annie laughed.

I just rolled my eyes at her because I didn't feel like my eating habits were any different than they had ever been. Jen was making a face like she understood me, and that she knew that I was just a hungry person, but then we both looked at Annie and everything changed. I felt my face flush a little when Annie started to look at me strangely and I realized what was coming out of her mouth before it did.

"You're not like…pregnant or anything are you?" Annie asked me. "Because that would explain all the food, and all the sex and—"

"—I'll whip up some dinner." Jen cut in hurriedly and left the room.

I looked at her. "You want some help?"

"Nah, you two rest. I have to do something to keep my mind off of things." Jen assured us and then she nodded slowly and left the room.

Annie looked at me. "So…what was _that_ about?"

I took a deep breath and motioned to the couch, Annie taking a seat and focusing all attention on me. This was hard for me to put into words but I knew there was no way past it—she had every right to know, and it wasn't like I hadn't mostly coped with it. So…I had to just get it all off of my chest.

"I can't have kids." I explained to Annie slowly. "I was pregnant and I lost the baby—Chelsea shot me, I had to have surgery, and I lost the baby…and the ability to conceive. So trust me, the hunger and the horny feelings are all natural."

Annie nodded slowly and took my hand. "I'm _really _sorry, Lan."

"It's okay…I've pretty much coped with it now. I mean it still hurts to think about obviously, but what's done is done and there's no changing it." I explained to her with a nod and then I looked at my phone again. "I swear if he doesn't call in the next—" I said, but them Dean's phone called mine and I answered. "Finally!"

"Sorry, Lanni." Dean told me, keeping a chuckle mostly in. "Sam and I were talking about some things."

I nodded at that. "How did the case go?"

"Was it angels?" Annie asked loudly so Dean could hear her.

"No, it wasn't angels. It was Father Gregory's spirit, but…Sam saw it, right? He was told to go and kill this guy that turned out to be bad news." Dean explained to me and I know he was still turning it all over in his head.

"It wasn't an angel." I told Annie, and then talked to Dean again. "Well the spirit was right about the others too."

"Yes but…when I chased him in my car, he got into an accident and this bar from this truck went through his windshield—and right into his heart." Dean added and then picked up after a pause. "It was—it was kind of freaky."

"Wow." I said nodding. "It's almost like it was really—"

"—God's will?" Dean finished for me. "Yeah…I'm still trying to get my head around it. So what's up with Kevin?"

I smiled a little at the fact that he was still turning over everything in his head, and that he was that much closer to being back with me. Also, it was nice that he sounded so worried about Kevin—that he cared so much about my other family. He was perfect…and I just wanted to be with him forever…was that too much to ask? Why was I so afraid to _tell_ him that? To explain my intentions to him?

"Well, Chelsea kidnapped him." I told him. "We can't leave until you guys get here, either—Jen is insisting that she go and I refuse to let that happen because we both know what happened to pregnant women when they try to hunt."

"Of course—Sam and I can get there by tomorrow night maybe." Dean assured me. "Another night I spend without you…you really do owe me."

I smiled and nodded. "Yeah I do. I'll miss you tonight as well."

"Well I'm going to go ahead and turn in for the night, and we'll start driving out there more later all right?" Dean asked me.

"All right." I told him. "I love you."

"I love you too." Dean told me, and then we hung up.

"Kevin has a PS2, a GameCube and an XBOX." Annie said with a grin and an approving nod. "This is freaking cool."

I smiled at her. "Well let's play something before we eat."

xx

I woke up to laughter downstairs and dragged myself out of bed, my cell in hand, to go and see what was up. I hadn't bothered to fix my clothes or brush my hair, and when I got to the bottom of the stairs and saw Annie talking to three boys I hadn't seen since high school, I ran my fingers through my hair quickly and pulled it back. This was awkward and yet at the same time _completely_ awesome—it was nice to see them.

"Morning, Lan!" Michael exclaimed with a grin. "I haven't seen you since graduation!"

"Yeah," I told him, smiling too. "What a surprise."

Annie smiled at me. "Karl was delivering our paper and he said he recognized me—took me a moment to remember that I broke his GI Joe before…yeah."

"I remember that." I told him and then I smiled and held open my arms for a hug at the third guy there. "How are you Lance?"

Lance smirked at me and I suddenly felt as if I was naked under his gaze but I accepted the hug and I was glad to see him. Lance had been my high school boyfriend…the on/off boyfriend that knew everything about me…even about demons and ghosts and my powers. He was just as attractive as he had always been, and yet I hadn't ever thought I'd see these guys again…I thought kissing Lance would be the last time.

"I'm doing fine, and I see you are too." He said with a smile as we pulled away from each other.

I smiled and blushed a little. "What brings you all here this morning?"

"We were all going down to the bowling alley after Karl was done with his route—yes in the morning—and we thought we'd check in with Jen and Kevin, but Annie tells us that Kevin is on a business trip." Michael explained with a shrug.

"Yeah, so…um…" I began and then trailed off.

Karl took the moment to speak up. "Why didn't you tell use Annie was still alive?"

I knew that the question would come up eventually, but I didn't know how to answer it—it was far too early in the morning for me to think something up. Lucky for me Annie had been up longer and she had a story all ready to share so I was pretty much good to go and ready to let her do this.

"Because she wasn't sure that I was going to get better and our parents told her not to." Annie explained to them. "After I got sick and everything you know, they just kept me at the hospital."

Lance nodded slowly, skeptical. "It must have sucked to spend the last 16 years in the hospital."

"Well part of it she spent at a rehabilitation clinic." I told them as Annie nodded.

"Wow. Hard life." Karl told her, smiling.

Annie shrugged and smiled a little. "There are harder things out there."

"So…you guys staying for breakfast?" I asked them.

"Jen went to go and get some donuts." Annie informed me.

I nodded and smiled at them all again as my cell phone rang and I silently thanked the Gods for that. I looked at the cover and I couldn't keep my grin at bay—hearing from Dean was honestly the best thing in the world.

"Excuse me a moment." I told them all, going into the kitchen and picking up. "Hey, Baby. Good morning."

"Morning," Dean said happily. "We're getting breakfast."

I smiled and nodded. "Jen went to go and get us donuts because there are people here."

"People?" Dean asked me.

"Like people from elementary through high school." I told him. "It's weird. I mean I never really expected to see any of them again, but I woke up and Annie was talking to them all like we'd never been apart."

"Oh, so like, old friends?" Dean asked like he was fine with me having people to talk to.

I nodded slowly. "Um…well…sure."

"Sure?" He asked me. "You just said you've known them since elementary school—they know Annie."

I bit my lip and took a breath because I knew if Dean told me that there were three girls from his past there and one was his ex _I'd_ be upset. Then again all of the girls in Dean's past were his _special friends_ so I had every license to be worried there. Maybe it wouldn't worry Dean at all…maybe I'd be fine.

"My ex is among them, so 'sure' is the best thing I could come up with." I admitted to him as I shrugged.

Dean paused and then took in a breath of air. "Your _ex_? Like the one you kissed? Do I have to beat this guy up?"

"No, you don't." I told him with a laugh. "As sexy as it is that you're now jealous and protective, you have absolutely nothing to worry about, I promise you."

"You up for a video game match?" Lance asked, showing up out of nowhere. "Annie's getting all excited about versus on some fighting game, so are you in, Cookie?"

"Who was that? The ex?" Dean asked suddenly. "Sam…get in the car, we're getting food to go."

I paused at the high school nickname and then what Dean said registered. "Baby, you don't have to get food to go—you can sit down and eat with Sam, it's all right."

"Right, and let you and this ex of yours resolve some sexual tension? I don't think so." Dean replied and I knew his mind was set.

"Dean, Lance and I do not have _any_ unresolved sexual tension." I told him. "He's not my Cassie, so you're fine."

"Really?" Lance asked, and I knew he was joking but Dean didn't.

Dean made a derisive noise. "He better be there when I get there because I want to punch him in the face. I love you, and I'll see you soon. He touches you, and he's as good as a demon."

I smiled at that a bit—I _loved _him when he was possessive. "I love you too, see you soon."

I hung up and then I burst out laughing and Lance raised his eyebrows at me and I just smiled and shook my head. It was kind of nice to know that Lance was still the guy that I remembered, and I hadn't realized that he and Dean had _anything _in common, but they did and I was glad to see him. At the same time, I knew that I shouldn't be so happy to see him when he was my ex, I'd kissed him not that long ago and Dean was so _not _okay with him.

"So you have a boyfriend?" Lance asked me smiling.

"Yeah…" I nodded at him and then showed him the promise ring. "We're pretty serious too. He gave me this promise ring and I'm pretty definitely sure that he's the guy I was meant for."

Lance nodded at me. "Well I'm happy for you, Cookie."

"Thanks, I'm happy about it too, Cupcake." I told him.

Lance laughed at the High School nickname, and then we smiled at each other and Annie came bursting into the kitchen. She seemed so happy to see people from her past and to get to be somewhat normal and after our talk, I wanted her to just be happy and be free. I wanted her to have a normal life…being home just made me think about that more and I knew I shouldn't…because what if Dean definitely _didn't_ want to have that?

"Do you mind if I go hang out with the boys until Sam and Dean show up?" Annie asked me and then she pulled the puppy dog pout on me. "Please…please, please, please, please, please?"

"I don't mind." I admitted with a laugh. "Have fun, but be back before dark all right?"

Annie smiled at me. "You sound like Mom."

"Thanks," I told her, loving the compliment.

Annie nodded and hugged me before she went back out of the room and Jen arrived with the donuts. Once we had all eaten some breakfast, Annie and the boys left to go and hang out a bit, and I turned to Jen as she breast-fed Kaydence, Minah still playing in the play pen happily. She was the perfect mother, and I really wished her all the happiness in the world—she deserved it _so_ much.

"That was weird." I told Jen.

Jen laughed a little. "Because you're used to being cut off from the world?"

"Exactly," I nodded at her.

"Then add on the ex on top of it all, and it's a lot to handle." Jen added with a nod.

I shrugged at that. "Seeing Lance wasn't a huge deal, but it made Dean kind of jealous."

Jen smiled at me and I looked at her and I smiled too—having Dean jealous was fun, and yet I felt bad for milking it like I felt like I was. I mean I was letting him know that I was his and he had nothing to worry about, but at the same time I _liked _him jealous…I was willing to keep him that way just a little bit longer.

"I bet you _loved_ that." Jen told me.

I nodded at her. "I kind of like it when he's jealous and possessive, even though he has no reason to be. I'm his, and he knows he has me."

"You look like you need to do something." Jen told me when I paused.

"I need to go home." I explained to her.

xx

When I got to my house, I looked at the door and I ran my fingers along it—I was glad to be home. It was my house, and it was the place I had called 'home' for so long but…for some reason I really couldn't see it that way anymore…not unless Dean was there. What was that? I was happy and then I wasn't happy because I was devastated about losing a baby, and then I was happy again. But now, suddenly, I couldn't be happy because I wanted to be Dean's wife.

Wait a minute…I wanted to be Dean's _wife_? I had thought about potentially wanting to be married to Dean, but that was really what I _wanted_? I just nodded to myself and then I unlocked the door and walked inside, trying to forget about what I was thinking about right then. I mean in any _normal _relationship that was going this well this would be a normal chain reaction, right? No, no—I was _thinking _about it again.

"Well hello, House." I said as I shut the front door behind me.

I smiled as I looked around and every feeling that I had was telling me that I knew that I needed to be here. I wanted the albums, I wanted to sleep in here—I wanted to be in this house. I tried all of the lights and I smiled because the electric, gas and water bills had all been paid—Jen kept on top of that. Going upstairs, I looked around and then found the album I had come here for, but for some reason I didn't really want to leave the house—I loved my house. I missed it—almost as much as I missed Dean.

"Maybe I'll stay here and find something to do." I told the house. "We can get reacquainted and all that jazz."

So I sat down and wandered around, and went out to buy a little food and came back and hung out at my house by myself. Jen was doing fine with some work she had to get done and Annie was probably having a lot of fun with the boys, not to mention that Sam and Dean were driving and probably talking about something fun. My house and I were happy together, so forget everyone else.

I ended up putting a movie into the television I had moved up into my room, and I watched that while vegging out, eating junk food and lounging around in my nightgown. It was a vampire movie, and I loved it, and by then I had already told Jen and Annie that I was staying here and that Annie was welcome to come here too. I was happily eating some homemade apple pie when I got a call from Dean.

"Hello, Baby." I answered happily.

"Hey, Baby." He replied with a chuckle. "I was letting you know that we'll be there tomorrow—Kevin still alive?"

I nodded at that. "Jen called earlier and told me he was fine, and Chelsea had a time and place for us to meet her at tomorrow so I'm just here at _my_ house all alone."

"Good." He told me. "Well not the _alone_ part—Sam and I are trying to get there as fast as possible."

"I know, Baby. You're doing the best you can do." I replied with a nod. "I'm entertained with TV, I promise."

Dean chuckled and I knew he was shaking his head. "What are you watching?"

"I am watching Bram Stoker's _Dracula_." I replied, trying to sound Transylvanian. "I kind of love it, and Gary Oldman is sexy as sin."

"I can't believe you like trashy vampire movies…even though Winona Ryder was _hot_ in that movie." Dean laughed and made a sound I knew all too well which made me laugh too because he was adorable.

I rolled my eyes too. "Sounds like someone _else_ watches trashy vampire movies too—and for the record I actually _don't_ like trashy vampire movies…just Bram Stoker."

"Whatever you need to tell yourself, Baby," Dean told me with another laugh. "I'll let you go to watch your movie and I'll see you as soon as possible."

I smiled and focused on his voice. "I love you, Dean."

"I know…I love you too, Lanni." Dean told me. "I'll see you soon."

I nodded and we hung up, me smiling a bit because he was honestly perfect—he didn't say 'I love you' because he wanted to…he said it because he knew I wanted/need to hear it. It wasn't that he didn't love me—he did and I _knew_ that—it was just that 'love' wasn't a word that Dean Winchester said a lot…but he knew me well enough to use it now.

I smiled and nodded, finishing my movie and going to sleep, snuggled into the bed and woke up in the middle of the night to arms wrapped around me. I recognized that watch anywhere, and so I turned over and smiled at Dean, kissing his lips softly. He'd stripped off all of his clothes and climbed into bed with me, and I was so happy to have him with me again.

"How'd you get in?" I asked, running my fingers along his bare torso.

Dean smiled a little, his eyes closed. "Jen gave me her key."

"What time is it?" I asked him softly, kissing his chest.

"Feels like five minutes since I crawled into bed." He answered, opening his eyes.

I smiled and kissed his lips this time, moving my body closer to his because I wanted to be closer to him. He slid his fingers into my hair as he kissed me back and held onto me, and I felt perfect. Dean was here, I was home, and I was loved and wanted…there was absolutely nothing else that I could ask for…

"You were driving fast, weren't you?" I asked him.

"Maybe a little," He shrugged and cupped my chin. "Where's my punching bag?"

I smiled at him. "I have absolutely no idea."

Dean smiled at me when I said that and kissed me again, kissing me a little harder when I ran my fingers along his chest and I smiled. We both knew where this was going, but it was no fun without a little banter…a little talking. Dean knew that, and when he pulled away and looked at me, stroking my jaw with his thumb, he smirked and it was all about to start here and then continue on.

"You remember this bed?" He asked me softly.

I nodded at him. "Yes…yes I do."

"You remember what happened in this bed the first time we met?" He asked again, elaborating on what he had said before.

"One big happy blur." I replied with a smile.

Dean nodded and returned my smile with one of his own. "You know…you still owe me $15.78."

"I bet I know something I can do that's worth more than $15.78." I told him, and kissed him as he wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

I climbed on top of him and pressed my body to his, his right hand rubbing down my leg to my hip, and sliding my nightgown up my leg. I ran my lips down to his neck, and he smiled as I bit his neck softly like I knew he liked and we both made a face when my cell phone went off. I wouldn't normally reach over and just answer my phone—I was learning from my mistakes and Dean was in the mood right now—but I recognized the ringtone and _had_ to answer it.

"Don't get it." Dean whispered, moving his fingers in ways that I was used to. "I'm kind of enjoying this."

I smiled, nodded, and pulled back. "It's Jen's ringtone…I _have_ to get it—it's probably about Kevin."

"Fine," he said, and he pouted as I sat up on him a little straighter and put the phone up to my ear.

"Hi, Jen." I told her.

Jen didn't waste anytime talking. "Can we please get on saving Kevin now? It's almost time for us to leave to get to the warehouse."

"It's really that late?" I asked her and nodded when she told me it was. "Yeah, Dean and I will be there soon."

I hung up and got off of Dean, watching him get up and go to grab his clothes. I honestly didn't know if he had brought Sam with him or left him at Jen's, and I sighed a little and got up, wrapping my arms around his torso before he had a chance to put his shirt on. He knew we had to do this, but at the same time he really didn't want to, and when I kissed his back softly, he relaxed a bit. It was the perfect time to talk to him and I knew I could make it up to him if I tried hard enough.

"After we save Kevin, we're going to need a bath don't you think?" I asked him with a soft shrug, kissing his back again.

Dean chuckled and I loved the feeling of his muscles moving as my body was pressed against his. Everything about this man was magical, and I really wished I didn't have to let him go either, but as happy as I was right then, Jen wasn't…and Jen meant _everything_ to me. Her husband was missing and I needed to help her to find him—so Dean was just going to have to wait, and he understood that…just another thing about him that made him so damn wonderful.

"Absolutely," he replied with a nod.

"I really do love you, you know. If I could spend _every_ waking moment with you, I would." I told him. "I meant what I said about not wanting to live without you."

Dean turned around and kissed me tenderly. "I don't want to live without you either, Lanni."

"You know, I don't think I deserve you." I told him softly, running my fingers along his abs slowly.

"No…you deserve _better_ than me, but you _chose_ me, and that's what matters." He said with a cheeky grin on his face.

I laughed a little and kissed him, pulling away reluctantly. "The faster we save Kevin, the faster we get to do what _we_ want to do."

"Then let's go." Dean replied with a nod.

xx

"I want to kill Chelsea this time, guys—once and for all." Jen said and then she sighed. "We need that fucking rune."

I smiled at her a little. "I haven't heard you swear in a while Jen…I kinda missed it. Sam? Dean?"

"Yeah, Lan?" Sam answered with a smile on his face because of what I'd said to Jen.

"The girls and I need you two to stay here—secure the perimeter of the house." I explained to them.

Dean shook his head. "No way—Sam and I aren't just letting you three run off up against Chelsea again. Don't you remember what happened last time?"

"Annie, Jen and I are going to be fine, Dean. Jen and I have Annie this time if Chelsea tries to get away." I told him and took a breath. "You and Sammy will be just fine. Chelsea will kill Kevin if either of you are there, and judging by how strong she is now, that's not an exaggeration."

"I need you to stay here in case it's a trap and she's trying to infiltrate for some of my magical odds and ends, okay?" Jen asked them with that cute, pleading face that she pulled so well. "I picked you guys out special for this task."

Sam tried to hold back a laugh. "Oh…well that's better."

I nodded in agreement. "You'll be fine, I promise."

The three of us just really wanted to get out there and find Chelsea—kill her in a way that would make her stay away longer this time. Jen had already figured out some perimeter spells so that this wouldn't happen again, and Annie was pretty sure once we did this, Chelsea would have a new target anyway—we just didn't know if it would be her or me…we'd have to wait and see on that.

"All right…we'll do it." Dean said with a nod.

"Thanks, Baby." I smiled at him and squeezed his hand.

He nodded at me. "But you owe me."

"I know." I laughed as he smiled a little, and then I turned to Jen and Annie. "Let's go guys…it's now or never."

Annie nodded at that, and then she, Jen and I left the house to go and meet Chelsea where she had wanted us to meet her. As we walked, Annie handed us each these pendants she and Jen had made the night before—they were to ward of vampires. The two of them had bonded with each other and Sam while Dean and I were in our house all on our own and I was glad they all got along—that both of my families got along.

"So the plan is that I go on in, rough her up a bit, and then Jen takes out the guards and you go for the rune?" Annie asked me.

I nodded at her. "Exactly…but I'm still worried about the pregnant woman being here."

"Me too, but she's a meat head and wants to be here." Annie nodded too, and we came to the building and looked at each other.

"Ready?" Jen asked us, rolling her eyes. "If something happens I will put up a shield and call for help, alright? Now are you ready? Because we have to have our wits about us so she doesn't do anything to Kevin, all right?"

Annie and I nodded and assured her that we were ready for this, and while Jen and Annie went inside, I scaled the building and got to the top floor, smiling when I saw Chelsea. She was just as I had always left her—that cheeky redhead with the attitude and the annoying habit of hurting what I loved. She saw me and she smirked, both of us standing there and facing each other.

"Well, well, well. What have we here?" Chelsea asked me.

I smiled a little. "It's time for you to stop coming back, Chelsea."

"I'm not ready to go just yet, Lanni." Chelsea replied, smiling a toothy smile at me. "Besides…you don't know _how_ to kill me for once and for all."

"Don't call me that." I told her firmly. "You lost that right when you became a vampire."

"Are we just going to stand around talking?" Chelsea asked me in a bored voice.

I gave her a look. "We used to be best friends, Chelsea—you, Jen and I did _everything_ together. We _trained_ you."

The plan hadn't been for me to come in and talk to her, but I felt so bad for what Jen and I had turned her into. She had to have _some_ ounce of decency still left in her, didn't she? I mean there had been a time that I had wanted to murder her for what she'd done to me—for killing my baby—but she was still my friend…I mean she could still be my friend, couldn't she? Or was I just trying to be as optimistic about that as Jen had once been when Chelsea was in fact really gone?

"You got me turned into this." Chelsea said, and part of me honestly found some humanity behind it. "You made me this disgusting being. There are vampires who don't feed on humans, Lanni. There are vampires who wish they weren't vampires. You—you made me this way…own up to it."

"But I _am_ owning up to it, Chels. I _have_ owned up to it." I admitted to her. "I miss you. I'm so sorry I did this to you…I wish you could forgive me."

She nodded at my words. "I wish I could too."

"I know Jen and I made this mistake, but we can't be held responsible for what you've done since you turned. Not that I want to point fingers either…but you _did_ go use yourself as bait and wouldn't let Jen and I follow you." I reminded her.

"Yeah, I know I did, but you guys never made me feel included. You always made me feel like the weak link—like you just tolerated me." Chelsea explained to me with a nod. "After the fire, you were different, Lanni. You didn't care about anyone anymore and don't deny that. You just—you just wanted to kill demons. Then I died, and something snapped—you realized how much I meant to you, but not before I was already gone. Jen's the only one with real feelings around here…she and Kevin…I mean you didn't even realize how much you wanted Dean until he was dying—until I kidnapped him."

I nodded sadly. "You're right, Chels…but I'd like to think that I've grown since then…that I'm a different person than the shell of one I was after my parents were murdered. I'm sorry I never made you feel like you meant something to me…because you did…you really did. Chels, if you don't stop now, you understand I have to kill you, right?"

"I can't let you kill me, Lanni." Chelsea said as she shook her head. "As much as it pains me to do this, I have to kill you…I have my orders…"

"Then so be it, Chels. I'll miss you even more when you're gone for good." I promised her with a sad smile.

Chelsea came at me, but I raised my force field, causing her to hiss when she hit it. As I lunged at her, Annie and Jen came into the room, and Jen grabbed the rune while Annie kicked Chelsea in the face as Chelsea threw me across the room. I hit the wall hard and felt the wind get knocked out of me, looking up as Chelsea's attention was now on Annie.

"You brought Little Annie." Chelsea said, standing up and wiping the blood off of her lip, smiling. "This plan is working out perfectly."

She went for Annie, but Annie was too quick for her, using her powers to throw Chelsea into a wall, but not before Chelsea had thrown a knife, it hitting Annie in the side. I got to my feet and headed for them, appalled that Annie was now stabbed, but something made me pause. I could have sworn that Annie's eyes were flashing black, and I swallowed and closed my eyes for a moment before opening them again to make sure I had seen that correctly.

"You stupid…" Annie began, and pulled the knife out, her eyes flashing more—I had never been afraid of my sister until that very moment.

"Lanni's father will be proud of you, Annie…embracing your powers like that…you'll see me once more. Goodbye, Jenny." Chelsea whispered, smiling at Jen and I before Annie used her powers to rip Chelsea's head off of her body, blood getting on all three of us before she turned to ashes.

"How did you do that?" Jen asked cautiously.

Annie shook her head and her eyes returned to normal. "I don't know…I really…I don't know."

Jen and I nodded at her and decided together _not_ to bring up what had just gone down—not to ask about Annie's eyes flashing. The scariest part was that I could have sworn I'd seen my sister partially go full demon on me. To top it off, what exactly had Chelsea meant by 'Lanni's father'? Was it possible that this was just all some trap? Just a trap to get Annie to embrace the psychic powers within her…did this have to do with the demon's plan? Was my father _the_ demon?

"She's sorry, Jen." I told Jen, changing the subject to Chelsea. "She was really sorry."

"Chelsea?" Jen asked me skeptically.

I nodded slowly. "I think I might have gotten through to her."

"You think this was all part of the demon's plan?" Annie asked us, changing the subject back to the _important_ things.

"Anything is possible, Annie." I told her with a sad smile.

Annie nodded and bit her lip. "I really hope she didn't mean the demon."

I nodded again because I had hoped she hadn't meant him too. Then it hit me for a moment—Annie's eyes had flashed black and she was a psychic because of _the_ demon and back in high school while using my powers, my eyes had had flecks of yellow in them. _Yellow_…the color of _the demon's_ eyes…what if…no…that would be ridiculous. I wasn't going to give it another moment of thought because it was just a _ridiculous_ notion.

"Jenny?" Came Kevin's voice. "You shouldn't have come pregnant!"

"In all of this, I almost forgot about Kevin!" I cried, hurrying over to the closet in the room and all of us letting him out.

"Thank you for forgetting me." Kevin told me and then looked around as Jen hugged him. "What the—there's blood everywhere."

Jen nodded into him. "Annie killed Chelsea…I just wish it was for once and for all."

"Wow." Kevin told her. "You must be quite the powerful one."

Annie still looked really shaken up and Kevin rubbed his head as I reached over and pulled Annie to me. I wanted her to feel like she was going to be all right, even though I was freaked out too—I mean she'd done that to Chelsea _with her mind_. What else could she do? What the Hell was going on around here?

"Kevin, are you all right?" Jen asked him, looking him over for cuts and bruises.

"I think I'll be okay." He assured her with a smile. "I'm just a little roughed up. She never actually intended to hurt me…this was all a trap."

Jen nodded and then she smiled. "I'm just really happy nothing happened to you and as you can see, other than some stained clothes, nothing happened to me or the twins."

"Let's get back to the boys." I replied, taking Annie's hand and looking her in the eye. "It's going to be all right, Annie."

Annie just nodded, though I wasn't quite sure she believed me—why should she? I didn't know what was going on or what all of this meant, but we had the rune…which meant we were that much closer to figuring everything out. Knowing Jen though, she wanted to study it first—Kevin would _demand _she do that anyway—and so we just shook things off, and went back to the house and Dean came over to us.

"You're covered in blood." He said, looking us all over.

I nodded and shrugged. "Annie killed Chelsea in a pretty violent manner."

"Well I guess I'm glad to hear it." Dean told her.

Annie just nodded and went into the downstairs guest room and Dean gave me a look as Jen and Kevin went upstairs to get cleaned up. He knew something was up with her and I took a deep breath, knowing I had to fess up. Just in case though, I was going to have to fib a little like every other demon part of my past…I was getting sick of it. Dean deserved to know…he deserved to know that my father was a demon…but now?

"What's going on?" He asked me.

"Annie…Annie's eyes flashed before she killed Chelsea. Annie—Annie's afraid because Chelsea said the demon would be proud of her." I explained, looking at the floor and then back up into his eyes. "I just—I was actually afraid of her for a moment."

I felt my lip tremble and Dean wrapped his arms around me and then rested his fingers under my chin, lifting my face up so he could look my in the eye. He kissed me even though I was blood-splattered, and I was really glad that he was here to help me through this. There were so many things running through my mind and I knew I couldn't handle them all on my own.

"Annie's not just going to go evil, Lanni. We'll save her _and_ Sam—I _promise_ you that." He told me. "You believe me, don't you?"

I believed him so I nodded. No matter what ever happened in our lives, I believed him and I trusted him…and I _loved_ him. I loved him more than _anything_—more than life. I felt all sappy and mushy around him, and when I talked about him to everyone else I was bordering on sickening…but it was true…he had to know where I stood with him…had to know that I wanted to be his wife—he deserved that much.

"I love being with you, Dean. I want to be with you forever and I don't ever want you to question where I'm going to be. I want to be in your future, and I want it to be official, because I want to prove to you how _much_ I love you." I whispered, kissing him softly.

Dean stroked my hair. "What are you trying to say, Lanni?"

I opened my mouth to say something when Annie came out of her room and came towards us. All I wanted to do was just blurt it out so I could finish what I was saying, but he deserved to have my news delivered differently than that. So I just turned to Annie and when I saw the fear on her face, I was alert—Annie was what mattered right then.

"Sam's gone." She told us.

I felt my heart break. "Gone? What do you mean gone?"

"I mean he took off." Annie replied slowly. "I mean he took off and I don't think he's coming back."

**Note: Next chapter has Kate back because Sam is gone…so obviously Kate is going to come back because they are perfect, lol. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	17. Marry Me

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay, this is one of my FAVORITE chapters so…I hope you guys like it too and yes, it has a cliffhanger, but I bet you all know what that cliffhanger is.**

**Also, do _not_ insult my readers—it pisses me off _a lot_.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Sam had been missing for a little over a week now and I still hadn't talked to Dean about anything because we had one objective and one objective only—get Sam back. Besides, Kate, Annie, Dean and I were really freaking out at this point, though I think I was much more hysterical than the three of them…Dean being his older brother or no. We had tried calling Sam over and over, and we even tried calling Jen and Ellen, but no one knew anything. Even so, Dean tried calling Ellen again, hoping that she had some more news because we were all starting to lose face, Annie at home trying to work from there, me not leaving Dean's side and Kate sticking with Dean while trying to get Sam back.

She wouldn't admit it out loud, but having Sam missing was making her start to change her mind about things. While normally Kate would take this as a sign that she was so attached that she should run, nothing was more important to her than getting Sam back and making sure that he was safe. It was part of why Annie had backed off and stayed with Jen in Kansas while we took leads and went out because Kate was very particularly about how and when we did things because she wanted Sam back.

Kate Newman just wanted Sam Winchester.

"Ellen, it's me again. Any chance you've heard from him? I swear it's like looking for Dad all over again. I'm losing my mind." Dean told her as Kate tried calling Jen and I tried calling Sam again. "I've called him a thousand times! It's nothing but voicemail. I don't know where he went or why. Sam's just gone. Hold on."

I looked up when I heard him say that, and he was staring at his phone—it looked like he was excited for a moment. I mean the excitement wasn't all over his face, but it was that glint of hope in his eyes, and I watched him switch the call over and hurriedly put the phone up to his ear and I held my breath for a moment.

"Sammy? Where the Hell are you? Are you okay?" Dean asked and I felt like I could breathe again—thank _God_ Sam had called.

Kate nodded as I did. "Thank God."

"Calm down, where are you? All right, we're on our way." Dean told him, hanging up the phone and then turning to glancing at Kate and I as he made his way to the driver's seat. "Get in the car."

Kate and I obeyed and got into the car, Dean driving rather fast to get to this motel that Sam was at. We were all worried, but Dean was traveling faster than all of us as we hurried inside and started looking for the room number, and when Dean found it, he started knocking on the door frantically.

"Sam? Sam it's me," Dean said, but when no one opened the door, he opened it himself and we walked in to see Sam sitting on the bed, completely and utterly confused, sad and blank, so Dean approached him cautiously. "Hey."

"Hey, Dean," Sam replied without out looking up.

Dean knelt by him. "Are you bleeding?"

"I tried to wash it off." Sam told him as Kate went to sit next to him on the motel bed and I stayed near the door, Kate stroking his hair and kissing his temple tenderly, relieved.

"Oh my God," Dean said, looking him over and seeing blood on his shirt.

Sam swallowed before speaking again. "I don't think it's my blood."

Sam had been missing for a whole _week_ and what? He just suddenly didn't remember _anything_? How was that even possible? Something was going on here, but I was too worried about Sam to focus and I didn't want to—I just wanted Sam to be all right, I just…I just wanted Sam.

"Whose is it?" I asked calmly.

"I don't know," he answered me.

Dean looked up at him. "Sam, what the Hell happened?"

"Dean…I don't remember anything." Sam said sadly.

"We can go and check at the front desk for you." Kate offered as Dean and I stood there not quite knowing how to take this.

Sam nodded at her. "Please."

xx

**Kate's POV**

When I sent Lana a look, she and Dean left the room, but I stayed there and as soon as they shut the door behind them I bit my lip and looked directly at him. Maybe if I just asked him in my calm, 'Kate' way he would talk to me about this…maybe? It was definitely worth a try and I was freaking out on the inside…I needed this to work out…I needed Sam to be all right.

"Sammy…" I began, but I trailed off.

"I—I don't know what happened, Katie." He assured me.

I sat on the bed next to him and I held him to me, kissing his head and closing my eyes, feeling him against me. I didn't like seeing Sam like this, and I knew that something was terribly wrong but I couldn't voice it. I just had to sit there with him and let him know that I was there…that I wasn't going anywhere.

"Its okay, Sammy…it's going to be okay." I told him, running my fingers through his hair and then kissing the top of his head again. "I'm never going to let anything happen to you ever again, you hear me? I promise."

He pulled away a little and I placed my hands on his face, smiling as best I could and stroking his cheeks with my fingers. I just needed him to understand that I wasn't going to let him be hurt—he was my family, and I was going to take care of him. As much as that thought scared me, I knew that he meant so much to me and I had to be right here with him. Before I could say anything else though, he kissed me, and at first I was surprised, but then I kissed him back, crushing my lips against his before I pulled back.

"Sammy, as great a 'hello' as that is and I want to help you and take that hurt away, I can't do it like this…it would be taking advantage." I told him calmly, wishing he was kissing me again instead.

"Sorry," he told me, looking down at the bed. "I just—I don't know what came over me…and I'm sorry."

I nodded, kissing him swiftly and then stroking his hair, wondering what was going on in his head because I wanted to know. Something was off and wrong—that's what my 'hunter' senses were telling me anyway, and I opened my mouth to say something, but Sam cut me off and I closed my mouth. In fact, I was pretty sure that he felt a bit rejected and that hadn't been my intention at all.

"I think I need to change." Sam said suddenly.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…sure."

"I'll take a shower." He told me, and went into the bathroom, leaving me there to open my laptop and e-mail Kat and Kalli—things were weirder and weirder by the moment.

I e-mailed Kat last and then lay on the bed, Sam sitting down next to me after his shower in silence until Dean and Lana came back, and told him he had checked in three days ago and everyone thought the room was rather quiet. Then we went outside and found a car with a bloody knife and cigarettes in it, trying to figure out what was going on. Sam didn't smoke…and what was with the bloody knife? Nothing was adding up…and we needed to know _why_.

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Look at this, a gas receipt from three towns over." Sam said, and we all got into the car and went to the gas station.

"You, get out of here," the man said, and threatened to call the police since Sam had apparently been in the station and had thrown a bottle at him, completely drunk, and stolen some cigarettes and taken off.

Dean looked at us. "Guys, go wait in the car."

"But Dean," Sam protested.

"Now," Dean said again.

Kate, Sam and I nodded and went out and talked by the car before Dean came out and told us that we needed to go on the highway. We headed out the direction the man in the station had pointed out to us, and then Sam had us go down a road towards a house because it seemed sort of familiar to him. When we got there, we found a man that was dead and lying in his own blood, and when Sam used Dean's lock pick on the closet, we found weapons…meaning he was a hunter…and there was a security camera in there—it would hold our answers.

We watched the security tape, and on it we found evidence…evidence of Sam killing the man and I didn't know what to think of it. As the Sam on the tape actually killed the hunter I didn't know, I had to look away…that just couldn't have been _my_ Sam. Sam wouldn't do something like this. Nothing was right—nothing at all. Sam didn't even feel right. He didn't smell right. Something about him was off but I didn't know what.

"How do you erase this, huh? Sam, come on, I need your help." Dean told him as Sam read a letter to himself.

I stood up. "I need air. Kate, help Dean erase the tape."

I walked out of the room, knowing I should be helping Sam, but also wishing I could figure out what was going on here. I'd known this guy for almost two years now, and I hated seeing Sam like this—seeing Dean like this. Everything was getting messed up and I'd dragged Kate into it all. What the Hell kind of cousin _was_ I?

"Please pick up, Jen." I told the phone as I pressed '1' on my speed-dial.

"Hello, Lan." Jen answered.

I took a deep breath. "Hi, Jenny."

"What's wrong?" She asked me, her whole demeanor changed when she picked up on my sad tone.

I bit my lip. "Sammy killed a hunter, Jen."

"What?" Jen asked, and I could tell she was even _more_ alert now. "That doesn't sound like Sam…not the Sam _we_ know, anyway."

"No, it really doesn't, but we saw the tape, he had blood on him and—this isn't how I wanted to find him." I told her finally.

In fact nothing that I wanted seemed to be happening right now—nothing was going how _I_ wanted it to go. I had wanted to tell Dean that I wanted to marry him, and I hadn't wanted Sam to go missing in the first place. But since he had, I had wanted to find him and have things be normal…_obviously_ that was _far_ too much to ask for. Now what was I going to do? I just wanted my somewhat happy family back…and quick.

"It can't be Sam, Lan…it just can't be. You have to look at other options." Jen told me hurriedly.

"What else am I supposed to look at Jen? The demon has plans for Sam…maybe these are those plans." I said, knowing I didn't believe that, but not knowing what else to think. "Annie snapped a bit too, but she could at least remember doing it—maybe this is just the beginning of it all."

Jen made a noise. "Lan, I know you don't believe that. Call me back when you have more news, all right? I'm going to go spend time with my Dad today."

"Yeah, all right." I nodded slowly. "I love all of you."

"And _we_ love _you_." Jen assured me. "Take care of yourself and Kate and the boys, all right? I'm taking care of Annie, but she seems to want to go and be with Kat."

I nodded and smiled a little. "Yeah, I will take care of them and let her. Annie deserves to get to be with someone close to her age. Bye, Jenny."

"Bye, Lanni." She replied, and hung up.

I slowly pulled the phone from my ear and looked at it as I flipped the top shut, turning when I heard a noise. Kate came out with a look on her face, and immediately came over to me. If she had something on her mind I sure as Hell wasn't going to stop her from saying it…we needed to figure this thing out and if she had _any_ ideas as to _why_ Sam was acting the way he was, I was all ears.

"I don't think Sam is Sam." Kate told me without beating around the bush. "He doesn't feel right to me. Normally his aura is so much more…peaceful."

"I know what you mean." I replied, nodding. "But what could it be? Do you think that the demon is calling out to him? Using him?"

Annie shook her head. "I think he's possessed."

I thought about that for a moment—he _could_ be possessed, it was certainly possible. He still felt familiar even though he didn't feel entirely like Sam…so honestly it fit because that just meant he was alive and a demon was using his flesh. What would be the point in that though? Possessing Sam? Why?

"We should look into that, then." I told her.

Kate nodded quickly. "And soon."

"We're ready to go." Dean told us as he and Sam came out of the door.

xx

"All right, we get a couple hours' sleep and then we put this place in our rearview mirror. I know it's bad, okay?" Dean told Sam as we got back into the motel room. "You got to snap out of it. Sam…say something."

"Just get some sleep and leave in the morning?" Sam asked him. "Murder, Dean. That's what I did."

"Maybe, okay?" Dean said as Sam scoffed. "We don't kn—Shapeshifter."

Sam gave him a look. "Oh come on. You know it's not. You saw the tape: there were no eye flares, no distortions."

"But it wasn't you, all right?" I told him suddenly, and I knew I was raising my voice but I didn't care. "It wasn't you, Sammy!"

"I mean it was you, but it wasn't _you_." Dean explained to him.

I knew that he was trying to lighten the situation a little, but I shot him a look anyway because I _knew_ the tone of voice that Sam was using. He was giving up, and that _also_ wasn't like him—he fought against his so called destiny more than the rest of us did so what the Hell was going on?

"Well I think it was," Sam said, sitting down on one of the motel beds. "I think maybe more than you know."

"Sam…" Kate began, but trailed off.

Dean gave Sam a focused look. "What the Hell does that mean?"

"For the last few weeks I've been having…I've been having these feelings." Sam explained to him.

"What feelings?" I asked, Dean and me sitting on the other motel bed as Kate sat on the bed next to him.

Sam suddenly looked upset. "Rage…Hate. And I can't stop it. It just gets worse. Day by day it just gets worse."

"You never told me this." Dean told him.

"I didn't want to scare you." Sam admitted to him.

"Well bang-up job on that." Dean told him, getting up.

Sam looked up at Dean. "Dean, the Yellow-Eyed Demon—you know he has plans for me. We all know that he's turned other children into killers before too."

"No one can control you, but you." Dean said forcefully.

"It sure doesn't feel like that, Dean. It just feels like no matter what I do, slowly but surely I'm becoming—" Sam was saying.

"—what?" Kate interrupted him.

"Who I'm meant to be," Sam said, and Dean scoffed, packing some stuff into his bag. "I mean you said it once yourself, Dean. I gotta face up to who I am."

This was getting ridiculous and I knew I wasn't the only one who thought so, but it seemed like I was the only one losing it with tears. They weren't even tears because I was really sad…they were tears of frustration and I knew now wasn't the time to lose it like this but what choice did I have? My family was being ripped apart at the seams and there was nothing I could do about it.

"I didn't mean this!" Dean cried, desperate to find something else to talk about.

"But it's true, you know that! Dad knew it too!" Sam told him, getting up as I put my face in my hands and Kate grabbed a granola bar out of her bag. "That's why he told you if it ever came to this—"

"—shut-up, Sam." Dean interrupted him firmly.

"Dean, you promised him." Sam told him and then he gave Dean a look. "You promised me."

"No. Listen to me. We're going to figure this out, okay?" Dean told him as I stood up and ran my fingers through my hair exasperatedly. "I mean, there's gotta be a way, right?"

"Yeah, there is." Sam said, handing Dean the gun. "I don't want to hurt anyone else. I don't want to hurt you."

I shook my head and my voice came out shaky…soft. "Sam, stop this."

"You won't. Whatever this is…you can fight it." Dean pleaded with him.

"No, I can't. Not forever. Here. You gotta do it." Sam said, cocking it for him and looking at him as he looked at the gun. "Lan and Kate won't…and you promised me, Dean…_you_ gotta do it."

I couldn't believe that this was happening, and even when Kate started to protest because she couldn't lose him, Sam and Dean just shared that intense moment. Kate was so focused on this and I was wondering if this was going to happen to my sister and if I was going to have to be in this position. I could _never_ kill Annie…just like I knew that promise or no promise, Dean wasn't about to kill Sam.

"You know, I've tried so hard to keep you safe." Dean told him, and they looked at each other—the looks were breaking my heart.

"I know," Sam told him, tearing up a little.

We all stood there just looking at each other for a moment or two and then everyone's eyes were on me when I reached out and took Sam's hand. This couldn't be the answer…there had to be another way…but what? How did Kate and I figure out if Sam was possessed without letting the demon potentially inside of Sam know?

"You don't have to do this." I told Sam slowly.

"Yes I do," he said nodding, and looked at Dean, who looked at him.

"I can't." Dean admitted brokenly. "I'd rather die."

Dean put the gun down and walked past Sam, shaking his head and I closed my eyes for a moment in relief—thank you. I knew Dean wouldn't be able to do it, but at the same time, the waiting for him to pull the trigger was driving us _all_ nuts and we knew it.

"No…you'll live." Sam said, picking up the gun, and we all looked at him. "You'll live to regret this."

Then he smashed Dean in the face, causing him to fall over, and he knocked Kate out when she ran to him, and then he pointed the gun at me. I knew then that this wasn't Sam—he was _definitely_ possessed…but again why? I couldn't come up with a motive here, no matter _how_ I tried to wrap my head around it.

"Don't follow me," he said, and then he grinned an evil grin and knocked me out too.

xx

I woke up to loud knocking and Kate cursing and I rubbed my head a little. Dean had just gotten up off of the floor, and Kate was flexing her hands, and I knew what was going to happen to Sam next time we saw him—she was going to hurt him. There was a huge emotional storm raging inside of her and I knew that somehow or another, angry, 'I actually have strong feelings for you too' sex was going to occur.

"Are you all right?" I asked Kate slowly.

She nodded quickly. "I'm fine, but Sam won't be when I see him next."

"He's obviously possessed." I told her.

"I don't care if he's possessed—he knocked me out and made me care about him way too much." Kate replied shaking her head.

"I need to use your computer." Dean told the landlord as he explained he'd have to charge us extra since it was 12:30—past check-out.

He gave Dean a look as I looked up. "Now why would I let you use my computer?"

I sat up as Dean gave him some money, and we all went downstairs with our stuff and Dean logged onto the computer and got on the phone. We needed to track Sam via his cell phone, and figure out where the Hell he had gone. Since he was possessed, that meant that the demon was going after hunters…so which one was next?

"Hi. Yeah, I'm sorry to bother you, but my son, uh, snuck out of the house last night to go to an, um, Justin Timberlake concert." Dean explained, and Kate laughed a little. "What?"

Kate shook her head and I just smiled and ran my hand along Dean's thigh because we all needed to be calm. He came up with the first thing that had come to his mind and all we were doing was tracking Sam. If this was how we did it then so be it—wait…why was that look crossing over Dean's face?

"Yeah…Justin is quite the triple threat." He said, and rolled his eyes a bit as Kate and I laughed. "Uh, anyway, he's not back yet, and I'm starting to worry. Right, yeah, boys will be boys. Yes, but, you see, Sammy's a diabetic, and if he doesn't get his insulin I don't—I don't—I just have to find him. Please, I'm begging you."

I took the phone from him. "Hello? This is Sammy's mother. Maybe my husband isn't making it clear that this is a life or death situation. Now I'd really appreciate it if you told us what we needed to know…unless you want me to talk to your supervisor."

"No, ma'am, are you on the website?" The man asked as Dean rested his hand on my side.

"We're on the website right now. I just need to activate the GPS in his cell phone." I replied, and typed in the password he gave me. "Right there, Duluth, Minnesota."

"That's a long way to go for a concert." The man said.

I nodded and smiled a little. "Yes, that is a long way to go for a concert. We appreciate your help. Thank you very much."

"You're welcome." The man replied merrily.

"Have a good day." I said before hanging up.

I looked at Dean and he smirked at me, and I shrugged and gave him a 'what' look because I didn't know what the look was for. I had handled it correctly, hadn't I? Why was he chuckling?

"Wow, you're good at that." Dean told me with pride in his voice.

I blushed and shrugged. "It comes naturally."

"Hey, isn't that where Jo is?" Kate asked us, pulling our focus from each other and turning it on her. "I mean…I'm a fantastic hunter, okay? I also know what Jo and Ellen mean to you, Lanni, even if Jo's not your favorite, and this is…what if he hurts her?"

"Before we go, we need to get some holy water." I told her, narrowing my eyes at her a bit and trying _not_ to look at Dean.

"Why exactly don't you like Jo?" Dean asked as we all went to get ourselves a ride to Minnesota. "I thought you were all buddy/buddy, practically sisters…"

Kate shrugged nonchalantly. "Maybe in the down time when Lanni's not jealous of her liking you."

"Kate!" I told her as she just smiled.

It was bad enough that sometimes I felt slightly worried about the way other women looked at Dean—I didn't need him to _know_ that! I mean I knew Kate wasn't going to lie to him when he asked a direct question, but really? Did she have to go into _that much_ detail about it?

"You were jealous of Jo?" Dean asked me, leaning into me and laughing a little. "Aww, my baby's jealous when she doesn't need to be!"

I rolled my eyes and kissed him to shut him up. "The man I love is _real_ mature."

"It just makes you love me more." Dean replied, and kissed me again.

"Yeah, yeah—let's just go stop Sam before he hurts Jo, all right?" Kate asked us.

He nodded, and the three of us hitched a ride to Minnesota, which was honestly easy enough. When we got there, Dean, Kate and I burst in, our guns raised, and found Jo tied to a post, Sam looking very evil and angry. Jo was gagged and she looked pretty worried, and as soon as we got past Sam, we would get to Jo freed.

"Sam!" Dean cried at him.

"I begged you to stop me, Dean!" Sam yelled at him.

Dean looked at him. "Put the knife down, damn-it."

"I told you, I can't fight it! My head feels like it's on fire, all right?" Sam said and he looked kind of pained. "Dean, kill me, or I'm gonna kill her. Please. You'll be doing me a favor. Shoot me. Shoot me!"

We all stood there, waiting, and I lowered my gun first—no…it wasn't going down like this. Sam was possessed and we needed to get the demon out of him and that was all there was to it. This wasn't going to go on any longer.

"No, Sammy. Come on." Dean told him, turning around and starting to walk away.

"What the Hell's wrong with you, Dean?" Sam asked as Kate lowered her gun slowly too and Sam came towards us. "Are you that scared of being alone that you'd rather let Jo die?"

Dean splashed him with Holy Water, and Sam cringed. "That's Holy Water, you demonic son of a bitch!"

Sam's eyes flashed black and then he jumped out of the window, Kate heading for the window first and foremost. I set to untying Jo as Dean followed Kate to the window and Jo looked at us all rather bewildered. They both wanted to just run out after him and I knew that that was _exactly _what was going to happen.

"He was possessed?" Jo asked, taking the gag out of her mouth and Dean turned to her as Kate and I followed him to the window, and then he jumped out of it. "Dean!"

"Dean, get back here!" I called after him. "Damn him! Why does he always do this to me?"

I knew he wanted to save Sam and I did too, but what in God's name was he _thinking_? He just took off after him, and…well Sam was his brother…how could I fault him for that? I couldn't—and there was my answer. This was something that Dean had to do and should the tides be turned and that was Annie instead of Sam, I wouldn't be stopped either.

"You brought Kate with you?" Jo asked me.

I turned to her. "Yeah, I did—she and Sam are involved, so this is personal to her too."

"Yes, it is personal, so it's a good thing that we find Dean and Sam." Kate said as she looked Jo up and down. "He'd never go for her, Lanni."

"What do you mean?" Jo asked as I pocketed the gun and went to the front door of the small saloon.

Kate laughed a little. "Lanni's been a tad jealous of you and your crush on Dean."

"Kate!" I told her harshly, turning to her and giving her a look. "Seriously! Not important right now, okay?"

"What bothers me is that you call yourself a hunter and you didn't know he was possessed…" Kate said shaking her head. "Even after I gave you tips those few times I was in the Roadhouse."

"I didn't realize he was possessed, okay? Not everyone has _your_ talents." Jo said, and looked at me as she grabbed her coat. "You were jealous of me?"

I sighed loudly and looked at the two of them as Kate asked me if Jo was really coming with us and Jo sent her a look. She wasn't trying to be rude, but she was in 'hunter' mode and thought that Jo was just going to get in our way here regardless of the respect they held for each other. The two of them were going to end up killing each other before they ended up _helping_ me, so why take them with me? I could do this on my own—I could find Dean _without_ their help.

"Look, I can do this without either of you." I told them and then rubbed my temples. "But since I can't leave you two here without fear of you two ripping each other apart, you have to promise not to fight or I'll end you—both of you. I'm not playing favorites here."

They realized that I wasn't kidding, and that I was on edge, and just nodded and followed me out of the saloon. I tried calling Dean's phone while Kate and Jo called him by name out on the docks and then I heard it—his ringtone for me. I hurried in the direction of it faster than the other two, their footsteps pounding behind me, and I went over to him near the water.

"Where's Sam?" Dean asked us.

I took a breath. "We were looking for you, honestly."

I reached down to help him up, shooting Jo a look when she tried to help me, Kate getting in between us. I could help Dean up all on my own and even though they had helped, Jo and Kate had bickered a little and I was at my rope's end. We all went back to the saloon and I made Dean take his jacket off and roll up his sleeve since he was bleeding.

"Jo, do you have…thank you." I told her, smiling a little at her when she handed me the forceps and then handed Dean a bottle of scotch.

"Drink this," she said as he gave her a look.

He nodded and then his eyes rested on me as I looked the wound over. "He shot me."

"Yes, I can see that." I replied, smiling a little and meeting his eyes. "It's going to hurt so I suggest you drink the scotch like Jo told you to."

Dean put on a face like it was going to be nothing, and then when he groaned as I stuck the forceps in, Jo and Kate both told him to stop being a baby simultaneously. I bet you can put together for yourself how _that_ went over with them. Then when I pulled the bullet out Dean made another groan and drank the scotch before looking at me.

"Are you done yet, Baby?" He asked me.

I rolled my eyes. "Getting the bullet out, yes—you need to be bandaged."

"She's right—you can't help Sam if you're bleeding to death." Jo told him and then she took a breath. "So…how did you know he was possessed?"

"I—_I_ didn't. I just knew that it couldn't be him. It was Kate and Lanni who figured it out really." He explained as I bandaged him.

She nodded at him and I glanced at her as I wrapped up his shoulder and then she looked at me and then Dean. It was like she was trying to figure out who to ask the next question to…and she had decided on Dean. With Kate on her case because she was stressed out about Sam and with her now knowing that part of me wanted her as far away from Dean as possible, she felt he was the safest choice.

"Hey, Dean?" She asked him.

He looked at her. "Yeah?"

"I know demons lie, but do they ever tell the truth too?" She asked slowly.

"Yeah, sometimes I guess. Especially if they know it'll mess with your head." He explained to her. "Why do you ask?"

"Nothing. It doesn't matter." She shook her head and changed the subject. "So do you have any idea where he's headed to next?"

"As far as we can tell he's going after the nearest hunter. The closest one we know of is in South Dakota." I told her, hoping we got to Bobby before Sam did.

Jo nodded and looked ready to go as I finished Dean's arm. "Okay, good, you're done patching him up so let's go."

"You're not coming." Dean scoffed at her.

Great, this was just what I needed—more people coming along and getting involved in this…more people looking to get hurt. Jo was like my family too—she and Ellen had accepted me and I couldn't get Jo hurt, or even worse, killed. So no…Jo was _not_ allowed to come with us—I was putting my foot down.

"Hell I'm not. I'm a part of this now." She told him as Kate started towards her and I put my hand in front of her to stop her.

"I can't say it more plain than this—you try and follow me, I'm going to tie you right back to that post and leave you here." Dean told her firmly. "This is my fight. I'm not getting your blood on my hands. That's just how it's going to be."

I nodded and squeezed his hand. "I couldn't have said it any plainer myself, Jo. I appreciate you, and I'm _real_ glad you want to help us, but…I can't let you get hurt, okay? Your mother would kill me."

"Wait," she said, grabbing a bottle of some painkillers and handing them out to Dean as we started to leave. "Here. Take these. They'll help with the pain."

"Thanks. I'll call you later, okay?" He told her, and the three of us began to leave as I heard her mutter, "No, you won't."

I felt bad leaving Jo there the way that we were, but at the same time I was glad that she was out of harm's way. Sure she knew where we were going, but after _Dean_ had told her to stay behind, that was that. She wasn't going to upset _him_…what the Hell did it matter what _I_ said in the matter? After all _I_ was the one that cared for her like a sister almost…but whatever…trust the guy she was pining for.

"I can't believe you let him get away." Dean told Kate and I and he sounded angry. "It only took one of you to find me."

I frowned at him. "Yeah, and let you bleed out all over the place."

"Lanni, it wasn't that bad and you know it." Dean said with a sigh. "I know part of you is jealous of the way Jo listens to me more than you—I can tell by the look on your face—and now is _not _the time for jealousy. Sam is _missing_."

"I was worried about _you_." I told him, whirling on him. "I had to make sure _you_ were all right, because believe it or not, I know for a fact you wouldn't shoot Sam, but the thing inside of him would have shot _you_! I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if you had died while we were finding Sam. You know that Sam, though possessed, is fine!"

Dean turned to me as Kate continued walking, and got into the car—she didn't want to be a part of this fight. She was more worried about getting a job done than dealing with everyone's emotions and right now that was a good way to handle it: professionally. I was actually glad for that because I didn't know how much more of this I could handle if she tried to stand up for me.

"Lanni, I didn't…Baby—" he tried after trailing off.

I held up my hand. "Don't. I don't need to take this from you. We all know where he's headed, so just let's get there, all right?"

"Lanni, I know you were worried about me," he said as I walked towards the car and I stopped when he grabbed my hand. "I saw the look on your face when you thought I might be really hurt. I know that you didn't just let him get away, I'm just frustrated."

"I know, but I am too." I told him, keeping my back to him because I couldn't look him in the eye right then. "Everything is going to Hell."

Dean tugged on my hand. "I know. Hey…look at me."

I turned to him and couldn't help but smile sadly as he stroked my hair. I knew he was trying and I was thankful for that because I needed him right then…I needed to _not_ be fighting with him right then and we both knew it.

"Just…I'm sorry," he told me. "I shouldn't have said that about Sam. I'm just—I'm so not in the right frame of mind right now."

I nodded slowly. "I know…me too."

"Let's go and save Bobby, okay?" Dean asked me, and nodded as I did, kissing me softly and letting his lips linger there a moment. "We're going to get through this, Lanni."

xx

As we drove to Bobby's, Kate gave me a look from the back seat and I knew what it was—it was asking if I was alright. I really _wasn't_ all right, and if I didn't speak up soon, Dean was going to be upset with me and I didn't think I could handle that right now. We were patched back up and on edge, and I was gonna lose it the more I thought things over in my head.

"I need you to pull over." I told Dean as I felt my insides twisting. "Please."

Dean glanced at me. "Are you alright?"

"Dean, I know we're in a bit of a time crunch, but if you want to keep the inside of your car free from upchuck, I suggest you pull over." Kate explained, and I nodded.

Dean pulled the car over, and I got out of the passenger seat, going around the car and throwing up in the grass on the side of the road. Dean got out and held my hair for me, and it felt nice for him to run his fingers along my back as I heaved. Everything was so screwed up and the more I thought about the things, the more the _bad_ thoughts were running through my mind.

What if we got to Sam but it was too late? What if whatever was in Sam killed all of us and we couldn't stop it? What if this new family I was part of was suddenly just broken beyond repair? Then the worst thought of all: what if the going got rough and Kate had to do the unthinkable here with Sam?

"You alright?" Dean asked as Kate handed me a napkin to wipe my mouth off with and then held up some gum.

I cried a little, and Dean pulled me to him, Kate resting her hand on my arm as Dean ran his fingers through my hair. Part of me was grossed out with myself for even putting Dean through that just now, but at the same time it was nice that he was here for me. No matter what happened…Dean was _always_ here for me…he was just simply my other half and I was just going to accept it.

"Everything is so screwed up right now." I said into his chest.

Dean nodded and kissed the top of my head. "I know, but I promise that once we get to Bobby's, everything will be all right."

"We can save Sammy, Lanni," Kate added.

I nodded and wiped away my tears, smiling a bit. "Let's go then—I've wasted enough of our time already."

Dean kissed my forehead and then pulled back, me swigging my mouth out with water and spitting out the window once I was back in the car. Then I put some gum in my mouth and we hurried to Bobby's. Once we go there, we saw that Bobby had Sam tied up in a chair, a devil's trap drawn on the ceiling.

"Is he unconscious?" I asked Bobby.

Bobby nodded at me. "I put holy water in his beer and then knocked him out."

"That was ingenious," Kate told him with some respect in her voice.

"Hey!" Dean said, hitting Sam to wake him up.

Sam looked up to see the Solomon ring, and sighed, looking at Dean. His eyes definitely had hollowness to them, and I just wanted Sam back. It wasn't fair that all of this shit happened to _us_…why to _us_? What was the big master plan? What was it?

"Dean. Back from the dead. Getting to be a regular thing for you, isn't it?" Sam mocked him. "Like a cockroach."

Dean smirked a little. "How about I smack that smart-ass right out of your mouth?"

"Careful now. You wouldn't want to bruise this fine packaging." Sam said happily.

"Oh, don't worry. This isn't going to hurt Sam much. You on the other hand…" He said, throwing holy water on him watching as he groaned and then Dean raised his voice. "Feel like talking now?"

"Sam's still my meat puppet." The demon explained, his black eyes shining. "I'll make him bite off his tongue."

I scoffed at that. "You won't be in him, long enough."

"Bobby," Dean told him, and we watched as Bobby began to speak Latin and the demon squirmed. "You see whatever bitch-boy plan you demons have cooking up? You're not getting Sam. You hear me? Cause I'm gonna kill every single last one of you first."

The demon laughed. "You really think this is what this is about? The Master plan? I don't give a rat's ass about the Master Plan."

We were all a little put off by that, but Dean nodded at Bobby, who continued to speak in Latin to exorcise the demon. The problem was, it didn't seem to be working and none of us knew why…why wasn't the black smoke leaving Sam? Another question I hadn't asked yet…how did Sam get possessed in the first place? When did it happen?

"Oops. Doesn't seem to be working. You see, I learned a few new tricks." Sam began to mutter Latin, and the lights flickered.

Dean swallowed but his voice was firm. "This isn't going like I planned."

"What's going on, Bobby?" I asked him.

"It's a binding link." Bobby said, checking Sam's arm. "It's like a lock. It's locked itself inside Sam's body.

"What the Hell do we do?" Dean asked hurriedly.

"I don't know." Bobby admitted, stepping away, and the ring broke, and Sam tossed Bobby, Dean, Kate and I across the room before breaking free.

Bobby hit glass, Kate hit a wall, Dean hit the nearest post, and I hit a bar that was sticking out, and it went through my abdomen. I let out a cry and leaned my head against the wall, biting my lip to stop from whimpering because I could do this. It was just a little bit of pain…just a little, I could handle this…

"You know when people want to describe the worst possible thing…they say it's like Hell?" Sam asked, grabbing Dean by the collar and punching him in the face. "Well there's a reason for that. You see Hell is like, uh…" He punched Dean again. "…well it's like Hell. Even for demons." He said, punching Dean again as I coughed and inhaled sharply. "It's a prison made of flesh and bone and blood and fear." He said, punching him again. "And you sent me back there."

I nodded, knowing now why it felt so familiar and yet not Sam. "Meg."

"Ugly bitch." Dean told her, a little worried I'd coughed the word out but not able to move from his position on the floor because of Sam's body holding him there, Meg controlling his every move.

"No, not anymore. Now I'm Sam." Sam said, punching Dean yet again. "By the way…" He added, gripping the shoulder Dean was shot in and pressing hard. "…I saw your Dad there. He says, 'Howdy'. All I had to hold on to was knowing that I would climb out someday, and torture you, nice and slow, like pulling the wings off an insect. But whatever I do to you, it's nothing compared to what you do to yourself, is it? I can see it in your eyes, Dean. You're worthless. You couldn't save your Dad, and deep down, you know you can't save your brother and little Lana over there is going to leave your sorry ass when you fail them all. They'd be better off without you."

Sam raised his hand to strike Dean one more time, but Bobby grabbed his hand as Kate lifted her head and coughed, conscious again, and Bobby seared the sign off of Sam's arm, the demon leaving him and going out through the fireplace. Sam's body fell to the ground as Kate and Bobby caught their breaths and I cringed. Then Sam began to move around after and he looked around, trying to piece together his surroundings.

"Sammy?" Dean asked from the ground as Bobby helped Kate up and she pulled the bar out of my stomach.

"Did I miss anything?" Sam asked us.

Dean punched Sam really hard and then he leaned on the ground as Bobby stood there with the hot poker. I dropped to my knees as Kate lifted up my shirt a little bit, and frowned, her eyes looking up to meet mine as Dean grunted my name and tried to sit up straighter. The pain in his eyes as he saw me like that was breaking my heart, but he had sworn not to be the reason for my death and he had to know.

"How is she?" Dean asked Kate.

Kate swallowed, her eyes locked on mine. "You need a doctor, Lanni…this is really bad..."

"I'll survive." I told her, smiling a little. "It doesn't hurt as bad as it looks, I'm sure."

"If you want to make sure that bar didn't hit any vital organs, we _have_ to get you to a doctor." Kate explained.

Dean nodded and made his way over to me. "Lanni, listen to her."

I nodded slowly. "Alright, Kate."

"You need help standing?" Kate asked me.

"Yeah." I admitted to her, starting to feel rather dizzy.

Kate helped me to stand and then got me to the car as everything started to spin and I groaned softly. In the time it took us to get to the car, the boys talked to Bobby a little and as they came out, I passed out from the loss of blood.

xx

When I came to, I sighed—it smelled like a hospital. There was the beeping of monitors, and the fresh, sterile scent, and I could hear someone else's breathing. My eyes fluttered open and I smiled at Kate as her face came into focus. Seemed like she was sticking around now that she had Sam back and I wanted her to be around because frankly, we'd be better off with her.

"Hey," I said softly.

"Hey," she looked up from her magazine at the nearby table and smiled, coming over and sitting in the chair next to me. "I called Jen and she said I have to call her back every half hour to tell her how you're doing. She'd come but—"

"—Kevin's working and she's super pregnant with twins. I understand." I told her with a nod.

"I should get Dean." Kate said suddenly. "He's been pacing out there—he was _freaking_, Lanni…I really think that boy loves you more than he lets on."

I smiled at that notion and then reached out and grabbed her hand as she rose to leave. I wanted to see Dean, but I wanted to know how I was first so that when I saw Dean, I could talk to him about other things. Death was a subject I tried to steer clear of with him—I think that choice is for the best.

I smiled a little. "Before you get him, what's the diagnosis?"

"The doctor says that you'll be fine." Kate explained to me. "She says the bar didn't puncture any vital organs and that even though your uterus has healed nicely…you're still not conceiving."

"I kinda figured." I told her with a nod.

Kate kissed my hand. "I'm going to get Dean."

She kissed my forehead before she left, and I closed my eyes as she left, taking a deep breath. I hadn't expected anything to really change, but at the same time hearing the words hurt just as much this time as the first time I'd been in a hospital and someone told them to me. My eyes opened when I heard the door moments later, and Dean came in and sat by my side.

Dean kissed my hand. "The doctor only wanted one person in with you, and I figured that with you and Kate being related by blood—"

"—shut-up." I said lovingly and then I smiled and ran my thumb along his hand as he held mine. "How are you and Sam?"

Dean shrugged. "We're pretty good. I mean Sam is a little unnerved, but we're good."

"Good." I told him, and scooted over a little so that Dean could get on the bed with me.

Last time either of us were this close on a hospital bed, the roles had been reversed and I loved feeling his arms wrap around me. He kissed the top of my head and I snuggled against him, ignoring the slight pain I was feeling. The painkillers were doing wonders but at the same time, the dull pain was there and let me tell you, trying to move around and snuggle people with tubes hooked into you was aggravating.

"The Doctor said that we could check you out today," he told me softly.

I nodded slowly and smiled a little. "That would be nice."

He kissed my head again and his chest heaved. "I hate to see you like this."

"Baby, I'm fine," I said softly, pulling back enough to look into his eyes, "and the painkillers may not be working perfectly, but I'm fine."

Dean nodded, and then the doctor came in, followed by Sam and Kate, and I started to think about the last week. It had been completely nerve-wracking and even somewhat nauseating and I still had yet to tell Dean _any_ of the things that I wanted to tell him. I focused on the doctor though and after one last check-up, I was released and we all went to the closest motel.

"Sam and Kate went to get food?" I asked Dean, trying hard to stay composed.

Dean nodded slowly. "Yeah, but they'll be back soon and might even kick us out to have some sex, though probably not—they don't seem to want to take advantage of that fiasco, but they should. They almost lost each other."

Hearing him say it like that made up my mind. "Dean?"

"Yeah?" He answered.

"I don't want to lose you." I told him softly.

Dean looked me in the eye. "Lanni, you're not going to lose me."

How did he know that? He didn't! If there was _one_ thing the last hunts had taught me, it was that _anything_ could happen and we couldn't let it. I needed him, and I wanted to be _with_ him and he needed to know…this was my chance to explain myself to him. Not to mention he had just said that Sam and Kate had almost lost each other and it was time.

"You don't know that, Dean." I told him softly. "You don't know what the future has in store for us. You don't know how much you mean to me. I want you to understand that you are my world—my rock. Ever since we met, I've had feelings for you even though for a little while I tried to deny it. I fell in love with you _completely_, and I've been here, and I'll always be here, and I know that you will always be here for me too, no matter what happens to us because I know that you love me, even though you don't want to say it all the time."

"Of course I'm going to be there for you and protect you, Lanni…I mean like you said, I love you." Dean told me, and he cocked his head to one side as I bit my lip, both of us standing there close to each other. "Where is this coming from, Lanni?"

"You saw what happened to Sam." I told him, fighting back tears. "That could easily happen to _any_ of us! You said it yourself just not that Sam and Kate almost lost each other, even if that was a slip up of words for you! Demons come into our life and they make our lives Hell! They maim and they kill, and they—"

"—Lanni…" Dean said, and pulled me to him, letting me compose myself again…letting me take deep breaths.

Just inhaling his scent was driving me over the edge and I had to keep going. I was just on overdrive right then and even though I was verbally vomiting all over him, it had to be done, and deep down he knew it too. This was just one more thing that he and I had to do and he had to let me finish my thoughts.

"I don't want to lose you." I repeated, looking up at him, and he wiped my tears away with his thumbs as he cupper my face. "I know this isn't the right time. I know that, and I should have done this a _long_ time ago."

"Done what, Lanni?" Dean asked me, still confused.

"Every moment I spend with you is a moment I cherish forever, Dean. When everything is all said and done all I can say is, 'I love you'." I explained to him with a soft shrug. "No matter what happens, the bad and the good—all I can say is, 'I love you', because I do, with every inch of me. This isn't coming from me because I'm hysterical—I promise you—this is coming from my heart…I love you, and I can't live without you."

"I love you too, Lanni." Dean assured me, taking my hands in his as they rested on his chest.

I nodded, wet my lips, and took a deep breath, looking him in the eye as he looked at me so fondly. I couldn't believe right then that I hadn't done this before, and when he smiled a little and cocked his head once again that was it—that was all I needed. I had all the courage to say the two words that needed to be said, and so I opened my mouth and I let them come out.

"Marry me."

**Note: Now I think you can see why this is my favorite one…and what a cliffhanger! There is definitely more to come and soon, I promise. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	18. A Blessing and a Curse

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**What a mean cliffhanger, right?**

**Well now it's time for a new chapter and it changes POVs a lot.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Dean hadn't said anything to me—not a word. He just stared at me dumb-founded and I knew what he was about to say: 'I can't'. The words were forming, I knew it, and then Kate came running in saying Jen was in the hospital, and Dean just…he seemed so distant now. People talk about how some relationships can end because people rush into things too soon, but I knew that couldn't be true for Dean and I—it just couldn't.

"What happened to Jen?" I asked Kate.

"Well, that's a long story, Lanni." Kate admitted to me. "All Kevin said was that it was a long story and he needed us at the hospital ASAP—and needed someone to come and help him because Annie went to be with my sisters."

I nodded and looked at Sam. "You two up to going to Kansas again? I know it's a lot to ask but—"

"—it's fine, Lan. We're up to it." Sam assured me, and Dean nodded too so we all got into the car.

I couldn't believe that I had gone out on a limb and told Dean to marry me and he wasn't speaking to me now. What was up with that? He loved me, and I loved him and what the Hell was wrong with him? How come _I_ was more invested in this relationship than _he_ was? How was that even fair?

xxxx

**Dean's POV**

I can't even tell you what was running through my mind exactly when the words came out of Lana's mouth. Part of me wanted to just blurt out 'yes'—God part of me wanted that to happen _so_ badly—but I knew I couldn't. This was just one of those things that I _couldn't_ give her and it ripped my heart apart to see that pained look in her eyes, but I just couldn't do this.

When I had first started to fall for her that same voice in the back my head said, "stop this before you get her killed and regret it forever" and I should have _listened_ to that voice. How could she want this? How could she want _me_? I was a womanizing bastard that liked alcohol and the thrills of the hunt—why would she want to be attached to _me_? Why had I given up the fight against this and let her in?

"What happened to Jen?" Lana asked Kate, all attention off of me.

When Kate had come running in telling us something was wrong with Jen part of me felt relieved—part of me felt disappointed. If I wasn't going to give her the answer she wanted than she deserved to hear _why_, right? I mean the woman in front of me had been through all of this with me…she was always by my side…she loved me…and God help me I loved her too…she deserved _so much more than __**me**_.

"Well, that's a long story, Lanni." Kate told Lana with a nod. "All Kevin said was that it was a long story and he needed us at the hospital ASAP—and needed someone to come and help him because Annie went to be with my sisters."

Lana nodded and looked at Sam. "You two up to going to Kansas again? I know it's a lot to ask but—"

"—it's fine, Lan. We're up to it." Sam assured her.

How come she hadn't looked at me? Asked _me_? Had I really fucked things up between us _that_ badly? All I could do was just nod because she seemed to be at least waiting for a reaction of _some kind_ from me, and then she was off, out of the motel room and headed for the car. All I could do was follow her…my feet felt like lead, and my heart was pounding so hard…all I could think about was how much I could _not_ lose her…

xx

**Lana's POV**

"What's with Dean?" Kate whispered, leaning over to me. "He seems really out of sorts.

I sighed loudly and shook my head. "I'll tell you later, okay?"

She nodded, and we all sat in silence for a while until Dean turned on his rock music to calm him down. I leaned into the car seat and closed my eyes because as nice to know as it was that he needed to calm down, _why_ did he need to calm down? What was I _thinking_ proposing to him? Had I just put a wedge between us? For some reason, I felt the need to drink…a lot…I couldn't lose Dean…not now.

"You okay, Dean?" Sam asked, and then looked back at Kate and I. "You okay, Lan?"

"Something's up with them, but I don't know what." Kate told him.

Sam took a deep breath. "You guys want to talk about it?"

"No." Dean and I replied together, and I suddenly felt sick again.

"What happened when we left to get food?" Kate asked us, obviously not relenting here and I knew why. "You guys can tell us anything and if it affects a hunt…"

Dean made an annoyed noise. "Look, I like you and all, Kate—and I love that my brother is so clearly into you—but Lana and I really don't want to talk about it."

I opened my eyes suddenly as the word set in. "You just called me 'Lana'."

"I guess I did," Dean said slowly and his face in the rearview mirror looked kind of sad about it.

I couldn't say anything else to him other than that, and so I shut my mouth and looked out the car window. I _knew_ I'd made a wedge between us now because every dynamic we once had was gone. What had I done? This was all my fault…how did I fix it?

"Well, whatever happened between you two was obviously really big." Sam told us.

"Sam!" Dean warned, raising his voice. "Do _not_ make me push you out of this car!"

I took a shaky breath. "Maybe everything we had was just for nothing."

"Damn-it, Lana!" Dean exclaimed, hitting the steering wheel as he drove. "I'm fucking in love with you! Can't you still see that?"

"Whoa…calm down." Kate told him. "I don't want you to crash this car with me inside."

"If you love me so goddamn much, then why didn't my question at least deserve acknowledgement?" I asked angrily.

I had thought about not going there but I wanted to be heard and I wanted _him_ to be heard if he needed or wanted to be. I mean what I had said was big, and it was life changing and he and I needed to discuss this. Kate and Sam had _no_ idea what was going on, but right now that didn't matter—only Dean and I did.

"Question? What question?" Sam asked very confused.

Kate's eyes widened as Dean and I shut our mouths. "You didn't, Lanni."

"She didn't what?" Sam asked Kate, looking at her after the words came out of her mouth.

"You didn't ask him to marry you…" Kate finished looking directly at me.

Sam and Kate looked at each other and then Dean and I and then it seemed to all make sense to them. I had proposed and Dean had obviously turned me down because we were fighting—we were fighting and it wasn't helping anyone out at all.

"You make it sound like she shouldn't have," Dean muttered.

I scoffed. "Well it's not like it got me anywhere."

"You didn't answer her?" Sam asked Dean, and he sounded rather upset with him.

"Look, I thought we were supposed to be focusing on Jen in the hospital," Dean told us all, desperately wanting to change the subject.

I glanced from the window to Dean. "I can be worried sick about Jen _and_ be pissed at you all at once."

"She deserves an answer, Dean," Sam stressed to him.

"Sam, this is none of your goddamn business," Dean told him firmly.

Kate sighed loudly. "Look, we know it's not our business, but you guys' happiness is Sammy's and my first priority."

"I want to go to the airport," I said firmly. "Drop me off at the airport."

xx

**Dean's POV**

I hadn't _meant_ to call Lana, 'Lana'—it had just slipped out. I couldn't do anything right anymore…that was really what it felt like. Couldn't she understand that I couldn't marry her and just let things go back to normal with us? I mean we were fine—we were perfect—until I realized _what_ she wanted from me.

I mean how could I _do_ that to her? Being married to me meant that all of my burdens were _hers_…that all of my _demons_ were _hers_…I couldn't do that. Lana had enough on her plate without _me_ adding to that. Maybe this was actually better this way…just let her be mad for a while and then try again…try things differently.

"Well, whatever happened between you two was obviously really big," Sam told us.

"Sam!" I warned, raising my voice involuntarily. "Do _not_ make me push you out of this car!"

Lana took a shaky breath. "Maybe everything we had was just for nothing."

"Damn-it, Lana!" I exclaimed, hitting the steering wheel as I drove, letting the words just spill out as they may. "I'm fucking in love with you! Can't you still see that?"

"Whoa…calm down." Kate told me. "I don't want you to crash this car with me inside."

"If you love me so goddamn much, then why didn't my question at least deserve acknowledgement?" Lana asked angrily.

I got why she was angry, I did, but why did we have to keep going over this like this? Of _course_ she deserved acknowledgement but why now? We were supposed to be getting to Jen and this was _mine_ and _Lana's_ personal business—Sam and Kate had no business being in it and that was just that.

"Question? What question?" Sam asked very confused.

Kate's eyes widened as Lana and I shut our mouths. "You didn't, Lanni."

"She didn't what?" Sam asked Kate, looking at her after the words came out of her mouth.

"You didn't ask him to marry you." Kate finished looking directly at Lana.

Sam and Kate looked at each other and then Lana and I and then it seemed to all make sense to them. Lana had proposed to me and they thought I had turned her down because we were fighting—we were fighting and it wasn't helping. Could this _really_ get any worse if it tried?

"You make it sound like she shouldn't have," I muttered.

Lana scoffed. "Well it's not like it got me anywhere."

"You didn't answer her?" Sam asked me, and it annoyed me how upset he was.

"Look, I thought we were supposed to be focusing on Jen in the hospital." I told them all, desperately wanting to change the subject.

Lana glanced from the window to me. "I can be worried sick about Jen _and_ be pissed at you all at once."

"She deserves an answer, Dean," Sam stressed to me.

"Sam, this is none of your goddamn business," I told him firmly.

Kate sighed loudly. "Look, we know it's not our business, but you guys' happiness is Sammy's and my first priority."

"I want to go to the airport," Lana said firmly. "Drop me off at the airport."

The words cut me like a knife and I didn't know how much more of this I could really take…did she want out of my life for good now? Please tell me that wasn't what she wanted now…I couldn't handle that and I knew it.

xx

**Lana's POV**

The words had come out of my mouth before I could stop them and I really didn't know what to do about them. I just couldn't be in the car anymore with all of the tensions running high. Besides, Kate and Sam were trying to force Dean and me to talk to each other and _that_ wasn't going to end well.

"Lanni, you don't have to run from this." Kate told me.

"Kate's right, Lana…stay." Dean said softly.

"You're the Queen of running away, Kate," I told her and then looked at Dean. "Stop calling me 'Lana'."

He seemed angry again. "It's your name, isn't it?"

"Yes it is, but you don't ever call me 'Lana' and I don't want you to start now!" I explained, my voice getting slightly angrier.

"At this moment, I can't do anything right by you, so I might as well stop talking." Dean replied suddenly.

I nodded at him. "I think that's a good idea."

"I am a runner, I admit that, but after what happened I wouldn't want to be anywhere but here with you guys right now," Kate admitted and then looked at Dean and I after she and Sam shared a smile. "Guys…stop acting immature."

"This is really hurting Katie and I," Sam added with a nod. "Can't you two work this out?"

"Right now, our priority is Jen," Dean said finally.

"I couldn't have said it better myself," I agreed, and we were all silent the entire way to the hospital.

It was better that way—with none of us talking, no one would argue, and no one would get threatened. Dean and I had some time to think—and I knew that Sam and Kate did too—and that was good for us. After everything we were going through right now, and Jen being in trouble on top of that, we needed some quiet time. We all needed to get our wits about us, and when we got to the hospital, Kevin had this look on her face and I kissed him on the cheek before I looked him the eye.

"What happened?" I asked him.

"Actually, that's the thing—I have no idea what happened." Kevin explained to me. "I came home from work and she was lying on the floor, and she was bruised. The doctors say she has a broken rib, and she's in a coma and…I've got daughters, Lanni."

I bit my lip to keep the tears at bay because Kevin didn't need this—he had to be strong for his daughters. That's when it hit me: Jen had to have surgery and now there were babies and Kevin said they were good. They were early, but they were healthy and they would be good, so I walked into Jen's room, trying very hard not to cry, but I was going to and I knew it. I took her hand and I kissed it, pausing when I heard footsteps enter the hospital room, hoping it was Dean but knowing that it wasn't—I knew what Dean's presence felt like and this wasn't Dean…it was Lance.

"Oh! If I had known you were going to be here, I would have brought you coffee." Lance told me, knowing it was me.

I turned around and looked at him. "What are you doing here?"

"Kevin called Karl and me, and we rushed over when we heard the news." Lance replied with a nod.

"Oh," I told him, and I smiled because it was nice to know he cared about Jen. "Well thank you for caring, Lance."

"No problem. We were all friends in High School," he said, and he smiled.

I nodded slowly and turned back to Jen, closing my eyes when I felt it—Dean coming. He entered the room and I glanced over at them, Lance smiling at him and holding out his hand. Dean just kind of looked at his hand and then looked up at Lance, Lance keeping his hand out just to annoy Dean and as hot as it should have been…it just wasn't and I wasn't in the mood for this.

"Who is this?" Dean asked coming into the room.

I sighed and shook my head. "Now is not the time, Dean."

"Oh, so this is the boyfriend," Lance smirked and then looked him over. "Thought he'd be more impressive."

"Wow…let's move this outside, all right?" I asked, shoving them both out into the hall.

Dean looked Lance in the eye. "You really don't want to mess with me today."

"I dunno, I think I could take you." Lance replied with a shrug.

"Lance, really, now is not the time." I told him.

Dean looked at him with new hatred. "Oh, so this is the ex-boyfriend?"

I couldn't stop what happened next—Dean was still so angry that he took his anger out on Lance, punching him hard in the face. When Lance recovered, he sung at Dean, his fist making contact with Dean's jaw, and then Sam and Kate got between them, Kate staring Dean down. Jen was in the hospital and they were _fighting_? What the Hell?

"You know what? You need to calm down," Kate told him.

"Why should _I_ calm down?" Dean asked her, looking at Lance who held up his hands in surrender as Sam gave him a look.

"Because you're in a hospital, Moron," Kate told him and when Dean held his hands up too, Kate let go of his jacket.

"I'm out of here," Dean told us, and looked at Kate, avoiding me. "Call me if there's any change—I want updates."

Kate nodded slowly. "Yeah…"

"Damn-it, Lance. Why now of all times?" I asked angrily.

I took off out of the hospital, knowing I should be by Jen's side and spend some time with my Goddaughters, but I would come back. I went to a bar really close to the hospital and I ordered several drinks, knowing I probably shouldn't, but at this point I didn't know what else to do. Dean hadn't answered me…_still_. He said he was in love with me, sure, but now he was just mad at everything and everyone…including me.

"Hit me again," I told the bartender, setting down my mug.

"Slow down, Lan. I know how you get when you get super drunk." Lance said and I groaned—way to find me then of all times.

xx

**Dean's POV**

Normally when things were this bad, Jen would talk to me about what I was doing wrong—about what I needed to do to keep Lana. Jen couldn't do that right now and so I _wanted_ to be in the hospital but that would be awkward wouldn't it? I was friends with her sure, _and_ with Kevin…but that would just be weird.

I thought about going to a bar, but when I got drunk I got stupid and I couldn't have another waitress incident. So I just drove around for a little while and then went to pick up Sam and Kate, the three of us heading to Lana's house. After the whole incident with me having to borrow Jen's key to get in, Lana had one made for each of us and now we were in the house…and she wasn't there.

"Dean?" Sam asked me.

I ran my hand down my face as I stood at the doorway of Lana's bedroom. "Yeah?"

"I know technically it's none of my business but this is one of the things I was talking about before, Dean…this affects all of us." Sam explained slowly.

"I can't marry her, Sammy." I told him, nodding slowly. "I can't be what she wants me to be…I'm not good for her…I'm not good enough _for_ her."

Sam took a deep breath. "I think you are."

"How can you say that, Sam?" I asked him, turning to face him. "She's beautiful, and she's independent, and she was innocent before I _ruined_ her! I'm going to get her killed! I mean look at the times she's been in the hospital—the times I've had to watch her bleed or pass out!"

"Stop beating yourself up for _finally_ loving someone this much, Dean." Sam told me, and I swear he was feeling sorry for me. "Stop beating yourself up for _finally_ finding a reason to have a semblance of a normal life."

"We're _not_ normal, Sam!" I exclaimed and then I just shook my head and turned back around, looking into the room. "This is all my fault…I led her on."

_Jen and I weren't **entirely** friends, but she had a habit of showing up and making me think things through. She was also **incredibly** protective of Lana so I knew when she walked into the room that a talk was going to ensue. Lana was in the other room talking to Sam and it was just me and Jen…no buffer._

"_You need to let her know you're not going to leave her ass when a finer piece of one comes around." Jen told me without beating around the bush._

_I nodded at her. "Forward…I'm glad."_

"_Stop trying to be cute because **I** don't think you're cute." Jen explained to me with a shrug. "Now the way I see it, you like her and she likes you, but she needs to know that you won't just run out on her."_

"_Lanni **does** know that," I protested._

_Jen shook her head. "Just get her a promise ring Dean. I know it seems 'chick flicky' and kind of 'lame' but it's not—it'll get through to her and save you getting dumped on your ass…so it's win-win, don't you think?"_

_I just chuckled a little and decided to nod because it sounded like it was a good enough idea. I mean I **didn't **want to be dumped on my ass so maybe I should take Jen's advice to heart. Besides, when someone lays it all out for you like that, how do you walk away from it? You don't…you just listen to them and heed the order._

"I never should have given her that promise ring," I told Sam, shaking my head again. "I made her believe that I was capable of commitment and I'm not—damn Jen for telling me to do it!"

Sam shook his head too. "Dean, you _are_ capable of commitment—Hell, Lan is the _longest_ and most _meaningful_ relationship that you have _ever_ had…and come on, you wouldn't want that relationship to end, would you?"

I thought about that—Sam was right. I had _never_ been with a woman as long as I had been with Lana and I had never felt this way about another woman before. Lana had broken through every barrier I'd ever had and I'd let it happen…so I had _wanted_ this. I couldn't deny any of that though—I wanted the relationship and most importantly, I wanted _her_…so how could I just let her walk away like this?

Sam nodded and left the room when I stopped talking, sure that he had gotten through to me, and I knew that there was only one thing left to do—wait for Lana to come home. If I tried to call her right now she would just ignore my call, so I got ready for bed and crawled into our bed…that was what Lana always affectionately called it and I never corrected her. Problem was…Lana didn't come home that night and I knew that wasn't a good sign.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I woke up the next morning and I remembered nothing—and I mean _very_ little…I had been drunker the night before than I had the first time I'd gotten super drunk with Dean. My head hurt _really_ badly and I felt a familiar presence near me—an unwanted presence…oh great…I sucked at life.

"Oh God, please no," I whispered softly.

When I turned over to see Lance just sitting there beside me though, I felt better about myself—especially when I saw that I was still clothed. So there had been no drunken sex or anything, I just crashed here drunk and Lance had let me be…but he was watching me sleep and that was creepy. I sat up and looked at him, tears in my eyes because I didn't really know what to say or do here and I felt kind of sick to my stomach.

"So…did I make a pass at you?" I asked him slowly.

Lance shook his head. "No, you didn't—you basically cried about Dean and kept telling me about how you couldn't call him."

"Then I stayed here?" I asked nodding.

"Yeah…you said you couldn't go home and so I let you stay here," Lance told me with a sad smile. "I've missed you a lot and it was nice to have you here—if even for a little while."

I nodded at that and then I sighed, looking around when I heard my phone ringing and then I found it and looked at the cover: Kate. Of course she was calling, because she was probably worried, and so I picked up the phone and I put it up to my ear. Since I hadn't come home the night before, everyone was probably wondering where I was and at least I didn't have to say that I had had drunk sex with my ex—even drunk, that just wasn't who I was and I was happy about that.

"Hey, Katie," I answered with a smile.

"Where the Hell are you?" Kate asked me.

I sighed softly. "I'm out. What's wrong?"

"The doctors say Jen has to wake up today," Kate explained to me, my heart hurting. "Dean checked over the house and found some sulfur, so we think it's a demon infection—only not like the Croatoan thing, Sammy says."

"Damn," I said, rubbing my sore eyes.

"What's up?" Lance asked me.

I took a shaky breath. "Sulfur, demon infection, Jen is dying and we have to stop it now."

"Was that…Lance?" Kate asked cautiously in a whisper.

I didn't know how she was going to take me telling her that it was in fact Lance, but I wasn't going to lie about it either. Nothing had happened and perhaps if they needed something supernatural done, then Lance could help them as he knew some of what to do since he and I had been together in High School. Apparently we had ended up drinking and talked about High School and about our dabbles in Dark Magic and then we ended up at his place and I had a meltdown about Dean.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…yeah it's Lance."

"Lanni, what the Hell are you doing with him? You just proposed to Dean." Kate protested and she was disappointed in me—not as disappointed as I was in myself. "I know I'm not one to talk, but I just…what happened?"

"We didn't do anything—just talked, I had a meltdown about Dean, and then I stayed here." I explained to her. "I'll be right there."

Kate sighed loudly. "Fine…just hurry, all right?"

I nodded and hung up the phone, closing my eyes and taking a deep breath before I got up and started to make myself more presentable in the bathroom. One thing I certainly didn't want was to show up at the hospital looking completely disheveled and gross and so I got my hair brushed and straightened out my clothes from the night before as Lance got me coffee. He seemed genuine enough right now and I was a little bit thankful for him and his chivalry.

"How's Dean going to take this?" Lance asked me. "He kind of hates me just because I'm your ex, which I guess is a good sign."

I shook my head and shrugged. "I, uh…I really don't know…I kinda proposed to him yesterday."

"So you're engaged now?" Lance asked me. "You left that out of your ranting."

I couldn't tell what that tone was in his voice but I knew it wasn't disgust…it was just something in the question that seemed to make me feel a little guilty talking about this with him. He was just curious and wanted to know the answer and I didn't really have one for him…I stopped and tried to find the right words, but some just spilled out of my mouth. It was just like me after all, to verbally vomit all over people.

"Not exactly," I admitted to him.

Lance nodded slowly. "Oh, so you want to be with the man that won't even marry you?"

"Please don't say that like you know what makes me happy, Lance—I _know _that tone in your voice, all right?" I told him, shaking my head. "You don't know what makes me happy…not anymore. You used to, and I get that we have kind of a sad history, but I think you know from last night that Dean is who occupies my heart and test or not, Lance, I don't appreciate you insinuating otherwise."

"I know that, Lan-Bon. We've _both _changed a _lot _and I just…it's a lot to take in." Lance admitted to me.

I nodded because I knew that was true—Lance had proposed to _me _at graduation and I had turned him down. Everything had changed after my parents had been murdered, and had they not been…maybe things had been different for us…now we'd never know. Now he was hearing that _I _had proposed to someone else and gotten rejected just as he had and he wasn't rubbing it in my face—he _knew _how badly it hurt and he was just asking questions about it.

"Um…we'll talk later." I told him as I grabbed my coat.

He just nodded and I headed outside, cringing at the sunlight and what it was doing to my eyeballs. I toughed it through though, and got to the hospital all right, getting some more coffee and going to Jen's floor. Sam was right there waiting and he looked me over, making a face and I started to panic—did he know? Had Kate told him because she was trying to prove to Sam that he was in her circle and she wanted to be with him?

"Wow…what happened to you?" Sam asked me.

I sipped my coffee, knowing my hair was fixed since I'd done that, and looked down at myself—the buttons were buttoned and the fly was zipped. Okay, so he _couldn't_ assume anything bad had happened, but I was in the same outfit I had worn the day before and if he knew I had been at Lance's because Kate had told him, then he would assume this was my walk of shame. God, I probably smelt like ass on top of it all.

"You look super tired," Sam told me, reaching out and stroking my hair. "Were you drunk?"

"Lana wouldn't get drunk," Dean told him from behind me, but when he looked at me, he raised an eyebrow. "You went and got drunk last night?"

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…yeah, I did. So Kate said something about sulfur and a demon infection—do we have any new leads by any chance?"

"Sam thinks that it's a demon virus, Lanni. He thinks that Jen was infected by someone close to her, and I know who it is." Kate told me, joining the group.

"Who?" I asked her.

She took a deep breath. "Michael."

"What?" I said, thoroughly caught off guard.

She nodded and kept speaking. "But the problem is I'm going to have to summon him to us. He took off after visiting Jen yesterday and it's suspicious behavior—something is really off about him."

"Michael as in old buddy, Michael?" I asked her.

"Come on, Lanni—wrap your head around it." Kate teased lovingly. "Sam and I know how to do the spell, and so we figured we'd leave you and Dean at the house to come up with some back-up plans and get the house ready for Jen's return, Kevin will stay here with Jen, and then Sam and I will go to the old warehouse and summon him."

I wasn't really glad that Sam and Kate were trying to throw Dean and me together to ready a house for the arrival of children, but at the same time I needed to talk to him. Our relationship—if we were still going to _have_ one after this—wouldn't work if I wasn't honest with him…if we weren't honest with each _other_. So…I just nodded even though Dean was shaking his head and it was breaking my heart.

"No," Dean said still shaking his head. "I'm tired of being left out of the spells."

"You know Ancient Greek?" Sam asked him.

"No…" Dean admitted after a pause.

Sam nodded decidedly. "Then you're of no use to us, and you're spending the time with Lan and that's final."

Dean sent him a look, but he and I went back to Jen's house in silence and we went inside, me setting to work cleaning things a bit so Kevin wouldn't have to when Jen got here with him. Kevin needed to be by Jen's side—he _wanted_ to be there not because he was her husband, but because he _loved_ her. Now that Dean and I were there, he didn't have to worry about anything but being with the woman that he loved.

Even though it started with silence, Dean ended up turning to me. "You look like crap."

"Oh how I've missed the loving boyfriend banter," I said sarcastically and then I looked at him. "You do too."

I went into the living room and sat on the couch, looking at the coffee table as I heard a sigh. Soon Dean was sitting on the couch across from me and I couldn't bring myself to look him in the eye. I'd just ruined things between us even more and I wondered if we should even _be_ together…this was getting to be _far_ too hard.

"What happened to you last night?" He asked me slowly.

I avoided his eyes. "Things you won't like when I tell you."

"Oh really?" He asked and I knew he was raising his eyebrows.

"Okay, what I have to say is important and I need you to wait until I'm done speaking, all right?" I asked him, looking up and meeting his eyes.

He nodded at me. "Did you do drugs? Do you have an STD?"

I glared at him. "Dean, this is serious!"

"And those were both serious questions." He replied.

"Well if I _did_ have an STD, I would have gotten it from you," I told him with a soft laugh.

He nodded slowly. "Touché."

I didn't really like where the conversation had headed because Dean had almost effectively avoided it by making jokes. It was his mechanism and I knew that but what I had to say _had_ to be said. Besides, I was helping the joking along because it was part of how we flirted, so maybe that was a good sign instead of a bad one.

"Last night I went out and got myself really drunk because I'm really hurt that you never answered my proposal…that you rejected it." I explained to him. "Lance showed up, we got drunk together, and I stayed with him last night. Nothing happened, but I'm sorry…I'm sorry that I ended up running to him about our problems."

Dean nodded slowly and swallowed. "I forgive you."

"What?" I asked him.

"Come on, Lana—this isn't you and we both know it. Nothing like this _ever_ would have happened had I never taken advantage of you the first time." Dean explained to me and then he shrugged. "Besides, nothing happened, right? Maybe after what I almost did with that waitress, we're even…"

"Relationships shouldn't be about what makes us _even_," I told him, giving him a look and swallowing. "I'm sorry…this is all my fault."

Dean sighed loudly as I got up off of the couch and he followed me into the kitchen, watching me as I started to make coffee. We were both silent for a long while, both of us just standing there and avoiding eye contact. What had happened to us? We were fine until I jumped in and ruined all of it…maybe we _should_ just quit now.

"Look, Lana, I'm sorry that me not calling you 'Lanni' lately is getting to you, and I'm sorry that I haven't given you an answer yet, but I am still processing." Dean told me finally as I poured myself a cup of coffee and looked at the island counter. "I've never been in a relationship this deep before. I mean I've never felt like putting a guy on the ground for just _looking_ at a woman I'm involved with! I've never—God I've never felt this many feelings before all at once over a _woman_! I'm not just saying things when I say I'm in love with you—I really am in love with you! I mean yeah, I don't like throwing the word out there, but you know who I am and it's that alone that makes me wonder why you want me in the first place! I'm not worth it!"

"Of course you are!" I told him, looking at him as the tears came to my eyes. "Stop feeling bad for yourself and think about it this way: what kind of woman am I to fall in love with the man that you think you are that 'doesn't deserve me'?"

Dean sighed and looked at the counter. "I just…Lana, I don't think I can give you what you want and it's killing me, all right? I'm not the settling down type."

"I didn't _ask_ you to settle down, Dean. I asked you to _marry_ me. We'd still be hunting, I'd just be your wife instead of your girlfriend—it's a change of title." I said and then I just shook my head and sighed at the silence coming from him. "You know what? You can just forget I asked you in the first place."

"I don't _want_ to forget it." Dean admitted to me. "I just…I just need time, all right?"

I nodded slowly. "Alright…"

xx

Sam and Kate had summoned Michael, but he had gotten away and everyone was on edge about it. Dean kept saying that he should have gone with them to beat Michael's ass, and I just took all the information in. Kate and I worked really hard to find another way, and Kate had found the antidote, so we snuck it to Jen, who woke up and looked at us all from the hospital bed.

"What happened?" She asked us. "I—how are the babies? Please tell me I didn't lose them!"

I took her hand in mine and kissed it. "You are the mother of two healthy baby girls."

"You know it would be girls," Jen teased and then looked at Kate. "So…"

"Michael infected you with a demon virus—he wanted to see how witches like us would react—he works for the demon." Kate explained to her. "We actually have to go and talk to Jo about it since she figured it all out when I did."

Kate sounded really angry about it, and I wasn't too thrilled myself after how things had been left. I knew I had nothing to worry about, and Kate was just upset because she liked to figure these things out all on her own, but I thought of Jo _like_ my sister so the anger was ridiculous. Jo and Kate just didn't seem to be getting along right now…and I was thinking maybe they just needed to duke it out…and if that happened I wasn't going to stop them honestly.

Jen nodded slowly, the information sinking in. "Wow. Well it's nice to see you all."

I smiled and sat down next to her. "It's good to see you too, Jenny."

We talked to Jen for a bit before we went to Minnesota to see Jo, who didn't like that Kate and I were there again and I would have rather been with Jen, Kevin and my new Goddaughters, Kaydence and Minah respectively. Besides, Jo and Kate were getting on my nerves and I was about to lock them both in a cage and sell tickets to the match—my money was on Kate even though I hated that Jo might potentially get hurt there. Kate and I had made Dean and Sam stay in the car, and Jo frowned.

"You brought her back," Jo told me. "I mean normally I wouldn't mind, but last time didn't exactly end so well."

I sighed loudly. "Jo…"

"Just shut-up," Kate said, stepping in for herself. "I was going to own up and thank you for helping to figure out what this whole demon virus was, but now you've really pissed me off. I don't like getting help, it puts me in a bad mood, and when you take it personal, it just makes me angry."

"Kate…" I began, but she held up a hand to silence me.

Jo scoffed at her. "Well it's not like you've been very nice to me as of late."

Kate flexed her fingers as Jo came out from behind the counter. "I've had a lot on my mind, so how about you just focus on this and not deal with what I said last time, okay? Maybe even check your attitude at the door and stop pining over my cousin's boyfriend right in front of her face."

Jo nodded slowly. "I respect Lana, but honestly as far as I can see, though he's in love with her and neither of you have anything to worry about because he's been taken hook, line and sinker, Lana doesn't own Dean."

I knew she was just doing that to piss Kate off because Jo knew she didn't stand a chance and she _didn't _want to encroach on my territory, but it drove Kate over the edge. Kate slugged Jo in the face, knocking her down on the ground and I stood there with my mouth gaping open—that was fast. Honestly, I was hoping that we'd all start to reign in the anger since they were actually talking things out…I was wrong.

"Kate!" I reprimanded and though I had at first said I wouldn't get in the middle, I realized I didn't want _either_ of them to hurt so much.

"Damn that felt good," Kate told me.

I sighed and held out my hand for Jo to take it, but she got up on her own and punched Kate back, the force enough to make Kate's head move, but Kate was quick to hit her back. The two of them started to throw punches and at first I was stunned—they weren't fighting like immature little girls, they were slugging it out. Then when what was happening kicked in, I knew I had to do something to stop this.

"STOP!" I roared getting in between them.

Jo stared Kate down. "Who the Hell do you think you are, coming in here and hitting me? This is _my_ place!"

"I'm your worst nightmare," Kate replied, shaking her head. "You should know better than to push my buttons, Harvelle."

"All right, that's it," I said, pushing Kate out the door.

"I don't want to see her again," Jo told me, standing up and cringing.

I nodded at her. "I'm sorry, Jo—I really am. Hey…thanks for looking into this demon virus thing. You have any more information?"

"I know it's being perfected. I heard about the spray that Gordon had, and well…if Jen had even had another microgram of that stuff, she'd be dead." Jo explained to me.

"Then I guess I have to watch myself." I told her and then I looked at her, both of us making eye contact. "And take care of _yourself_, all right?"

Jo paused but she nodded, and I left the saloon and grabbed Kate by the arm, dragging her to the car. They needed to get all of their hostility out, but I felt responsible—Kate felt like she was defending me and I was flattered, but this was wrong to do it like this just because I was feeling so defeated. I wanted her and Jo to get along…I couldn't handle anymore of this and I knew it.

"Whoa, what's going on?" Sam asked us when he saw Kate's face, cupping it lovingly and looking her over.

"I haul-ass punched Jo in her stupid face," Kate replied with a shrug. "She's fine she just seriously got on my nerves and I'll apologize when I'm feelings less angry, I promise. I don't actually have anything against her, I'm just seriously stressed out—we all are."

With that said, Kate got into the car and Sam shook his head, but smiled at the same time—Kate's spunk was one of the many amazing qualities she had that made her so loveable. I mean Sam didn't want them to fight, but the fact that Kate was so nonchalant about it like Dean just kind of seemed to spark his interest even more and I smiled a little.

"And you just let it all happen?" Dean asked me suddenly.

"I'm not as quick as Kate," I told him, shrugging. "I got Kate out of the place and then talked to Jo peacefully. It's not like this meeting was planned so Kate could goad her and have a go."

"Let's just go," he told me angrily, and I frowned.

"Right now I feel like I don't even know you," I whispered to myself.

**Note: There's some drama, but things will lighten up in a bit, I promise. Next chapter has some Kate/Sam too, and some more Lana/Dean trying to figure things out. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	19. Tall Tales and Answers

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**So here is the next chapter! Not only does it shift POVs a lot, but Kate's POV is the only one that's the truth. Tensions are high and she's the voice of reason for a little bit, which has been fun to write.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

I wasn't talking to Dean. He and I were having a terrible disagreement about absolutely everything. Tensions were running high between us all, especially since this last case we were on was making us all stumped and antsy. None of us were happy with the others except I was happy with Sam and Kate, and Kate was happy with me. She was sitting on Dean's and my bed playing spider solitaire while I lay on the other side of the bed playing Bejeweled on my phone.

"Dude…you mind not eating those on my bed?" Sam asked Dean as he researched using books.

Dean reached down and grabbed some more of the food, putting it in his mouth. "No, I don't mind…how's the research going?"

I looked at him as he read his stupid tabloid magazine and wanted to say something, but changed my mind and looked back at my game. We had a pretty nice record of silent treatment and I thought that it should last just a little while longer. It was childish, but the two of us were having a communication problem and I didn't know what to do about it.

"You know how it's going? Slow." Sam answered, slamming the book shut. "You know how it would go a heck of a lot faster? If I had my computer…"

Dean sent him a look with a little smile, and then I sighed—I _hated_ it when they were at each other's throats. Still, I wasn't talking to Dean, so when he looked at me and gave me a look, I knew I wasn't going to answer him, and he knew it too but he tried anyway. I had to give him that—at least right now he was _trying_.

"What?" Dean asked me but when I ignored him, he sighed too, going back to his magazine.

"Kate has her computer, and she won't even let me use it!" Sam said exasperatedly.

"You know I don't like people touching my stuff—especially when there's a chance you'll let Dean touch it and screw it up—and it's not like I'm finding anything either." Kate said testily. "So stop bothering me about it!"

"Could you turn that down?" Sam asked Dean about the radio, trying to concentrate.

"Yeah, absolutely," Dean said, turning it up, making Kate and I turned to each other.

"You know what? Maybe uh, maybe you should just go somewhere for a while, huh?" Sam said over the music, and I threw a shoe at Dean.

Dean turned off the music. "Hey, I'd love to. That's a great idea. Unfortunately, my car is all screwed to Hell."

"Dean, I told you, I have nothing to do w—" Sam began, but a knock on the door stopped him.

We all looked at each other and then after a pause Kate spoke up and told Sam to get the 'goddamn door'. He sighed loudly at her and then got up, opening up the door to Bobby standing there. The boys had called him in for a consult because the boys were stumped…Kate and I had it figured out but we were waiting for them to get it on their own—served them right.

"Hey, Bobby," Sam greeted him.

"Hey boys," Bobby told them and then nodded at us. "Girls…"

"Hey, Bobby," Dean told him slightly happier than before.

Kate and I kept playing our games but chorused, "Hi, Bobby."

Bobby came inside. "It's good to see you again so soon."

"Yeah, uh, thanks for coming." Sam replied.

"The boys have this whole case screwed to Hell," I said, and Dean smacked my leg lightly.

I made a face and Bobby swallowed—he knew he had walked into something he'd much rather walk _out_ on, but he was staying. He was as loyal as they came and since the boys had asked him for help, he was going to see this through and I truly loved him for that. There was no one like Bobby Singer in the whole world and the boys and Kate and I needed him and his guidance.

Sam motioned to the room. "Come on in."

"Thank God _you're_ here," Dean told him, shaking his hand.

"Yeah, I mean spending another hour alone with them wouldn't prove mutually beneficial for anyone." Kate explained. "Lana and I are pretty close to shanking them both."

"So, um, what is it you didn't want to talk to me on the phone about?" Bobby asked us.

"It's this job we're working." Sam chuckled. "We weren't sure you'd believe us."

"Well I can believe a lot." Bobby assured us.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's just that we've never seen anything like this before." Sam explained to him.

"Not even close." Dean added.

Yeah, _that_ was for sure. We needed to lay all of the facts out there on the table for Bobby and Kate and I were _more_ than willing to do that. Sam and Dean were _both_ getting on our nerves—well Sammy was never _really_ on mine—and we wanted this hunt to just be over and done with. Right now we all needed a breather from each other, but it was important to get this case finished too.

Kate nodded slowly. "We thought we could use some fresh eyes."

"Well, why don't you begin at the beginning?" Bobby asked us.

"Yeah, all right…please," Sam offered Bobby a seat at the end of the bed that Kate and I were sitting on and Bobby found some of Dean's food and made a face.

"Dean's a slob," I said, and looked up as he sent me a look. "I'll take it, but still."

There was a slight smile on Dean's face when he heard the last words that had come out of my mouth and I had to smile just a little too. It wasn't like he didn't still have the greatest shot in the world with me, it was just that I was mad and so was he, and we needed to communicate better. Still, this job took precedent and so we needed to make it the first priority.

"So…it all started when we caught word of an obit. You see, this professor took a swan dive from a fourth story window, only there's a legend that the building is haunted." Sam explained to him.

xx

**Sam's Side of the Story**

"Yeah, we both had the professor for 'Ethics and Morality'," this jock said, drinking some beer.

"So why do you think he did it?" I asked as Kate and Lana stood around listening.

"Who knows? He was tenured, had a wife and kid," the girl said. "His book is like a really huge deal. Then again, who's to say it was suicide?"

The guy looked at her. "Jen, come on."

It was a little weird that another girl was named 'Jen', but I wasn't letting it get in the way of my job. Dean was off doing God knew what, or hitting on God knew who since he and Lana were in a row, and Kate and Lana weren't really working. They were standing off in a corner talking to each other.

"What else _could_ it be?" I asked them.

Jen leaned forward. "Well you know about Crawford Hall, right?"

"No, I don't actually," I told her, interested.

"It's a bunch of crap. It's a total urban legend," the guy said.

"Well Heather's mom went to school here and she knew the girl." Jen protested.

I raised my eyebrows. "Wait, what girl?"

Jen looked at me. "Like, 30 years ago, this girl was having an affair with her professor, he broke it off, and she jumped out the window and killed herself."

"You know her name?" I asked her.

This was definitely the kind of information that I needed—the kind of information that could turn this whole hunt around. It was just kind of annoying that I was doing this all by myself…I would have liked to have some help.

"No," she answered, "but they say she jumped from room 669. Get it? Turn the nine upside down…" The jock chuckled. "So now she haunts the building and anyone who sees her…they don't live to tell the tale."

"Well, if no one lives to tell the tale, then how does the tale get told?" The guy asked.

Jen looked over at him. "Curtis, shut-up!"

"You know what? Uh, thanks a lot guys. Excuse me." I told them and Kate and Lana followed him over to the bar, where Dean was taking shots of something. "Dean. What are you—what are you drinking?"

"I don't know man. I think they're called purple nurples," Dean replied, chuckling a little.

What the Hell did he think he was doing? He had a girlfriend and he was over here taking shots while she hung out with her cousin? Dean really needed to get his head out of his ass and stop pretending like he was supposed to be alone forever. Sooner or later he was going to have to realize that he had a good thing going for him and pushing her away might push her away forever.

I nodded at him. "Well listen, I think maybe we should check out the professor's office."

"Oh, no, no, no. I can't right now because I've got a feisty little wildcat on the hook. I'm about to—ZZ!—reel her in." Dean chuckled. "Let me introduce you."

"D—" Kate began, but Dean turned around.

"Starla. Hey, Starla. This is my copilot Major Tom, and his sisters. Don't worry, he'd be the only one coming with us." Dean explained to her. "Major Tom—Starla."

The blonde chuckled drunkenly. "Enchante," she told him, hanging on Dean.

"Hi," Sam said, and Kate gave a flick of her wrist.

"Wow, and you'd think he couldn't snag anything lower than that demon chick he almost made a pact with—or that vampire even." Lana muttered under her breath.

I sighed a little because I _knew _this was going to hurt Lana but did she have to say it loud enough for everyone to hear? Starla started to back up a little, her hand to her mouth, and we all looked at her—never mind…she was _far_ too drunk to even care.

"Sorry," she said, smiling, "just trying to hold down my liquor."

"Yeah…good job," Dean smiled, turning to Sam. "Listen, she's got a sister."

Starla hung on him again, and they smiled at us.

xx

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold on a minute." Dean intervened.

Sam looked at him. "What?"

"Come on dude, that's not how it happened." Dean protested to him.

"No?" Sam asked him with a scoffing laugh. "So…you never drank a purple nurple?"

"Well, maybe that, but I don't say things like 'Fiesty little Wildcat' and her name wasn't Starla." Dean told Sam firmly. "I certainly wasn't trying to pick her up, I have Lanni."

"Then what was her name?" Sam asked him, Kate and I waiting for the answer too.

Dean paused and made a face. "I don't know, but she was a classy chick. She was a grad student, Anthropology and Folklore. We were talking about local ghost stories."

xx

**Dean's Side of the Story**

I looked at the blonde I was talking to, both of us holding our shots of purple nurples up and looking at each other. She was definitely attractive—better then the kind of skanks that you could pick up in a bar normally. This one was definitely classy, and I needed information out of her, but that was it because I had Lanni.

"Here's to—" she said.

"—here's to us," I replied, and we clinked glasses and took a drink.

"My God, you are attractive," she told me.

I nodded a little at that and a lot of thoughts ran through my mind—I was _trying_ to solve a case here. I didn't need her hitting on me like this but at the same time it would work in my favor…I _was_ after all an attractive scoundrel and Lana needed to know that.

"Thanks," I said, all debonair and suave-like, "but there's no time for that now. You need to tell me about this urban legend. Please. Lives are at stake."

"Sorry, I just—I can't even concentrate," she explained to me. "It's like staring…into the sun."

She slowly pulled me to her, her fingers running along my neck, and we kissed, only to be interrupted by Kate, Sam and Lana coming up behind us. Sam with his jacket over his shoulder, carrying a gay sort of aire about him, and Kate and Lana looking incredibly annoyed with me. What? I was working here. Sometimes we just took one for the team…

"Dean, what do you think you're doing?" Sam asked, pursing his lips and giving me a look.

"Sam, please," I said, wiping off my lip with my thumb calmly. "If you wouldn't mind giving me five more minutes…"

Lana scoffed at that. "With your little slut?"

"Dean, this is a very serious investigation." Sam cut in. "We don't have time for any of your blah blah blah blah. Blah blah-blah blah. Blah blah-blah-blah blah!"

I went back to kissing the girl while Sam continued because I had her right where I wanted her—she'd fold like a cheap suit.

"Blah blah blah," Sam said, getting annoyed. "Blah!"

xx

"And _that's_ how it really happened?" Sam asked angrily as Dean shrugged. "I don't sound like that, Dean."

Dean answered immediately. "That's what you sound like to me."

"And I didn't call her a slut," I put in. "That's not how it went down."

"Oh really? Then how did it?" Dean asked me, giving me a look.

"Well first of all," I began shutting my phone, "Kate and I weren't just standing around doing nothing."

Kate sighed loudly. "Yeah, give me some credit, Boyfriend—I'm a seasoned hunter."

xx

**Lana's Side of the Story**

"I don't know about this legend this girl is talking about," Kate said as we listened to this other Jen talk about room 669.

I nodded at her. "Maybe our best hope is to go and look at the professor's office."

"Well that always _is_ our best hope, Lanni," Kate smiled and then she took a breath. "You okay?"

"I could use something to drink, but you know how alcohol and I are." I told her with a shrug.

Kate nodded slowly. "You're not friends."

I shook my head. "Not after the last drunken incident."

Kate understood that and I was thankful for that—honestly I didn't know how I'd get through this if Kate wasn't here with me. Dean and I weren't speaking because he was trying to prove to me that he wasn't the great guy I thought he was and it was getting ridiculous. Maybe if he pulled his head out of his ass long enough, he'd realize he was worth loving but whatever—I was letting him have this.

"Well, if no one lives to tell the tale, then how does the tale get told?" The guy asked.

"Curtis, shut-up!" Jen told him.

"You know what? Uh, thanks a lot guys. Excuse me." Sam told them and Kate and I followed him over to the bar, where Dean was taking shots of something.

"What the Hell is he doing?" Sam asked Kate and me.

I shrugged and shook my head. "Beats me, but a girl is involved."

"Hey guys," Dean said a blonde hanging on him.

He was trying to make me jealous and I knew that, and it was working. Who did he think he was? He was _my_ boyfriend and he was spending time drinking and hanging out with some bar skank instead of doing _his job_. It really made me think twice about quitting what we had to be honest.

"Hi," Sam told him. "Dean, what do you think you're doing?"

"We're just having a little fun." Dean replied.

"Yes, and we all know where fun takes you." I told him.

"And who are you all?" The girl asked.

"Well, _I'm_ his girlfriend." I said, stepping towards him a little more. "And _you_ are?"

"I'm Hannah. I'm a grad student," she explained her arm still over Dean's shoulder like it hadn't mattered to her what I had _just_ said.

"Wow, and you'd think he couldn't snag anything lower than that demon chick he almost made a pact with—or that vampire even." I muttered under my breath, turning to Sam, and Kate hauled over and punched the girl in the face.

xx

"Wow, you three don't know how to tell the truth do you?" Kate asked, shutting her laptop. "This is getting ridiculous. I did not punch her in the face."

I sighed loudly. "All right, all right—that's true…I just wished you had."

"I told you she was classy," Dean told Sam.

"Classy, no, grad student, yes," I corrected him.

He looked at me. "You didn't care _that_ much."

"Guys! Shut-up!" Kate said. "This is what really happened, Bobby."

xx

**Kate's Side of the Story (and the truth)**

Lana and I were standing near Sam, listening to the conversation he was having with the jock and the girl, swaying a bit to the music to look inconspicuous. It was just another hunt and we were spending the time observing, letting Sam take the lead on the questions this time.

"Yeah, we both had the professor for 'Ethics and Morality'," this jock said, drinking some beer.

"So why do you think he did it?" Sam asked as Lana and I stood around listening.

"Who knows? He was tenured, had a wife and kid," the girl said. "His book is like a really huge deal. Then again, who's to say it was suicide?"

The jock looked at his friend. "Jen, come on."

"What else _could_ it be?" Sam asked them.

"Well you know about Crawford Hall, right?" Jen asked him.

"No, I don't actually," Sam told her, interested.

"It's a bunch of crap. It's a total urban legend," the jock said.

"Well Heather's mom went to school here and she knew the girl." Jen protested earnestly.

Sam raised his eyebrows. "Wait, what girl?"

Jen looked at Sam. "Like, 30 years ago, this girl was having an affair with her professor, he broke it off, and she jumped out the window and killed herself."

"You know her name?" Sam asked her.

"No," she answered, "but they say she jumped from room 669. Get it? Turn the nine upside down…"

That was pretty much where she lost me—no way in _Hell_ a building has _that_ many floors. She was just telling us some legend that had nothing to do with anything and now we were back at square one—great.

"I don't know about this legend this girl is talking about," I said as we listened to Jen talk about room 669.

Lana nodded at me. "Maybe our best hope is to go and look at the professor's office."

"Well that always _is_ our best hope, Lanni," I smiled at her and then I took a deep breath. "You okay?"

"I could use something to drink, but you know how alcohol and I are." Lana told me.

I nodded slowly. "You're not friends."

Lana shook her head. "Not after the last drunken incident."

"Curtis, shut-up!" Jen told him.

"You know what? Uh, thanks a lot guys. Excuse me," Sam told them and Lana and I followed him over to the bar, overhearing Dean's and the blonde's conversation.

"Here's to—" she said.

"—here's to us." Dean replied, and they clinked glasses and took a drink.

"My God, you are attractive," she told him once she'd drunk the shot down with ease—she'd obviously done this before.

"Thanks," he said, trying to be all debonaire and suave-like—it wasn't working for him. "But there's no time for that now. You need to tell me about this urban legend. Please. Lives are at stake."

"Sorry, I just—I can't even concentrate," she explained. "It's like…wow you're pretty."

She reached up and stroked his neck, pulling him in for a kiss and I felt the whole room go tense. Lana was _pissed _and at the same time she seemed like she was handling it rather well given the circumstances as it was a job and this was an edge and if it was switched she'd kiss the attractive dude for intel. I could have punched Dean in the face right then, but we were in a public place, and I could always make his life Hell later.

"Wow, and you'd think he couldn't snag anything lower than that demon chick he almost made a pact with—or that vampire even." Lana muttered under her breath. "She doesn't even know how to strings three words together coherently."

"Dean, what do you think you're doing?" Sam asked him, and he pulled away from the blonde, turning to see us, and smiling as she draped her arm over his shoulder.

Dean shrugged at him. "We're just having a little fun."

"Yes, and we all know where fun takes you." Lana told him.

"And who are you all?" The girl asked.

"Well, _I'm_ his girlfriend." Lana said, stepping towards him a little more. "And _you_ are?"

"I'm Hannah. I'm a grad student," she explained her arm still over Dean's shoulder like she hadn't heard what Lana said—did the bitch _want_ to get cut?

Lana nodded and smiled menacingly. "Yes, well I would like it very much if you would unhand my boyfriend and walk your little skinny ass over somewhere else."

"We all have work to do—go hit on someone else," I added, staring her down until she left.

xx

Bobby looked at us all. "Um…what is going on with you four?"

"Nothing," Sam told him, shaking his head. "It's nothing."

"Especially you two—they're stories were pretty damn compatible." Bobby explained, pointing between Kate and me. "Come on. You're bickering like an old married couple."

"No, see, married couples can get divorced," Dean explained to him.

I nodded at that. "And people who are dating can break up."

"Me and Him? We're like, uh, Siamese twins." Dean told Bobby, getting up to go over to the kitchen area.

"It's 'conjoined' twins!" Sam protested.

Dean nodded and sighed. "See what I mean?"

"Look, it's—we've just been on the road too long. Tight quarters, and all that. Don't worry about it." Sam told Bobby.

"Okay," Bobby answered with a small nod.

I knew he didn't _quite_ believe us, but he believed us enough and that was what mattered right now. Still, if Kate hadn't opened her mouth and gotten back at the subject that was _actually_ tearing us all apart, we would have been fine. She just wouldn't be Kate if she didn't try and fix everything by spilling everything.

"It's not like anyone's getting hitched or anything," Annie told him and I sighed and flopped back on the bed.

Bobby looked at her. "What? What has that got to do with anything?"

"Oh…well, see…" Dean began, but he trailed off.

"I asked him to marry me," I said with a shrug.

"Wow," Bobby replied nodding. "So I take it he didn't say 'yes'?"

I sat up. "Fact of the matter is Dean doesn't think he deserves be loved _or _happy so _I _get to be miserable too. In fact I told him I would take it back and he said he had to think about it—he's not really thinking about a damn thing."

"Then he got all jiggy with that girl at the bar." Sam said with a nod.

"Yes, but she had gotten drunk and spent the night with her ex before so, all in all I bet Dean was feeling a bit like a second choice as it was her High School sweetheart." Kate said, standing up for Dean which was weird. "Right after they were fighting about him not answering her so I think they both are just kind of…upset."

"Yeah, so um, anyway, we figured it might be a haunting, so we went to go check out the scene of the crime." Sam explained, getting back to the hunt at hand.

xx

**Sam's Side of the Story**

"So, how long have you been working here?" I asked the janitor.

"I've mopped these floors for six years," the janitor answered.

Kate raised an eyebrow. "That's a shitty job."

"There you go guys," the janitor told us, turning on the light to the professor's office and I pulled out my EMF radar. "What the Heck is that for?"

"Just finds the wires in the walls." I assured him.

"Ah. Well," the janitor said, "I'm not sure why you're wiring up this office. It won't do the professor much good."

I looked at him as Kate and Lana kind of stopped listening and started looking around the room. They were being observant while Dean and I talked to the janitor and I didn't mind that. In fact more often than not, them just taking the whole scene in saved our asses and I was more than happy to have them do it.

"Why's that?" Dean asked him.

"He's dead." He replied nonchalantly.

"Oh," I said.

"What happened?" Kate asked as Dean walked away from us.

"He went out that window, right there," the janitor explained, pointing to it.

I thought about that a moment and realized that this hunt was definitely interesting and I was kind of glad we had it. There were so many pieces to the puzzle and as long as the four of us could find it in us to focus, this would be a piece of cake.

"Yeah?" I asked, intrigued. "Were you working that night?"

The janitor nodded. "I was the one that found him."

"Did you see what happened?" Lana asked him.

"Nope. I just saw him come up here and…" he began.

"What?" I asked as Dean dipped into the candy.

"He wasn't alone," the janitor replied.

"Who was he with?" Dean asked, his cheeks bulging with candy.

xx

"Come on! I had one, maybe two!" Dean protested.

I laughed loudly. "He had four, and Kate and I were getting vibes, remember?"

"Just let me tell the story, okay?" Sam replied.

xx

**Back to Sam's Side of the Story**

"He was with a young lady," he janitor told us, Dean looking satisfied with his bulging cheeks. "I told the cops about her, but I guess they never found her."

"You saw this girl go in, huh? Did you ever see her come out?" I asked, Dean putting more candy in his already stuffed mouth.

The janitor thought about that a moment. "Now that you mention it, no."

"You ever see her before? Around?" Kate asked and Dean put yet _more_ candy in his mouth.

The janitor smirked. "Not her."

"What do you mean?" Dean asked with a full mouth, all of us giving him looks.

"Don't talk with your mouth full." I heard Lana whisper to him.

"I don't mean to cast aspersions on the dead, but, uh, Mr. Morality here? He brought a lot of girls up here." The janitor explained. "He got more ass than a toilet seat."

Dean laughed and hit me playfully as Kate and Lana smiled a bit, not finding it really as funny as Dean did.

xx

"It's not like we didn't laugh, Sam. The guy was funny." Kate protested.

I nodded quickly. "You're telling it almost as if we didn't understand it."

"Hey…" Sam said, and we decided to let him finish.

xx

**Back to Sam's Side of the Story**

"One more thing," I told him slowly. "This building—it only has four stories right?"

"Yeah," the janitor answered.

"So there wouldn't happen to be a room 669?" I asked.

The janitor shook his head. "No. Why do you ask?"

"I'm just curious." I replied with a shrug.

"Thanks," Lana told him in that polite, happy way she always did when we got the information that we needed.

"Sure," he said.

xx

"Well, no traces of EMF, that's for sure," I said as we got back to the motel and taking off my coat as Dean got the two of us beers and Kate grabbed herself a whiskey and Lana some Root Beer—Lana being particular about the drinking these days and Kate always one-upping Dean and I.

"And that room 669 is a load of crap," Dean added setting the toolbox on the table as Kate and Lana sat on the couch.

I took a breath. "So what do you think? The professor's just a jumper? The legend's just a legend?"

"I don't know, maybe uh—that girl the janitor described, that's pretty weird." Dean said, tossing his beer cap on the table.

"Yeah, I'll admit that," Kate said, opening her laptop.

"We ought to check out the history on the building," Dean and Lana said at once.

I smiled a little because they actually did that more than they let on—I just wished that Dean would realize he could have her. She had let him all the way and he'd even done the same with her and I just knew they fit…why couldn't Dean see it?

xx

"Get back to the story, Sam," Dean told him and I avoided looking at anyone.

Sam sighed loudly. "Yeah…fine."

xx

"See if any coed ganked herself there," Dean added.

"Yeah, you're right," I told him, getting my laptop and opening it up as Dean went into another room. "Dude, were you on my computer?"

Dean poked his head out. "No."

"Yeah, cause _that_ sounds convincing." Kate told him. "If you touched mine too, you're a dead man, Winchester."

"Oh really? Cause it's frozen now. On—on ." I told him angrily.

Lana sent Dean a look. "Seriously?"

He just kind of stood there looking for something to say and then went back into the other room. It was really getting to me that Dean would just grab what was mine and use as he pleased—besides didn't he have a girlfriend? My brother had some sick habits.

"Dean…would you just—don't touch my stuff anymore, okay?" I asked him as Kate went to check her computer just to make sure hers was fine.

"Why don't you control your OCD?" Dean told me sticking his head out again and I sent him a look and then glanced over at Kate who seemed relieved so her laptop was fine.

Lana shook her head. "Don't even ask."

"Kate? Can I see your computer?" I asked her anyway—what was the harm, right?

"No," Kate said looking at the computer screen. "I don't let anyone touch this."

"She yelled at me last time _I_ did," Lana replied, sipping the root beer.

"I really need to do some research," I told her, hoping that as my girlfriend, she would budge on this type of thing.

I mean surely she could understand _that_ at least. We were on a hunt and I needed to make sure that all of our facts led up. She was one of the best hunters that I knew and right now I just needed her to help me to be as good as she was. Why couldn't she just let me borrow her damn laptop?

"Then unfreeze your computer," Kate replied with a nonchalant shrug. "I can look things up using technology, and you can do it the old fashioned way.

"Kate…please?" I tried again.

"No!" Kate yelled and I took a deep breath and nodded.

xx

"But did you dig up anything about the building? Or the suicidal coed?" Bobby asked as he and the boys moved around, Kate and I going back to our games.

Sam shook his head. "No. History's clean."

"Then it's not a haunting," Bobby said.

"Maybe not. To tell you the truth, we're not really sure." Dean told him.

Bobby looked at them. "What do you mean you're not sure?"

"Well…it's weird." Sam explained slowly.

"What's weird?" Bobby asked them cautiously.

I smiled a little because the next part _had_ been weird, but it was kind of the first thing that tipped Kate and me off. We were _very_ convinced after this that we knew what we were dealing with, but the boys still hadn't gotten to the same page as us yet…but with Bobby's help they'd get there—if they could behave for one damn second.

"This next part, we, uh, we didn't see it happen ourselves exactly, but uh, it's pretty friggin' weird, even for us." Dean told him.

"Curtis, the jock that had been talking to that girl who told us about room 669, was abducted by aliens." Kate explained, playing another game of solitaire.

Bobby looked at all four of us. "Aliens?"

"Yeah," Sam said with a nod.

"Aliens?" Bobby asked again, more forcefully.

"Yeah," Dean told him.

"Look, even if they _are_ real, they're sure as Hell not coming to Earth and swiping people." Bobby explained to us.

Dean nodded. "Hey, believe me, we know."

Aliens—the notion of them was actually kind of awesome to me, but that wasn't the point. The point was that this next part was _damn_ weird and yet so entertaining for me that it made me a rather sick human being. Maybe Dean had been right when he had said that he had stolen my innocence because before, I probably wouldn't be as entertained as I was right now.

"My whole life I've never found evidence of an honest-to-God abduction." Bobby told us. "It's all just cranks and pranks."

"Yeah, that's what we thought, but we figured we'd at least go talk to the guy." Sam said with another shrug.

"Can I take this one?" Kate asked aloud.

Bobby nodded at her. "Absolutely—you're the one that seems to be giving me the truth here."

xx

**Kate's Side of the Story**

We were sitting with Curtis in the bar, and we watched as he had three large shots in front of him, drinking one of them. He was _definitely_ frazzled and it was our job to get the truth out of him—I just hoped we could do it with _some_ kind of tact.

"You ought to give those purple nurples a shot," Dean said with a grin, the he chuckled as Sam cleared his throat and Lana shot him a look.

"What happened, Curtis?" Sam asked him.

Curtis looked up. "You won't believe me. No one does."

"Give us a chance," Lana said, resting her hands near his on the table.

If there was one thing that I'd learned about my cousin in my time reconnecting with her, it was that when she wanted something, she got it. As long as she kept trying to show Curtis that she was on his side and willing to console him, he'd talk—he'd do anything she asked. If she gave him that smile of hers, he'd be putty in her hands—my cousin was _awesome_.

"I do _not_ want this in the papers," Curtis told Sam.

"Off the record," I assured him.

"I, uh, I blacked out and uh…" Curtis began with a small nod. "I lost time, and when I woke up, I don't know where I was."

"Then what?" Sam asked, finally sitting down.

I glanced over at Sam for a second and then I looked back at Curtis who was telling us his story, but with difficulty. The poor jock was _definitely_ scarred and I felt pretty bad for him, but at the same time if I said I wasn't getting a _little_ enjoyment out of his story, I'd be a filthy liar.

"They did tests on me," Curtis replied, his voice cracking. "And, uh…" He took a shot of the second glass, then clearing his throat. "They, uh, they probed me."

Sam had to look away to hide a smile as he scratched his head, and Lana and I looked at him. I was _so_ afraid that I was going to lose it here—aliens and probing…oldest alien story in the book.

"They probed you?" Dean asked him finally.

"Yeah, they probed me. Again, a—and again, and—and again." He said and took the last shot. "And again and again and again and then they probed me one more time."

"Yikes," Dean said his face unbelieving and amazed and disturbed all at once.

Curtis nodded. "And that's not even the worst of it."

"How could it get any worse?" Dean asked him, a smile forming. "Some alien made you his bitch."

That could have been the most insensitive thing that Dean had said all day at that point and when we all looked at him he wiped the ridiculous smile off of his face. Then we looked back at Curtis, who decided that he could continue.

"They…they—they made me…slow dance." Curtis told us.

xx

"You guys are exaggerating again, huh?" Bobby asked.

"No," the four of us answered together.

Bobby nodded quickly. "Well then this frat boy's just nuts."

"We're not so sure," Dean replied.

xx

**Dean's Side of the Story**

"I'm telling you guys, this was made by a jet engine," Sam told us as we looked at the mark outside where Curtis had told us he had been abducted.

"You mean some saucer shaped jet engine?" I asked him skeptically.

Sam shrugged his shoulders. "What else could it be?"

"What the Hell?" I asked him.

"I don't know," Sam said, shaking his head.

"Seriously, dude, what the Hell?" I asked again.

"I don't know!" Sam answered testily.

Lana sighed softly. "First the haunting and now this…"

"The timing alone makes you think it all has to be connected." Kate said, looking hard at the mark on the ground.

"You mean between the angry spirit and the sexed up E.T.? What kind of connection could there possibly be?" I asked her.

xx

"But what could we do? We kept on digging." Dean explained.

xx

**Back to Dean's Side of the Story**

"So you and this Curtis guy, you were in the same house?" Lana asked one of the frat boys we were trying to get information out of—leave it to Lana to turn on that smile and get everything…I kinda missed her even though she was hitting on them for information right in front of my face.

xx

"Just 'kinda'?" I asked him. "And for the record, you kissed a girl in front of me…"

Dean looked at me for the first time in a while. "Just let me finish, please."

xx

"Yeah," the guy answered her, smiling a bit at her.

I nodded at him. "You heard what happened to him, right?"

"Yeah, he said it was aliens, but, you know, whatever," he told us with a shrug, diverting attention back to Lana and that smile.

"Look man, I—I know this all has to be so hard," Sam began, the wind blowing his hair.

"Uh, not so much," the guy replied.

"But I want you to know that I'm here for you. You brave little soldier." Sam told him with a brave face as the guy looked at him funny. "I acknowledge your pain. Come here."

Sam went to wrap the kid in a hug and Kate, Lana and I all looked at each other—wow, really? I mean I knew that Sam was always identifying with the people we talked to, to make them feel safe or something, but what the Hell?

"What the Hell?" Kate asked in a whisper as the boy looked to us for help.

"You're too precious for this world," Sam said, looking at the sky and he squeezed the boy tight.

xx

"I never said that!" Sam protested earnestly

Dean shrugged at him. "You always say pansy stuff like that."

"Boys…come on now." Kate told them as Bobby looked at them funny.

xx

**Back to Dean's Side of the Story**

"Well, um…yeah, uh, thanks. Thanks for the hug, but, uh, I'm okay. Really…" the boy said and Sam nodded and got off him, smiling, and patting his shoulder. "To tell you the truth, whatever happened to Curtis, he had it coming."

"Why's that?" Kate asked him curiously.

"He's our pledge master. He's put us through Hell this semester and he got off on it." He answered. "So now he knows how we feel."

"Mmm," Dean said, and looked at Sam's forlorn face. "It's okay."

xx

"Maybe it's time one of us took over," I told them.

"What?" Dean asked me.

I nodded at him. "Yeah—I think it's time Bobby got a little more truth than fiction."

"I don't mind that," Bobby said. "Go ahead, Lana."

"Well, after we talked to Jimmy, we went back to the motel," I began with a nod.

xx

**Lana's Side of the Story**

"It still doesn't make a lick of sense," Dean said, coming into the room and taking off his jacket as Sam closed the door after Kate and I came in. "At least there's one connection."

"Between what?" Sam asked, going over to the bed.

"The victims," Dean replied, tossing his coat on the floor. "The professor and the frat boy—they were both dicks."

Sam gave him a look. "That's a connection?"

"You got anything better to go on? I'd love to hear it." Dean said as I sat down next to him and laid my head in his lap, smiling as he ran his fingers through my hair.

It didn't matter that we kept fighting, or that we hadn't been speaking to each other—this was something automatic for us. If I was close, Dean made me feel loved and it just proved to me even more that he could do this with me if he just _chose_ to.

"Where's my laptop?" Sam asked as Kate sat on the other bed.

"I don't know," Dean said testily and then he went back to the subject at hand. "I mean think about it. A philandering professor gets a dead girl. A pledge master gets hazed."

"I left it in here," Sam said, searching for it.

"You obviously didn't." Dean told him and then switched gears again. "I mean these punishments—they're almost poetic. Actually, it would be more like a limerick, but still—"

"Okay, hilarious, ha ha." Sam told him. "Where'd you hide it?"

I took a deep breath because here we went again—the two just couldn't stop being at each other's throats. I mean yeah, we were all on edge, but the boys just weren't keeping it together as well as Kate and I were…and Kate was researching—I knew that look on her face. I wondered what she was up to…

"What, your computer?" Dean asked him.

Sam nodded quickly. "Yeah, where'd you hide it?"

"Why would I take your computer?" Dean asked as I turned on my side and placed my face in Dean's stomach.

"No one else could have. We keep the doors locked. We never let any maids in. Lan and Kate wouldn't do it." Sam explained to him. "Hell, look at how protective Kate is over her computer!"

"Looks like you lost it, Poindexter." Dean told him, and it was silent for a moment.

"Damn…here we go again." I heard Kate say, and I heard her laptop lid close.

If there was one thing I'd learned about Kate this whole time, it was that she actually _liked_ watching Sam and Dean fight. It wasn't that she enjoyed their pain or anything, it was just that she was glad they had an outlet because she knew better than anyone how incredibly hard this job was. If they kept it all bottled up, then in the long run it would be much, much worse.

"Dude, you know something? I put up with a lot from you!" Sam yelled at Dean.

"What are you talking about? I'm a joy to be around." Dean protested.

Sam scoffed at that. "Yeah? Your dirty socks in the sink, your food in the fridge!"

"What's wrong with my food?" Dean asked him.

"It's not food anymore, Dean! It's Darwinism!" Sam protested, and Kate laughed and I smiled—_no one_ could argue _that _one.

"I like it," Dean said with a shrug.

Sam was definitely _not_ finished here. "You know all I ask from you, is the one thing—don't mess with my stuff!"

"You done?" Dean asked him.

Sam sighed loudly. "You know, how would you feel if I screwed with the Impala?"

"It'd be the last thing you ever did," Dean replied.

"Can you just, relax, both of you?" I asked them.

"Coming from the girl who's been on edge ever since Minnesota the first time," Dean told me, still upset about everything but for some reason still running his fingers through my hair even when I changed my position so I could look at him.

I glared at him. "You need someone to knock some things into you."

xx

"Did you take his computer?" Bobby asked Dean, all of them at the table now while I sat on the couch and Kate played another solitaire game.

"Serves him right, but no." Dean told him.

"Well I didn't lose it!" Sam protested at him. "'Cause _I_ don't lose things."

Dean looked at him. "Oh, that's right, 'cause he's Mr. Perfect."

"Okay, okay," Bobby said wanting them to stop. "How do you two put up with this?"

God that was an _excellent_ question and though I knew it was because _I_ loved them more than life, I didn't know why _Kate_ put up with them. She didn't have to…then again she did _so_ many things for me…so it was probably just because _I_ did. That, or she honestly liked Sam a lot more than she was letting on and that made me love her so much more…I loved her _so_ much that she didn't even know.

"God, I don't even know," Kate told him, getting up to get something out of the fridge. "Actually, I do…it's Sammy. I think by now that he knows that and hey—who doesn't want to hang out with Lana?"

Sam smiled a little more at her. "Well, I'm glad you're here."

Bobby nodded at her. "Why don't you guys just tell me what happened next?"

"There was one more victim," Dean explained to him.

"Right, now we didn't see this one ourselves, either. We kind of put it together from the evidence, but this guy—he was a research scientist. Animal testing." Sam admitted.

"Yeah, he was a dick," I said making a face. "Poor animals…"

Dean nodded quickly. "And being a dick, he fit the pattern."

I took a breath. "The cops didn't say how de died because they didn't know themselves."

"So we checked it out ourselves," Kate added and I was glad she had taken over story telling again. "Besides, hunting is my expertise, remember?"

xx

**Kate's Side of the Story**

Getting into the morgue was harder than we thought it was going to be, but it had to be done. So we all climbed through a window and we opened up the door in the morgue to the body. Honestly this was my _least_ favorite part about the job—dead things creeped me out…like the dead bodies…body parts…blech. Sometimes I was good with it, but when there wasn't really a body to find, I was less fond of it.

"Well this oughta be quick," Dean said, his flashlight running over the tiny container and he took the sheets off and we all cringed and felt like gagging. "Okay, that is just nasty."

"Uh, yeah," Sam told him, trying not to throw up.

Lana made a face. "Mutilated?"

"Looks to me like something was hungry," I told her, proud that she remembered the police report from before but then again it was Lana—she was always helpful.

"They identify him yet?" Dean asked.

Sam nodded. "Yeah, a research professor…guess where his office was."

"Hmm?" Dean inquired.

"Crawford Hall, just like the professor," Lana answered, glancing at him and then quickly glancing away.

Dean nodded at him. "That's right where the Frat Boy had his close encounter."

"Yeah," I replied with a nod.

Now don't get me wrong, I _adored_ the boys, but Dean was getting on my nerves. It wasn't his idiocrocy either—it was how he hurt Lana without even trying sometimes. If he was so in love with her, why couldn't he let himself be happy? Because in letting himself be miserable, he was making _her_ miserable too.

xx

"Okay—how come every story has something to do with Lana and me?" Dean asked suddenly.

I looked at him. "Because it's what had us all upset _before_ the hunt started but I agree—more hunt, less domestic squabbles."

"Thank you," Dean said kindly, a sad smile on his face. "Kate…continue."

xx

"Hey, uh, grab me that thing right there," Sam told Dean.

Dean looked at what Sam had found. "What is it?"

"It looks like a…a belly scale…" Sam answered slowly.

"Like an alligator?" Lana asked in a tiny voice.

I looked at my cousin—really? I thought she had gotten over this fear _years_ ago…besides it wasn't like the alligator was _here_.

"You still afraid of those things?" I asked her.

She shot me a look. "I was scarred at a very young age. It's called growing pains, a nightmare, and waking up after it eats you and not being able to move because you're in pain."

"An alligator in the sewer—come on…" Dean said reaching over to stroke Lana's hair because he knew she needed it, but he didn't want to acknowledge that by saying it because he was still trying to prove he was an ass she would be better without…it _wasn't_ working right then.

xx

"Kate!" Dean told her.

Kate sighed and nodded. "Fine, okay? Fine."

xx

"Dean, it's a classic urban legend. A kid flushes a baby gator down the toilet and it grows huge in the sewer." Sam protested.

Dean nodded at him. "But no one's ever really found one. They're not real."

"Neither is alien abduction," I pointed out.

"But _something_ chomped on this guy," Sam told us, "and this is a scale."

Dean shook his head. "This couldn't get any weirder."

"Maybe we should get some help," I suggested to them. "Cause this isn't going anywhere."

"I'll call Bobby—maybe he's run into something like this before." Sam assured us.

Dean scoffed at that. "Oh, I'm sure he has. Just your typical haunted campus, alien abduction, alligator-in-the-sewer gig. Yeah, it's simple."

xx

"We decided to check the sewer anyway," Sam told Bobby. "So we split up—Kate and Dean took one side of the campus, and Lan and I took the other, but none of us were really happy to be teamed up like that…well except Lan and I cause we're not mad at each other."

Kate chuckled a little. "Dean and I aren't really either, I just wanted him to realize that the best he's ever going to get is right here."

"You got that right," Bobby let out, all of us looking at him and then he cleared his throat and got back down to business. "You find anything?"

Dean nodded slowly. "Oh yeah, I found something, just not in the sewer."

"And let me tell you, it wasn't pretty," Kate said, sitting down on the couch with me.

xx

**Dean's Side of the Story**

Kate and I didn't find anything in the sewers, so we decided to go ahead and head back. There were a few times when she tried to get me to care and share about Lana but all I said was, "I love her, let's drop it, it's none of your business". She didn't like just taking that as an answer but she did, and she and I climbed out of the sewer and walked back to the motel, both of us seeing the Impala, all of the air out of the tires.

"Son of a bitch!" I cried, hurrying to the car and finding a wad of bills on the ground next to it, 'Sam' engraved on the metal holder. "Sam!"

How _dare_ he do this? It was my baby and I couldn't believe that he'd done this to get back at me for taking his computer when I hadn't! He was going to _pay_ for this and when Kate and I got into the room, Kate closed the door behind us, me looking directly at Sam who was reading, Lana playing some game on her phone.

"You think this is funny?" I asked angrily as Kate got onto the bed with Lana and turned on her laptop.

Sam looked at me. "It depends, what?"

I mouthed 'it depends, what?' angrily. "The car!"

"What about the car?" Sam asked me.

"You can't let the air out of the tires, you Idiot! You're gonna bend the rims!" I yelled.

Sam straightened up. "Whoa, wait a minute, I didn't go near your car."

"Oh yeah? Huh. Then, uh, how'd I find this?" I asked, holding up the wad of money, making Sam check his pockets and then stand up.

He looked at me like this was all _my_ fault but it wasn't—_he_ had hurt the Impala and I had proof. I told him earlier that it would be the last thing that he would ever do and I had meant it. That car was my baby for a lot of different reasons and the fact that he had gone out of his way to do this to me made me angrier than before.

"Hey, give me back my money," Sam said, holding out his hand.

"Oh, no, no. Consider it reparations for, uh, emotional trauma." I told him.

"Yeah, very funny. Now give it back!" Sam said, following me over to one of the beds.

"No," I replied, taking off my jacket and moving my hand away from him.

Sam was getting more and more upset. "Dean, I've had it up to here with you!"

"Yeah? Right back at ya!" I said, and moved my hand again as Sam went for the money and then as Sam chuckled sarcastically he went for it again and I pushed him, both of us starting to fight on the bed.

"Come on!" Sam said, wrestling me for it.

I was feeling uncomfortable. "Get off of me!"

"Give it back!" Sam cried as we wrestled and Lana and Kate just watched.

xx

"Okay, I've heard enough," Bobby said, waving his hands.

Dean nodded slowly. "Anyway, you showed up about an hour after that."

"I'm surprised at you two. I really am—and I'm surprised at you two for not stopping them." Bobby told Kate and me.

I shrugged at him. "Kate and I were actually really hoping that one of them would get a black eye—they stopped, isn't _that_ the important thing here?"

"Sam, first off, Dean did not steal your computer," Bobby told him.

"But I—" Sam began, but Bobby put his hand in Sam's face.

"Shh, shh, shh, shh," Bobby said and Dean gave Sam a triumphant look. "Dean, Sam did not touch your car."

Sam chuckled at that. "Yeah…"

"And both of you should know that these two have had it figured out for a while." Bobby told them, motioning to Kate and I. "Why do you think they've been so calm, wanting you two to figure it out by yourselves? Come on—this is Kate Newman sitting here in this room with you…and if you'd both just pulled your heads out of your asses, it would have been pretty clear."

The boys glanced at us and Kate and I just shrugged because honestly…aliens and alligators? Kate had been researching this in more depth since we talked to Curtis. Sam and Dean were just too busy being at each other's throats to put it all together and since Dean was hurting me, I wasn't handing over any information—maybe that was a bad thing on my part, but now they'd know and we'd defeat it—win, win.

"What?" Dean asked him.

"What you're dealing with." Bobby explained and Sam and Dean nodded.

Sam took a breath. "Uh…"

"I got nothing…" Dean told him.

"Me neither," Sam agreed.

Bobby took a deep breath. "You've got a trickster on your hands."

Dean snapped. "That's what I was thinking."

"What? No you didn't." Sam told him.

I smiled a little—good ol' Sam and Dean trying to one-up each other and not really succeeding in it. They were both so cute when they were confused that for a moment I forgot that I was annoyed with them for letting this get so out of hand between. On the other hand, Kate and I had just fueled the fire…no good on us for that.

"I got to tell you…you guys were the biggest clue." Bobby said with a nod.

"What do you mean?" Sam asked.

Kate laughed and shrugged. "Tricksters create chaos and mischief as easy as breathing. They're fabulous—and by that I mean terrible."

"And it's got you so turned around and at each other's throats that you can't think straight." Bobby added after giving Kate a really good 'Dad' look to get her to change her opinion for a moment—at least for the duration of this conversation.

Sam nodded. "The laptop..."

"The tires…" Dean added.

"It knows you're onto him, and it's been playing you like fiddles." Bobby told them as he nodded slowly.

"So what is it—spirit, demon, what?" Dean asked.

"More like demigods, really." I explained to him. "There' Loki in Scandinavia, Anansi in West Africa—there are dozens of them."

Bobby nodded at me and smiled—he was proud and I was glad that he was proud. Honestly, I enjoyed Bobby's company when I did get it, and I was glad that he was here…that the boys trusted him so much. Not to mention he was totally attractive for an older man, so no complaints here.

"They're immortal, and they can create things out of thin air—things as real as you and me." Bobby told them.

"You mean like an angry spirit, or an alligator or an alien?" Dean asked him.

Bobby nodded again. "The victims fit the M.O. too. Tricksters target the high and mighty, knock 'em down a peg, normally with a sense of humor."

"Deadly pranks and such," Kate added with a smile and then she wiped it off of her face when Bobby sent her another 'Dad' look.

"Bobby, what do these things look like?" Dean asked him slowly and I smiled—he was getting it.

"Well anything really, but human mostly," Bobby told him.

Dean nodded and it finally hit him. "And what human do we know of that's been ground zero this whole time?"

Sam processed it. "The janitor…"

xx

Annie and I let the boys go in and we talked to Bobby for a bit the next day because it was where _we_ wanted to be. He was happy to hear us and to give us advice and I needed that—everything seemed to be going to Hell these days. Besides, it was nice to know that someone was on my side whether I needed them there or not.

"Why did you girls just let them keep going?" Bobby asked us.

I shrugged as I drank my coffee. "I've been annoyed. I mean I _know_ it's no excuse but…I just wish he'd stop trying to prove to me that he's not worth it, because I think he is…after all of this, I _still think he is_."

"You're definitely the girl for him," Bobby told me with a small smile. "I heard about Jen—is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's great and the kids too." I added with a smile. "Kevin's good and…I finally feel like Jen's going to have a good life."

Bobby nodded at that and then he took a breath. "Look, don't let Dean get you down, Lana. This is new and deep for him, but I can tell he loves you—even when he's mad at you he looks at you with care and concern…and love."

"Thanks for that, Bobby," I told him with a smile.

I reached over and I squeezed his hand, knowing that he was always going to be here for me and I needed that. I didn't have parents anymore—not until my mother came back out of hiding—and he treated Kate and me like we were his daughters. He was perfect…I _really_ liked having him around.

"And you, Kate. Wow…I guess I just wish I could see you in action," Bobby told her.

"Yeah?" She asked him, feeling a little proud of her reputation she didn't know. "Anyone in particular been giving me more praise than usual?"

"Heard from Jo not that long ago," He explained with a shrug.

Kate laughed at that. "Well I bet Jo said I'm not really all that cool—last time we were both high strung like Sam and Dean now."

Bobby shrugged and smiled a little. "Jo and you are opposites, though you both have a bit of that headstrong streak."

Kate nodded. "Well that streak runs in my family."

"Sure does," I agreed with a grin, still holding Bobby's hand.

Kate and I talked to Bobby for a bit before it got dark and we decided to go and see how the boys were doing. It was pretty much time for us to put our plan into action, and I was really hoping that this was the last of it…I wanted to move on from here. After talking to Bobby I realized that Dean and I _really_ needed to talk…and I needed to understand him more. He was Dean Winchester—I knew about his fear of commitment from the get-go and I couldn't do this to him…I couldn't push him away any more. He and I were going to work through our problems together and we were going to figure out where to go from here _together_.

"Just follow the plan," Bobby reminded me.

I nodded slowly. "We will. Kate and I are good at the taking out of demons part."

Bobby followed Kate and me into the building and we saw Sam there, placed just where he needed to be. They had argued outside already and Dean had gone in already and I wondered where he was. Why in the world would I let him do this on his own again?

"Where the Hell is Dean?" I asked him.

"I think he's in the auditorium," Sam informed me.

I heard some music playing and I raised an eyebrow. "These things can conjure things for pleasure, right?"

"Yeah," Bobby told me.

I laughed a little and shook my head. "Screw it, I'm going in."

I went inside even though the others told me not to, and saw the janitor appear in the chair and Dean talking to two scantily clad women. Yeah, because _this_ was making me want to stick to my more mature way of dealing with things…I don't think so.

"Trust me, Sugar, it's gonna feel real," the brunette said.

Dean gasped and I threw up in my mouth a little—really? The Trickster had conjured up these two bimbos for my man to use for his own sick, pleasurable amusement? Yeah, I didn't think I could let this continue.

"Come on, let us give you a massage." The blonde told him.

"Wha—" Dean stuttered. "You know, I'm a—I'm a—I'm a sucker for a happy ending, I really am. But, uh, I—I'm gonna have to pass." He told them, clapping his hands together.

I scoffed and Dean's whole body tensed. "This just makes everything so much better."

"I passed on the option," Dean told me when I came to stand next to him.

"But you thought about it," I reminded him.

Dean gave me a look. "Hey, I didn't sleep with my ex…this year."

"I don't think you're allowed to bring that up when you forgave me—I believe it 'made us even', remember?" I asked him. "Besides, Cassie has nothing to do with this and Lance and I just slept, there was no sex. Only guy I've ever slept with is you…"

"Wow…you two bicker like an old married couple," the janitor told us.

It was bad enough that I had asked Dean and he had turned me down—now the _Trickster_ had to go and joke about this? I mean I knew it was just an expression but come on! Why? I was going to stake him…

"Well that's good considering we're going to be one," Dean said before I could say anything.

I was _completely_ caught off guard by that. "What?"

"That means 'yes' eventually," he told me.

"Well isn't that sweet?" The Trickster said. "You know I know what you guys and your family do. I've been around a while—I've run into your kind before."

Dean nodded slowly. "Well, then you know I can't just keep letting you hurt people."

"Come on!" He said, leaning his head back on the chair. "Those people got what was coming to them. Hoisted on their own petards. But you, Lana, Kate and Sam—I like you. I do. So treat yourself, long as you want. Long enough for me to move on to the next town—Lana, I could even conjure you up something if you like."

I blushed a little and then waved it off, shaking my head and coughing when Dean gave me a look and raised his eyebrows. He'd just accepted my proposal—which we would _also_ have to talk about because way to make this proposal something to remember—and I was all _actually contemplating_ letting the Trickster do something for me.

"What?" I asked Dean, shrugging a little. "I passed on the option."

Dean gave me a look and then turned to the Trickster and made a face. "Yeah, _we_ can't let you do that."

"I don't want to hurt you," he said, eating some candy. "But you know that I can."

"I gotta tell you man, I dig your style, all right? I," Dean said, turning to the girls and cringing a little when I smacked his arm, "I do. And the, uh, slow dancing alien?"

We all chuckled a bit at that, the janitor more than Dean and I but it was definitely funny. I mean the fact that he came up with that in the first place said more for him than it probably should have…

"One of my personal favorites," the janitor told us.

Dean nodded, still smiling. "Yeah, but uh, I can't let you go."

"That's too bad. Like I said, I like you. Sam was right. You shouldn't have come alone…well just with Lana as accidental back-up." He told him.

"Well, you're right about me not coming alone." Dean told him, and Bobby, Kate and Sam came in armed with stakes, the Trickster knowing it was all a trick.

"You wanna see a real trick?" He asked us, and out of nowhere came a chainsaw man, and Sam ducked out of his way, the thing going after him.

Kate, Sam, Bobby and I went after the chainsaw guy—let's face it, I wasn't about to let my cousin get chopped up into tiny pieces—while Dean got beaten up by the women. I then turned to see Kate going after the Trickster on her own, but he flung us across the room with a look and then Dean was tossed into a chair. He was there at the Trickster's feet and I was cringing again—I _hated _being thrown _into _things…

"Dean…Dean, Dean, Dean," the Trickster said. "I did _not_ want to have to do this."

"Me neither," Dean told him, stabbing the stake into him.

It seemed to have worked because he made a face of pain, and then his apparitions went away, and he fell into the chair and lay there. I knew he had to go but he had been kind of fun—definitely more entertaining than other demons and ghosts we had to run into. Also, something about him felt off…something about him felt important and my whole body shivered.

"You guys okay?" Dean asked, wiping the blood off before I looked him over, taking a hold of his jacket.

"Yeah," Sam said slowly. "I guess.

"All I gotta say…he had style." Dean smiled, and then limped off a bit.

We all followed him, desperate to get out of here and move on because our job was done and we didn't want to get busted for murder. Someone was going to find him eventually…even though something didn't quite feel right…something was off…what was going on here?

"Hey Bobby, thanks a lot we really—" Sam was saying.

"—hey, save it. Let's just get the Hell out of Dodge before somebody finds that body." Bobby told him as I looked at the building, my eyebrows raised, everyone else hurrying to the car.

Kate took my hand. "Come on, Lanni—I know we'll talk about it later."

"Hey, Dean, um…I just want to say I'm, uh…" Sam said, leaning on the car as I nodded at Kate and followed her to the Impala. "Um…"

"Hey…me too." Dean replied and I smiled because they were so cute when they were 'apologizing' to each other.

I took a hold of Dean's jacket and looked him in the eye, glad they softened a little as he looked at me. He'd said 'yes' but had he _really_ meant it? We had been through a _lot_, and I was kind of wondering how we were going to survive this.

"You kind of deserved to be beaten up by those sluts," I said, and Dean frowned.

"I say 'yes' and you still say that?" He asked me.

I shrugged a little. "You're the one that thought about taking them up on the offer and though I thought about the offer of my own too, I just—did you mean it?"

"Lanni?" Dean asked me.

"What? _That_ doesn't answer my questions—that's just my name! I mean were you just saying 'yes' because it came to you in a moment of panic when he said we bickered like an old married couple, or did you actually _mean_ 'yes'? I mean it could take years for us to actually get married and that's fin, but I need to know that you want this future for us too eventually for real because I don't know how much more of this that I—" I rambled but soon Dean's lips were pressed to mine and I felt like I had my answer, so I kissed him back.

"Sometimes, you need to shut-up," he said lovingly with a smile. "I _meant_ it."

"You owe me," I told him, running my finger down his torso to his pant line, "a lot for everything you've put me through."

Dean smirked at me. "Don't worry about that. We'll just kick Sam, Kate and Bobby out so we can better discuss this new situation."

"If you two are done being vulgar…" Kate said, motioning to the car.

"You guys are breaking my heart, can we please just leave?" Bobby asked, popping his head out and then getting back in, Kate and I getting in too after I stole one more kiss from Dean and Sam and Dean followed suit, and we drove off, leaving this place behind us…for now.

**Note: And there you have it! It took him a while to get there, but Dean made the decision that he wanted and it only took 34 more pages from the last chapter. Who wants a fluffy chapter? Feedback is always appreciated!**


	20. Buried Alive

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay so here is a chapter and it has _some_ fluff but uh…not a lot.**

**I'm a big meanie.**

**This is NOT the sad chapter I keep eluding to, but this IS an emotionally charged chapter, all right?**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Kate's POV**

Sam and I were in a place where I wasn't quite sure what it was that we were doing because we'd lost some time. He had to get past Jessica—which would never really happen—and I had to not just take off when it felt like I was getting too close and I made no promises there. We both had some issues to work out and I wanted to try this, but Sam deserved someone that would stay and that potentially could give him a normal life…was that even me?

I'd never seen myself with a normal life before.

My sisters were the ones that wanted a normal life and so I tried to help them as much as possible to have one and right now I just wanted more than ever to try. Maybe it was the fact that I had almost lost Sam that made me realize that I didn't want to, but I had never been this close to a guy before…not without sleeping with him. Sam Winchester and I purely had an emotional relationship right now and honestly? I felt like that was the most dangerous kind because I was already in hook, line and sinker.

"So you guys can stay here for now, but um…I'd really like it if Sam and Dean stayed in this room, and Lana and Kate stayed in this room. No crossing over." Bobby said awkwardly. "I get that you two are engaged kind of now, and in love, but the walls are thin and seriously…no. Same goes for you two—I know you're involved too."

Lana nodded and smiled. "That's fine, Bobby. Dean and I _completely_ understand."

"Congratulations by the way," Bobby told us.

"Thanks, Bobby," Lana replied, and Sam and Dean went into their room after Dean kissed Lana tenderly.

I smiled a little bit. "Don't have to worry about me and Sam—not a beanstalk I've climbed yet."

"The mouth on you…" Bobby said with a shake of his head as he walked away.

I chuckled a bit at that and then went into the room I'd be sharing with Lana while she got a call on her phone. It was Jen's ringtone so it was probably important, but after that emotional ordeal with the Trickster, I just wanted to get some shut eye. So it was time to get into my pajamas and read a good book, and then pass out when my eyelids were too heavy to keep open anymore. I had to smile though, when I got a call from Sam, who was just in the other room.

"Can't get enough of me?" I teased and then smiled when Sam chuckled. "Look, I'm sorry about before, alright? I really suck at relationship stuff."

Sam took a deep breath. "I get that and I'm still here…I still want to be with you. So…date soon? I think we deserve a good, proper date, Katie."

"You're on, Sammy," I said excitedly.

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Hey!" I exclaimed excitedly as I answered the phone.

I had just gotten engaged officially and since Kate, Sam and Bobby had been there firsthand, this was how it was going—I had to tell my best friend. She _had_ to know, and she _had_ to be the _first_ one that I told because she was part of my life—a _huge_ part of my life. I wanted her to know, and I wanted her to hear how excited I was to be getting married to Dean Winchester, love of my young life…wow…_that_ was kinda mushy…

"Hi! You sound excited," Jen replied, laughing a little.

"Well I should be," I told her.

"How so?" She asked me.

I took a breath. "Well, I asked Dean to marry me."

"Wow. I wouldn't—wow." She replied and then laughed a little again. "Since you're so happy, I guess that means he said 'yes'."

"It really, really does. I'm engaged now, Jenny." I told her and then paused. "Wow…that feels kind of weird to say, but weird in a really _good_ way."

Honestly I didn't think I could hide my pleasure if I _tried_ to and that was saying something. I was _so_ excited about this, and I was wondering if Dean was as happy about it as I was. I mean things never really went our way, but this would bring us even closer together as far as I was concerned. I mean he was mine and I was his, and this was just a change of title…it was my way to _prove_ to him that I did in fact belong to him in a sense…and I hoped he was glad about that.

"I'm really happy for you, Lan!" Jen exclaimed and I could tell by her tone that she was. "I have to tell you, I didn't think that it would happen, but since it did, I'm happy for you…I'm mean you've always wanted to get married some day."

"Well, Dean is definitely one of those men that you would never think to be a man to get married but uh…yeah," I admitted with a nod. "I love him, and he loves me, and after a bit of arguing and what-not, he said 'yes'. That's all that matters, right?"

Jen laughed and I knew she was smiling. "That's all that matters. So I guess the four of you are doing peachy, then?"

"We're okay. I think we've all pretty much made-up, but I dunno," I admitted to her. "I have to call Annie and let her know soon, and maybe in a bit, Kate, Sam and I will be all better—things have been rough. Two budding romances between four hunters who have to spend every waking moment together? We were bound to crack sooner or later."

I knew that the four of us had our differences—we had a _lot_ of differences—but at the same time we got along. We were made up, but things were weird, there were still mysteries to go about figuring out and I mean…we were okay. We weren't _perfect_…but we were good…I really thought we were good.

"Well, I know you really want to celebrate with Dean and everything, but I caught wind of a hunt in your area." Jen explained to me.

I nodded slowly. "Sounds like a plan I guess. How dire is it?"

Jen laughed at that and I _knew_ she was shaking her head at me. "There have only been three deaths in the span of the last couple months, and though at first I thought I was finding a pattern, I haven't done that yet, and I haven't had a lot of time to look into this same building ghost haunting, but I figured that since you have Kate now, you could handle it."

"We can handle it," I assured her smiling.

I smiled even more as I felt familiar arms wrap me in a fond and loving embrace, and I leaned into Dean, his nose nuzzling my neck. He didn't understand how happy I was that we were _not_ fighting anymore and that we were back to our cute moments. They weren't moments _he_ took pride in, I didn't think, but I _loved_ them, and I _loved_ this, and I _loved_ him.

"Tell Jen I say 'hi'," Dean told me, his lips brushing across my neck as he spoke, which made me smile.

"Tell him I say 'hi' back and 'congratulations'." Jen told me, having heard him through the phone.

"She says 'hi' and 'congratulations'." I replied, and smirked as he nibbled on my neck a little and nodded against me.

When I giggled a little as Dean tickled me and nibbled on me at the same time, Jen laughed. The two of us got to hold and touch and tease like we used to, but him saying 'yes' didn't take everything away and we knew that, but for now this was a moment to be cherished. It was nice that he was being so cute and close to me but at the same time, _I_ had called _Jen_, and needed to get back to her.

"I will let you two go and be intimate for a while. Call me later and we'll hammer out the details, okay?" Jen told me. "I need to know when the wedding is and everything."

I nodded at her. "I'll call soon. I love you and Kevin and Kaydee and Minah."

"I love the lot of you too. Bye, Lan," Jen replied.

"Toodles, Jenny," I answered, and shut the phone, turning to Dean and kissing him gently. "I can't believe we're getting married, Dean…well I mean not right now, but…what made you change your mind?"

Dean rested his forehead on mine. "I don't want to lose you, and…when I was thinking about it I realized that I kinda liked thinking of you as my wife."

"You know," I told him, running my finger down his torso to the waistline of his pants, "a little more romance and mush could get you a naked me in the backseat of the Impala right now—just saying…"

Dean smiled at that. "Really? Well did I mention that I like the way Alana Rose Winchester sounds?"

"Sorry to ruin a moment here, but…I have a hunt for you." Lance told us.

Dean and I both stopped looking at each other, heads turning to Lance and clearing our throats. We had thought that we were in the hall by ourselves able to flirt and say potentially dirty things to each other all on our own but, uh…not so much. Apparently there was a hunt to do and Lance had brought it to us so we had to pay attention to him.

"I'm sorry—we didn't know Bobby had let you in," I told him, blushing and running my fingers through my hair. "What is this case?"

Lance nodded at me. "Well, there have been three deaths. All of the people unrelated—"

"—all of them killed by a ghost haunting the building." I finished for him.

"Yeah, figures Jen told you about it already." Lance told me with a chuckle.

I nodded and then realized that this was anawkward situation and I wondered why Jen did it. I mean I get that she thought we could use an extra hand just in case, but why send _Lance _of all people after what Dean and I had been through? Regardless of the fact that Lance and I really hadn't done anything, Dean felt threatened by him. Also, how did Lance know that…no, never mind…just because _I _never used any of _my_ magic like _ever_, didn't mean that Lance didn't use his…he could have found out on his own.

"Did Jen send you?" Dean asked Lance and though he was upset Lance had showed up and Bobby had let him in, he wasn't being a jerk about it.

Lance shook his head. "No, I caught wind of it and I thought it was something that Lan-Bon should check in on."

"Why?" I asked him and then I nodded slowly. "That might be why Jen told me she was going to talk to me later about the details…"

"Hey, Lance, why don't you let Sam here take you into the kitchen for something to drink and I'm going to talk to Lanni over here," Dean said, as Sam and Kate showed up behind Dean and me and then he took my hand and dragged me into mine and Kate's room at Bobby's for a moment as Kate went to greet Lance.

The look on his face was _definitely_ not a good one but I could get through this just fine—I just had to be honest with him. Then again honestly I didn't mind Lance being here because he brought us a hunt—brought _me _a hunt because he thought it would be important to me and he knew about my past so if it had to do with that, then I needed to do the hunt no matter what. If I was in Dean's shoes though, I wouldn't let _his_ ex stay, so Lance couldn't stay…I just needed the information that he had and then he had to leave.

"How does he know?" Dean asked me.

I forgot about that. "You mean about hunting? Lance has powers like I do…he, Jen, Chelsea and I used to do things together in High School—even though Chelsea never did any of the magic stuff."

"Okay, so…do you _want_ to take the case?" Dean asked me. "Punching Bag seems to think that you need to take the case—and what the _Hell_ is up with him calling you by a nickname?!"

"He's called me that since we became friends _years_ ago," I explained to him and wrapped my arms around Dean's neck. "Baby, I promise you, I'm going to get the information that Lance has from him and then send him back on his way, all right?"

Dean sighed loudly and nodded as I kissed him, sliding his hands down to my hips as I slipped my fingers into his hair, nodding into him. I relaxed and he hoisted me up, both of us knowing we shouldn't, but once my legs were around his waist, we were on the bed, him on top, me getting his buttons undone while he went for his belt. It could have been perfect…had Kate not walked right in.

"Whoa! Whoa!" she said, Dean sighing and me making a noise and closing my eyes as I lay my head on the bed. "First of all Bobby wouldn't be okay with this, and second of all, its one bed and I have to share it with Lanni tonight so _I'm_ not okay with it. Also…Lance says he doesn't have all day, so…"

I just nodded and kissed Dean swiftly, telling him I was sorry before I left the room, smiling at Kate as I went past. The sooner I talked to Lance, the sooner he could be on his way, and the sooner Dean and I could get back to normal…maybe cop a feel or two.

xx

**Kate's POV**

I was kind of entertained by the whole love triangle going down between Dean, Lana and Lance—and it was cute Lana and Dean were all over each other again. The best part about it was that Dean never looked embarrassed or ashamed about the sexual stuff—he almost flaunted it. I mean he never actually came out and talked about it in any great detail, but he never hid anything either so we had something in common.

"Just can't keep your hands off of her for one second, can you?" I asked him, laughing a little when he chuckled and gave me a look. "If you hurt her again, I'm gonna cut it off—it's a threat, so no cutesy asking or anything, okay?"

Dean nodded at me. "Trust me, I understand."

"Good…now how about we have a little chat?" I asked him.

"What about?" Dean replied.

I took a deep breath and then I closed my eyes a moment and then opened them. I knew it wasn't my place to tell Dean about Lana's past with Lance so I wouldn't—but he had to know a few other things. Besides, I wouldn't be a good cousin if I didn't make sure he was good enough for Lana—she was like a sister to me.

I finally found my words. "My cousin is beautiful, and she is brilliant, and she is—"

"—talented, kind, amazing at everything she does…I _know_, Kate." Dean told me, and though I hated to be interrupted, for this I would let it slide. "Look, I know that I don't have a good track record and I know that Lanni and I have had a bumpy ride, but I _do_ want to marry her someday in the future, and I _will_ protect her."

"All right," I told him with a nod. "You may proceed out to where Lance is."

Dean chuckled and shook his head, and we went out to talk to Lance about what was going on. Lance wasn't feeling normal to me, but at the same time...no, I had to go with my instincts. Lana was _always_ telling me that things worked out better if you went with your instincts so I should—besides, I gave her that advice first a long, long time ago. In fact Lana said she was going to research more with Bobby and I went with Dean, Sam and Lance to the abandoned building.

"I kind of wish Lana could have a baby so that I could get a pseudo niece or nephew." I mused as we looked around.

Dean nodded slowly. "Sometimes I wish that too, but…me as a dad?"

"Hello, can we focus on the case, please?" Lance asked us.

Dean shot him a look but I understood—Lance had wanted a life with Lana and she had told him she didn't want the same. Now she was moved on and about to have the life that Lance had wanted and it hurt him because he hadn't found _his_ other person yet. It kind of made me want to talk to Sam…a _lot_…

"Time to split up," I said, shooting Lance a look.

Sam sighed and took me by the hand. "Dean and Lance go that way, Kate and I are going this way."

"Fine," Dean grumbled and pointed towards a room. "Just don't bang her up against a wall and not actually get work done."

"Go," Sam said pointing.

Dean grumbled again but nodded and I looked at Sam as he pulled me off to the side a moment. I didn't know what Sam was doing, but it was kind of weird—it was like he was trying to get to me. Not in a he was trying to annoy me kind of way, but he was finally stepping in and trying to figure me out. It was nice…but it was also kind of…well weird to say the least and I didn't know how to react.

"So are you at a place where we can start opening up more?" Sam asked me.

I looked at the ground. "I don't know—I just have a tendency to put walls up."

"Yeah, I know," Sam told me, reaching out to stroke my hair, which made me look up at him and smile a bit. "I'm gonna try and make that process as easy as possible, all right? You just have to trust me a bit…now…are you a bit hostile because Lance is here? Because of his and Lan's relationship?"

"No…it has to do with their _past_ relationship." I explained to him and then I sighed. "It has to do with Lance _still_ being in love with her. Also…I know I can tell you anything, Sammy, that's what scares me. I like you so much that it might develop into more serious feelings and me and love? We're a bad match."

Sam rested his fingers under my chin and looked me in the eye, causing me to blush but I just wanted to be here with him. I just stared up into those chocolatey pools that were Sam's eyes and I smirked a little because I wouldn't be me if some dirty thoughts didn't cross my mind—perhaps banging against a wall—and Sam chuckled. Sam and I were going to be just fine if I just trusted him and I didn't feel like I couldn't trust him…in fact I felt like I could trust him more than anyone.

"I don't think you have to worry about anything," Sam told me calmly. "You and I are going to figure this out together."

I swallowed and nodded. "Yeah…okay…"

It wasn't really convincing and I knew it, but if I didn't stop looking in Sam's eyes right then I'd be trying to take him right then and there. I started to move slowly but Sam reached out and pushed stray hair out of my face, making me blush even more as Dean and Lance came over to us. Dean chuckled a little and I took a step back from Sam, clearing my throat and looking at Dean like I was waiting for him to say something already.

"I think we found another death," Dean told us. "Now what did I say about banging?"

"We're not banging," I said rolling my eyes. "Not yet…"

I probably shouldn't have said that because it was Sam's turn to blush, and then he was close behind me as we followed Dean and Lance and I got those feelings again. There were times when I honestly felt like I couldn't control those horny urges around Sam, but right now was certainly _not_ the time to try to act on them. Still, the feelings were there and I wasn't sure if I could silence them completely. Why, God? Why?

"We need to look up the history of the victims," Sam told us, wrapping his arms around me slowly.

Dean nodded and smirked a bit more, "and fast."

xxxx

**Lana's POV**

Bobby, Jen and I had come up with exactly _one _person who would do this: Chelsea. Oh God if it was Chelsea again, then what had I just let Kate go to do? I didn't want Dean, Sam or Lance to experience Kate losing control and trying to kill the bitch that threatened her family. This just couldn't happen like this, could it? _Why_ was Chelsea _doing_ this? I really needed to get on finding a way to kill that bitch…

"I don't know what else to tell you, Lan," Bobby told me, shrugging. "I think we have to trust Jen's research here and assume its Chelsea."

I sighed and nodded. "Sadly, I think we're going to have to assume that too."

"Do you want me to go with you?" Bobby asked me.

"No, no—stay here in case I miss them and they get back here." I told him, nodding.

He didn't like the idea of me wandering out alone, but it just made sense to me…at least it did before I got a weird vibe when I opened the door and a black cloud came into me through my nostrils and down my throat…

xx

**Dean's POV**

Sam, Kate and I stood over Lana's grave and I glanced at Sam as he held Kate to him, running his fingers through her hair as she cried into him. I couldn't lose it—I just couldn't. I had to be the one that stayed pulled together here…especially since I'm the one that had to make the final call.

It had all just happened so fast—one minute I'm in the building with Kate, Sam and Lance and the next Bobby's calling me. He's telling me that Lana fell on the floor and she wasn't breathing and he had called an ambulance and everything. No one could save her…not even me.

"Should we have burned her body?" Sam asked me.

I shook my head. "No…no."

"What if she comes back?" Sam asked again.

"Sammy, we're not going to burn her body," Kate said, slightly angry.

Sam sighed a little. "Not even if she could come back as an angry spirit? Guys I think we all know Lan well enough to know she wouldn't have wanted to come back as a monster that we hunt."

I just shook my head and turned to walk away from the grave. I understood where Sam was coming from—I did—but I was _not_ going to burn Lana's body. God, I couldn't even believe that I had put Lana through so much and then never even told her I loved her before she died. What the Hell kind of fiancé was I?! What kind of boyfriend?!

"We're leaving…now…" I told them, and we all got into the car, Kate in the backseat and Sam in the passenger one.

"Do you want to talk about it, Dean?" Kate asked me softly, but I stayed silent because I didn't—I had to be strong about this. "I know you loved her, and it will probably be better if you talk about it."

I just reached over to the stereo and turned on some rock music, letting them know that I couldn't do this. There was so much pain inside my heart right then, and if I talked about it, I was going to cry and I couldn't do that—not in front of Kate. I knew her well enough, and I trusted her now, but I wasn't _that _close to her yet…but I knew that because of her relationship with Sam, she would be sticking around for a bit.

Kate blew her nose and then called Jen. "Jen…it's Kate. We're on our way to see you…something happened…to Lana." Kate explained and she paused and took in a shaky breath. "She's—she's dead."

xx

**Lana's POV**

I woke up coughing, trying to sit up, but hitting my head on something soft. I fell back down, reaching up to touch my head, and suddenly felt very confined. What the Hell was going on around here? What was that black smoke? Where was I? What had happened?

"What the…" I began, and reached around. "Am I in…no!"

I reached around, finding my mini flashlight in my shoe, and then I turned it on, screaming, and then quickly stopping. I was buried…_alive_?! Last thing I remembered, I had opened the door to go and find Sam, Dean, Lance and Kate and a black cloud had entered me—then it was all one big black hole of nothing so I knew I had been possessed…but now I was _buried_?!

"Shit!" I cried, and banged on the top of the coffin for a little while before I reminded myself that if I was buried, I had limited air. "Maybe my phone will work."

I searched around for my phone amazed it was in my back pocket. What the Hell was going on? I was buried. Didn't that mean I got to be in nice clothes and everything? Of course walking around with wanted people probably meant that they just put me in a coffin and they buried me themselves—great. I turned it on and sighed—it only had half its battery left.

"Well, at least it has a—no! No, no, no!" I said, noticing it had no signal. "This isn't good. This is really, _really_ not good."

I moved the phone around, just to make sure, and realized that near the bottom of the coffin, there was an on and off signal—it was really weak, and prolly wouldn't work, but if any of them got a call from my phone, they'd figure something out, right? I sure hoped so. I didn't know how long I'd been in here, so I didn't know how much longer I had and _that_ was the worst thought I could have: suffocating to death.

xx

**Kate's POV**

"We're not finding anything, Dean." Sam said, shutting his laptop loudly and standing up. "I don't know what else to look for."

Dean whirled on him. "That demon killed Lana! I'm never going to be able to see her again so don't tell me you don't know what else to look for, Sam!"

"Dean, seriously…" I said taking a deep breath, "…chill."

"Kate, don't tell me to chill." Dean told me sternly.

He was hurt and I knew that and he was trying to be calm but he was not the _only_ one who was hurting here. I had just lost my cousin—my _almost sister_! I had been separated from her for awhile and now we were together for a while longer and we were close and I had met Sam and there had been nothing I could do…I had lost her. I had lost her to a demon and there had been nothing I could do to help her—nothing Lance could have done to help her—and when she died, Lance took off to go and console Jen and Sam, Dean and I…we were trying to find the demon and murder it.

"Dean, we are just as hurt by this as you are!" I yelled at him.

"But you aren't! No offense, Kate, but you don't know her like I do!" Dean told me. "You may have known her your entire life, sure, but I've known her for nearly two years! The years after her adopted parents burned to death! The years that she's gone through the most! I let her all the way in! I almost had a kid with her! I was going to _marry _her! Damn-it, I'm in love with her!"

Sam and I both wanted to say something like, 'Dean, you have to let her go', but we kept our mouths shut. It would have been a rather logical thing to say but it was something _much_ easier said than done. This was Lana…she was our family…and now she was gone and none of us knew what to do.

I took a deep breath. "You know what, she's still my family, just like Sam is yours. I saw her through school, picked her up when she was down and vice versa. I would never claim to say that I love her more than you, but you can't tell me for one second that you loved her more either…we just loved her differently. We just…we loved her. That's really what this is about."

"Do you know what this week has been like for me?" Dean asked me.

"Dean!" I cried and I shook my head. "This is not 'feel sorry for Dean' day! That demon possessed Lanni, and killed her from the inside out! While it was in her, it killed two innocent High School students, and though luckily no one identified her or caught enough of a glimpse of her, we lost her to it! You have to be calm, so we can find this thing and kill it!"

Dean nodded slowly. "You're right."

"I know I am," I replied, slightly calmer than before. "Now let's please do this."

"I'm going to destroy that son of a bitch," Dean promised before grabbing a spellbook.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I couldn't get through, and nothing was happening anymore, besides this sudden feeling that maybe I should sleep. Should I sleep? When you sleep don't you use less oxygen? Maybe it was in my best interest to sleep…no, then I couldn't dig my way out…

"This is just terrific," I told the coffin. "I don't think it could possibly get any worse than this."

"I beg to differ." A demonic voice said.

I sighed loudly. "Great…my only company is a demon."

"I didn't even scare you? Seriously?" It asked.

I shrugged. "Trust me it doesn't get scarier than being buried alive…I mean unless you get buried alive pregnant cause then you'd be breathing for two."

I knew it really wasn't the time to be cheeky with a demon, but at the same time I had nothing else to do. At least bantering would keep me alive long enough to figure out how to get out of here.

"That's true," the voice replied.

I took a breath. "You were the demon that got inside of me, aren't you?"

"No—I let someone else do that for me…I'm simply the mastermind," the demonic voice replied. "I am actually kind of glad this is all working out like this—seeing Annie again will be nice."

"What do you know about Annie?" I asked her.

The voice laughed. "Oh Annie and I go way back."

"You know, I have limited oxygen, so if you could speed up this little chat that would be perfect." I said, getting a little annoyed.

The voice sighed. "Fine—ruin my fun. Annie and I were friends, much like you and Chelsea actually. I swear other than the fact that Annie is cooler than you, you guys are very much alike."

"Oh, so you were a vampire too, I take it?" I asked sarcastically.

"You know, Lana, I don't have to be nice to you. I could just have my little demon possess you again until your oxygen runs out," the voice threatened.

Well since that was definitely _not _the ideal plan for me, I shut my mouth and I took a deep breath. It was pretty much time for me to try and dig my way out—maybe use some magic if I could focus well enough. Why not let the demon talk and tell me what she wanted to tell me?

I nodded slowly. "Go ahead…tell your little story."

"Thank you," the voice said, cheerier. "I was actually always like this, all powerful and manipulative—Annie just couldn't sense me until she grew into her powers. I kept that girl on her toes—she never would have taken out my rival demons had I not tipped her off so much."

"So you're like an evil Jen?" I asked her, definitely curious about this.

The voice laughed. "I guess you could say that. Oh, and here's the real kicker—thanks to me, Annie's going to let you die in here."

xx

**Annie's POV**

I went to go be with Sam, Kate and Dean when I heard about Lana and when Jen showed up, I sighed a little and Jen wrapped her arms around me, hugging me tightly. Both of us had cried enough, but the sadness was still overwhelming and we didn't know what to do or how to do it. We didn't know what they were dealing with and I wanted revenge…I wanted Lana back.

"I'm so sorry, Annie," Jen whispered to me.

I nodded slowly. "I'm sorry too, Jenny."

Jen kissed the top of my head, and then pulled away. "Is there anything you need me to do?"

"Kate and I have hit a dead end," I told her, shrugging. "What am I supposed to do?"

Jen reached out and stroked my hair, nodding slowly and handing me the papers of research. She and Kate had been trying to help me out with the case since Sam and Dean were kind of in moods lately, and it was nice. Jen didn't _have _to be here for me—she didn't _have _to be so wonderful—but she was…Jen just naturally was.

"Are there any demons Lan may have pissed off in the past?" Jen asked me. "Actually, don't answer that—it doesn't give us a definitive answer."

I sighed loudly instead of chuckling a little. "Wait a minute—I knew a Victoria that _I_ pissed off in the past—this could fit her MO—Victoria killed High School students when we went to school together. I just never knew until…until I witnessed it all myself this one time. I've…before meeting up with Lanni I only killed two demons by myself—one was Victoria…except that…well that Victoria never _stays_ dead, kind of like Chelsea…"

"Sounds like you have quite the past," Jen said with a nod. "You and Kate both."

"We do," I admitted slowly. "We really, really do."

"You wanna share?" Jen asked me slowly. "I mean you don't have to if you don't want to and we both know Kate isn't a care and sharer."

I nodded and took a deep breath. "I guess it's time."

_I smiled as I stuck my books in my locker—Penn Grisham had talked to me last period and I had been waiting for it for ages. He had asked me to be his girlfriend and of course I said 'yes'—I'd been pining for him for years and now everything finally seemed to be going my way._

"_Ann!" Victoria called from down the hall._

_I shut the locker door after grabbing my science books and I turned to Victoria and smiled at her. She was my best friend and I had delicious news to tell her that she had to hear from me before the whole school found out about it._

"_I just heard the news! Congratulations!" Victoria exclaimed. "I'm a little hurt you never told me though."_

_I made a face. "It **just **happened and you were the first person I was **going** to tell! Give me a little bit of slack here."_

"_I'm just giving you a hard time, Ann," Victoria told me, waving it off. "So…"_

"_He's taking me to the new blockbuster hit tomorrow night," I said happily, "you know…whatever **that** is."_

_I never really kept up with what was going on in movies even though I should—I was supposed to be living a normal life. This was why I was moved away from Lana…I was supposed to stick to being normal so that neither me, nor her was in danger. It was just hard because I couldn't just **forget** about Lana—she was my **sister**!_

_Victoria smiled at me. "Wow! You have to tell me absolutely EVERYTHING!"_

"_I will. You're my best friend, Vicki—you're going to know." I told her, rolling my eyes._

"_Wow…you and Penn Grisham. That's—you've been pining for him for the last year." Victoria said contemplating it all. "Okay, a little longer than that."_

_I blushed a little. "Yeah, but with all of the hanging out and everything lately it **had** to happen eventually, didn't it?"_

_Victoria laughed at that and shrugged and we both thought the same thing: not necessarily. Things in my life had a habit of falling apart and Victoria knew that—she knew everything about me…**everything**. Best friends just didn't keep secrets from each other and that was that. Thinking about it all kind of made me want to see my sister, but Victoria had that look in her eyes…I wonder what it was **this** time._

"_You free tonight?" Victoria asked me._

_I nodded quickly. "Yeah I am, why?"_

"_Well…we have a problem. I think there's going to be a demon around tonight." Victoria whispered softly and I sighed—Victoria's feelings were **never** wrong._

"_All right," I told her, "but first, can we sneak around to Lanni's?"_

_Victoria nodded and smiled. "Of course we can."_

_I was so thankful for her and for her understanding that I needed to make sure that Lana was alive and happy. So we went through the rest of the school day and then that night we snuck out and sat in a bush outside like we always did. Lance was over that night and they were cuddled together on the swing out back._

"_You ever feel like something is just off?" Lana asked him, kissing his neck softly._

_Lance nodded and smiled. "Sometimes, Lan-Bon."_

"_I mean do you ever feel this cosmic force? Like, right now I feel so much like something lost is near—I know it's near." Lana explained to him._

"_I know what you mean, Lan." Lance told her. "I just think that maybe if you focused on your powers a little more you'd know what this something lost is."_

_She nodded slowly and sighed, smiling a little when he kissed her, which made me smile too—she looked so peaceful. Lance knew her so well and I was glad that he was there for her because she seemed to depend on his so much. To top it off she **trusted** him, and trust like that didn't just go away._

"_You know, I don't think I could have asked for a better boyfriend," Lana told him. "You, Mom, Dad, Chels and Jenny are all I have."_

_Lance smiled and kissed her forehead—he was so much like a Sam before the demon things happened to him. He was just so much like the kind of man that Lana needed in her life…because the fire would happen soon. Then everything in her world would start to fall apart and she'd need him to lean on._

"_And you'll never have to let us go," Lance told her, stroking her cheek softly, "because we love you."_

_Lana smiled and kissed him again. "And I love you guys too."_

"_She's so happy," I told Victoria as we slunk away and Victoria wrapped her arms around me which made me smile a little because I loved that she was there for me._

"_I bet she'd be happier if she knew who you were." Victoria said, and before the two of us could say anything else, we saw a demon attacking a girl._

_As I fought the demon, Victoria pretended to move the girl away from the fight, and killed her where she stood, slitting her throat, the girl's blood splattering on her, but Victoria didn't flinch—this is what she did. She ditched the knife after rubbing off her fingerprints, and then hurried to me—at that point I was killing my very first demon._

"_Another one showed up and killed her!" Victoria called as I decapitated the demon in front of us._

"_What? We have to get out of here." I said, and then we ran home rather bloody, washing ourselves off and getting rid of all traces of the dead girl._

"Wait…so Victoria set you up?" Jen asked me.

I nodded at her. "Yeah…she would stage these things where there was supposed to be a demon, and then kill the girls. That was the only time a demon actually showed up. I was always off securing things, and then Victoria would say the demon came, attacked, and she tried to fight them, but they got away."

Jen took a breath. "So how did you piss her off?"

"Even demons hate being sent to Hell, Jenny." I answered her.

xx

**Lana's POV**

"What do you mean Annie won't save me?" I asked, my lungs starting to hurt, as the air got less and less breathable.

"Annie thinks she sent me to Hell…that poor girl. She has _no _idea what I am or how to deal with me—but even so I was always there for her," the voice told me. "She'd rather see you die anyway—you the sister who never went looking for her. I could even go and face her and she wouldn't even try to kill me again, I bet you."

I took a deep breath. "Wait a minute…you're Victoria, aren't you? Annie mentioned a Victoria she had to kill when we were catching up the night we met up again."

"Why, yes I am—you're good, Lana. You're a lot better than demons give you credit for." Victoria laughed. "I mean look at you, Lana—you're stuck down here listening to me talk instead of using your powers to get yourself out of this mess before you die. What are you doing, Lana? Feeling sorry for yourself?"

I made a face. "I don't know what you're talking about—I kick demon ass."

"You _used_ to kick demon ass," Victoria corrected me. "Lately now the Winchesters do it for you because you gave up. You used to be fabulous at the job—you used to be number one. But now? Now you're Sam and Dean's side-kick…it's sad really."

I shook my head because I knew what she was trying to do—she was _trying _to get me to use my powers but why? What was the advantage to that? Yes, I suppose I could get myself out but…why would she _want _that? I was getting confused now.

"What do my powers have to do with anything?" I asked her.

"I'm not talking about your powers, Lana—well not _entirely_ anyway—I'm talking about being distracted." Victoria explained in a rather bored sounding voice. "You let your love get in the way of your smarts."

"I do not!" I argued, trying to get more air. "Kate and I figured out about the demi-gods! Sam and I took out the ghost possessing the car! Jen and I took out Chelsea! Let me out of here!"

The panic began to rise in me as I realized I'd never see them all again, and I beat on the top of the coffin, my knuckles throbbing with pain as I tore at the cloth on the top. I could do this—if I just got through the wood now, I could get out. I stopped though, as I felt a pain in my abdomen, and I knew I was running out of air, but I felt something else—I felt Dean's presence above me.

"Excuse me, Lana—I need to go and turn your fiancé around." Victoria told me.

"No! Don't!" I cried, the tears coming. "Let him do this—let him grow from this. Visiting graves is hard for him."

Victoria laughed loudly. "You really love him, don't you?"

"More than anything," I replied, pounding on the top of the coffin.

"And you'd give your life to save him, wouldn't you?" Victoria asked me.

The tone in her voice actually kind of freaked me out…what was she getting at? I mean of _course_ I would die for Dean—Hell I'd _kill_ for Dean if I had to. So if I told Victoria that…what exactly would I gain? What would _she_ gain? Only one way to find out…

I swallowed then took a breath. "Of course I would."

"Then don't try to get saved—let yourself go." Victoria whispered to me. "You do that, and I leave them alone."

I looked down at my phone, my finger ready to press the speed dial for Dean's phone, but I stopped. Part of me knew I couldn't trust her, but with me down here, I couldn't stop her from killing them and if she really _was _telling the truth, then…that was all it took. I shut the phone, another pain shooting through my abdomen, my eyes closing as the oxygen began to be almost nonexistent—everything burning.

xx

**Dean's POV**

I looked at the gravestone and I wiped away the single tear that had fallen. It hurt that I felt like I couldn't cry—hurt that I couldn't find it in me to actually show the emotions I wanted to show…_needed _to show. If I hadn't spent so much time fixing the Impala, I would have been bashing it in again with a club, but I knew I couldn't do that either.

"It feels like everything is slipping away," I said out loud. "I can't believe we'll never talk again. Never touch again. Never be near each other again. I—I can't believe you're gone…I feel so responsible for this, Lanni. I can't believe you're dead."

"She's not dead yet, but she will be," a woman told me, and I turned to see a raven-haired woman standing before me.

I raised my eyebrows. "What are you talking about? Who are you?"

"I'm talking about Lana suffocating six feet below where you're standing," she said and then she _laughed_.

I couldn't figure out if this was a demon or just another vindictive bitch from Lana's past but I was furious. How could _she_?! She just _laughed_ about Lana being _buried_ _alive_ and how the Hell did she know that anyway?

"Let her out!" I cried and went for her, but she held up her hand and I found himself frozen there.

She smiled at me. "You buried her—doesn't that haunt you?"

"I buried her because she was cold—she was stiff!" I protested not believing what I had done to the woman I loved. "She wasn't breathing! There was no heartbeat!"

"Growing up with a psychic witch as your best friend has its advantages let me tell you. I mean I have my own amazing powers, but I wouldn't have even known about Lana, Annie or their origin had it not been for Annie." She explained to me. "Though Lana isn't a big fan of Romeo and Juliet, I did a good impersonation of it—I made her appear dead to you—I wanted to break up the team."

"You son of a bitch," I hissed at her. "I hate you."

She shrugged and smiled. "It happens. She gave up for you—she decided not to try and call your phone again when she felt your presence—she's letting herself die so I won't hurt you or Sam or Annie anymore."

What? Why would Lana _do _that to me? I didn't want to live without her! How _dare _she give up to save _me_?! I felt the tears stinging my eyes and I attempted to blink them away, but I couldn't—they were going to come. I didn't want to cry in front of the demon that had killed Lana, but I didn't know what else to do. My harsh words weren't coming—I couldn't fight back the feelings anymore—I let the tears slide down my cheeks but no sobs came out.

"Oh stop that," the woman told me, annoyed with me.

I composed myself. "You took her from me, and I'm not going to let you get away with that—I'm going to _kill_ you."

"I do some pretty crappy things," she laughed and then she smiled at me and shrugged. "It's kinda what I do and I think its fun."

I opened my mouth to say something else but Kate, Annie and Jen showed up, Sammy right behind them. I was glad to see them but I didn't want them to waste any more time—if Lana really _was_ still alive, then we needed to dig her out and _now_.

"Victoria," Annie said with a nod. "You just don't stay dead, do you Vicki?"

Victoria smiled and let her hold on me down. "Hello, Ann."

I went for Victoria since I could move again, but she saw it coming and waved her hand, sending me flying backwards into a tree. One of the branches ripped my flesh at my side and I grunted a little but it didn't matter. All that mattered was getting Lana out of the ground but when I tried to open my mouth to speak, nothing came out and Victoria smirked.

"Now is _not_ the time for talking, Dean," she told me, and then she looked at Annie. "What's your back-up going to do now, Ann?"

"Just stop this, Vicki!" Annie cried, shaking her head and then opening her eyes in horror as Victoria sent Sam into another tree as he ran at her, Jen muttering a spell under her breath. "STOP!"

Victoria sighed loudly. "Annie, Annie, Annie—I thought this was what you wanted."

"No, Vicki," Annie told her firmly, "I never wanted Lanni to die."

"Well I'm afraid you can't stop that, now. Lana's given up trying to get out of that grave." Victoria said, looking at it and smiling.

Kate's eyes widened. "She's still alive? We _buried_ her _alive_?!"

That was all I wanted them to know and the look in Jen's eyes was kind of breaking my heart even more. Jen had been by Lana's side since before they were born really, and to know that she was buried alive…it was breaking her and Kate too. Why was all of this happening to us? What was the motive? Was it just for Victoria's sick pleasure?

Victoria nodded and grinned. "I had actually thought you would have done the right thing and burned her body so she wouldn't come back as a spirit, but…it was much more fun this way. Besides, we can't just have her dead, now can we?"

"You haven't changed, Vicki—it's always been about fun with you." Annie told her angrily. "It didn't matter at college when Penn and I were having problems, it didn't matter when Penn and I had made-up and were closer than ever, it didn't matter when those girls at the party died—you always cared about having fun. Me going out to meet new people when Penn and I were fighting was fun for you—talking about Penn and I sleeping together for the first time even when I wanted to stop the conversation was fun for you—killing that girl at the party was fun for you—and torturing Lanni is fun for you. Will you ever grow up?"

Victoria laughed at her. "Figure out what I am, Ann, honey, and everything will finally become clear to you."

"I can't believe we were ever friends," Annie said and then pointed to the grave we'd put Lana in. "Help us get Lanni out."

"Oh you can dig all you want—she has exactly two minutes and seven seconds of air left—even if all four of you dug as fast as you could, you wouldn't get to her in time." Victoria replied with a laugh. "I'll see you around soon, Ann, and you…"

Victoria turned to me and then she knocked me out with a tree branch with a malicious smile on her face.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I knew that I couldn't trust Victoria to keep her word—Annie had told me all about her and it finally clicked for me: Victoria was a Trickster. That meant that she would get pleasure out of making my loved ones suffer even if I wasn't there to watch it—she wasn't the nice kind of Trickster that was for sure. This was a game to her—it wasn't knocking the mighty off of their pedestals.

I gasped for air as I made it out of the grave, and I lay on the ground, feeling like I had no strength left in me. I took in as much air as I could, crying a little into the dirt—that was one Hell of a climb. My whole body ached, I needed air, and my knuckles were wet and throbbing—I needed to go to Jen's.

"I couldn't just be a sitting duck," I whispered coughing a little and trying hard to stop being so dizzy.

I stumbled around a bit until I got to Jen's house, knocking on the door, and falling into Kevin, who steadied me and let me in. He held me close to him and helped me to stand, looking me in the eye and kissing my forehead. I was glad to have him and he looked like he was _beyond_ thrilled to see me—who would have thought Kevin and I actually meant so much to each other?

"You look terrible, but alive." Kevin told me.

I just nodded, closing my eyes. "It was one Hell of a climb."

"You dug yourself out of your grave?" Kevin asked, completely surprised and brining me water.

"Where's Jen?" I asked him after I nodded.

"She's at the hospital, along with Kate, Annie, Sam and Dean." Kevin explained to me. "I'm here to grab the girls and take them to visit their mother."

"I knew she wouldn't keep her promise." I said, and tried to stand up, but I fell back down. "No…I have to get up."

I stood, Kevin steadying me, and then he grabbed Minah and Kaydence and we went to the hospital. Kevin had gotten me a washcloth to wash off my knuckles, and once at the hospital they checked me in and checked me over. I showered and then went into Jen's room, Jen looking up from the bed, her eyes surprised and threatening to cry because she was happy too—I was happy to see her as well.

"Oh my God," Jen said, and Sam was already on me, wrapping me in a firm hug, Kate letting out sounds of glee.

"Thank God, Lan." Sam whispered, and kissed my forehead.

"We thought you were really gone." Jen added, and I kissed Sam's cheek swiftly, running my finger over his head wound, and then sat on Jen's bed, holding onto Kate's hand as she also watched over Sam.

I was so glad that everyone was all right, even though I _hated_ having to see Jen like this—in a hospital bed. Jen had always been afraid of hospital beds, and when I opened my mouth to joke about it and prove to her that I was okay, Kevin came into the room and Jen smiled at him. Her girls were with him and I was glad that they were so happy and together…made me need to see Annie and Dean.

"You okay?" I asked her.

Jen nodded and smiled. "I'm fine—I'm alive."

"That's fantastic." I told her, smiling when Kevin brought the girls over and let them get on the bed. "Where's Annie?"

"She's in Dean's room—she wanted to tell him how sorry she was you were gone in person—she feels so responsible for what happened to you." Jen explained to me.

I nodded, and rested my hand on Sam's as he hugged me again, hugging Kate again too. "We'll get through it…now you just spend time with them and I'll be back—I have to go see the fiancé and make sure he isn't trying to die on me again."

Jen nodded and Sam kissed the top of my head, him and Kate following me, my hand in his. I smiled at Jen when I got to the door and paused when I heard her speak up to stop me. She had noticed my knuckles as Sam had, but he didn't want to talk to me about them while Jen was dealing with her daughters.

"How are you?" Jen asked me.

I smiled sadly. "For climbing out of my own grave…I'm good."

She nodded sadly and I left the room and wandered to Dean's, smiling a bit even though he wasn't awake yet, and he was cut up on his face a little. Annie had her eyes closed, sitting next to his bed, but a smile spread across her face and she looked up at me, jumping up and embracing me, and we cried a little, Sam and Kate smiling at us.

"Hey, lil' sis." I told her, kissing the top of her head.

"You smell clean." Annie said softly.

I nodded slowly. "I showered when I got here in my hospital room—seems _everyone_ had a rough day."

"We really, really did." Annie admitted, pulling away and wiping her eyes. "Wait…how did you get here?"

I teared up. "I clawed my way out."

Sam took a deep breath and ran his hand along my back as Annie reached out slowly for my hands. She looked them over and then started to tear up too, looking up into my eyes and taking a deep breath. I was trying really hard not to cry but I knew I was going to end up losing it…because I had had to climb my way _out_ of my own grave…

"Your knuckles are torn up." Annie whispered to me.

I nodded and forced a smile. "But I'm okay."

"You don't look okay, Lanni. You look scared and…small even." Annie said, and we hugged again.

"It was scary, Annie—it was really, really scary." I admitted to her, nodding into her, Kate hugging us both for a moment or two as I cried just a little and then bucked up.

Annie kissed my cheek softly as she pulled away, and then she took Kate and Sam with her out of the room. She had to make sure that they got the attention they needed and she wanted to make sure Jen was going to be all right, so I sat next to Dean's bed. I took his hand and I kissed it, before I decided to just crawl onto his hospital bed with him.

"Now that I'm here, the least you can do is wake up." I whispered in his ear.

I ran my fingers through his hair and leaned over to kiss his lips softly, nibbling on the bottom one a little, Dean stirring. He had been through quite a lot today—as had I—but I just had cut up knuckles…Dean was emotionally hurt right now. I was really happy to hear his breathing change a little and I kissed his head again.

"You're lucky I didn't have to haunt your ass." I whispered to him.

Dean's eyes opened and he looked at me, tears coming to them, and he sat up, me making him lay back down as he cringed. Victoria had worked him over and he had ended up in the hospital, and he needed to take it easy. Besides, if I was going to have to talk about what had happened to me, then I needed him to lay down so I could…and cry a little.

"You took quite the blow." I told him.

"How are you here? You didn't have any oxygen left." Dean told me. "Please don't tell me that I have to kill you because you're not really here."

"As soon as Victoria left me to talk to you, I broke through the lid of the coffin and crawled my way out of the grave." I explained, trying not to be scared about it, but I knew that I was. "Cheesy as it sounds, my life flashed before my eyes. My lungs, my eyes, my nose, my chest and my stomach burned, but I had to get out. I couldn't just lay there and wait to die…that just isn't me, you know? I had to see you all again—I had to see _you_ again. I asked you to marry me, I can't back out now."

Dean smiled a little at my attempt to joke and sat up a little bit even though I gave him a look. He wrapped his arms around me and I loved being in his strong, warm, embrace so much that…I started to cry. Dean nodded and cried a little too, so I kissed his shirted chest and I looked up into his warm hazel eyes.

"How are you?" He asked as I sniffled.

I took a deep breath. "I'm healthy, so…I'm fine."

"I'm glad you're here, Lanni." Dean told me, then he closed his eyes in relief, and I kissed his jaw line softly, feeling more at ease as his warm lips touched mine.

xx

I rested my hands on the tile in the shower, and I cried as the water ran down me—I couldn't get clean enough. I showered at least twice a day, and I was starting to be a little OCD about washing my hands. Ever since the first shower I had taken to get the dirt off of me and out from under my fingernails and out of my nose and ears, I had felt dirty—I hadn't felt right.

When I got out, I dried myself off, and then I got dressed and sat in my room looking at my hands, trying to push the thoughts away. We were all out of the hospital now, but I was having a really hard time forgetting being buried. To be in such a confined space, unable to reach anyone, knowing you have limited time to live—it eats at you. If I hadn't clawed my way out, I wouldn't be here right now—I'd be dead.

"What if I had given up?" I asked myself suddenly.

If I hadn't felt _so _strongly that Victoria was lying to me, I wouldn't have climbed out—wouldn't have been able to climb out. I would have just let the burning and gasping continue until it was all over—I actually would have laid down there to let Annie, Sam and Dean live. Then again all demons lie, so I couldn't lay down there forever.

"You okay?" Dean asked me.

I looked up abruptly. "Huh? Yeah."

"You look kind of pale, Lanni." Dean said, coming over to me and looking me over, my knuckles bandaged.

"I'm still a little shaky." I told him as I shrugged.

Dean nodded slowly. "You clawed your way out of a six foot deep hole."

"I'm still amazed about that—I should be dead right now, Dean." I told him.

I looked at him as he sighed loudly and climbed onto the bed with me, getting as close to me as possible. Dean wrapped his arms around me and held me close, and I stroked his cheek as he cringed a little. I really loved him, and I didn't know what else I would do right now…I felt like mixed with Dean's smell and the smell of soap, I could still smell dirt…this was terrible.

"She did a number on you, didn't she?" I asked, referring to Victoria.

Dean nodded slowly. "Yeah, she did."

I nodded slowly and decided that the smell of dirt was just too much so I took Dean's hand and led him into the bathroom. He was confused at first, but I just shook my head and started to unbutton his shirt, sliding it off of him, and then turning on the water in the bathtub. Dean reached out and took my hand and I stopped a minute, not looking at him because I knew he was _really_ concerned about me.

"Haven't you showered already?" Dean asked in a whisper.

"I'm just making sure you're clean." I replied softly. "I want to make sure that gash in your side isn't going to get infected."

"Baby, I'm fine…I'm worried about _you_." Dean stressed, tugging on my hand and making me turn to face him, so I put a brave face on.

I was glad he cared so much, and I was _so_ thankful for him, but I really needed to do this. It was becoming pretty apparent to me that I needed to go ahead and get into a more playful mode and if that was what I needed to do, then so be it. He and I needed to mend, and we needed to put all of this behind us for good.

"Well, when have you ever said 'no' to taking a bath with me?" I asked playfully and Dean slid his hand into my hair, his thumb stroking my cheek, and then he kissed me.

"What are we waiting for then?" He asked me.

I smiled at that and nodded, glad the two of us were on the same page now and I put bubble bath ingredients into the tub. Dean stripped down, taking the bandage off of his side, and then I stripped down too, laughing as he gave me a look.

"What?" I asked him, a genuine smile on my face.

He pointed to the tub. "You never said I was taking a girly bath."

"Since when are bubble baths girly?" I asked him, laughing again.

"Since the beginning of time." He replied with a look and a nod.

"I'll have you know that bubble baths can be very manly." I told him, wrapping my arms around his neck.

He slipped his arms around my waist. "Oh really? When?"

"When you're enjoying them with a beautiful, naked woman…" I whispered, and kissed him softly.

"All right…you've made your point." He whispered, brushing his lips against mine.

I nodded, and then we got into the tub, me sitting in between his legs, my back against his chest. He kissed my head and I smiled, closing my eyes, relaxing against him as he held me and ran his fingers along my arms, his nose nuzzling my neck.

"We'll be all right…I promise." He whispered to me.

I smiled and snuggled into him more the tears stinging my eyes, him holding me tighter as he noted the change in my breathing. He kissed my neck softly and nodded slowly as I nodded, both of us just trying to get through this. I wanted to be all right and someday I would be—_especially_ if Dean was here with me.

"I believe you." I whispered back wiping a tear away.

**Note: Okay this storyline changed a LOT from the original one, but I love it more now because I think it makes more sense with what I was trying to do from the beginning. Also, I wrote this storyline AGES before Lazurus Rising—like TWO YEARS before (I wrote the chapters that were episodes the first time around during the episode when it aired after the Hellhound thing happened so Lana could have genuine reactions—sometimes she has the same thought process I did when I was watching the first time around only with a little less information obviously), so…keep that in mind and I hope you guys liked hearing some about Annie's past! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	21. This is How A Heart Breaks

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**This chapter is _also_ emotionally charged, so there's the warning for that, but things get lighter and fluffier, I promise you. Something big happens in this chapter emotionally and I think you'll all enjoy the Sam/Kate part in it.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

I woke up with a start and I caught my breath, quickly getting out of bed before Dean realized I had had the nightmare again. I threw up in the bathroom from the panic I had felt a few moments ago, and I got into the shower, clothes on, turning on the showerhead and cleaning myself off, even though I was already clean. Then I got out of the shower and tracked water across the floor, walking outside and sitting underneath the tree near the motel.

"What is wrong with me?" I asked myself, looking at my knuckles that were healing rather nicely. "I'm fine, I'm out, so why am I so scared?"

"Lanni?" Dean asked me.

I wanted to tell him that I was fine but the words just weren't coming out for me at all and I started to cry instead. Dean took off his jacket, draping it around my shoulders as I looked at his bare feet. How could he come out here in the cold without shoes on?! Was he an insane person?!

"Dean, you should go inside—it's cold out here." I told him.

Dean knelt in front of me and held my face, me looking him in the eye. "Hey…you're the one who's wet and sitting on the ground. I'm far more worried about _you_."

I couldn't help but smile a little at the stern, loving tone and I nodded, glancing at his feet and then at my wet clothes. Yeah, because _he _was the insane one…I didn't think so. _I _was the insane one and if I didn't get my act together, I was going to have to stop all of this and get some therapy instead of continue hunting.

"I—I can't do this, Dean." I told him, crying some more, and Dean pulled me to him, holding me tightly and letting me cry into him. "I—there was so much dirt…I ate dirt."

I laughed a little to try and lighten the mood and Dean nodded, running his hands up and down quickly trying to warm me up. He kissed the top of my head and whispered that he, Sam and Kate would see me through this if I let them and I nodded—I believed him. How could I not believe the man that I loved so much?

"You're shivering, we should go inside." Dean told me.

I shook my head. "I don't want to go inside yet."

"Lanni…" Dean said soothingly, and there was something in his voice that let me know that I was loved.

Why did he do this to me? Why did he have to be so concerned? I knew that he was my boyfriend and that he wanted to marry me someday and that he loved me and that should answer my question, but it just didn't. For some reason I felt like I should be dealing with this on my own and that Dean shouldn't have been taking on all of my burdens, or any of them for that matter…maybe that was how he felt 90 percent of the time…

"We should go on in before you catch cold." Dean told me. "Kate would kill me if I let you get sick."

I nodded and stood up, both of us going into the bedroom, and me changing into dry clothes as Dean went to make me something hot to drink. Kate and Sam were spooning and sleeping peacefully and I sighed—they had no idea that anything was even happening. I went out and sat on the couch, Dean coming over with hot chocolate and I smiled at him as he sat down next to me.

"You going to be okay?" Dean asked me. "I mean I know that's a terrible question to ask, but I'm so worried about you, Lanni."

I smiled at the hot chocolate. "Vanilla ice cream instead of marshmallows…"

"You hate marshmallows in hot chocolate." Dean replied with a smile. "So…you sure you're going to be okay?"

"Yeah…yeah I'll be fine." I told him.

He nodded slowly as I nodded and then he stood up as I blew into the cup to cool the hot chocolate before I sipped it. Dean stroked my hair and I closed my eyes a little, and then he pulled me close and let me snuggle into him, yawning a little bit. He was obviously tired and I couldn't blame him and yet…and yet he was far more worried about me than he was about getting his sleep—not even a snarky remark and so I _had _to speak up. There was pretty much nothing to stop the words from coming out of my mouth.

"Stay with me?" I asked him.

Dean sat down next to me and I set the hot chocolate on the coffee table and laid down, Dean on the outside of the couch holding me, and I buried my head in his chest—he was warm and loving, and I was very happy Dean was here for me. Then again it didn't surprise me that he was here for me…he always was. The kiss he placed on my hair line with a whispered 'I love you' only cemented to me that this thing between us was more than real.

"Thank you." I whispered to him.

Dean kissed my head. "You're welcome."

xx

When I woke up, I sighed because Sam and Dean were talking angrily to each other, but making it sound like they weren't arguing. I had a really bad feeling that it was about me and I hated that—I really _didn't_ want to be the reason they were yelling. Why couldn't this be easier? Why couldn't this stop being depressing?

"What was I supposed to do, Sam?" Dean asked him. "She doesn't want to talk about it and I'm not going to force her to!"

Sam sighed loudly. "Dean, this is serious! Come on, we have to get her the help that she needs! Hunting isn't the answer and you know that!"

"That's not for us to decide, that's all on Lanni!" Dean responded angrily. "Stop acting like you know what's best for her!"

"She's my _best friend, Dean_!" Sam replied, Kate sighing too.

"She also can't be forced into something like getting help," Kate said, agreeing with Dean. "Yeah, she needs it, but it's her choice."

"So don't you dare push her, Sam," Dean said forcefully and I didn't know what to do.

Part of me wanted to just get up and tell everyone that they had a point and figure out what to do on my own because I was a big girl, but I didn't have the words. Everyone was focusing on me instead of on hunting to protect innocents, or on each other and I didn't want to be the center of attention. Normally I loved that, but not now and not like this because this was just getting ridiculous.

"Guys, we _have _to do something about this! She's washing her hands eight times over and showering with her clothes on!" Sam said, setting his cup down loudly. "This is what family does, okay? They make hard decisions for the right reasons to protect the people that they love the most."

Kate took a deep breath. "I agree with you, Sammy…but she's a grown woman."

"You're acting like I don't love her or something, Sammy," Dean said and he was hurt.

"Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Dean!" Sam told him suddenly. "Dean, Lanni loves you, and you need to stop acting like I'm telling you that you don't love her because clearly you do! It's written all over your face whenever you look at her, or when you talk about her, but Dean…_she was buried alive_! She has gone through a lot of stuff that you should be more pro-active about! If this was Kate, I wouldn't be standing there being stupid!"

"Stop calling her 'Lanni'." Dean told Sam after a pause, and I heard car keys.

"Dean, where are you going?" Sam asked exasperatedly and Kate got up and went towards the door too.

"We're getting breakfast," Kate replied with a sigh, and she and Dean left the motel room, leaving me to sit up and sigh as Sam plopped down on the other end of the couch.

He glanced at me and immediately knew that I had heard all of it and he just nodded as I looked at him. This was one fine mess we were in and it was _all_ just one big misunderstanding that needed to be cleared up and soon. I didn't want Dean thinking he was second-fiddle even when he knew deep down that he was just being ridiculous about all of it…he'd come to his sense eventually.

"Thanks for everything," I told Sam softly.

Sam shook his head and put it in his hands. "You shouldn't be thanking me for anything. I just made everyone think that I'm in love with you or something. Kate was out of here pretty fast."

"It's okay. _I_ know you're not." I told him, running my fingers through his hair. "Besides, when does Kate ever pass up an opportunity to yell at Dean? Dean's just upset because he's in so deep with me and doesn't know what to do. Don't worry about it…this has nothing to do with you."

Sam smiled at me. "That's true…speaking of Kate, I think I'm falling for her."

"That I could see coming from a mile away," I laughed and then took a deep breath as I looked at the door Dean had stormed out of. "I think he feels like he can't save me…when he's calmed down, one of us should talk to him—maybe me."

Sam nodded slowly. "That's probably the best idea, Lan."

"You're calling me 'Lanni' suddenly, which is weird—a Dean given nickname..." I said softly.

"I'm just worried more than normal, Lan." Sam explained, shrugging and reverting back to his other nickname for me.

I smiled at him. "I know it's not a secret pining of love, I was just pointing it out."

"Good. So since they left and will probably be too mad to bring us back food, how about I whip us up some waffles?" Sam asked me. "That's the beauty of being in your home."

"_Our _home," I corrected him, wanting him and Dean to think of it as their place too, "and it sounds _lovely_."

"So we're good?" Sam asked, going into the kitchen.

I nodded and smiled at him. "We're fantastic, Sammy."

xx

When Dean came back, he and Sam went out for a bit to talk to each other, and ended up being gone for a good couple hours. I was kind of worried about that, but hoping for the best at the same time, and when they came back, Dean was talking about this case he had found, and Sam suggested the four of us go to a bar, and so we complied, Kate and I a little weirded out that Sam had been the one to suggest the idea.

Actually, the two of them were feeling kind of weird to me—like they were them, but both of them were off. Kate was feeling it too as in she could tell that something was seriously wrong, but we just waved it off because honestly _all_ of us were a little more emotionally charged than we should have been and we needed to relax. So we grabbed some beers and then we sat around and talked a bit, Sam flirting.

Kate made a face. "What the Hell is up with Sam? I am this close to grabbing him by the ear and dragging him out to do him on the side of the building…"

"He _is _being a bit out of character, don't you think?" Dean said slowly, looking over at Sam angrily and yet it felt like he was…hinting at something…weird. "Besides, I can't always flirt with people because you hate it—he's practicing his skills."

"I don't want him practiced," Kate said as she drank her beer angrily.

"I never said you couldn't flirt, Dean." I told him. "I don't care if you do it when we're on a hunt and it needs to be done to get information out of someone. I know that at the end of the day you still love me and the only girl you want is me."

"True," Dean said with a smile.

"I mean _I_ did _propose_ to _you_." I reminded him, setting my hand on his. "I know you, whether you want me to or not…"

He smiled and nodded, squeezing my hand tightly. "I know."

"It's how I know you're not really Dean…" I said with a smile.

He looked at me with wide eyes and I knew that I'd hit it on the head and Kate did a double take, but then her jaw dropped. They had felt so off because they _weren't _themselves and the sooner the better that we get them swapped back out. Why didn't they tell us? Why didn't they just come right back and ask us how to change them back instead of going through this charade?

"I'm killing your boyfriend in a horrific way," Kate warned me, standing up and grasping her beer bottle tightly.

I laughed a little bit. "You and me both—why, Sam? Why didn't you two just come to us?"

Dean sighed a bit. "Dean is an idiot and he made me promise."

"Well, it's a lousy promise," Kate said, sitting down when I motioned for her to. "Lana, you had _better_—"

"—Kate…I got this…" I told her with a laugh, getting up and going over to Sam—who of course was really Dean—chatting up two girls at once.

I didn't care if he was in Sam's body…what in the world was Dean _doing_?! He and I were still practically _engaged_ and all of this could have been figured out _so_ much faster if he and Sam had simply _told_ Kate and what was going on. It meant that he agreed with Sam and wanted Sam to be the one to tell me what Sam thought only in _his_ body so that I would do it. I took more kindly to Dean when he told me to do things just as he took more kindly with me when I told him to do things.

"But isn't it hard?" The blonde asked him.

I walked right up to him and got in between him and the girls. "Dean Winchester, I am _so_ upset with you, you have _no_ idea!"

"Who is this?" The redhead asked him.

"Look, he's mine so I need you to back off and let me fight with him. Goodbye." I told them and gave them looks, whirling on Sam again. "Where in the _Hell_ do you get off telling Sam to be you?!"

Sam growled a little. "He _told_ you."

"Of course he didn't tell me! I know the difference between the two of you, in different bodies or not!" I exclaimed angrily. "Look…I know why you did it but you're enough for me, okay? If you think I need help, just say it, don't send Sam to me in your body to do it. Communicate with me…we're never going to be able to get married someday if we can't communicate, okay?"

Sam sighed and nodded. "Yeah, okay…"

"Good…now come back over with me now so that Kate doesn't fillet you…"

Sam laughed at that and we went over to Dean and Kate, me finding it a bit hard right now to look at them. They were in each other's bodies and Kate and I were both feeling a bit awkward and we wanted it fixed…and right now. Besides, in retrospect it was good that I figured it out now and not trying to have sex with my boyfriend—I was counting that as a lucky break.

"What could possibly have made you two switch bodies?" Kate asked as we joined them. "When you're you again, Dean Winchester, I am punching you."

"The woman we're looking for." Dean explained to us. "She switched us, so Dean's in my body, and I'm in his."

I nodded slowly. "Wow…know we could have had this problem fixed sooner had you just come to us and told us what was up."

"I just—I thought that Sam was better at wording things and I thought that maybe if he stayed in my body until we figured it out, and he made you feel better, you'd be happier with me." Sam told me with a sigh.

"You're an idiot," I told him softly.

Sam nodded softly. "It has been said."

I opened my mouth to say something, but I closed it and just shook my head because I knew that I couldn't say anything. I mean sure I was sad that Dean actually thought he wasn't enough for me, but nothing major had happened yet and Kate and I knew now so we could fix it. Besides, when it came to secrets, I was the queen of them so I couldn't very well get on my high horse about a single thing.

"Good thing I know when Dean is Dean and when he's…you know…Sam…" I said laughing a little bit.

Kate laughed too and then nodded gently. "Guys…I found a lead."

xx

**Third Person**

"_Look, Sam, I **know** that you and Lanni have this deep friend connection and at times I've thought that maybe it was more, but it's not…you get each other though. I don't want to fuck this up because she's the first girl that I've really fallen for, and we're getting married someday." Dean explained to his brother._

_Sam nodded at him. "Dean, I get that—I **really** do. I just—I think that you need to start thinking about maybe getting her to get some help. I know you hate to be alone and being away from her is hard, but it's the healthiest thing for her."_

"_God you know everything, don't you?" Dean asked him._

_Dean knew he had no reason to be angry, but he couldn't help how he was feeling—he felt like he was losing her. She had been buried alive, he had pushed her really far away, and now he had no idea what to do and Sam seemed to know everything about it somehow. They're connection was really getting to him and unlike every other time, he just couldn't seem to get past it…at all._

_Sam sighed loudly. "Dean…I'm just trying to figure out how to help her. If you were me, you'd be telling me the same thing: to get Kate some help. What she went through was really traumatic, Dean. Lan had to dig her way out of her own grave! I want to help her because she's my best friend and this is the only thing that I can think of. God if you knew what it was like being me."_

"_If you only knew what it was like to be me, Sammy." Dean replied quickly._

"_Would you kind fellows like to buy some flowers from a poor old woman?" An old woman on the street asked._

_Sam smiled at her. "Sure."_

_Dean gave Sam a look—flowers? Now? Sam just wanted to change the subject from the conversation that they were having, and so why not buy flowers from an old lady? There was no harm in it. So he bought some flowers from her and smelled them, making a face._

"_Interesting…" Sam said softly._

"_Enjoy them." The woman told them with a toothless grin, and it was slightly ominous._

"_Smell them." Sam insisted, shoving the flowers in Dean's face._

_Dean frowned and pushed them away after catching a whiff. "Unlike you, Sam, I'm not flamboyant."_

_Sam made a face and then they both stood there for a second, feeling a little woozy, falling on the sidewalk, knocked out cold. A few people caught sight of them and pulled out their phones, but the two got up after a moment or two and both looked at each other as they composed themselves. They made different exclamations and then stared at each other, wide-eyed._

"_Why the Hell are you wearing my face, Sammy?" Sam asked him._

_Dean closed his eyes. "This isn't good."_

"_What the **Hell** kind of flowers are these?" Sam asked, looking at the fallen flowers._

"_Maybe we should ask that old woman." Dean replied, and the two of them looked everywhere for her, but found nothing._

_Dean took a deep breath. "Don't you dare tell Lanni or Kate we're like this—they don't need to know right now."_

"_Why not, Dean?" Dean asked him. "They can help us switch back."_

"_Because things are already weird between Lanni and I—make her know I'm sorry and I care, and if you so much as put more wedges between Lanni and I, I'm going to kill you. Hey…I'm a giant." Sam said a little happier._

_Dean shook his head. "Dean, I don't think that keeping this from them is a good idea."_

"_Well no-one asked you." Sam told him._

xx

**Lana's POV**

Following Kate's lead, we all went to this house and rung the doorbell, all of us waiting there. We were all out of sorts and in a funk due to everything that had happened. Things between the four of us would never be the same. These bonds we were making were going to last forever—whether we wanted them to or not.

"I was wondering when you guys would show up to get switched back." Victoria said happily, answering the door.

"You!" Kate exclaimed, lunging at her.

Victoria shrugged and let us in, putting up a force field as Kate went for her, getting knocked down to the ground. Dean was kind of pissed off still that Victoria had buried me alive and I sighed, holding him and Sam back. She took a deep breath and she nodded slowly, looking at me.

"It was fun. Yeah, yeah, I know—fun is stupid. Tell me something I don't know." Victoria sighed and handed the boys some potions. "I just couldn't resist because when I talked to Lana that while back, I saw in her memories how much it urks Dean to think he's second best, so why not do it? I knew Dean was a bit unstable and stupid, so I figured I could get my kicks this way, and judging by the looks you're giving me, Lana did something she shouldn't have done, meaning my job is complete."

"Victoria, can you please just shut your Demi-God mouth, please?" I asked her.

Victoria laughed loudly. "I'm done now, Lana, don't worry. Have fun, okay kids? And if you don't drink those potions…you're stuck each other forever."

With that said, Victoria disappeared into think air and I sighed. "Drink up, and Kate…if we're dealing with a Demi-God, then we need to pull out the big guns…okay? I have a feeling she wants to _stay _in our lives."

She nodded as the boys drank the vials and fell on the ground with a loud thud, both of them knocked out. Kate and I looked at each other and then knelt down by the boys, deciding to just wait until they got up. After a few moments they got up and brushed themselves off, both of them smiling at each other, Kate and I waiting for our answer.

"Damn it's good to be in my own body again." Dean said grinning from ear to ear.

Kate raised her eyebrows. "How do we know it's really you?"

"Kate, no one fits this sexalicious body but me." Dean replied with a wink.

"Unfortunately, it's him." I told her, and we laughed.

Kate nodded and then threw her arms around Sam, who returned the embrace. "Thank you, Jesus! So…moving on, now?"

"Absolutely, let's get out of here." Sam said, and he and Kate went past us, Sam and I locking eye contact and the look said it all—we'd talk.

There was a lot to fix after this and I wasn't sure how we were going to do it because things were more complicated. I needed to talk to someone about what was going on with me and I figured that maybe seeing a counselor was a good idea. I lost a baby, found out my little sister wasn't dead and then I was buried alive—I had a lot of baggage. Then there was Dean feeling like he couldn't help me and I just needed to fix this.

"Are we okay?" I asked Dean.

Dean kissed me softly, and I felt love and care, and I smiled as I kissed him back, wrapping my arms around his neck. He smiled into the kiss too, crushing his lips against mine and making me feel a little less like I was so broken because such a wonderful man loved me. We were happy together and we were going to get through this, so maybe it was time to just sit down, have a chat and get me some help.

xx

I woke up that night to the sound of my phone telling me that I had a voicemail. Somehow I had slept through my phone ringing and while that in itself wasn't entirely out of the ordinary, I knew that something was wrong, so I slowly moved out of Dean's loving embrace and I grabbed my phone off of the nightstand in the motel. Kate and Sam were spooning and they were so cute and I just sat up a little and put the phone to my ear, letting it dial and go into it.

"Hey, Lanni, it's me, Annie," Annie's voice said and I knew she was nervous. "I, uh…I found Mom, I think. I'm going after her and I will let you know if it's a false alarm or not when I get there. Wish me luck!"

Just like that I was fully alert and I got up and went into the bathroom, taking a quick shower and thinking it all over. Mom. Annie had found _our mother_. I got out of the shower and started to get dressed, Dean stirring, his hand groping my side of the bed and realizing that I wasn't there. He was alert then and it made me smile a little that he was so worried about me…but then he saw me getting dressed.

"Where do you think you're going?" Dean asked me slowly, sitting up in bed and looking at me.

Sam and Kate stirred as I said, "I'm going to find my father."

"Your father is dead," Dean said gently, shaking his head. "We saw his headstone."

"Annie's father, not mine—we're half siblings." I explained quickly, nodding when Dean gave me that look…I wasn't being truthful with them and it hurt him so much. "Dean, I don't even know where to begin…"

"Not what I wanted to wake up to…" Kate said slowly, sighing. "Something tells me that things are about to get ugly."

I took a deep breath and then started to pack my duffle, everyone getting up and getting dressed and asking me question—well, sans Kate. She knew my secrets—all of them—and she had wanted me to tell the boys a long time ago even though she was afraid of losing Sam. I understood that completely because I was afraid of losing Dean…I was so afraid of losing him…

"Lanni…look at me." Dean said, and I looked up at him slowly as he wrapped his arms around me. "What is going on?"

I bit my lip and I looked at Dean's chest, wishing I had the heart to say what I had to say next. I didn't, but I had to come clean because there were so many times that I had _wanted_ to say something about this but I hadn't. This was the perfect time…the perfect time to explain _everything_ to him.

"I've been lying to you—from the beginning." I replied.

Dean rested his fingers under my chin and I looked him in the eye. "Come again?"

"I've always known that I was different," I told him. "Annie and I knew when we were little that we had different dads and hers raised us. He was like my dad too, but he was her biological father and my father didn't like that. My father was something that my mother never planned on, but she fell for him anyway and then she found out what he was and she tried to get away—tried to get _far _away, but he knew what she was too. So…he forced her to have me and she took me away when she could and she hid and she met Annie's dad and they had Annie and my father didn't like that she was happy. That I was away from him and he…he…he killed Annie's father and then he disappeared and Mom left us with Bethany and Marcus until the Shtriga attack and then she got new parents. My parents are two very complicated people and only she knows where my father is…"

Dean's eyes were getting intense, and I had to look away again, and I let go of him. "What was your father?"

I swallowed against the lump in my throat and I wiped away the tears that were coming to my eyes. Everything was about to fall apart—everything was about to completely unravel and I couldn't stop it. If he was going to marry me, and he was going to be willing to possible figure out other ways to have a baby with me he _had_ to know my heritage…and he had to know it now.

"A very powerful demon," I said firmly. "All of these powers I have—the fireballs, the force fields, the moving people with my mind—my dad possessed my mother for nine months and out of that pregnancy came me. He wanted to have a child with someone with as much power as her and I just…I was so afraid to tell you because I knew you'd look at me differently even though I'm not evil."

Sam nodded slowly. "You were afraid we'd want to hunt you…"

"But she's not evil," Kate put in. "She's one of the nicest, good people that I know."

"Lanni…we're…" He began, and he backed up a little bit and looked at me with a look I don't think I'd ever seen him look at me with—with such disgust and love. "I can't."

I nodded slowly. "I need to go where Annie went…"

I tried not to let him hear the way my voice was cracking but how could I help it? Dean was giving up on us and I could see it in his eyes—he couldn't handle this. He _hunted_ demons—he _hated_ demons—why would _I_ be _any_ different for him?

"How could you keep this from me?" Dean asked me.

I collapsed on the bed. "I'm not my father, Dean."

"We can't—you can't—" Dean was saying.

"Dean, I'm _not_ evil—Hell, I fight _agains_t it. Why do you think I'm so good at sensing demons, Dean? Why do you think I'm so good at knowing when something bad is going to happen, or how I knew you and Sam were displaced?" I asked him. "Why do you think Annie felt so at home with Victoria?"

"I have to take a drive." Dean said, taking a small jewelry box out of his pocket and dropping it on the floor before leaving the room, leaving me to the conclusion that I was right—things just fell apart.

I didn't even go for the jewelry box but I had a feeling that I knew what it was—a ring, or a pair of earrings. All I could do right then was sit on my bed and cry, my head in my hands, the sobs coming out. Dean and I were never going to be the same and I didn't know what that meant for our relationship. We'd been through so much in such a short period of time and I couldn't do this anymore.

"Lana, honey, it's going to be alright," Kate said, pulling me to her and stroking my hair.

Sam nodded and knelt down in front of me, resting his hands on mine. "He'll be back."

"Doesn't mean that we'll be alright," I responded as I cried into Kate. "Everything is so wrong. I've lied for so long! Maybe I am evil!"

"Having demon blood inside of you doesn't mean you're evil," Sam whispered and wiped the tears off of my face and Kate kissed my forehead. "You're not your father, all right?"

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…but when he looks at me now, that's all he's going to see."

Thankfully, my phone rang before the other two could say anything and I reached for it, hoping it was Dean or Annie but it wasn't…it was Jen.

xx

It turned out Jen was having a serious problem—the twins were missing. So right when Annie decided to go off and take care of things, Jen showed up to travel with us. Why was _Jen _having problems too?! Wasn't her husband _just _kidnapped?! Hadn't we _fixed _it so that _no one else _in her family would get taken? She and Kevin were having problems and Dean and I were having problems, and I held her as she was silent.

"We'll find them, I promise." I told her.

Jen just nodded. "I trust you. So…what's wrong with Dean?"

"He…I told him about how my father was a demon and he walked out because he can't handle it." I explained to her.

"Honey…he'll come around." She told me, stroking my hair.

"Maybe," I said with a shrug. "I think that this one is pretty unfixable."

She looked me in the eye and sat up straight, giving me that look she was so good at giving me. She _knew_ that something was up with me and I knew what was coming before she even asked me. I took a deep breath and I tried to look alive, waiting for her to ask me what she wanted to ask me.

"Is there something you need to tell me, Lan?" Jen asked me.

I shook my head and stood up, smoothing down my shirt. "What? No."

"Lan…" She said sternly.

"I'm unnerved because I told the truth, and Dean ran out, but Sam was understanding about it all." I admitted to her. "It's just…it sucks. My whole life right now just sucks. Sam is the one that thinks that I need help because I'm still not over being buried alive and Dean, the one that's supposed to love me unconditionally, just took off and won't speak to me."

Jen nodded slowly. "It's a lot to take in—I mean he almost had a kid with you and it would have been a quarter demon."

"I'm just sad that Dean and I can't patch this one up." I replied with another shrug, tucking my hair behind my ear.

"Have you tried talking to him?" Jen asked me calmly.

I shook my head. "We haven't talked since he took his drive. You're married, Jen—how do you deal with fights with Kev?"

"We tend to yell and then go out by ourselves." Jen told me with a small sigh and then she shrugged and shook her head a little. "Then we talk and we snuggle, and sometimes we put the girls to bed and screw each other's brains out."

I tucked my hair behind my ear and I nodded. "So in order to be happy, Dean and I just have to fight, talk, snuggle, and have make-up sex."

"You didn't fight?" Jen asked me.

"Not really. He just kind of left then came back with you." I explained to her.

"You seem okay." Jen pointed out. "How'd you get over it?"

I shrugged. "Kate and Sam watched a movie with me."

I smiled sadly because it had been nice to talk to them and while Sam kept looking at me to really let it all sink in, he wasn't running. Kate trusted me and he trusted me and Sam had always seen things in shades of gray. I honestly wasn't worried about him accepting me, but the fact that Dean wasn't? It just hurt me so bad and yet I felt like I deserved it for not coming clean sooner. So my heart was filled with happiness and dread when the motel room door opened and there was Dean.

"There you are!" Jen exclaimed when Dean walked into the motel room. "I was starting to think that you no longer existed."

"Jen, you want to go and get food?" Dean asked, and he completely avoided eye contact with me, smiling at Jen. "Sam and I want to actually go out and eat."

Jen shook her head. "I think I'll stay with Lan."

"It's okay, Jen," I told her smiling. "I know that you want to catch up with them, so go on without me. I'll be fine, I promise. I have Kate and an old motel television, some cookie dough in the fridge, and Annie's supposed to call tonight."

"You sure?" Jen asked as I looked at Dean, who wasn't looking at me.

I nodded and forced a smile. "Yeah…maybe some good horror movie will come on. Or Buffy! I haven't watched Buffy in a _long_ time. I think I always liked that even though Angel was you know, a demonic vampire, he was good, and Buffy loved him."

"Angel also couldn't get happy." Dean said, not looking at me, but at least he was listening to the conversation.

"Love isn't always about getting happy, Dean. It's about trust and respect and communication." I told him.

He looked at me. "Which we seem to have a _terrific_ grasp on…"

"Sam's waiting for you in the car," I said, turning on the stereo so he would get the hint that I was still mad at him for not trying to work this out with me.

Unfortunately, _our _song came on and I realized that I really needed it not to because now wasn't the time. The first time Dean and I had actually laid around cuddling after sex we'd turned on my laptop and I'd played music—the first song that had come on was _**You're All I Have**_ by Snow Patrol. Dean noticed my face, his face softening, but I turned off the stereo and Dean left the room, Jen sighing.

"You'll work it out," she told me.

I just nodded and she left the room, so I went out into the living room area and I sat on the couch with Kate, listening to Dean, Sam and Jen driving away, and I turned the television on. There were some Buffy re-runs on, and so we watched the episode where she and Angel were trying to pretend nothing was between them anymore, and Faith and Zander tried to kill him. Then Sam walked in the door and I smiled at him, wondering why he was here and the other two weren't, but still genuinely happy to see him.

"How was dinner?" I asked him.

Sam shrugged softly. "Pretty good, and then Dean and Jen wanted to go to the bar, and I walked back to check on you two. You eat enough cookie dough?"

I laughed and Sam sat in between Kate and I, wrapping his arms around Kate and kissing the top of her head as I turned off Buffy. "I'm doing pretty good Sammy, thanks for caring. I just…want to talk to him. Hell, I would give anything to even just argue with him, you know? I don't want this to be the end."

"It's not, Lana," Kate said, running her fingers along Sam's chest through his shirt. "Honey, it's not. He loves you so much it hurts and that's why he's so upset."

I just nodded and turned the TV back on, smiling a bit when Sam put an arm around me too and Kate grinned. She loved our friendship and knew that she had nothing to worry about and I was even fine when he kissed my head and took her off to the bedroom. I didn't know what they were doing in there, but I had the TV to myself and I wondered what Jen and Dean were doing and/or talking about right about now...

xx

**Kate's POV**

I was actually a bit amazed that Sam was acting as cool about all of this as he was because if I were him, I'd freak out. Well…if I hadn't known the way that I did. Since my mother was Florence's sister, she already knew about Lana and so she made sure that Kalli, Kat and I did too so that we would accept her. Whatever it was that her father had planned to use her for, Florence had never wanted that for Lana and neither had the rest of us…so she was raised differently.

"You get it, but Dean doesn't?" I asked Sam as he closed the door behind us, taking a seat on the end of the bed and looking at him.

He smiled and shrugged a little bit. "She's Lan. Through everything she's been right there by my side even though I'm supposed to turn into a monster and I can't _not _stand by hers now. I completely understand why she didn't tell us and Dean does too he just…he's so bad at letting his emotions show. Lan is the first girl in the world that he has ever trusted as much as he does and it just hurts him that she couldn't trust us enough to say something—it's not that she has demon blood inside of her. She's not her father…do you know which demon it is?"

"I honestly have no idea," I told him truthfully. "All I know is that Florence was possessed when your mother died. Don't ask me all the details because I don't have them, but Florence took your mother's death really hard and she blames herself every day."

Sam nodded slowly. "They really were friends, huh? I wonder if my mother knew about the hunting or not…I don't know if I'm happy or mad either that she helped Dad learn how to hunt."

"They were avenging your mother," I tried, shrugging and then smiling when came and stood in front of me. "Sam…can I do something?"

"Like what?" he chuckled, amused by me.

Without any warning, I stood up and cupped his face, bringing him in for a kiss, Sam sighing contentedly into it and wrapping his arms around me. He kissed me back passionately, both of us unable to deny what was going on between us and for once I felt able to move us forward. Sam was different than all the rest because normally I was more like Dean—get in and get out—but something about Sam (and for Dean, Lana) made it impossible for me to act that way.

The flirting in the beginning had just been that, flirting, but then something about him started to chip away at my walls and I didn't quite know what to do because he was infecting me. He was this genuinely nice, genuinely good guy and he wanted me and I wanted him and I didn't understand why I couldn't just go for it. We could deal with the consequences later and maybe there wouldn't _be _any consequences…maybe I could stay and just be with him.

"I just want you," I told him as he pulled back, my eyes blazing into his.

He nodded and kissed me again, pressing my back up against the wall and moaning into my mouth as I wrapped my legs around him. Maybe it would have been easier to just push me down on the bed, but I was so turned on by being slammed against a wall that I could barely think straight as I got Sam's shirt off. Mine followed shortly thereafter and his lips started to trail along my chest, his teeth teasing my flesh as he went to unclasp my bra…but then the door opened.

Jen squealed, but her presence meant that she and Dean were back, so Sam and I knew that we had to stop…again. At this point I was going to give up because it seemed like every time we tried to have sex, we got interrupted or we talked too much and we stopped because we were over thinking it all. Then again, it wasn't all about sex and Sam Winchester went out of his way to be the perfect man for me…he went out of his way to make sure that I knew that I mattered to him—I had to do the same. Almost losing him had made me realize just how much that he meant to me and I couldn't let him go at all…I just couldn't.

"Hate to interrupt, but let's take me somewhere so Lan and Dean can talk, yeah? I have a lead on the girls." Jen told us quickly.

xx

Sam took Kate and Jen out to go and take a drive, so they said, and I looked things up on my laptop when she and Dean got back from the bar. I was pretty busy trying to keep myself busy because Dean still wasn't looking at me, and I tried not to let it get to me, but it was. Yes, I had made a mistake in not telling him and Sam sooner, but Sam understood and was still at least trying to be my friend and Dean was just sweeping it all under the rug.

"I'm sick of this." Dean said, and I looked up suddenly.

"What?" I asked slowly.

"You not talking to me." Dean replied immediately.

I got off of the bed. "You're not talking to me either—or looking at me, I might add."

"How could you not have told me?" Dean asked angrily.

I sighed loudly and ran my fingers through my hair, looking for the words—I didn't have them. There was nothing that I could say to him that would make _anything_ that had come out today _any_ better at _all_. My father was a demon, I had lied about it for almost two years now and he had every right to be mad.

"Dean, I'm sorry I didn't tell you before." I told him softly.

"That's not what I asked. I asked _why_ you never told me." Dean explained to me.

"Because I figured you wouldn't take it well." I admitted with a shrug. "I mean there were times that I wanted to, but I'd get interrupted, or something bad would happen and I didn't want to make the situation any worse."

Dean nodded slowly. "And to think, I was ready to propose."

"Dean…I _already _proposed." I said and I sighed when he nodded.

We had just hit that barrier I had been afraid of all this time—it was like I had lied to get close to them. It was almost like I had lied and then gotten them to accept me so I could use them in some evil plan of mine. Dean probably felt like shit because he had let me in—he had fallen in love with me and I had betrayed him in more ways than one…I _didn't _deserve him.

"I bought you a ring," he told me softly.

I nodded slowly and took a breath. "I don't think we can fix this, this time, Dean."

"You know all about my parents," Dean told me, continuing. "I have told you _everything_ that you needed to know. I mean there are things I haven't told you about my past, but they're _nothing_ like this. They're like hunts, and ex-girlfriends that you don't want to hear about, but _this_…some girl at the bar even kissed me."

"I am so tired of you running off to other girls when this is hard for you!" I found myself yelling at him.

At first I was just going to let him be angry, but this was the third time we had hit a bump in the road and he'd run off to some other girl. Of course things didn't get that far because he really was in love, but he was hurt and I was hurt and this was hard…this was _too _hard. We were just backing ourselves into a corner with no escape and we needed to quit while we were ahead.

"She kissed me, you know," Dean said with a sigh. "I pushed her off because I have you and I love you, but Lanni…this is hard. This is just _so _hard."

I nodded slowly. "So you're saying you want me to go?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying at all, actually." Dean shook his head. "You and I can't go back to where we were though. We don't know each other like we should know each other, and we shouldn't be getting married."

"So you're saying you want to break up?" I asked him.

Dean looked me in the eye and the hurt in his voice broke me. "I'm saying I don't trust you like I should."

I nodded slowly, more tears coming as my lips quivered and I tried to stay as calm as possible. He didn't trust me…why should he? I had betrayed him and I didn't belong with him—everything was against us and I couldn't stop that no matter how hard I tried. This was just the way that things were going to be now and I was going to have to work to get that trust back.

"Okay," I told him, my voice cracking a little.

Dean nodded slowly. "I still love you."

I just nodded and laid down on the bed, Dean laying there next to me, his hand on mine. He had tears in his eyes too and he held my hand, our fingers interlaced, both of us wanting more than anything to fix this right here and right now, but we couldn't, me knowing he was trying to make me hurt less, but I hurt more. Dean _loved_ me—he _loved_ me and I didn't deserve his love…especially when he could love me and _not_ trust me all at the same time…

**Note: And there you have it—trouble in paradise because I'm starting to believe that I'm actually _as evil_ as _Eric Kripke_. The next chapter is an episodic chapter, as is the chapter after it, and the chapter after that one is the saddest chapter I have _ever_ written…so…don't worry, I will keep you guys warned, all right? Feedback is always appreciated!**


	22. Coming to Terms

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**I am giving you guys this chapter for…hope, haha. The last one was just too sad an ending, so I wanted to let you guys know that a lot of happiness will be showing itself soon, along with something you might need tissues for.**

**I like writing angst, and darkness, and sadness, and betrayal and basically the emotional things, so I apologize now, but at the same time know that about me because all of my stories have darkness and angst…and lots of it, but there are beyond fluffy moments too. This chapter is…angsty but I _promise_ you that there will be some fluff soon.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

It had been a few weeks since all of the drama had happened—since Dean and I had argued about his ridiculous feeling like he couldn't make me happy and about how hard it was for both of us. Dean and I were at least still staying close to each other and he was there when I needed him, like always, but still, I was really annoyed that Dean felt like he wasn't worth anything, and I was really upset with myself for ruining things farther by trying to find my Mom.

I looked over at Sam and Kate as they and Dean slept, Sam and Kate as close as they could get, and Dean next to me with his arm draped over me, his hand on my stomach. It used to hurt that he automatically did that when he slept since I couldn't have a baby, but now I didn't care anymore. He wanted to protect me and I didn't mind that he wanted that because it showed me that even though our trust was still pretty broken, he was trying to be there for me but why?

On top of that, Kevin had called—Jen had come to us because Kevin had left, and now he had a solid lead on the girls and she was going to go and patch things up with him. This had been quite the year for Jen and me, but that's not even the best part. No, now our team consisted of Dean, Sam, Kate, me…and Lance. Yeah. Lance. My ex, Lance. The one that Dean hates, Lance.

Lance and I had a complicated history—okay, not complicated at all. Lance and I had been friends since we were 5, and we dated for three years then he proposed at graduation and I turned him down. We dropped out of contact, and then I saw him again, got drunk, slept with him—but not the sexual kind—and then he brought us a case and now? Now he's with Sam, Kate, Dean and I, and sleeping on the couch in the motel room because who found the case? Sam and Lance.

Something Kate's a little upset about as the seasoned hunter…

Getting Dean to agree to Lance coming along was hard too because of all of the past that we all had with him now. The only reason Dean agreed had nothing to do with Lance being on this case first—it had to do with me promising that the next spare time I had would be spent with him, and only him. So it was kind of working out, but at the same time I knew that Dean had only _really_ said 'yes' because Sam said we could use his help…Dean was just caving for me to show me things hadn't changed…even though we _both_ knew that they had—a _lot_.

"Sleep, Lanni. You haven't slept in days." Dean whispered to me.

I sighed and turned to look at him. "I just—Annie hasn't called. I'm worried about her. I mean what if she's hurt or something?"

I knew that reason was true, but I was thinking more about how Dean and I were so incredibly broken. In fact that was _all_ that I could think about these days and it was making it hard for me to focus, which is part of what Dean had been worried about all that time ago. I mean we were all patched up right now even though Dean was upset and I knew he thought there was more to my past that I wasn't sharing and honestly? There really wasn't that I knew. So maybe I could fix this…I wanted to _so_ badly.

Dean stroked my hair. "Annie's going to be fine."

I nodded and then I turned back over because for the last few weeks I'd been trying to get used to the fact that he and I had so much mending to do—so much work ahead of us. I was scared we weren't going to make it—especially since we had been butting heads ever since I'd proposed. Right now the two of us were on a break too, which really wasn't helping matters much. We had both agreed that we needed to get to know each other over again, so that just maybe we could put this all behind us.

"It's about time to go, isn't it?" Lance asked, poking his head in the room.

Dean made an angry face and I spoke up quickly. "Go grab some food and when you get back the four of us will be ready, okay?"

"All right, Lan-Bon." Lance told me, and Dean sat up and glared in Lance's direction as he shut the door and then he looked at me.

"Calling you nicknames is getting on my nerves," he told me.

I sighed loudly. "You've been testy. Relax. We're just friends."

Dean just let go of me and got up, and I sighed as he got dressed and then left the room, not caring that Sam, Kate and I changed in the same room and it bothered me. Yeah, Sam and I were just friends and he was with Kate and that was going really well, but he used to care before about that—used to not want Sam to see, not like he did anyway because Sam turned towards Kate and I quickly changed my shirt. Then again, maybe it was better this way because at least it wasn't Lance seeing me change because that jealousy towards Lance? Still there. Why though? What was it really about Lance and Lance and I that made Dean so angry?

"He'll...give him a little more time, Lan." Kate told me, stroking my hair.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…time…time to realize there are probably fifty thousand women out there who would treat him _far_ better than _I_ have been treating him lately and I don't think I could _not_ beat that said girl up."

"You and Dean will end up together soon, I promise you." Sam told me.

I just nodded at him because I wanted that to actually happen and so then Kate, Sam and I left the room after grabbing our bags, and we sat with Dean at the table as he grabbed a beer. Lance came in bearing vending machine food—Dean would never let Lance touch the Impala—and then Dean got up without giving Lance a chance to get all the way in to sit down yet.

"Let's go," Dean said, grabbing the keys and going past Lance, hitting him hard with his shoulder as he went. "Oh, sorry…"

He left the motel room and I sighed as Sam followed, and I walked up to Lance. "I'm sorry. He's really…he doesn't like you."

"I noticed," Lance told me softly

"You'll still always be one of my best friends, okay?" I assured him, kissing his cheek. "Just try and suck up to him because after what I did a few weeks ago, he needs to feel like he's on top."

Lance smiled at me. "To make things easier, when this is over—I'm leaving again. I promise."

"Whatever makes you happy, Lancey." I told him with a smile.

Lance chuckled and we went out to the car, sitting in the backseat together since Sam and Dean were in their regular seats. Kate let me sit in the middle like I was going to delegate things or something and Dean reluctantly got out onto the highway as I bit into a Baby Ruth, and we drove down the highway for what seemed like forever in silence before something happened.

"Holy—" Dean exclaimed, slamming on the breaks, and we came to a stop right in front of the woman.

"You've gotta help me." She said, going over to Sam's window and beating on it.

"All right. All right. Calm down." Sam told her as he rolled down his window. "Tell us what happened."

"I-I—we swerved. Then crashed." She was saying as we got out of the car. "And when I came to, the car was wrecked and my husband was missing. I went looking for him, and that's when the man from the road, he—he started chasing me."

Dean nodded and took the information in. "Did he…look like he lost a fight with a lawn mower?"

"How did you know that?" She asked him as Sam sent her a look and Lance and Kate leaned on the car next to me, Dean too busy covering for himself to notice.

"Lucky guess," Dean replied, smiling a little.

"Ma'am…what's your name?" Kate asked her, in 'hunter' mode now.

"Molly. Molly McNamara." Molly answered with a nod.

Sam looked at her softly. "Molly, I think maybe you should come with us. We'll take you back to town."

"I can't," Molly replied shaking his head. "I have to find David. He might have gone back to the car."

Sam nodded at her. "We need to get you somewhere safe first, and then Dean, Lance and I will come back here and look for him."

I gave him a look, because I didn't want to stay behind and neither did Kate—how come we were going to have to babysit here while _they_ were the heroes? I mean I understood that I didn't get to have _any_ special treatment at all, but come on…I wanted to help to fix this. That, and Kate was the more qualified hunter, so couldn't maybe Dean stay back with me instead?

"No. I'm not leaving here without him!" Molly told us. "Would you just, take me back to my car, please?"

"Of course we will." I spoke up. "She wants to find her husband—let her. She must be worried sick."

Molly smiled at me and nodded so we went to where the car was supposed to be, but it wasn't there, and it was nice and dark, and we were in creepy woods. It was pleasant—note my sarcasm. While Sam and Dean talked about telling her the truth and getting on with it, Lance, Kate and I had our own private conversation.

"I say we just go on into the woods." Kate told us.

I shook my head. "Count me out—no scary woods for me."

"I don't want to sound heartless, but you have nothing else to lose, Lan-bon." He told me. "Besides…you can't earn his trust back by being squeamish. Kate and I would have your back too."

"Yeah…I know." I sighed loudly. "I say I just go find the ghost and get this over with so I can go back to pretending that Dean and I are still together even though we've been ruined."

Lance nodded slowly and we looked over at Dean as he told Molly we needed to get to the police station. She agreed with him reluctantly so we all got into the car, Kate on Sam's lap in the front and Molly between Lance and I. I looked out the window as Molly began to talk, and I listened as intently as I could so I could solve this.

"We're supposed to be in Lake Tahoe." Molly said sadly.

"You and David?" Sam asked.

"It's our 5-year anniversary." Molly told us she told us and I smiled—it would be nice to have one of those eventually.

Dean took a breath. "Hell of an anniversary."

Molly and I gave him a look. "Right before, we were having the dumbest fight. It was the only time we ever really argued—when we were stuck in the car."

"I know how that goes." Sam chuckled and Dean gave him a look as I laughed.

Kate laughed too. "I second that."

"I third that." I replied, and leaned into the seat laughing as Dean shot me a look in the rearview mirror as well.

Well great, I wasn't making this any better on myself. Actually I was asking myself why I was still even there with them. I mean I had broken Dean's heart, I'd created the rift between us, and…why wasn't I with Jen? Why wasn't I with her creating some kind of normal life for myself and moving on from this situation I'd created? Then again if I ran…I'd just be a coward who couldn't fix anything.

"You know the last thing I said to him? I called him a jerk." Molly remembered. "What if that's the last thing I said to him?"

Sam turned around. "Molly, we're going to find out what happened to your husband, I promise."

"We all do." Lance put in, and I saw the nasty look Dean gave him as the radio turned on and began to play.

"They call the rising sun." It played.

Dean looked at Sam. "Did you?"

"No," Sam replied shaking his head.

"Great…ghost radio." I told them with a sigh.

Dean nodded in agreement with me. "I was afraid you'd say that."

I took a deep breath and looked at the radio, the boys leaving it on. This meant that the ghost was near and we had pissed it off and what else was new? It was just another ghost that was going to try to kill us and we had to figure out how to get it before it got us. The wheels were already turning in Kate's head and I wished that I had all of the answers right now so that I could stop this.

"This song…" Molly began but she trailed off.

Dean glanced at her and then back at the road. "What?"

"It was playing when we crashed," she replied, and we all exchanged nervous looks.

The frequency modulated and suddenly there was a hoarse man's voice saying, "She's mine. She's mine. She's mine."

"What is that?" Molly asked as.

"Hold on!" Dean told us, and sped through the man, black mist going everywhere.

Molly was freaking out. "What the…what the Hell just happened?"

"Don't worry, Molly, everything is gonna be all right." Kate told her calmly without skipping a beat.

However, the engine sputtered and I sighed—it was just our luck to now have the car crap out on us. We needed to find a place to get more information about the ghost and we needed to find it now. I didn't want anyone to die right now, and it would make me feel a little better about myself these days if I just helped to save someone.

"Spoke a little too soon, Kate." Dean said and we pulled over, trying to get the car to start, but it wouldn't. "I don't think he's gonna let her leave."

I got out of the car and looked up at the night sky and closed my eyes—we'd get through this. We would—we'd be fine. The others got out of the car too, and I walked into the street as Dean went to the back of the car and looked for weapons, and Molly started to freak out.

Sam looked at her. "Molly, listen to me!"

"Just stay away!" She told him.

"It wasn't a coincidence we found you, all right?" Kate asked her.

"What are you talking about?" Molly asked him, turning around a little as Lance and Dean walked towards her, Dean staying ahead of Lance.

"We weren't out here cruising for chicks when we found you, sister. We were hunting." Dean told her, walking up to Sam on the road.

Molly made a face. "Hunting for what?"

"Ghosts," I answered as Sam tried to find the words to say and Dean went back to the car, Kate helping him with the weapons.

"D—D—Don't…sugarcoat it for her." Sam told me.

"You're nuts." Molly replied quickly.

I nodded a little actually because I believed that—I mean we hunted things that were very real but _I_ was nuts. I needed to focus on this hunt though, so I took a few more steps towards them and then I smiled at her. I was going to talk to her when Lance cut in and for once since he'd joined us I was _actually_ annoyed with him.

"Really?" Lance asked her.

"About as nuts as a vanishing guy with his guts spilling out," Dean told her, cutting in to not let Lance finish what he was doing. "You know what you saw."

"We think his name is Jonah Greeley. He was a local farmer that died 15 years ago on this highway." Sam tried to explain, as she avoided eye contact.

Molly shook her head. "Just stop."

"One night a year, on the anniversary of his death, he haunts this highway." Kate continued gently.

"That's why we're here, Molly—to stop him." Sam told her nodding.

"Now, I suppose this ghost made my car disappear too." Molly asked us.

"Crazier things have happened. Huh?" Dean asked, hitting Sam playfully.

I smiled a little because honestly crazier things _had_ happened to us—this was just another ghost case. The ghost cases were actually my favorite because most of them were _really_ straight forward and they were easier to get through without casualties than demon hunts. That and demons seemed to be that area for us that we were all trying to avoid given my biological father was one.

Molly backed away a little. "You know what? I'm all filled up on crazy. I'm gonna go get the cops myself."

"I don't mean to sound harsh, but I don't think you're gonna get very far." Dean told her as she walked away.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Molly asked him, a little scared of what he'd said.

Dean gave her a look. "It means plan 'A' was to get you out of here, and obviously that didn't go over well with, uh, farmer roadkill."

"Molly, were telling the truth. Greeley's not going to let you leave this highway." Sam told her calmly, looking at her with concern.

Molly's eyes welled up with tears. "You're serious about this, aren't you?"

"Deadly," Dean replied with a straight, unemotional look on his face.

"Every night Greeley finds someone to punish for his death." Sam told her, his face full of care and sorrow. "Tonight that person is you."

"Why me? I didn't do anything." Molly protested quickly.

I shook my head. "Doesn't matter, Molly. Some spirits only see what they want to see."

I tried to smile at her, but it came out as more of a sad smile and Dean nudged me softly because he'd caught it. We were supposed to be _appealing_ to her—not dragging in any of our baggage to hinder our progress. Normally I could focus on a hunt just fine and come back to the emotional stuff later but…oh, who was I kidding? I was as emotional as they came, which was why Dean and I fit so perfectly.

"So you're saying this, Greeley, he took my husband?" Molly asked, and we all stood there for a moment in silence. "Oh, God…"

"We're gonna help, all right?" Sam told her. "But first you gotta help us."

Molly looked at him. "Help you? How?"

"Take us to where you saw him." Lance replied and Molly nodded and led us into the forest, all of us looking around.

"Must have been his hunting cabin," Dean told us, his flashlight going over things. "Seems like a real sweet guy."

He started to walk off and I followed him because as much as I cared for everyone else, I didn't want Dean getting into any trouble. Least I could do at this point was be his back-up for whatever it was that he needed me for. He glanced at me and then he looked back to where he was looking and I put my hands in my pockets, nodding and looking around the forest with my own flashlight.

"No gravestones or headmarkers outside." Sam told us, coming in.

"You're looking for Greeley's grave?" Molly asked us.

Sam nodded at her. "Yeah."

"Why?" She asked him.

"So we can dig up his bones and salt them and burn them." Dean replied nonchalantly.

"Sure," Molly told us. "Naturally…"

I smiled at her—it was really nice to know that she was accepting this even though she still thought we were crazy. Actually to _chose_ this line of work we were _incredibly_ crazy, but we did it because it was the right thing to do.

"It's a way to get rid of a spirit." Sam explained to her.

Molly looked at him. "And that'll save David?"

Lance stepped in. "It should help both of you if there's a corpse to be found."

"So how do we find it?" Molly asked him.

"We don't really know. After he died, his wife claimed the body and no one heard from her after that, so the best guess is she brought it back here. But they have a thousand acres. He could be buried anywhere on 'em." Sam explained to her.

"This is really what you guys do." Molly said, looking at us. "You're like ghostbusters or something."

"Yeah, minus the jumpsuits. Look, this conversation is fascinating and all, but this guy only haunts this highway once a year and we only have until sunup to wrap this thing up, so let's say we move it along, okay? Great." Dean said, and walked past us.

I nodded as he walked past us and I just kind of smiled and turned to follow him quickly and I took a deep breath. I knew it wasn't time to push him with questions and talking—I was really letting _him_ take the lead on everything. Talking, arguing, researching, hunting…I just felt like he needed someone in his corner.

"Hey, you wanna talk about it?" I asked him. "I mean you're really snappy right now, is there anything I can do for you?"

Dean turned to me. "We need to find the body—we're crunching time."

"That doesn't mean you can be mean to her—she's been through a lot." I told him. "I understand what she's going through, I mean David means everything to her just like…never mind."

"You mean like I mean everything to you?" Dean asked me.

I put my hands in the air. "You know what? Never mind. I'm not going to do a care and share right now Dean…we're crunching time just like you said."

Dean opened his mouth to say something to me but Molly started screaming so we hurried to her and Dean pointed the gun at Greeley. He was definitely in the mood for a hunt to take out some of his emotions, and I understood it—I wished _I_ was as angry as he was but I was just upset at myself.

"Whoops," Dean said, and shot the rock salt at him, and he disappeared, Molly getting up and Sam and Kate coming running as I muttered, 'hot', Lance laughing a little as he heard me.

"Hey! Are you all right?" Sam asked Molly.

Molly looked at him. "That son of a bitch came out of nowhere—"

"—just take it easy, all right? You're going to see David again. You will." Sam assured her as we all looked around to figure out where to go to next or if Greeley would show up again.

"Hey!" Dean said pointing his flashlight on the ground as we all looked at him. "Follow the creepy brick road."

I nodded at that and as Sam offered for Molly to go ahead, Dean and I walked in front, Lance and Kate walking together. We were silent for a moment or two and then I decided to try and talk to him again—I felt like I might be stepping on toes, but at the same time, I just wanted to talk to him.

"This is a weird hunt." I told Dean. "I mean we deal with spirits all the time, but this is—maybe it's the forest."

Dean shrugged at me. "We'll do what we always do—get rid of the spirit and then be on our way."

"Why is it you aren't taking any pleasure whatsoever in this hunt? You like hunts." I reminded him.

"I'm just not in this one," he admitted to me with a shrug.

I nodded at that and decided I was done trying to make small talk—Dean didn't want to talk and I didn't want to force him into it. I mean I wanted things with us to be okay, but three weeks wasn't enough time to make that happen—it was just enough time to make us all tolerant of each other. We were both dealing with the pain that was still lingering and if he needed more time, than he needed more time and nodding at that I looked up at an old, rickety house and I shuddered.

"You know, just once I'd like to round the corner and see a nice house." I said sighing.

"Me too," he agreed with a gentle nod and we all went inside.

It was time to check inside the house for some clues and so we were all going to split up and I was going to let _them_ pick teams. I was kind of annoyed that I was just how Victoria had described me as once, but at the same time I knew I had a reason to be like this now. It wasn't my place anymore and I had to accept it—even if I wanted to take charge this time around.

"Any headstones outside?" Sam asked us.

"Yeah, right—is it ever that easy?" Dean replied.

Sam sighed loudly. "I guess not."

"You two check upstairs, see if there are any notes or records that say where he's buried, I'll just check down here." Dean explained to Sam and Molly.

"Kate and I will check more outside. You settle that man of yours." Lance replied, and went outside to look around some more as Kate gave us a thumbs up.

I sighed and went into the kitchen, looking around and then standing there, looking at Dean. I wanted to ask him if he wanted to talk but that would be forcing—no forcing, Lana. So I went back to rummaging and Dean sighed loudly which made me stop and look at him hopefully but when he opened his mouth to say something he changed his mind and closed it again. That had been happening a lot with us lately and by now I was rather used to the hope and then crushing disappointment that followed the action.

"Do you think the records are in the kitchen or the living room?" I asked him.

He nodded slowly and then shook his head. "They could be anywhere."

"Well as long as we don't give up, we'll find what we need to find." I explained to him.

"Are you talking about the hunt or us?" Dean asked me, and when I didn't answer he nodded slowly and headed for the kitchen. "There's nothing here."

I stood in the living room and I swallowed, shaking my head as he walked up the stairs, stopping once, but deciding against whatever he was going to say, and continuing up. I heard some crashing, but I stayed where I was—they could handle it. So I walked outside, and Lance looked at me, nodding and then taking a breath, Kate to me first but Lance speaking up first.

"I can't find anything—are you okay, Lan-Bon?" Lance asked as he stood next to me.

I shrugged and put my hands in my pockets. "I'm about as good as can be expected right now…he's still so mad."

"He's not just going to give up, Lan-Bon." Lance told me. "I mean you broke him, but as much as he can't forgive and forget here, you're giving him his space and yet still showing that you're interested so you just have to wait for him to want to try again."

"I know that, I just—the waiting is _killing _me right now," I explained to them. "I know I have no right to be upset and I don't even feel sorry for myself, I just feel angry because I made a really _bad _decision and I can't fix it. Factor in that this case is weird and we're all just on edge so…I'm going to handle it."

"Of you will," Kate said smiling. "Look, he's just upset because you made his walls come down and he wants to know everything about you. Factor in also that he never thought he could give you a good life and maybe part of him is looking for an 'out'…but the rest of him won't let him take it."

Lance nodded at me in agreement with Kate and I was going to say something else but we both looked up as Sam and Dean came out holding a corpse. Molly was behind them and so they came and explained to us that it was Greeley's wife and we dug a grave for her and put her body in. We were going to salt and burn her bones so that she could be at rest too, and I felt bad for her—poor restless spirits.

"So, if you manage to put Greeley to rest too…what happens to them?" Molly asked as we dug a little more.

"Lady, the answer is way beyond our pay grade." Dean replied, shoveling more dirt.

Molly gave him a look. "You hunt these things, but you don't know what happens to them?"

"They never come back. That's all that matters." Dean told her, and walked away and I sighed.

"When they let go of whatever is keeping them here, they just go. We really don't know what happens to them." I replied to her and I smiled. "Sam and I like to believe that they go to a better place, but it's hard to tell. No one really knows for certain."

"What happens when you salt and burn their bones?" She inquired.

"Um…well, Dad used to say that is was like, death for ghosts but…we still don't know." Sam admitted, Molly kneeling down. "Guess that's why we all hold onto life so hard…even the dead."

I looked down and ran my fingers along my stomach. "Yeah…"

"I guess we're all scared of the unknown." Kate continued as she looked at Molly softly.

I hadn't ever really given it a _lot_ of thought, but when they salted and burned the bones I had to pause and think about it. I really believed that when ghosts were laid to rest, their souls were finally judged and then they either went to Heaven, or they went to Hell. Hopefully Greeley's wife was going to Heaven—hopefully the majority of the tragic souls went to Heaven when they were avenged.

"The only thing I'm scared of is losing David." Molly told us, and we all stopped to look at her. "I have to see him again. I have to."

I nodded, knowing how she felt, and then we went inside and Dean sat in a chair looking out the window, Sam and Kate standing up as Lance sat with Molly at the table, both of them looking over photos. Dean reached out and held my hand as I stood next to the chair he was in, and he tugged on my hand a little. I sat on his lap and he wrapped his arms around me, resting his chin on my head and hugging me to him as I rested my head on his chest and smiled a little—I liked this.

"I think we should tell her about her husband." Kate told us. "Sam and I wanted to from the beginning."

Dean shook his head. "We can't."

"Dean, it's cruel, letting her pine for him like this." Sam explained to him. "I don't like keeping her in the dark."

"It's for her own good," Dean replied with little emotion and I kissed his neck swiftly as he shifted to get up, and got off of him, leaning against the wall. "I know you feel guilty, all right, but let's stick to the plan. Let's get her out of here, and then we'll tell her."

"Tell me what?" Molly asked, Lance standing behind her as she looked at us. "What aren't you telling me?" She asked as Dean licked his lips and looked at the ground and Kate, Sam and I swallowed, Lance putting his hands in his pockets. "It's about David, isn't it? You know what happened to him."

Sam took a breath. "Molly—"

"—Sam, don't." Dean told him sternly.

"Don't what? Don't tell me, because I'll mess up your hunt?" She asked, coming towards us. "You don't care about me _or_ my husband."

"That's not true." Kate said hurriedly.

Molly nodded slowly. "Then whatever it is, tell me, please."

We all swallowed and exchanged looks, looking for the words to say because she needed to know. Sam was about to say something but then **House of the Rising Sun** began to play again, and Molly got frightened. Actually, we _all_ got frightened because that meant that Greeley was coming and that we were all in trouble here.

"He's coming," Molly told us softly.

"Stay with her," Dean told us, both he and Lance heading to the radio.

Molly went over to the window as I watched Lance and Dean at the radio and suddenly I shivered. I looked over towards Molly and saw Sam's nervous face as he shivered too, Kate shaking her head. We broke eye contact when the window broke, and Molly was dragged through the window, which was making our job _that_ much harder. Kate started to make angry noises and I knew how she felt—off of her game.

"Dean! He's got Molly!" Sam cried, and we all jumped out the window after them, running and looking for her with our flashlights.

"This guy is persistent." Dean said as we went back into the house.

Kate nodded at that. "We gotta find Molly."

"We gotta find Greeley's bones." Dean persisted. "And uh, no pressure, or anything, but we've got less than two hours before sunrise."

"Then we should split up." I replied, and Lance picked up the photos and then he pointed to the book.

"Look," he said, and Sam went over and they both got looks on their faces.

Dean looked at us. "What?"

"February 6, 1992." Lance replied.

"I asked Sam." Dean told him hostilely.

I took a deep breath and shook my head as Lance opened his mouth again because I didn't want him to push Dean. Dean had enough to deal with and this wasn't a contest—things needed to be done and we were running out of time here. This was our only shot and Lance was provoking Dean for no good reason and he had to stop.

"Lance, just don't," I told him and looked at Sam. "What is it, Sammy?"

"It was two weeks before the accident, and it looks like the hunting cabin, but there's a tree in front of it." Sam explained to us and he sighed, Kate's eyes lighting up. "I should have thought of it."

Dean and I were both confused. "What?"

"It's a country custom, planting a tree as a grave marker." Kate told us and Dean and I both got looks on our faces—I was surprised and Dean thought Sam and Kate were weird.

"You're like a walking encyclopedia of weirdness—both of you. You were meant to find each other, that's for sure." Dean said, leaving the room, Lance following close behind as Sam sighed and put the book down.

"Yeah, I know," Sam told him, kissing Kate swiftly and then we hurried for the cabin.

When we got to the hunting cabin, Dean, Kate and I went inside and Lance stayed with Sam to dig up Greeley's bones. When we entered the cabin, Greeley was cutting into Molly and Dean immediately shot Greeley in the head and Molly was relieved to see us.

"Oh thank God!" She exclaimed.

"Call me Dean," he told her with a smile, but Greeley appeared and used his telekinesis to cut Dean's cheek. "This guy's really pissing me off."

I made a fireball as Greeley sent Dean up against the wall. "Don't touch him!"

The fireball made him dematerialize for a moment, but he showed back up as Dean called out to Sam to hurry up and Greeley went for me. It was better he go for me than for Dean, and I closed my eyes as I was sent up against the wall and Greeley got himself a knife. The spirit vanished as he came towards me, me catching my breath from being winded, and when that was done, we all walked back to the car.

"Oh, baby, it's been a long night," he said to the car, tossing his things in.

I took a hold of his jacket and looked over his cut. "That looks like it hurts, are you okay?"

"Lanni, I'm fine." He told me.

"You've been tossed around the last few times." I replied, leaning into him. "I'm sorry…I'm _really_ sorry."

Dean stroked my hair. "Just get in the car."

The order wasn't mean, it was soft, and I nodded slowly and let go of him, getting into the car and sitting next to Lance since he sat in the middle. We drove to Molly and David's house, me watching her in sadness as it all came full circle for her. She had looked happy and confused, and now she was hurt and confused.

"That's not…it can't be." She said, and I started to get sad as Dean, Kate, Lance and Sam looked at each other. "What's happening? Who is that?"

"That's David's wife." Sam told her after a pause as she looked at us. "I'm sorry, Molly. 15 years ago, you and your husband hit Jonah Greeley with your car. David survived."

Molly shook her head slowly. "What are you saying?"

"We're saying there isn't just one spirit haunting Highway 41. There are two." Dean spoke up. "Jonah Greeley and you."

"For the past 15 years, one night a year you've been appearing on that highway." Sam explained to her.

"No, that's not possible. It was our anniversary…February 22nd…" She was saying.

"1992." Sam finished for her.

Molly nodded at that. "Yes."

"Molly, it's 2007." I told her calmly.

"Oh, God…" Molly said slowly, "and Greeley?"

"Each year he punishes someone for his death—uh, chasing them. Torturing them…and each year, that somebody is you." Sam explained to her.

I smiled sadly at that and wiped a tear away as Dean glanced at me and then looked back at Molly. She was trying to comprehend what we saying and though deep down she believed it, she needed more answers. If she didn't get more answers, then she wouldn't be able to let herself move on and that was what we were here for.

"But I don't remember any of it," Molly protested to us.

"Because you couldn't see the truth, Molly," Kate told her.

"So that's why he won't, let me off the highway…because I…I killed him. I killed us both." Molly said and then she sat out on the front sidewalk. "Why not tell me when you first saw me? Why wait until now?"

Kate smiled at her sadly. "You wouldn't have believed us."

"And you needed me for bait," she shot at Lance and Dean.

"Well, we needed you." Sam told her.

It was true—she was our bait and without her we never would have been able to get Greeley. At the same time, laying _her_ ghost to rest was the other part of our job and this was that part of it. We had to convince her to let go, and to move on because it was _her_ time to go and she needed to understand that.

"David," she said, forlorn and desperate.

I swallowed and bit my lip. "Molly, we brought you here so that you could move on."

"No," Molly replied, standing up. "I have to tell him."

"Tell him what?" Sam asked her. "That you love him? That you're sorry? Molly, he already knows that."

I wiped away a tear as she looked at us, so distraught. "If you want to go in there, we're not going to stop you."

"But you are going to freak him right out…for life." Dean cut in, looking at her as she looked at him, ready to cry.

"David's already said his goodbyes, Molly. Now it's _your_ turn." Sam said after we all gave Dean looks. "This is _your_ unfinished business."

Molly nodded slowly at that and Dean nodded too, knowing that his job here was complete and he was going to let Sam and Kate take over. They had it firmly under control and I let the words sink in that Dean had said because I loved him very much and I knew that on some level, that was really how he felt about it.

"What am I supposed to do?" Molly asked sadly.

"Just…let go. Of David. Of everything. If you do that, we think you'll move on." Sam explained to her softly, smiling a little.

Molly tried to keep the tears back. "But you don't know where?"

"No, but Molly, you don't belong here. Haven't you suffered long enough?" I asked her, and Molly nodded so I smiled at her to let her know that I cared.

"It's time. It's time to go." Kate told her.

She nodded and cried all of us giving her glances as she walked out a little ways as the sun rose. She started to glow brightly and we watched as she disappeared into a bright light, her spirit moving on. I hoped so hard that she had just gone to Heaven because she deserved to be at peace and be in a place of warmth and love…she really did.

"I guess she wasn't so bad…for a ghost. You really think she's going to a better place?" Dean asked us.

"I hope so," Kate, Sam and I said together.

Dean nodded slowly. "I guess we'll never really know. Not unless we take the plunge ourselves, huh?"

"Doesn't really matter, Dean," Sam told him. "Hope's kind of the whole point."

"All right, Haley Joel." Dean said, patting his shoulder. "Let's hit the road and get him back home."

Sam and I looked one last time at where Molly had left, and then we got into the car, all of us silent until we got to the airport. Dean and Sam stayed in the car as I walked Lance in and I smiled at him as he stood there, ready to board his flight. Kate was with the boys talking it up and flirting with Sam and I just needed to make sure that Lance got on his flight and made it home safe and sound.

"Ask for extra peanuts and hit on the cute flight attendants." I told him. "And hey…thanks for all of the help."

Lance smiled at me and then hugged me quickly and let go. "Stay safe and don't hurt that man or yours _too _badly, all right?"

"Promise," I told him with a sad smile and a nod.

He nodded too and I watched him go through the security gate, heading straight back to the Impala. When we got to the motel room Sam and Kate went out to get food and Dean and I found ourselves very much alone with each other. I sat on the bed and ran my fingers along the mattress, looking at me feet and then up at Dean as he spoke.

"I don't know where we stand anymore, Lanni," he told me.

I nodded slowly. "I know what you mean. I actually wondered why I was still here you know. I feel like lying to you made us have to start all over and if I go then you get to get back on track, and I get to pick up the pieces I made. On the other hand, I'd be a coward if I walked away so it's kind of _your_ decision I think."

"Lanni I'm hurt, but…I _don't_ want you to leave." Dean explained to me with a shrug. "It's going to take us a while to get back to a more loving place with each other, but I'm not just throwing in the towel because I _know_ you're sorry, and I _know_ you love me. It's just a _really_ hard thing to get past. You know how I feel about honesty and I just…I'm in this far too deep and so are you. Baby, you deserve a life."

"All I want is a life with you," I said slowly, shrugging and sitting up. "That's the only big secret I had, I promise you. I know right now it doesn't mean much since you said no more secrets, but now you know everything and from here on out you'll always know everything."

"It's a start…" He said, sitting down next to me.

For a moment we just sat there and then he put his arm around me because neither of us wanted it to be like this at all. He kissed my temple and stroked my hair and held me to him and I knew he was just trying to show me that he wanted to try and he wanted it to be fixed. That was good because I wanted the exact same thing, so for now, things between us were at least a bit patched up.

"Are you all right, Lanni?" He asked me and smiled a little when I raised my eyebrows. "You don't ever talk about being buried."

I nodded slowly. "That's because I don't want to. It was hard and I have been talking to someone about it and I think…I think I'll get better. You stuck by me all the way through it and I just…I'm 'normal', Dean. I know you believe that I'm not my father, but I just think that if we focus on everything in the now, we can fix this."

"We can, we have the time and the want," Dean said with a nod. "Maybe an actual first date should be in order? We should actually take the time out for us and do something that we'll always remember. I always regret not romancing you properly, you know? I just want you and I to…I can't lose you."

"You'll never lose me," I promised him, kissing him tenderly and smiling when he kissed me back lovingly. "I promise you…we could date. Like for real this time if you want to."

"Then that's our new beginning." Dean told me with a nod. "No more secrets…because this is the last chance I'm willing to give you on that front. Still, hey…"

"What?" I asked softly.

He took a deep breath. "If you were in Molly's place, would you have gone in the house? I mean if we had been married and you had died…would you have come in to talk to me?"

"Since you're a hunter and you're used to ghosts…I probably would have." I told him with a nod. "I know that isn't the answer you want, but we're being truthful and I would have haunted your ass for a minute or two to tell you I love you and given you a chance to say goodbye."

**Note: So things seem to be getting a _little_ better, huh? This was just a little over 19 pages but the next one is emotional again and then things get happier for a bit and then well…we have to have the finale, now don't we? Feedback is always appreciated!**


	23. Can't Fight This Feeling

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay this chapter is just pretty much…you guys will understand what the next chapter is by the end because you're all geniuses.**

**There is also smut in this chapter and it's a little heavier than the others.**

**WARNINGS: Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Dean's POV**

I was incredibly serious about having a real first date and I was nervous about it, but it seemed like the right thing to do. She was the right choice to make. While I had been giving her a hard time about her father really being a demon, I loved Lana Meckenzie and I was having a really hard time picturing a life without her in it. So, it seemed like to me, we needed a new beginning because I'd had a _lot_ of time to think and I wanted her to know that I knew who she was and she wasn't evil.

I wished that she had been able to come clean with me, but in the long run I also knew that it was best I learn this way. All this time, I had been able to get to know her and what she stood for and fall in love with her and while it _had_ felt like a betrayal, I had done worse and I didn't want her to go anywhere. I depended far too much on her and I knew that Sam and Kate were happy to have this time to themselves as well…maybe they'd finally consummate something.

While I liked to tease them a lot, I thought that Kate was a good person who valued family and she cared about my brother. She thought that he was this great guy—which he was—and she wanted to protect him and be in his corner and I was all for that, let me tell you. Sam needed a good girl in his life and while she was a hunter and she reminded me a lot of myself, I approved whole-heartedly about the pairing.

In order to show Lana that I was serious about this, I went with my nicest pair of jeans and her favorite button up of mine, over a t-shirt. That style seemed to drive her crazy and since I wanted that affect, I smiled in the mirror and mussed my hair a little, pulling on the leather jacket and then walking out of the motel bathroom door and smiling as I saw Lana there. She knew how to make jeans and a sweater look downright sexy.

Her hair was half up and half down, bangs pinned and yet a little loose, and she was wearing a sweater with a braided print on it, with large cuffs and a cowl neck. She was wearing a necklace I'd bought her and she could tell I was at a loss for words and she blushed, but walked up to me, which was when I noticed that on top of the form fitting jeans, she was wearing heeled boots—they were small heels, but heels none the same.

"Someone looks incredible," I told her, smiling.

She shrugged a bit like it was nothing. "I'm going on a date with Dean Winchester—I had to step it up a notch."

"Well, this is already the best date I've ever been on," I told her, reaching out to cup her face. "Sure you want to…go out…?"

"Oh, you're not getting out of this by a long shot!" She responded, kissing me and then pulling back just when I wanted more. "We are going on an actual date and I know just the way to make it perfect."

"I believe you," I told her honestly with a nod.

With a big grin on her face, Lana took my hand and told me that Sam and Kate were already out to dinner. I was alright with having Lana all to myself for the night and I opened up her door for her to the passenger seat of the Impala. Then I got in and drove us to the exact place that Lana told me to go to: a beach.

xx

**Sam's POV**

I was surprised when my brother had suggested actually dating Lana, but at the same time it was bound to happen eventually. He loved her way too much and I thought that maybe his grand gesture meant I should make one of my own considering how I felt about Kate. So, I had asked her out on a real date too since we were taking a little break and she had been ecstatic to accept, which just made me all the happier.

Dressing up a bit, I smiled when Kate showed up in a skirt and a blouse, her red hair straight and pinned a little, and I took her out to dinner. We were at a restaurant near the motel and I didn't know if we were going to get back to the motel first or if Dean and Lana were at this point. It was almost like a race to the finish only I wasn't in the 'race' because I was more interested in just spending time with Kate with or without sex.

As much as we both wanted it.

"So, you're a romantic?" Kate teased as she looked over the menu, tapping her heels on the floor nervously. "I never knew…"

I rolled my eyes as she winked at me. "Yeah, you did…"

"It's pretty fantastic that you are," Kate said with a smile. "I warn you: this is the farthest I've ever gotten with a man before okay? Well…what I mean is that normally I'm running and I don't want to run from you, Sammy. I want to be right here. When I thought I'd lost you before I almost broke and I just…I need you."

"You have no idea how happy that makes me," I admitted with a grin on my face.

She really didn't, because there was just something about Kate that made me feel like everything was going to be alright—that everything was as it should be. Since Jessica had died, I'd never felt this way about anyone before and Kate was part of the family: she was the girl that I wanted to be with. I had no reason not to trust her with my life and my heart and I wanted to dive right in…seemed like she wanted to dive right in too.

"I need you too," I told her, smiling up at the waiter when he got there. "I can't think of anything better than this right here with you. We'll have the steak with potatoes on the side, a red sangria for the beautiful woman across from me, and I'll have the house margarita with no salt on the rim."

Kate wiggled her eyebrows at me. "You are the sexiest man I know, Sam Winchester."

"That is quite a compliment, Kate Newman," I said chuckling as the waiter nodded and then went to give the order to the cook.

"Well, I wouldn't give it to just anyone," Kate responded with a bright smile.

It was really nice to see her so bright and happy like this and I reached out my hand palm up, Kate reaching out and resting her hand in mine. As her thumb stroked my hand I really was thinking about how this was about as good as it was going to get to for me and I knew that she was the one.

"After dinner I have a surprise for you," Kate told me with a nod, picking up her drink with her other hand and sipping it.

xx

**Lana's POV**

"Is it just me or are you enjoying yourself, Dean?" I asked him with a smile on my face.

Dean chuckled and nodded. "I'm having a really great time, actually."

"Good," I told him nodding too.

I had brought him to the beach with a nice thick blanket and thermoses, both of us sitting on it and talking about things. We'd been acting like it was an actual first date it was fun with the night sky and the waves crashing on the shore and the moon high in the sky and I wanted this to stay like this forever. Dean and I were in a really good place and as long as we kept going like this, we should be perfectly fine and we should get right back on track with each other.

"So, other than a picnic dinner—which I am actually thoroughly enjoying—what else you do have planned?" Dean asked me with a broad smile on his face. "Whisking me off somewhere else?"

I shook my head and wiggled my eyebrows. "No, the next bit of it all also takes place right here, and I think you'll enjoy it."

That said, I picked up the forkful of apple pie and held it up to Dean's mouth, both of us making eye contact as his mouth covered the fork and he ate it. Honestly, I never thought we'd be the kind of couple that fed each other, but there was a time and a place for it and Dean enjoyed dipping his finger in things and letting me suck it off, but for entirely filthy purposes, I assure you. Personally, as far as sex was concerned, I had a feeling that Dean liked that he'd practically molded me to what he liked/wanted.

Everything I knew was what turned _him_ on.

Not that it hadn't awakened me to what it was that I liked and wanted too, and I certainly had grown into my sexuality since I'd met him, but it made me smile to think about it. Even though I had been completely and utterly inexperienced, Dean Winchester loved me and at every turn he was patient with me and he'd taught me so much and I'd learned a bit on my own. Not to mention that 'practice makes perfect'. Plus as he dipped his finger in the caramel drizzle I'd packed in case he wanted it on his pie or in case I wanted to dip the apple slices in it, I smirked.

His finger was now in front of my face and making eye contact, I let my mouth cover it, sucking off the caramel and letting my tongue swirl around a little. This had been his plan all along and I knew that, but I had wanted to eat more and then do something nice and spontaneous so that he would always remember this—I mean, I was sure that he'd had sex on the first date on the majority of his first dates and I wanted to do something else first. Moaning gently, Dean watched me intently as I slowly let his finger go, about to go in for the kill when I pushed his hand away.

"I don't want caramel in my hair," I told him, but as he started to give me his perfect 'bitch' face, I closed the distance between him and pressed my lips to his.

I was always in the mood to play with Dean and I was more than happy to tease him just a little bit because I would follow through eventually. So, I let my hand go down to the bulge forming in his pants, unfastening them as Dean wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close, wanting this. I let my hand slip into his pants and rubbed him through his boxers, Dean moaning into my mouth and moving his hips up against my hand so I could effectively pay attention to the entire area there.

"Clothes off," I commanded, pulling my shirt off and tossing it onto the blanket we were sitting on.

Dean wiggled his eyebrows. "Right here on this blanket?"

"Baby," I said as I applied a little more pressure to him, Dean closing his eyes and nodding as he moaned, "clothes…off…"

He didn't have to be told a third time—no, Dean Winchester undressed himself and I got my clothes off too, moaning into his mouth as his thumb ran over the peak of my breast. Dean knew every place on my body to tease and please, so he let his mouth trail down my chest, taking my right nipple into his mouth and sucking, nipping at it a little, which was making me too wet too soon. So, I gripped his hair and tugged a little bit harder than normally, Dean turned on by it and smirking, sitting up straight with me.

"In the water," I commanded again, standing up, Dean taking my hand.

"No, no," Dean said shaking his head, hand still holding mine. "Cold water is going to ruin what is quickly becoming a rather exquisite hard on."

I laughed and rolled my eyes, though I blushed. "I promise I'll get you all good and hard again after, okay?"

"That better be a promise that you keep," Dean teased, pointing his finger at me sternly. "Fine…"

Standing up, he pulled my naked body to his, making sure I could feel him nice and ready between my legs before we both went towards the water. It seemed like something fun and I'd never done it before, so we raced to the water's edge hand in hand and jumped on in, letting the waves crash into us, going over our heads. I let the water's feel sink in a moment before I surfaced, Dean coming up just shortly after as I pushed my hair back and wiped the water from my eyes to see clearly.

"Son of a bitch, it's freezing in here!" Dean said, his teeth chattering.

I laughed and nodding, shivering a little. "It is…but we can warm up…"

Dean rolled his eyes and splashed me, both of us splashing a little before we were kissing, getting out of the cold water and bypassing the blanket for the car. I had had a feeling that we wouldn't be making it back to the motel to do this and that was alright because I had promised Kate that she and Sam could finally scratch that itch without Dean and I there. Feeling adventurous and in need of being in control this time around, I pressed Dean's wet, naked body to the car and he moaned happily.

"Jesus, Lanni," he breathed out, hands wandering along my body as his mouth did the same. "Was this your plan all along?"

I nodded and opened up the door to the backseat, pushing him in. "Mmhmm…"

He chuckled and lay on his back, me climbing in on top of him and shutting the door behind me. Our lips pressed together and then I nipped at his lips and his jaw and started to kiss down his body, stopping his hands as he went to take control as my tongue flickered over his hard member. He'd taught me this and I could do it and take it to a whole other level if he just let me instead of second guessing for my sake. It was sweet and gentlemanly of him, but right now I didn't want to be a lady and I wanted him to lay here and take it until it was his turn to have control.

"Lanni…" Dean tried, eyes blazing into mine with lust as I pinned his hands above his head and shook my head. "…Jesus…"

I smiled and let my wet skin rub against his. "It is not your turn…"

That being said, I let my mouth cover the tip of the length of him, flicking my tongue across the slit and watching as Dean made eye contract briefly and then his head lulled back. Smiling, I worked him with my mouth, letting my hands slide down his body to his sac, massaging as I moaned to let him know that this was okay for me. I could feel it thicken and he signaled that he was close so I laid on top of his body and let his tongue slip into my mouth as we kissed, him protesting as I grasped him with my hand and brought him over the edge as my nail played with his slit.

Not letting me even start to internally praise myself for the performance, Dean flipped us over, my back now firmly against the leather seats in the back. He let his mouth wander as mine had, down my body, paying special attention to my chest and then letting his tongue skim between my legs. Dean was the far more experienced one here and soon I was writhing under his touch, Dean bringing me over the edge and then barely letting me get a hold of the world again before I felt his tip teasing me.

"I love you…" I managed panting.

Dean nodded and tugged on my bottom lip with his teeth. "I love you too…"

He pushed in, in one hard thrust, filling me up and sucking on my neck as I cried out. The two of us had needed to reach a new place and this felt like it as I wrapped my legs around his waist to give him easier access to me. Our cries and moans filled up the car and had anyone else been there, they would have heard us and either felt embarrassed or called the cops on us or something. All I know was that climaxing _with_ Dean was an experience that I will never forget.

"How do you feel?" Dean asked, trying to catch his breath as his fingers slid through my hair, keeping my wet body close to his lovingly and protectively.

I smiled a little bit, trying to catch my breath as well. "Sticky…"

"God, I love you," Dean responded, laughing loudly, both of us making eye contact. "Best first date ever…"

"Yes, I agree," I said as I kissed him, hand slipping down to gently stroke his member even though we were both too tired to have anymore sex. "Best first date ever…"

xx

**Kate's POV**

The minute we were within feet of the motel door, Sam's lips were on mine, his hands straying along my frame. We'd both had sex before, just not with each other and the sexual tension between us had just been more and more and more. At one point, I just didn't think that I could take it and I knew we'd make it back to the motel before Lana and Dean because I knew what Lana's plan was and a naked Lana meant Dean would just take her in the backseat of the car.

So this was mine and Sammy's time.

I moaned into Sam's mouth as his hand firmly gripped my left breast, my back pressed hard against the motel door and for a moment I just wanted to hoist up my skirt and just have him get it over with right then and right there, but instead I let my hand reach back and grab the door knob. Smiling brightly as Sam let his teeth nip at the flesh of my neck, I got the door open and we were inside, Sam hurriedly kicking the door shut with his foot before pressing his lips to mine again and picking me up. It was easy for him and neither of us knew when Dean and Lana would be back.

Compared to Sam I was pretty petite, and I laughed as his large, rough hands went for the bottom of my shirt, neither of us thinking too much. Normally one of us would bring up Jessica or Cooper or I would freeze up because I was too close, but not this time. No, Sam wanted me and Jessica wasn't on his mind and as far as Cooper was concerned, I no longer cared about him because I had Sam Winchester. As for being too close…right now I could care less about being too close.

"Pants off," I managed, hands going to his belt and undoing it. "Now…"

I liked to be in control, but when Sam pushed my hands away and pushed my skirt down, I let him have the reins for a moment. The skirt fluttered to my ankles and he slipped his large hand down between my legs, stroking my folds and making me gasp and moan. Yes, I could most definitely get used to this. Pulling him back in for a kiss, I let my lips do the talking there as I pushed his pants off as well, feeling my back hit the mattress of the bed that we'd claimed.

Sam chuckled, it rumbling out of his throat and I moaned loudly for him as I felt his long, slender fingers invade. Laughing a little, Sam bit and kissed the hollow of my throat, his turn to moan as I slid my hand down his chest to the length of him, letting my fingers ghost over it. I smiled a little bit and gripped his hair with my free hand, tugging on it a little to let him know that I was entirely blissful right now.

"I guess what they say about tall men is true…" I whispered, wiggling my eyebrows as I started to stroke him, legs parted as he pushed his fingers in just a little bit deeper.

Sam nodded and kissed my mouth. "Was this the surprise?"

"No," I admitted, shaking my head and letting my thumb play with the tip. "This is just us…"

xx

**Dean's POV**

Honestly? Best sex ever. No one would ever believe me when I said that this beautiful virgin had come into my life and made me fall in love with her and we had the best sex. Not a single person. Still, that was exactly what had happened and while I knew that there were things that I had taught her, there were very obviously things that I had _not_ taught her that she knew how to do that drove me wild.

When Lana had taken over, I was a goner and the control that she had—that thing she did with her nail—it was just unbelievable. Our relationship wasn't just about sex, but that was going to be forever burned into my mind when I thought about our first date because what a first date that was. It didn't matter that I'd had sex on a first date before, because this was love and this was a girl that was doing these things to me with love behind it and not just trying to get off.

Then we'd held each other for a little bit, packed up, and then gotten dressed and come to the motel, where we both paused as we got to the door. Sam and Kate had _obviously_ wanted to have some sex, because we could _hear_ them through the motel _door_…way to go, Sammy. Lana just blushed and laughed, shaking her head, me taking her by the hand and kissing her fingertips before tugging her back to the Impala. I got into the driver's seat and pulled her in on my lap, Lana snuggling against me as I turned on the radio and Lana texted Kate to let them know that we were here when they were finished.

"I'm happy for them," Lana said as she kissed my chin and then my nose. "They deserve to be happy."

I nodded and smiled. "We're in direct agreement there, Lanni."

"Oh! I love this song!" She exclaimed suddenly.

We started singing loudly in the car, snuggling and rocking out a bit until Kate came out and motioned to the door. She was clothed now and she wasn't even blushing or anything—in fact she seemed ecstatic and made a joke about hoping I'd cleaned out the backseat or she was never sitting there again. I joked back with her as I locked up and we all went into the motel and locked up there too, getting into our respective beds and snuggling in with our significant others. Somehow, someway, Sam and I had done something right because we had two incredible women with us that loved us for who we were and we got to _keep_ them…I couldn't ask for anything more.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I lay in bed and I looked at Dean as he slept—we'd been talking more over the last little over a week and that was good. Our perfect first date had us both a lot happier with each other and we felt back on track with the flirting and the playfulness, both of us even over sharing to prove that we were telling each other everything. As good as that was going, Annie still hadn't been tracked down yet and neither had my mother. She hadn't talked to me in quite a long while actually, and I was _damn_ worried about her. Sam had even taken Kate and his laptop out to a nearby café for lunch to give Dean and I more time together and as sweet as the thought was, it wasn't going to help.

I got up and went out into the kitchen area, and started to make some coffee, Sam and Kate coming back in as the pot was pretty much made, and I sat at the table with him as he looked at the laptop and Kate grabbed a quick shower, his eyes on her the whole time. He wanted to follow her in and that made me smile, but then he looked at me and raised his eyebrows when he didn't see Dean anywhere and then he leaned on the counter and I shrugged. Sam nodded and I knew we didn't need words for it—Dean was still sleeping and I was in a mood that wasn't a sexual one while they were gone so nothing had happened between Dean and me.

"So coffee?" Sam asked me.

I nodded at him. "Yeah…I was thinking maybe pancakes too. Did you eat at the café or when Dean gets up can we go to a diner?"

"We didn't eat while we were out, though Kate really wanted to," Sam told me with a chuckle. "We did, however _bring _some cinnamon rolls we can use the microwave in here on."

I rolled my eyes and then just nodded and laughed, both of us looking at Dean as he strolled over to us. He had a large smile on his face so I assumed some kind of grand, dirty dream, me welcoming the kiss he placed to my mouth eagerly even though Sam was there too. That actual going on dates idea was a smash and he was standing there with a smile on his face as he reached out to stroke my hair.

"I've decided that today is a Lana and Dean day," Dean informed Sam. "When Kate gets her cute butt out of the shower I'm telling her that too."

I laughed a bit. "And what does it mean that it's a 'Lana and Dean' day, exactly?"

"It means that at any said moment, our word trumps theirs." Dean told me and he grinned. "If say I would like to take a tumble in the bed in the middle of say research if we get a case, they high tail it out of here and we get dibs on the bed—I smell coffee."

"Lan made it and I'm warming up cinnamon rolls," Sam explained to him, laughing at the notion of a 'Lana and Dean' day and yet nodding.

Dean made a face. "We should all just go to a diner—I want eggs."

"Then a diner it is," Sam replied with a nod. "First…I'm joining Kate in the shower."

"Make the quickie a quick, quickie!" Dean called out after him, chuckling a bit. "We're going to have to start getting separate motel rooms if they're going to keep having loud sex."

"Kate _is_ vocal…" I agreed with a nod.

Dean laughed and nodded. "I meant Sam and that's just awkward because he's my brother, but yeah, they both are."

"Need anything out of the car?" I asked as the sounds started up.

Dean was up and motioning me out the door, both of us hanging out in the car like we had nights before, singing and snuggling and laughing with each other. To passerbys we were probably the perfect couple and once Kate and Sam were out of the shower and dressed, we headed to a diner for breakfast, Dean cozying into the booth seat with me and smiling up at the waitress as she came to get our order. Sam had his arm around Kate on the other side and it was quite obvious to the poor girl that these incredibly attractive men were very much taken.

"What can I do you guys for?" She asked us, looking at Dean and grinning at him anyway as it was her job to be hospitable.

Dean smiled up at her. "I'll have your daily special, and the beautiful woman on my left will have your stack of pancakes and some coffee. Actually—coffee for the whole table. My brother will also have the special and his little misses will have the eggs Benedict with ham."

"Could I get a side of hash browns with mine?" Sam asked the waitress as Kate smiled and nodded approvingly.

"Absolutely—coming right up," she told us and then she left the table.

Sam raised his eyebrows but smiled at Dean, who glanced around the diner as I looked at him too. When he realized that Kate, Sam and I were looking at him, the smile was gone and he shrugged and looked at us.

"What?" He asked.

I shook my head. "Nothing you're just…bubbly this morning."

"I am not." Dean told me, rolling his eyes.

"No, no—you're kind of bubbly." Kate told him.

Dean took a deep breath. "Look, I—I've been a right pain in the ass lately and I realized that I have no right to be. I mean yeah, it was a big secret, but like we don't have secrets. We are hunters and Lanni can't just go blabbing something like that to everyone and their mother and while this is us and we should have known, now we do. Case closed. That and it's been the best sex ever since that date of ours. Like seriously, the two of us have a system now and I can't wait to just—"

"Dean Winchester!" I exclaimed, blushing furiously and smacking his arm lightly. "That isn't diner talk! I'm glad that you're so happy and I love the honesty between us lately, but such statements—"

"—are true," Dean said, leaning in and kissing me swiftly.

"It _was _the new arrangement," Kate said laughing merrily. "Glad you're having great sex, 'cause otherwise I'd feel more put out when Sam and I can't be in the motel room."

"True, and by the way, you two are very loud when you're going at it like wild animals…just in case you were wondering." I said, laughing a bit when Sam blushed.

He swallowed. "Are we really that loud?"

"Take it as a compliment," Kate told him, nipping at his jaw swiftly and looking in the sugar packet bowl for a good brand of sugar for her coffee.

"Anyway," I said, turning to Dean and smiling at him, "it was kinda hot that you knew exactly what I wanted for breakfast."

"I know you," Dean said simply—this was very true.

Dean chuckled and Sam smiled as Kate thanked Dean for making sure she got her pig for the day, all of us starting to talk about what we were going to do today when my phone went off. I got a look on my face as I recognized the ringtone and I picked up the phone quickly. The four of us really didn't have any cell phone etiquette and while people were looking at us funny, those of us at the table understood that answering our cell phones was important more often than not.

"Oh my God, I am so glad you called!" I told her. "I thought you were dead and lying in a ditch somewhere, Ann!"

Annie laughed a little. "I'm happy to talk to you too, Lanni!"

"How's the search going?" I asked, sipping some coffee.

"It could definitely be going better." Annie told me with a sigh. "I swear she knows I'm onto her. Every time I get a solid lead, she's one step ahead of me."

I laughed and smile. "Looks like Mom and John are a lot more alike than we gave them credit for before, which makes sense since they hunted together sometimes—I don't think you'll find her unless she wants to be found."

"How are you, Lanni?" Annie asked, and something in her tone made me realize what kind of call this was.

I swallowed because she couldn't _possibly_ know what had been going on with me lately and I didn't want to talk with the boys there. It had _nothing_ to do with keeping secrets it was just that I knew how they worried. My nightmares getting more and more vivid and more and more me being killed…they didn't need to be bothered with nightmares…unless this was definitely not just nightmares…

"You didn't just call to let me know how things were, did you?" I asked slowly.

Annie sighed again. "Truthfully…no. I keep having these dreams, Lanni, and they're not just nightmares."

"How much time do I have left?" I asked her suddenly.

There was a pause, and I knew she was surprised but not as surprised as Sam and Dean were. Kate sighed slowly because she had been having weird vibes too and Annie knew that she and I were connected and she knew how I was but at the same time she hadn't realized I'd been having the dreams too. Now Sam and Dean were exchanging looks and I heard Annie take a deep breath.

"How did you know it was about you dying?" Annie asked me.

I smiled sadly. "I just knew—it has to do with why you left."

"It most certainly does," Annie replied bitterly. "I think Dad's behind a lot more than we think he is but until we find Mom, we won't even know _who_ he is. That's why I have to find him, Lanni—I don't want to lose you."

"I don't want to lose you either, Annie. Keep me posted, all right?" I asked her. "And for the record, I'm going to be just fine."

"Of course, but hey, if those vibes of yours start to tell you to take it easy or run the other direction—listen to them. The full moon is fast approaching, and you know that our feelings are never far from the button," she warned me.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I know, Annie. I'll be careful. I love you."

"I love you too." Annie replied. "Bye for now, Lanni."

"Bye for now, Annie." I said, and we hung up.

I sat there for a moment looking at the phone and I kept the tears back surprisingly enough. If I was having visions of my death, and Annie was too, then it was inevitable. That meant I had to get my affairs in order—prepare for the futures Kate, Sam and Dean would have without me—prepare for the futures Kevin, Jen and the girls would have without me. Ironically, Jen called right as I thought about how more effort should be put into finding the girls and Dean had opened his mouth to say something to me.

"Hey, Jen," I said, forcing a smile.

"Lan, I know that tone. Hi, though," she told me.

I swallowed and smiled again, Sam's and Dean's eyes on me. "How's the search?"

"Actually, I was calling to tell you that we found them!" Jen exclaimed, and by the tone, I knew things were going to be fine.

"I'm so happy!" I replied, grinning.

Jen sighed suddenly. "But there's bad news that goes along with it."

"What, Jen?" I asked in my most serious tone.

"I've been having these visions of you dying, Lan. At first I thought they were just nightmares, but then Annie called, and said she was having them too, and at first I thought it was a coincidence, but then I realized that in this line of work, nothing is coincidence. Then we found the girls, and it's by no coincidence that your father was behind it—he sent a demon to do his bidding. He sent that demon with a message for you—he's coming." Jen explained to me.

I nodded slowly and motioned for Dean to move because I was by the window and I needed to stand. His shook his head though, even as I pleaded with him with me eyes for him to just let me go and get some air. I couldn't just sit around and do nothing and he _knew _that—I had to work my legs.

"You two aren't the only ones seeing it." I told her as I sighed and looked back at the diner table.

"Don't worry, Lan. Annie and I will work something out. I'm about to call her and tell her what the demon said. First I wanted to warn you—tell you that if you get any vibes that are screaming danger in your ear, you heed them. We are not going to lose you for good." Jen told me. "We just aren't."

I nodded and smiled. "I love you too, Jenny."

"Yeah, I love you. Now keep yourself safe. I have to call Annie." Jen said with a sigh.

"All right. But hey?" I stopped her.

"Yeah?" Jen asked me.

I took a deep breath. "I know you don't want to talk about it, and I know that with everyone aware we'll find a way out of it, but when and if I die, don't salt and burn my bones, all right? I want to be buried in a white dress—like the Amish. Even though I'm not Amish, I always liked the thought."

"Lanni, what's going on?" Dean asked me, pain in his voice.

I couldn't bear to glance at him so I just shook my head and continued. "I know you can all argue about moving on, but let's face it—I'll move on. I'm not going to hold onto anything down here. Sure, maybe something will change, but I really just—I want my body to rest in peace. When we burned John's body, it devastated me, and it devastated Sam and Dean and I don't anyone to have to go through that…please, Jenny. Promise me you'll bury me in a white dress and let me rest near my parents and my baby. And promise me you won't simply focus on trying to save me, all right? We all have lives to live and we'll get out of this. Promise me, Jenny."

Jen was actually crying now and I had some tears spilling out of my eyes, but she choked out an "of course", and then we said our goodbyes and hung up. This was going to be hard and I didn't want to dwell on it, but the boys had to know. So I wiped the tears off of my cheeks and I looked at their waiting faces and I took a deep breath.

"Annie, Jen and I have been having nightmares about my death…none of us think it's a coincidence." I explained to them.

"I've had a couple too," Kate admitted with a sigh. "I thought they were just nightmares until now…I suppose there were clues."

Sam took a breath. "Then why haven't _I _had any?"

"I don't know," I told him honestly. "I just know that if the four of us are having the same dreams, and the same vibes, they're not _just_ nightmares."

"Then we figure out how to stop this," Dean said seriously.

I smiled at him. "Right now, I just want some breakfast."

Dean opened his mouth to argue with me, but he looked up as the waitress brought us our things and we ate breakfast and then headed back to the motel. I explained my dreams to them and we did some research and then we went to bed after I explained that Jen had the girls back and that everything was going to be fine. We already had the upper hand and that was all that we needed…we could beat this.

"Why didn't you tell us about the nightmares earlier?" Dean asked me as we all settled into bed.

I shrugged at that. "I didn't think there was anything to it then, Dean—Kate, Annie and Jen _just_ told me they were having the dreams too. I mean come on…I was buried alive…that brings on some emotional baggage, don't you think? Nightmares are common after experiences like that."

"Fine, but if you have any vibes or you—" Dean was telling me.

"—look, look," I said, taking his hands and sitting on the bed, him following suit, "if I feel like I'm being followed, or that I'm in danger, I will tell you, and I will get myself out of it, all right? I promise you that. Just…can we _please_ go to sleep?"

"Rain check on our day?" Dean asked me softly.

I smiled a little bit. "Rain check on our day…sleep first."

Dean took a deep breath and nodded, me crawling into bed first as he turned out the light and snuggling into the covers. I smiled a little when Dean wrapped his arms around me and he placed a kiss behind my ear which made me have to focus _so_ hard on not crying. I cuddled into him and took his hand in mine, kissing it softly and falling asleep in his arms peacefully.

xx

Ever since we got into San Francisco, I was having weird vibes—not the kind that were screaming in my head for me to run, but I didn't like being after werewolves again…not at all. Of course thinking they were werewolves was just my vibes and then Kate started thinking it was and we all knew by now to just follow her gut. Sam was off with Kate looking at the autopsy report, while Dean and I sat in the hotel room—well, he sat, and I looked out the window.

"Are you okay?" Dean asked, coming up behind me and wrapping his arms around me, resting his chin on my shoulder.

I nodded slowly. "Yeah, I suppose."

"You're not having vibes are you?" Dean asked me.

"I think we're dealing with werewolves but no—nothing is making me want to run. Hey! We should go to a bar and play a role play game or something." I told him, him taking my arms and turning me to face him. "What?"

Dean shook his head. "I don't really feel like it."

I nodded at that and then I bit my lip and smiled at him because I needed him to think that I thought that everything was going to be fine. We had a hunt to focus on and even though it was important that we know what was coming and why, it was best to not make it seem worse than it was. If someone showed up we would take care of them but if we dwelt on it then we'd be distracted.

"Something's wrong," Dean told me.

I swallowed. "I just…what if this is just a way to distract us, Dean? What if nothing is coming for me? What if…I just…"

I trailed off when I started to get that feeling again…the feeling like I was being watched. This had nothing to do with werewolves—the case, yes, the person following me, no. Jen had said he was coming. He was here…he was here and he was waiting for the right time and I was wrong and I needed to own up to that. This was _very_ real and me being with Kate, Sam and Dean right now was putting them in danger.

"Lanni?" Dean asked, concerned.

I gave a smile. "I need to shower. Sam will be back any minute, so just fill me in when I'm done, okay?"

"Okay…" He said slowly.

"Unless…you want to join me in the shower?" I asked slowly, wrapping my arms around his neck. "I might just do that tongue thing that I do now…"

Dean's eyes lit up, but he shook his head. "They'll be back any moment and we all made that ridiculous pact, remember?"

"Okay," I laughed, kissing him swiftly.

I went into the bathroom and I closed the door, getting into the shower as the water ran, hot and wonderful, and then I stood there, the water running down me and I thought about everything. When was it going to happen? How would they find me? How would he kill me? Would I be enough of a match to fight back? How was I going to get Kate, Sam and Dean involved without getting them killed too?

I knew that part of me didn't _want_ to involve Kate, Sam and Dean but that would be selfish—I knew them well enough to know that since they knew about it all, keeping them out was wrong. If something happened to me and I hadn't let them help to fix it, they would _blame_ themselves, and I couldn't let that happen. At the same time, was it selfish to get them involved if it could potentially kill them? I needed to figure out what to do and quick…

I finished up my shower after shaking the thoughts out of my head and I wrapped a towel around myself and looked in the mirror, using my hand to wipe away the condensation, and I looked at myself. I was young, healthy, pretty. Sure I'd had my fair share of cuts and bruises, but I was strong—I couldn't be afraid of death. Then again, demons had bested us before and that meant that I had to get my affairs in order just in case.

"Lanni?" Dean asked as a tear trickled down my cheek.

"I'll be out in a moment," I told him.

He heard the strain in my voice to try and sound happy and fine, and opened the door, coming in and shutting the door behind him. He turned me around to face him, and I tried not to cry, but I couldn't help. If I died, then I wouldn't get to see him again and I wouldn't get to make up for any of the shit that I had put him through. I wouldn't get to kiss him, hug him, sleep next to him, watch him drink coffee, endure all of his vulgar tendencies…or _love _him…I didn't _want_ to die.

"What's wrong, Lanni? And don't feed me any of this, 'I'm fine' crap," he told me, looking at me sternly.

I tried to shrug it off, but it wasn't working, so I just kissed him—needy and passionate, nodding gently when he kissed me back. His fingers slipped into my hair and I opened up my mouth for his tongue, him knowing that I really needed this right now… what if this was the last that I had? What if we got this hunt down, the assassin sent after me showed up, and one of us died? I just wanted to show him that I loved him, and hopefully change the subject because I was done feeling bad—I had to be proactive about this and tell them what was going on. Dean bit my bottom lip just as I started to pull back, and I smiled at him lovingly as we made eye contact.

"Werewolves?" I asked him.

He nodded slowly. "Yeah, but you and I, we're talking later, okay?"

"Sure. Just…I'll meet you at the Impala, k? I have to get dressed," I told him.

Dean nodded and stroked my cheek with his thumb, both of us making eye contact and I smiled a bit when he was when he kissed me softly. Then he pulled back and left the bathroom, him, Kate and Sam waiting in the Impala until I got dressed and hurried out there too. We drove to the apartment of the girl who found the body—a very pretty brunette by the name of Madison, who was willing to talk to us.

"I don't understand. I already gave my statement to you," Madison told us.

Sam nodded quickly. "Right, yeah, but we just need to justify a few things."

"This is my neighbor, Glenn. Glenn, this is Detective…" She said, and then turned to us.

"Landis…and this is Detectives Dante, Sharon and Blake." Dean replied with a smile.

Glenn stood up and smiled too. "Well, I guess I'll leave you to it."

"Okay. Thanks for the casserole." Madison told Glenn as he left.

"Oh, how thoughtful," Dean said as Glenn went past us.

"Just call if you need anything." Glenn told Madison before he went out of the door of her apartment.

I smiled a little because it was actually kind of nice to see the boys already trying to impress the attractive, vulnerable girl, but at the same time, I laughed a little when Kate's heel found Sam's toe. They'd finally slept together and sweet talking the witness was _not _on her list of things for Sam to be doing now. Madison smiled at us and pointed towards where Glenn had left past us and I focused all attention on her.

"He's sweet." Madison told us. "He came over to check on me. Have—have a seat."

Kate smiled and stopped Sam. "Landis and Blake are going to be doing a sweep really quick, but Dante and I have it."

Dean gave her a look, but Sam nodded because he knew that Kate meant business and she wanted to get this case done. She hadn't really been in the hunting zone as of late and while Madison didn't get why they had to check her apartment, Kate set right on in with the questions and she just let us. Madison had no reason to believe that we weren't who we said we were or anything, and she smiled at Kate and I—it always was easier to talk to another woman.

"You must be pretty shaken up. You were Nate Mulligan's assistant, right?" I asked her as we took seats at the table.

"For nearly two years," Madison said automatically.

"So you knew everything about him?" Kate asked curiously.

Madison nodded slowly. "Probably knew him better than he knew himself. Nate was…nice."

"But…?" I asked as she gave a look.

"Nothing, really. It's just, after a couple scotches he hit on anyone within a five mile radius. You know the type." Madison explained to us.

Kate and I cracked smiles, and I laughed a little as she spoke up. "I know the type well. Landis over there does that _without _being inebriated."

"I can hear you," Dean shot at her.

"I know," Kate responded with a smile before looking back at Madison. "Did he have any enemies that you can think of?"

"What do you mean? Sure looked like an animal attack—" Madison began.

"—yeah, we're just covering all the bases." Kate explained to her. "Anyone who had a beef with him—a former client? An ex?"

Madison kind of looked at us for a moment like she didn't know how to answer, but then her face changed. She was definitely thinking about something, and Sam spoke up first, which made me smile a little—way to be observant, Sammy.

"What?" Sam asked her.

Madison took a breath. "This is embarrassing, but, my ex-boyfriend, Kurt."

"Kurt have a last name?" Kate and Dean asked quickly.

"Mueller," Madison replied with a nod. "After we broke up, he went kind of nuts. He's…well, he's kind of been stalking me. He got it into his head that there was something going on between Nate and I. He showed up at my office."

"What happened?" I asked her.

Madison shook her head. "Kurt got into it with Nate. Threw a punch at him before security grabbed him—I was lucky to keep my job."

"When was the last time you saw him?" Kate asked.

"A few nights ago," Madison answered. "Actually, the night Nate died. We were all getting drinks at this bar, and Kurt showed up."

"And?" I inquired, trying to get more out of her.

Madison shook her head. "Nothing. It was…like he was watching me. Then he was gone. To tell you the truth…he scares me."

"I'm sorry about that. We'll see what we can do—about everything." I told her, giving her a smile. "Thank you so much for your time."

Madison smiled and nodded. "No problem."

Since we were done questioning her, she showed us to the door, and I gave a wave and she smiled, shutting the door. I liked that girl—she was brave, independent, and totally sweet…it was refreshing to say the least. I really hoped we could figure this out and that she wouldn't be part of it because I didn't want anything to happen to her—she was too sweet and it would be nice to save a nice one for once.

"What do you think?" Dean asked as we went down the stairs.

Sam shrugged a little. "Crazy ex-boyfriend. He hates the boss, and he was there that night."

"Think he's our dog-faced boy?" Dean asked as I stopped right at the bottom of the stairs.

"Well, it's a theory." Sam said, and I looked around.

It was like I could feel eyes boring into me…we weren't alone here. He was near and he was watching me. I didn't know where he was, but I knew that at this point, he was toying with me and he was onto me. It almost seemed like he was _hunting_ me…and _that_ thought didn't bode well with me since I didn't know _what_ he was…how did I kill him?

"We've had worse," Kate told him.

Sam raised his eyebrows. "Yeah?"

"What do you say we pay a visit to our friend, Kurt?" Dean asked, both at the car, and he looked over at me. "Lanni?"

I pulled myself out of my head and hurried down the sidewalk to the car, looking around one last time as Kate and the boys waited for me to get in the car, and then I sat in the back seat and didn't say a word. What was happening to me? Was I going insane or was this honest to God happening right now and I was staring down the barrel at death?

xx

I opted to stay in the hotel while they went to go and see Kurt even though Dean was very against me being on my own. It took a lot to convince him that I was fine and I could handle myself and if all else failed, contact him, Kate and Sam if I needed them. I had the doors locked, and a gun near me in case the wolf showed up, and I had a pendant on that Bobby had given us, so I wouldn't be getting possessed so…everything was going to be just fine.

"Calm down, Lana. It's all, all right." I told myself.

But it wasn't—something was wrong. I was _never_ this paranoid…never this _scared_. I didn't know what was happening to me and that was when everything clicked for me—I was giving in. I was letting myself think I was going to die—I was being weak. I wasn't going to die. The demon would show itself, and then I would kill it or Sam and Dean would come in and save the say. Maybe Kate would be onto it first and kill the son of a bitch before it got to me…

I jumped when my phone rang though and then cursed under my breath, sad I was ridiculous like this. It was prolly just Kate, Jen, Annie, or Sam or Dean so why was I being jumpy. If I didn't have my wits about me then there was no way that I was going to get through this. Yes, everything scared me because of getting buried alive and having a demon possess me, but that couldn't happen now and I needed to answer my damn phone and talk to whoever was calling so they knew I was just fine.

"Hello?" I asked quickly.

"Hey, Lan. We really do think that Kurt is the werewolf." Sam told me.

I nodded slowly. "Okay, then Madison is in trouble."

"Exactly what I thought," Sam said with a smile. "Kate's already on her way over to protect her."

"Okay, so I guess you guys should head over there—straight away." I added, because I didn't want them to come a pick me up. "The more the better, right?"

I hung up before Sam could protest and then grabbed my jacket and headed over to Madison's. I knocked on the door and when she opened it up she smiled at me even though I knew she wasn't _entirely _happy to see me because I was a 'Fed'…yeah, except not and I felt safer with Madison than on my own…

"Hey," she said smiling. "Red's already here."

"I figured she'd get here first. The others are showing up later—can't be too careful when it's murder," I told her, trying to sound pleasant in an unpleasant situation at least.

Madison nodded at me. "Come on in then."

I followed her inside and smiled happily. "God I'm gonna miss that."

"Miss what?" Madison asked and I realized what I'd said.

I hadn't meant to say it but it had just come out when I had smelt the aroma of coffee and I liked her. It was pretty awesome that she and I had so many of the same things in common. The books on her book shelves, the coffee no matter what time of day—I liked her…I liked her a lot.

"Oh, I was just—I'm a coffee addict." I told her with a smile. "My name's Lana, by the way."

She smiled too, and then she handed me a mug of coffee and I took a sip, very happy to and I zoned out for a moment. What if this _was _just a scare tactic? What if there was something else bigger going on that we hadn't realized yet? It just didn't make sense to me why _I _had to be the one to die…what was the point behind it? I just…I was starting to feel doomed and I wanted old me back—fun me.

"That must be them," Madison said, going to the door, and I shook the thoughts away, wishing I could focus. "Come on in boys. Kate and Lana here tell me you're worried about Kurt."

"Yeah…has Kurt been here?" Sam asked her.

Madison poured them coffee. "Not exactly…"

"What does 'not exactly' mean?" Dean asked her.

Madison took a breath. "Well, last night he was here, watching me. Just watching me. Has he done something?"

"It's probably nothing, but we want to make sure." Sam explained to her.

"In fact, one of us should probably stay the night with you." Dean told her with a nod. "Where does he work?"

I nodded a little at the way Dean had said 'one of us should probably stay the night with you', and shook my head a little. "Kate or I can stay with Madison tonight."

"He owns a body shop." Madison replied, smiling at me. "Yeah, you or Red can stay."

"I can stay," Kate said smiling. "Jolly Green Giant can turn the covers down without me tonight."

I smiled a bit and laughed at the look on Sam's face and Madison seemed to realize that even though we were business partners, something else was going on. Kate liked to claim her territory the way that I did with Dean and it made me wonder if it was a girl thing or just a Meckenzie thing, whether Kate was a Newman or not. Still, we needed to focus on the hunt and it was important to know where Kurt was at all times.

Dean had the same idea. "You mind grabbing that address for us?"

"Sure," Madison answered, and left the room.

"All right, I'm staying," Kate said, kissing Sam swiftly. "One of you goes after Kurt and the other one stays with Lana at the motel so she can get some well deserved sleep as she's been jumpy all day…sound good?"

I laughed a little bit. "If Dean comes, I won't get any sleep."

"Yeah, motel room to ourselves…" Dean chuckled, winking at me.

"Then we settle who stays with Lana the old fashioned way." Sam told Dean, taking his coffee from him and setting it down, turning to him, and they started to play rock, paper, scissors, in which Dean did scissors and Sam did a rock. "Dean, always with the scissors." Sam told him, resting his hands on Dean's shoulders.

"Shut-up. Shut-up. Two out of three." Dean told him, but Dean did scissors yet again, and Sam did a rock, meaning Sam won. "God!"

Sam grinned at him. "Bundle up out there, all right?"

I smiled at the disgruntled look on Dean's face that turned into a little smirk as he headed out and I looked at Sam and drank the rest of my coffee. He looked pretty pleased with himself for winning rock-paper-scissors, and honestly? Honestly I was glad to know I wouldn't be alone and after Kate and Sam shared a loving kiss, Madison came back with the address for Dean.

With the coffee drunk, Sam and I went out to see Dean who was sitting in the car waiting for us and I got in the passenger seat even though Sam normally took it. He smiled at me and then he shook his head, his smile fading when he saw the look on my face. Why did he know me so well? It would be nice to be able to sometimes _not _be able to be read…I was just saying.

"You're coming with me—I left you alone once, and while being with Sam isn't leaving you alone, I feel safer keeping my eye on you myself." Dean told me with a shrug, turning over the engine, Sam smiling in the backseat at that.

I smiled and laughed a little. "Fine…let's go to his body shop then."

Dean nodded and the three of us headed to the body shop, finding out that he hadn't been to work in a few days and that he was probably at this strip club. I was tired and I wanted to sleep, so after a little argument with Dean, he dropped Sam and me off to sleep and he went off to the strip club on his own. It was probably better for him anyway—he'd have more time to focus on the pole dancers without feeling too guilty, and he wouldn't have to feel like he had to watch me like a hawk every second when I was getting tired of it.

I ended up picking up the phone and calling Dean when I was done e-mailing Jen and Annie, and I smiled when he actually picked up. Honestly I had expected to get his voicemail, but I had wanted to talk to _someone _other than Sam. Sam and I had talked while I was e-mailing and we talked about Dean and Kate and I missed Dean a bit.

"Are you tipping well?" I teased him when he picked up.

Dean chuckled at that. "I'd like to think so."

"Give her something more than ones if you wanna get lucky." I told him, running my fingers along the comforter.

"Oh, I'm already lucky," Dean said happily. "Unless you want me to get with a stripper…which is like, 'ouch', Lanni…"

"I want you to be happy." I replied shrugging, rolling my eyes. "It's cheesy and it's mushy, but it's true. Plus, no, I don't even want you to look at stripper."

Dean chuckled and I lay down and snuggled into the bed, listening intently. The music started to fade and I opened my eyes—what was he doing? He couldn't be _leaving _if he was keeping an eye on Kurt and he _knew_ that.

"What are you wearing?" Dean asked me.

I laughed and rolled my eyes. "You totally cannot ask that question when I'm not wearing anything fun…or at least you can't ask it when I'm wearing clothes. Sam is rolling his eyes at me—he's not into this phone sex thing like we are."

"And since when do you and Dean have phone sex?" Sam asked laughing.

Dean chuckled. "What did you crawl into bed in?"

"Still wearing my sweater and my jeans," I explained to him, shrugging at Sam because he had a point…Dean and I had yet to actually have phone sex. "Are you in a car?"

"I'm following him home." Dean explained to me. "You didn't change?"

I shook my head and closed my eyes again. "I'm too lazy to change into bed clothes."

"Well you didn't have to change _into_ anything. Just _out_ of them…" Dean informed me and I smirked.

"Now why would I go to bed without any clothes on if you weren't here?" I asked him, and then I sat up a little. "Besides…Sam is here."

Dean chuckled at that. "Good point—you're only naked for me."

I wiggled my eyebrows and smiled. "Exactly, I'm only naked for you."

"Conversation ending anytime soon?" Sam asked me, cheeks tinted a little pink. "My ears are bleeding."

I laughed and yawned. "Baby, I think I'm going to go ahead and go to sleep now. Wake me when you get in, okay?"

"I promise," Dean replied sincerely. "Night, Lanni."

"Night, Dean." I told him, and hung up the phone, setting it on the nightstand before I apologized to Sam, turned off the lamp and went to sleep.

xx

I woke up the next morning screaming and sweating. I had, had the worst nightmare yet. Shaking the thoughts away, I hurried into the shower and I bathed, getting out and getting dressed, suddenly realizing that I was alone in the motel. Looking at my phone, I noticed I had one new voicemail, and I listened to it, desperate to be kept in the loop.

"Lanni? It's me. I just wanted to tell you to meet us at Madison's place. You're probably sleeping, but she's the werewolf. She killed Kurt." Dean said, and that was that.

I hurried over to Madison's and Dean opened the door for me, and I walked in to see Madison tied to a chair. I was actually feeling pretty good that I wasn't feeling scared out of my wits, _and_ that neither Kate, Sam nor Dean felt like babying me today. At the same time…the feelings were definitely _not_ gone and that was a little unsettling, not gonna lie. Besides…Dean needed to protect Sam and if Madison was the werewolf, Kate was in the most immediate danger.

"Good timing. I just got here." Dean told me.

I nodded at that. "So, I find it disconcerting that my vibes are way off. I'm obviously too preoccupied with my own problems, which is like a giant 'no-no' in this profession."

"At least we know and Kate's kicking herself over it, but it's not her fault either, so don't be so hard on yourself, alright?" Dean asked, kissing my forehead.

"She knows we're not cops, huh?" I asked Dean.

Dean nodded slowly. "Definitely by now…"

"We gotta talk," Kate told us.

"I'll stay here," I said, and went into the room with Madison. "I'm sorry."

"If you're so sorry, can you please untie me?" Madison asked me.

I looked at the ground. "Actually, I can't. You see those guys? I totally can't take them and even if I tried, Red would kill me."

I smiled a little at that and then I bit my lip because I had things to ask her, but at the same time was it the time? I mean she was scared to death that we were going to kill her, and I wanted to know about her dead stalker? Madison caught on too and looked at me, both of us making eye contact and staying there for a little while just staring.

"You look like something's on your mind." Madison told me finally.

I took a deep breath. "Madison…when you felt Kurt watching you…was it scarier to see him watching you, or was it scarier to be able to feel that he was watching you?"

Madison swallowed. "As scary as it was to feel him watching me, it was scarier to know he was actually there."

"Okay," I answered with a nod.

She looked at me questioningly. "Why?"

"Nothing, I was…I was just wondering is all." I told her.

I knew I was a terrible liar, but before she could say anything, Kate, Sam and Dean came back into the room. They looked determined and I knew they had come up with something so I backed off and let them take over.

"Madison…when were you mugged?" Sam asked, but she was silent. "Please. It's important, all right. Just—answer the question."

"About a month ago," She said after a pause.

Kate nodded and continued quickly. "Did you see the guy?"

"No," she replied. "He grabbed me from behind."

"Did he bite you?" Kate asked.

So this is what he was getting at—he was going with John's theory: if you kill what bites them, then they're not infected anymore. It was far fetched, and had no actual legitimate proof to back it up, but none of us wanted to kill Madison if we didn't have to. If there was way to keep her alive, then we were going to find it no matter what it took.

"How did you know that?" She asked her.

"Where?" Sam asked a bit proud of Kate's question.

"O-on the back of my neck," she replied.

Kate wanted to let her know that she could be trusted, so she showed her the gun and put it down on the dresser. Madison nodded a little and so Kate went over to her slowly and moved her hair away from her neck. Madison had _definitely _been bitten, which meant that she was _definitely_ our werewolf and we were _definitely _going to have to keep her under observation.

"Oh, that's just a love bite," Dean said as he, Sam and I looked at it too. "Believe me, it could have been a lot worse. Where were you when it happened?"

She looked up at him. "Walking home, from a friend's loft."

"Let me guess. Not too far from Hunter's Point?" Sam asked.

Madison nodded, and then Kate, Sam and Dean went into the other room again to talk things over, leaving me with Madison. I felt so bad about everything that was happening to her, and I hoped that we could fix this…I genuinely liked her. I sighed, looking at Madison as tears rolled down her cheeks and I bit my lip but I knew I needed to talk to her. This was all so much for her.

"I'm so sorry. We're going to fix this." I told her.

"Come on, Lanni—you're with me," Dean said as he poked his head back in.

I nodded, and followed him out, both of us going and parking at Hunter's Point, watching. Dean was pretty focused on finding this werewolf because Kate and Sam wanted to save Madison so much, and I was focused on it too. There were no vibes—no nothing that made me feel awkward but then I felt it—the werewolf was near. We saw a blonde hooker walking around, and then the werewolf showed up and Dean shot it down, the girl running off.

"Yeah, don't mention it!" He called after her, and we both knelt down as the real Glenn surfaced, his teeth returning to normal.

"What happened? Where am I?" Glenn asked blood in his mouth. "H-help me. God, oh my God…"

Dean looked up as we heard sirens, and I rested my hand on a part of Glenn's shirt that didn't have blood on it. I really wished that Glenn hadn't been suffering like this, because he honestly didn't look like he knew what was going on. Did he even _know_ that he was a werewolf? This wasn't working…

"Easy Glenn, just take it easy," Dean told him.

"It's going to be okay," I managed to say before he died.

Dean and I looked at Glenn's body for a few moments before Dean got up and held out his hand for mine. I accepted his hand and he pulled me up, me pulling my hand from his when I realized I had some blood on it. He nodded at me and we went back to the motel, cleaning up and then sitting down on the bed and looking at each other.

"You okay? You're really looking shaken up," he told me softly. "That's not normally like you with cases like this."

"I just—he had no idea. None whatsoever…" I said slowly, biting my lip.

Dean nodded and held me. "Yeah, it was kind of sad."

I stroked his hair. "What happened last night?"

"Madison knocked me out," Dean replied and chuckled when I told him I was sorry. "Me too…it's really manly to get knocked out by a female werewolf, huh?"

"You've been knocked around by weaker females," I told him and smiled when he gave me a look. "Hey, myself included…though nothing truly sexy in terms of fights."

We both ended up laughing about it and then he used his free hand to stroke my cheek and he took a deep breath. He wanted to protect me, and he wanted me safe, but he also hated it when I was so upset. I took his hand and kissed it, putting our hands on his thigh and taking a deep breath.

"You're manly enough for me, that's for sure, all right?" I told him, shrugging.

Dean smiled at me. "I need you to stop being distant, Lanni."

"Promise—now let's go make sure that the others are doing okay, all right? If we have to shoot her and this doesn't work…you have to do it." I said softly. "You or Kate—you're both stronger than Sam and I."

Dean nodded at me and we went to Madison's place so that we could watch over them and keep everything controlled. Kate and Sam looked so hopeful about it all and Madison was glad to be untied, and I was glad that she, Kate and I had time to spend together. The three of enjoyed the same kinds of things and I just didn't want her to die…it wasn't fair. I smiled at Kate and Madison and then glanced at Dean, he and I making direct eye contact before looking back at the sight.

"We gotta hang in there until sunup," Sam told Madison, and I focused on that instead of the fact that now the demon wanted me to know where he was.

"Well, looks like we got a few hours to kill. Poker, anyone?" Dean offered us.

We actually ended up all doing various things: we got to know Madison a little better, and she was my kind of girl—even had 'The Complete Works of William Shakespeare' which she let me read the majority of the day, Kate commenting about Madison's lack of a liquor cabinet. When it got to be night time, Dean and I sat by the window, Dean looking out of it, me with my nose in the book. He set his gun on an end table, and Madison and Sam looked at it.

"Oh, no, you guys talk," Dean said, not even looking at them and then he leaned his arm over and smiled at me as I snuggled into him and continued to read.

We stayed there until sunrise, all of us watching it and smiling because it seemed to have worked—Madison hadn't turned. That meant that Madison was free from this curse and if that was true, then she didn't have to die…we'd saved her. It felt nice to be able to do something like that when it came to an actual person like this that we all actually enjoyed spending time with.

"Does—does this mean it worked?" Madison asked happily as Sam nodded his head merrily.

He took a breath, looking at the sunrise. "Yeah, I think so."

"Oh, God, thank you. Thank you so much." Madison said, hugging Sam fiercely, Dean coughing to get noticed for _his_ actions as well.

"And you too, Dean." She said pulling away from Sam. "Thank you."

"Nah, don't mention it," Dean told her, chuckling.

"And you too. Thank you." Madison said, hugging Kate and I, us hugging her back.

We smiled at her. "No problem."

"I just—thanks for being here for me. I hope you figure out that little problem of yours too," she said, referring to the question I'd asked earlier—referring to my demon—_literally_ referring to my demon.

"So, I'm just going to head back to the hotel, and watch some pay-per-view or something." Dean said, backing up towards the door. "Lanni? You want to join me?"

I gave him a look. "Yeah…sure."

I looked at Kate, Sam and Madison, walking backwards and mouth, 'sorry about him', before following Dean back to the hotel. Kate had the idea to make Sam and Madison some breakfast and then Madison was going to take a well deserved nap while Kate and Sam got some much needed sleep together. Dean went to get some food, and I freaked out again, the feeling still feeling like he was in the room…like the guy coming for me was _in_ the room. When Dean got back, he set the food down and looked at me, sitting next to me on the bed as I wiped the tears off my face…this was really happening.

"Why are you crying? I know Glenn's death was hard on you, Lanni, but normally you're tougher than this." He said softly.

"It has nothing to do with werewolves, Dean," I told him and then I closed my eyes and groaned. "Why is it that lately I can't do this? I'm normally not this pathetic! I just…what if I _do_ die, Dean? What if this is really the last time you and I are ever going to get to spend time together and eat together?"

Dean shook his head. "It won't be, Lanni."

"But you don't _know_ that," I told him, and I realized that this was the perfect time to get my unfinished business out of the way when Dean swallowed and looked me in the eye. "I want you to be happy, Dean. I mean you believe that right?"

"I'm not going to let you die, Lanni," Dean said and then before I knew it, he was kissing me and it took me a moment to react.

I returned the kiss though and I smiled into it as he held me closer to him, both of us focused on each other. Dean's hands were seasoned, and I moaned into him and yet I was so afraid I was _actually _going to lose him and that he actually thought he was going to lose me that I started to cry. It wasn't sobbing…it was just tears and Dean nodded in understanding, but we continued where we were going. We made eye contact as much as possible, we kept the other's body close, and afterwards Dean just held me to him and stroked my hair, letting his lips trail along my damp skin wherever they wanted to go and I liked that.

"You're safe, right here," Dean told me as he kissed my chin.

Smiling, I nodded. "Right in your arms…"

Dean nodded and smiled, holding me close and stroking my skin reverently with his fingertips. I made sure that Dean fell asleep before I did so that I could watch him sleep. It was kind of cute because he had been trying to fall asleep before _me _and then sleep had overtook him and only then did I have the heart to fall asleep after looking at his adorable face. I snuggled into him and fell asleep, glad that I was in his arms like this.

All of that was then brought back into focus when Sam came bursting into the hotel room, talking about how Madison had turned. I sat up and then hurried into the bathroom with the sheet around me and some clothes so I could change into them, wishing that there was more I could do. I got dressed and followed Kate, Sam and Dean down the stairs, both talking about how Bobby had nothing—no one had anything. The theory didn't work…she was going to be a werewolf forever.

Sam and Dean started to argue again, but this time about how part of her was a monster, and Sam and Kate got defensive—people said that about him too. Me? I was part demon. That made me worse than Madison, but I didn't want to talk about it. They didn't need me to talk about it and I knew that and I knew that this wasn't about me…it was about Madison and how we needed another option.

I looked around as they argued, Kate's affection for Madison growing with each angry word, and my eyes landed on the demon. He gave a wave, taunting me, and then I heard the words, 'Your Daddy says hello' in my head before I looked at the others to see that they had no idea I wasn't listening, and then looked back to see the demon gone. He was here and he was ready for me, and I needed to stay calm…demon meant I could take him out with my powers…and I was pulled out of my thoughts by Madison calling so we picked up and headed to her place, all of us sitting there listening to her talk.

"I don't remember anything. I probably killed someone last night." Madison told us sadly. "Didn't I?"

Dean shook his head. "There's no way to tell yet."

"Is there something else we can try? Something else to make this go away?" Madison asked us.

Sam said he was sure there were other things to try, but Kate and Dean told her they were up against a brick wall, and there was no cure. Kate's and Sam's hurt faces, and Madison's and Dean's, all made something break inside of me—they went through enough pain as it was. Why more? Why now? Madison didn't want to hurt anybody—didn't want to hurt Sam, Dean, Kate or me. It was even worse when Madison asked Kate to kill her, and for once, Kate said she couldn't, making Dean take the gun from her.

It was too hard for me to stay there and I didn't want to see Madison get shot even though I wanted to be there for Kate. So I headed outside and took a deep breath—Sam thought he had to do this for Kate and Madison but Dean and I didn't want him to do this…and Kate decided that it was time for her to suck it up. She was a hunter and she was going to be there for her friend like Madison had asked her to be, and I went outside, coming face to face with the demon.

"What do you want? What does my father want?" I asked him.

"He wants you dead," the man said, and then he opened up his hand and made a tight fist, causing me to scream, which was at first drowned out by the sound of a gunshot—Kate went through with it.

I made a fireball in my hand but my head was searing in so much pain that it went out as I tried to focus. It was almost like his fist was holding my brain—breaking it and crushing it in his grasp. I felt blood gush into my mouth, and my vision began to go blurry as I heard another scream, only this one familiar as I tried to make another fireball and threw it. The metallic taste got worse as I hit the ground, and I closed my eyes because I didn't have anymore strength left.

"Lanni? No! Lanni! Lanni! Get up, Lanni! Come on!" Kate said, the tears spilling out of her eyes, a couple splattering against my cheeks.

I smiled weakly. "I love you, Kate."

I heard a door slam, and as Dean cried my name, I choked a bit on my blood, and then everything went very black—and I felt cold…

**Note: And there you have it. I really do suggest tissues for the next chapter because you're going to need them. Just remember that this story isn't even halfway finished yet too so there's a LOT more to come. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	24. Moving On

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Seriously people…TISSUES. I mean I'm more attached than you guys but I sobbed rewriting this so…be aware of that.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for language, dirty thoughts, sex, innuendo, blood, violence and dark themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

Everything happened so fast. Nothing was going right. Nothing was going my way. I had had the feeling that something bad was going to happen. I had felt like I was being watched—hunted—but I wasn't actually sure I would end up like this. I hadn't expected to actually slip into a coma because I thought I could use my fireballs to kill a demon but…this demon had been _strong_…and I didn't think I was coming back.

"Okay, Sammy…pull out the weedgie board." I said, standing in the room where Sam and Dean were sitting on either side of my hospital bed.

The doctor strolled into the room. "Morning…"

"What did the test results say?" Sam asked, standing up immediately as Dean kissed my hand.

"She's practically brain dead." The doctor replied softly. "She's—there's no chance she's going to wake-up from this. It was a really bad hemorrhage."

"No," I said softly, shaking my head. "No..."

"What?" Sam asked as Dean held my hand and some tears he had been trying to keep in slid down his cheeks.

How could this possibly be happening and _why _did I have to watch it? I should have stayed inside to just deal with what Sam and Dean were going through but no…I had been an idiot and gone out by myself. I was lucky that Kate had showed up when she had but it hadn't been enough…I was brain-dead…or at least I was going to be soon.

xx

**Dean's POV**

I couldn't believe that she was actually dying right in the bed next to me. I mean I _knew_ when she was freaking out that she felt like she was going to die but why did it have to be _Lana_?! Why? The one woman that I had given everything too…the one that I knew that I couldn't live without…why did it have to be _her_? One thing was for certain: I would definitely be getting some revenge.

"When can we claim her body?" Annie asked, coming into the room.

Sam and I gave her looks, but part of me knew that she was just doing what she thought was the right thing to do. He and I had heard her conversation to Jen and they had all three been convinced that it was going to happen and that it was inevitable…but why was it that the demon had been after Lana? What was it about her that made it so that _she _had to be singled out? Why couldn't I put it all together?

"Annie!" Sam said in a soft, strong voice.

"Sammy, I will explain to you later. Just…please…how long should we wait before we take her off of life support?" Annie asked the doctor as Kate made it into the room, her face tear stained.

"You're not even willing to see if there will be a miracle?" Sam asked her and I could tell that he was losing patience with her.

The doctor took a deep breath. "We can wait for a good day or two. After about two and a half days, her organs will shut down."

Annie nodded, trying to be strong. "Lanni would want to donate her organs."

"We wait two days," I said, speaking for the first time in hours.

I knew that everyone was looking at me, but I had to let them know that I was part of this decision because Lana would want that. For some reason that I still hadn't figured out yet, she had wanted to be my _wife _and as her almost husband, this was just as much _my choice_. I looked up and the doctor and I made direct eye contact, then the doctor nodded and left the room, Sam whirling on Annie. Annie knew that there was a blow coming and she took a breath, trying to keep her tears in.

"What is wrong with you, Annie?" Sam asked, completely devastated at this point.

Annie wiped a fallen tear away. "Sammy, this is what Lanni would want—you _heard_ the doctor, didn't you?"

"If there is a way to save Lanni then we'll find it." Jen said, coming into the room and taking off her jacket. "I think you need to be prepared for her to die though."

"But we can fix this!" Sam protested loudly.

I took a deep breath. "Sam, keep your voice down—that isn't helping."

Sam nodded at me and Kate took his hand in hers and kissed it as Jen and Annie both exchanged glances as I looked back down at Lana lying there unconscious. She was hooked up to machines that were monitoring everything that her body was doing and it was killing me. What if this was really it and I really did lose her? What was I going to do if she was taken away from me like this? I _had_ to find a way to save her and I had to find the way _now_.

"Did the demon get away?" Jen asked us.

Kate took a deep breath. "Yeah…she tried to hit it with a fireball but she missed…he said his job was done though…"

"What job? What the Hell does it mean?" Sam asked them.

"It means that Lan was a threat and the demon took care of it…or this is all part of a bigger plan that we're falling right into." Jen explained sadly. "Demons are a much more normal part of our lives than you realize, Sammy. As you know, while she knew it was a demon, Lana never knew _which _demon was her father. The key to finding out his identity is finding their mother, which is a feat all in itself. Remember trying to find John? Tracking Florence down is just as hard."

Annie took a deep breath. "And the reason we're telling you this, is because the job was issued by a demon claiming to be her father: he wants Lana dead."

"He's a demon—it's not all that surprising," I told them bitterly.

"Okay but she's his daughter and we know that demons have gray areas—I mean he had a child with a human." Sam protested. "Doesn't that count?"

"Technically, Aunt Florence is a witch, so…army potential is more like it," Kate said.

I shook my head as Jen smiled at him and reached into my jacket pocket to pull out the jewelry box. I'd been looking at it every day since things fell apart and this seemed like the best way to do all of this if I was really losing her. So I opened up the box and slid the engagement ring onto her finger…I didn't want her to be without it. God, I actually was feeling bad that we had never gotten married because I wanted to be her husband—I wanted to be with her forever. This couldn't end this way.

Jen took a deep breath. "Not really, Sam. I mean as much as I want to believe you, their dad could have just been looking for a good night and witches—the majority of them—fall into that 'demonic' category. I'm more on Kate's side here."

"Just in it for one night?" Sam asked her skeptically. "Lana made it seem like at one point that her father and her mother slept together when he was in a body not hers…"

"These are all things we have to ask Mom," Annie said dismally. "When we find her, you can ask her as many questions as you want. "Besides, doesn't it make sense that he might want her dead? She got a new life—a new home—she got to live and was trained to _fight _demons, not to help them. And now—now Lanni has fallen in with demon hunters…_damn_ good demon hunters. Do you see any demons wanting their daughters to hunt demons? Just—just please can we stop talking about this? Lana has two days and we should be figuring out how to save her if we can."

xx

**Lana's POV**

"I don't see how any of this is even fair," I said aloud to myself.

I knew that this was what Kate, Jen, Annie and I had seen, and I was pretty certain that this was my last legs. Dean had slid that ring onto my finger and kissed my hand and I just…I couldn't leave without saying 'goodbye'—I'd told him I'd never do that. I _refused_ to move on before I said my 'goodbyes'…screw my promise.

Jen literally had to drag Dean out of my room to make him eat after a little while of watching them all too. It was sweet that her motherly instincts made her look after him, but I was still worried about him. This was going to break him, and still, no one had pulled out the weedgie board. Dean wouldn't remember it, due to the fact that he remembered nothing of his near death experience, and I think Sam was too completely devastated to think straight.

For the last hour, he'd been reading to me out of my 'Complete Works of William Shakespeare' that I had buried in my duffle. He kept looking over at me, expecting me to wake up, but I wasn't going to. Of course I hadn't seen a Reaper yet either, so maybe my luck was changing…maybe my bad karma was becoming good karma.

"That's what you'd like to think," a man said.

I turned to see a blonde-haired man in a suit and I sighed. "You're my Reaper?"

He nodded slowly. "I wasn't going to show up until a few hours before they took you off of life support, but you have some issues you need to get through…obstacles to climb."

"What's your name?" I asked him.

"To you, it's Andrew," he said with a smile.

I nodded slowly. "Okay, Andrew."

He smiled at me and then he looked at Sam as I watched him, me noting that look on his face and I made a face. This was probably the time when he tried to help me through it all and remind me that they would move on fine and I understood that, but I wanted to say 'goodbye' and I wanted to do it properly. Andrew didn't even look back at me, he just kept watching what was going on in my hospital room.

He smiled a little more. "He loves you…"

"Yeah, we're best friends—family…I love him too," I explained to him.

Andrew nodded slowly. "You're the sister that he never had and his one true confidant—losing you will cut him deep. Still, look at Kate. The way she comes to check on him and strokes his hair and sits on his lap…"

"The way she looks at him…" I added with a smile on my face. "She'll take care of him while I'm gone."

"Yes, she will, he's in good hands," Andrew agreed with a smile.

"But what about Dean?" I asked slowly.

Andrew nodded as I asked the question and turned to look at me. "We don't want anything here tying you down, Lana. You want to move on, right? You promised Annie you wouldn't be a spirit?"

I took a deep breath. "Yeah…so you're telling me that unless I own up about everything bothering me, I'll be an angry spirit?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying, Lana, but I'm not rushing you—you have a good 48 hours," he explained to me.

I nodded, and looked at Sam as he read some more to me, and then stopped, setting the book down and holding my hand. He kissed it softly, and then the tears came, and so did mine because I hated this. I hated having to just _watch_ everything happen because I wanted to fix this but I couldn't…I was just a spirit right now.

"You have to pull through this, Lanni," Sam whispered to me, "please…"

I wiped a tear away as I realized he called me 'Lanni', and I sat down in the chair in the corner, putting my head in my hands. I knew that Sam and I had no romantic feelings towards each other—I could feel that in my heart—but it hurt that he was _this _worried about me and using that nickname. Why was it that I had to hurt them this much more? Why hadn't I left when I had the chance? Except that Dean had wanted me to stay…he had wanted to be near me…marry me someday…

God…I had never gotten to get married or be a mother…

"I really need you to wake up, Lanni. Come on. I can't let you die. I can't just sit here like Jen, Annie and Dean. Hell, Kate's out in the waiting room on her laptop sometimes researching away. It isn't fair to let you just lay here. I love you, Lanni. I'm not saying I want to spend the rest of my life with you, because I don't…not like that," Sam explained to me. "I just…I want you to be around to be in my life. I miss you siding with both Dean and I in arguments, I miss you making Dean smile when no one else can, and I want to be able to find a miracle so you and Dean can start a family because I want you to be the mother of my nieces and nephews. I want to _have _nieces and nephews. I want you and Dean to get married so you can actually be my sister-in-law. Come on, Lan…we need you here. Me and Dean. Kate, Jen, Kaydee, Minah, Annie—your mother even…we need you to be with us. Please pull through this. Please."

I wiped tears away and stood up, looking at Andrew. "How could this happen to them right now? To Sam right now? This is what, the day after the Full Moon? Sam just had to watch Kate shoot Maddie! Have you seen where his head's at?!" I asked angrily, the tears coming as I looked back at Sam. "Please don't tear me away from him. He needs me. I need him."

Andrew rested a hand on my shoulder. "Lana…some things have to happen, even if it's devastating. There is _always_ a plan."

It hurt me that he had just said what he had said to me because I believed him—there is _always_ a plan. I firmly believed that everything happened for a reason and maybe in a deeply sad way, _this_ had to happen. Maybe I _had_ to die because there was a bigger plan in motion…but why now? Why did everyone have to fall apart right _now_?

I turned to Andrew. "Even if it's going to break them? There are so many things that I can't say to them. So many things I want them to hear."

"They know you love them," Andrew said, looking me in the eye. "They know that you would have done anything for them. They'll never remember bad things about you…they'll keep you in their hearts."

What he was saying helped and didn't all at once—I wanted to hug Sam. Pull him to me, kiss his head and tell him how sorry I was to leave. How sorry I was that all of this was happening to him. I wanted to tell Kate that hunting with her and being around her all the time made me happier than I'd been in a long time and I wanted to tell Annie I was glad I'd found her and that I appreciated her and Jen…I wanted to tell Jen that she was my platonic soul mate. Mostly, I didn't want to leave Sam and Dean like this…I didn't want to leave anyone like this. I needed to talk to them and let them know that I was all right, and that I didn't fear death…I was just afraid of being away from them.

"Andrew, please…please let me talk to them," I begged him.

Andrew sighed and shook his head. "Lana, I can't do that. I'm here to have you face your demons, your fears—everything that's keeping you here…that's _all_ I do."

I nodded sadly, too tired to argue with him, and I wished I could touch Sam…wished he would know I was here—watching. I looked up as Dean came into the room and Sam looked up and smiled sadly. The look between them was tearing my heart to pieces and I had to take deep breaths.

"Can I be alone with her, please?" Dean asked Sam.

Sam nodded quickly. "Of course—I'll go get coffee with the girls."

I smiled a little at that—how I would love to have some coffee right about now. Sam got up and headed for the door, glancing at Dean and nodding softly as Dean walked over to my hospital bed slowly. After Sam shut the door behind him, Dean ran his hand down his face and then he took a deep breath.

"God, why does this happen to me?" Dean asked brokenly, and he climbed onto the hospital bed with my body, and he rested there, holding me to him. "Can't you wake up?"

I turned to Andrew. "Can't I?"

Andrew shook his head softly, and I nodded slowly, looking at Dean and starting to cry again. I _hated_ seeing Dean like this—on the verge of tears—and I hated even _more_ that I couldn't _do_ anything about it. He was just lying there holding onto me, talking to me in hopes that I would hear him and I would move…in hopes that I would get up and recover. In all of this, I was just finding out that Dean Winchester actually wanted to be my husband and that he didn't want to ever let me go and I wanted to be his wife—I wanted to find that miracle with Sam and start a family with Dean…give him the home that he'd always deserved.

"I'm being selfish here, but this isn't fair. It isn't fair for me _or_ Sammy. We lost Mom, Dad, he lost Jessica…we can't lose you too. We need you. _I_ need you. We're perfect together." Dean whispered to me. "In all of this, Sam has Kate to pull him through and even though she hasn't said it yet, she loves him and he loves you—you can tell—but Baby I can't do this without you, all right? I don't have anyone the way that I always had you and I never will again, I know that. I don't see how it's fair for us to almost have a baby, and then lose the baby, and then for you to be buried alive. We finally started to be in a good place, Lanni…we were starting over and we were being truthful, and I just…I want this new chance of ours to work…Baby, I need you."

"I need you too," I whispered softly through the tears even though he couldn't hear me.

"I think what I miss most is just you talking, honestly," Dean continued. "Through all the bad times, you always had the perfect thing to say to make me feel better if that was what you were going for. You were so calm about most things, and even when you cried, it wasn't a lot of blubbering…you cared. You cared _so_ much…I never showed you how much I really cared, ever, did I? I mean I almost cheated on you, I always flirt, and I never gave you the chance that Sam did when I found out about your father."

"Yes, you did," I said aloud. "Andrew, please. I need him to hear me."

"I need you," Dean whispered, kissing my lips, but I couldn't kiss him back and it was killing me. "Please come back."

I left the room because I couldn't take it anymore and Andrew followed me, not saying a word. This was torture…I couldn't believe after all this time Dean still felt like _he_ didn't deserve _me_…what the _Hell_?! It was like some kind of character flaw with him to think that he was worthless when he wasn't…Dean Winchester was a hero and _I_ was lucky to be with _him_. I wanted to cope and go if I really had to die…if I wasn't getting back in my body I wanted to move on already.

"Andrew?" I asked him.

"Yes?" He replied without skipping a beat.

I took a deep breath. "What else do you want me to cope with?"

Andrew sat on one of the empty hospital beds and looked me in the eye. "There are only a couple more things for you, Lanni. You love Dean. You love Sam. They know it. You've bonded with your sister, been there for Jen and Kevin and the girls. You're at a really good place with Kate and she's almost like another sister to you and she knows how much you love her. You've even made peace with the fact that you've had a miscarriage and you can't have children. What's left, Lanni, is simply letting go…you seem more at peace. You don't like seeing Dean hurting, but that's because you care so much. You just have to let go. You're coping. You're realizing. Now you just need to be willing to move on."

"Not until I talk to them," I told him firmly. "Not until I get to actually say 'goodbye' to my family."

xx

Later on, Kate and Sam were sitting by my bed, Dean was out with Jen and Annie grabbing food to bring back, and I was watching. Still no board. No one was even trying to get onto this plane and it wasn't like Kate, Annie and Jen couldn't. Should I just leave? No. Then I'd have unfinished business, as Andrew kept pointing out to me. In order to move on, I had to be willing, and leaving without saying goodbye when I felt this strongly about it, constituted as unfinished business.

"Stop reading Othello, Sam. He kills his wife in the end," I said lovingly as Sam read a monologue that Iago had.

Andrew laughed softly. "He really thinks this Shakespeare stuff will bring you back."

"I know he does," I told him with a nod. "Othello is even my favorite one…even though it's depressing…it's beautiful and that's all that matters."

"Let's read her favorite comedy instead," Kate said suddenly, climbing onto Sam's lap. "Wake her up with happy instead of sad…"

I looked up as Jen came into the room with Sam's duffle, and pulled out the weedgie board. Finally! It wasn't as good as getting on this plane of existence, but it was a start and from there I knew what Jen would think of. Andrew smile a little as my smile got bigger and he nodded—he was actually really sweet…for a Reaper.

"You can talk to them that way," Andrew told me as I smiled when Jen sat on the floor and moved the piece around on the board.

"Lana?" Jen asked aloud. "Are you here?"

I sat down in front of her and moved the piece to the 'YES' on the board.

Jen smiled at me. "Thank God. How are you?"

"What a thing to ask, Jen," I laughed softly.

I moved the letter's around to spell out, 'my reaper and I are doing okay. I want Dean, though. Oh, and Sammy, I love you too. Kate? Happy is good.'

Sam smiled at that and nodded. "I'm glad you heard all of that earlier. Does this mean you're coming back to us?"

I shook my head sadly, and slowly moved the piece to the 'NO'. Annie came into the room with Dean, both with food, and they both looked at the board and I moved the piece around to spell out, 'hi, Annie, and Dean. I miss you.' Annie just smiled, but the hope that crossed Dean's face made my heart pang with pain and guilt—he wanted me back so desperately but I couldn't come back…not without a miracle that we didn't have.

"How do we get you back?" Dean asked suddenly.

I looked at his sad, yet hopeful face and started to cry, but spelled out, 'you don't.'

"What do you mean we don't?" He asked harshly.

I knew he hadn't meant it to be harsh but he was out of options and he didn't want me to die…and I didn't _want _to die…but I had to. I wiped a tear away and then moved the piece around to spell out, 'I mean that there's nothing you can do to save me, Dean. I'm simply glad to be telling you all goodbye before I move on.'

"You are _not_ moving on, Lan," Sam protested earnestly. "How do we save you?"

I smiled and spelled out, 'I know you mean well, but there's nothing to do.'

"There's something we can do," Kate said firmly.

"Of course there is," Lance replied, coming into the room.

"What do you suggest?" Dean asked him, actually being cordial.

"I go to the other plane and I make a switch," Lance told him with a nod. "If it worked for John, I'm sure it'll work for me."

Kate made a face. "I really wish I'd thought about that first…"

xx

I hugged Lance when he got onto the same plane as me…honestly I was going to miss him. I knew why he was here, and I knew what he was trying to do, but I couldn't let him. I knew how Dean felt everyday, knowing his father gave his life to save him, and I didn't want to walk around knowing Lance gave his life up for me. It wasn't right. It was my time to go, and I wanted people to understand that. As scared as I was of leaving everyone and everything behind, I didn't want Lance to deal with this.

"Don't worry, Kid. You'll be back out there in no time," Lance told me.

I shook my head. "Actually, I won't."

"Where's this reaper of yours?" Lance asked me, ignoring what I had said.

"Andrew isn't here right now." I replied slowly.

Lance raised his eyebrows. "Andrew?"

"My reaper," I explained to him with a small smile.

Lance nodded slowly. "So where is Andrew?"

I smiled at the effort Lance was putting into this, but he couldn't do this—not for me. Besides, that wasn't what Andrew did. He and I had been talking to each other about quite a lot of things and this was one of them. Andrew was simply here to help me to let go and to get my soul to where it belonged…he couldn't make deals.

"Andrew doesn't want to talk to you," I replied with a shrug.

Lance made a face. "Why not?"

"Andrew's afraid he'll get punched, actually," I said, and smiled, "but he told me everything I needed to know to tell you."

"About what?" Lance asked, a little annoyed.

I took a breath. "Andrew isn't going to make the switch. It isn't his place—isn't his job. He comes directly from Death—his only job is to help me to move on, and he's doing well at it. I'm almost ready…I'm glad I get to say goodbye to you, and I really wish Kevin, Kalli and Kat were here."

"Wow," Lance said, nodding slowly. "You seem so calm for a girl who has less than 48 hours to live."

"I guess," I shrugged. "I mean I'm coping…"

Lance hugged me again, and I cried a little, but I composed myself as he took a breath and held me close. He was still my friend and he _had_ come here to give up his life for me and I appreciated him for that more than he would ever know. I pulled out of the hug and kissed his cheek, smiling sadly.

"I'm always going to miss you, Lancey. Even though we drifted, you're my buddy." I told him.

"You too, Lan-Bon," he replied, and I wiped a tear away.

"Compose yourself—you're a man." I told him, trying to make light of the situation, and he nodded. "Hey…can you make sure that Jen, Dean and Annie have final say of what happens to my body, please?"

Lance nodded and smiled. "I promise."

I nodded too and watched him chant something, taking him back to the other plane—a ripple effect. I turned to look as Dean asked what had happened, and Lance explained that no switch could be made which broke Dean even more and the look on his face hurt me even more than before.

"I think we should all have our goodbyes out before she runs out of time," Lance told them. "It's really the only thing that we can do now."

Jen nodded slowly. "I second that motion."

Sam stood up. "I want to go first."

Dean was still lying on the hospital bed, and he looked at my lifeless body as Jen made Sam sit down, and then she moved him onto this plane. I smiled when Sam saw me, and the tears came as tears came to his eyes too. I ran to him, happy when he embraced me tightly, and kissed my head. He stroked my hair and took a breath and then I felt the grip on me loosen a bit.

"I really thought I'd never get to see you again," he said, pulling away and looking me in the eye.

I smiled through the sadness. "Blame the crazy world we live in."

"God, Lanni," Sam replied, pulling me to him again, tears in his eyes. "I don't know if we can do this."

"Aww, Sammy, you guys can get through this fine. I promise." I told him with a sad smile. "I'll always be with you."

Sam pulled away again and rested his forehead on mine and I nodded and we both closed our eyes. God it was going to hurt to lose him—he and I had latched onto each other to be best friends since we met. This wasn't fair…how could I leave them like this? I mean I knew that I had to but…it just hurt all over.

"I can't believe how calm you are," he said, and the tears came for both of us, hugging each other again.

"I can't either." I admitted softly. "Andrew's been a good guide—he's much more of a guardian angel than he is a reaper."

"That's sweet, Lana." Andrew said aloud.

Sam looked up at Andrew and gave a nod. "Thank you for taking care of her."

"It was pleasure." Andrew replied with a smile.

"I'm going to always love you," I said, looking Sam in the eye. "For me to have no unfinished business, I have to say this, okay?"

"Say what?" Sam asked me.

I took a breath. "I will always love you more than a brother, or a friend but less than a lover. You and I understand each other, and I love that about us. We have this really beautiful bond and I know that people mistake it for something else a lot, but we know what it is, you know? We know that we're soul mates in a way and when I'm gone, I want you to remember to not let Kate go…she loves you. She loves you so much more than anyone except me, I just love you in a different way. Hold onto her…"

Sam smiled at me and stroked my hair, nodding as he tried hard not to cry in front of me. He watched as I wiped my tears away and then he nodded a little more and I knew that with Sam and Lance, there was no unfinished business. We understood each other, and that was the only thing that I could ask for…it was the only thing that was going to make this even a _smidge_ less hard.

"I understand the feeling, perfectly, Lanni," he replied smiling. "Ditto…be good to my brother when he comes here, okay?"

"Of course I will be," I nodded and smiled, kissing his forehead. "Now please…live. Don't let this bring you down, all right? Live…for me…"

"All right," Sam promised me.

I hugged him tightly to me one last time and then I muttered the incantation and he rippled back onto the other plane. When he was returned I had just enough time to compose myself before Kate, Annie and Jen appeared to me. I was thankful that they were together, and yet I still wished I could see Kevin, but he was in Kansas with the girls and Kalli and Kat were together too, not here.

"Kevin called and told me to tell you how much he's going to miss you. Even with the bickering, he always liked you." Jen told me.

I smiled and nodded. "Tell him I always liked him too."

Jen smiled at that and nodded and I was thankful for that—Kevin was a part of my family too, even though I never talked to him nearly enough. Still, knowing that he liked me and I liked him was enough, and when Annie came right up to me and hugged me fiercely, I felt the tears coming again. I hugged her back tightly, kissing her head and nodding slowly because I understood.

"We got jipped on time," Annie said sadly.

I nodded slowly. "That we did."

"I wish we'd come sooner." Jen told me. "We could have saved you."

"This was inevitable," I replied with a shrug. "Don't blame yourselves for anything."

"If you have to blame anyone, blame me," Kate said dismally. "Kat and Kalli will never forgive me, you know…"

I turned to Kate and gave her a stern look through my tears, opening up my arms for her and smiling when she fell into them. Holding her close to me I kissed her head, nuzzling her gently and then pulling back and looking her square in the eye. I did _not_ want her to blame herself for _any _of this and yet it suddenly dawned on me that she had been quiet through all of this because she thought that she hadn't gotten to me in time.

"You did everything that you could," I told her, kissing her forehead. "Thank you for being here with me all this time, Kate. You take care of Sam, okay? Don't you leave him and don't let Dean do anything really stupid, okay?"

Kate nodded and squeezed my shoulders. "I promise."

"Man…you three are like my favorite people and I can't…I don't think I have all of the words," I said, crying and talking all at once.

I hugged my sister again tightly for a little bit and then Annie pulled away from me and let Jen have her moment too. I wrapped my arms around my closest and oldest friend and I kissed her, nodding when she kissed me back. She then pulled away and held me at arm's length, her eyes wet and she smiled at me.

"Wow," she said, nodding. "I always thought we'd be old when one of us died."

I nodded and laughed a little. "Well what with always fighting demons, one of us was sure to bite it early."

"But you were murdered…there's a difference." Annie said and I nodded and pulled all three of them close to me, knowing it was time to be a little more serious, so they perked up their ears as I swallowed.

"Hey…I want Dean to be the one to tell them to take me off of life support, but since I doubt he will, make sure it happens." I explained to them. "I know it's going to be hard for him, but he has to let go as much as I do. When I send him back, I want it done…I want to stop making my body hang on when it can't and I want my organs to be harvested and donated, all right?"

Jen nodded quickly. "Promise, Lan, and I've already, as sad as it sounds, picked out a white dress for you."

"Thanks, Sweetheart, I trust your judgment." I assured her, not wanting to cry anymore just yet.

"And we've arranged to have you buried near Bethany, Marcus, my dad and Casey," Annie added slowly. "We thought that was what you would want."

I nodded and kissed their heads. "It is…send him on in, please. I don't want to hold on too much longer when my body is giving out."

I was feeling a pain in my chest, and I knew it was because my heart was working to keep my body alive, and my body wasn't meant to hold on. This was just one of those things that had to happen and I was actually ready to face it…I just needed to finish this first. I didn't want anymore stress on the organs I was going to donate, but I wasn't leaving until I got to see Dean. He was my everything and he needed to understand that in more detail before I could fully move on.

"We love you, Lan," Jen told me sincerely.

I smiled at her, Kate and Annie. "And I love all three of you…_so_ much."

They smiled and we waved, and then they rippled out, and Dean rippled in—he had wanted to be last. He wanted to convince me to hold on, but I was far from convinced that this was for the better. A tear trickled out of his eye and hit the floor, before he kissed me. I knew this was his way of trying to resolve everything between us, and I gave in, crying a little, him doing the same.

I'd never really seen Dean really and honestly just cry to tell you the honest truth. Tears had come before, yes, and there were dry heaves, and the illusion of crying, but he was always so hard about it. To kiss him while he failed to hold back the sobs that were escaping, was heartbreaking and yet inspiring. He was so beautiful…he deserved so much…and as much as I was going to miss everyone else, I was going to miss him most of all and I knew it.

"I can't lose you," he whispered to me, and he kissed me again as I ran my fingers through his hair, trying to keep my own sobs at bay.

"You have to pull the plug, Dean. I know this is going to be hard on you, but you have to let me go." I said, sadly, wiping his tears away, as he wiped mine away and looked me in the eye as our kiss halted.

"I can't lose someone else," he told me softly. "Baby, you can't die."

I closed my eyes and smiled as his lips touched my forehead. "Dean, my body is battered and broken. My organs are failing—I'm not waking up from this. You have to put me out of my misery."

Dean held me to him tightly, stroking my hair and kissing my head, and we both cried as we stood there. We didn't want to let each other go but we had to and we both knew that deep down, but we held onto one another for what seemed like forever before the pain in my chest hit again, only this time a lot worse than it had before. My body was failing me…I had to finish up my 'goodbye' and I had to let them go…I had to let _Dean_ go.

"Please, Dean," I told him.

He kissed me again, and nodded. "You're my everything…"

I nodded and wiped a tear away. "You're my everything too. I'll always be with you even though I won't be right beside you."

He ran his hand down his face and then kissed me one last time before I muttered the incantation, sending him back to his world. I watched as Dean called the doctor in, and reluctantly told him to go ahead and take me off of life support, and Annie and Lance jumped in about the organ donation. After the organs were harvested and Annie claimed the body, I smiled at them as they sat in the waiting room in silence, some crying, and some smiling as they thought of good times, and I turned to Andrew.

"I'm ready," I replied, a tear rolling down my cheek.

Andrew nodded, and then he made a surprised noise when I hugged him. "That doesn't normally happen. People aren't too happy to know they're dead."

"You were the perfect guide," I told him as I pulled away and smiled at him. "So…what do I do now?"

Andrew smiled too and stroked my hair. "Let go…"

I nodded as the tears rolled down my cheeks and I looked back at my family and friends and I smiled at them through the sadness. They would make it without me…I knew they would…I just had to keep my promise now. I said my final 'goodbyes' that they couldn't hear and I did just what Andrew told me to do…I moved on.

xx

**Annie's POV**

The funeral was nice—it was sunny outside, and though all of us were crying, it was all right because we knew she had to be in a better place now. We knew Lana had moved on and would be fine…the only part that was weighing on any of us, was that Dean didn't want to talk about her. Didn't want her name to be mentioned. If one of us mentioned her, he left the room. It was getting bad.

"Do you want to put the handful of dirt on the coffin?" I asked Dean.

He just knelt down and picked up the dirt, tossing it onto the coffin and then he straightened up and watched as Lance and Sam shoveled the rest of the dirt into the hole, and Kate, Jen and I stayed behind, Jen's arm over my shoulders, everyone else going back home. We'd been here for a while, but Kate, Jen and I were just amazed she was gone. We were even more amazed that Dean was actually letting go. We knew about his and Lana's 'goodbye'…we were also kind of flabbergasted when he put her engagement ring on a silver chain, and put it around her neck before we put her in the coffin. He'd buried everything he'd loved most in this world.

"What do we do now?" I asked aloud.

Jen shrugged slowly. "I don't know, Annie. It's going to take some getting used to."

"Especially what with Kate probably going to convince Sam and Dean to take off and hunt again even if it's without Lana," I explained to her.

Jen nodded and we walked along. "So you think there may be something to fear?"

"No!" I told her, shaking my head vigorously. "I think that after all of this time with them, she knows what is and isn't best for Sam at least…right?"

"Do you still kind of sort of have a crush on Sam?" Jen asked me with a little laugh. "I know you kind of fancied him a little."

I rolled my eyes at her. "You're not British, Jen, you don't get to use the word 'fancied'."

"Okay, Annie," she laughed, "so…what do we do for the rest of the day?"

It was honestly a simple enough question but for some reason I just couldn't wrap my head around it. I was going to have to figure out something to do _without_ Lana here to weigh in on anything and it was strange. What was even stranger was that without Lana around…her house was mine. The house that she loved so much…that she missed whenever she was out hunting. How was I going to get through that?

"Take them to the house and make them food?" I suggested to Jen.

Jen smiled at that. "I'll get the girls ready to come on over then."

I nodded, and went to the house that Lana had rebuilt after the fire, and Sam and Dean followed me inside. Dean wasn't in a talking mood. He didn't want food. He just went straight upstairs and laid down on Lana's bed. This wasn't _just_ Lana's house…Dean felt like it was his home too and without Lana in it…without her Dean didn't want to do much of anything. Not since he'd tracked down and slaughtered the demon that had done this to her in the first place.

"I'm worried about him," I told Sam.

Sam nodded slowly. "I don't think he's ever loved someone this much before."

"So he's torturing himself by spending time in her room?" I asked him.

"It's not that simple, Annie." Sam explained to me, a sad smile on his face. "You see…the first day we met Lan at Chelsea's wake? We came back here, and those two had a lot of scotch, and slept together—in _that_ room, on _that_ bed. It's a very important thing for him…and it helps him to still feel close to Lan."

I nodded sadly. "Yeah…so, what do you think he'll eat?"

"I'm not sure," Sam replied with a shrug. "Normally he just eats everything you know, but this…Lan dying has really messed him up. Kate couldn't even get alcohol in him."

"Ouch," I told him. "Oh, hey…if Jo maybe randomly showed because of a hunt…?"

Sam looked at me and shrugged. "Not sure, actually. I mean she and Ellen know right? Lana is very close to them and I just…Lan never really liked that Jo had a thing for Dean, but she still liked her. With Lan dead and Dean in this mood?"

"Oh, he's not sleeping with anyone else for a really long time," Kate said as she came into the kitchen with us, getting herself some water.

"Why is that?" I asked her slowly. "I mean, I guess I just expect him to hop right on along since it would numb the pain."

Kate smiled and shook her head. "No. He loved her way too much to soil her memory like that."

xx

**Dean's POV**

Everything smelled like her…_everything_. I had no more tears to shed—I had already cried so much and I was a man, for God's sake, so I needed to find a better way to handle this, right? It was just that she was _actually_ gone…and she wasn't coming back this time. This wasn't just some prank that Victoria was playing on us for fun…I was _really _alone…again. I hadn't felt this alone since Dad died, and when that had happened, I had had Lana with me and she had gotten me through it. I didn't care about anything bad that we had done to each other, or any of the things that we had put each other through anymore…I just missed her…I missed her so much.

Just looking at her room brought back memories that I wasn't sure I could really handle just yet. Everything spoke to who she was and what she believed and even though I felt close to her, I felt like my whole chest was being ripped apart. It was so cozy and perfect, and homey all at once…it was so Lana, and I loved it. I loved being in here because it was just her…and it was all I needed for now.

She had a desk that had old things in it and so I got off of the bed and opened the drawers. Some had pictures of her when she was younger with her parents and even though she seemed so happy in them she also seemed so lost. I was sad that the pictures we had of the two of us together were so few—I didn't like it when people got in my face with a camera. Even so, on her desk, in a picture frame, was a picture she'd taken lying next to me in bed, my favorite of her pajamas on, and I was sleeping. It made me smile a little because out of all the funny faced pictures of us…this one was her favorite.

"You are so beautiful, Lanni," I whispered, and set the picture down, finding a Bible in her top drawer. "And you have so much faith."

"Dean?" Sam asked me suddenly, having come into the room.

I swallowed. "Yeah?"

"Annie wants you to eat," he told me.

I just nodded slowly, my eyes fixed on the Bible in my hand, and then I put it back down on the desk as Sam and I stood in silence. When I had done that I found yet another copy of a Shakespeare play and I couldn't help but smile a little—Lana loved her Shakespeare. Sometimes she had even tried to read it aloud to me and I'd whine and complain about the injustice of being forced to listen to it. I mean really, right kind of person writes like that? How do people understand it?

"It's homemade tuna," Sam tried again.

"Yeah," I told him with a nod. "Okay."

I opened up her closet as Sam sighed, and set the plate on the desk and left the room. Even without her here, her clothes smelled like her and I really just couldn't get enough of them. One of the shirts in the closet was the one that she had worn when Sam told her she was part of the team…the day that she officially became part of Sam's and my life. She looked so beautiful with the sunlight in her hair…I missed that.

"I miss you," I told the closet, and then I stepped over to the radio and ran my fingers along it.

I figured it wouldn't hurt to listen to the last station that Lana had had it on, and so I turned it on. I listened to a couple commercials go by as I went over to the bed and laid down on it, and then a song came on that I found myself focusing on. The announcer said it was _**Heaven Forbid**_ by the Fray.

**Twenty years it's breaking you down**

**Now that you understand there's no one around.**

**Take a breath, just take a seat**

**You're falling apart and tearing at the seams.**

**Heaven forbid you end up alone and don't know why**

**Hold on tight wait for tomorrow, you'll be alright**

**It's on your face, is it on your mind**

**Would you care to build a house of your own.**

**How much longer, how long can you wait**

**It's like you wanted to go and give yourself away.**

**Heaven forbid you end up alone and don't know why**

**Hold on tight wait for tomorrow, you'll be alright.**

**It feels good.**

**Is that reason enough for you.**

**It feels good.**

**Is that reason enough for you.**

**Heaven forbid you end up alone and don't know why**

**Hold on tight wait for tomorrow, you'll be alright**

**Heaven forbid you end up alone and don't know why**

**Hold on tight wait for tomorrow, you'll be alright**

**Out of this one**

**Don't know how to get you out of this one**

**Don't know how to get you out of this one**

**Don't know how to get you out of this one**

**Don't know how to get you out of this one**

I looked up at the ceiling and I smiled a little, then looked at the tuna on the desk—there was no use in letting it sit there and go to waste. So I got up to go and eat it, bringing it back to the bed. When I was finished, I thought about some of the old times with Lana because my memories were all that I had now. The one that kept coming to mind was when she and I were expecting the baby and I was falling hard for her…that damned woman had a hold over me that I just couldn't ignore.

_Lana smiled as I kissed her neck, our wet naked bodies pressed against each other in the tub. She was sitting on me, and I had realized that since she had told me she was pregnant, I needed to be near her more often. I hadn't been able to vocalize to her how I felt about having a baby with her, but I knew that it was **my **job to keep Lana safe, and that if she **really **wanted this baby…then I would be here for her._

"_Dean…" She breathed._

_I kissed her neck swiftly and looked up into her eyes, smiling at her and cupping her face with my hand—she was so beautiful. Lana ran her fingers over my wet hair and rested her forehead against mine and I smiled happily. I loved that she loved being so close to me, and I hoped it would never stop…she was the only woman I wanted to be this close to, and I never wanted it to stop._

"_I'm so glad I have you." I whispered to her._

_She smiled at me even though it wasn't an 'I love you'. "I'm glad I have you too."_

_I kissed her softly and then even though I made a face at first when she pulled her lips back, I smiled when she made a trail of kisses to my neck. The sucking sensation and her fingers running along my skin felt **amazing **and I couldn't deny myself of her. She never seemed to mind either, so after a little fun in the tub we went and got dressed in our pajamas, Sam still out of the large hotel room that Lana had insisted we get this time around in order to wind down._

"_Come here," I told her once her nightgown was on._

_Lana walked over to me and leaned into me, our fingers entwining at our sides and our lips touching. We kissed each other softly, our fingers running along each other's hands and our lips massaging each other's. She had me, and she could get me to do whatever it was that she wanted me to do and she knew it, but she never took advantage of it…and **that **was what made her so different from all the rest of the women I had ever been with._

"_Dance with me?" She asked me._

"_I don't really dance." I told her, but the look on her face made me nod slowly. "For you though, I'd do anything."_

_She smiled at me. "**Anything**?"_

"_Within reason," I replied with a chuckled, swaying along with her body as the song Lana had dubbed as ours came on._

"_You know, you dance fine, so I wonder why you don't do it more often." Lana said softly._

_I smiled at that and shrugged a little, holding her body close to mine, and then I closed my eyes and rested my forehead against hers as she looked up at me. This was nice…to be able to be **this** close to another person and know that they'd always be with you. I never wanted it to end…but at the same time I didn't want to get her hurt._

"_Make love to me?" She whispered, running her nose along mine._

_I chuckled softly. "1) that's cheesy, and 2) isn't that all we've been doing today?"_

_Lana shrugged, smirking. "And hasn't it been marvelous?"_

_I kissed her softly, my hands slowly going down her body, deepening our kiss and slowly lifting up her nightgown, the smooth satin running against her legs. We would have gotten farther if Sam hadn't walked in the room and the sound of the door made me drop Lana's nightgown and point to my brother before breaking the kiss._

"_You should learn to knock," I told him, kissing Lana swiftly once more before Sam shut the door behind him._

"_Maybe you two should get a separate room. I think you two were in this position when I left this morning." Sam said with a laugh._

_Lana blushed and bit her lip. "Trust me we have been in many since then. Not much thinking with the upstairs brain going on."_

_Sam laughed a little as he shook his head, and I couldn't help but smile at him—he was **honestly** happy that **I **was happy. He was always there for me, and he was behind my relationship with Lana no matter what happened. Having support like that was definitely something I had missed…they were my family, and the three of us would get through **anything **if we were **together**._

_The three of us got into bed, Sam crawling into his and turning off the light, me crawling in and holding Lana to me, my hand on her stomach. There was life in there, and I wasn't sure **exactly **how I felt about that yet but…part of me was definitely oddly **happy**.Lana snuggled into me and I ran my fingers through her hair, kissing her head softly and smiling._

"_No matter what happens, I want you to trust in the fact that I would do anything for you. To me, the act of loving you is more wonderful and miraculous than the act of living." Lana whispered to me._

_I chuckled a little. "That was the mushiest thing you have said to me all day, Miss Meckenzie."_

"_Yeah…but I mean it," she whispered softly, placing her hands on mine on her stomach. "My future is you. I look in your eyes, and all I see is you."_

"_I love you," I told her, and though the words she had said sunk in and I was glad she'd said them, I was kind of grateful that saying 'I love you' had gotten her to just whisper it back and drift off to sleep…our relationship was getting deep._

Just thinking about it brought tears to my eyes and I had to close them just to keep her image ingrained in my mind. I really missed her…a _lot_.

xx

**Annie's POV**

Jen was with us the next afternoon and I felt like things were about to get a lot more interesting. Kate's red hair was pulled back and she was wearing jeans and a white tank blouse, and was more chipper than we were, but she still felt bad. She was trying desperately to try to get everyone to just remember that there was life to live and Lana wanted us all to live it and while we all agreed, we were mopey.

"Today is a day in which we should all be doing something productive," Kate informed us, kissing Sam's lips swiftly. "Something that involves leaving the house…_all_ of us."

Sam nodded slowly. "I agree, but I don't think that we'll get Dean to agree at all."

"He's been upstairs all day." I explained to her. "He's—he's not doing very well without her."

"Well let's bring him down and we can all eat some food." Kate said, really trying to be helpful…and it was working.

"He keeps saying he's not hungry," I told her. "Sam and I have taken him food, but I dunno what's up."

Kate reached out her arm and wrapped it around me, leaning her head on mine and nodding at that. She was used to death and I knew she was going to be able to help us out here, and I was glad to have her here. This was just what I needed—to be surrounded with family that loved me, since Lana was gone.

"He lost the love of his life," Kate said softly. "Let's just drag him down here because as beautiful as the sentiment is, we can't let him waste away up there."

I nodded slowly. "You're right, Kate."

"I know I am," she replied with a smile.

Sam chuckled as Jen and I smiled at her, and then he went upstairs to bring Dean down since he thought it was _his_ place to do so. Though it took a good fifteen minutes, Dean came down the stairs and Sam came down behind him, Dean stopping when he saw how many of us were all here. He must have felt like it was some kind of intervention, which it kind of was, and the look on his face really said it all.

"I'll eat up in my room if you don't mind," Dean told us before going back upstairs even though we were all protesting.

"Lana had him from the moment they met." Kate said with a smile on her face. "It's really very cute if you ask me."

Sam smiled and nodded. "It really is nice to know."

"Still…we need to get him out and about because this isn't healthy for him and it's not bringing her back," Kate explained. "I'm worried about him…"

Sam smiled at her and nodded because it was obvious Kate cared about Dean and I realized in that moment that I actually wasn't as jealous as I thought I was going to be…Kate had a heart. She had morals and she pretty much _never_ had one-night stands and Sam…Sam needed someone like her. Someone stable…someone who had a habit of making everyone around her feel safe and home…it was just that like us, she had a troubled past. Maybe even a _more_ troubled past. It wasn't even a secret past, she just hated to talk about it…so did Sam and Dean even know about it?

"I'm going to go check on Dean," Sam told us, and then he went up the stairs.

I looked up after him "Let's make Dean some food…it's what Lana would want."

**Note: Okay and there is the sad chapter. I mean there will be sad chapters of this story in the future, but DAMN…this chapter hurts me. Hope is on the horizon though! Another chapter in a couple of hours. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	25. Reborn

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay so here is another chapter and I think you guys will love/hate it. We start with Kate, and then the POV eventually makes it to the person we all miss and love…**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Kate's POV**

Everything seemed so much quieter without Lana around. There were things I hadn't told anyone about when I got here that Lana had taken with her to her grave and I was starting to feel…lonely. I couldn't trust Annie with them and I didn't have Kalli or Kat with me, so I felt like there were things that I couldn't really do anymore. I just…I just wanted her back because on top of it all, Sam needed her and while he had me, it just wasn't the same as having your best friend around.

"You want some tuna, Kate?" Annie asked me.

I looked up and nodded. "Um…sure…"

"It's the only thing Dean seems to eat, because Lana never ate it. He won't drink coffee, or milk, or juice, but he'll drink water. He won't eat ice cream, or pasta, or anything substantial, or touch candy. The only thing he'll eat is tuna—which Lana ate, just not around him so he doesn't know. Don't tell him though! Otherwise he won't eat anything, and he'll starve to death." Annie said dismally, handing me a plate with a tuna sandwich on it.

I smiled at her. "We need to do something other than let him sit in that room all day."

"I know, but I'm plum out of ideas." Annie agreed, nodding her head vigorously. "He doesn't even want to see Kaydee and Minah because they remind him of how much Lana loved them and wanted kids of her own, and yeah…something needs to be done."

"How much past do you and Annie have?" Sam asked suddenly.

I looked up as he walked into the room and I shrugged a little because the question had come out of nowhere and I didn't know how to answer it. I mean where was Sam even _going_ with this, and why? Wasn't it more important for us to focus on Dean and how he was wasting away up in Lana's room doing…well nothing?

"Uh…not much," I explained to him. "I mean, Annie and Kat have more past than anyone because while she and Kat got to see each other even though Lana thought Annie was gone, I hunted more than I stayed at home with the family."

Annie nodded slowly. "That's why I went back to stay with them for a bit—I missed Kat. She's only a year younger than me."

"I have the feeling you both know things that you aren't telling me," Sam said slowly. "I mean you don't have to tell me, but…I dunno…I'm just out of the loop."

"Well, Sammy, you're just going to have to be nice, and maybe we'll reward you," I told him, smiling a little.

I was trying to joke around because he was right: there was a giant secret that I was keeping from him and Dean and maybe I should tell them it was just that I had promised that I wouldn't. That, and there was still some stuff about me that I hadn't quite explained and I didn't think that now was the time for this. We could care and share once we had all properly mourned Lana and that was that.

"Kate…" Annie said, looking at me and then at Sam. "Lana took a lot of things to the grave with her that don't have to do with her, okay? She even knows things that she didn't know that she knew. Kate's mother accidentally let that slip."

I sighed a little bit. "Florence…she locked away some of Lana's memories for safe keeping because they're dangerous."

"Dangerous how?" Sam asked slowly, sitting down.

"Dangerous, about her father, dangerous," I explained slowly.

That was all that I felt like I could say, so I decided to change the subject because I knew that Annie was curious. I trusted Sam and I loved being near him and the sex was fantastic, but at the same time I was feeling what everyone else felt at one point or another—even Dean. Now that she was dead, I felt like it wouldn't hurt to ask, would it?

"I have a question for you, Sammy," I told him.

"Yeah?" Sam asked as he started to stroke my hair.

I took a breath. "How much did you love Lana?"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked, obviously caught off guard and pulling his hand away to get a better look at me.

Yeah, the look on his face was _definitely_ making me feel like I had touched on something he had wanted to keep hidden and my stomach flopped in an unpleasant way. The boy loved Lana and I knew it—it was all in the way he mourned her…the way he _had_ been mourning her. The problem was, that I wanted to know if there had ever been any unresolved feelings between them and Annie wanted to know as well.

I laughed a little. "Sammy, it's obvious from the way you say her name. How much did you love her? How romantically involved were the two of you? These things have to come out eventually."

"I told you before, Katie," Sam said, face close to mine. "Lan and I have never been romantically anything. We flirted a bit before she and Dean got together but there was never more than platonic love there. She was my family…I feel like I not only lost my best friend, but my sister."

I nodded as he kissed my lips tenderly and then my forehead, Annie nodding and leaving the room. Honestly? I had known that she kind of had a crush on Sam and this was hard for her to watch, but Sam was mine and I was totally alright with marking my territory with him. Still, Sam ever wanted to make everyone happy and went off after her to explain things and I looked up as Dean came down the stairs finally.

"What the Hell?" Dean asked.

I shrugged and smiled a little. "Annie's in a mood and Sam is trying to fix it."

"I can see that…" Dean nodded slowly. "Is there anymore tuna?"

"Dean…do you want to talk about her?" I asked him.

"I could have sworn Annie said there was more tuna," Dean said, changing the subject.

I nodded and paused before continuing. "It's okay to want to talk about her."

"Look…Kate…I don't. Stop…" Dean replied, and I nodded.

"Fine…have _my_ tuna sandwich. I wasn't really hungry when Annie offered I just didn't want to hurt her feelings." I said, smiling at him.

He slowly came over and sat down next to me and I made a face—the guy smelled. I understood that right now the only thing that was important to him was being where Lana had called home, but…it was called bathing. He looked at me as I scooted to the opposite end of the couch and he raised his eyebrows at me.

"You need to shower," I told him.

"I don't smell that…" He began, sniffing his armpit and then making a face, "…okay…maybe I do."

I laughed a little. "It's okay, it's normal."

"There's nothing normal about this!" Dean exclaimed suddenly. "She was killed by a demon and she didn't deserve to die! Nothing that happened to her was ever normal and this is my forte! Demons! I should have been able to save her, okay?!"

I felt sorry for him. He loved her so much, and she was ripped away from him, and honestly it wasn't fair and it _wasn't_ okay. There had to be something I could do here to make all of this better and fast. Well there was, but it was dangerous…so dangerous in fact, that I wanted a good reason to do it and in order to be backed up, I was going to need some support.

"You know what? I'm going to go and check on Annie too." I told Dean, standing up and squeezing his shoulder reassuringly.

Dean just nodded, looking sorry for yelling, but not saying anything about it vocally and I was all right with that. He wasn't really one for caring and sharing, _or _for apologizing, so I was just going to let it go since he was mourning the love of his life and right now he deserved to be cut some slack. I went out in the back yard, only to see Jen talking to Annie, and I overheard part of their conversation.

"The Rune, Annie…we can't activate it. I've been trying to figure it out for months, and I realized why it doesn't work—only a demon can activate it." Jen explained to her. "One who knows the craft…"

"Oh," Annie said, disappointed and surprised. "Wow. Well what about Chelsea? She's got vampiric blood so that's half demon, isn't it?"

Jen shook her head. "Not how vampire blood works, honey, and even if we could find a half demon like Lana, it would take two half demons to activate it, I think. We need the Rune, Annie. It holds the secrets to the demon population—to your past."

"We can't _trust_ any demons, and we don't know any other half demons," Annie said, thoroughly annoyed.

"Lana's half demon," I told them.

Jen gave me a look. "Kate, Lana is dead."

"For now," I told them, nodding slowly, "I know how to bring her back."

"Kate…" Jen warned, but I shook my head.

"No, Jen, no," I said sadly. "Look, we have no idea where she went or what happens when we die and she was important to all of us and taken before her time. I'm not talking about a crossroads deal or anything, I'm talking about witchcraft. She belongs here, with the living and I'm not going to leave her in the ground! I'm going to bring her back, but I need your help…"

xx

**Third Person**

Sam and Dean left after a while to go on a hunt because it was no longer all right for them to be hanging out in Lana's house—Sam wanted Dean out and about. Besides, it had been a while since Lana had passed and the plan had to be executed _without _the boys knowing what was going on. Kate promised to meet up with them and sent Sam off with long, loving kiss, Sam missing her already but wanting to focus on his brother and getting his brother better. Annie, Kate and Jen planned on what they were going to do, and finally decided. It was risky…it was dangerous…it had ramifications—bad things could happen—but they wanted to do it.

Kate, Annie and Jen put candles around the dug up coffin in a circle, having told no one about this plan. They smiled a little to themselves as they poured the salt around the candles, and then sat on either side of the coffin and began to chant in low tones, tossing their heads back, blood on their faces in symbols on their cheeks—they were dealing with darker magic than normal.

The winds picked up, their final words causing the candles to blow out simultaneously, and then they looked at each other, their eyes glowing in the dark, fading to normal as the salt ring suddenly became a ring of fire, and white mist came down from the sky and swirled around above the picture of Lana on top of the coffin before it flew under the crack, and everything went pitch black once again.

Looking at each other this time, each of them expected something big to happen. Inside the coffin, dying flesh was renewed, organs began to move, and everything ever wrong with Lana, was fixed…she had been reborn. As soon as everything had been replaced and renewed, her eyes shot open and her lungs heaved.

xx

**Lana's POV**

I coughed loudly, gasping for air, tasting only that of stale, depleted oxygen. What was going on here? I was dead…well, I knew I had been at least. I had let go. I had moved on. I had gone to a better place. That was all I remembered…I remembered being happy and warm. I would have screamed when the coffin opened, but as I peered up into the faces of Kate, Annie and Jen, I understood—they had brought me back to life.

"You okay, Lan?" Jen asked me.

I sat up, gasping and breathing in the beautiful, fresh air around me, and I nodded, coughing a little more. I mean honestly I was trying to remember everything that had happened to me…but I couldn't. I knew who the girls were standing around me and I knew I had been dead but…I didn't know much else.

"Holy shit," I said aloud.

"Well at least we know we brought Lanni back," Annie told Jen, and they helped me climb out of the coffin.

Kate held onto me. "Can you stand on your own?"

For being dead a while, I was surprised that I _could_ stand, but at the same time, not surprised at all—weirder things had…actually…weirder things _hadn't_ happened. This was weird—weirder than alien abduction by far. Then again…how long had I _been_ dead? I remembered spells…and hunting…but what else? There were gaps in my memory that I didn't understand.

"How long was I dead?" I asked them.

"A good month," Jen explained to me. "You prolly started to decay down there already."

I nodded slowly. "What did this spell entail?"

"Well…we had to kill a lamb," Annie told me, making a face. "It was your everyday, ordinary, borderline-dark-magic, magic."

I looked at them. "So what…I'm like reborn?"

I was trying to make sense of everything, and at the same time remember things as I looked around the cemetery. I understood magic…but not in as great detail and it was the same way with the hunting. I knew I had done it and what it was but…there were definitely no specifics here and I knew that could be a bad sign…right?

"We brought you back for selfish reasons too," Jen told me dismally.

I shook my head. "No, it's okay…I just want to make sure that I'm me."

"Well…we have no idea about that," Kate admitted slowly.

"I mean you're in perfect health. Your body has been remade—meaning it has no scars from miscarriages, or when you've been impaled or hurt yourself when you were little—nothing. You're perfect. However, being borderline-dark-magic, the demon part of you may have come back stronger than before—well it did come back stronger, but we don't know how much stronger. You're—you're going to be different, Lan." Jen explained.

I nodded slowly. "So, I've still got a fragmented knowledge of everything that's happened, I still have my powers, I'm still half demon, but…but I'm more…dark? Is that about what you're saying?"

"Yeah…that's about what we're saying," Annie told me.

Okay…so I wasn't _entirely_ me…whoever _me_ was anymore. That was what I needed to figure out, and I needed to figure it out fast. I mean alright so I had powers and I had a dark side kind of and I needed to remember everything…how was I going to do that? I needed to know how I was going to go back to being…well me.

"And that's not all, Lan," Jen told me.

"What more is there?" I asked her slowly, not sure I really wanted to know.

Annie took a deep breath. "I found Mom…and…nobody knows we did this…just Kate, me and Jen."

"You mean you left Mom in the dark?" I asked her.

"We left everyone in the dark," Jen admitted to me. "We knew we could bring you back, but we also knew you'd be different—knew everyone would try to talk us out of it…maybe even go out of their way to try and stop us and we couldn't let them do that. You're—you're Lana, but you're not Lana."

"I'm a darker version of Lana," I said, letting it sink in. "Meaning that I'm more susceptible now to the 'dark side of the force' as Yoda would put it. Or rather, 'the dark side of the force, more susceptible, am I'."

Annie hugged me. "What matters is you're back."

I nodded slowly and took a deep breath as Annie held me tightly to her and I returned the hug—I knew we were close somehow. Some things felt a little more familiar to me as the girls talked to me, and some things were still fuzzy.

I took a deep breath. "Yeah…I'm back. How are we going to deal with—"

"—the authorities?" Annie asked and nodded when I did. "Jen and I already have them writing about how you had to be kept safe from an angry psycho. We even staged a suicide so it was thought the man who killed you repented, with a demon—one we actually killed—and it's all taken care of."

I pulled away from Annie and looked at her, Kate and Jen. "I don't remember much of anything. I know names, and I remember pieces of my past, but…I was gone so long."

"If we'd waited any longer, you wouldn't remember anything." Kate explained with a nod. "If you hear, see, or smell big things that were significant, it'll bring memories back. Plus we have your mother and she's good at memory things…"

"That's a relief." I told her, and then I smiled. "Oh, and Kate—you look good."

Kate smiled at me fondly. "So do you…for a dead girl."

xx

When I got to the house, I was astonished—Mom was definitely our Mom, just a bit more worn around the edges, so to speak. She had dark hair like Annie and I, and she seemed so warm and friendly even though she hadn't been there really—that much I remembered. Why she had left us all those years ago was still unknown, but when I saw her, I had the urge to hug her. Because of my fragmented memory, all I could think of was that I remembered her warmth before she left Annie and I with Bethany and Marcus…and she had always loved us.

"Mom," I breathed as I hugged her.

"There's my girl," she hugged me back strongly, and stroked my hair as I held her, her voice warm and welcoming. "I figured Kate, Annie and Jen would bring you back."

I pulled away slowly and looked her in the eye, smiling at her as my own eyes seemed to peer back at me. I definitely looked like my mother, but at the same time I knew where I got my qualities from my father when he had been possessing my mother…there was that part I was going to have to contend with. I was filled up with demon blood and I honestly didn't want to know how dark I could be so I was just going to leave myself in the dark there and get _other_ answers if I wanted them.

"He said his goodbyes," Mom said softly.

I looked down at my white dress as mother held the ring in her hand, and I realized that Dean had put the ring on a chain and buried me with it around my neck. I realized that Dean and I had something more special than I could remember—there were only fragmented flashes, but I'd loved him once. The last flash I had was of us parting companies. So it was over? Where was he? I felt a strong feeling of need surge through me as I held the ring in my hand.

"I said mine too," I replied slowly, Mom steadying me. "I moved on…I didn't haunt this world because I promised that I wouldn't."

Mom nodded and stroked my cheek. "Your part here isn't done, Lanni."

"I figured as much," I told her nodding. "Do you know anything about this selfish reason Kate, Jen and Annie had to bring me back?"

"The Rune, Lanni," Mom explained to me, taking a deep breath. "They were led to believe that it could only be activated by a demon or two half demons but in reality you just needed to be brought back. You're not necessarily _more _demon, you were just touched with dark magic and that means that it's about time you started practicing your powers because without the right training, you won't be able to resist using these powers for evil. You and I will work on this and I'm going to give you, your memories back, okay?"

I nodded slowly and looked up at her. "Mom…why did I need to be brought back?"

"The angels wanted you back on the mortal plane," Mom said gently. "You have to keep this a secret but angels are real and you are in their debt. A long time ago I started to raise you to be a good person and you turned out to be just that, but at first they wanted you killed. They didn't believe that a half demon child could be raised to be good and so I had to hide you and they found out when you were 18. They almost killed you, but you were proving to be a demon _hunter_ and so they let me keep you…keep an eye on you. Now, they need you for some big master plan that Castiel and Zachariah have yet to fully inform me of, but this was foretold. You are to practice and to master and to vanquish evil. That is how we keep them from ending you."

"So," I began, "in order to save myself I have to become stronger than them? I have to master the demon part and then what? What about when everyone finds out that I'm alive? Can I tell anyone about the angels?"

I didn't really know what I was going to do now that I was alive again and I didn't have all of my memories…what was I going to do? Part of me wanted to find everyone I had been with when I died so I could have them help me out but how was that fair to them? Mom had said it…Dean had moved on and that was that…how could I selfishly try to drag him back into my world? Even with my memories back when Mom gave them to me, I needed to focus on what the angels wanted from me.

"They are out secret until they wish to be know," Mom explained to me. "At any point you can go back to Sam and Dean and hunting, but we need to go over some training first. Not right this second, you need rest…"

"Yeah," I replied, having been brought out of my own thoughts. "I do need some sleep because I feel exhausted but first thing once I'm up and I've eaten, we can start. Wait…what about my memories?"

Mom smiled at me and stroked my hair. "Bobby is sending me the spell book in the mail as we speak. Until then…sweet dreams, Lanni."

I smiled at her and squeezed her hand, hugging her again and smiling more when she kissed my temple. Then I went upstairs to my room and I lay on my bed, turning on the radio and looking at it as a song came on. _**Iris**_ by the Goo Goo Dolls came on and I suddenly found myself breathing in the scent of leather, musk and soap…Dean. Memories started to flood back and I sat up…I loved Dean, and I didn't want to be without him…but how could I when now he could live a good life without me and my demon problems? There was my answer: there was no way that I could get back involved in Dean's life when I had hurt him so much and he had finally moved on.

xx

I woke up the next morning and I walked down in my boxer shorts and my tank top when I was done lying there breathing in the scent that was fading. I'd thought a lot, trying to remember more, but every memory I had made me firmly stick to the belief that this was my second chance…my chance to start over and to be a better person than the one that had hurt such a good man. I fiddled with the ring on the chain around my neck, and I sat on the stool at the counter, looking at Kate as she made breakfast.

"Morning, Lana!" She said cheerfully.

I smiled sadly at her. "Hey…do you think I'm a good person? Did I just lose my way or was I a bitch? What the Hell was I thinking lying to him about being half demon that whole time? Why is it that I found a great guy and then lost him?"

"Whoa, whoa, slow down, Roadrunner." Kate told me, looking bombarded by my questions. "Okay, now _what_ do you want to know?"

"Do you think I'm a good person?" I asked her after a pause, thinking over my list of questions and picking the one I knew I wanted answered most.

Kate laughed a little. "Of course I think you are, but I'm biased because I'm your cousin. Look, you and Dean had a complicated relationship and you _both _screwed up at times. I mean granted your screw-ups were a little worse, but that doesn't make you a bad person, that makes you guarded. It's not as hard for you to let people in as it is for Dean, but it's still hard and you had a lot of secrets to keep that weren't just _yours_—they were _family_ secrets as well. All that matters is Dean forgave you and still wanted to be with you—still wanted to marry you someday."

"Okay," I told her, nodding and taking all of the information in.

I knew that I believed her, but at the same time I really couldn't help it that I was feeling so bad about all of this. For some reason Dean still loved me after all of it, but then again I was dying…he seemed like the kind of guy who would forget _all _of it, just to let me die without regret. That was what did it for me too…I had moved on, so I had coped with and repented for everything I had done…there was no need to dwell on it—just make sure that I _never _made that mistake in the future.

"I guess the only thing left to do is to get in contact with them," Kate told me as she cooked.

"No!" I cried out abruptly.

Kate raised an eyebrow. "Why not?"

"I don't want to see them…not just yet." I told her. "They don't know, do they, because it really is my place to tell them don't you think?"

Kate shook her head. "Nah, they don't know."

"Good," I told her, nodding firmly. "I'm going to just grab some cereal and go back up to my room."

I knew that Kate was worried about me, and a little confused by my outburst, but I needed a little more time to remember. If Sam and Dean were ever going to be involved in my life again, it was unfair to them for me to not remember things I should remember. Besides…my comforters would only smell like Dean for so much longer and I wanted to savor that as long as I could before Mom got the spell book and then gave me all of them back…what would I do then?

"You sure you don't want to eat with us?" Kate asked me. "I mean Annie and Aunt Flor will be back soon. They went to grab some more juice cause we're out."

I shook my head. "That's okay. Tell them I'm sorry, but I need to figure some things out on my own right now."

"Lana?" Kate asked as I went over to the cabinet.

"Yeah?" I asked turning to her.

She sighed a little. "Look, I know it's not my place, but, are you sure you don't want to tell them now? Sooner rather than later?"

"Until I know what to do now, I don't want them to know," I told her honestly. "At this point, I think I just brought drama into their lives you know? Best they don't have to deal with said drama until I can help them through it…and for that I have to help _myself_ through it."

Kate nodded and smiled. "Yeah, I understand that, I guess. Well, if you want, I've made coffee."

I shook my head. "Nah, that's okay."

"You sure? Coffee like runs through your veins…" Kate told me.

"It used to," I told her with a nod.

I grabbed a bowl and poured milk into, pouring some cereal into the bowl and then going upstairs, sitting on my bed and listening to the radio, as I ate. Things had changed and I knew that…but when would they go back to normal? And for me, what _was_ normal?

xx

**Kate's POV**

I sighed as I poured myself some coffee and flipped the pancakes. I didn't get why Lana and Dean were so damn stubborn—it was stupid. They _should_ be talking. She _should_ be calling. He should have been talking about her death, and she should have been on the phone with him right then letting him know that she was around and that she wanted to be with him and work this all out. They were stupid people…stupid, _stupid_ people.

"Where's Lanni?" Annie asked, coming in the door with Aunt Florence.

I looked at the stairs. "Her room…with cereal…"

Annie sighed. "I think I'm ready to call Dean."

"Lana doesn't want us to call him," I told her quickly, shaking my head.

"Why?" Annie asked me raising her eyebrows.

"Because she doesn't want him to know," I replied like she should have gotten that.

I was kind of still annoyed that Lana and Dean were being so damn stubborn and I sighed and apologized to Annie. Honestly I wasn't trying to take it out on anyone, I just…I hated to see people feeling so down and I really thought Sam and Dean could help Lana to get some of her memories back. Isn't that what she wanted? Didn't she _want_ to remember? Besides, I really wanted to be back with Sam because calls and texts between us just weren't enough. I wanted to feel his body right up next to mine and kiss those kips of his and just…I wanted Sam back.

Aunt Florence sighed. "She doesn't want to deal with it, but she has to. She has to talk to him and see him sooner or later, and later isn't better—it's worse. What will he do when he finds out she's been alive for weeks and she never contacted him?"

"I mean once it's all said and done, she'll feel better," Annie added in. "Doesn't she get that?"

I shrugged slowly. "I think she just wants to think of the perfect thing to say."

"Guys?" Lana asked, coming down the stairs.

"Yeah, honey?" Aunt Florence asked her.

Lana took a deep breath. "I've decided to go back to school."

"What?" Annie asked her suddenly.

"Yeah," Lana told them nodding, "I should give college a try. I think I'll sign up for classes, and start tomorrow. Not that hard if you're going to community college."

"But what about the boys?" I asked her.

She bit her lip. "I think I need to find myself first."

xx

**Annie's POV**

I didn't get why Lana wanted to go back to school—it made no sense. She gave school _up_ to fight demons. Gave _up_ her normal life to save other peoples'. We bring her back from the dead and she wants to go to school. What about Dean? Sam? What about hunting? _That_ was where her heart had truly been all this time hadn't it been?

"This is a setback," I told Kate. "Lana is stupid."

Kate nodded and made a face. "Her and Dean both…"

"She just needs time," Mom replied with soft shake of her. You guys _did_ resurrect her."

"Technicality, Mom," I protested. "Lana needs to tell Dean she's alive—simple as that."

"Not that simple, though," Kate said with a sigh.

I turned to her. "What do you mean? I thought you were on _my_ side here about them being stupid."

Kate smiled a little at my choice of words and then she made a face. She was looking for the words to say and it was almost like it was bad and she was trying to sugarcoat it for me. I _hated_ it when people sugarcoated things for me and at the same time…maybe this was _really_ bad.

"Lana's memories aren't coming back the way we wanted them to," she told me finally. "She doesn't remember all of hers and Dean's relationship and she's doubting herself and her ability to make good decisions."

I scoffed and slumped in the chair closest to me. "Well she's proving that she's making really crappy ones!"

"Maybe fate wants it this way," Mom told us. "Maybe this will help Lana look her life over one piece at a time. I want her to make up with the boy she's so madly in love with that loves her, but we have more important things to think about—she has powers to practice and by tomorrow I should be able to give her back her memories and fix this.

Kate nodded slowly. "Least we can do is maybe help this along, can't we?"

"What do you mean?" I asked her, hopeful because Kate always did have pretty great ideas when it came to…well anything.

"I think I should call Sam and tip him off without actually telling him…" Kate said with a smile on her face. "She has to face them if they just show up…"

xx

**Lana's POV**

I woke up from a really weird dream. I had a feeling that it had something to do with old memories, but I wasn't sure. I remembered parts of it…I think I remembered parts of it. It was just weird because it was like High School and hunting all rolled up into one. John was even in it. Getting up, I got dressed and headed off to class in my car. I was only taking two classes, but I really needed to get my mind off of things…it was the only way to move on and clear my head.

"Hi," a blonde girl said, smiling at me.

I smiled back as I locked my car. "Hi."

"I'm Paige," she said holding out her hand.

"I'm Lana," I told her as I shook her hand. "Nice to meet you…"

Paige nodded. "Ditto—so what classes are you taking?"

"Psychology and Mythology," I told her. "I'm just starting out."

Her smile grew. "Me too! I have Mythology today!"

"Me too, Professor…" I pulled out the schedule and looked at it, "…Stearns?"

She nodded too. "Yeah! I can show you to the classroom if you want me to."

I smiled a little more. "That couldn't hurt."

Paige and I went to class and listened to the first day of class, with the rules, and the papers and the introduction to the textbooks—not all that different from High School actually, except that a student came in late—Lance. In High School, Lance and I actually didn't have any classes together…from what I could remember in my scattered memories, we met at lunch and we hung out before and after and on weekends.

He didn't notice me at first, but when he did, his eyes widened and I could understand that: I had been dead. After class, Paige gave me her number, and told me to keep in touch this quarter, and then Lance showed up next to me as my new study buddy left me there. He looked like he wanted to pull silver out on me or something, and I just let him drag me outside under a tree.

"Wow," He said, looking me over with his eyes. "You're alive."

I nodded slowly. "Seems so…"

"How? No, wait—Jen and Annie," he replied, answering his own question and nodding knowingly.

"And Kate…you remember her," I told him with a small smile. "Seems it's not time for me to die yet and my real Mom, by the way, is back in the mix and is living at my house right now."

"Wow," Lance said again, "a lot has changed in a month."

I nodded slowly. "Yeah…so forgive me but really all I remember is that we dated in High School and we've been friends for a long time."

"I asked you to marry me at graduation and you said 'no'," he told me. "Figures you wouldn't remember _that _though…"

I smiled a little and told him I was sorry but he waved it off—he understood that, and he understood what was happening to me. I didn't feel any sort of connection or anything to him because of that, I just appreciated it. He was simply nodding at this point and taking things in and then he pointed to my stomach and I raised my eyebrows. What in the world?

"So how do you feel knowing you can conceive again?" Lance asked me.

I took a deep breath. "Wait…come again, what?"

"You and Dean were going to have a baby and then you lost it because Chelsea shot you and you then couldn't conceive…you don't remember that, do you?" He asked me as I looked at him hurt and blank.

"Oh my God," I said softly. "I thought Jen was just using that as an example when she brought me back, to let me know how new my body really was."

Lance just nodded and let me go to my car, and I drove to the cemetery—after getting instructions from Lance—and I wandered. I found the headstones that I was looking for and I started to cry because I couldn't believe that it had taken _so _much to remember. Casey had been my baby…mine and Dean's _baby _and I just—I couldn't believe everything that was happening to me.

"I can't believe I forgot," I said aloud, wiping away some tears. "Sweetheart, I promise you that I will _never_ forget you again…you're my baby."

Memories of the pregnancies came back, and though fragmented, I started to cry even more as I stared at the headstone and ran my fingers along my stomach. I got down on my knees, talking to the graves for a bit, before I realized that I needed to know more and I had to get back home. I wanted my memories back and now regardless of the consequences, so I got back into the car and drove home, stopping and parking across the street, getting out and hiding behind a tree. In the driveway…was the Impala.

**Note: Oh snap, it's a cliffy and a not so long chapter—only 16 pages. Still, the next chapter is very important and I think all of you will really love it. Feedback is always appreciated!**


	26. All I Want is You

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay, so this chapter is…I wanna say emotional charged, haha. I wouldn't call it sad, or angry, or angsty, or fluffy…it's kind of everything all wrapped into one, so I hope you like it and POV shifts…**

**Also I always feel like even though it's in my warnings, I have to warn you for smut so…be warned for that.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Florence's POV**

I looked up when I saw Sam and Dean storming into the house and I smiled a little because I had expected this. The three of us had only met briefly, and Dean was at home enough to just come right on in and he was upset. That, and I knew that Kate had tipped them off and I was glad about it: she needed them in her life and on her side.

Lana also simply needed Dean.

"All right, what's going on?" He asked angrily.

"What do you mean?" Annie asked, smiling sheepishly.

Sam gave Annie a look. "Kate tipped us off and we read the Fed Database. Checking up and everything, and there was an article…about Lana."

"Oh," Kate told them nodding, "that."

"What do you mean, 'Oh, that'?" Dean practically screamed. "She's alive!"

I could tell that Dean was really at a loss of what to say and what to do, but I wasn't sure what _I_ was supposed to do. My daughter felt like she was betraying them by not remembering what she thought she needed to remember, but I thought they could help her. The spell book would be here that night or the next morning and by the next evening we could do the ritual and until then, she was going to need to look to Sam and Dean…they were after all the ones that had been with her these last two years.

"Dean…keep your voice down, please," I told him, taking a breath. "Lana's been through a lot, and if you're going to see her—"

"—I HAVE TO TALK TO HER!" Dean yelled, cutting me off.

Everyone in the room froze when Lana walked in, except for Sam and Dean since she was standing behind them. Seeing their car out front she had probably decided to just come on in and talk to them and I was glad. This was something that wasn't easy for her, but she must have been aware that it wasn't easy for Sam and Dean either…she'd worked her way into their family, and she needed to be with them—be _honest_ with them.

xx

**Lana's POV**

When I had seen the Impala in the driveway, the first thing I had thought about was just waiting until they left, but I knew in my heart that was the _wrong_ decision. I wanted to be a better person than the one I kind of remembered being and that meant facing Sam and Dean. Besides, they were probably only there because they'd found out I was alive from someone other than me and that in itself was probably hurting Dean and I didn't want to hurt him anymore…I didn't want to hurt him ever again.

"I love you, Dean…" I told him, standing in the room feeling his emotions all surge out of him.

There was a long, pregnant pause and you could cut the tension with a knife, but Dean turned around and looked at me. Pain was in his eyes and etched across his face and I just wanted to run up to him and pull him close to me, but there was anger he had to let out. He had just found out that I was still alive and it hadn't been from me so he must have been doubly upset and I couldn't very well blame him.

"HOW _DARE _YOU NOT CALL ME THE SECOND YOU WERE BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE?!" He asked me loudly, but he was losing this battle with himself. "HOW CAN I EVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS?!"

"Yeah," I said nodding, "That's the perfect response to, 'I love you'."

Everyone was silent until Annie started to laugh a little and Dean shot her a look which made her hold her hands up in surrender. She tried to hold the laugh in and I put my hands in my back pockets and Dean ran his hand down his face, looking at me. I knew that I loved him—that much I knew from my scattered memories and the engagement ring but…where were my specifics? How could I just blurt that out to him? I just…I wanted him to know I did, because I did…

"I don't remember any specifics and I felt bad about that," I told them since no one was talking yet…just staring at each other. "I mean things have been coming back to me, but I just…I feel like it's not fair to you guys that I don't remember. I just _want to remember_."

Dean nodded and walked over to me, slowly reaching out to cup my face like he was making sure that I was real. He stroked my cheek and smiled sadly, closing his eyes and putting his forehead to mine as everyone else in the room held their ground. I closed my eyes too and focused on Dean, feeling like this touch was familiar and my God did he smell better than the scent he left on my bed! Having him solid and right here where I could touch him was better than anything else in the world and if I could just keep him here with me forever, I would.

"I would have done the same thing," Dean told me, taking a deep breath. "I would have let you move on without me and have a better life and move on, but damn-it, Lanni…"

I stepped closer to him and looked up, our eyes meeting. "Just please help me to remember, Dean."

"I feel like my insides are on fire," Dean said with a smile on his face. "I think I might vomit…"

"Dean Winchester is feeling too many feelings at once!" I laughed and smiled when he did. "That felt like the right thing to say."

Dean nodded and pulled me closer, glancing at my lips. "It definitely was."

"So…are you two going to kiss or what?" Kate asked us, nodding and making a face at us. "Because I'm _dying_ over here waiting to see what the Hell is going to happen between the two most _stubborn_ people on the whole planet!"

"You wanna take this upstairs?" Dean asked me softly.

I just nodded and after reaching out to squeeze Sam's hand and tell him I was happy to see him, I took Dean's hand and took him upstairs. We went into my room and shut the door behind us, both of us standing there a moment, unsure of what to do. It wasn't like some movie where the guy swoops in and kisses the girl and the screen fades to black…this was real life…we had things to talk about no matter what feelings we were trying to control.

"You know the best part of sleeping in my bed was that it smelled like you," I told Dean in the silence as he stared at me. "Still trying to figure out if I'm real or not?"

Dean smiled a little. "I'm trying to figure out whether or not I'm dreaming."

"You're not dreaming…my family resurrected me," I said with a shrug. "You gave me the ring…"

"Oh…yeah…it's yours." Dean told me, stepping closer to me. "What is it going to take for you to remember, Lanni?"

Dean reached out and took the ring on the chain around my neck into his hand, playing with it as it hung around my neck and he looked in my eyes. This man was showing me so many emotions just by looking into my eyes with his and I suddenly felt like I couldn't feel my knees anymore. What was I doing just standing here? Kate had said that memories would come back to me if I saw, smelt, heard or felt anything substantial then it would all come back…so I kissed him.

At first I didn't think Dean was going to respond, but he did, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me close, deepening the kiss and worming his fingers into my hair. I held him tightly and then resituated my hands, going up to cup his face and pull him closer to me even though he was really about as close as he could get. He pulled back as some memories started to come back to me and I made a noise of protest as Dean smiled a little and stroked my cheek.

"Well good news is…you remember how to kiss," Dean told me.

I grinned at him. "Really?"

"What else do you remember?" Dean asked me.

"I remember that being in your arms is the safest feeling I have ever had." I whispered and then I pulled out of his embrace and he made a face. "Oh my God, we can't do this! I can't do this to you!"

Dean raised his eyebrows at me and I knew I was acting crazy so I took a deep breath and I touched my lips for a moment. I let Dean take a few steps to me and stroke my hair and I looked up into his eyes sadly. What in the world was wrong with me? Why was I pushing this beautiful man away? I had my reasons…but none of them seemed important anymore the more I looked into his amazing hazel eyes.

"Can't do what?" Dean asked me.

"I'm not the same," I told him lamely.

Dean nodded at me. "That was apparent when you never called."

"No, no. I mean this body of mine—it's new." I explained to him. "When Jen, Annie and Kate brought me back, they explained to me that because it was borderline dark magic I have to embrace my powers and not let them consume me."

"Okay and…?" Dean asked me.

"Dean do you even know what that means?! _I _don't even know what that means!" I told him and closed my eyes.

Dean took a deep breath and kissed me, running his hands up and down my arms and then kissing me again. He really just wanted me, and I was thankful for that and so I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. I pulled back though and looked up into his eyes, biting my lip and Dean nodding because he knew I had something else to say to him. It was so perfect that he knew me so well and I just wanted to melt right into him and forget about everything else and just start over…but how could I?

"Stop thinking that kissing me is going to make everything better," I told him.

He smirked at me. "You seem to like it enough, Lanni. When we find out what it means for you to practice your powers, we'll deal with it. Right now, you're sill Lanni…you're still _my_ Lanni. Can you deal with that? Can you just let go and be with me?"

I smiled at him and kissed him in reply, letting him move us over to the bed so we could lie on it. Dean wrapped his arms around me and let me run my hands along him, but nothing went past there. He was just going to hold me close, and I was going to let him.

"With more persuasion, I might be willing to forgive you," he said, a smile on his face.

I kissed him again and looked him in the eye. "I'll remember that."

xx

**Dean's POV**

I woke up to Lana running around in her pajamas and to be honest it was the most adorable thing I had ever seen. She was looking for something, and I smiled a little, leaning against the headrest on her bed, and she gave me a look when I laughed. She was just too cute and I really wanted her to know that I thought that.

"What?" I asked her.

"I really need to get going," she told me. "I don't want to be late."

I raised my eyebrows. "For what?"

"School," she replied quickly.

I sat up more. "What?"

"I—I went back to school," she explained to me. "I'm taking two classes, and today is my second one."

"Why are you in school?" I asked her.

It didn't make any sense. I was here to fix things…_to be with her_. I was here to put things back to the way they used to be, and she was taking classes? What about hunting? What about finding the demon? For some reason I had just been under the impression that she was back and that meant that things would go back to normal…couldn't they just go back to how they were when it was me, Sam, Kate and Lana and things were good?

"I wanted to go back," she told me softly. "Are you mad about it?"

She started to change, stripping down to her underwear and then going over to her closet, trying to figure out what to wear. It was kind of cute that she wore underwear when she slept with other people—she'd told me it was because she was used to sleepovers and hated it when her boobs flopped everywhere when they did things. I had to answer her question…but how?

"No, I'm not," I told her and then I frowned. "Why are you wearing that?"

I didn't like that she was picking really cute clothes to wear. What were there cute professors or boys or something? Why did she feel the need to look cute? She wasn't staying back with me, so what was she doing? Was I suddenly in over protective boyfriend mode with her? Already?

"Um…maybe because it's cute, Dean," she replied, giving me a look and pulling the top on, and grabbing her tight jeans.

"Fine," I told her, lying back down. "You need a ride?"

"No," she said, quickly.

I raised an eyebrow, thoroughly not enjoying that she had said that so quickly. "Fine…"

I knew that I had sounded really bitter, but I felt as if she didn't want me to take her to her stupid class. I mean I knew she hadn't _meant_ it that way, but at the same time she'd answered so quickly and that had to mean something, didn't it? What was it about this school that made her not want me there?

"Baby, I said I don't _need _one, not that I don't _want _one." She told me, crawling onto the bed after pulling on some socks. "Hey…look at me, please? I know that you're cranky now, but I can make it better…"

She kissed me then, nipping at my bottom lip and it made me involuntarily moan, but I had missed her and I just wanted her. Still, I was stubborn and I let her nip a little harder before I captured her lips with mine and ran my nose along hers. Smiling, Lana pulled back and sat firmly on my lap, letting me sit up and circle my arms around her, just so beyond thrilled that she was alive and here regardless of how it happened.

Once I had believed that what was dead should stay dead and part of me _still _believed it, but honestly I couldn't live without Lana. She had made her way all the way into my heart and I had seen what life was like without her and I was _never _going to lose her again. There was just so much right now that neither of us understood and we would deal with all of it later because right now, this was us. Her and me.

"I want us to grab some coffee," she said pecking my lips, cupping my face, "and then you can drive me to school," a nip was place on my jaw, "and then when class is done you can get me and I'll get my memories back."

I smiled at that. "I'm glad your mother can do that…do you know how she does?"

"She's a witch and I'm sure there are other things about her that I don't know at all," Lana explained shrugging. "Just like you keep learning things about _your_ father. I am still all in here, by the way, Dean. You and me, in it until the end, no secrets…"

"Good, because I'm never going anywhere, ever again," I told her honestly. "Plus, at some point, I am going to propose good and proper."

"Way to ruin the surprise!" Lana teased, but her face was flushed, which meant that I had just done something good. "Now, I would solicit morning sex, but I don't want to lose my second virginity right before class when I'm already going to be late, so…"

With that she hustled me up and we grabbed some coffee, the others sincerely happy that she and I were so happy. It helped that we had both talked a lot the night before and then fallen asleep in each other's arms and woken up to find out that it hadn't all been some fantastic dream that would have in turn been a gigantic nightmare. I had been busy telling her about how we'd gone to Hollywood and I hadn't gotten lucky like I was going to because towards the end we'd found out she was alive and just finished up the hunt to come back to her, and she had told me a lot about the ritual that had brought her back.

We were still trying to be overly honest and I thought it was pretty healthy.

"Any sex?" Kate asked as she sipped her own coffee, Sam elbowing her in the ribs. "What? Those two go at it when we're sleeping, Sammy—you know that right?"

Sam looked offended and looked at Lana, who was blushing. "YOU WHAT?!"

"Sometimes we were very quiet about it—you never noticed," I said with a shrug, kissing the top of Lana's head.

"We are dirty, dirty people," Lana muttered into her thermos. "No, not yet—we're just enjoying each other right now and I have class."

"What is wrong with you two?!" Sam asked, but he starting laughing when I grinned smugly and started wiggling my eyebrows. "He has been an incredibly bad influence on you, Lan."

She and I smiled and then we headed out to the car, me thinking about that because it was kind of true: I had gotten Lana to start doing a whole Hell of a lot. Once she had been this sexy, vivacious, innocent virgin and now she was mine and with that had come her desperate to learn how to keep me and make me sexually happy and what she didn't seem to get was that all I needed was _her_. _She _made me happy and turned me on and even though I enjoyed teaching her things—I thoroughly did, and she enjoyed learning—sometimes I honestly loved that she was so inexperienced because it was adorable. Her blushing and babbling got me every time.

When I parked and got out, Lana and I looked around, and then I noticed that there was yellow caution tape. When we got closer, I saw that there was a chalk outline drawn, and lots of blood. Lana immediately headed for a blonde girl I'd never seen before who was crying, and I walked around a little bit. I was genuinely curious and didn't want Lana to be in a situation where she could get hurt and this was going to get fixed, one way or another.

"I think that it's only fair to say that today, all classes are cancelled," a man said.

As I looked around more, I wondered if this was maybe our thing and even though Lana seemed more focused on helping this new friend of hers, I went into 'hunter' mode. It was easy for me—like a switch that just flipped itself—and I pulled out my phone to call Sam and have him come down here too, to take a look. Lana and I could easily do this together, but Sam also caught onto things pretty quick and maybe we could use some of his random knowledge stored away in that noggin of his.

"Well, Mr. Lurk, why don't you just put that phone away, and let someone else handle this?" Lana asked me.

I turned to see her and the blonde standing there. "What?"

"Stop," she told me. "I don't want you snooping around here."

"Why?" I asked her, a little bit annoyed I'll admit.

She took a deep breath. "Because I'm asking you kindly not to."

"This the boyfriend?" The blonde asked.

Lana nodded at her. "Yeah, um…Paige, this is Dean. Dean, Paige."

We shook hands, but I couldn't help but be annoyed that she introduced me to Paige first. Why did I feel like I came second? Hunting, my passion, came second to school, her new passion. I, her boyfriend, came second to Paige, her new friend. In fact, Sam read she was alive before me…she had to have planned that too, somehow.

"Stop looking at her like that, Dean. You know what I'll see you at home, all right? Just go and don't look into this," she told me, and walked off with Paige.

"Fine!" I called after her, and kicked the tree, wincing a little, and hobbling off to get back into the car.

xx

Back at the house, I was researching on Lana's laptop without permission, and she came storming into the room. It had only been a few hours since I'd seen her at the school, and she shut the laptop and set it on her desk on the other side of the room. Honestly I didn't understand why she was so angry because if this was a hunt, then this was what I needed to do and she _knew_ that.

"I thought I told you to stay out of it!" She yelled.

I rolled my eyes. "Lana, this looks like our kind of gig."

"And I want some other hunter to deal with it without us getting involved! I already had Kate call Lance! They're handling it!" She cried, and she looked like she was going to cry. "Why don't you ever do what I tell you to do?"

"Maybe, Lana, I don't feel like I'm obligated to because you don't seem to care about what I want anymore! You've only been thinking about yourself since you were brought back!" I told her in a loud, angry voice.

She looked at me, a little hurt, and then she let me have it. "Well excuse me for being brought back! Do you think I asked for this?! I let go! I moved on! I said my goodbyes, I embraced the end, and then I wake up, in a coffin, with stale air, and my best friend, my favorite cousin, and my only sister greet me! They brought me back to activate the Rune because it holds all of the answers and they can't do it without me! They tell me that I have to embrace the demon in me, and you want me to what? Jump up and down for joy that I'm alive and call you? Maybe celebrate it with some sex and a beer or something?! Forgive me for trying to put my life back together because I woke up with very little memory of anything that happened! I'm sorry that you feel left behind, pushed aside, or neglected, but I still don't know who I am yet! Then a demon problem shows up! You think I want to deal with _demons_ right now?! Do you think that while I'm trying to figure out who I am, I want to deal with demons, when I don't even know what all of this means? Do you know how hard this is for me? No, wait. Never mind. Why would you care? I'm just being selfish."

I didn't know how to react to what she'd just said, and she nodded in the pause and wiped a tear away before leaving the room, slamming the door shut behind her. It was the slamming of the door that made me realize that I wanted to go after her. I wanted to tell her that I was sorry, and I hadn't realized how much she was really holding in here. Of _course_ she didn't want to deal with demons. She was trying to adjust to being in the world again, and I was being an idiot. All I was doing was pushing her away, and for all I knew, when she got back, she was going to ask me to leave.

"Dean?" Kate asked me.

I looked up. "Yeah?"

"Um…Lana's eyes just flashed and then she passed out." Kate said quickly and I hurried past Kate, down the stairs and into the living room, not seeing anything.

"Where is she?" I asked hurriedly, worried.

Kate came down. "You didn't let me finish! Then she got up and said that she felt fine, and she needed to take a walk. We have no idea what this means."

"Where are Annie, Florence, Sam and Lance?" I asked.

"Lance is on his way here, and Annie and Sam are with Aunt Flor at a movie." Kate explained to me. "I just—I heard you guys yelling…she'll come back."

"I know going after her is probably the worst thing…but where is she?" I asked her.

Kate smiled at me. "She's in the park, probably on the swing set."

That answer was pretty much obvious and so I nodded, and went to the park, looking at the swing set, and looking at her swing slowly. When I got closer, I heard her crying and I sat on the swing next to her. I couldn't believe that I had set her off like this…it wasn't fair and I knew it.

"I'm sorry, Lanni," I told her.

She stopped the swing and looked at me. "Why'd you follow me?"

The question wasn't mean or angry—she just genuinely wanted to know. She hadn't thought I would follow, but I'd follow her anywhere and I really wished that these things were easier. She'd left us and she'd died and she had left all of her baggage behind and now she had new baggage and she needed me on her side to help her deal with it…and I needed her too.

"Because I needed to tell you how sorry I was," I told her honestly.

She nodded. "Well, go and wait at home for me, and let me cool down, all right?"

It was soft and gentle, and I nodded at her because I honestly didn't want her to realize that she wanted this life without me in it. I walked back to the house and I lay down on her bed, trying hard not to be really sad about this because I hated acting like such a girl. I was afraid with this space she'd realize she didn't need me anymore. I mean I was part of the old Lana's life. The new Lana could live without me…she could go to school and make new friends and be happy and not fight demons. Shouldn't that be what I wanted for her in the first place? An actual life?

"What do you want?" Lana asked me.

I looked up because she had caught me off guard—I hadn't realized she had come back yet but here she was right in front of me. I had had a good hour to think things over, and now she asks me what I want? That question had a _very_ easy answer.

"I want you," I replied and she nodded, standing by the door.

"I'm sorry I yelled," she said as I stood up and stepped closer to her. "I didn't know how else to get everything out. I've been selfish, you're right, and when Mom gives me back my memories I will know who I am. I think part of this is worried about my demon half and knowing that you didn't take it well finding out I was half demon in the first place so having to use powers? Yeah…wanting to do all this has been a bit selfish on my part and I'm so sorry, Dean."

"Lana…you have every right to be selfish." I told her. "You were right—you didn't ask for this life again, and this way, but you have it and in having it you should do what you want to do with it. You should be with the people you want to be with. I shouldn't be forcing myself on you. I should let you find yourself. Give me another chance when _you're_ ready to give me another chance."

She nodded, and then stopped me as I tried to get past her to the door. "You never asked what _I_ wanted."

"What do you want?" I asked, humoring her.

"You," she whispered softly, "and all of your beautiful, flawless imperfection. I want your temper, and your passion, and your patience. I want every fiber in your being—every piece of your soul."

"Woman…" I said softly, and knew that I was starting to go soft.

"Take off your shirt," she told me suddenly.

I looked at her. "Wait…what?"

"Take off your shirt," she repeated gently.

xx

**Lana's POV**

Dean didn't know what I was doing…Hell, _I_ didn't even know what I was doing. All I knew was that at this moment, I wanted to be one with him. I wanted to let go of everything bad and negative that had ever happened between us, and I wanted to feel that connection I once had with him. Someday this would be easier, and I would really _love_ to have everything for us start again right here and right now.

"Do you remember when we first had sex?" I asked him as he took off his shirt.

"Yes," he said with a nod. "I remember it better than you do…sorry."

I shook my head. "Nah, that's all right. I remember even less now, I'm sure, but soon I'll remember all of it and we'll be back. I promise you that, Dean. Look, I love you. I love everything about you. Your pigishness. Your vulgarness. Your softness. Your voice. The sound of your heart beating. I just…I love you, Dean. I remember that firmly and I think that our love is something even my being dead couldn't erase. This happens to be a special room…I know that much."

"Except for a few rearranged things, yes, it's exactly the way it was the first time we did anything physical." He told me, stroking my hair. "Even when you're sappy, I am extremely attracted to you…"

I smiled and nodded at that, kissing him, happy to have his lips on mine and want this as bad as I did. I mean honestly I'd been alive for like three days, but this was me and Dean…this was how we had started once before, and this was how we were going to start again, only better. The thing was that for some reason even knowing that, I was feeling nervous…_really_ nervous.

"Okay, so…" I whispered, kissing him softly and running my fingers along his bare chest after locking the door. "Make love to me, Dean Winchester. Did that sound cliché and weird?"

Dean chuckled and kissed me, and I smiled a little into it as I took off my shirt, breaking the kiss only to get the shirt off. He had no problems unclasping the bra or dropping his pants and mine, but when he laid me down on the bed and looked at me with all that love and care in his eyes, I got nervous again. What was with that? I'd had sex before. I mean yeah this was _physically_ new because I was like a virgin again but uh…it wasn't like I didn't know what to do.

"Okay, I know that I have memories of this, but…I don't think I'm totally ready for this." I told him. "This is going to hurt…"

Dean stroked my cheek and smiled. "We don't have to do this if you don't want to."

"Please," I told him giving him a look. "I asked for it, I can't back out."

"Yes you can," he replied softly. "I don't want you to do anything you're not ready for. We will move as slow or as fast as you want and we will make it through. There is nothing that the world can throw at us that we will not overcome because we are stronger together—we don't need sex to prove that when we're already proving it."

I smiled at him and kissed him again because honestly _why_ was I nervous when he was this perfect? Dean loved me and I loved him, and honestly, I trusted him more than he'd ever be able to know and that was the end of it. He ran his fingers through my hair as he kissed me softly, the fingers of his other hand moving in circles along my bare skin, leaving a trail of disappearing goose bumps on their wake.

"Hey…I love you," Dean told me suddenly, our eyes meeting as he slipped his hand between my legs. "I haven't said it yet and I needed to."

My eyes lulled a little. "Oh, okay…fingers…"

"You mean you're not gonna say it back?" Dean asked me and I opened my eyes to catch the look on his face as his fingers dipped and stroked. "I mean I just told you that I _loved_ you…"

"Wait, wait," I told him and closed my eyes and moaned softly when he didn't because he was Dean, "we haven't discussed…I can…Dean…conceive…are you listening?"

Dean kissed me and whispered against my lips, "I kind of got that when you said that you were all shiny and new and I'm okay with it."

I opened my mouth to protest, but Dean covered my mouth with his and I tried to focus but I couldn't. Was he saying he knew and that meant he was taking the risk of potentially knocking me up? Every time I tried to ask him about it or think I just felt those fingers and soon I was making a small cry as my release hit and Dean showered my face in kisses softly.

"That's my girl," Dean whispered, kissing me softly. "God, I've missed that sound…"

I laughed and kissed him back. "I love you too."

"Oh so _now_ you can focus?" Dean asked me.

"Oh very funny," I replied, running my hand down his torso to touch him. "Now…can you manage to say it again while I'm doing things to _you_?"

Dean closed his eyes and moved against my hand a little and I just did what he wanted until we were ready. We made eye contact and he kissed me, running his lips down to my ear, biting down and pushing inside of me at the same time. I gave a slight cry and dug my nails into his back and his shoulder and Dean pulled back a little and looked me in the eye, stroking my cheek.

"You okay?" he whispered to me.

I smiled and stroked his hair. "I'm fine…really."

I kissed him, and as he deepened the kiss, several thoughts ran through my mind. His skin felt like velvet as it brushed against mine, and the warmth between us grew. He was so gentle and soft…so loving and kind, just like I had always pictured actually losing my virginity. Two people in love, pushing each other to our breaking points and I was a goner as I felt him pushing in and slipping out, filling and stretching me. He didn't treat me like I was glass, and yet he treated me like I would break, and I was okay with that right then actually because this was an intimate moment that should be like that.

We turned over, and the slow, loving nature started to change as our bodies moved together, me on top. I remembered how much I liked this position and though it was still loving, and still kind, things seemed to move faster now and I could control more just how deep he could go. It was like no one else existed honestly and it was perfect. It was like time was ours and we were manipulating it to our advantage—we were the only two people that mattered anymore, and it just…it felt _right_.

Still, Dean went over the edge before I do, spilling himself inside of me, something we were used to. I had had a hard time conceiving and so we hadn't really done the protection thing and now we were used to not using any and maybe we should have been…if I had a baby now, we weren't ready for it. Still, he managed to push me over the edge even with the slightly dull pain of a broken hymen and then held me tightly in his arms, both of us on our sides, and I smiled at him.

"We've still got it," I told him.

He nodded and kissed me gently. "Absolutely…and just how I always wished I'd taken your virginity in the first place."

"And here 5% of me always wanted to be taken nice and hard—broken in, in like one fell swoop," I teased, Dean grunting pleasantly.

"Son of a bitch, you _are_ the perfect woman," he said kissing me again.

We both laughed a little bit as we held each other close, nipping at each other's lips and keeping the kisses deep and slow. The two of use could devour each other, we were sure, and part of us didn't want to ever rejoin the real world, but this was like a new beginning and I was enjoying it. Besides, soon I would have my memories back and maybe then Dean and I could have an even better start…I hoped so, and I was looking forward to it.

"You sure you wanted to do that all unprotected?" I asked him softly, thinking about it a little. "I mean this body has been in commission like what? A couple of days?"

"That was _exactly _how I wanted this all to go," Dean replied to me and I nodded and kissed his chest softly, making him chuckle softly. "I'm not a machine, Meckenzie."

I giggled and kissed him more, him chuckling some more as I moved my hair out of my face and ran my lips along his pecks. For a moment I even started to trace the contours of his muscles with my tongue, nipping at bit at his flesh with my teeth playfully because I was by no means done with him. He stroked my hair and then I looked him in the eye and kissed him a little more.

"Sure you are, Winchester," I smirked at him, glad he was stroking my hair.

He chuckled again. "Give me five minutes to recover."

"Five?" I asked the kissing and nipping starting to slowly go lower.

"Lanni…" he said, his breath catching in his throat and I looked up at him and nibbled his bottom lip.

"Five minutes and counting," I whispered, and I kissed him again.

**Note: There we go! They're way too cute, aren't they? One more shortish chapter and then another episodic one coming to you soon! Plus, I foreshadowed the angels on purpose last episode just like Michael was foreshadowed in S5 and they have a great storyline with Lana coming up later on. Also, remember that it's almost time for 'Season Three', so expect some SERIOUS angst soon! Feedback is always appreciated!**


	27. Shoe on the Other Foot

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Okay, you get to know who Lana's _biological_ father is this chapter! Whoo! You also get to see Sam and Kate's relationship grow a bit and I really love writing Kate and Sam, okay? I absolutely adore them.**

**Also, here's another smut warning even though it's not heavy smut or anything, just some pretty hot and heavy parts that aren't overly descriptive.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

**Lana's POV**

I woke up the next morning to my cell phone, and I was kind of annoyed, but at the same time I had to answer it. I wanted to just snuggle into Dean and stay there the whole day, but I _did _have things to look into today and if I didn't answer my phone now, it would wake my adorable Dean up…so I answered it.

I flipped my phone open. "Hello?"

"Hey, Lana, it's Paige." Paige told me.

I smiled at her voice. "Hey Paige, what's up?"

"The cops hit a dead end and Dean Jackson thought we should have class today…so Psychology is still going as planned." Paige explained to me.

"Okay, I'll meet you in front of the school, Paige." I told her.

"Can we meet early?" Paige asked me. "I mean, I know we haven't known each other that long, but I have something I want to tell you."

I smiled a little more. "All right, Paige, and don't worry about it—we're fast friends."

"Thanks. See you soon, Lana." Paige said.

I nodded. "All right, I'll see you in about twenty minutes."

I hung up, and then I smiled, running my fingers through my hair and getting up after kissing Dean's lips softly and quickly. I showered and then wrapped a towel around myself when I got out, walking into my room and laughing when Dean gave me a look. He was _far_ too adorable for his own good and I think he _knew_ that.

"Yeah, so I forgive you and you wake up and shower without me?" He asked me.

I smirked at that. "Well, after forgiving me so many times, I figured a little time apart would make the heart grow fonder."

"How many times did I forgive you last night?" Dean asked me.

"Um…four…" I told him as I opened up my closet—this playfulness, I could _totally_ get used to.

"So who owes me?" He asked me.

I turned to him. "I'm thinking the hot pants and the sexy red top."

Dean gave me a look. "What?"

It was almost like Dean was suddenly jealous and he really had _no_ reason to be—I was _never_ leaving this man again. He was mine, and I was his, and there was absolutely _no_ way that I was letting _anything_ change that. Besides, I still wore the engagement ring around my neck on a chain, so he had to know I was in love with him by this point.

"There's this really hot guy name Ryan, and I was hoping that today would be the day he noticed me." I told him and laughed as his face changed.

"Excuse me?" Dean asked me.

I smiled at him and put my hands on my hips. "Dean, how many times did I show you how much I loved you last night?"

"Four," he said with a smirk.

"Exactly," I told him. "I would _love_ to show you more, but I have to get to class—the school's open today."

The minute the words came out of my mouth, Dean made a face and I knew I should tell him that I was thinking of quitting school again. I mean I didn't think I was _ready _for demon hunting again but who really was? Hunting demons was what Dean wanted to do, and I was going anywhere that he was going. Still, as I started to get dressed Dean sighed and lay back on the bed and it was breaking my heart.

"Right…school." Dean said and he was upset as I pulled my shirt on and then my pants and looked at him.

"Get dressed and drive me to school," I told him happily. "I'll be downstairs getting that wonderful smelling coffee and by later today I'll probably drop out again. I mean I _am_ getting my memories back, you know?"

He smiled a little because I wanted him to be part of my entire day, and so I went down the stairs and got some hot coffee. When I heard Dean on the stairs I looked up and smiled at him in his t-shirt and jeans and drank some coffee. He smirked at me and shook his head and I gave him a look. What now?

"What?" I asked him.

He shook his head. "Even given another chance in life, you haven't learned to eat before you consume coffee."

"That's what you're worrying about?" I asked him with a laugh. "Trust me—even with my coffee consumption I'm sure my body will do things just fine."

"Where is everyone?" He asked me after glancing at my stomach.

I smiled because I was glad that he was so very on board with having a baby now that I could but was I ready for that? I mean I was demonic so…that meant that our baby would have demon blood in him or her too…were we _ready_ for that? Well I mean…as ready as you ever _could_ be for parenthood and hunting of course.

I handed Dean the note that had been left, and he looked it over as I went over to the muffins in the basket on the counter. My mother didn't like to bake but Kate apparently did and I was thankful to have some _real_ food around since I'd miss it when it was gone. The note that had been left read:

_**Lana and Dean,**_

_**I'm off to pick up Lance with Sam so we can solve**_

_**this demon problem and Aunt Flor left to do**_

_**some grocery shopping. Annie is visiting**_

_**Penn because all of this has her missing him.**_

_**We'll be back soon.**_

_**Hope you guys are patched up cause it**_

_**certainly sounded like you are!**_

_**Kate**_

Smirking a bit at how we had _totally_ reconciled, I bit into the muffin. "I feel playful right now for some reason."

Dean chuckled at that and looked up, beaming when I winked at him and he watched me chew my bite of muffin. He put the note down, and came over to me, resting his hands on my waist and biting into the other side of the muffin as I took another bite, and I giggled a little. I really hoped that Dean and I could stay this way because I was in love with how we were right now.

"It seems that you feel playful too," I told him, loving that he kissed me to shut me up. "But I can't right now."

"Sure you can," Dean replied in a whisper. "Blow off school."

I nodded at him, turning it into a game. "Or what?"

"Or…I'll eat the rest of your muffin." He said.

I smiled at him. "You are so gosh dern cute, but I can't blow off school. One, it would be irresponsible, and two, Paige needs me."

"Right…Paige." Dean told me, and let go of me.

I knew I looked surprised and I shouldn't have been opening my mouth like that _and_ smiling at the same time but I couldn't help it. He was _jealous_ of _Paige_, and he really shouldn't be but I understood _why_ he was at the same time. It was like I was starting all over and while that had been the plan in the first place, I knew that my true place was wherever Dean was and hunting was his life…so it was my life too. Dean needed to know that too.

"Oh my God, you cannot seriously be jealous of Paige," I said, eating the rest of the muffin.

"Why shouldn't I be? You spend more time with her than you do with me." He told me.

I smiled at him. "Maybe lately, but I love you more. I proved that several times last night. I think I love you more than anyone."

"You're only saying that to make me feel better," Dean replied with a sigh.

"When did you get all EMO? Don't make Sam and I call Ellen and ask for help with you." I joked, and sat on his lap as he sat on the couch.

Dean chuckled as I grinned, and pinned me to the couch in one fast motion, making me laugh. He kissed me and I kissed him back, running my fingers through his hair and smiling when his lips slid down to my neck.

"All this me being alive stuff, has you super happy," I told him softly.

Dean gave me a look. "Well I do in fact love you, you silly girl."

I smiled and kissed him gently. "I love you too, you silly boy…enough to get up and go and see Paige."

Dean sighed and nodded, getting off of me, and I went into the bathroom, turning on the water and grabbing a glass. I filled it up and then took a bottle of pills out of the closet while Dean leaned on the doorframe and looked at me.

"What are those?" He asked me.

I shrugged. "Ibuprofen—I'm a little sore."

He chuckled at that and I smiled at him, popping the Ibuprofen down and then setting the glass down when Dean came over to me. I kissed him softly, nibbling on his bottom lip a little, and it took a _lot_ of willpower not to ask him to go back up to bed and even just hold me for a while. Sleeping together had brought back more memories for me and I just…I wanted to be with my man.

"I hate it when you make me surrender all possible manhood I have, Lanni. Now you have to stay home." Dean told me.

I smiled and nodded. "God, I want to but I'll see you later, okay? Drive me?"

Dean shook his head but smiled. "You can keep me away for a little while longer. Just mention to Ryan that your boyfriend is going to kill him…fiancé if you'd put that ring on your finger where it belongs."

"I love you," I told him, reaching to unclasp the necklace but letting him do it and then slide the ring onto my finger. "I can't marry you though, unless you _ask_ me."

"In a better setting—someplace without a shower but, uh…wear it? For safe keeping?" Dean asked me.

I smiled and kissed him. "God I love you all trying to be romantic."

He rolled his eyes and kissed me again, and then I grabbed my jacket, put on some shoes, and left the house. I hurried to the school and smiled at Paige who immediately began to explain to me that she wasn't who she said she was. She wanted me to be her actual friend and that meant knowing that she was a hunter—well I was too. Unfortunately, in the middle of telling her I didn't mind, I felt my eyes flash and everything went black.

xx

**Dean's POV**

When Lana left, I went out and sat on the couch, turning on the TV and taking a deep breath—I should have driven her to school. I didn't like being on my own and she had offered this time, but I had wanted her to get to do her own thing. Still, what about hunting? I didn't understand what was going to happen when we started hunting again…would she be coming with us?

"Anybody home?" Kate called from the front door.

I looked over as she came into the living room. "Hey, Kate."

"Well there's the man of the hour—you and Lana shouldn't go at it like rabbits in her room because…we can hear you." Kate told me.

"That means you and Lan-Bon are all made up then?" Lance asked me, coming into the room.

Kate sighed loudly. "Okay, you _can't _call her by the nickname in front of her boyfriend."

"Fiancé," I corrected her, marking my territory.

I knew I hadn't asked Lana like she wanted yet, but at the same time she'd asked me first hadn't she? Mostly I just felt like it was best that Lance knew that Lana was mine and that I didn't want him anywhere near her. At the same time for some reason I trusted her…maybe it was because she'd didn't have all of her memories…maybe it was the need to be with her after having to be without her for a month…I wasn't sure.

"Congratulations," Lance told me and I actually thought he meant it. "So do we tell him now or later, Kate?"

Kate took a deep breath. "Now, I guess because when Sam gets in he'll tell him anyway."

"You don't want to wait until the big, attractive—" Lance coughed when Kate smacked him in the stomach. "—I say we wait for Sam."

"…what's going on?" I asked them, ignoring whatever Kate and Lance had been talking about before. "What does this have to do with?"

Lance looked at me. "The demon problem…"

"I figured as much, but Lanni told me to stay out of it—that's why _you two_ are covering it." I explained to them.

"That was before Lance thought Lana _was_ the demon problem," Kate said softly.

I wasn't exactly sure how to take that information in because…what the _Hell_ did that even _mean_?! Lana _was_ the demon problem? She couldn't be…she was Lana…_my_ Lana…there was absolutely _no_ way that she was the demon problem when she'd been with me the majority of the time and that wasn't like her. Lana was a _good _person.

"How does that even work?" I asked her.

"Okay…I need to own up here." Kate said slowly.

I nodded quickly. "Yeah, you sure as Hell do."

"Hi!" Sam said quickly, coming into the house. "You told him without me?"

"Sam…I think you need to own up here like Kate was about to do…" I told him, crossing my arms over my chest.

Kate rubbed her temples. "He doesn't know about this part either…look…I think you all need to just sit down."

"I'm good, but thanks for the offer," I told her, but Sam sat on the couch as I stood there looking at her and Lance.

"Now this is new to me too but uh…when Lana's eyes flashed…they flashed yellow. When I told Aunt Flor, she said that would be normal now that the demon half is I guess…'active'? Lana's exhibiting demon-like behavior…like her father." Kate explained to us.

"And?" I asked testily.

Lance gave me a look. "What yellow-eyed demons do you know of? There's only one."

I sat down on the couch slowly as Sam's eyes widened and I took a deep breath and tried to think about this rationally. So Lana's eyes flashed yellow and now I had to let it all sink in that the demon that killed my mother and my father, was my fiancée's father…wow. How in the world was I going to get through this? I mean Lana _wasn't_ her father by _any_ means but…_the_ demon?

"Are you honestly trying to tell me that _the_ demon is Lanni's father?" I asked Kate.

Kate nodded slowly. "Yeah, that's exactly what we're saying. If you don't believe us then you can ask her mother but…"

"So I guess it's time to figure out how to kill her," Lance said suddenly and Kate hit him again which made him give her a look.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Not so fast. You keep your hands off of my cousin, and I'll keep myself from skinning your hot little behind," a female voice said from the door.

Kate smiled a little. "Everyone…this is my younger sister, Kalli. Not the youngest, just younger. She is also a hunter and since Lana is alive and kicking and we're finding more out about this demon half we've always known about, she wanted to be part of it. Kat has High School, so…you'll meet her eventually because she's absolutely _dying_ to meet Sammy soon."

Kalli smiled and waltzed right into the house which made me nod a little—just more of Lana's family coming out of the woodwork. I understood it since Lana had died, but at the same time I was kind of wondering. How many more of these people related to her were going to come around? It was making me think even more that Lana was going to want to stay here and _not_ go with me…and I didn't think I could handle that if I had to be without her _again_.

"Sorry. I just…I don't want you to kill her. She was already murdered once, let's not get redundant." Kalli explained with a laugh.

I smiled a little. "I agree with Kalli. Let's not just go accusing Lanni of doing things we're not sure she's done."

"We have some pretty solid proof," Lance said and Kate nodded.

"As much as I hate to admit that Lance is right…he is." Kate replied, and pulled out Lana's ID card, showing it to me. "I picked it up and cleaned it off before the cops found it earlier. I don't think she's a killer and I don't want to kill her, but something fishy is going on here…"

"Cleaned it up?" Kalli asked her.

Kate nodded slowly. "There was blood on it."

"Lanni goes to school now. She could have dropped it when she was helping Paige get over the death. You didn't see her do it, therefore she didn't—" I was saying, but Lana came in the door, terrified, and she looked at me, blood on her hands.

"Something's wrong." She told me. "I think I'm…Dean?"

She passed out on the floor and Kalli was the first one to her, waving a fan over her and then I got there. Where she pulled the fan out I didn't know, but something was _definitely_ wrong. Was this a side effect of the ritual to bring her back? Was this the demonic thing? How come every time something was really good between us, something _terrible_ happened? Couldn't we catch a damn break?

"What's going on?" Sam asked aloud, pushing her hair out of her face as I cradled her head on my lap.

"She's being framed and on purpose…but I have the spell book from Bobby," Florence said, coming into the house. "Kate, Kalli: please go and get my things out of the forest. Annie, get your sister a cold washcloth for her head. Dean, pick Lana up and follow me. Sam, listen carefully to everything I'm about to say, got it?"

Everyone nodded and I picked Lana up, everyone bustling around as Sam and I followed Florence down into the basement. It was strange to know that she knew Bobby and yet it made sense—she knew my parents too. In fact it sounded like she knew Bobby better than she was letting on…maybe getting a little something, something from the old man. There was a large cage down in the basement with shackles and everything, and I realized just how thick the door was. If anything big was going to go down, it was best that it happened down here and I just…I wanted Lana to be all right. I hated this…I hated seeing her like this when she had enough to deal with.

"Safe room and for our purposes, a spell room to keep out the screaming…or more keep it in so the whole neighborhood doesn't talk," Florence explained to us as Sam and I looked around. "Until I know where her father is and how he's framing her, she stays here, alright?"

I looked at her hard. "That son of a bitch is near?"

"Yes, I can feel him," Florence admitted nodding.

"What does this mean?" Sam asked her.

Florence sighed loudly. "Judging by the blood on her hands…she thinks she's killed today, but he did it…"

xx

**Lana's POV**

When I woke up, I groaned and then immediately looked at my hands—they were blood-free now but I didn't know what the Hell was going on. I looked around, Dean sitting in a chair outside the cage, and I sighed a little…I knew what I had done. Somehow I had killed someone today, and what if I had been doing _all_ of the killings? It's just…why didn't I _remember_ doing it?

"So…what's going on?" I asked him.

Dean took a deep breath. "I hate asking you this but…do you know who your _real_ father is, Lanni?"

"No…but I have an idea." I told him honestly, hating the look I was now receiving. "See, the way you're looking at me, and the tone in your voice, suggests that Annie's eyes flashing yellow means that _the_ demon is my father."

"So Annie's eyes have done that too?" Dean asked me slowly.

I nodded and stood up. "Yeah…when she killed Chelsea and I told you I was kind of afraid of her. So…Mom confirmed it, I take it?"

"Yeah…yeah she did." Dean said, coming over to me. "Your mother also said that she thinks that he is near and killing people and framing you for it. She is almost ready to give you your memories back and then you have to train with her. It means that you have to embrace that part of you and I just…I mean I guess now we'll know for certain what it means to be half demon, right?"

I could tell that Dean was struggling with this because he had felt like he could just sweep who I was under the rug and now he couldn't—now he _really _couldn't. My biological father was the yellow eyed demon that had killed his and Sam's mother and I just couldn't understand why he was _still here _trying to make sure that I was alright. This was scaring him and it was scaring me, and he shouldn't have had to deal with this.

"Is killing me an option?" I asked him and cowered a little when he shot me a look. "Okay, never mind I take that back."

Dean nodded at that and then he unlocked the cage and I shook my head because I was in here for a reason. Mom was keeping me here so she could give me my memories back and keep me away from my father and it was important that I _not _endanger the people that I loved the most. Dean gave me a look when I took a step back though, and then came over to me and rested his hands on my hips. He opened his mouth to say something but I beat him to it because there were things that I now had to say.

"You don't have to have children with me," I told him, avoiding eye contact. "I mean what if having children with me is like the _worst_ possible decision that you could make?"

Dean shook his head. "It's not."

"No?" I asked him.

"No," he replied putting his fingers under my chin and making me look at him. "I want to marry you still, and I want you to have my children, Lanni…someday. You are _not_ your father and I'd be lying if I said our kids would be anything but damn attractive. Come on…if _we_ raised them, then there would be _no_ way they could be evil. Look at how you turned out—your mother made sure that you were good."

I nodded slowly, smiling, and then looked down at myself. "I need to shower."

"Okay. Oh—Kalli told me to say, 'BAM'." Dean said as I headed up the stairs.

"Kalli's here?" I asked excitedly.

Dean nodded. "Yep…"

Dean was upset. Everything was hitting him all at once. Of course everything was hitting me all at once too, but it was different for him. He was in love with a woman who had died and been brought back. A woman whose father was the demon he was trying to destroy—a woman who was part demon and had powers that neither of us could fathom and he was trying to just accept it because he loved me. This was too much for even _me _to take in, so _why_ did he still want to procreate with me again?

"Lanni!" Kalli cried as we got upstairs.

"Kalli!" I replied, embracing her, the both of us jumping up and down and squealing a little.

"Well you don't seem so evil right now," Lance told me.

I nodded and shrugged. "I guess, but…you guys think I could talk to my mother…alone?"

Everyone nodded, and Dean went up to my room while Sam went up to his with Kate and I smiled after him. Sam and I actually hadn't gotten to talk properly and I hated that—he was my friend and my protector, and I was _so_ glad to see him. I bit my lip at the thought as Kalli and Annie headed out with Lance, and then I looked at my mother. She was finally here and I wanted her to stay and I wanted my memories back and I just…this was all so _heavy _right now.

"Dean's freaked, isn't he?" Mom asked me.

I shrugged and nodded my head. "Yes, but he's going out of his way to pretend like he's not entirely freaked. He's telling me he wants me to bear his children and that he wants to marry me and I just—I want my memories back, Mom."

She motioned for me to come and sit with her, so I sat on the couch with her, and I snuggled into her. I wanted to be her little girl again. I wanted to not know anything about any of this. I wanted things to all just leave me alone. I wanted to be normal. Screw the Rune…I would even love to be dead again just to not have to deal with any of this.

"Why did they bring me back, Mommy?" I asked her.

Mom laughed a little and held me. "This is going to be one of those, 'stop feeling sorry for yourself' speeches so get ready for it. I know you feel awkward. I know that you're feeling rather disconnected, but right upstairs is a man that is in love with you for better of for worse. You have family and friends that are willing to stick by you no matter what. You're going to be all right. You're going to get through this…you just need to be careful, Lanni. Tapping into who you are is going to bring a lot of temptations with it."

I smiled and snuggled into her more. "I love you, Mommy."

"I love you too, Lanni. Now…lets get you those memories back…" Mom said with a smile.

I nodded at that and helped her to draw some symbols and light some candles, Mom reading the incantation and making me drink something. I didn't even bother to ask her what it was that I was ingesting either because I honestly didn't want to know and then there was a searing pain that ripped through my head and I passed out, only to wake back up and looked up at the ceiling.

"My head is _throbbing_," I told her, taking a deep breath. "But it's getting better."

Mom nodded and lay down next to me on the floor. "It'll get better. Give it a few more minutes."

"Alright," I said calmly.

I closed my eyes and let everything settle in, smiling because I could remember—I could remember all sorts of things and even some of my childhood memories clearer. Some of which made me open my eyes and look at her, her just nodding at me like she knew what it was that I had seen. My God…the angels certainly had some sort of plan going on because this wasn't a coincidence.

"When I was little I knew Sam and Dean…" I said gently.

She nodded at me. "Yes, you did. Bobby and I helped John to get started when he wanted to avenge Mary but things were too hard. Your father didn't want John to get stronger and he didn't want me near Mary's kids so I had to erase it—block all of the memories so that everyone was safe."

"My dad is an asshole," I said slowly, looking back up at the ceiling.

"Yes, but I think it's time that you go upstairs and talk to Dean, Sweetheart. He needs some reassurance right about now." Mom said, and I nodded, kissing her cheek and going upstairs.

I opened the door to our room slowly, and put my hands in my pockets after I closed the door behind me, standing there. Dean looked at me as he lounged on the bed, and neither of us said a word. I didn't know what to say, and neither did he, but I had to say _something_…I had to break the ice.

"I think I'm still me." I said lamely. "Mom gave me back my memories."

Dean gave me a look, and then smiled. "Come here…"

I crawled onto the bed with him, climbing on top of him and resting against him, looking him in the eye. He stroked my hair and gazed at me, both of us trying to think of what to say but there was still so much to process right now. My father was the demon that we had been hunting for the last two years—Hell, John, Sam and Dean had been hunting it since Mary was murdered! I was half demon and we'd all known each other when we were little until Mom bolted and I just…this really _was_ heavy.

"Baby, I'm sorry about all of this," I told him. "I think we need to slow down just a little bit on this kids thing because I am _incredibly _messed up and I don't want our children to be messed up—I still want to sleep with you though."

He smirked and stroked my cheek with his thumb. "Of course you do."

I smiled a little and stroked his cheek with my fingers. "I'm sorry you have to deal with all of this—especially this me being the daughter of your enemy thing."

"You're not your father," Dean repeated and kissed me softly.

I nodded slowly. "Strangely, I want to kill him even more now."

Dean cocked his head a little to one side and nodded slowly because he knew what I was talking about. I had switched subjects from us potentially having children together, to my father. Everything had changed and yet nothing had, and that was the weirdest part about all of it honestly. I mean I _still_ wanted to kill him…and I _still_ needed to activate this Rune but now I was afraid to use my powers even more.

"He abandoned you, destroyed everything you loved, and sent a lackey to kill you—I understand," he told me.

I nodded at that. "He also killed your father, destroyed everything you loved, and I just—I want him dead. I—I have his genes, Dean."

"You're still my Lanni." Dean told me with a smile. "How many times do I have to say it? I love you, and that's never going to change…though when we're finally feeling more pieced together I probably won't say it as often."

I laughed and kissed him. "I really hope you don't ever change…well I mean someday when we have children I hope you can use the word 'love' more but…I love you the way you are. Know that, alright? I would never change you."

Dean chuckled and kissed me back. "We should try again."

"You just don't quit, do you?" I asked him, and kissed him when he smirked and shook his head.

xx

**Sam's POV**

I had noticed that Lance was feeling incredibly uncomfortable but I had absolutely no idea _why_ at this point because he kept hanging out with Annie, Kate and Kalli. He was surrounded by three _beautiful_ women and I was starting to feel like Kate had been onto something: maybe he _was_ still in love with Lana. That would explain why he was surrounded by women and still not okay. Then again, then I stumbled onto a conversation I hadn't been expecting to hear.

"Has anyone else noticed how simply delectable Sammy is when he scrunches up that adorable nose of his?" Kalli asked and I choked a little on my coffee from the other room.

"No, I hadn't," Annie said aloud.

Kate laughed a little. "Have you noticed how cute he is when he gets stumped on a case and pouts?"

"Oh my God this is totally not worth it!" Lance exclaimed. "If it's not hearing about Dean and Lan-Bon going at it like rabbits, it's hearing about Sam scrunching up his nose and pouting and being all hot and tempting. STOP!"

"Someone sounds jealous that Sam is bigger than him," Kate said and I heard high fives.

I shifted uncomfortably on the couch and looked at the book I was reading, trying to pretend like I hadn't heard the girls in the kitchen. I mean it was a boost to my ego, and I was flattered since I'd taken a liking to Kate the second we'd met and now we were dating and sleeping together, but come on. This was far too good to be true—normally _Dean_ had two girls after him at once…not _me_.

"I think you girls are making Lance uncomfortable," Florence said and I heard her start to stir something—she was making dinner.

Kate sighed loudly. "Sorry…there's just nothing else to talk about. I mean Lana and Dean are all patched up and I'm glad—no one should break them apart."

"Exactly!" Annie agreed quickly. "They're in love and they want to be together and they deserve it. Now, I want some nieces and/or nephews out of it too."

"Yeah, but the point I was trying to make, Annie, is that cute as they are, right now they're boring." Kate said, sipping some more coffee. "I mean I love them, and we've all heard their sex life—it's awesome—but come on there's a hot, intelligent, _amazing_ guy out there on the couch who's getting _no_ attention."

"I can fix that!" Kalli exclaimed and I shifted again.

"If you hit on my boyfriend, Kalli Elizabeth Newman, I will shave your hair off while you sleep," Kate said pointedly, and I had to laugh a little bit.

She and her sisters were really close from what I had heard and even though Kate was the eldest and had threatened her, Kalli came into the living room and plopped right down on the couch next to me. Kate muttered into her coffee that Kalli was signing her own death warrant and though a little bit upset, Annie snorted and then shook her head and helped her mother to cook.

"You're very attractive," Kalli told me.

"Hmm?" I asked her, blushing a little. "Sure you're talking to the right brother?"

"You're attractive, Sammy. Can I buy you dinner or something?" Kalli asked, flashing a smile that made me laugh awkwardly.

Kate scoffed and rolled her eyes. "Someone is dying to have a new do tomorrow…"

I smiled at her. "You can sit next to me at dinner. I promised Florence that I'd try her fettuccine."

"Okay," Kalli told me, and she seemed thoroughly excited. "So what are you reading?"

"I actually stole Lan's Shakespeare book from her," I explained to her.

Kalli smirked. "A boy who likes Shakespeare, huh? That's just very…hot."

I blushed some more. "Thanks."

"Okay, knock it off," Kate said as she came over, sitting on my lap and looking at her sister. "The large, sexy brunette reading the Shakespeare is mine and you cannot have him. You may sit next to him at dinner, but if your hand goes anywhere near his dick, I will be rather angry."

"KATELYN!" Florence exclaimed loudly.

All of the women laughed loudly, even Florence, but I knew that my face was beet red right now. Kalli was snorting with laughter and went to go and take Annie outside and Kate pressed her lips to mine, which made me rather happy and I kissed her back. There was really no doubt about it: I was falling for Kate Newman and I honestly didn't know what to do about it.

"Sorry about my sister." Kate told me, tugging on my lip with her teeth. "She flirts with everything."

I shook my head. "No, no—it's not your fault so don't apologize, really."

"So you wanna maybe…take a little turn out back?" Kate asked me.

"Sure, I'd like that." I told her with a smile.

She smiled back and then the two of us went out in the back yard and we walked a little in the cool night air. I glanced at Kate who seemed to be thinking and then I looked in front of me and thought about it. This girl had come into my life when I was least expecting it and made me feel all sorts of things for her that I hadn't felt in a really long time. Then it took us a long time to even have sex and because of that, all of my feelings for her were deep and genuine and true and I just…

"You're being the pensive thinker. What's up?" Kate asked me.

I looked at her. "Whatever do you mean?"

"Look, Sammy, the only reason that Kalli came onto you was because I can't stop talking about you, okay?" Kate said, waving her hands around and then continuing to walk even though I paused. "One minute I'm telling her that I love you and the next she's talking about testing you because she does that. She's very protective and she won't let me love just anyone…not after Cooper."

"You…what?" I asked her.

Kate turned around to look at me. "I love you, okay? I want what Dean and Lana have and I want it with you."

"I'm glad you brought Lan back, Kate." I told her, smiling at her and stepping closer to her. "I'm glad you did it for him."

"It wasn't _just_ for him but…you're welcome," she told me, and she reached out to touch my arm. "Now do you remember the part where I said that I love you?"

I smiled at her. "Oh, you want me to say it back?"

"You're already cute, stop showing off," she told me, pushing my arm playfully. "If you're going to say it, Sammy, just say it."

"Kate? I love you too."

xx

**Lana's POV**

Honestly I have to say that dinner was only _mostly_ enjoyable. Sam was getting a _lot _of the attention if not _all _of it, and yet he was focusing on Kate of course. I thought it was cute because I thought Kate and Sam were completely compatible and obviously something had happened between them, but Dean was getting annoyed that none of the attractive girls wanted _him _and I knew that was just kind of his default but he had _me _and he wanted _me _so…why was he so upset? Was it just because he was used to feeling wanted by women and now he only had me? I didn't get this male need to be hit on…

"My God, can people stop goggling Sam, please?" Dean asked aloud.

I just kept looking at my food and I sighed loudly. I mean I wasn't in love with Sam and I didn't mind the attention he was getting in the slightest but again _Dean_ was upset about him and that would bring his inner flirt out. He was used to having attention and he liked to wave it off and explain he was taken so actually the more I thought it out the more it made sense to me…and yet _still_ bugged me at the same time.

"What are you talking about?" Kalli asked him. "There's no goggling going on here. Just some…footsie."

Dean looked at her. "Foostie?"

"You sound jealous," I said, looking at him.

Dean scoffed, but he was jealous—you could tell. Dean Winchester, the ladies' man, was no longer the center of attention and it was killing him a little inside that _three _attractive females were vying for _Sam's _attention instead. Dean was right then _second_ to his younger brother: the more reserved, less obnoxious, intelligent, soft spoken yet still incredibly sexy, Sam Winchester.

"I am not," Dean said, and ate some mashed potatoes.

We got through dinner with Mom trying to make small talk with all of us, but when it was over, Dean was up to his old self. I knew he loved me, and I knew he wanted to see if he still had it, but he was flirting with my cousin while I read on the couch. He couldn't have waited until I was out of the room to do this?

"So…Kalli…" Dean said his flirt mode officially on.

"Yes, Deano?" Kalli replied, looking away from Sam as he pretended he didn't notice all eyes on him.

"What makes you like a man like Sammy more than me?" Dean asked politely. "Especially a woman as beautiful as you…"

Kalli smiled at him. "Well, Dean, _you're_ taken, and though most girls would find that a challenge that makes them happy inside…I don't."

"Plus, you're rugged and everything, but Sammy is all charming and brilliant and he brings a relationship to the table that he values," Kate said, standing right next to Sam who smiled down at her. "Though I'm biased—I get to sleep with him."

"So do I!" Dean protested. "Not sleep with Sam, but the relationship thing. I mean Lanni and I are getting _married_!"

Annie laughed loudly. "Yeah, and I think you see my point here now, don't you? You don't _value_ the relationship because you're _hitting_ on her cousins…in front of her."

"She knows I don't mean any harm by it, Beautiful," Dean told her with a shrug.

Annie looked over at me as I covered more of my face with my book and Kalli and Kate both told Dean he was hopeless. He probably had more up his sleeve but all eyes in the room turned to Sam when he yawned and stretched and he blushed a little when he noticed. He could no longer walk in this house without being watched with hungry eyes and he was beginning to realize that.

"You know, I could use some help researching this demon, but I only need one person." Sam said, looking at Annie, Kalli and Kate.

I wasn't sure if he was doing it to give Dean and me privacy, or if he really needed help, but Dean went into the kitchen and I sat up as Sam told them he would be up grabbing the laptop. He was giving them all a chance to fight over him and milk this for all it was worth, but he was looking at Kate as he said it. Kate even smiled at him and I knew she'd fight for it, just to prove to them that he was worth it…that or she'd make him think she would and then make him fight for her instead—I thought they were adorable. What a role play…

"Go on up, Kate," Kalli said laughing. "We all know those eyes on you were some weird sex thing."

Kate laughed and shrugged. "When we role play, we really role play. Goodnight guys—we'll keep the sex quiet, I promise."

I smiled at that and stood up. "You know what? I'm going upstairs too, so don't break the house with all that loud sex you're going to have. To the rest of you, I suggest ear muffs or head phones. Tell Dean that the spare blankets are in the closet, and show him how to pull the couch out into a bed."

"You can't go to bed angry at him," Annie protested.

Kalli nodded vigorously. "I agree with her. I washed your bed clothes in that 'Simple Pleasures' softener. The commercial says you can't go to bed mad."

I cracked a smile. "Just let him know…"

I went up the stairs and I lay on my bed, looking up at the ceiling for a moment before I started to read some more. Honestly I couldn't get enough of my Shakespeare, and I looked up as my door opened. I made a face as Dean came into my room and shut the door behind him and he sighed a little. They had obviously told him what I said and yet still here he was trying to be all cute when I was annoyed that he had been hitting on everyone to try and prove a point.

"The spare blankets aren't in here," I told him without looking at him.

Dean crawled onto the bed and planted his hands on either side of me to show me that I wasn't going to get to _go_ anywhere. I lowered the book for a moment and looked at him, his beautiful hazel eyes peering into mine. How could I even be mad at the beautiful man on top of me? I mean how?

"Seriously," I said and Dean cocked his head to one side. "I mean it—I'm annoyed with you. At least flirt with my family members when I'm not right there."

"Lana?" He asked me softly yet firmly.

"What?" I asked, slightly thrown by the 'Lana' part.

"Shut-up and kiss me," he told me.

It was definitely an order and at first I thought about it, but then I gave him a look as he came closer to me and I put my book up. He sighed, and I knew he was annoyed but after flirting with my cousins _in front of me_ he was going to have to work for it. Actually I was honestly feeling a bit horny, but he wasn't off the hook just yet.

"Lanni…" Dean said, trying to get me to cave since he put the nickname back into use.

"You can't just come in here and expect me to forgive you," I told him. "You hit on Kalli _and_ Annie. Only reason you didn't hit on Kate was because Sam was right there, but you know what? I was there too…"

Dean took a deep breath. "I was just—"

"—jealous of the attention Sammy's getting." I finished for him taking the book out from between us and shutting it and placing it on the dresser. "I get that but in _front_ of me?"

"I'm sorry, Baby," Dean replied, his hands traveling down my sides as he kissed my collarbone softly.

Oh, I knew what he was trying to do and I _knew_ that it was going to work, but I wasn't going to cave this easy. He apologized and I believed him and I loved what he was doing with his mouth but we had more banter in us than this. Besides, if I acted a little madder, he'd have to pull out some more things to try and 'get me to cave'.

"That doesn't make flirting with them better." I said, trying very hard not to cave right then and there, but he was using his tongue around my earlobe now and I wanted to rip his clothes off.

"You know, you're sexy when you're angry," Dean told me, and I kissed him before pushing him off.

"Okay, we do this my way," I said and I got up even though Dean pouted, backing up towards the bathroom. "I snuck out while the others were out and you were showering, and I bought you a present. Go downstairs into the den, and wait for me. I _promise_ you it's worth it."

Dean raised an eyebrow but left the room, and I changed into the lingerie I had bought and pulled a see through robe on over it, smirking in the mirror. Oh yeah. He was going to be a _very_ happy boy tonight—thank goodness the den was soundproof. I went downstairs after grabbing a mixed CD and Kalli and Kate both looked up and I shrugged at them—this was totally fine.

"Someone is going to be very, _very_, happy tonight," Kalli said with an approving nod. "I like the outfit."

Kate laughed and nodded too. "Something tells me Dean is going to _love_ it."

"God, I hope so," I told them.

"Well don't keep him waiting!" Kalli said pointing to the den.

I laughed and went into the den, smiling when I saw Dean poking the logs in the fireplace. He looked over at me when he heard me shut the door and he looked stunned for a moment, his eyes raking over me. It was definitely a reaction that I was going for and I put my hands on my hips after pushing some hair off of one of my shoulders.

"You like?" I asked him. "I mean it's nothing fancy but—"

"—I like _very_ much." Dean interrupted me.

I smiled at him and glanced down at the black and red outfit I was wearing and looked up when I heard Dean's hands move. He was started to unbutton his shirt and I shook my head because that was _not_ how this encounter was _supposed _to be going and I was sure part of him _knew_ that.

"No, no, no. This is your way of repaying me. I get to undress you," I said, and slowly crossed over to the stereo, and put the CD in, ALO's '_**Girl I Wanna Lay You Down**_' coming on, and I turned to Dean. "Come here…"

Dean smirked at me as I put on the most commanding tone that I could muster and Dean crossed over to me as the song began to play, and rested his hands on my waist. He looked down at me with lust in his eyes and I knew that my eyes were matching his right then. We both wanted this, and there was _no_ reason to deny it from each other.

"I could get used to you being forceful…" he whispered his face close to mine as they began to sing.

**I come over, early in the morning**

**Just like a heat wave without warning**

**And when I touch you my heart begins to flutter**

**Cause you're smooth and creamy like peanut butter**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**I said girl, I wanna lay you down**

**I'm gonna flood you like a love river**

**Ah, baby the postman is about to deliver**

**I cook you up some dinner, a little pasta**

**Listen to some music, a little rasta**

**I said girl, I wanna lay you down**

**I said girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Ah baby, baby**

**Don't you know I need your love?!**

**So turn out the lights, bring out the candles**

**Wrap your arms around my love handles**

**They say that passion may not always endure**

**But this feeling that I have for you is burning up my world**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**I said girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

**Girl, I wanna lay you down**

Dean kissed me gently, and I returned it, stopping his hands as he tried to slip the robe off as the kiss grew between us. There was just something about the lyrics and our actions at the same time that was getting to both of us, but it was _my _turn to be in charge and he had to let me be. He moaned a little in protest to me stopping him, and I slowly backed him up into the wall, pressing myself against him.

"That song was like the thoughts in my head," Dean whispered to me, whining a little. "This feeling that I have for you is burning up my—"

I kissed him suddenly, pressing my lips to his, sliding my tongue into his mouth and smiling when he relaxed a bit. I pulled away slowly, tugging on his lower lip a little with my teeth before I began to unbutton his shirt and my lips traveled to his sternum, nibbling a little as his breathing changed. My lips traveled down his torso as I unbuttoned his shirt, and once unbuttoned all the way, I nibbled right below his belly button and he shifted a little, moaning.

"Honey, can we please get my pants unfastened before you do that?" He breathed softly.

I smirked and looked at him, bringing my face close to his, my voice a whisper. "Makes you that happy, does it?"

His lips collided with mine, and his hands ran along the lace, causing me to shiver happily. Maybe it was just the fire, but I felt like his hands were adding heat to my body everywhere that he ran his hands and I loved it—_every _bit of it. I felt more desire creep into me as he slid the robe down my arms, and his lips traveled down to my neck, where he sucked on the skin. I moaned slightly, giggling and smirking when he pinned me to the wall, and tugged on the robe, it fluttering to the floor.

"You wanna take over now?" I whispered, moaning a little more as his lips traveled down to my sternum. "I'll take that as a 'yes'."

I giggled slightly as '_**I'll Take That as a Yes**_' by Phil Vassar came on, and Dean pressed up against me a little harder, and then pulled me down onto the rug with him in one fast motion. It wasn't his kind of music selection—this song or a lot of the ones I made him listen to—but the lyrics and the beat made him tolerate it. Our breathing, and the touching and the way the music was making us feel, was helping to make him even _more_ hot and bothered than he already was.

**You like a dozen wine red roses**

**Candle lights on porcelain set tables**

**And that's fine**

**Well, I'll go out of my way for you anytime, that's right**

**The fire's warm so you take off your sweater**

**Now it's my turn and I'll do you one better**

**That's the game we both like to play**

**You wink, I laugh 'cause we know**

**A little hug leads to a foot rub**

**Then a hot tub**

**Then a french kiss on a bear rug**

**Do you like it**

**Do you like it**

**How about this**

**Wanna try it?**

**Oh, oh, oh**

**I'll take that as a yes**

**You like snugglin' with your pillow**

**With my arms tight holdin' us together**

**Breathin' deep**

**Driftin' like a feather in a stream**

**Then I touch you on the shoulder**

**Feel your skin soft underneath my fingers**

**And I know we'll never get to sleep**

**You wink, I laugh 'cause we know**

**A little hug leads to a foot rub**

**Then a hot tub**

**Then a french kiss on a bear rug**

**Do you like it**

**Do you like it**

**How about this**

**Wanna try it?**

**Oh, oh, oh**

**I'll take that as a yes**

**It's written all over your face**

**There's no mistake, no guess, no doubt**

**No beatin' around the bush**

**Baby it's understood**

**You wink, I laugh 'cause we know**

**A little hug leads to a foot rub**

**Then a hot tub**

**Then a french kiss on a bear rug**

**Do you like it**

**Do you like it**

**How about this**

**Wanna try it?**

**Oh, oh, oh**

**I'll take that as a yes**

**I'll take that as a yes**

**I'll take that as a yes**

**Cuz we know**

**That a little hug leads to a foot rub hot tub bear rug**

**I like it**

**I like it**

Dean's lips traveled down to my belly button, where he kissed around it before his tongue darted into it and then he smirked when I arched my back a little. My whole body was on fire and as Dean's tongue traveled farther south I realized just _how_ much I wanted him to touch me everywhere. I mean I felt like this about Dean Winchester _all_ the time, but right now it was like every feeling was so much more intense.

"Foreplay is exhausting," I whispered, smiling a little as ours eyes met.

"Baby, we're just getting started," he whispered back.

I giggled as he slid his body up mine, and looked me in the eye. "God, you have stamina."

"It's part of my charm," he told me and I felt his fingers push inside of me with ease.

"For some reason I want to eat you up today," I whispered, and kissed him, but pulled away before he could kiss me back. "I need your pants off now, honey because what you're doing with your fingers is _not_ fair."

"How badly do you want them to come off?" Dean asked me.

My lust-blown eyes blazed into his. "Badly…"

Dean nodded, and got off of me, leaving me to groan in protest at the loss of his touch, but I'd asked. I propped myself up on my arms as he undid his belt slowly, backing up a couple steps like it was _his_ turn to make _me_ work for. Oh, that was how it was now, huh? I officially had no more power over him?

"You are a tease, Mr. Winchester," I told him.

"And you love every minute of it, Ms. Meckenzie," he replied, slowly taking the belt out of the belt loops.

"I do believe that undressing you is _my_ job, Mr. Winchester," I said, biting my lip as he cocked his head to one side all sexy-like.

He smirked on top of it all. "Well, Ms. Meckenzie, I have to entertain you too."

"Boy, I wanna lay you down," I said, and began to unlace the corset part of the ensemble.

"Now, now, _that's_ for me to do." Dean told me, and I smirked.

"Oh, is it now?" I asked, smiling as he unfastened his pants and came back down on the rug with me. "What dirty things are going through your mind?"

He just smirked and kissed me in response, and I let him remove the rest of the clothing that either of us had, and we lay on the rug in front of the fire, kissing each other for a little while, Dean's hands roaming. Dean grunted when my hands traveled down his damp skin and found his aching member, working it in the ways I remembered how. I closed my eyes and felt his teeth on my neck as he moved himself against my hand and I honestly just wanted to get to the act and then we could play some more again and go a few times…was that too much to ask?

"If making up is this beautiful, I want to fight more," Dean whispered as I nibbled on his neck now instead since he was focused on not 'embarrassing himself' while I had him in my hands.

"I hope you don't mean that," I said, though I smiled a little. "I want this to be this good _without_ the fighting. Still, angry sex…we should role play that sometime…"

Dean wiggled his eyebrows in agreement as he kissed me again, and then '_**Iris**_' by The Goo Goo Dolls came on, and we both knew where this was headed—right now. I opened my mouth to take a breath as Dean pushed his flesh inside of mine and I matched the pace he set with ease, our hands sliding as we kissed and moved against each other. Our bodies danced in the firelight for a while before we had to take a break, and I kissed his wet chest softly, my body collapsed on top of his.

"Marry me." Dean told me, pushing my hair out of my face.

I struggled for a breath. "How romantic to ask now…."

"Baby? Just say 'yes'…" Dean said, catching his breath as well.

"Of course my answer is 'yes'," I told him, rolling my eyes.

He smiled and kissed me. "Good…"

"Think we can beat our record?" I asked in a flirty whisper, my lips traveling to his jaw where I bit down softly.

"Absolutely," he chuckled.

xx

**Sam's POV**

Honestly I didn't think I could be any happier when Kate told me that she loved me, but then she had research for us. It sounded weird, but Kate and I actually enjoyed doing hunting together and I loved flipping through spell books and having Kate tell me about spells she liked to do. Yeah, she and Lana were pretty different from other women, but they were beautiful, intelligent and _good_…and Dean and I loved them.

Wasn't that all that mattered?

"Where are Lana and Dean?" I asked as I found Kate, a spell book in my hands.

Kate looked at her with a big smile on her face. "Lana and Dean are going to be indisposed for a while. Those two are—"

"—kinky and in love," Kalli finished for her.

"Where are they?" Annie asked firmly which made Kate and Kalli stop giggling.

"In the den, why?" Kalli asked us.

Annie shrugged a bit. "I just had things in there, that's all."

Kate and Kalli laughed and told her not to expect to get it any time soon and I sat next to Kate as Florence came into the room. She still wanted to be able to train Lana a bit since she was half demon and it made me wonder a bit if maybe she had any tricks up her sleeves for psychics too. She did seem to know quite a bit about demons.

"Florence?" I asked slowly.

She smiled at me as Kate leaned her head against me. "Yes, Sam?"

"Do you…do you think that you can help me with my psychic problem?" I managed to ask her.

"Sam, it's not a problem, it's who you are whether you like it or not," Florence explained to me, shrugging a little bit. "I can help you, but something tells me that you're not going to need it because you're already good—you and Annie both."

"You think I'm good?" I asked her slowly, smiling a bit.

"I think you are, yeah," Florence responded brightly. "I think that you are just who Mary and John would want you to be and I know it might not seem like it because John was so focused on hunting and everything, but he loved you and your brother and would want you to be safe and happy. You and Dean both…"

"Oh they're happy all right." Kalli said, Kate and Annie cracking smiles because we all knew in _what way_ Lana and Dean were happy.

"Just have faith in yourself, Sam," Florence said as she rustled my hair like a mother would do to her son and it made me grin.

No one could ever replace the mother that I had lost but I hadn't known her at all because I was six months old when she did. Florence was acting like I was her son and I loved the motherly affection because I had never really had motherly affection before and it was nice to know that she had my back. Of course there were things about her that we didn't know and there were things about her that we never would know, but it was nice right here with her.

"You're a good person, Sam, and congratulations with Kate, by the way," Florence told me gently.

Then Florence went upstairs to her room after telling the others to get to bed soon and Annie headed straight up after her mother. Then Kate went into the kitchen to grab some hot chocolate before telling me to come up to her room to work on the case in a bit, and Kalli came over to me. I wasn't quite sure what it was that she was going to say or do next, but I did start blushing because I expected the worst.

"Don't hurt my sister," Kalli said firmly, but she was smiling. "Letting a man into her heart is hard for her and all my life she has protected Kat and I, okay? So you protect her and you love her, or I'll be cutting it off."

I smiled at her and nodded. "I promise that I won't hurt her, okay? I love her too."

"Good," Kalli said before she wished me a 'goodnight' and went up to sleep.

Nodding, I grabbed my laptop and went up to Kate's room, knocking on the door and thinking it all over. I had this beautiful girl that loved me and I loved her too and I couldn't wait to see what our futures had in store for us because we were trying to be together. Kate answered the door in pajama pants and a tight t-shirt on and my breath hitched in my throat a moment, taking me out of my thoughts.

"Ready to research?" Kate asked me with a smile.

I smiled back. "Yeah…yeah I am."

"Then come on in but I swear if you hog the whole bed, I'm gonna have to get Annie to cut you," she teased as I walked in, shutting the door behind us and we both laughed. "I'm glad you took that as a joke, Sammy. Now, research and then sex…"

xx

**Lana's POV**

I pulled the sheet up around me more when I woke up the next morning, giggling a little when Dean kissed my back. We had a sheet _and_ a blanket even though we were on the floor and in front of a fire. We had both been practical and knew the fire had to go out eventually and that meant we should be warm and have more than just each other's body heat to keep us nice and cozy.

"How long have you been awake?" I asked him.

He shrugged against me. "A little while. You whispered my name in your sleep, followed by a 'please don't stop, I like it'."

"Must have been one hell of a dream I can't remember," I told him, a smirk on my face.

I turned over and kissed him, running my hand along his right arm as I lay on my right side, my body to his. He stroked my hair and kissed me back, cradling me with his whole body and I loved how I fit so perfectly into him. As cheesy as it sounded, it was almost like we were made to fit like this—like we were the missing puzzle pieces to finish off a jigsaw puzzle.

"That ring fits nicely on your finger," Dean whispered, and smiled before he kissed me again.

I smiled too and nodded. "I like it much better on my finger. It was becoming like a lost love thing around my neck…I'm never taking this off, by the way. This ring right here means you own my ass…and every other part of me. I own you too—not that we're property, but you know what I mean."

"I tried watching television," Dean admitted, chuckling at what I'd said.

"And found that the DVD player was on and the 6 hour version of 'Pride and Prejudice' with Colin Firth was in it?" I asked him, laughing.

He nodded slowly. "Yeah, and when I turned it off…"

I looked him in the eye was he trailed off and gave me a look and I laughed. He had to be kidding…was he kidding? It was hilarious if he wasn't, but at the same time it would bruise his ego a little and I liked my baby's ego _un_bruised thank you very much. Still, maybe knocked down a peg or two was also nice, but I liked being able to be all playful like this with him too.

"You're kidding," I told him.

"Sadly I'm not. Everything I did to you and you didn't want me to stop the movie," he told me shaking his head and when I laughed again he shot me a look.

"Oh honey, I don't want you to stop what you do to me either." I assured him, kissing him, and then nibbling on his bottom lip a little.

Dean smirked at me. "You wanna go again, Princess?"

It was the first time he'd ever called me 'Princess', but he was being playful and I kind of liked it. Nothing would ever replace 'Baby', but 'Princess' definitely worked and I could get used to it…not gonna lie. So I just giggled and I nodded, running my hands along his arms and slipping them down to his abs.

"Absolutely, Mr. Winchester," I told him, kissing him gently.

"Hmmm…have I told you how badly I want to call you _Mrs. _Winchester? Alana Rose Winchester sounds wonderful…" he whispered, kissing me again.

I was a little off guard, but I smiled and kissed him again. "Oh, I owe you another couple times at least. Please allow me to do you that honor, Mr. Winchester."

"Of course, Mrs. Winchester," he replied playfully.

I crawled on top of him, making a trail of kisses down to his sternum, and then right before anything fun happened, there was a knock on the den door. Dean groaned and so did I, both of us sighing loudly and making eye contact. On the one hand we wanted to just ignore the knocking and get back to it, but on the other hand, what if it was important and we were needed?

"We should get that," I told him softly. "They could need us."

Dean nodded and I got up reluctantly, pulling the sheet around me and leaving Dean the blanket to cover himself with. I opened up the door a crack to see my mother standing there with clothes and I smiled a little, a blush rising. She was my mother and to get Annie she pretty much had to have sex, but still it was weird. Even though my mother had had sex before, talking about it with her was kind of awkward, honestly.

"Breakfast, Kidlet," Mom told me.

I nodded and smiled. "Okay, Momma. We'll be right there."

"I already had Annie grab you clothes," Mom said, and I took them through the crack before thanking her and closing the door.

"You owe me tonight," Dean said with a smile on his face.

I laughed loudly. "For a man who says he _isn't _a machine, you sure as Hell _act _like you are."

"Trying for a baby means having a lot of sex—_you _should know this," Dean told me.

I rolled my eyes but smiled too, because honestly after proposing the man had won me over. If Dean Winchester wanted me to have his baby so damn bad than so be it, but that meant that even if I was pregnant he had to let me tag along with him, Kate and Sam. I wanted to be with Dean and I would follow him absolutely _anywhere _and I was glad that he knew that, and that things were going so great right now. That could last, right?

Dean took my hand, our fingers lacing together after we were dressed. "Red is definitely your color, Baby."

"Thank you," I told him. "You look mighty fine yourself in that green—it brings out the forest green in your beautiful eyes."

Dean rolled his eyes and then kissed me, happy with the compliment and we both went out to the kitchen and sat next to each other at the kitchen table. Kate and Sam were talking to each other happily and I had no idea what was going on, but I smiled and jumped a little when I felt Dean's fingers on my knees. Honestly if Dean and I could around the whole eating thing and the sleeping and the being around people, we'd prolly spend all of our time in bed together…we needed to get out and hunt…

"You two seem happy," I told Kate.

Kate just beamed and Kalli shrugged a little. "Sammy and I have been researching and we think we may have a hunt. Honestly, why didn't you tell me how good at digging up information and hacking into things he was?"

"I just figured it was obvious," I said with a shrug and started eating some pancakes, jumping slightly again. "Dean…"

Dean smirked at me. "Sorry…I just want you."

"The feeling's mutual," I told him with a smile, eating the piece of pancake off of my fork while keeping eye contact with him.

"Sweetheart, Paige called," Mom said, coming into the kitchen. "Something happened last night and she's in the hospital."

**Note: Oh man all of the new characters and the weird hunt and the couplings! The next chapter finishes up this hunt and moves onto the next one and man this was 30 pages! What do you think about Azazel being Lana's father? Feedback is always appreciated!**


	28. Worst Month Ever

**AUTHOR'S NOTE:**

**Yeah, I forgot that there was another couple deaths so…this chapter is sad, but there's some fluff. There's also some arguing in it and you'll probably be all, "wtf?" but the argument won't be discussed in length until the end of the next chapter.**

**WARNINGS: Rated "M" for Sex, Language, Dirty Thoughts, Innuendo, Blood, Violence and Dark Themes.**

**ENJOY!**

xxxx

When I got to the hospital, I had no problems getting in to see Paige, which was kind of amazing. I had expected there to be a lot more security since she had been pretty badly beaten up, but there wasn't. I was on her list of people to see her, and since Dean was with me, they let him in too.

Part of me felt relieved that I hadn't done this—but it was still my fault because my father had done it and so I felt guilty about it. There was so much going on and while I had my memories back, it just felt like all of this had happened for a reason and I wanted to know what that reason was. Was my father trying to taunt me? Did he want me to seek him out? Was he after Sam and Dean? Did he want my mother? Why was Paige mixed up in the middle of this?

"You okay?" Dean asked me.

I nodded, but really, I wasn't—I didn't feel well. I felt nauseous, especially since she had started to become one of my friends, and there was nothing I could do for her now. She was just lying there, unconscious. How did she call then? Did Mom just get it wrong? She had to have. The doctor said Paige had been unconscious for hours…the _nurse_ had to have phoned our house.

"Dean…do you think you can get me some coffee?" I asked him.

Dean nodded, and left the room, leaving me to sit in the chair near the bed, and I took her hand in mine. I didn't know what to do. I was starting to hate hospitals—hate everything about them. It was all starting to be one crappy thing after another. I didn't want to be here anymore…if I was going to be alive again, I wanted to start over _away_ from a hospital.

"Lana?" Paige asked groggily, waking up.

I squeezed her hand. "I'm here…"

"Good," Paige said, smiling and opening up her eyes. "You okay?"

"Am I okay?" I asked with a broken smile. "I'm fine. We should all be asking you if you're okay."

Paige shrugged, but cringed as she did so. "I'm fine, hon."

I smiled and stroked her hair, and we both looked at each other. I had to ask the question, and she was expecting it, but neither of us said anything. She had been with me when my eyes flashed and she hunted things and I needed to know if she had seen what had hurt her…if his eyes had flashed yellow too. It was just that right now it wasn't worth it—all that mattered right now was making sure that she was okay and I could deal with my father after that.

"Here's your coffee," Dean said, and then he just kind of nodded at Paige. "Hi…"

"Hi," Paige replied, smiling.

It kind of made me sad that my new friend and my fiancé didn't get along—not in the slightest. He hated her. He thought she was taking me away from him, and though it wasn't true at the same time she and I shared something Dean didn't share with me—school. I just wanted them to get along, but it was far too much to ask and I knew that and to be fair, I wouldn't be staying in school. I had left school behind me for a reason and there were online classes I could take to do something if I really wanted to.

"So what did that to you?" Dean asked, sipping his own coffee, and not really caring about the response, but pretending like he did.

Paige looked at me. "You're not the demon they think you are. It was a Greplin…"

"A Greplin?" Dean asked, raising his eyebrows.

"A Greplin is a demon that takes over a person's body. It's like possession, only it's more like one body going into another. They pretty much become one with the person they're 'haunting', in a sense, and they feed. They use the person's body as their house." I explained to him. "Honestly they're parasites only demonic."

Paige nodded at that. "Some of them gain more control than others, depending on how weak the host is, and they start to kill. The only sign of them is a symbol on the back of their neck."

"How do you two know this?" Dean asked us.

"I've run into one before," I told him, looking at the bed. "One possessed Jen for a while years and years ago. It was Junior High, I believe."

"I've just read about them," Paige said with a shrug. "That must have been rough. I know how close you and Jen are."

I smiled and nodded at that because she really didn't know _how_ close Jen and I were. Hell in High School we hung out so much that our periods came a day apart and we told each other _everything_—even things we shouldn't. Like Jen knew I liked being on top and I knew Kevin was a biter—I mean it's far too much information but she was my best friend and I was hers and that was just how we rolled.

"It was definitely hard," I told her. "Mom got me through it though—Bethany."

Dean nodded slowly. "The only mother you really knew until now."

Paige grasped my hand. "It was in your mother, Lana."

"Mom?" I asked suddenly. "That's ridiculous…"

"Completely ridiculous," Dean agreed with me.

Paige sighed loudly. "I know you don't want to believe it, but I can prove it."

"How do we kill it?" Dean asked her.

I was still kind of reeling from the information presented here that it was inside of my _mother_. And why did I have blood on my hands before and how…things just _weren't_ adding up. Still, Dean had asked a question and so I shook the thoughts away and looked at him, his eyes practically boring into mine.

I took a breath. "You have to kill the host in most cases—if the demon hasn't gotten truly violent yet though, there's an injection that kills it from the inside out without hurting the host. That's how I got it out of Jen."

"What do you classify as truly violent?" Dean asked me.

"In some cases, the host is so strong that there's no way you can get close enough to it to give it the antidote, or it has taken over so completely, that it's immune." Paige explained. "There are actually a few mass murderers in history that were Greplins."

I sighed loudly. "Which means we have to figure this out _now_ because if Mom has one in her and she makes even one more kill…she's as good as dead, as bad as that sounds."

Dean nodded, and I kissed Paige's forehead, leaving with Dean to go and see Mom because I needed answers. I still wasn't convinced that it was inside of her, and Dean refused to leave me alone with her in the same room, but I needed him to—this was _my_ fight. This was _my_ mother.

"Lanni, don't tell me 'no' again. You know how I feel about you running around getting yourself into trouble." Dean told me. "Besides…you never know."

I gave him a look when he pointed at my stomach. "You don't honestly think that your sperm and my eggs are making cookies already do you?"

"Wow do you have a way with words," Dean told me, laughing a little. "Those would be really gross cookies even _I _wouldn't eat."

"Eh," I said with a playful shrug and a smile, "I was just gifted like that. Come on, Dean…_please_ let me try this on my own? I _promise_ you that I will call you if I really need your help."

Dean sighed loudly. "I don't like this."

I nodded, and then got my phone out of my pocket as it rang. "What's up, Paige?"

"Get Annie and your mother to come with you to my house. Since I'm awake and recovering, the doctor released me." Paige explained to me. "Just…I hate to sound terrible, but don't bring Dean. He doesn't trust me, and I'm afraid he'll mess things up."

"What if I promise he won't?" I asked her sighing.

Paige sighed too. "I just—I want your mother to come out of this, and he distracts you. You have to have your wits about you."

"He actually keeps me the most sane, but fine," I told her. "I'll be there soon."

I hung up the phone and looked at Dean and I bit my lip because things _still_ weren't adding up for me. How did it get into Mom? Why in the world wouldn't I have noticed with my newly heightened demonic senses? What was with Paige asking for Dean not to come? I mean yeah, I got what she was saying about him being a distraction but…Dean would _never_ put my family in jeopardy…I _honestly_ believed that.

"Annie, Mom and I are going over to Paige's," I told him as he stood there, waiting for an answer.

Dean gave me a look. "What? Did that bitch tell you to make me stay here?"

"Dean, she's my friend," I told him sighing loudly. "I'd really appreciate it if you wouldn't call her a bitch."

"I just don't trust her," Dean said, resting his hands on my waist.

I took a deep breath. "I trust _her _I just don't trust the _situation_. Can you just…let Kate, Lance and Sam know what's up and let Annie, Mom and I deal with Paige and the weirdness?"

"I hate this," Dean said, letting go of me and backing up a step.

"So do I," I said with a nod.

"No," Dean shook his head. "I hate that you don't trust me as much as Paige. You've known me practically two years, and her only a few days and yet you're doing _exactly_ what _she_ told you to do by making me stay put."

I gave Dean a look. "There is _no_ way that I trust _her_ more than _you_. Hell I don't trust anyone other than _Jen _more than you! I think you're over-reacting!"

"Really? I don't," he said angrily. "If you need me, don't call. I'm done trying to get you to listen to reason."

I was shocked. "Dean, I'm not making you stay because I don't trust you! I'm making you stay because this is _my_ fight and I don't think the demon is _really_ in my mother!"

"Yeah, well maybe killing the demon is _my_ fight!" Dean retorted.

I honestly had _no_ idea how we had gotten here suddenly nor why Dean was so damned upset with me. What the Hell was going on and where was the Dean that I knew and loved? Why did he think I didn't trust him even though I'd told him that I had? Why was he turning all of this around on me? Where did I make my mistake that led to this?

"He's _my_ father, Dean. He's taken from me," I tried, confused.

Dean scoffed at that. "Yeah? He killed my mother, and my father, and he's going to use my brother as one of his soldiers of darkness. You wanna compare how much _you've_ lost to him?"

"He left me, Dean! Abandoned me, Annie, and my mother, and for what? Then he sent someone after me to _kill_ me! He killed me and I get brought back and this is how you want us to end up? You want to fight me over this petty little battle I want to fight myself?" I asked him. "It's like I'm pregnant and you want me safe but news flash—I'm _not_ pregnant! Not yet! I might never be!"

"I'm not having this conversation anymore, Lana. Just go," Dean told me.

I nodded sadly, but I wasn't willing to cry and I just looked at him as he looked at me. I didn't know how we'd gotten here, or what I had said, but he was making his choice and that was that so I had to make mine. I took the ring off of my finger and I took his hand, making him take it.

"When you're ready to stop acting like we're kids and I stole the last cookie, you can give it back. Until then, stop being an ass." I told him.

I went inside the house and got Annie and Mom, who were more than willing to go to Paige's with me to make sure she was okay and to figure this all out. I went to my room and got into my bookcase, grabbing a book that wasn't really a book, getting the injection out of it. There was only one dose left of the stash that I had, so this was the only chance we had. Going downstairs, I met Mom and Annie outside, the syringe in my pocket, and I tucked my hair behind my ears—the Impala was gone.

xx

When we got to Paige's house, there was something different about her…something was off about her. She seemed so much more—so healed. She didn't look as maimed or beaten as she had looked in the hospital and Mom was giving her a look. Annie felt how uncomfortable I was and then Mom looked at us.

"Annie, Lana—go…" Mom ordered.

"Don't listen to her, Lana," Paige told me. "She's the Greplin."

Annie looked at me. "This was all a con?"

"I don't know," I told her slowly.

"You actually think Mom's a Greplin?" Annie asked me again.

"Paige is the Greplin," Mom said, and Annie and I looked at her.

Paige scoffed loudly. "I am not."

"Then show them the back of your neck," Mom told her, holding up her hair to show us that there was absolutely no mark.

Yeah so my theory had definitely been spot on—nothing wrong with my mother. The thing I hadn't been expecting was for _Paige_ to actually be the Greplin and I was kind of annoyed that I hadn't felt that. Why were my senses off? I _hated_ that things were like this and I just wanted to be trained so that I wouldn't be so caught off guard. Was it because I still kept thinking about Dean and how I was sorry?

"You lied to me," I told Paige.

Paige smiled at. "And it was easy—I even got you to leave the boyfriend at home."

I looked at the ground. "I'm such an idiot…"

"No you're not. You're just too trusting." Paige said with a smile. "It's all right."

"Stop talking to me like we're friends," I told her. "We're not."

Kate came bursting in with Kalli, both thinking something was up, and before we knew what was happening, Kate was thrown through a wall, and Kalli was tossed out a window. Paige shrugged, and then she pulled out a gun, shooting Mom three times before Annie and I got to her. Annie used her powers to throw Paige up against the wall, and I took out the syringe, stabbing it into her flesh. She started to scream as the antidote went into her, and Annie stopped pinning her there, running over to Mom, who was coughing.

"You son of a bitch!" I yelled at Paige.

Something in my voice was deep and demonic, and I knew my eyes were flashing yellow, but I had control. I didn't know where the control had come from, but I knew where the pain and the anger had and I knew I couldn't let my life be like this…I couldn't have more blood on my hands. Paige kept screaming, now writhing on the floor, me turning to make sure Mom was okay, Annie stroking Mom's hair as she smiled weakly at us and I felt my heart breaking.

"She's a good shot," Mom said, and laughed a little. "These silver bullets kind of tickle."

I shook my head, the tears coming. "That's not the appropriate word, Mom."

"I have a good few minutes left, but that's it…" Mom told us. "Tell Bobby thank you—he'll understand."

"No," I told her, shaking my head some more. "That's not true. Mom?"

Even as I said that, Annie got up, the Greplin having just come out of Paige, and Mom was looking paler than ever. I didn't know what to do. I knew I should have been focusing on killing the Greplin but how could I do that? How could I leave my mother when she was looking so pale and weak, her head in my lap?

"Mommy?" I asked as her eyes rolled back. "Mommy?"

I held her to me and I cried, wondering why all of this was happening and blaming myself all at the same time. Why hadn't I just let Dean come? If I had been more sensible about this, Paige never would have gotten in those shots…unless she'd have just shot Dean instead. I stroked Mom's hair and cried a little harder as her breathing slowly became nonexistent.

"Come on, Mommy. Please. Stick it out. Please. Don't leave me, Mommy. I still need you." I sobbed loudly. "Please, Mommy."

"She's gone," came a demonic voice. "You're making this _far _too easy, Lana. You better be careful or you're going to end up in the wrong place."

Annie flung the Greplin against the wall, but we both knew it was using its last breath to get to us. The Greplin melted, blood and guts everywhere, and Annie made a face—it smelled. She came over to Mom as Paige began to stir, cringing and coughing—her body was in bad shape.

"I'm sorry," she said softly.

It was then that I remembered that you remember what happens when you're possessed by a Greplin—its one of their more terrible traits. You can try your hardest to fight it while it's in you but even the strongest people can't honestly force one out by sheer will. Greplins…if I never came across another one in my life that would be fine by me. They were nasty little buggers and one had just killed my mother.

"I'm so sorry," Paige said, crying now.

"It wasn't your fault," I told her, and Annie, Kate and I helped Paige back to the hospital, having to admit Kalli, who was in a coma, and then went back for Mom's body.

"I can't do this, Lanni," Annie admitted slowly.

I wrapped my arms around her, and we cried a little before Annie grabbed a sheet and put it over Mom, and we hauled her all the way to our house, calling the police. Dean wanted to hug me, and I knew it, but we were still so mad at each other and I kept telling Sam that hugging would make it worse. When the cops came and took her body away, us telling them some creep was just randomly shooting, they said we would need to get the funeral and everything set up.

I went upstairs to my room, and I picked up a vase of flowers, throwing it hard against the wall. This wasn't how things were supposed to happen. This isn't how things were supposed to end. Mom wasn't supposed to die. I was supposed to have more time with her. Dad had so many terrible things coming to him—Annie and I weren't going to let this fly. When the Hell would he _stop_ doing all of this to me?

"Why'd you take her from me?!" I screamed, collapsing onto the floor and crying into the carpet. "Why?!"

My door opened, but I didn't look up. The tears splashed out of my eyes and I just cried, all of the pain finally hitting my chest. It was like I couldn't breathe. It was like I was reliving my parents' death all over again. She was gone. I had just found her, and she was gone—ripped away from me somehow by my own father…I had always thought that somewhere deep down he cared about her…but he didn't.

"Breathe, Lanni," Dean told me.

"I can't," I sobbed. "I just can't…"

Dean stroked my hair, pushing it out of my face, and I felt him hold me tightly to him. He wasn't going to let me go through this alone. He knew what is was like to lose someone this close to you. She was my mother. She gave me life. She watched over me. Loved me. Cared about me. Explained things to me. How could she just be gone now? He actually understood this feeling…had lost his father…

"I'm so sorry, Lanni," Dean whispered to me.

I cried into him some more, and after what seemed like hours, I lay on the floor in a lump, completely out of it. I was limp. I just laid there as Dean stroked my hair. I hated this life. I hated everything. Why couldn't I have just stayed dead? I never would have brought this on anyone. Mom's death was my fault.

"I'm tired," I told him unemotionally, and I got up, getting into bed fully clothed, laying there, nuzzling my pillow with my nose.

Dean got up and nodded. "You want me to stay with you?"

"Please…" I whispered, closing my eyes.

I heard Dean flip the light switch to turn the light off and he crawled onto the bed and held me to him protectively. He was spooning me from behind with his hand protectively on my stomach, keeping me close and kissing behind my ear to let me know that he loved me and regardless of fighting, we were in this together. I started to cry again, wishing that the tears would stop coming, but they wouldn't. I couldn't even cry myself out…this was terrible.

xx

When I woke up the next morning, I turned over, knowing that by the amount of warmth, Dean was still in my bed. He smiled at me a little, and stroked my hair and when I went to flex my fingers I realized he'd put the ring back on my finger. I really appreciated it, but at the same time I had wished we could talk about the fight…but now wasn't the time…the fight didn't matter right now.

"How shitty do I look?" I asked him.

He smiled at me. "You look beautiful, Lanni."

"A lie, but I appreciate it," I told him nodding.

He kissed me, but I only responded briefly—I didn't feel like I could be happy right now. Everything just seemed to be falling apart around me and I didn't know what to do and I wanted to talk to Dean but I couldn't. Every time I started to open my mouth to ask him what the Hell was happening between us, I felt like I was a terrible person for coming back to it when my mother was dead.

"Sam found a hunt," Dean said trying to act like me not kissing him back was normal.

I nodded and got out of bed. "I have class today…"

"I know that you won't want to hear this, especially from me, but your mother just died. Skip school." Dean told me.

"I have to keep myself busy and if I hunt a demon right now…I just don't know," I said firmly. "Maybe Paige will pick me up."

Dean made a face. "Paige? Why not let me take you?"

"Sam found a hunt." I reminded him. "You need to be here with him."

"No, I need to be with you wherever you are. You're the one that needs me." He said softly. "Sam has Kate."

I started to change. "I don't need you."

Dean looked at me like he understood my pain and I sighed and grabbed his hand as he started to leave my room. That hadn't come out right and I hadn't meant it I just—I was _not _in the right frame of mind and I needed to talk now. I needed to get everything off of my mind and Dean looked at me sadly as the tears started to roll down my cheeks again.

"Baby, I didn't mean that," I told him softly, my voice cracking. "I _do _need you…and I don't _want _to go to school—I don't want to go back there at all. I just feel like you want me to go hunt with you but you don't really because you won't let me do anything, and I feel like I'm going to take this out on like the first person who crosses me."

Dean nodded and pulled me down on his lap me in my bra and jeans because I had been trying to change. He kissed me and he stroked my hair, nodding and kissing me more as I cried a little because the kiss felt so wonderful and yet I was kind of happy and my mother was gone and I felt bad. Had this been how Dean had felt after John had died? Because I understood why he turned the sex down now…I would too right now.

"I wish I could make your pain go away," Dean whispered his forehead to mine.

I nodded and took a shaky breath. "I wish it would just go away."

"A hunt will get your mind off of things," he told me, trying to change the subject. "After the funeral tomorrow morning…head out with me and Sammy?"

"Okay…I think I can do that." I said resting my head in the crook of his neck and letting him hold me close. "I think I can do that."

xx

Mom's funeral was harder on me than on anyone else. When she actually got buried, I had an episode. My eyes glowed yellow and I got violent—I had to buy a new television, because I broke mine—like it shattered. Then, if it wasn't enough that Mom was being buried, that afternoon Kalli's organs began to fail so Sam called Bobby and had _him_ take the case instead. I visited her everyday after school—Dean and I had both decided that I needed my mind off of things, so he drove me there and picked me up—he even met Ryan—let me tell you now, he didn't like Ryan.

"She's going to be fine. She'll wake up and have a full recovery," Paige told me one afternoon while Dean grabbed me some coffee.

I just kissed Kalli's limp hand. "If only I was that lucky in life."

Ryan rested his hand on my back and rubbed it, and I smiled a little because they cared so much. At the same time it was awkward that he was touching me and I was honestly _so _relieved when Dean showed up. I smiled a little when Ryan's hand shot off of my back and Dean kissed the top of my head.

"How's she doing?" Dean asked me, sitting in the chair as I got up and then sat on his lap cuddling into him.

I shook my head. "We've all said our 'goodbyes'…sound familiar?"

"Baby, you can't think like that," Dean whispered softly.

"I don't know what _else_ to think…" I told him dismally.

He and I got up and went to the waiting room where Sam was still holding Kate to him, stroking her hair and kissing her forehead. I hadn't really taken the time lately to look at the two of them closely but even if Sam wasn't really understanding what was going on—and he should because he wasn't stupid—Kate was _definitely_ in love with Sam…or at least _I_ was pretty damn sure that she was…and Sam felt the same way. Had they said it to each other yet?

Before I could even bring it up with Dean though, the monitors began to beep, and a nurse ran in, followed by a couple other nurses and a couple doctors. Dean and I watched by the door, Kate, Annie and I huddled together, the tears coming. It was even worse when the doctor pronounced her dead and told us the time of death, Sam holding Kate close as she turned into him, crying into his chest.

It felt like everyone around me was being picked off, one by one, and to make it worse, Jen told me my episodes were getting worse. This time I wrecked the basement. Dean stood by me the whole way through and held my hand at Kalli's funeral, kissing the top of my head. Afterwards we went home and I decided I was definitely going with the boys hunting because I couldn't do this anymore. I was no longer going to be some target…it just wasn't alright. I was stronger than this and I was going to beat this.

I went to go and check on Annie because I knew that in all of this she was wishing that Sam was there to comfort her. I had comforted Kate a little bit, but mostly Sam was taking care of that and I thought that was great, honestly that they had each other. Annie held me close to her and stroked my hair but something was different…something was off. She felt me tensing up, pulled away and whispered an incantation, sending me flying across the room, all the air going out of me before I blacked out.

When I woke up in the hospital, I sighed a bit—honestly wasn't the hospital getting to be such a damn redundant place?! Dean was sitting next to my bed, and he kissed my hand, smiling at me and stroking me hair as I woke up. I smiled a little too and squeezed his hand, making a face because honestly my head felt pretty sore—damn wall making contact with it!

"You, my love, are in hospitals way too often," he whispered to me.

"Did you just seriously say, 'my love'?" I asked him, raising my eyebrows. "How hard did I hit my head?"

He laughed and rolled his eyes. "At least your personality is still intact."

"Where's Sammy? Annie? Kate?" I asked then.

"Sammy's getting coffee with Kate and checking with the doctor's about checking you out and Annie…haven't seen her now that you mention it." Dean pondered.

I sighed loudly. "Well figures—she's the one that did this to me."

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath when Dean asked me if I was sure and I tried to think. First Mom was killed, then Kalli died, and now…now Annie was evil or something? Why in the world had she just snapped like that and done that? Did she have a reason? Was this a psychic thing? Was Dad possessing her? What in God's name was going on around here these days and why?

"This has been the worst month of my very short second life," I told Dean, opening up my eyes.

Dean shrugged a little. "I wouldn't say _worst_…"

I gave him a look. "No? My mother is dead, my cousin is dead, my sister is off God knows where doing God knows what and—"

"—we're pregnant," Dean told me.

I stopped talking and looked directly at him my mouth agape, a smile on Dean's face and I felt my heart start to beat faster. Wait a minute…how could that be? I mean yeah…we'd had sex a month ago—and sure after that and even to try and make me feel better with all the bad stuff happening lately—but we wouldn't even be able to hear a heartbeat for a week or two more so why get my hopes up? What the Hell? How did he even know?

"What?" I asked him softly, and I knew it was barely audible.

Dean scooted his chair closer to me. "When the doctor was going over your charts I mentioned that we'd been trying and he took a blood sample and you're definitely showing 'high levels of hCG' as he put it. So…we're baking cookies…he thinks, anyway. It's possible you're just…ovulating."

I laughed a bit when he whispered the last word. "It's not a bad word, Dean."

"It's awkward…" Dean responded quickly.

"But…but…our baby's so tiny we can't even hear a heartbeat yet," I told him, my eyes glues on my stomach, and my free hand on it now. "That means it's all new and still and embryo and—how many days? Did he say?"

"You're suddenly all excited," Dean said with a smile on his face. "Based off of the information I gave him about our sex lives, he's thinking three weeks so around 21 days…or again, could be the other thing."

I laughed a little. "Wow…it's still an embryo. I probably won't show any signs for a good like…two or three weeks. Are you sure? Or are you just telling me this to make me feel better? It will be another three days about depending on when the cookies started baking in my uterus for a pregnancy test to read the most accurately."

"That's why it's called a _blood _test," Dean told me. "I mean we're going to have to come back to make sure since I don't know anything about your cycles, but…it's possible you came back a little _too _shiny and new."

I just stared at him and then smiled, pulling on his hand and kissing him when he brought his lips to mine. He knew what I wanted and though my hopes were up and we weren't sure, we kissed anyway. He ran his fingers through my hair and then rest his hand on my stomach and stroked it with his thumb making me pull back and look him in the eye.

"And you're sure about all of this? Because everything is different and I am _not_ going to just sit around while you and Sam hunt. I'm going with you." I told him.

Dean nodded and rested his forehead against mine, closing his eyes. "I know…you're a stubborn piece of work."

"I'm taking that as a compliment," I said with a smile, kissing him again.

The doctor came in and said I was good to go but to come back to check on the potential baby, and I nodded. Then the boys and I packed up to get ready to go, me looking up abruptly as Sam and Dean got in and Kate tossed a duffle into the car. I smiled though because I knew she was coming, it was just a really sudden movement was all.

"I told Sam I love him," Kate said as we got into the back seat.

"I _knew_ you were in love with Sammy!" I said excitedly.

She reached over and covered my mouth with her hand. "Shut-up! He'll _hear_ you!"

"Dean will sing about it, so…my lips are sealed," I told her with a smile and I pointed to the car. "Still, I'm happy you told him because it's obvious."

Kate smiled at me and got into the car, me telling the boys that we were ready to go when they were. It was going to be the four of us and Dean just nodded and Sam smiled and I looked from Kate to Sam, to Kate and laughed a little when Kate punched me in the arm and told me to cut it out. I put my hands up in surrender and then looked at Dean and he nodded at me—until we were sure, we weren't going to tell _anyone_ about the baby.

xx

When we got to the motel, I actually smiled—I had never been this happy to see a run-down place as much before. It felt like the old times even though these were new times and it was time to start making some new memories. This was going to be fun though because it would be nice to see love blossom for Sam…and with my favorite cousin no doubt. Even so…I missed Annie and Sam and Dean missed working with just each other, but we didn't mind this foursome arrangement either.

"Kate? Sammy? I think you left your appetite at the diner around the block. You must be so hungry you'll be there for an hour—maybe two," Dean told them and I turned to him and gave him a look as Sam laughed.

I took Dean's hand. "Let them settle in at least, Dean."

"No it's fine." Kate replied, stepping close to Sam—oh, I saw how it was: she wanted alone time with Sam too.

"You're smooth," Sam told Dean, and then left the motel with Kate.

I rolled my eyes and sat on the bed I'd claimed, opening up my laptop and looking up at Dean as he cleared his throat. It was kind of cute that he wanted to be with me and sleep together and have some fun, but I wanted to check in on Jen. She had Kevin to lean on even though he was annoyed she'd done the ritual to bring me back to life, but at the same time she felt bad about the deaths too.

"I didn't get him out of here so you could play Nancy Drew," Dean said, unbuttoning his buttons.

I smiled up at him. "I think Sam left because Kate wanted to spend time with him. You know eventually we may have to leave to give _them _the motel room."

"Really?" Dean asked me. "I think they left cause they didn't want to listen to us go at it. If we want that baby, we need to keep going."

"Cause we're normally _so_ loud," I told him rolling my eyes.

Dean got onto the bed with me, and wrapped his arms around me, pushing my hair off of my shoulder and lowering the sleeve. I leaned back into him, and he ran his hands along my arms, resting his head on my shoulder. He was cute, and I adored him and after one e-mail, I'd do _whatever_ it was that he wanted me to do.

"I miss my mother," I told him. "I miss her and Kalli _so_ much. Hell, I even miss Chelsea."

I turned around and resituated us so that I was on top of Dean and I kissed him softly. He had no idea why I was suddenly being very affectionate, especially after saying all that stuff about missing my mother and my ex-best friend, and my cousin. It just felt like I was bringing us down and I sighed a little when Dean pulled back and looked me in the eye, stroking my hair.

"Are you okay?" Dean asked, and he looked me in the eye as I shook my head.

"I'm the reason Chelsea got turned, and the reason Jen was attacked by Hell Hounds and forced into early labor, Mom's dead, my Dad's the demon, Kalli's organs failed, I lost her, Annie's having bouts of evilness—I can't help feeling that most of this is my fault, Dean." I explained to him.

Dean shook his head. "It's not your fault, Lanni."

"I died and they felt the need to bring me back," I told him and when he gave me a look I nodded and then shook my head. "Hey, you wanna know what I found out when I came back?"

"What?" Dean asked me.

Honestly there was _one_ good thing about getting my memories back slowly—it meant that some things I forgotten before had come back to me and I smiled. There was definitely a bigger plan set in place here because when Sam and I had met at the wake…it hadn't been our first meeting. I didn't want to show Dean without Sam there though, so I bit my lip.

"Let's wait for Sam," I told him.

Dean nodded slowly. "Okay…then in the mean time can we do what I got Kate and Sam out of the motel for?"

"Baby, we can do that later, I want to show this to you now," I whispered, kissing him softly. "Hey! Hands!"

"I think we both know that I'm a lot quicker than you are," Dean told me nodding with that cheeky look on his face.

When I gave him a look and said 'Dean Winchester' in a warning tone, he sighed and he let me call Sam. He and Kate came straight back to the motel and I drew a ring that Kate helped me with and we all stood in it. Then I muttered an incantation and the four of us felt our bodies being pulled a little bit and the scenery changed.

I had once been scared about using my powers, but my mother had explained to me that I needed to get used to them. If I was in control of myself, then my father couldn't be and that was important, so this was a good start. I was showing him a memory that had been brought back by something Jen had said, and we saw a little me on a swing-set with a little Jen and I smiled and pointed.

"That's me," I told them.

Sam smiled at me. "You're cute."

"Yeah, I was adorable back then," I said with a small laugh.

"And who are those two strapping boys?" Kate asked with a smile on her face.

Kate was pointing out _exactly_ what I wanted the boys to see and Dean's eyes lit up a little and he looked at me. Once Sam, Dean and I had all attended the same school—well _Sam_ and I had once attended the same school, and Dean had gotten out of the Impala to go and pick up his little brother. I looked at Sam and our eyes met and I knew he had a _lot_ of questions and I only had _some_ answers.

"Lance had a class with you," I told Sam. "I never knew cause he didn't realize it until I told him about the memory."

"You were ten," Dean mused, looking at Sam and then he looked at me. "Then you, Lanni—you were nine, right?"

I nodded at that. "And you were fourteen, now keep watching."

As we watched, a boy came over and started to pick on Jen, but I stood up for her and got right up in the boy's face—Jen wasn't as strong at nine as she was now. The boy punched me in the face, and then Dean came over and knocked the boy down on the ground. Sam told Dean to stop, and the bully ran off, and Dean asked if I was okay and I just waved it off and walked away, Jen following me.

"We never even—wow," Sam said softly. "Jen and I were both bullied and it started at a young age."

Kate smiled up at him. "Yeah but now you're all kickass."

"You really stood up to that bully," Dean told me, squeezing my hand.

"Yeah—that was the first time I was saved though so…thanks, Dean," I smiled at him. "Amazingly enough, none of us thought anymore of it. You and Sam left the school and never came back, and the bully's mother got involved when I told Bethany about what had happened and _she _got involved."

Dean nodded, and then I took him down the street and we ended up at my house, and I took them inside, the people inside moving rather fast, because I was speeding things up. When it was dark and I was in bed, Bethany and Marcus sat down next to my bed and smiled at me and I knew what was coming. There was another thing I wanted to show them and I definitely had a point here.

"What story tonight, Princess?" Marcus asked and Bethany showed me two different books—Hans Christian Anderson, and Grimm Brothers.

"Nice choices," Sam said with a smile.

I nodded slowly. "Now which one do you think I pick?"

"Hans," Sam said as little Lana said the same thing.

"That was kinda cute," Dean told Sam, and I laughed.

"_**Little Mermaid**_," Little Lana begged.

Mom nodded and Dean and Sam stood there with me as we listened to the story. In the Hans Christian Anderson version, the prince is saved by the little mermaid but he sees this princess instead when he wakes up and then the princess disappears. The little mermaid falls for the prince from afar and in return for legs, she has her tongue cut out and every step she takes on land feels like shards of glass but she becomes the most graceful creature regardless. The prince even wants to marry her, but the princess shows up and since the prince thinks the _princess _saved his life, he marries her instead. Then the only way for the little mermaid to live is to kill the prince, but she loves him too much, and dies, destined to be foam on the water for a thousand years before her spirit could move on.

"You were a morbid little girl," Dean told me as we listened.

"I thought it was beautiful, even at nine," I told him. "I mean she gave up her own life for the man she loved because he was happy and that was all that mattered to her."

Sam smiled at me. "I think it's beautiful too."

"What's that?" Dean asked as my parents left my room and it was just us watching little Lana snuggle into her covers.

We looked at the window and I nodded, little Lana's eyes open, but she was too scared to turn over. Now I knew why—my father was standing outside my window…my _biological_ father, the yellow-eyed demon. He smiled a little, and then his eyes glowed before the real world came crashing back and I took a deep breath.

"What happened?" Dean asked me.

"I don't have that much power, Dean. I have to moderate it out," I explained to him.

Dean looked at me. "You looked so scared."

"I couldn't look, and now I know why." I told them. "I mean not only did we meet up years ago, but my father has always had a plan for me…I just need to know what that plan is so I can counter-act it."

"That's certainly what it seems like," Sam agreed with. "Let's—let's just be careful about all of this, okay? Promise me?"

I smiled at him and Kate shifted uncomfortably. "I promise, Sammy."

xx

_I was lying on my back in the grass during lunch one day, under a beautifully blossomed cherry tree, and Dean was lying on his stomach next to me, one hand propping his head up as he listened to me read Shakespeare's '**As You Like It**' to him, and the other hand running along my stomach under my t-shirt._

"_All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages. At first the infant, mewling and puking in the nurse's arms, and then the whining schoolboy, with his satchel and shining morning face, creeping like a snail unwillingly to school. And then the lover, sighing like a furnace, with a woeful ballad made to his mistress' eyebrow. Then a soldier, full of strange oaths and bearded like the pard, jealous in honor, sudden and quick in quarrel, seeking the bubble reputation even in the canon's mouth, and then the justice, in fair round belly with good capon lined, with eyes severe and beard of formal cut, full of wise saws and modern instances; and so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts into the lean and slipper'd pantaloon, with spectacles on nose and pouch on side, his youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide for his shrunk shank; and his big manly voice, turning again toward childish treble, pipes and whistles in his sound. Last scene of all, that ends this strange eventful history, is second childishness and mere oblivion, sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything." I read to him._

"_You read his words so beautifully," Dean said, nuzzling his nose against my cheek._

_I smiled at him. "Thank you."_

"_Let's go to a different one in that '**Complete Works**' of yours. Like one of the tragedies or romances," he said, kissing my neck swiftly, making me giggle._

"'_**As You Like It**' could be considered a romance but yeah, it's a comedy," I told him and then jumped. "Hey! You **know** I'm ticklish there."_

"_All the more reason to listen to me—we've read this one before," he said, kissing my neck swiftly again._

_I sighed loudly. "Okay. Okay—as much as I **hate** it…Romeo and Juliet it is."_

_Honestly I really **did **hate '**Romeo and Juliet**' because I thought that the whole story was kind of disturbing—man says he'll never fall in love again, then finds an attractive **much **younger girl and then when things go wrong for them, they kill themselves…yeah what part of that is in **any** way, romantic? Still, I flipped through my '**Complete Works of William Shakespeare**', and found Romeo and Juliet, flipping through to Act One, Scene Five—the only part I even kind of liked._

"_Is this the party?" Dean asked, looking at the book a little._

_I nodded at him. "Definitely the best part—well except for them taking themselves out of the gene pool…"_

"_Well aren't **you** feisty?" Dean asked me with a chuckle, and then without looking at the book, he started to quote it. "If I profane with my unworthiest hand this holy shrine, the gentle fine is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims, ready stand to smooth that rough touch with a tender kiss."_

"_Good pilgrim, you do wrong your hands too much, which mannerly devotion shows in this; for saints have hands that pilgrims' hands do touch, and palm to palm is holy palmers' kiss." I told him, looking him in the eye._

"_Have not saints lips, and holy palmers too?" His fingers slipped from my stomach to my side, and he rested his hand there, under my t-shirt._

_I gazed into his eyes. "Ay, pilgrim, lips that they must use in prayer."_

"_O, then, dear saint, let lips do what hands do; they pray, grant thou, lest faith turn to despair." He said, scooting a little closer to me._

"_Saints do not move, though grant for prayers' sake." I said softly._

"_Then move not, while my prayer's effect I take. Thus from my lips, by yours, my sin is purged." Dean said, leaning close to my face, his lips brushing across mine and then kissing me softly._

"_Then have my lips the sin that they have took." I whispered as our lips slowly parted and we looked each other in the eye._

"_Sin from thy lips?" Dean asked, his lips brushing across mine as he spoke. "O trespass sweetly urged! Give me my sin again."_

_I nodded slowly as he kissed me again, and I set the book on the ground, closing it, and then resting my hand on the nape of his neck and running my thumb along the bottom of his cheek. It was the longest kiss we had ever shared, and I didn't want it to end, but it did, and I opened my eyes and smiled at him as he ran his nose along mine._

"_You kiss by the book." I whispered softly._

_He chuckled a little. "Interesting we have that part memorized even though you hate the story so much."_

"_Yeah, but we always revert to that because you won't let me read the **good** stuff." I reminded him and he shrugged. "We've done that for the last week and Shakespeare comes easily."_

_Dean leaned down to kiss me again, but just as our lips met, Sam called us. We both reluctantly pulled away, and then got up, and I pulled my hair up into a ponytail and fixed my shirt, and then Dean picked up my book and handed it to me. I smiled, kissing him swiftly, and then we both grasped hands, our fingers entwining, before the demon showed up and his eyes flashed yellow._

I turned over in the bed, after my eyes opened suddenly, and I ran my fingers through Dean's hair. I was so thankful for him, and for some reason, that dream was making me feel naughty even though I really _did_ hate _**Romeo and Juliet**_. I kept thinking dirty things about him…it was the Shakespeare talking—or rather _him_ in the dream _speaking_ Shakespeare that was doing it.

"Dean," I whispered, turning over to check and see if Kate and Sam were sleeping, and they weren't there.

Sam must have gotten up to eat or drink something and Kate had followed him because they liked their alone time two. I was waiting for the moment we started getting separate motel rooms because it was going to end up being necessary and it would also be weird because we'd be two couples demon hunting. Who even did that? When did that happen?

"I'm sleeping." Dean replied, and turned over.

"Yeah?" I asked, running my hands along his sides.

"Sleeping," he repeated, but I could tell he was smirking.

I smiled and then I nibbled on his ear, smirking at his moaning sound. Then I got out of bed and went to the door as he turned over and propped himself up on his elbows. He was giving me a look that I knew all too well and it was really making me grin.

"You have my attention," he told me.

I nodded, and stepped out of the room, looking at Sam eating Cheerios with Kate on the couch. They were talking to each other and smiling and laughing and I was _really_ glad that Sam had a companion. As bad as I _still_ felt about making Sam get out every time Dean and I wanted to take things to a physical level, now Sam had someone to spend time with and they enjoyed each other's company.

"I'm taking Dean into the shower," I warned them, and they nodded.

"I'm just going to eat my Cheerios and look things up on my laptop with Kate," Sam said, and I smiled at them and then shut the bedroom door and went to the bathroom, wiggling my finger at Dean.

"Come hither," I told him.

Dean raised his eyebrows. "Where is this coming from?"

I just smiled and shrugged, knowing that he was going to keep asking questions even though I knew he wasn't complaining. It was something to jump at and _that_ was what he was _supposed_ to be doing right now. I mean were we or were we _not_ trying to make sure that we were having a baby?

"I had a dream you were talking Shakespeare, and it made me hot for you," I admitted with a quick nod. "I am just…so hot for you right now."

Dean smirked at me. "Yeah, cause I can speak Shakespeare."

"You could if you tried, but that's not the point," I laughed loudly. "The point is that you have to join me in the shower."

"I can do that," Dean replied quickly.

I smirked when Dean came into the bathroom with me, and I pulled my shirt off over my head, and then stepped out of my pajama pants, while Dean undressed himself as well. I turned the water on, and once it was the right temperature, I stepped in, Dean following right behind me, and his lips collided with mine as the water ran down our naked bodies. This was just another thing for us and honestly in all the getting acquainted with each other again, we hadn't _once_ tried the shower and here was our chance.

"I miss this," I told him. "I miss our old playful selves."

Dean smiled and stroked my now wet hair. "I miss our old playful selves too. Now let me delegate this encounter this time, all right?"

"All right, but I've already got us in here," I said with a smirk. "What more is there to do I ask you?"

Dean ran his hand down from my hair to my sternum, and ran his knuckles along my collarbone. "There's a lot more to do."

I kissed him, and wrapped my arms around him, my fingers running along his back as he bit my bottom lip softly. Our breathing changed as we ran our hands along each other's bodies, and then Sam knocked on the door, and we pulled away. It wasn't enough that Sam had to interrupt during the dream but he had to do it _now_ too?

"Yeah?" I asked, wishing Dean and I could continue.

"Dean, the phone's for you," Sam told him. "The man says it's really important."

"If it's important, you should get it," I told him, though I didn't want to.

Dean sighed loudly. "I'll be there in a minute…"

"It's okay," I told him, sighing too. "We'll pick this up later."

**Note: So the next chapter is a fun episode and I can't wait to finish it and post it up. This was a good 22 pages and I hope you liked it! I need to stop telling you how many pages I've made you suffer through…Feedback is always appreciated!**


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